Trump's Records Are In Merrick Garland's Hands

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  • čas přidán 20. 05. 2019
  • Revenge is a dish best served Merrick. #LSSC #Colbert #Monologue
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Komentáře • 3,9K

  • @matthewgrotke1442
    @matthewgrotke1442 Před 5 lety +169

    "Do you know what an REO is?"
    "An Oreo?"
    I just lost it.

    • @kathrynstewart4927
      @kathrynstewart4927 Před 5 lety +11

      At least he didn't say REO Speedwagon.

    • @chezmoi42
      @chezmoi42 Před 5 lety +12

      Not to mention the "Amway?" for OMWI. He's hopeless.

  • @eschatological
    @eschatological Před 5 lety +186

    An empty chair would be a better HUD Secretary than Ben Carson.

    • @christopherb501
      @christopherb501 Před 5 lety +7

      A pyramid constructed for the sole purpose of storing surplus grain would be better at any job conceivable than Ben Carson.

    • @izzaduck8896
      @izzaduck8896 Před 5 lety +1

      So TRUE eschatological! It would also be less corrupt, or wasteful of taxpayers money.

  • @boyst3136
    @boyst3136 Před 5 lety +96

    We’ve kept more promises than we even made 😂😂🤡
    Priceless!!!😂

  • @christinemusselman5499
    @christinemusselman5499 Před 5 lety +35

    These Congressional women are tearing Secretary Ben a new one. Good for them!!!

    • @chezmoi42
      @chezmoi42 Před 5 lety +2

      @Steven Hunter Nonsense. They have not hesitated to go after Barr or Mnuchin, to name just a couple of recent examples.

  • @LeftIsBest001
    @LeftIsBest001 Před 5 lety +152

    Oh SNAP! The sweet, sweet irony of Merrick Garland deciding on the Trump case.
    😆😃😀🤓

    • @Trund27
      @Trund27 Před 5 lety +8

      Left Is Best it’s a ray of sunshine in the shitstorm!

    • @Amilakasun1
      @Amilakasun1 Před 5 lety

      Wait till Kavanaugh vote to ban abortions.

    • @Sandrae7560
      @Sandrae7560 Před 5 lety +4

      Left is Best, ahhh, revenge is a dish best served cold.

    • @1028641
      @1028641 Před 5 lety +6

      @@Amilakasun1 Wait until a trumpturd can stay on topic...🕛🕧🕐🕜🕑🕝🕒🕞🕓🕟🕔🕠🕕🕡🕖🕢🕗🕣🕘🕤🕙🕥🕚🕦 never mind. It doesn't happen.

    • @LeftIsBest001
      @LeftIsBest001 Před 5 lety +4

      @@brandonwalker5011 - Coz I'm a nerd

  • @neddelley8766
    @neddelley8766 Před 5 lety +452

    Quotable quote from Judge Merrick Garland -
    "people must have trust in the system so that they don't have to feel that they need to take justice into their own hands, it's our responsibility to see that it works exactly that way"

    • @spammyhell6566
      @spammyhell6566 Před 5 lety +35

      +Ned Delley
      ~ My one fear is that Garland might feel a need to bend over backwards to not appear biased, and might let DT get off easier than he should. Even w/rock solid decision, just because it's Garland, it's already invalidated in DT's/minions' minds. Whatever he does, it's going to get spun as partisanship.

    • @dianeveilleux6452
      @dianeveilleux6452 Před 5 lety +13

      @@spammyhell6566 The law is the law.

    • @Dakhoth
      @Dakhoth Před 5 lety +24

      Here's another quotable quote from a great American:
      “It may be a reflection on human nature, that such devices [checks and balances] should be necessary to control the abuses of government. But what is government itself, but the greatest of all reflections on human nature? If men were angels, no government would be necessary. If angels were to govern men, neither external nor internal controls on government would be necessary. In framing a government which is to be administered by men over men, the great difficulty lies in this: you must first enable the government to control the governed; and in the next place oblige it to control itself. A dependence on the people is, no doubt, the primary control on the government; but experience has taught mankind the necessity of auxiliary precautions.” - James Madison, Federalist Papers No. 51

    • @ahaveland
      @ahaveland Před 5 lety +5

      @@spammyhell6566 Oh, I dunno... blatantly abusing one's position for payback would avoid that problem and give a taste of their own medicine.

    • @sydneyparker9191
      @sydneyparker9191 Před 5 lety +3

      Oh good! Considering assassination with all my friends.

  • @Redorgreenful
    @Redorgreenful Před 5 lety +322

    “I’m not a rocket scientist. I’m only a brain surgeon” 🧠 🤦🏾‍♂️ That’s the most devastating sentence. How could you not know your job after 2 years?

    • @jelica9475
      @jelica9475 Před 5 lety +14

      He never comes with notes or takes ANY. He knows the questions AHEAD of time, why NOT prepare at ALL? No experience but in "tRump logic" he was perfect for the job cuz he is a rich black man...

    • @JabberwockOclock
      @JabberwockOclock Před 5 lety +19

      Well he was too busy embezzling taxpayer money through unauthorized purchases of silverware and dining room furniture to learn how to do his job. The lout probably thinks he'd be allowed to take them home after leaving office.

    • @toddvandell85
      @toddvandell85 Před 5 lety +18

      @Redcatrobe
      Well, Trump was fully unqualified to do *HIS* job. Even before he became president. Or since. Hasn't stopped him so far.

    • @catlaw1997
      @catlaw1997 Před 5 lety +8

      No one ever survived a Ben Carson brain surgery. Truth. Google it.

    • @kevincrady2831
      @kevincrady2831 Před 5 lety +7

      @@stevenbrock528 That must have been before he started doing experimental DIY brain modifications on himself? I thought he'd have a hard time topping his claim that the Pyramids were built to be Joseph's granaries, but this hearing is an epic grand slam home run in the Stupidity World Series.

  • @cliffy236
    @cliffy236 Před 5 lety +63

    LOL...that "WTF" look on John's face at 8:49 was too priceless

  • @bajabret60
    @bajabret60 Před 5 lety +607

    One could argue that Carsons chair was emptier than McGahns

    • @JSkyGemini
      @JSkyGemini Před 5 lety +7

      😅😅😅

    • @bellaventimiglia35
      @bellaventimiglia35 Před 5 lety +9

      Hilarious!!! 😂🤣😂

    • @kmgreves
      @kmgreves Před 5 lety +6

      lol truth that

    • @jvs333
      @jvs333 Před 5 lety +6

      bajabret60 no there was a suit there

    • @universe-ie2mk
      @universe-ie2mk Před 5 lety +4

      and just remember he a brain surgeon who used to work at one of the best hospitals in the world and once seperated siamese twins.

  • @kuwinsitall
    @kuwinsitall Před 5 lety +102

    these clips will be fondly remembered by me as what got me through these shitty 4 years

    • @julieannmyers8714
      @julieannmyers8714 Před 5 lety +1

      What makes you confident it's going to end???
      Call me a pessimist, but the odds aren't good.

    • @falidisu2139
      @falidisu2139 Před 5 lety

      Julie Ann Myers Sadly peeps.... prepare for 8 years or more 😏😞😔..... this guy should just have a stroke or something. ( can’t believe I said so).

    • @iDGF999
      @iDGF999 Před 5 lety

      8 years.

    • @AnxiousGary
      @AnxiousGary Před 5 lety

      @@angelsphere They probably do need to cheer up, but I agree with them. The odds aren't good, the vast majority of presidents get a second term.
      So help inform your friends about registering to vote, and give them a lift to the polls if you can.

  • @majed8192
    @majed8192 Před 5 lety +136

    "They've gotta turn down the lights"
    *The crowds start cheering*
    What on earth are they cheering for?

    • @I.amthatrealJuan
      @I.amthatrealJuan Před 5 lety +14

      Hallmarks of fanatics

    • @tweaker1bms
      @tweaker1bms Před 5 lety +17

      They're literally cheering for Darkness... Surprise, Trump was speaking to an army of the undead the whole time! :O
      Seriously though, that was the first time any of them wanted things to be blacker :P

    • @JustLikeHeaven77
      @JustLikeHeaven77 Před 5 lety +4

      It's all they got now, each other.

    • @JustLikeHeaven77
      @JustLikeHeaven77 Před 5 lety +2

      @@tweaker1bms
      I agree with you, but they weren't literally cheering for darkness. If they were literally cheering for darkness, they would be cheering because it's dark.

    • @zeusmasterson4117
      @zeusmasterson4117 Před 5 lety +2

      majed8192 Brain damage.

  • @jen3810
    @jen3810 Před 5 lety +14

    "We've kept more promises than we've even made."
    Wharton School of Business!

    • @RonnieG
      @RonnieG Před 5 lety +1

      Trump University!

  • @JustMe-em7hl
    @JustMe-em7hl Před 5 lety +587

    Merrick Garland should be in the Supreme Court right now not Neil Gorsuch.

    • @ittakesallkinds809
      @ittakesallkinds809 Před 5 lety +26

      Maybe he'll still get there if we can elect a dem president & let poor ol' Ruth retire.

    • @TragoudistrosMPH
      @TragoudistrosMPH Před 5 lety

      @@ittakesallkinds809 Apparently he can Garland can never be considered again. It's a one time nomination. The fact that he wasn't reviewed doesn't even matter.

    • @ittakesallkinds809
      @ittakesallkinds809 Před 5 lety +29

      @@TragoudistrosMPHWhat a bummer; I didn't know that. That really bites. Man I hope Satan or karma or whatever has an extra special coal shovel waiting for mc connell in hell.

    • @taruthemenace
      @taruthemenace Před 5 lety +11

      @@ittakesallkinds809 There is no hell, stop relying on imaginary friends and bring justice upon those ruining your country yourselves... America is way overdue for a revolution.

    • @chrisolsen8785
      @chrisolsen8785 Před 5 lety +26

      and especially not the creep Kavanaugh!

  • @kylestubbs8867
    @kylestubbs8867 Před 5 lety +190

    “A promise that you didn’t make... but kept... is just a thing that happened.”
    -Stephen Colbert, 2019

    • @francescamoore8463
      @francescamoore8463 Před 5 lety +3

      Ya know here in th UK trump is a slang word for fart....just saying.......

    • @deepattison9329
      @deepattison9329 Před 5 lety +1

      @@francescamoore8463 It is in the USA also, since Trump was elected.

  • @birdhead73
    @birdhead73 Před 5 lety +255

    That fool said "Amway" and "oreo" omg 🤣🤣🤣 gotta laugh to keep from crying

    • @loisstevens2745
      @loisstevens2745 Před 5 lety +10

      He had the munchies

    • @MrSullismom
      @MrSullismom Před 5 lety +14

      Oh he has heard about Oreos, black on the outside, white on the inside!

    • @hawkeye5955
      @hawkeye5955 Před 5 lety +3

      Ben looks stoned even though he didn't smoke any weed. 😂

    • @rebeccasorensen7070
      @rebeccasorensen7070 Před 5 lety +8

      Is there any kind of record of Dr. Ben's patients. Did any live? I wouldn't let that man operate on a cadaver.

    • @TheAshesvondust
      @TheAshesvondust Před 5 lety +5

      @@rebeccasorensen7070 I wouldn't let that man play the Hasbro game Operation

  • @pdute1
    @pdute1 Před 5 lety +200

    "Brace Yourself Senator McConnell; 'Payback's a Mitch!'"

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +4

      Okay I've got to catch up on Mitch and the cocaine t-shirts he's made over $70,000! if I were not so vain at this cap breaking off, I would make a picture and sell t-shirts and maybe I could get $70,000 I don't want that much I just want enough to get the tooth repaired! How dare he make a t-shirt about Mitch cocaine or McConnell cocaine whatever it was and his constituents think it's funny wearing those t-shirts we supposedly have a war on opiates lalala that's just a way for pharmaceuticals to make more money it's a bunch of BS and I don't like it! In fact the DEA is not too thrilled. Waste of our taxes. so in Kentucky when kids start using cocaine? Well of course it's expensive but? There's always crack cocaine! I'd be ashamed, repent burn the t-shirts and refund the money or give it to a very good charity like rehab for veterans. He makes me sick. So what else is going on with this goofball?

  • @shanehorvath9711
    @shanehorvath9711 Před 5 lety +40

    OMG Stephen and Jon's face after the "more promises kept than made" statement would make great reaction memes

  • @JR-gh8lp
    @JR-gh8lp Před 5 lety +52

    Thank you Stephen for helping us keep our sanity.

  • @PaulZink
    @PaulZink Před 5 lety +8

    Cabinet Secretary "Uncle" Ben Carson: "Amway? Oreo?" Even SNL couldn't have invented this doofus.

    • @Timbone07
      @Timbone07 Před 5 lety

      He probably just doesnt care.
      It goes to show that using political appointees instead of seasoned career people is a bad idea

  • @UltaBlueRev
    @UltaBlueRev Před 5 lety +450

    That Ben Carson hearing would be so funny if it wasn’t so sad

    • @victoriahoward8244
      @victoriahoward8244 Před 5 lety +9

      OREO

    • @ronlee5578
      @ronlee5578 Před 5 lety +24

      SNL don't have to do much on this one

    • @mrsmack213
      @mrsmack213 Před 5 lety +6

      Ron Lee I’m looking forward to the skits this weekend. So much comedy fodder in this week alone. 😂

    • @mrsmack213
      @mrsmack213 Před 5 lety +6

      Victoria Howard 🤪 AMWAY

    • @JaceCavacini
      @JaceCavacini Před 5 lety +17

      The GOP politicians in these positions are TERRIFYINGLY unfit for these jobs. How did this become a fucking NORM??

  • @adfundumdus6826
    @adfundumdus6826 Před 5 lety +413

    An empty chair... Yup, that’s summaries the whole presidency!

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +2

      I love it I love it an empty chair summarizes the entire presidency that is hilarious I needed that!!

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +2

      @@happiness1772 oh Lord y'all are killing me tonight y'all should be on TV!!

    • @kimberlys8422
      @kimberlys8422 Před 5 lety +9

      _Yet Obama played too much golf and Trump was gonna spend all his time in the White House_
      AHAHHA bullshit,

    • @alainarchambault2331
      @alainarchambault2331 Před 5 lety +3

      So, with no many empty chairs, just what exactly is the penalty for not showing up? Has any of them been arrested or charged yet?

    • @hodaka1000
      @hodaka1000 Před 5 lety

      A waste of space!

  • @czar8942
    @czar8942 Před 5 lety +109

    “We’ve kept more promises than we’ve even made” Hu? 🤪 😂 🤦🏻‍♂️

    • @robertgraziano
      @robertgraziano Před 5 lety +8

      I have whiplash from shaking my head!!!!!!!!!!

    • @MikeO5
      @MikeO5 Před 5 lety +3

      😂💀

    • @feeberizer
      @feeberizer Před 5 lety +2

      😆😅😂

    • @EmanoTM
      @EmanoTM Před 5 lety +2

      And they cheer... it's just amazing

    • @steventatlock5443
      @steventatlock5443 Před 5 lety +2

      It's funny how one single phrase can be so elucidating about a group of people.
      "I've done something that is both literally and figuratively impossible!"
      *rapturous applause and cheering*
      But then again... "These lights are bright."
      *rapturous applause and cheering*

  • @simplymck7822
    @simplymck7822 Před 5 lety +69

    "Oreo".. I am done. 🤣🤣🤣

  • @microchrist6122
    @microchrist6122 Před 5 lety +52

    No effin way that man asked “Oreo?” Lol

  • @wintertrooper7918
    @wintertrooper7918 Před 5 lety +144

    “Kept more promises than we’ve made” I honestly think he might have dementia

    • @jjaviercampos
      @jjaviercampos Před 5 lety +16

      Not dementia, he's just stupid.

    • @richsackett3423
      @richsackett3423 Před 5 lety +8

      It's weird because he's said that before. The crowd probably liked it so he said it again, just like "build the wall!"

    • @cliffordyuen1156
      @cliffordyuen1156 Před 5 lety +8

      Technically Trump isn't wrong. He's just missing a word or two. He made a bunch of secret promises to his Republican donors such as the huge tax cut for the riches that his supporter never asked for. So yes, he kept more promises than he made (publicly).

    • @wintertrooper7918
      @wintertrooper7918 Před 5 lety +6

      How many of the supporters at his rallies are paid hype persons

    • @WingsOfASong
      @WingsOfASong Před 5 lety +10

      Nah it's syphilis

  • @djinnisequoia
    @djinnisequoia Před 5 lety +297

    No ... no ... this is *not* happening. The man did *not actually ask* "Oreo?" Megaton facepalm.

    • @IAmSuzyQ
      @IAmSuzyQ Před 5 lety +18

      Yeah...I know. That was me too! 🤦🏼‍♀️ Oreo? Seriously been, did you just say Oreo? Like the cookie? How is this real life?

    • @notroll1279
      @notroll1279 Před 5 lety +3

      I don't like or appreciate Carson, either - but in all fairness: acronyms pronounced as words can be confusing. And most of these hearings are endless - and after a while of this, you can actually get as sleepy as Carson looks all the time

    • @nonyabizness.original
      @nonyabizness.original Před 5 lety +13

      @@IAmSuzyQ no, hun, not like the cookie. google 'oreo' in an urban dictionary. carson just made my day with that, the funniest f*king irony of all time.

    • @Winteramen
      @Winteramen Před 5 lety +1

      The man didn't. Ben Carson did tho

    • @Boobalopbop
      @Boobalopbop Před 5 lety +15

      And Amway. He also thought he was being asked about Amway beauty products at some point. He just could not give a f**k

  • @VultureClone
    @VultureClone Před 5 lety +22

    "I'm not a rocket scientist, I'm only a brain surgeon."
    LOL! Brilliant line.

  • @EASYTIGER10
    @EASYTIGER10 Před 5 lety +39

    Carson: "An Oreo?" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @hollyb6885
    @hollyb6885 Před 5 lety +22

    Amway? Oreo? 😂. Trump: “I hire the best people.”

  • @ladeakin01
    @ladeakin01 Před 5 lety +75

    "we've kept more promises than we've even made" 🤣 You gotta hand it to Trump, it rolls down the tongue effortlessly 👌🤣

  • @agrey832
    @agrey832 Před 5 lety +132

    7:25 Remember that time Trump looked directly into the solar eclipse? 🤔 Now he's sensitive to light 😏 Go figure

  • @patriciaa4451
    @patriciaa4451 Před 5 lety +76

    I read 'Gifted Hands' as a kid. I was so inspired by Dr. Ben Carson's story back then. What happened to him? Did he surgically remove half of his own brain?

    • @ruthingle1487
      @ruthingle1487 Před 5 lety +4

      It's mad innit, he's a neuro surgeon?? Did he buy his qualification from Trump university?? I wouldn't let him within a mile of me with a scalpel 😲

    • @faircompetition1203
      @faircompetition1203 Před 5 lety +10

      @@ruthingle1487 Competence in one area does not translate to competence in all areas.

    • @ruthingle1487
      @ruthingle1487 Před 5 lety +8

      @@faircompetition1203 of course not, however generally a person's intelligence is apparent in their conversation, understanding & even their compassion. This guy is obviously highly intelligent to have attained the qualifications he has, yet he appears to have no understanding or compassion for his fellow man, nor the ability to even desire that. It's so astounding to me that, although he is so qualified yet seems incapable of perceiving the basics of the concept of humanity. Therefore, for those reasons I would still not want him near me with a scalpel. A doctor surely needs their humanity just as much as their medical ability. Apart from the fact that he responds to questions like a teenager who thinks he's being clever but so obviously isn't. Such an extreme & bizarre dichotomy it's makes it impossible for me not to question the validity of his qualifications. No doubt they are valid but feeling as I do I would avoid him at all cost. It's simply how he makes me personally feel.

    • @faircompetition1203
      @faircompetition1203 Před 5 lety +5

      @@ruthingle1487 He appears to me to be a kind of idiot savant . You can become a doctor because you have a good memory and want money as opposed to high intelligence and caring for the health of others .
      My daughter was in science and with lots of kids working to be doctors . She was surprised by how many of them were good academics but very poor people and not that smart .
      There must be a reason he is not a doctor anymore and instead focused on selling religion, his name and his humanity . He seems to be after money and not a care for his fellow man. I suspect actually doctoring was tough and all the answers were not in a book and he may have needed to get out before it caught up with him .

    • @Celisar1
      @Celisar1 Před 4 lety

      faircompetition1
      No idiot savant. He is incredibly slow in absolutely everything. I guess he has a drug problem that took its toll after some time.

  • @directfader
    @directfader Před 5 lety +813

    It'd be nice if people were actually held accountable y'know?

    • @gz9975
      @gz9975 Před 5 lety +28

      Not likely. The vast majority of Republicans (and their voters) are willing to put their lives on the line for Trump. Why wouldn't they? Christians are bigots and childm0lesters. Trump preaches hate against minorities and hides out in child pageant locker rooms. Trump is the absolute perfect leader for Conservatives.

    • @TheActionBastard
      @TheActionBastard Před 5 lety +12

      pffffft consequences. This is a 1st world country run by corporations and special interest groups... consequences lol those are for poor people (us... because unless you've got millions, you're poor, even then it seems kinda iffy... you need that next number bracket to really just do whatever)

    • @puttentanesame6687
      @puttentanesame6687 Před 5 lety +1

      ya' radical...

    • @chapablo
      @chapablo Před 5 lety +6

      Past a certain income level they're nigh untouchable. There's enough material here for at least a dozen different civil and criminal casas, and at best he'll walk away richer and get his own show on Fox News.

    • @tlclandscaping8455
      @tlclandscaping8455 Před 5 lety +1

      Then you want Hillary locked up

  • @rgwak
    @rgwak Před 5 lety +182

    When asked if he knew what HUD stood for, Ben Carson replied, "Huh?"
    😃😄😃😄

    • @davidyaconis7002
      @davidyaconis7002 Před 5 lety +2

      It's the Heads Up Display. FFXIV's got a nice one.

    • @jannmutube
      @jannmutube Před 5 lety +1

      Trump is not ignorant, he's skillfully avoiding the issue.

    • @dontmesswiththelopez
      @dontmesswiththelopez Před 5 lety +1

      Ooh, I know that one...it's that thing that comes up in video games!

    • @philanthropical5520
      @philanthropical5520 Před 5 lety +2

      The "oreo" comment was my favorite "What is an REO"? "Oreo"? If these are Trumps "best people" I'd hate to see the worse ones. But then his idea of the worst ones are people with integrity that actually want to serve the public...

  • @iconicfury
    @iconicfury Před 5 lety +18

    “No obstruction.”
    Obstructs witness to his alleged obstruction.

  • @zgv8792
    @zgv8792 Před 5 lety +30

    Omg I LOVE Stephen Colbert 😂👏
    I know Trump’s watching 👀 👐

  • @m.rodrigolemus6224
    @m.rodrigolemus6224 Před 5 lety +88

    Judge Merrick Garland's TIME... Karma is a Mitch 😉

  • @internetpeople6113
    @internetpeople6113 Před 5 lety +321

    Stop with threats and impeach the criminals!

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +3

      I hear you just put the pit vipers in jail and especially McGoo right now they have reason to do that! he is in contempt of congress and he needs to go totally Orange as in an orange jumpsuit! Somebody's got to uphold the law here even Putin laughs because we don't uphold the law. Even Putin says people must obey the law!

    • @supermojo9672
      @supermojo9672 Před 5 lety +1

      Time to show some gut!!!

    • @tselengbotlhole750
      @tselengbotlhole750 Před 5 lety +2

      Breeze Incognito my patience is running out
      Mueller gave them everything, they must just plow ahead and leave a trail of mass destruction at the White House

    • @tlclandscaping8455
      @tlclandscaping8455 Před 5 lety +2

      Your finally getting nothing, and being very stupid. Trump 2020

    • @3DaysTillGrace
      @3DaysTillGrace Před 5 lety

      Breeze Incognito would you have said the same thing if Hillary got elected? Be consistent. She was more of a criminal than Trump, even though both are bad.

  • @bajaboy27
    @bajaboy27 Před 5 lety +169

    And to think some actually contemplated Ben Carson to run for president, thats frightening.

    • @lafierechienne6921
      @lafierechienne6921 Před 5 lety +18

      What's the difference from the fat ass senil clown we got now?

    • @mkjk2534
      @mkjk2534 Před 5 lety +3

      Rigo Rangel You sir are a racist.

    • @bajaboy27
      @bajaboy27 Před 5 lety +12

      @@mkjk2534 how so? Gtfo! I'm brown and skin color is the last thing i think of when judging someone.

    • @bajaboy27
      @bajaboy27 Před 5 lety +5

      @@lafierechienne6921 the difference is that the orange clown actually became president.

    • @bajaboy27
      @bajaboy27 Před 5 lety +2

      @Leonie Romanes thats a hard one to even contemplate, trump is an idiot but he ain't stupid, he does likes to think he's slick when clearly he's not, Carson's just on a different level, as president, i can see how he could do things differently, but I'm not sure about an improvement from where we're at right now

  • @Occam1000
    @Occam1000 Před 5 lety +5

    Those writers of Stephen have to be given a bonus for this episode. They make heart wrenching tragedy , gut twisting hilarious.

  • @mr.sinister2029
    @mr.sinister2029 Před 5 lety +447

    He complained about the lighting at his rally? And his drones cheered?! Seriously?!

    • @davidh6961
      @davidh6961 Před 5 lety +6

      To be fair, the lighting is pretty awkward at 6:45. It makes it look like the crowd look photoshopped.

    • @IAmSuzyQ
      @IAmSuzyQ Před 5 lety +44

      They cheer for everything he does and says. It's kinda bizarre

    • @telectronix1368
      @telectronix1368 Před 5 lety +15

      This was at a rally last year:
      "I...am going to re-open NASA!"
      And the crowd cheered.

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +1

      As a heart attack

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +3

      @@davidh6961 well now there is photo shop possibility, and canned laughter as they used to have on TV shows! You never know what this crackpot

  • @dianeromero6267
    @dianeromero6267 Před 5 lety +151

    Stephen Colbert’s delivery and performance is impeccable 👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼

    • @noluthando6757
      @noluthando6757 Před 5 lety

      It is!!

    • @integral
      @integral Před 5 lety +2

      @alexdapostman Love dopey trolls like this with their oddly capitalized copy and paste jobs, desperately hoping someone will buy the shit they're selling. Speaking as a CA resident, "Alex", your idea about the state comes from one of your below the belt bodily orifices.

    • @operationgnp
      @operationgnp Před 5 lety

      @alexdapostman you're a joke, cling to your cut and paste for dear life. cali is rad, dont speak for shit you know nothing of but what you are fed. lifelong resident, come out and I'll show you what we think of your kind.

  • @edmonix6457
    @edmonix6457 Před 5 lety +48

    Obstrucion Junction Our Democracy doesn't function ROFL Colbert hit the nail on his head

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +1

      Ditto! hilarious wasn't it?

    • @edmonix6457
      @edmonix6457 Před 5 lety +1

      @@ramonascott-kemp4799 Lol whoever coined that metaphor "Genius"

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety

      @@edmonix6457 ❓❓ dunno, my late husband had a genius IQ, but it took a while for me to teach how to get in out of the rain😏 In 1982 he was calling for our near 4-yr old in the house for dinner, kids played outside back then safe riding their bikes - on the OTHER side of the subdivision. Parents looked out for each other's kids after work/daycare. Husband said it would be great if someone could invent a little booster type thing for kids to wear around their necks & parents could send a beeping signal to get your butt home! 🤔 I'm thinking, okay you work for Scientific Atlanta - you invent one. First pagers were invented around the late 40s & by 1990, pagers were able to signal at longer range & they were sold in the millions. I wish he had advanced the pager further! Dear Lord in heaven some of the idea$ he would come up with.

    • @edmonix6457
      @edmonix6457 Před 5 lety +1

      @@ramonascott-kemp4799 I think it's still pretty safe to ride your bike out in suburban area's, there's still alot of good people out their but the bad ones seem to stand out more in peoples minds I think if that was invented back when inventions like mobiles would be really old news now, I honestly think where moving way too fast technologically and we have no idea, People see social media as empowerment tools they can be used for such purpose but I truly think their a high form of control.

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety

      @@edmonix6457 Ed, I agree with you pretty much with the exception of it's safe for kids.(they're not riding bicycles anymore, they should be!) It didn't happen riding a bicycle it happened in a church so? There you go. Regardless this woman was forewarned she was told "there's something wrong with this man don't let this child go with him..." She's an idiot and even defied a woman in psychiatric nursing who said the same & more "if that were my child I wouldn't let him go something's not right with this man." Well we live we & learn but I'd much rather not learn at the expense of little children whatever the lesson is. As for my late husband and technology yes, I think there's something to what you have said here. Perhaps we have gone too far, but just as I believe regarding the working force of America and the number of hours families are split apart I think that's a design definitely by our government. So you could be on to something else. Same players somewhat of a different game.
      Sex offenders:
      The one thing I don't like about the sex offenders list - if you look it up on the Internet to get the names/addresses in your neighborhood, it list the people as a sex offender may give their picture but it doesn't give up front, what the offense is. I think it's imperative for people to look at the "second page" per se. In my neighborhood what I've have found is mostly a 19 year old boy with a seventeen-year-old girl or 16 year old girl. In my day that wasn't a big deal. Most of the seniors when I was a freshman had already turned 19 and I was only 14, not supposed to be dating. He was an Adonis my mother thought so, Daddy saw his aptitude to get out of the coal mines but I didn't see anything. 😉 Seriously though, when it comes to sex offenders read the charges against them and it's something stupid, it's something like getting drunk passing out in the park and waking up and relieving oneself - not realizing there's a kid around. Yeah and these people have to live with this the rest of their lives or some of them don't - they just go ahead and kill themselves because they can't live with it they can't live in peace, because any time a kid goes missing the law is banging on their door probable cause we're coming to get you buddy! I think we could and should do better. I think most of the really terrible offenses against children those people haven't been caught said they're out there doing their thing. I know the incident I spoke of that little boy was only around 8 years old, he didn't talk about it until he was 17 and no one had reported anything against this stupid SBC minister. Nobody had to tell me who the perpetrator was when it all came to light either because I knew exactly! I told that mother I held her responsible because she had warning from two adults who didn't live in fairytale Land! Don't know where the pervert is today, can't find him but the little boy is dead he didn't make it past 20, car accident. However his life he was getting back on track with the right kind of help/college, fantastic career plan and the right kind of support after he told the psychiatrist. What he didn't know was the psychiatrist was going to have to tell his mother and daddy & legally report the SOB. These kids have hell from molestation like this, especially I think it's probably worse when it's a male on a young boy, because if that child is heterosexual and there's all kinds of things going through their brain trying to prove they're not gay.unfortunately they do some pretty crazy things trying to prove it to themselves. Is pretty sad. It wouldn't matter to me if they were, gay - I won't discriminate against somebody LGBT, because I think they're born that way. Have I always had that attitude? No, I've always been curious because of the number of people - genealogy now that makes you wonder. That has to speak volumes, at least it does to me. So anyway what you said here has me thinking and I think very odd that you and I agree on anyting but as I tried to tell you once before we saw more eye to eye than you wanted to realize.🤔 I'm a thinking, analytical person research analysts always are we're just curious about everything. It doesn't matter the subject, if you're a good research analyst you can research just about anything if you have the right resources. Good evening!

  • @matthewpool6508
    @matthewpool6508 Před 5 lety +141

    I'm pretty sure Ben Carson is constantly doped up on ambien.

    • @bpmrox
      @bpmrox Před 5 lety +6

      He and Trump have the same dealer... they get the Russian stuff, it's much better than local.

    • @storytel27
      @storytel27 Před 5 lety +1

      Matthew Pool 😂😂

    • @comanchio1976
      @comanchio1976 Před 5 lety +7

      Matthew Pool Either that or he's lobotomized himself
      What else could possibly explain someone going from being, an *actual* brain surgeon - to a person who never quite seems to even know where he is, from one moment to the next!?
      It's really bizarre

    • @zeusmasterson4117
      @zeusmasterson4117 Před 5 lety +5

      comanchio1976 My husband thinks it’s Xanax. I’m not sure, but something is definitely wrong. That dude’s not all there.

    • @coldwinter5710
      @coldwinter5710 Před 5 lety

      Does anyone actually know why he no longer practices medicine or has anything to do with the medical community? I understand being a surgeon is extremely stressful, so leaving that role "might" make sense, but leaving medicine entirely...what's up with that?

  • @garysinnott340
    @garysinnott340 Před 5 lety +340

    Says Don the con: _"...kept more promises than we've even made."_
    I think he meant "spent more money than I've ever had."

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +4

      That's hilarious, but true!

    • @jiv32
      @jiv32 Před 5 lety +3

      You mean "lost more money than any of us will ever make"?

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +1

      @@jiv32 oh I love it how you make me laugh! I've lost a lot of money in my life but not in the billions I think it was hard on me losing the amount I did but oh dear God when I think about how much it would be worth that's a different story that's when I get sick but h money is not everything. Grandkids are! Especially when they're graduating with honors and already taking college courses yeah that's awesome!

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety

      @@jiv32 but both too jv, I mean all those promises he made at the altar when he married those three chicks! If this one don't stick with him, I don't think he has a chance of getting another one. Melania be like gone b-bye Felicia!

    • @catprowlin3451
      @catprowlin3451 Před 5 lety +2

      @@ramonascott-kemp4799 But he'll still have the body-double. Just pay her $140K not to tell people...

  • @jomw5386
    @jomw5386 Před 5 lety +208

    Trumpets will cheer for anything! Trump:turn off the lights"
    Trumpets:yeeeeeeeeeeeees!

    • @TonytheTono
      @TonytheTono Před 5 lety +11

      I've always wondered how many are paid to be there and cheer at anything.

    • @e-manr.486
      @e-manr.486 Před 5 lety +11

      I was wondering if anyone else thought that seemed stupid too?

    • @ekibirigeable
      @ekibirigeable Před 5 lety +5

      @@e-manr.486 I did!

    • @colleen3107
      @colleen3107 Před 5 lety +3

      @john musau ~ he was having difficulty reading his TelePrompTers.

    • @ricktd6891
      @ricktd6891 Před 5 lety +2

      Trump haters are too stupid to realize catastrophic anthropogenic global warming is a scam. What a bunch of morons !!!

  • @rubyking3948
    @rubyking3948 Před 5 lety +95

    *You people ever wondered how many brains has Ben Carson operated on?*

    • @QueenBee-gx4rp
      @QueenBee-gx4rp Před 5 lety +10

      Ruby King The thought is terrifying! 🧠 He probably forgot to put them back in!

    • @toddvandell85
      @toddvandell85 Před 5 lety +4

      @Ruby King
      No. Too scary to think about. How that blithering idiot became a neurosurgeon is beyond my ability to comprehend.

    • @toddvandell85
      @toddvandell85 Před 5 lety +2

      @@QueenBee-gx4rp LMAO well said. That was funny.
      😂😂😂

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety

      Ruby King - Do you know the exact number? I think he was assisted and greatly assisted and he was given credit. Seriously if you know the exact, holla!

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety

      @Delroy Brown ditto

  • @thecelticcrone7927
    @thecelticcrone7927 Před 5 lety +8

    Being Disabled & On HUD Assistance, Carson SCARES TF OUT OF ME!!!

  • @janicek9399
    @janicek9399 Před 5 lety +36

    Lol Ben Carson hasn’t learned a thing 🤣🤣🤣😳😳😳

  • @lorielovesbooks7315
    @lorielovesbooks7315 Před 5 lety +190

    He really hoped it would be a question about a 🍪 cookie.

    • @thomastaylor.9640
      @thomastaylor.9640 Před 5 lety +2

      I like mine with milk 😁

    • @trueconservative6288
      @trueconservative6288 Před 5 lety +2

      Mohammed Ismail really? with that name of yours...

    • @atimnie
      @atimnie Před 5 lety

      I was going to comment on how Benny is even stupider than Chump, then along comes Mo to prove he's stupider than both of them.

  • @TieflingKumasi
    @TieflingKumasi Před 5 lety +85

    “The artificial not sun”
    You… you mean the lights… right?
    Right…?

    • @TieflingKumasi
      @TieflingKumasi Před 5 lety +7

      @Duribethin I'd believe that if he wasn't already completely stupid

  • @tweaker1bms
    @tweaker1bms Před 5 lety +3

    Poor Ben Carson, never got his chance to answer: "An Oreo? Of course I know what that is, I've been called one my entire life!" >.

  • @yelena5228
    @yelena5228 Před 5 lety +50

    For HUD Secretary not to know what is an REO is like for a brain surgeon not to know what is a scalpel.
    This reminds me of a saying: "The Circus may have left the town, but the Clown has stayed behind."

    • @tthappyrock368
      @tthappyrock368 Před 5 lety +3

      Given his horrible performance at his current job, it is scary to think he was allowed to operate on people's brains!

    • @spammyhell6566
      @spammyhell6566 Před 5 lety +1

      @David Coursen ~ Troll. All you're doing is posting divisive crap that's barely even related to the topic you're replying to. Move along, your idiotic hateful non sequiturs are not welcome here.

  • @renegade5130
    @renegade5130 Před 5 lety +165

    The thought of Ben Carson cutting into someone's brain is absolutely horrifying

    • @BBAKER22
      @BBAKER22 Před 5 lety +1

      Why are you STILL alive?

    • @tlclandscaping8455
      @tlclandscaping8455 Před 5 lety

      Ben Carson only operates on Democrats, they are brainless. They are electing trump 2020

    • @Thebobbyman
      @Thebobbyman Před 5 lety +7

      TLC Landscaping yeah and Ben seems to be doing so good at HUD right?

    • @bra-balllegend3940
      @bra-balllegend3940 Před 5 lety +6

      @@tlclandscaping8455 Our HUD head would know the difference between REOs and sandwich cookies.

    • @Bill_Garthright
      @Bill_Garthright Před 5 lety +10

      @Anne Day
      _I don't relate his surgical skills to his ridiculous political beliefs_
      Maybe, but who said anything about his political beliefs? Yeah, his political beliefs are crazy, but the issue is that Carson seems to be dumber than a trump. Remember his explanation for the pyramids? How they were used to store grain? Or his claim that 'scientists' explained the pyramids by saying that aliens built them? Heh, heh.
      It's not just one thing, either. He demonstrates his ignorance and his stupidity constantly (most notably by supporting Trump, true, but that's not the only way). And now he's demonstrating that he hasn't learned _anything_ from supposedly being in charge of HUD! I'll bet the janitor there knows more about this stuff than he does.
      I don't know about his surgical skills, but I've _never_ heard Ben Carson say anything that sounded intelligent _or_ informed.

  • @robertmenegazzi7290
    @robertmenegazzi7290 Před 5 lety +40

    Well there's one thing this administration has taught me: the only thing rich people can run - are their mouths.
    and debt.

  • @clar5316
    @clar5316 Před 5 lety +2

    Ben Carson always looks like he’s hoping the teacher doesn’t ask him

  • @dedicateddemocrat7409
    @dedicateddemocrat7409 Před 5 lety +391

    We all know how ROACHES HATE LIGHT!!!😂😏

    • @catladymb1864
      @catladymb1864 Před 5 lety +14

      EXCELLENT!

    • @BBAKER22
      @BBAKER22 Před 5 lety +2

      PLEASE DON'T put YOURSELF DOWN like that

    • @timothykozlowski2732
      @timothykozlowski2732 Před 5 lety

      That's why you only see Democrats at night

    • @Amilakasun1
      @Amilakasun1 Před 5 lety

      @@1028641 Are you still crying libtard?

    • @cowboybob7093
      @cowboybob7093 Před 5 lety +5

      10:57 "I'm not a rocket surgeon, I'm a brain surgeon"
      FFS, why didn't they put him in charge of HHS or something?
      *I JUST FIGURED IT OUT*
      _"We are going to hire only the best people" - and put them in positions of authority where they have no experience._

  • @paulramos4037
    @paulramos4037 Před 5 lety +295

    In fairness to Richard Nixon, he had an iota of decency to do the most patriotic thing....resigned and left office.

    • @alainarchambault2331
      @alainarchambault2331 Před 5 lety +13

      projects.fivethirtyeight.com/trump-approval-ratings/
      Nixon's approval ratings were even higher at the time too.

    • @retnavybrat
      @retnavybrat Před 5 lety +15

      He only did that because the House was getting ready to impeach his posterior.

    • @IAmSuzyQ
      @IAmSuzyQ Před 5 lety +25

      We'll have to physically pick trump up and toss his ass out of office. There's no way he'll leave voluntarily, he'll duct tape himself to the resolute desk.

    • @person-xd3wb
      @person-xd3wb Před 5 lety +12

      Nixon was power hungry, but had some respect for the constitution. Trump has no respect for the constitution and is concerned about himself.

    • @goirish2816
      @goirish2816 Před 5 lety +15

      Relax big guy. If he didn't resign, the Senate would have convicted and the Justice Department would have prosecuted. He resigned for self preservation. There was nothing honorable about Tricky Dick.

  • @koninakonan1078
    @koninakonan1078 Před 5 lety +34

    My memory isn’t what it used to be, BUT I finally remembered the name of the 1st “stable” genius - Francis the talking mule and Mr Ed

    • @felixmadison5736
      @felixmadison5736 Před 5 lety +3

      That mule and that horse were so much smarter and so much more well spoken than Trump.

    • @briagolden1
      @briagolden1 Před 5 lety

      😂😂😂😂

  • @inquiz-ahteev
    @inquiz-ahteev Před 5 lety +9

    "A putin appointed president"!!
    Truer words have not been spoken!! (from Stephen Colbert in the last minute) 💘 you Mr. Colbert

  • @TheKrazeeLadee
    @TheKrazeeLadee Před 5 lety +9

    Jon's face, I'll never get over his reactions 🤣🤣🤣

  • @taemanai5887
    @taemanai5887 Před 5 lety +273

    Garland's jobs satisfaction just jumped up a thousand percent

    • @coldwinter5710
      @coldwinter5710 Před 5 lety +11

      SWEET SWEET JUSTICE! (We can only hope he does not find reason to recuse himself. But you know someone will certainly try)...

    • @Noises
      @Noises Před 5 lety +9

      karma's not a bitch. It's a mirror.

    • @mrsslop922
      @mrsslop922 Před 5 lety +3

      Cold Winter Barr didn’t.

    • @coldwinter5710
      @coldwinter5710 Před 5 lety +1

      @@mrsslop922 Pls clarify...

    • @mrsslop922
      @mrsslop922 Před 5 lety +5

      Cold Winter Barr didn’t recuse himself from Mueller investigation. Instead he stopped it, lied about it, now keeping it in it’s fullness from Congress.

  • @RebeccaKatsuya
    @RebeccaKatsuya Před 5 lety +31

    Genuine question; is Ben Carson still a neurosurgeon?
    I can't imagine a more terrifying prospect if you had to have brain surgery than being introduced to Ben Carson as your surgeon.

    • @pdoylemi
      @pdoylemi Před 5 lety +3

      I think if that happened, I would get a book about how to do the surgery I need and hire a good sushi chef to do it. Better odds.

    • @toddvandell85
      @toddvandell85 Před 5 lety +5

      @Rebecca Panayi-Sjotun
      Conversation would sound something like this:
      "So, who wil be doing my brain surgery today?"
      "Dr. Ben Carson."
      "You know what?
      I'm good.
      I have a hacksaw with an only slightly rusty blade, and some local anesthetic at home.
      I think I'll take my chances and do my brain surgery on myself.
      A little DIMy.
      At least then I have a chance at, you know, possibly not dying."

    • @RebeccaKatsuya
      @RebeccaKatsuya Před 5 lety +2

      These replies! 😂 I'm in bits 🤣

  • @TritiumCupcakes
    @TritiumCupcakes Před 5 lety +37

    Like seriously, someone should investigate how Ben Carson made it through med school... this is utterly embarrassing, even past the level of normal Trumphian incompetence

  • @Jenn12141983
    @Jenn12141983 Před 5 lety +117

    I swear every time I hear Drumpf speak, my IQ drops 50 points. Ben Carson isn’t much better 😭

    • @Amilakasun1
      @Amilakasun1 Před 5 lety +2

      So your IQ is in negative. I can't believe libtards having IQ above 50.

    • @jaydenarevalo1831
      @jaydenarevalo1831 Před 5 lety

      How can you type tho?

    • @midwestkatie8068
      @midwestkatie8068 Před 5 lety

      but then Ds ask questions or explain that inform, so it more than balances it out. we have some smart ppl in Congress.

    • @c.a.g.3130
      @c.a.g.3130 Před 2 lety

      Was yer IQ ever as HI as 50?

    • @Jenn12141983
      @Jenn12141983 Před 2 lety +1

      @@c.a.g.3130 *your

  • @AndiDuck
    @AndiDuck Před 5 lety +80

    Q: How do you hide something from a Trump appointed Rep ?
    A: Put it in a textbook. (>ლ)

    • @swiley223
      @swiley223 Před 5 lety +4

      Or apparently send you memos and call him about it and have his staff informed and give him a year to get up to speed. Ben's a busy guy! The furniture budget isn't going to exceed itself!

    • @ricktd6891
      @ricktd6891 Před 5 lety

      How do you hide the fact that catastrophic anthropogenic global warming is a scam from Trump haters ? You brainwash sheeple that are too stupid to read a book, search a claim, check a "fact" or research anything.

  • @toddvandell85
    @toddvandell85 Před 5 lety +35

    Ben Carson:
    Proving every day that you don't have to actually be a brain surgeon to be a brain surgeon. Apparently.

    • @hugolalumiere9992
      @hugolalumiere9992 Před 5 lety +2

      He wouldn't be the first politician to be undeserving of his credentials. Problem is, the GOP seems to have gathered all those they could find under one risibly incompetent administration. U.S. Government is a circus right now and almost everybody is playing along because of... money.

    • @Nippleless_Cage
      @Nippleless_Cage Před 3 lety

      The first brain surgeon ever to be born without a brain.

  • @Straight2TheHeart
    @Straight2TheHeart Před 5 lety +4

    Every time I get a little bit depressed, I take a look at the funny things that happen inside the US government.
    Sucks to be you...
    Greetings from Germany

    • @erinduncan8833
      @erinduncan8833 Před 5 lety

      We like to keep the world entertained. However, this isn't funny. It's just really, really sad.

  • @mcnudde
    @mcnudde Před 5 lety +33

    11:17 "Oreos? Yes, I have two of them just before nap time. ZZZZZZZZZZ...."

  • @terryg4415
    @terryg4415 Před 5 lety +8

    “We’ve kept more promises than we even made.” I almost choked I laughed so hard.

  • @kathrynstewart4927
    @kathrynstewart4927 Před 5 lety +8

    Damn. He actually at one point was a brilliant brain surgeon. WTH happened? Did we somehow swap out alternate universe versions?

  • @charmainethomas984
    @charmainethomas984 Před 5 lety +2

    Oh my goodness I just screamed at Ben Carson response "An Oreo"

  • @maskedmarvyl4774
    @maskedmarvyl4774 Před 5 lety +25

    He actually asked the first woman if she was talking about Amway; then he asked the second woman if she was talking about Oreos....
    And this narcoleptic zombie is in charge of a department that affects millions of lives....

  • @youreg
    @youreg Před 5 lety +161

    "We like the sun..."
    Yeah, we remember that one time you insisted on staring at an eclipse trying to find it behind that pesky moon

    • @bethh.6455
      @bethh.6455 Před 5 lety +3

      If only the sun had burned out his eyes

    • @Reidang
      @Reidang Před 5 lety

      @Dak Lamerbusch how do you know it didnt?

    • @geterpriffin
      @geterpriffin Před 5 lety +7

      I didn't blind him. It went straight through his eyes to burn his brain, except it went straight through again because the guy doesn't have a brain.

    • @deenormus1975
      @deenormus1975 Před 5 lety +6

      youreg: “trying to find it behind that pesky moon” is a hilarious thing to say and I applaud ur Trump condescension😏🤩

    • @youreg
      @youreg Před 5 lety +2

      @@deenormus1975 You're too kind 😳

  • @delphi-moochymaker62
    @delphi-moochymaker62 Před 5 lety +67

    Carson has AMWAY and Oreos for everyone! The right sees things like this and thinks..."he's the best man for the job!"

  • @JaiRemi
    @JaiRemi Před 5 lety +14

    I love the Obstruction Junction song. So Brilliant!

  • @natashaestes154
    @natashaestes154 Před 5 lety +48

    Didn't Ben Carson say the pyramids were built by Joseph & the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat folks to store grain? 🤣

    • @therongentille4412
      @therongentille4412 Před 5 lety +5

      Sigh* yes.........

    • @brittanycrawford731
      @brittanycrawford731 Před 5 lety +6

      Natasha Estes yep and he doesn’t answer to his own name to be called into a stage and he randomly runs off mid-conversation & tv interviews yelling, “ oh my laundry!” While chasing cars passing by-he needs laundry he knows that one and Oreos from amway

    • @buddhafyre
      @buddhafyre Před 5 lety +1

      Oh god, the pyramid-grain silo theory.... Started by 'OXYcontin!! , What a' Rush Limbaugh

  • @DavidJ222
    @DavidJ222 Před 5 lety +147

    I bet Mitch "the turtle" McConnell choked on a piece of lettuce when he found out that Trump's records were in Merrick Garland's hands.😄
    Rumor has it that Judge Garland was laughing so hard, that he fell backwards out of his chair when Trump's case landed in his court. 😄

    • @Ottts22
      @Ottts22 Před 5 lety +16

      Mitch the turtle choked on a piece of lettuce LOL

    • @JSkyGemini
      @JSkyGemini Před 5 lety +13

      I would've fallen out of my chair too, I'm still laughing, actually. 😅😅😅 Priceless.

  • @bunchoffuckingbullshit5482
    @bunchoffuckingbullshit5482 Před 5 lety +20

    Sweet Jesus. If Ben Carson was a brain surgeon, then I'm Secretariat !!!

    • @slowmotion40
      @slowmotion40 Před 5 lety +1

      I also found it hard to believe that a black person could be a surgeon. After I thought about it though, I realized I was a racist piece of shit.

    • @macforme
      @macforme Před 5 lety

      In that case, Bunch, you might like some oats.... because he was a brain surgeon.

    • @MissQiChu
      @MissQiChu Před 5 lety

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @godinezfer1906
    @godinezfer1906 Před 5 lety +5

    Trumps biggest fights: Obama, Windmills, Lights 😂

    • @ingerabrams4569
      @ingerabrams4569 Před 5 lety +1

      Umbrellas, raking the forest, rolls of paper towels,

  • @alexandercampbell7903
    @alexandercampbell7903 Před 5 lety +44

    Secretary Of HUD Ben Carson AND "Why You Don't Take Medication While Operating Heavy Machinery"

    • @kitcobain444
      @kitcobain444 Před 5 lety +2

      LOL, like what, his pen? That mic? I agree with you 100%!!! :-)

  • @o.b.7217
    @o.b.7217 Před 5 lety +47

    (1:45) "...my defrosted head stitched onto a gorilla's body...we wear the same suit size"
    Oh Stephen...how could you not say _"stitched onto an _*_orangutan's_*_ body"_ ...that joke practically wrote itself.

    • @Hexanitrobenzene
      @Hexanitrobenzene Před 5 lety

      It has something to do with the joke being Bill Maher's, I guess...

    • @o.b.7217
      @o.b.7217 Před 5 lety

      @@Hexanitrobenzene "...the joke being Bill Maher's..."
      ---
      And for all who missed it: czcams.com/video/WdEiCGyLlGk/video.html 😂

    • @TysonJensen
      @TysonJensen Před 5 lety

      Donald is shaped like a gorilla except sculpted in lard instead of muscle. He is not shaped like an orangutan, even if his coloring suggests perhaps a desire to become one someday.

  • @AH-cy4md
    @AH-cy4md Před 5 lety +142

    🤮ugh.....the clips from his rallies are soooo painful 🤪🤢🤮

    • @margaretdimick2096
      @margaretdimick2096 Před 5 lety +19

      And the idiots in the crowd eat it right up.

    • @michaedove3562
      @michaedove3562 Před 5 lety +14

      I have numerous friends from college that have gone to them and were proud of it and saw nothing wrong with what Trump said. True story...

    • @MsRedwiz
      @MsRedwiz Před 5 lety +6

      More and more people might go like others go to standup comedy

    • @denyze7461
      @denyze7461 Před 5 lety +6

      Hard to understand why the crowd yells and claps.
      It seems inane.

    • @margaretdimick2096
      @margaretdimick2096 Před 5 lety +4

      @@denyze7461 it's mob mentality. They follow the crowd.

  • @nurlindafsihotang49
    @nurlindafsihotang49 Před 5 lety +45

    Ain't karma a fair MITCH, eh Turtle McConnel?

  • @lostmarble540
    @lostmarble540 Před 5 lety +68

    Seriously, any civilian that defied a subpoena would get put in handcuffs. I would totally approve of giving the same treatment to trump's friends.

    • @danarzechula3769
      @danarzechula3769 Před 5 lety +1

      And all I want is the same healthcare I'm paying for my senators to get. Oh, and the inflated salary and pension. Yeah.

  • @kimberlys8422
    @kimberlys8422 Před 5 lety +221

    Yeah.. I'm voting for the democratic nominee regardless of who it is.
    _Trump has no one to blame but himself._

    • @miskatonicalumni5612
      @miskatonicalumni5612 Před 5 lety +30

      Everyone needs to!
      See what "I don't like Hillary so I'm not voting" gets you?
      "No matter who, vote Blue!"
      Catchy no?

    • @DoctorDeadbody
      @DoctorDeadbody Před 5 lety +8

      @@miskatonicalumni5612 You got it.

    • @DatBoiLui
      @DatBoiLui Před 5 lety +9

      Bernie or Bust for me, either way the Bern is gonna win so fuck it.

    • @christopherb501
      @christopherb501 Před 5 lety +11

      DO vote in the primaries, tho. I don't care to have Klobuchar or Booker, and I REALLY don't want friggin' Biden. I'll vote for him IF I MUST, but he's about as bog-standard a center-right Boomer Democrat as you could ask for.

    • @moarsaur
      @moarsaur Před 5 lety +8

      But you know, maybe you should be taking a stake in who it is, as well as who your state legislators are, and your town/city council? Decent candidates don't just magically appear at the top of the ballot. The GOP has been gaming voting districts for state offices, Congress and the Senate for decades, while Democrats just show up and vote for a president, sometimes.

  • @mpdavis731
    @mpdavis731 Před 5 lety +107

    I literally felt my IQ dropping listening to Carson... wow "Oreo?"

    • @thatjayne
      @thatjayne Před 5 lety +2

      Marshall Davis brilliant comment!! I agree.. I cringed more than I do during a Larry David Curb Your Enthusiasm Episode 🤣

    • @JC-yo5tx
      @JC-yo5tx Před 5 lety +2

      “Reclaiming my tiiime” !

    • @ramonascott-kemp4799
      @ramonascott-kemp4799 Před 5 lety +2

      Oh NO! don't let your IQ drop because of that idiot! keep it up because we need as many high IQs as we can get in 2020 cuz we've sure got some low ones running around here holler and Trump Trump Trump 😠 dump Trump in 2020!

    • @MUZENDA01
      @MUZENDA01 Před 5 lety

      Bus stop TV

    • @DonaldDump2024
      @DonaldDump2024 Před 5 lety +1

      “I will select the best”. Yeah, right. Most of trump’s first string has left after revelations of corruption and one lied to investigators. Instead of “Draining the swamp” trump is draining our coffers through corruption.

  • @pam18ram
    @pam18ram Před 5 lety +62

    CA just passed a law, in order to be on the 2020 pres ticket....you must release “tax returns” ouch🥴

    • @jelica9475
      @jelica9475 Před 5 lety +12

      49 more to go...lets UNITE!

    • @trollnerd
      @trollnerd Před 5 lety +1

      It's cute but unconstitutional

    • @geofftuckfrump9891
      @geofftuckfrump9891 Před 5 lety +9

      trollnerd So was Trump’s election.

    • @abouttogiveyasomefacts5574
      @abouttogiveyasomefacts5574 Před 5 lety +2

      trollnerd it’s not it’s just fair for Everyone to know the truth plus the house and congress are able to subpoena tax’s

    • @geofftuckfrump9891
      @geofftuckfrump9891 Před 5 lety

      Trollnerd is a low-I.Q.’d idiot with no basis on U.S. History. Every President since Nixon (not counting Ford) has shown their tax returns. Maybe Trollnerd should grow a 🧠 and learn how to read.

  • @faceoff3315
    @faceoff3315 Před 5 lety +608

    *Make America Great Again Impeach Donald J Trump* 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

    • @philnguyen712
      @philnguyen712 Před 5 lety +10

      I would love to impeach trump but then that would mean we would have to deal with Pence and in some ways he's worse. At least trump can be entertaining with his stupidity.

    • @hodaka1000
      @hodaka1000 Před 5 lety +9

      Dump the talking turd.

    • @hodaka1000
      @hodaka1000 Před 5 lety +20

      @TheTruthIsRacist
      ....a Putin appointed President!

    • @mintythebowler5113
      @mintythebowler5113 Před 5 lety

      They had us in the first half. Not gonna lie

    • @thehusketeers4319
      @thehusketeers4319 Před 5 lety +2

      Impeach - Trump wins
      Don't impeach - Trump wins

  • @jeah8259
    @jeah8259 Před 5 lety +42

    Thank you Stephen C., I can always count on you to see some humor in this mess.

  • @harrietkaufman3862
    @harrietkaufman3862 Před 5 lety +3

    If I ignored a subpoena how fast would I be in jail?

  • @ehla0144
    @ehla0144 Před 5 lety +108

    And that guy's been a neuro surgeon for real?? Did his patients really make it, at least one???

    • @toddvandell85
      @toddvandell85 Před 5 lety +8

      @ehla 01
      We will never know. He won't show his surgery records. Following his boss's lead. "No tax returns, no surgery records."

    • @gypsysummerraine4445
      @gypsysummerraine4445 Před 5 lety +11

      i know what you mean i sure wouldn't want him doing brain surgery on me he can't even do his job now

    • @ehla0144
      @ehla0144 Před 5 lety +1

      @@stevenbrock528 Hi, COMRADE. Try harder😃😃😂😎

    • @kathrynstewart4927
      @kathrynstewart4927 Před 5 lety +1

      Google 'Gifted Hands'. He was indeed at one point a miracle worker. I'm still mystified by the change. It's like he's not the same person at all. Pod person?

    • @ehla0144
      @ehla0144 Před 5 lety +1

      @@kathrynstewart4927 Movies and tv productions love to idolize people. The truth is usually different.

  • @errgag3580
    @errgag3580 Před 5 lety +127

    America, we cannot take the suspense and drama here in Canada. Send plenty more popcorn...plenty!🍺🍺🍻🍻

    • @bluesstinger1975
      @bluesstinger1975 Před 5 lety +14

      NZ is also waiting for popcorn, oh the comedy gold coming from this Government is hilarious, the only people the orange baby jailer is making happy....are the comedians

    • @kimberlys8422
      @kimberlys8422 Před 5 lety +4

      We're _"trying"_
      What did Stephen about democracy ending on a cliff-hanger?!

    • @soth1sol
      @soth1sol Před 5 lety

      what's the matter? don't have enough "made in usa" pop'd kernels of corn? probably bc it was in our best interests to embargo ourselves from selling them to you. the border is defined. our fly-over farmers come first! sorry, canadia. you snoze you loose! #MAGA

    • @miskatonicalumni5612
      @miskatonicalumni5612 Před 5 lety +7

      @Tom Towers All I can say is "Survivor: America" has to be the best reality show I've ever seen!
      Unfortunately there is no winner... 😞

    • @bedazzlejuju
      @bedazzlejuju Před 5 lety +13

      I’ll send popcorn if you send the marriage proposal so I can get out of here!

  • @omegagilgamesh
    @omegagilgamesh Před 5 lety +44

    "We've kept more promises than we even made."
    I had to rewind the part after that because I was looking around doing the exact same thing Jon Baptiste was doing, but I didn't realize it until I rewound.

    • @kathryn3950
      @kathryn3950 Před 5 lety

      omegagilgamesh he first said that in 2017, I think (tough to keep his crap straight), but I thought it was just he just misspoke.

  • @willhpc4-life249
    @willhpc4-life249 Před 5 lety +32

    The ARTIFICIAL NOT-SUN....let that sink in..President Dementia at his finest

    • @lawrenceparkmaven7411
      @lawrenceparkmaven7411 Před 5 lety

      William Martineau I heard artificial nonsense (and I’m sure he has syphyllitic dementia)

  • @mousermind
    @mousermind Před 5 lety +9

    I too am interested in the disparity in Oreo rates.

    • @tweaker1bms
      @tweaker1bms Před 5 lety

      Does that by any chance, involve the ratio of black to white stuff? :P

  • @tarrynlea
    @tarrynlea Před 5 lety +85

    Why did that guy come dressed as a Windows 95 screensaver?

    • @dilet8923
      @dilet8923 Před 5 lety +3

      he is dressed as brick wall ..got it

    • @aaronhoney2217
      @aaronhoney2217 Před 5 lety +9

      @@dilet8923 So why did he come dressed as a Castle Wolfenstein brick wall?

    • @cmdraftbrn
      @cmdraftbrn Před 5 lety +8

      because they cant handle a 64-bit OS.

    • @geraldhaynesjr1815
      @geraldhaynesjr1815 Před 5 lety +1

      Sure did. Lol lol

    • @Anthony-nv7gd
      @Anthony-nv7gd Před 5 lety +1

      Tarryn Well played. 👏🏻

  • @millertime6
    @millertime6 Před 5 lety +172

    Damn, I forgot Ben Carson was a legendary brain surgeon! You have to love how he just killed his legacy 🤦🏽‍♂️

    • @NoahG1000
      @NoahG1000 Před 5 lety +10

      “Legendary”? www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/11/ben-carson-doctor-reviews-vitals

    • @bra-balllegend3940
      @bra-balllegend3940 Před 5 lety +36

      The lobotomy he performed on himself went perfectly.

    • @deborahallen3318
      @deborahallen3318 Před 5 lety +15

      Everyone and Everything that Trump touches will die! Just look at the body count around him 😳

    • @maggierezac5820
      @maggierezac5820 Před 5 lety +3

      @@deborahallen3318 Did you know that former Repub. Rick Wilson wrote a book with that title?
      "Everything Trump Touches Dies." It help in such trying times! Peace.

    • @simonpoon3785
      @simonpoon3785 Před 5 lety +1

      Turn off the sun.how stupid can Trump be he be?

  • @coleprivott6140
    @coleprivott6140 Před 5 lety +15

    It's hard to believe Carson was a pioneering brain surgeon

    • @calvingreen7197
      @calvingreen7197 Před 5 lety +2

      Slow Motion I’m right there*... SMH, very interesting!

    • @calvingreen7197
      @calvingreen7197 Před 5 lety +2

      Slow Motion You also have an unnecessary/misplaced comma in your first sentence, but who would notice? Seriously though, if you’re going to troll, it’s best not to seem illiterate. I was being facetious with my correction, so relax. 🤭😎

  • @mlghelp2day
    @mlghelp2day Před 5 lety +177

    "Take it from me....A PUTIN APPOINTMENT PRESIDENT."
    LOL🤣😅😅

    • @GLORYNEVADASMITH
      @GLORYNEVADASMITH Před 5 lety

      Why does Putin keep getting credit for Mark Burnetts TV show ?

    • @billpool1217
      @billpool1217 Před 5 lety +3

      @Matt Nelson so you think Trump should just keep appealing until he wins, but Congress shouldn't be able to see the UNREDACTED Mueller report because.....?