German Tarzan(2013) is an Abomination!!!
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- čas přidán 10. 09. 2024
- Oh My God! Germany... What on earth were you guys thinking with this?! Aliens in Tarzan! Nuff said!!!
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Wait. So the boy was named Tarzan since the beginning? What?
In the original books and in the Disney film, he got his name from his ape family (if I remember correctly, it means “pale skin” and his birth name was John just like his father).
At this point, it’s clear that the staff of the film did little to no research on the original books or just wanted to do their own thing and it went BEYOND overboard.
yeah, like, why would they have named him that?
His name was JJ in this movie. He simply called himself Tarzan and claimed it was how his gorilla plushie called him.
Who thought Tarzan sounded like an English name? 😆
Then, why didn’t they just create their own characters?
As A German, I have neither even seen nor heard of this movie adaptation 🤣
Thank God 😂
This movie makes Dingo Pictures Tarzan look like a cinematic achievement!
The scene where Tarzan and Jane were in some magical rainforest place and were playing the song "Paradise" actually inspired me to write sci-fi, apocalyptic, space opera, Tarzan inspired , jukebox musical with the songs of Coldplay(specifically their Music of Colorspheres Album) and Imagine Dragons(specifically their Mercury Album). That and the anime film Belle and Treasure Planet. Also, yes. It's gay.
Send a link to it when you finish it, I’m actually interested in that.
Me too and want to see that project too ☺️
Honestly, I don't care if a character is gay or not but when it's _advertised_ as gay, then that's often the character's whole personality and it really turns me off.
Not gonna lie... sounds better than whatever this film was
Well every tarzan adaptation I've seen inspired me to make a modern fantasy tarzan inspired story with DRAGONS
no to brag
To be fair on the Clayton twist in the Disney movie at least they didn’t change his character after the reveal. Just like Gaston in Beauty and The Beast the villain has a whole reveal, sure but he at least stays the same character so there isn’t a whole thing when he have to learn this new character. That’s honestly a plus when at the very least the character is the same person they’ve been in the whole movie.
If you think this is bad, just wait till you see “Where the Dead go to Die”.
That’s the closest thing to an animated snuff film I’ve ever had the misfortune of stumbling into. You will not be the same person after watching that.
It looks like a rob zombie version of Xavier renegade angel
I'd actually heard of Where the Dead go to Die, a lot had covered or mentioned the film in their video.
I just looked it up, and apparently it’s something referred to as “extreme cinema.”
What does that even mean…?
It was literally marketed by Unearthed Films; a company responsible for publishing underground exploitation movies, including the Guinea Pig series.
@@masterseal0418 Pretty much.
You may not care, but in the books, Tarzan wasn't raised by Gorillas, the apes were a fictional species called the Mangani, which might be why they look off putting in this film. But that doesn't excuse why the Cassowaries look like Raptors or why the humans look like this film was directed by Robert Zemeckis when he was in his motion capture phase.
I'm not sure if this is worse than the Netflix series that had a crossover with King Kong and no, I am not kidding.
Heck the reason those fictional apes were in the books to begin with? The Killer Gorilla stereotype was in full swing at the time; in reality actual Gorillas actually lived up the friendly herbivore stereotype more than most people ever thought at the time.
Cassowaries are modern raptors
@@EssexAggiegrad2011 In the movie, they take it quite litterly by making them look like actual raptors.
@@EssexAggiegrad2011 Hardly. Closest we have to those would be the Birds of Prey, AKA the birds whose name was originally their own before the Dromaeosaurid Dinosaurs took it as their own.
At least the humans in those movies actually looked like humans and half of them were enjoyable. Polar Express is still a favorite of mine.
Absolutely stellar as always, brotha! Also, hell yea, the Disney Tarzan has always been a favorite of mine. Nice to see it get more spotlight.
It bears the misfortune of being released on the tail end of the Disney Renaissance and during the time when computer animation was slowly becoming more prominent.
Oh my god, this is like the Mulan remake all over again! I'm completely convinced that the makers of this movie did NOT even read the original Tarzan books.
I mean, at least the Mulan remake didn't have aliens or uncanny animation.
@@jeremyusreevu237 Yeah. Save that for the Pinocchio and Little Mermaid remakes(not the alien part).
Every time, someone mentions my country Poland in their video or movie; my depression gets smaller by a foot or two.
One thing I liked about the live action Tarzan movie (even though the movie was overall not good) was that they show how Tarzan's time among the apes had altered him. I especially like how you can tell his hands (especially his knuckles) were reshaped by his many years of moving the way gorillas do.
I can at least appreciate that detail. One other credit I have to give to the live action movie is that they are closer to realism about a gorilla fighting a human without the human having the advantage of weapons.
Granted a gorilla would easily kill an unarmed man in a matter of seconds, but I do like that they show Tarzan getting knocked around, even though the gorillas didn't kill him. It wasn't realistic in the hundred percent kind of way, but it did show how much stronger and powerful a gorilla is than a man.
I don't think Disney's Tarzan wasn't found by Sabor. She probably found him and didn't bother killing him since she had enough food and he couldn't run away anyway.
How smart she truly is is debatable but maybe she kept him alive to eat fresh later.
My God.. Can't believe l'm saying this, but this might be the best review l've seen from your channel so far....
Where can l start?! 🤩🤩
Your jokes are not repeptive, they're fresh and they always ends up crack me up.
The music you've choose for the video.. Beautiful!
Your points on the movie itself are beyond reasonable and clear to our minds.
The references you put on this videos about everything is incredible.
Your editing is getting pretty good with each month (or week, l don't know how much you made these videos 😅😂)
The accurate scenes you correct from searching to Google is shockingly clever (because yeah, before you, l knew about that snake Venom all along. But l'm so glad you brought that up).
Even with your rants and critiques, you always find a way to give credit on some movie you found or even watch it.
Your wild avatar expressions are hilariously crazy, and l love it!! 😂😂 (that jaw dropped part sketch just made me laugh)
...
And most all, the duration of this review is even larger than your usual review videos, and that is fascinating to me.
😄😄 You've truly evolved after all this time, man. Keep it going 👍
(also RIP to Jane's father, for those who've cared about him 😞😞... Which is none!! 😂😂)
I'm a simple dude. I see praise for the long forgotten and criminally underrated Disney Tarzan TV series, I upvote.
@@matthewdaley746 I actually didn't pay atention to the recast.
This is one of your best videos yet. There are so many hilarious moments. Keep up the great work!
36:40 😂💀💀💀
Dude your editing has gotten so good, love your videos!
As someone who has actually read the books, I can safely say, no there was no mediator.but it did have dinosaurs.
When you say aliens in Tarzan story, it reminded me of Chicken Little where the story is about a small rooster fighting aliens when the original story was supposed to be about a young chicken who thought the sky falling because the acorn hit his head thus he made the conclusion that so he wanted to warn the king while being followed by the adult chicken, the goose and the duck but they got tricked by the fox on the way and they all got eaten, The end.
When i watched this movie in theaters with a friend of mine, he thought it was better than Disney's version because the apes didn't talk
Wait...
This movie has the same lore as Pokemon Scarlet and Violet.
Think about it: a meteor lands on Earth, creating a living creature capable of creating earthquakes and unleashing mutated creatures all over the region.
Never thought I'd see the day in which a Pokemon games would have a similar plot to a Tarzan adaptation.
what really gets me is tarzan is clearly to old to start accepting he is a gorilla.
in both this and junglebook they were found as babies so it would make sense they would believe they are the animals the raised them.
but here he is like 7 or so so he should be rejecting this as he knows full well he is human.
ok the new poses his avatar does made me laugh but the jaw drop at 27:41 i lost it there lol
my dad used to by movies that were burned onto dvds, and he thought this was disney's tarzan. imagine how we all felt after seeing poorly rendered dinos instead of cute 2D animals and phil collins tracks XD
You know looking at the animation, despite looking uncanny,is truly impressive for 25 million a decade ago
It might not look good but it certainly is impressive
Awesome review RaisorBlade, the 1999 Disney adaptation of Tarzan has and always will be the best film adaptation of Tarzan, period. Not whatever this movie is.
Yeahhh!!
Raisor In the house!!!
Here’s to your success on CZcams
Cheers!🍹
I am german and I didn't know THAT existed. WTF is that?! I distance myself from this film! WTF did they think when making this?! D:
Interesting Fact: On 24 April 2014, when the film premiered in Dublin, Ireland, it was aided by the conservation charity, Ape Action Africa, which was supported by Tarzan's voice actor, Kellan Lutz.
I hope the apes were happy to find some support of being saved from becoming endangered, but it came at promoting this disaster of a film.
Clayton looks just like Ben Shapiro with lighter hair.
Even camp Cretaceous had larger balls than this, and all their kills were off screen
Oh yeah, I remember this movie. Here in Italy they kept advertising it on TV in the beginning of 2014, but it felt "wrong" to me even in the trailers.
I don't know how or why, but these CGI German animated movies (such as this one, or Animals United, or Monster Family) have these rather awkward and odd vibes, just by looking at the character design and the cinematography (especially the overexposed photography, the weird use of colors and the strangely-detailed-yet-not-detailed-in-the-right-way textures).
On the other hand, there are 2D German animated movies that deserve credit. "Laura's Star" (the movie, not the animated series) was a childish yet nice flick I still remember, while the adult and violent "Felidae" became a cult.
Speaking of bad European CGI animated movies, I recommend you "Gladiators 3D" (also known by its Italian title: Gladiatori di Roma/Gladiators of Rome).
A pretty bland, predictble and sometimes even cringey Italian CGI animated movie, made in 2012 by the same guy who created Winx Club. It performed poorly, its animation isn't good and the voice acting brought by Belen Rodriguez is one of the worst voice acting I've ever listened to. But that movie has its awkward charm that makes me """""like""""" it, I'm not going to deny it. It's bad but I feel attached to it nostalgia wise, probably because it was released when I was in 5th grade and they had us watch it in school. It felt like something special and new to me.
Birds aren't just related to dinosaurs, they _are_ dinosaurs.
Oh gosh, I thought that cassowary was a dinosaur for a second there!
as a partial-blooded German man, I'd like to apologize for this god-forbidden torture device we as human beings consider to be an animated film. This movie would be so bad that if Hitler, the worst human being of our heritage, saw this he would reconsider his actions and do everything in his power to become the next MrBeast.
I thought this movie was literally something i created in my head some years after i watched it. I saw it was on netflix years ago and i was like "wow, that looks bad and weird, i'll watch it for the sake of yes", and then i did and i was like "huh... Yeah that's not real" and i chose to forget it for how forgetable, bad, weird and unnecessary it was. I honestly didn't tought anyone, ANYONE would eventually remind me of that experience but here we are and i hate it :)
"He's got the Hapsberg jaw!!" LOL OMG
I like to think this movie was part of the Tarzan Verse kind of like the Spider Verse but with Tarzan and there are many different variants of him like the Lambert Tarzan from Greystoke, the Skarsgard Tarzan and the Disney Tarzan as well as the Weissmuller Tarzan.
And all versions of George of the Jungle
Yea sure.@@Dave102693
Hopwfully Raisor will find at least one legitimately good German animated movie at some point.
First the blockbuster buster review Tarzan 2013 now raisorblade takes The task of reviewing Tarzan 2013
23:40 holy shit!!! I never noticed the dead bodies in Tarzan!! Sure, I saw the blood paw prints, but the bodies?!! What the freaking hell?!! I'm eather a moron or I need to get my eyes seriously checked!! 😵😵😵😵
Germany, Germany, Germany, we forgive you for the sins of your father, you gave us cars, and helicopters, bacteriology, airbags and gummy bears, you’ve given us enough.
Fun fact: This child's voice is dubbed by Robert Capron ( Rowley actor in diary of wimpy kid).
12:26
When you said you weren't really a book guy, the first thing that came to mind was the William Shatner-voiced Puss in Boots saying "Reading is overrated."
Anyone else remember that movie? No? Just me? Ok...
Cool video, I like the HTTYD 2 intro, it was a nice touch, I haven't seen that movie in a while.
I love listening to RaisorBlade. Tarzan (1999) has better story, better animation, and better character designs. Tarzan (2016) is historically contextualized and actually acknowledges Tarzan's British aristocratic roots.
How did Tarzan go from a redhead to having black hair?
Also, Tarzan was the name KALA gave him, but his name is just Tarzan already here?
His name here is JJ. Tarzan was a nickname he gave himself.
clayton in this movie makes villains in Jurassic world fallen kingdom looks like 3 dimensional characters
Alright that’s a bit harsh
@@Theagentofchaos-r5q yeah it might be harsh but it true
@@henrymockingbird9645 yeah but at least he’s threatening.
@@Theagentofchaos-r5qif you mean the Clayton in Disney Tarzan than yeah he was threatening the Clayton is in this movie feels like cartoony Captain Planet ass villain give some credit the villains in Jurassic world fallen kingdom yeah they were cartoony villains but at least I remember them I at least remember the army dude who toke dinosaur teeth and i remember The greedy businessman who Selling dinosaurs on black market Clayton in this movie was just 1 note cartoony bad guy
@@henrymockingbird9645 yeah I agree. I just meant you being a little harsh to the fallen kingdom villain.
Edit. Yeah I agree I hate Clayton a lot.
Don't you DARE compare 'Mars Needs Moms' to 'The Mitchells vs. the Machines'. That is an insult to 'The Mitchells vs. the Machines'.
I have this movie and now I realize. Why did I bother getting this movie in the first place?
35:59 Peak plot twist
5:45; I bursted out laughing seeing that face.
Raisor just went Super Saiyan mode on this movie at the end. 😂
Clayton looks like callaghan to me for some reason
That was the character's designer's mistake!
31:00 Judging by that observation, "Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within" is a more realistic animated movie than this one is.
Oh yeah those helicopters you there Are bell uh 1 Hueys and V22 Osprey.
the Tarzan books are much stranger
14:08 to 14:38 was my favourite part. It just left me laughing 😂.
This makes the Dingo Pictures version of Tarzan look like Johnny Weissmuller's films!
Aliens in Tarzan? It’s like having cyborgs in The Jungle Book!
Also those cassowaries look like Dromeosaurs in fact the Ostriches from Jumanji The Next Level looked more like cassowaries than those ugly abominations
Donnie
The fact kid Tarzan is voice by the disney Pinocchio makes way too much sense
They should have adapted Tazan vs Predator, would have been a lot more entertaining. And no I did not make that up, there exists a graphic novel in which Tarzan fights the Predator. But as ludicrous as that sounds the story is really good, better than this crap.
Christopher Lambert in Greystoke. An interesting variation of the Tarzan story. Gorgeous cinematography.
But avoid the 1981 Tarzan starring Bo Derek and Miles O'Keeffe. Or watch it if you're a masochist.
0:00 and 1:50 i gotta say these two were the best sketch you did. nicely done
GOOD VIDEO, I didn't even know that this horrendous movie existed, I knew that the nose could make so much difference in the faces of the characters, it's good that I found a way to not let you be defeated by the arbitrary rules of CZcams
Kid Tarzan looks like glen from seed of chucky
Fun fact Clayton in the books is Tarzan's
*YOUNGER COUSIN!!!!!!!!!!!!*
Making Tarzan not get lost as a baby makes the plot he has no idea about other people exisiting makes no sense.
*"WHAT IN THE FUCKING JIMINY CRICKET'S ASS IS THAT?!"* Wonderful.
4:17
Thanks man for letting me know stuff I had no idea and probably wouldn't have no idea that it exists and I would have been fine without knowing this
The part where he mentioned the tmnt movie having more balls is kinda ironic because the comics is a violent comic
The comics were like shrek
@@PrincessMavenKittyDarkholme what do you mean?
@Dr mixer the comics were ment to mock frank miller
Wait really?I thought it was just for comics in general
@@dr.mixer8930 he didn't mention anything about tmnt tho
Brendan Fraser as Tarzan will always hold a special place in my heart.
Don't you mean George?
Yea that was George of the Jungle not Tarzan.
Yeah but Brendan Fraser also voices Tarzan in the German Tarzan 2013 movie jk is kellman lutz
13:11 - "Oh Tantor. There are no cassowaries around."
"Don't tell the baby such nonsense. Of course there are cassowaries."
"No, no. She's right. Cassowaries are only native to Austalia."
"And new guinea."
7:50 Guardian monkes, shitty dinosaurs, aliens, bad animation? I knew this movie sucked, (it looks like one of those bowling cut scenes when you get a strike 🎳) but I didn't know it was THIS bad...
Disney's Tarzan is also the first movie I remember seeing in theaters
Also if the current government of Poland got ousted by Germany....I would not be shedding tears. Duda is a bad dude-a
7:53 my guess is that the monkeys were just supposed to be a reaction shot to show how the ecosystem is reacting to the asteroid/mountain being disturbed, but they just shoved the whole "guardian monkeys" thing in when they were making this movies dub
Yeah, I'd rather watch the George of the Jungle films over this. Want to watch a good German animated film, watch The Adventures of Prince Achmed from 1926 (the oldest surviving animated film). Despite being almost a century old, it's still a thousand times better than this garbage.
Also on a completely unrelated note since this has been going viral for several hours but what's anyone's though on WALL-E joining the Criterion Collection? People are either really hyped or really concerned.
Raisor this was a funny video it really was it was filled with funny moments in the past but you said F it it was hilarious and most importantly I like how you debunked the four kids argument which is an argument I hate you made it funny by debunking it easily the best video so far
"...it'll make Elon Musk look homeless..." given how Twitter is going, the odds that your joke gets funnier are near zero, but not literal zero and that's enough for me
I was less creeped out by the animation of Foodfight than this movie's animation. And that's saying something!
Absolutely had me with that Hell Let Loose music xD
27:14 when I criticize with anger the stupid rivalries from the Pokémon anime 🤬
12:58 Wait a minute. A cassowary-like creature with a tooth and a longer tail and bigger wing arm things than usual. And its in a CGI film with a seemingly magic meteorite? Could it be?... IT'S CITIPATI FROM THAT 2015 ANIMATED SHORT FILM ON CZcams!!! I knew that thing could be reborn since in the end credits, it was in an egg that could hatch since, like the Phoenix, it was reborn from ashes! (At least it looks like that to me, along with the fact that the possible Citipati's appearance changed over the years. And somehow must chase humans for some reason, have sickle claws and there'smore of them).
Bro I’m still stuck on that f*cking chameleon! 1:24
36:57
I think Raisor’s a bit angry there
clay looks like Chris Pine 21:44
14:54
my first reaction was "oh no melted barbie died"
what is it with bad animated movies and adaptations of preexisting concepts in particular and weirdly centering around a family that owns a big energy corporation
ah yes the famous german band Rämsteen
Well we are pretty well educated in Germany....but the creators of the Movie must be the grand kids of Hitler or smth like that
Sheesh, hope your voice doesn't go hoarse after this...
Day One of asking Raisorblade to read and review the God-Awful Sony The Legend of Spyro script. It's written by the same people who did Marmaduke and Norm of The North.
If I can't get him then, I'll try with you.
I agree with you this movie has no reason to be animated in Motion capture at least some-movies like polar express the Christmas carol 2009 those In motion capture for a reason it was a stylistic choice these movies trying to look like a storybook brought to life Tarzan 2013 has no reason to animated In motion capture
okay I just have to mention this, this movie's Clayton looks like a character from Team America: World Police
They weren’t cassowaries they were dinosaurs for some reason😂
i was looking for this movie for 10 years idc what anybody said as a kid i enjoyed it A LOT
If you don’t mind I’d like for you to review the Monster Family if you haven’t already
(Also I really enjoy your videos they kill me 😂💀)
It looks more like a PS2 game than a movie.
Its meant to be an oviraptor not a cassowary judging by the tail and fangs.
Also I am going to guess the movie was dubbed in America, not Germany.
Color of the head and body says otherwise
As a German I gotta say I haven’t been this inspired and patriotic feeling after watching this masterpiece since 1939
You know WHAT!? It is also up there with the EMOJI MOVIE & FREAKING FOODFIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!