Moral of the story: Never minimize yourself in order to be liked by someone. You’ll attract more people that will love you honestly if you just be yourself.
@@ivyshutes that contradicts your statement but dude above is right. Most men really aren't themselves. We make a facade and slowly forget who we are. But the original message is to understand value of yourself. Not to be yourself. It is understand that you are an equal not over or under another.
@@Somerandomdude-ug9hxread it to the end yeah i agree don't be yourself necessarily but know that you are not "worse" than others. If you feel you can put in effort to improve something there's no point worrying about that. If it can't really be something you can fix, there's no point worrying about that too.
It's an universal rule because most people are ungrateful. That's why I always try to analyze if a person is actually caring and giving before I open up completely.
@Bigheartoneggshells Idk how you read that not opening up completely too soon is the same as being rude? Also not american but I had a good laugh reading all that. You should get checked tho lol
Isn't the most successful &long-lasting relationships came from the both being good friends at first? Maybe bc being friends let the both of em know each other and in the process makes 'em love each other. And this is what happened to me and my bf. Even before seeing his appearance(ldr), I knew he's the one just based on his perspectives on this world and how he is towards others which made me appreciate his existence and eventually fell in love w him. It was vice versa. We didn't need to change each other; the right person for you will be for you no matter what.
@@ilkpg5127 yeah I heard beautiful women are super insecure about themselves that's why pickup artist be negging them by claiming they seen prettier women and be acting like they're too good to be dating her 😉
As an older woman, I wish more girls and young women would realize that it's not your job to please a guy, and get him to like you. YOU need to like him!!!! And YOUR feelings matter!!!!
People tend to belittle themselves in a relationship because of how they were raised(parents saying you’re not good enough) and if your partner is an amazing person, they will help you gain your confidence and help you become a better person. But most of the time your partner can take advantage of that and always be little you so they feel better about themselves. You’re basically feeding their ego by being insecured. I hope y’all are able to leave these type of relationships and gain your confidence all by yourself without depending on another person.
I feel this right now and it's taken YEARS to build self confidence and worth to say things that some people I noticed who had an upbringing where the parents made them feel little certain interactions in society that I have to build up the courage to do is nothing. For example, sales. That's why I don't talk to my parents anymore besides trauma that won't go away.
Not only with Korean men I think this goes with any relationship in this world. Never lose your self worth to please others. They must value you the way you are.🌸
When you value yourself and know who you are anyone you date will try to match your energy. Can't expect anyone to love or care for you if you don't love yourself. Glad she learned it early on.
Yes! This is it!! I don't understand how so many people didn't listen and heard the cliché "don't put others on a pedestal" when that was not at all what she said!!
An interesting fact about dating is that if you have under 5 positive interactions per negative interaction, relationships tend to fall apart. BUT, if you have OVER 11 positive interactions per negative interaction, relationships ALSO tend to fall apart. While these are only statistics, I think it shows that while you have to be nice, being sort of grounded and critical when it counts is a necessary thing for most relationships unless you're both near perfect cinnamon clouds or something.
I dated one and treated him like a king. Cooked for him, comforted him, was always there for him, even moved in with him (he wanted it) and turned out he cheated on me while I was out working night shift (my first day of work/return to office after pandemic). I remember he still dropped me to the office that night, bought me coffee and went back home took shower and went straight to the hotel to meet her. Until now it still hurts me to know how awful people can be when we bombard them with kisses, respect, faithfulness, trust and love only to betray us with a chick they barely know that can make them forget us for the night and pretend nothing ever happened. I smh feel sorry for the chick too but that’s the price she should pay for fking someone’s man when she clearly knew he’s got a gf and still expected for him to leave me 😂. Both are same. Horrible people. But I learn to forgive myself for saying it’s my fault (tho it’s not) and learn to move on from the past. I just think it’s a life lesson that you should always prioritise yourself, love yourself and respect yourself more than you do to your partner. Someone will still shit on you but that’s their loss not yours.
That's a wrong lesson to take away from the story because of a bad man. And we need more of this type of selfless love. We are getting narcissistic and hence divorces and breakups are rising.
I hate that this happened to you. It’s men like that who cause distrust in women because you said you were basically the best to him. Any person in their right mind wouldn’t take that for granted. Self love is most definitely the main thing a relationship needs, just as long as you have respect for your partner and show them love it shouldn’t be a problem
@@Givebackthescarf don’t see how the original comment didn’t respect herself. She just treated him very lovingly and got cheated on. Not her fault just the pos fault.
@Bigheartoneggshells your projecting HARD. As nobody has commented or said any of that. You just want to project. And she said she had no hard feeling and that 'self love is more important.? And "that it's their loss." So. Crazy you wrote a book about her needing to have more "respect for herself, but also not be malice, or it can happen again? What? She's clearly evolving out of self love and not spite". But even if she were she would have EVERY SINGLE right to. Your personal feelings and experiences are not hers. Most people would be upset if they were a very loving, caring, and selfless etc partner in a relationship then got cheated on. Clearly as she said multiple times will be having more self love, learned from the experience, and will know what to look out for in the future obviously. How about you worry about your own single self instead of accusing her of getting vindictive when your the only ones who seem salty, and trying to make a sad attempt at victim blaming for no reason. despite her making it clear she learned and moved on. and talked yourself into a circle. There was no point to what you were even trying to say. Just 'projection, or trying to purposely invalidate them, and blame them for being cheated on. Yes advice is good. No one told her to stay the same". And she clearly was not planning to? So where did you get that from? She evolved and learned from the experience, and will continue to 'Evolve from a place of "Self Love". As she mentioned a few times.
Men are not too different from us, women. Every man is different and unique just like every women is different and unique. I don't think I'm like other women and it's actually kinda disrespectful to generalize like that.
Honey, that's a universal rule. All men, not just Korean, will treat you better if you love and respect yourself. And not just nen, but people in general.
People are just like animals.. they smell beta and wanna dominate and treat people who are less sure of themselves like shit.. when we are young and unsure! …and then women have to work so hard to become self aware in order to be treated well and that takes time…?? What’s this crap. Men should start appreciating women who are lovely and sweet, and go to great lengths to please! It should be naturally reciprocated!!!
That’s not a “dating Korean men” thing that’s a “not having self boundaries” thing. You should never kiss anyone’s ass. If you are a good, decent woman with healthy self understanding who has something to offer aside from looks you’ll know when a bum man comes along and keep it moving.
This thing not only applies in dating a Korean man, it's for all. Don't please anyone, being true to yourself makes everything much lighter and genuine.
@@orangefield2308 🤨 not really I much prefer them to be themselves so I know whether or not they’re worthwhile, but as long as you aren’t a crappy person it really is not that hard to get a gf
This applies to all people and all social interractions. Be kind but be sure to not overdo it. Being way too humble or kind can make others uncomfortable and get them to think you are not genuine. It will also comfort certain people in taking your kindness for granted.
I dont think it just applies to Korean men but to every relationship. Acknowledging own value, strength and better understanding of oneself will certainly make relationship much better
There isn't an excuse for people treating her subpar when she was giving more of herself. That was her authentic at the time, and it deserved to be matched or respectfully declined. It says a lot about you if you see opportunity for sustained inequitable advantage in someone who wants to please you (and act on taking that advantage). Vulnerability should be protected ❤.
Actually how it's works for guys is we love women for their beauty but it just a big turn off for high value guys when a women is being too nice to them. Tupac Shakur even said in one of his songs I don't want it if it's that easy 😂
In her case, I think it's not just limited to korean men, but dating in general. You've got to value yourself first, love yourself first, for others to value you the way you deserve. So please please, try finding value of yourself before you go in the society that is hardbent on believing romantic relationships as a necessity.
This applies to men in general not just Korean men. I was like that cox of my kind nature but once I realized my worth & stop putting men on a pedestal but as equal, they totally changed. Def know how to treat me with more respect. Be urself beautiful souls out there. Love & Please urself. Although make sure to spread the love & care for others as well - just remember to know your worth ❤️
Jerks will be jerks regardless of how much you respect yourself. Your job is to be able to identify them before even getting acquainted. Usually the ones who dress douchey are douchey. No need to give them benefit of doubt
Agreed but maybe they aren't but even if so what. Strangers don't really deserve your chance. It's like why do you have to be the one that chooses a guy who went to prison. Maybe he was innocent maybe he's not why take a chance when you have other options.
this is the kind of advice you see a lot, but tbh, i wouldnt want someone who would treat me worse if i had lower self esteem. i would wanna be with someone who was a better person than that. i feel like the takeaway shouldnt be "men will treat you better in relationships if youre more comfident/know your worth", it should be "you fall prey to toxic relationships if you dont have confidence and strength in yourself" bc the right man would treat you well regardless of how much you love yourself
Agree with this. If a man is a decent human being, he would still respect you even if you were at your worst. If a man truly loves you, he would never treat you bad when you had lower self esteem. It is one of those realizations that I learned in my past relationship.
In all honesty, this is a valid lesson for *anyone* dating in *any* country. If you're constantly disrespecting and downplaying yourself, you'll usually end up attracting people who'll do the same to you.
Basicly, she said if you devalued your self too much while dating a korean man. they would start to believe you are worth less than other women. so you should not be humbled your self too much until even other people think you are not good.🤔
They treat foreign women differently. Being an ethical Korean but born outside of Korea I still experienced different approach. Somehow Korean men associate ALL foreign women with being "easier" and more "open-minded." They told me things which I bet if they had told to Korean women they would have been slapped onto their faces for🤷♀️
@@katgreer6113 I said what I experienced first-hand. What kind of twisted logics is it that their behavior should be respected by me but me saying the truth is rude?
@@lyalyakim9898 what??😭😭 No I mean I'm agreeing with you! The Korean men are rude for assuming outsiders do not have respect for themselves as women and are more "easy" I wasn't saying what YOU are rude...
That’s good, over pleasing anyone is never a good start in a relationship. Be nice but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to go out of your way to do that. Show your real self and the other person should be able to accept that fully. Peace❤
I think it is important for both men and women to value themselves, be themselves...be your best but keep it real so both in a relationship know where they stand and who they should stand with.....and never let someone abuse or take you for granted.
if y’all aren’t understanding she’s basically saying when you have respect for yourself others respect you more as well. they don’t walk all over you. don’t be a pushover. know your value and worth.
Yes! I don't understand howcome so many people didn't listen and understood this but heard the cliche, "don't put others on a pedestal" when that was not at all what she said! Listening skills are in the garbage nowadays
just cause other people are bad , you CANNOT become same as them . dont let them affect your goodness . if youre getting affected by them that means they have power over you to effect you .
Feel sorry for your dad. The mom is literally giving you advice from experience of treating their partners bad and not one thought towards your dad in your head. Dad's are truly under appreciated.
I learnt my lesson from u :') i was thinking so much about how this has been in my past life and yess guys who looked horrible both inside and outside did treat me soo bad. At forst they think im unreachable when i pleased them. They stepped on me. Hell same goes to friendships. Ig tome to change.... But its jus hard to love myself. The self hatered is jus too much to handle :')
This isn't just a dating Korean man, this is just dating in period but you bring up a very valid point. Until you want better for yourself, and you value yourself hopefully you deserve better and find someone better.
I've noticed this in my sister, she treats people far better if they don't try to please her but are their own confident people instead. Maybe it's just human psychology
Well this applies to all Men. If you don't give them a full picture of you to begin with, they will interact with you with respect to whatever this persona you are showing them. I feel like a lot of girls think the only way to make a guy fall for you is be overtly submissive. But that can often end up in people that take advantage of that (sometimes fellow women will too). Everyone has a certain amount of natural submissiveness. Just embrace that and show that as it is without overdoing it.
The lesson in here "Just be who you are, no need to fake yourself just so they can like you, be who you are and those who are real will see that value and love you for who you are" Edited: i just noticed few mistake on spelling of my sentence , but still grateful there are 30ppl who understand that hehe 😅
This applies not just to dating Korean men. While we want to put our best foot forward and give a good impression to a potential life partner, it's always important to know and never forget/belittle their own value
I like her and she is right, in life you shouldn't try to please people it should be somewhat equal of give and take. It's okay to take care of your partner, but don't sacrifice yourself for them if it's bad. We have to know our own values and not lose ourselves along the way.
She learned not to go overboard with it and once she relaxed the guy could see her better. Good mindset for women to have tho. Over here it's the complete opposite. They literally go out of their way to be a jackasz 😂
This should be a fetish cause everytime i hear foreigners talk about korean men its always connected to "oh im so into kpop and kdrama and this is why i love korea😂😂😂.
It's extremely sad that we aren't just raising woman to know their value from the start!! They should know they deserve to be treated better from a young age! Literally everyone seems to need to learn this themselves after being too nice, too humble, too soft... and then treated badly or taken advantage of. This is crazy. This also applies to boys ... Raise them to respect woman from the start! (And of course this goes both ways too)
I agree with this concept, but simply teaching people how to know they should be treated better isn't the same as experiencing it themselves. I feel like even if it hurts, experience is a better teacher than words.
There is a tendancy of women to go back to the toxic ex. And you'll be surprised it's not because they don't know toxic is bad. It's infact because they want and romanticise it. Proof: fiction and erotic that is popular among women.
what bs. Even boys don't know their value from the start, act very nice n polite,, get used or rejected and then realise we don't need female validation. You are sexist for wanting girls to be taught self love but for boys to be taught respecting women. Not everything should revolve around you
It's not knowing your value, but your worth. Value is determined by others, worth is determined by yourself. Value is what you are, but worth is your potential.
is it a "korean men" thing tho? I think some women just don't realize yet that these "pleasing codes" are old men would rather not be carried like a child like it used to be. we know when you're acting the same way you know when we are... I think
Full Video: czcams.com/video/oJcqNjWusl0/video.html
Why are your captions like the Indian flag?
Yeah I support please tell
She said them multiple times.. Howany were there?
@@juveriyataj you mean Irish🇮🇪
Ii
Moral of the story: Never minimize yourself in order to be liked by someone. You’ll attract more people that will love you honestly if you just be yourself.
“Just be yourself” lol if a guy took that advice he would never get laid
@@ML-cg9rh Have you ever thought that maybe people just don’t like you?
@@ivyshutes that contradicts your statement but dude above is right. Most men really aren't themselves. We make a facade and slowly forget who we are. But the original message is to understand value of yourself. Not to be yourself. It is understand that you are an equal not over or under another.
This is how to live your own life with getting far less stress
@@Somerandomdude-ug9hxread it to the end yeah i agree don't be yourself necessarily but know that you are not "worse" than others. If you feel you can put in effort to improve something there's no point worrying about that. If it can't really be something you can fix, there's no point worrying about that too.
So she's basically saying be yourself when you first meet someone in South Korea or else they'll take advantage of you 🥂
like in any relationship. that's the gold rule - to be fully one's self.
@@LoveJoyPeaceAndHopeForAll yeah can’t be a koreaboo and worship them 😂
Yeah just men everywhere
It applies to everyone and not limited to romantic relationships.
I think that's the case everywhere
Never let yourself be a doormat.
Yep, doormats never will be attractice
Doormats get stepped on.
Not a doormat, even in Russia we hate fake people who try to behave like they truly care about you even though they dont, its just for social purposes
Wise words
Or punching bag, cause that's usually what ensures soon after.....
It's an universal rule because most people are ungrateful. That's why I always try to analyze if a person is actually caring and giving before I open up completely.
@Bigheartoneggshells Idk how you read that not opening up completely too soon is the same as being rude? Also not american but I had a good laugh reading all that. You should get checked tho lol
@@Givebackthescarf Even in a classless society, people are still gonna be assholes. Weird af to talk about socialism in an unrelated video.
Only up to a point. If you overvalue yourself people ain't gonna do it too
I respect this girl.
She knows how to keep a man. Not to only get one. She knows her thing.
A Korean man not men there’s a difference 😂
@XYZ not in this case and All men aren’t the same 😂
@XYZ if all men are the same why do they keep shouting "not all men" when it comes to predatory behavior?
Yeah u didn’t understand a thing
But not everyone have a value like her.
For example, you.
being yourself is the key to any successful relationship. please only be with the folks who respect you the way you are, or simply walk away.
I second that
Fact
Isn't the most successful &long-lasting relationships came from the both being good friends at first? Maybe bc being friends let the both of em know each other and in the process makes 'em love each other.
And this is what happened to me and my bf. Even before seeing his appearance(ldr), I knew he's the one just based on his perspectives on this world and how he is towards others which made me appreciate his existence and eventually fell in love w him. It was vice versa. We didn't need to change each other; the right person for you will be for you no matter what.
Preach.
Yeah but it doesn’t work
You value yourself more, you will be treated better.
Lesson learned. So important.
she is mad self aware it’s amazing! respect
she is mad self aware of her insecurities
@@ilkpg5127yeah and she’s honest enough to admit them and you can’t respect that?
@@NY-ITA99 No, humans don't have free will and emotional urges are what generate all life's destruction
@@ilkpg5127 yeah I heard beautiful women are super insecure about themselves that's why pickup artist be negging them by claiming they seen prettier women and be acting like they're too good to be dating her 😉
She's the type to learn from her mistakes. Hardly self aware. The truly self aware ones don't make mistakes at all
As an older woman, I wish more girls and young women would realize that it's not your job to please a guy, and get him to like you.
YOU need to like him!!!! And YOUR feelings matter!!!!
Both people need to put in effort. Both need to be liked by the other.
@@user_mll374 Maybe work on your writing.
@@las9582
You totally missed the point.... Thousands of people understood.
Somehow you didn't... 😂🤣
@@las9582maybe work on yours. Your response was unclear. OP was very clear.
@@las9582No
People tend to belittle themselves in a relationship because of how they were raised(parents saying you’re not good enough) and if your partner is an amazing person, they will help you gain your confidence and help you become a better person. But most of the time your partner can take advantage of that and always be little you so they feel better about themselves. You’re basically feeding their ego by being insecured. I hope y’all are able to leave these type of relationships and gain your confidence all by yourself without depending on another person.
Very well said!
Very true 😢
I feel this right now and it's taken YEARS to build self confidence and worth to say things that some people I noticed who had an upbringing where the parents made them feel little certain interactions in society that I have to build up the courage to do is nothing. For example, sales. That's why I don't talk to my parents anymore besides trauma that won't go away.
I agree
The colour of the subtitles are Orange , white and green it's like the colour of the national flag of India 🇮🇳
I was searching for this comment 😂
Or ireland
Omg i noticed too
i thought i was the only one
NEVER DIM YOUR LIGHT FOR ANOTHER PERSON! BE YOURSELF! The end! ❤️
She's so sweet.
Her advice applies everywhere though, not just in korea, you need to know your value in order for others to treat you well.
Your high price tag wouldn't change your actual value in Men's eyes.
Agreed. In America, people will walk ALL over you if you let them!
Not only with Korean men I think this goes with any relationship in this world. Never lose your self worth to please others. They must value you the way you are.🌸
That's true with all men not just korean men. People treat you how you let them treat you
Translation : stop being extra nice when they are not worth it
That’s a universal principal really- “people will treat you equal to how much you value yourself”
People will treat you equal to how much you're actually worth, not how much you think you're worth
@@Azaqa you are both wrong, people will treat you based on how they value you.
@@rhysdolan7378 true but usually people will value you at how much you're worth
@@Azaqa okay.. but how do people know how much your worth? Who decides that? How?
@@Azaqa I think what you should really say is.. People assume things. Ego, ego, ego.
When you value yourself and know who you are anyone you date will try to match your energy. Can't expect anyone to love or care for you if you don't love yourself. Glad she learned it early on.
YESSS
Yes!!
Yes! This is it!! I don't understand how so many people didn't listen and heard the cliché "don't put others on a pedestal" when that was not at all what she said!!
Lol don't overestimated your value either. Which is the main problem girls have nowadays.
@@eehlohluell she was saying she was a people pleaser and downplaying her worth which is pretty much the same.
She has incredible courage to admit this to millions of people
An interesting fact about dating is that if you have under 5 positive interactions per negative interaction, relationships tend to fall apart. BUT, if you have OVER 11 positive interactions per negative interaction, relationships ALSO tend to fall apart. While these are only statistics, I think it shows that while you have to be nice, being sort of grounded and critical when it counts is a necessary thing for most relationships unless you're both near perfect cinnamon clouds or something.
Jordan peterson?
Is it you?
@@carlpanzram7081 He _is_ a psychologist, and statistics don't change depending on who recites them, so I'm inclined to trust these stats.
I dated one and treated him like a king. Cooked for him, comforted him, was always there for him, even moved in with him (he wanted it) and turned out he cheated on me while I was out working night shift (my first day of work/return to office after pandemic). I remember he still dropped me to the office that night, bought me coffee and went back home took shower and went straight to the hotel to meet her. Until now it still hurts me to know how awful people can be when we bombard them with kisses, respect, faithfulness, trust and love only to betray us with a chick they barely know that can make them forget us for the night and pretend nothing ever happened. I smh feel sorry for the chick too but that’s the price she should pay for fking someone’s man when she clearly knew he’s got a gf and still expected for him to leave me 😂. Both are same. Horrible people. But I learn to forgive myself for saying it’s my fault (tho it’s not) and learn to move on from the past. I just think it’s a life lesson that you should always prioritise yourself, love yourself and respect yourself more than you do to your partner. Someone will still shit on you but that’s their loss not yours.
That's a wrong lesson to take away from the story because of a bad man. And we need more of this type of selfless love. We are getting narcissistic and hence divorces and breakups are rising.
I hate that this happened to you. It’s men like that who cause distrust in women because you said you were basically the best to him. Any person in their right mind wouldn’t take that for granted. Self love is most definitely the main thing a relationship needs, just as long as you have respect for your partner and show them love it shouldn’t be a problem
@@tromboner6061
Did you even read or..?
Man’s cheated on her bruh and you saying she need to be more subservient 😭
@@Givebackthescarf don’t see how the original comment didn’t respect herself. She just treated him very lovingly and got cheated on. Not her fault just the pos fault.
@Bigheartoneggshells your projecting HARD. As nobody has commented or said any of that. You just want to project. And she said she had no hard feeling and that 'self love is more important.? And "that it's their loss." So. Crazy you wrote a book about her needing to have more "respect for herself, but also not be malice, or it can happen again? What?
She's clearly evolving out of self love and not spite". But even if she were she would have EVERY SINGLE right to. Your personal feelings and experiences are not hers. Most people would be upset if they were a very loving, caring, and selfless etc partner in a relationship then got cheated on.
Clearly as she said multiple times will be having more self love, learned from the experience, and will know what to look out for in the future obviously.
How about you worry about your own single self instead of accusing her of getting vindictive when your the only ones who seem salty, and trying to make a sad attempt at victim blaming for no reason. despite her making it clear she learned and moved on. and talked yourself into a circle. There was no point to what you were even trying to say. Just 'projection, or trying to purposely invalidate them, and blame them for being cheated on.
Yes advice is good. No one told her to stay the same". And she clearly was not planning to? So where did you get that from?
She evolved and learned from the experience, and will continue to 'Evolve from a place of "Self Love".
As she mentioned a few times.
Men are men all over the world no matter the culture. Always be yourself.
Edit: The explanation of my interpretation is below.
Duh
Not true
No shit. Regardless of culture we’re all humans in the end.
@@maya_jones3411 facts
Men are not too different from us, women. Every man is different and unique just like every women is different and unique. I don't think I'm like other women and it's actually kinda disrespectful to generalize like that.
All men treat you more respectfully when you know your own value. All men! Not just Korean men.
Meaning people will treat you the same way you see yourself, value it appreciate it and respect yourself before anyone else
Honey, that's a universal rule. All men, not just Korean, will treat you better if you love and respect yourself. And not just nen, but people in general.
For realll
People are just like animals.. they smell beta and wanna dominate and treat people who are less sure of themselves like shit.. when we are young and unsure! …and then women have to work so hard to become self aware in order to be treated well and that takes time…?? What’s this crap. Men should start appreciating women who are lovely and sweet, and go to great lengths to please! It should be naturally reciprocated!!!
The better women treat themselves the more likely alot of men will feel inferior and not appreciate it tbh.
@@sunnysodapop 100%.. just that being modest and nice, women get taken for granted
@@sunnysodapop that's their problem. Normal people will not feel threatened by a strong woman.
That’s not a “dating Korean men” thing that’s a “not having self boundaries” thing. You should never kiss anyone’s ass. If you are a good, decent woman with healthy self understanding who has something to offer aside from looks you’ll know when a bum man comes along and keep it moving.
You gotta have majestic looks to pull a Korean…….😭😭😭
Those majestic looks are only on TV, and when you do see that pretty face…, it could be fake.
thanks for adding irish subtitles
This is important to know as a woman regardless of who you’re dating. I’m impressed with her, because it’s a lesson I learned much later in life.
It's important for EVERYONE in EVERY sort of relationship.
This isn't even exclusive to woman or romantic relationships.
This thing not only applies in dating a Korean man, it's for all. Don't please anyone, being true to yourself makes everything much lighter and genuine.
except if you are a guy trying to please a woman during dating
@@orangefield2308Then don't date anyone if you can't be yourself infront of them. It will only waste both of your time and money.
@@orangefield2308 🤨 not really I much prefer them to be themselves so I know whether or not they’re worthwhile, but as long as you aren’t a crappy person it really is not that hard to get a gf
I think you should be able to please your partner as long as it doesn’t harm you and anyone else
Pleasing someone is different from allowing someone to run over you. The difference is the respect shown
This applies to all people and all social interractions. Be kind but be sure to not overdo it. Being way too humble or kind can make others uncomfortable and get them to think you are not genuine. It will also comfort certain people in taking your kindness for granted.
I dont think it just applies to Korean men but to every relationship. Acknowledging own value, strength and better understanding of oneself will certainly make relationship much better
It is not just korean men. It is valid for all men.
"comforting them" of course. we know.
Knowing my value more 🔥. Well said
There isn't an excuse for people treating her subpar when she was giving more of herself. That was her authentic at the time, and it deserved to be matched or respectfully declined. It says a lot about you if you see opportunity for sustained inequitable advantage in someone who wants to please you (and act on taking that advantage). Vulnerability should be protected ❤.
Tell her not just Korean men 😆 we woman just need to love & respect ourselves! Knowing our value 👏🏻👏🏻
This is EVERY man sis..the more you value yourself the more they want you❤
Or you end up valuing yourself more than everyone and nothing makes you happy. Pretty sexist to say "Every man".
Actually how it's works for guys is we love women for their beauty but it just a big turn off for high value guys when a women is being too nice to them. Tupac Shakur even said in one of his songs I don't want it if it's that easy 😂
Love it sis! This should be the standard. Know yourself, be yourself.
Everyone: talking about the girl
Me:the font colour is the colours of Indian flag(saffron,white,green)
In her case, I think it's not just limited to korean men, but dating in general. You've got to value yourself first, love yourself first, for others to value you the way you deserve. So please please, try finding value of yourself before you go in the society that is hardbent on believing romantic relationships as a necessity.
The most important thing I learn as girl dating a korean man is that: Size doesn't matter".
Know your value. So true!!❤
Being yourself is important but it's also important to put your best foot forward in a relationship and not to get complacent.
this applied to any relationship in any region, great general advice
I think that goes for all people all over the world! Treat yourself better, and others will treat you well too.
That applies to any man in the world, not just applying to Korean man lol
This applies to men in general not just Korean men. I was like that cox of my kind nature but once I realized my worth & stop putting men on a pedestal but as equal, they totally changed. Def know how to treat me with more respect.
Be urself beautiful souls out there. Love & Please urself.
Although make sure to spread the love & care for others as well - just remember to know your worth ❤️
Jerks will be jerks regardless of how much you respect yourself. Your job is to be able to identify them before even getting acquainted. Usually the ones who dress douchey are douchey. No need to give them benefit of doubt
Agreed but maybe they aren't but even if so what. Strangers don't really deserve your chance. It's like why do you have to be the one that chooses a guy who went to prison. Maybe he was innocent maybe he's not why take a chance when you have other options.
what is dressing douchey?
The thing about the value is so true. I need to apply in my business life
Awh, she’s a hopeless Romantic, respect yourself and still love wholesomely!
Men, protect that woman.
this is the kind of advice you see a lot, but tbh, i wouldnt want someone who would treat me worse if i had lower self esteem. i would wanna be with someone who was a better person than that. i feel like the takeaway shouldnt be "men will treat you better in relationships if youre more comfident/know your worth", it should be "you fall prey to toxic relationships if you dont have confidence and strength in yourself" bc the right man would treat you well regardless of how much you love yourself
Yeah, that's what I was thinking. I was kind of confused about what she was even complaining about.
Exactly, if the man is a good person he will be good and faithful no matter what.
Agree with this. If a man is a decent human being, he would still respect you even if you were at your worst. If a man truly loves you, he would never treat you bad when you had lower self esteem. It is one of those realizations that I learned in my past relationship.
Yo now THIS is a good point
In all honesty, this is a valid lesson for *anyone* dating in *any* country. If you're constantly disrespecting and downplaying yourself, you'll usually end up attracting people who'll do the same to you.
Her hand gestures reminded me of my students when they're doing presentation
This is good advice for any female in ant culture. She seems like such a sweetheart.
Basicly, she said if you devalued your self too much while dating a korean man. they would start to believe you are worth less than other women. so you should not be humbled your self too much until even other people think you are not good.🤔
This applies to all the ways you communicate in relationships. Always know your value.
All girls and women should learn this theory.
They treat foreign women differently. Being an ethical Korean but born outside of Korea I still experienced different approach. Somehow Korean men associate ALL foreign women with being "easier" and more "open-minded." They told me things which I bet if they had told to Korean women they would have been slapped onto their faces for🤷♀️
Idk but that's so rude. I get having respect for your countries women but be respectful to everyone for crying out loud.
@@katgreer6113 I said what I experienced first-hand. What kind of twisted logics is it that their behavior should be respected by me but me saying the truth is rude?
@@lyalyakim9898 what??😭😭
No I mean I'm agreeing with you!
The Korean men are rude for assuming outsiders do not have respect for themselves as women and are more "easy"
I wasn't saying what YOU are rude...
That’s good, over pleasing anyone is never a good start in a relationship. Be nice but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to go out of your way to do that. Show your real self and the other person should be able to accept that fully. Peace❤
What a sensible lady.. always remember you're worth as a person
This is true in all situations KNOW YOUR VALUE!
Girl it’s not just Korean men. I love what you, you started knowing your value and then they started treating you better. That’s the key
I think it is important for both men and women to value themselves, be themselves...be your best but keep it real so both in a relationship know where they stand and who they should stand with.....and never let someone abuse or take you for granted.
마지막말이 핵심이네요.
Girl: Korean tips
Captions: 🇮🇪
I was struggling with this too… I really need to hear this. Thank you!!
if y’all aren’t understanding she’s basically saying when you have respect for yourself others respect you more as well. they don’t walk all over you. don’t be a pushover. know your value and worth.
Yes! I don't understand howcome so many people didn't listen and understood this but heard the cliche, "don't put others on a pedestal" when that was not at all what she said! Listening skills are in the garbage nowadays
You got it! Love and respect yourself and all others will follow suite ❤
I love how she answered 4 questions when she was asked 1
Never expected the accent lol
she’s english speaker not korean.
@@baeyonceshe is Russian native speaker
@@ritassoul3516 oh my bad
My mother used to say “ Treat them mean and they’ll love you for it”. I used to try being a good girlfriend. They dont appreciate you.
no treat good people good .
just cause other people are bad , you CANNOT become same as them . dont let them affect your goodness . if youre getting affected by them that means they have power over you to effect you .
Feel sorry for your dad. The mom is literally giving you advice from experience of treating their partners bad and not one thought towards your dad in your head. Dad's are truly under appreciated.
If you treat him bad and he likes it he must be kind of fucked up
Your mom musta been a harlot
Knowing your value is good for every culture ❤ yourself first😊
I learnt my lesson from u :') i was thinking so much about how this has been in my past life and yess guys who looked horrible both inside and outside did treat me soo bad. At forst they think im unreachable when i pleased them. They stepped on me. Hell same goes to friendships. Ig tome to change.... But its jus hard to love myself. The self hatered is jus too much to handle :')
This isn't just a dating Korean man, this is just dating in period but you bring up a very valid point. Until you want better for yourself, and you value yourself hopefully you deserve better and find someone better.
this is good advice for all women, not just those dating Korean men.
Here in the west the best advice for at least 40% of the women would be to have some grace and speak properly
I've noticed this in my sister, she treats people far better if they don't try to please her but are their own confident people instead. Maybe it's just human psychology
Dear, it is not only Korean guys deals, mostly every man/woman do this when you are too kind or just kind, they tend to take advantage intuitively 😂
She's right, but this applies to life everywhere.
Well this applies to all Men. If you don't give them a full picture of you to begin with, they will interact with you with respect to whatever this persona you are showing them. I feel like a lot of girls think the only way to make a guy fall for you is be overtly submissive. But that can often end up in people that take advantage of that (sometimes fellow women will too). Everyone has a certain amount of natural submissiveness. Just embrace that and show that as it is without overdoing it.
Little does she know this actually applies everywhere... muahaHAHAHAHAHA- Great advice!
Bro spoke my entire vocabulary
The lesson in here "Just be who you are, no need to fake yourself just so they can like you, be who you are and those who are real will see that value and love you for who you are"
Edited: i just noticed few mistake on spelling of my sentence , but still grateful there are 30ppl who understand that hehe 😅
That's the Sigma rule actually.... respecting yourself first eventually people will treat you better.. ❤️
Absolutely right! Very right and knowing your value
This applies not just to dating Korean men. While we want to put our best foot forward and give a good impression to a potential life partner, it's always important to know and never forget/belittle their own value
I like her and she is right, in life you shouldn't try to please people it should be somewhat equal of give and take. It's okay to take care of your partner, but don't sacrifice yourself for them if it's bad. We have to know our own values and not lose ourselves along the way.
Hey. Great Job explaining. Must be hard, but Fun Country ❤❤
Ok but why do the captions keep switching colours randomly???
It’s not only about Korean men but applies to all men or women or any other genders. Love yourself
She learned not to go overboard with it and once she relaxed the guy could see her better. Good mindset for women to have tho. Over here it's the complete opposite. They literally go out of their way to be a jackasz 😂
When she said in the beginning it reminded me of that video ' in the beningging' 😂
Most important thing "be yourself and carry yourself well"
This should be a fetish cause everytime i hear foreigners talk about korean men its always connected to "oh im so into kpop and kdrama and this is why i love korea😂😂😂.
It's extremely sad that we aren't just raising woman to know their value from the start!! They should know they deserve to be treated better from a young age! Literally everyone seems to need to learn this themselves after being too nice, too humble, too soft... and then treated badly or taken advantage of. This is crazy.
This also applies to boys ... Raise them to respect woman from the start! (And of course this goes both ways too)
I agree with this concept, but simply teaching people how to know they should be treated better isn't the same as experiencing it themselves. I feel like even if it hurts, experience is a better teacher than words.
There is a tendancy of women to go back to the toxic ex. And you'll be surprised it's not because they don't know toxic is bad. It's infact because they want and romanticise it. Proof: fiction and erotic that is popular among women.
what bs. Even boys don't know their value from the start, act very nice n polite,, get used or rejected and then realise we don't need female validation. You are sexist for wanting girls to be taught self love but for boys to be taught respecting women. Not everything should revolve around you
It's not knowing your value, but your worth. Value is determined by others, worth is determined by yourself. Value is what you are, but worth is your potential.
I'm pretty sure in a proper household when the mom and dad is there. Women will definitely know there value.
I love the way she explains everything. And also what she tell is also right.
Meanwhile me hallucinating Indian flag from the text
is it a "korean men" thing tho?
I think some women just don't realize yet that these "pleasing codes" are old men would rather not be carried like a child like it used to be. we know when you're acting the same way you know when we are... I think