The Ping Trick: How To Never Run Out Of Things To Say

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  • čas přidán 27. 05. 2024
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    We’ve all had conversations that feel forced or boring, or are filled with awkward silences. It can be almost painful. That’s why in this video we're going to go over 5 steps to make small talk with anyone. We’ll do so by breaking down some tricks that Joe Rogan uses on his podcast to connect with everyone from academics to athletes to celebrities.  
    The goal of each of these is to either get the person to like you more OR get you off small talk and into a real conversation that lets you form a genuine connection. Some will be mindsets and some will be word for word questions you can steal. They’re all easy to do, but most people don’t do them.

    ⏰TIMESTAMPS⏰ 
    0:00 - Intro.
    0:54 - #1: Grease the wheels early with a compliment.
    2:17 - #2: Transition between topics using “reminds me of” thinking.
    4:07 - #3: Ping for topics of mutual interest.
    4:31 - #4: Get other people excited about the conversation.
    6:27 - #5: Create a connection with people while listening.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    #JoeRogan #JRE #CharismaOnCommand
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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  • Jak na to + styl

Komentáře • 4,4K

  • @henrytheninja1163
    @henrytheninja1163 Před 3 lety +15206

    Him: how old are you
    Her: I’m 22
    Him: why?

  • @averagedan4
    @averagedan4 Před 3 lety +17828

    Me re-learning social skills after spending a year inside

  • @winstonzeb2842
    @winstonzeb2842 Před rokem +1253

    The more confident you are the less you worry about awkward moments. If theres a pause in a conversation, just let it ride out and chill in the silence. You don’t have to feel awkward about it, its not your job to defend all awkward moments from happening, instead just refuse to acknowledge that its “awkward “

    • @angelapileggi6031
      @angelapileggi6031 Před rokem +22

      I agree with that completely, the first step to something becoming awkward is giving it any focus. That scene in Pulp Fiction between John Travolta and Uma Thurman comes to mind regarding how to handle the breaks of silence, lol.

    • @SierraHanna-qv4bm
      @SierraHanna-qv4bm Před rokem +11

      But what to do in that silence? When you both are sitting together and eun out of things to say and you have nothing else to do, what to do? I start fiddling with my hands and look around

    • @fang.clarkec7584
      @fang.clarkec7584 Před rokem +8

      I wish I thought that on my last date

    • @maxpayne4129
      @maxpayne4129 Před 10 měsíci +8

      ​@@SierraHanna-qv4bmPick up a guitar

    • @ithought09
      @ithought09 Před 10 měsíci

      @@maxpayne4129HOLY REALLL

  • @sycadelic666
    @sycadelic666 Před rokem +236

    A huge part of small talk is being genuinely interested in the conversation, with whomever it may be.

  • @QuestionEverythingButWHY
    @QuestionEverythingButWHY Před 3 lety +6589

    “Talk to someone about themselves and they'll listen for hours.”
    ― Dale Carnegie

    • @AxxLAfriku
      @AxxLAfriku Před 3 lety +15

      im famous

    • @rrrealqueen
      @rrrealqueen Před 3 lety +34

      I'm FBI open up

    • @thuylevan195
      @thuylevan195 Před 3 lety +88

      I find it not correct in many cases

    • @captlanc
      @captlanc Před 3 lety +228

      Unless they are uncomfortable with it. Quotes just sound cool. Easily refutable.

    • @orakatokansek
      @orakatokansek Před 3 lety +19

      @@captlanc well, since its work to majority, why you care to the minority?

  • @Wil_Dasovich
    @Wil_Dasovich Před 3 lety +19558

    This was helpful, I forgot how to socialize after 2020

  • @XxSomeDooshxX
    @XxSomeDooshxX Před rokem +87

    "Joe asks questions which are fun to answer, for example-"
    *Ad starts*
    "Wanna watch meerkats without interruptions?"
    This is single handedly the most useful episode I've watched, thanks guys

  • @frankstared
    @frankstared Před rokem +97

    'What does this remind me of?' is an excellent authentic approach to continuing a conversation with others you may not have much in common with. That being said, it is also important to drop the conversation when it gets stale or if you hit awkward or unwelcome territory.

    • @ricardocortes7088
      @ricardocortes7088 Před 19 dny

      You bail out of every conversation as soon as it gets stale? lol silence is okay sometimes. You gotta be comfortable with yourself, no conversation is going to be 100% perfect every time

  • @greveeen
    @greveeen Před 3 lety +8077

    Joe: How old are you?
    Guest: 35
    Joe: I first did DMT when I was 35

    • @davyddocarmocabral2989
      @davyddocarmocabral2989 Před 3 lety +429

      35? No really, that's the number of alkaloids in my favorite cannabis strain

    • @yasinruhulla372
      @yasinruhulla372 Před 3 lety +153

      Great convo starter if your really think about it LMAO

    • @Florafauna564
      @Florafauna564 Před 3 lety +1

      😂

    • @Sanozucke
      @Sanozucke Před 3 lety +53

      @@davyddocarmocabral2989 Cannabis, what a great plant, isn't it? Actually you can make cloth with it.

    • @MrChrisdavonbrown
      @MrChrisdavonbrown Před 3 lety +1

      😂😂😂😂

  • @Jibba
    @Jibba Před 3 lety +3754

    In the middle of a conversation
    *Pulls out note cards*

  • @jacktupp4358
    @jacktupp4358 Před rokem +26

    The power of language and expression is incredible. I wish I'd have realized when I was younger how much I absolutely love the dynamic of communication, both verbal and non-verbal and all of the various nuance related to each. It's one of the first things people noticed as we shifted towards more written communication (Email, Text, Comments) that there's no real, for example, sarcasm font. Compared to verbal communication, with tone, inflection, and accompanying mannerisms like a smirk or tilt of the head, written communication is just flat.

  • @7justin34
    @7justin34 Před rokem +191

    Things I learned from this video:
    1.) Asking why might be annoying, but is the best way to get the root of the subject and have an interesting conversation.
    2.) Laughing is the best way to lighten the mood and take the awkwardness out of the picture.
    3.) Compliments are the best way to start a conversation.

    • @claudrebille178
      @claudrebille178 Před 6 měsíci

      Problem is the guy is trying to sell his programme

  • @CaseyBurnsInvesting
    @CaseyBurnsInvesting Před 3 lety +4102

    We all want to feel funny, valued, and loved.

  • @gezzapk
    @gezzapk Před 3 lety +5706

    Her: Hi
    Him: Hi, nice hair.
    Her Thanks
    Him: My back hair reminds me of Khabib Nurmagomedov.
    Her: Anyway, have a nice day.

  • @Tr1Hard777
    @Tr1Hard777 Před 2 lety +14

    Something I've found as well is if I'm talking to someone and feel awkward it's often them not being good with small talk and you end up feeling like you did something wrong.

  • @gpheonix1
    @gpheonix1 Před rokem +220

    Thank you for providing me the tools on how to make a conversation awkward for others and keep it that way.

    • @bw8476
      @bw8476 Před 10 měsíci +5

      😄
      there's definitely some people that this can be applied to in reverse to counter overreaching liberties.

    • @user-yl1ko7sg6t
      @user-yl1ko7sg6t Před 5 měsíci

      This is normal socializing . Just make sure you do active listening . People are all interesting and have a treasure chest experience . Just listening and respond appropriately

  • @LBYINCHINA
    @LBYINCHINA Před 3 lety +5111

    1. Grease the wheel early with a compliment.
    2. Transition between topics using "reminds me of" thinking.
    3. Ping for topics of mutual interest.
    4. Get other people excited about the conversation.
    5. Create a connection with people while listening.

    • @SmeeGuitar
      @SmeeGuitar Před 3 lety +333

      6. Mention DMT and the snake goddess

    • @bhe8336
      @bhe8336 Před 3 lety +36

      Too much work.

    • @mugiwaryanoaden2429
      @mugiwaryanoaden2429 Před 3 lety +147

      Everything time I come to the comments and find someone who summarizes the video in to something very is to take in, i just smile with my whole body. thanks man ur awesome !

    • @furyberserk
      @furyberserk Před 2 lety +7

      @@bhe8336
      Ask interesting why questions of their choice.

    • @OriginalKingRichTv
      @OriginalKingRichTv Před 2 lety +6

      @@furyberserk that made no sense

  • @KastaRules
    @KastaRules Před 3 lety +2268

    I used to be awkward around strangers. 10 years as a butcher made me the KING of small talk though.
    I could entertain everyone and their grandmother. They call me the BUTCHER CLOWN now.

    • @phoneguy3409
      @phoneguy3409 Před 3 lety +391

      Should I be calling the cops?

    • @stevetheiii477
      @stevetheiii477 Před 3 lety +204

      i don't know how to interpret this comment....

    • @leonflorence118
      @leonflorence118 Před 3 lety +176

      That sounds straight out of a horror movie

    • @thairinkhudr4259
      @thairinkhudr4259 Před 3 lety +44

      That must mean you're interesting and funny even when you were introverted, it was just because you didn't connect with people much at the time. Inspirational!

    • @justinfernandez9876
      @justinfernandez9876 Před 3 lety +93

      that's a great serial killer name congrats bro

  • @Leoppassion
    @Leoppassion Před rokem +10

    This is literally all what I do during my part time as an english speaking teacher in korea.
    "Why" can be powerful, but don't abuse it. It can become a bit interrogative.
    Creating a scenario is a good one. Ask "what if" questions. It gives a framework for both parties to create something together.

  • @zanedemir1369
    @zanedemir1369 Před 2 lety +8

    I honestly think one of there most underrated parts of this channel is there use of caveats and not laying the situations for when you should use each of these. Really loving their stuff rn

  • @bundescoach3528
    @bundescoach3528 Před 3 lety +1338

    me at the bar after watchin this video:
    "so, where are you from?"
    "Melbourne."
    "Why?"

  • @Zomby
    @Zomby Před 3 lety +1425

    I just realized my social anxiety is so bad that I willfully watched a video on how to talk to other people.

    • @johnwirk
      @johnwirk Před 3 lety +234

      It may not be your situation but I realized that my lack of "personality" and social anxiety came from growing up in a quiet, awkward home that never really rewarded open, charismatic behavior. I would go over to a friend's house who was very social with random strangers and his home was a talk and laugh fest. Looking back now I realize that I'm not anti-social or naturally an "introvert". It is something I learned to be through a soft oppression in my home.

    • @YogawithAliBeale
      @YogawithAliBeale Před 3 lety +6

      Try to find comfort in you are not alone. I think more people than not feel this way. This content is so binge worthy not just to learn about yourself but also understand other or make them feel more comfortable.

    • @dariomladenovski7047
      @dariomladenovski7047 Před 3 lety +12

      it's ok some people have a personality like me that don't want to talk that much but like to listen and think more and personally I don't want to be around someone who is going to talk my ear off

    • @chrisb2038
      @chrisb2038 Před 3 lety +13

      @@johnwirk wow man im in the exact same boat as you? are we just permanently boring now?

    • @ant_six
      @ant_six Před 3 lety +15

      @@chrisb2038 you’re not as boring as you think you are. Drop that mindset and you will see results! Some people just have a much richer inner world than their peers.

  • @ImCerealSuperDuperCereal

    I now watch your channel to relearn social skills after years of bipolar depression and isolation. Thank you for making these.

  • @swagdonor2357
    @swagdonor2357 Před rokem +3

    The best think I found is that everyone is interesting in their own way. You can literally talk to just about anyone. All you have to do is listen. That’s it. If you can learn to listen and comprehend which IS a skill. You’re golden

  • @MARS72JJ
    @MARS72JJ Před 3 lety +1547

    1. Grease the wheels early with a compliment. Good energy or a platonic physical compliment. Don't dwell on the compliment or it will seem fake. Make it a genuine one, something you actually think.
    2. Reminds me of thinking. Use lateral thinking to transition to something else you both can talk about. Don't know anything about baseball - talk about the atmosphere of a stadium.
    3. Pings for topics of mutual interest.
    4. Get other people excited about the conversation. Peel the onion. Absorb what is important to them from the innocuous questions. Ask questions that are fun to answer: "What do you?", followed by "Do you like it?
    5. Create a connection. Laugh easily. Don't fake it but don't restrict it. Watch something funny before you meet people.
    6. Mirroring. Makes them feel heard. Builds rapport. Stay true to yourself ultimately but repeating someone's final words at the end tells them you are listening initially.

    • @startasticalart6138
      @startasticalart6138 Před 3 lety +4

      Please make a video with Daniel Radcliffe!!!

    • @KryssN1
      @KryssN1 Před 3 lety +4

      @Vontez Just don't do it often, will make people ignore your opinion

    • @joshyjosh8817
      @joshyjosh8817 Před 3 lety +10

      Thanks for saving me 11 minutes

    • @DerMoerpler
      @DerMoerpler Před 3 lety +3

      @Vontez What Krystian Nowak said, but I'll add that you also shouldn't use self-deprication about something you're actually insecure about. People usually notice and it displays a lack of confidence.

    • @MrEysox
      @MrEysox Před 3 lety +24

      Her : My father diead yesterday
      Him : Oh your father died yesterday ?
      Her : Yes
      Him : Did you like it ?

  • @c.a.g.e.
    @c.a.g.e. Před 3 lety +2117

    Watching this realizing I do all of this while I’m drunk but am a step away from a brick wall when I’m sober

    • @tjblackmore3247
      @tjblackmore3247 Před 3 lety +97

      This is spot on 🤣🤣🤣

    • @seanbuckley924
      @seanbuckley924 Před 3 lety +49

      This couldn’t be more accurate^^^

    • @TheRainbowDragicorn
      @TheRainbowDragicorn Před 3 lety +108

      This is how alcoholics are born 💁🏻‍♂️

    • @tjblackmore3247
      @tjblackmore3247 Před 3 lety +59

      @@TheRainbowDragicorn I bet you’re really fun at parties

    • @mthotdog
      @mthotdog Před 3 lety +38

      I mean this nicely, sounds like you need to get more confidence

  • @davebowden4010
    @davebowden4010 Před 2 lety +29

    Such a good instructional vid.
    Im a big fan of listening too. So many people start a subject then interject because they're really more desperate to tell you about their experience not actually hear yours .
    Nobody listens anymore. Joe nails both aspects of conversing and listening. Love the guy.

  • @4lifejeph
    @4lifejeph Před 6 měsíci +1

    I watched the bunch of these conversation videos tonight, and this one is by far the best of the bunch. He gives good clear examples to make his point.

  • @-.._.-_...-_.._-..__..._.-.-.-

    This channel should be called "How to be More Like Joe Rogan."

    • @pootisspencer5492
      @pootisspencer5492 Před 3 lety +115

      seriously. i think ive seen like 4 vids from them and every one talks about joe to some extent. it makes sense though, hes definitely charismatic and a great conversationalist

    • @diesal_one
      @diesal_one Před 3 lety +15

      And Craig Ferguson

    • @piotralanp
      @piotralanp Před 3 lety +42

      You could argue that Joe is one of the best at talking with people in the world, maybe thats why:d

    • @adonisng157
      @adonisng157 Před 3 lety +6

      Cant say that the things Joe says aren’t problematic because they often are. He’s downplayed covid, and often comes off saying his opinion without doing all the research. With so many people who listen to him and follow him, the misinformation is problematic in my opinion. For example, in this video he says he hates fake car engine noises, but oftentimes cars have fake engine noises to warn pedestrians of incoming cars and it’s been documented that cars that are too quiet pose a risk to pedestrians...he’s still a good talker, i just wish there was some disclaimer on these videos that tell you “Joe Rogan isn’t perfect, but...”

    • @ericbell217
      @ericbell217 Před 3 lety +54

      @@adonisng157you don't need a disclaimer to know he's not an expert at those things. I don't need moderation or disclaimers for individuals that take everything too seriously.

  • @aryankarcii1157
    @aryankarcii1157 Před 3 lety +620

    One of the most fulfilling things in life is a solid conversation. You feel like you accomplished something. And you have.

    • @sarahg2653
      @sarahg2653 Před 3 lety +57

      Ive never considered this. You're right. I do feel great after a successful conversation with a stranger. All my endorphins start flooding my brain and makes me feel good about myself. I struggle with speaking to people.

    • @KaRaMaNisKaRaMan
      @KaRaMaNisKaRaMan Před 3 lety

      Is it always to both people fullfilling?

    • @bhe8336
      @bhe8336 Před 3 lety +2

      It's only fulfilling because it strokes your ego. Oh someone paid attention to me look at how important I am.

    • @KaRaMaNisKaRaMan
      @KaRaMaNisKaRaMan Před 3 lety +15

      @@bhe8336 when it's fullfilling for both sides is when it's been a good conversation. I think.

    • @zbinford
      @zbinford Před 3 lety +20

      @@bhe8336 Clearly never had a good conversation with anyone 😂👌🏽

  • @XenoTravis
    @XenoTravis Před 7 měsíci +3

    After watching hours and hours and hours of podcast I could tell my conversational skills are better. People have said I am fun and not boring to talk to. I like having super long conversations now.

  • @BillStreeter
    @BillStreeter Před rokem +18

    I disagree with asking people "why" questions. It's subtly confrontational. People tend to have a visceral reaction to "why" as if they're being accused of something--it's very deep and goes back to childhood when parents would ask things like "why did you do that?!" This is not to say you can't ask that kind of question, just avoid the word "why." So change it up by asking "what made you decide to ..." or "what led you to ..."

  • @The-Seventies
    @The-Seventies Před 2 lety +3413

    I used to feel uncomfortable and insecure when I had to small talk. But one day I realized it’s not completely my job to keep the conversation going. It’s just 50/50, cause the other person has to make small talk to. Since then, I don’t feel uncomfortable when there’s is a silence in the conversation. It helped me to relax more and when you’re relaxed, small talk becomes way easier.

    • @amberslahlize7961
      @amberslahlize7961 Před 2 lety +67

      It does, but it's different when it's a talk show...or when it's one of your friends/relatives that it turns more into a monolog...or especially when you don't care about having small talk with this person...it becomes very awkward then..I don't know how these people pretend to care, or..maybe they do.

    • @moonlightfitz
      @moonlightfitz Před 2 lety

      Yep.

    • @ryandavison1637
      @ryandavison1637 Před 2 lety +55

      Silence in a public and social setting is inevitable, if it's perceived as awkward it is. I don't find silence as awkward anymore

    • @98MTBiker
      @98MTBiker Před 2 lety +80

      Seriously this is why I hate tinder. I'm happy with the matches I get but when I strike a conversation I try to say something that invokes a reply that isn't just yes or no but women find a way to always answer in a way that I'm left with the responsibility of keeping the conversation going. And honestly I don't care enough to do so. If it's a test to see if I'm funny or something like that I won't even bother passing those kinds of tests because to me it just shows they aren't willing to put any effort into it and I'm supposed to try to win them over I don't think that's how it works in the real life.

    • @amberslahlize7961
      @amberslahlize7961 Před 2 lety +13

      @@98MTBiker Yeah, in real life, there are stakes. On the internet, there are no real stakes.

  • @eattheroom8383
    @eattheroom8383 Před 3 lety +2187

    Tell people you can't do small talk. They often agree that they can't either and dive right into interesting stuff.

    • @eXebeno
      @eXebeno Před 3 lety +83

      @AggrievedCommenter huh?

    • @e_t_t9553
      @e_t_t9553 Před 3 lety +128

      cameron martin look at his username 😂.

    • @Hx3ney
      @Hx3ney Před 3 lety +39

      And if they dont agree they go away .. win win

    • @eattheroom8383
      @eattheroom8383 Před 3 lety +19

      @@Hx3ney haha true. Although if they're shy then better to switch to any option in this video to make them feel at ease. At least for a while anyway 😅

    • @lindita7745
      @lindita7745 Před 3 lety +55

      I personally love small talk, it allows you to ease into all the “interesting stuff”. I like to take my time opening up, and I need to gauge the other person before I do just that. So I rather not skip the small talk. It’s like foreplay, but for good conversations lol

  • @kylequintana
    @kylequintana Před rokem +15

    My wife is a master at small talk and I just never understood how she did it. She can keep a conversation going for hours with people. Maybe that’s just most women 🤔 . This is helpful for me because I’m an introvert, I avoid parties or places where I’d have to small talk with strangers because it’s so exhausting to me.

    • @0xsergy
      @0xsergy Před rokem +2

      Women get a lot of practice keep in mind, lots of men in the courting phase gonna small chat them up so they do get the opportunity to practice those skills. Vs men have to go out of their way to chat up women(generally, unless you're Brad Pitt)

  • @chilkootsailor492
    @chilkootsailor492 Před 7 měsíci +9

    I really appreciate your videos. As someone with mild Asperger's its frustrating recognizing how awkward a conversation is and not having the means to fix it. I'm really, really thankful for this.

  • @felipeberg8855
    @felipeberg8855 Před 3 lety +953

    This video just explained why people on weed r so nice to talk to, they laugh all the time, make crazy question and make a lot of conections between subjects.

    • @corywestfi910
      @corywestfi910 Před 3 lety +29

      Similar effect from alcohol.

    • @33Daz3
      @33Daz3 Před 3 lety +47

      I made a connection between the grocery store and a casino how with no windows it looks the same no matter what time of day it is. I made this statement to a coworker and she was just like ... ok

    • @AM-vk2yq
      @AM-vk2yq Před 3 lety +66

      Weed makes me awkward af around people

    • @ZYX884
      @ZYX884 Před 3 lety +16

      Talking to people on weed is sooo annoying, they make up nonsense that I really can't be bothered with. Waste of time

    • @HungUpOnADream1122
      @HungUpOnADream1122 Před 3 lety +9

      Me with ADHD not being able to sit on a single topic for more than 45 seconds lol

  • @terrybogard8734
    @terrybogard8734 Před 3 lety +4138

    me on a date at a restaurant: so, you like food?
    her: um yeah lol
    me: are you a foodie?
    her: not really?
    me: a fancy word for "foodie" is "epicure" which comes from the ancient Greek philosopher Epicurus...*proceeds to ramble about ancient Greek philosophy and literature for an hour* *notices she's gone; keeps going*

    • @blobbykins7281
      @blobbykins7281 Před 3 lety +96

      Edit: notices she’s gone and keeps going on about it to the whole band class

    • @sjuvanet
      @sjuvanet Před 3 lety +134

      @@blobbykins7281 please do not associate philosophy with autism. the reason why you shouldn't is because they are the same thing.

    • @blobbykins7281
      @blobbykins7281 Před 3 lety +8

      @@sjuvanet I mean but arent band kids the ones who would be getting into Ancient Greek philosophy. Or is it Ancient Greek mythology they’d be getting into

    • @josuearagon8768
      @josuearagon8768 Před 3 lety +2

      😂😂

    • @sjuvanet
      @sjuvanet Před 3 lety +3

      @@blobbykins7281 probably no philosophical school of thought with true virtue. and they'd definitely go for mythology over philosophy, absent of the stories' archetypal messages.

  • @user-mv3cg7hi7g
    @user-mv3cg7hi7g Před rokem +10

    This video is a masterful presentation on charisma and conversations. It does a great job of showing which aspects make Joe so successful as a host. Great video!

  • @Waiting4Him111
    @Waiting4Him111 Před 7 měsíci +1

    I'm so glad this popped up in my feed. I have been making an effort to be more social, but i don't have great social skills. Obviously, it's not something you're born with; it's something you learn. Joe seems to have a genuine interest in others. That's the first thing i have to grind into my brain. People like it when you seem to genuinely care about them.

  • @S..527
    @S..527 Před 3 lety +624

    There is a reason why the JRE podcast is the number 1.

    • @Brenden-H
      @Brenden-H Před 3 lety +42

      DMT

    • @imfineimokay3434
      @imfineimokay3434 Před 3 lety

      I feel greatly aggravated by your pfp

    • @BenHall289
      @BenHall289 Před 3 lety +6

      Americans are easily pleased.

    • @googleisevil1041
      @googleisevil1041 Před 3 lety +14

      Ben Hall number one podcast “worldwide”

    • @BenHall289
      @BenHall289 Před 3 lety +3

      Google Isevil Fair enough. People in general are easily pleased/entertained

  • @ogluster8873
    @ogluster8873 Před 3 lety +2160

    “How to appear human” would also be an appropriate role.

    • @ogluster8873
      @ogluster8873 Před 3 lety +39

      why did i write role?

    • @SniPeMaSSacUre
      @SniPeMaSSacUre Před 3 lety +4

      Yeah I feel like I naturally do these things. I didn’t get much out of this video

    • @santosgil9123
      @santosgil9123 Před 3 lety +2

      We have the same Exact name 😮

    • @ogluster8873
      @ogluster8873 Před 3 lety +1

      @@santosgil9123 woah dude

    • @Walter-mr5hd
      @Walter-mr5hd Před 3 lety +4

      Zuckerberg: "Write that down, write that down"

  • @todddenenR5
    @todddenenR5 Před 10 měsíci +1

    Great summary of Joe's technique and strategies. Thanks for putting this all together and sharing.

  • @brownchaos84
    @brownchaos84 Před rokem +4

    This is a great video. Real valuable points, awesome editing in of the examples and an awesome and relevant suggestion at the end

  • @reuniteireland
    @reuniteireland Před 3 lety +1754

    You make a lot of good points and Joe is excellent at keeping a conversation going. The biggest advantage Joe has is that all of his guests have agreed ahead of time to spend hours of a day and likely travelled to be there just to talk with him. This changes the whole dynamic in that they are already invested heavily prior to the conversation starting.

    • @reemaalhamdan1
      @reemaalhamdan1 Před 2 lety +98

      I think you’re focusing too much on the end result of his success. Joe has real talent, maybe he started with people who were willing to spend 2h but now people want to spend the 2h.

    • @jacksonzheng3103
      @jacksonzheng3103 Před 2 lety +13

      Ur right, it does help but it's not like you have to be an interviewer to talk to someone.

    • @the22game
      @the22game Před 2 lety +44

      @@jacksonzheng3103 think the dude is saying the man's over here obsessed with Joe is not using the best example. Its a podcast/interview both parties were looking forward to. The best thing to take from here and some points on how to compliment properly to make people be more comfortable with you

    • @orgANGmo
      @orgANGmo Před 2 lety +29

      Normally the guests don't even realize it's been 3 hours. He keeps them talking and interested. He is the best at what he does.

    • @ElvenMans
      @ElvenMans Před 2 lety +2

      Just like on a date with a girl, or with anyone.

  • @josuenunez5353
    @josuenunez5353 Před 3 lety +220

    Me: Dude I hate Mondays.
    Stranger: What's the most you ever lost on a coin toss?

  • @nicoleb9047
    @nicoleb9047 Před měsícem

    This video might be the most helpful and practical advice I have ever received on CZcams EVER. Thank you ❤

  • @davidguy209
    @davidguy209 Před 11 měsíci +3

    I watched many of your videos, but I'm a new subscriber. I'm nearly 57 years old, and have always been/ felt a pariah. I have to admit, your observations and advice are eye-opening, even for someone my age. If only I'd had a resource like this when I was younger...

  • @drrab
    @drrab Před 3 lety +404

    "Where do you live?"
    "Bla bla-"
    "Why do you live?"

  • @SamMartinPeakPerformance
    @SamMartinPeakPerformance Před 3 lety +498

    asking "Why?" questions gets everyone to open up

    • @huberduberdoo
      @huberduberdoo Před 3 lety +67

      "Why are you feeling sad?"
      "I don't know, google it up."

    • @SamMartinPeakPerformance
      @SamMartinPeakPerformance Před 3 lety +5

      @Biff Malibu it only becomes judgemental basdd on the tone in which it is used

    • @zohnhadley5217
      @zohnhadley5217 Před 3 lety +3

      Why do you think it does?

    • @bluetickbeagles116
      @bluetickbeagles116 Před 3 lety +3

      My only question to the, “why” is, wouldn’t it come across as nosey or prying?

    • @SamMartinPeakPerformance
      @SamMartinPeakPerformance Před 3 lety

      @@bluetickbeagles116 depends on the context - obviously you wouldn't go asking why why why to anyone and everyone ha

  • @uniquegodly7855
    @uniquegodly7855 Před rokem

    Amazing knowledge. Thank you so much. I will be applying this next time I go on a date.

  • @Humanfacehumanityfirst
    @Humanfacehumanityfirst Před 3 měsíci

    This channel is very helpful!
    I have created a binge watch on the channel.
    The contents are top notch !

  • @coreydiculous
    @coreydiculous Před 3 lety +630

    I've been mirroring people all wrong. I've been waiting for people to come into bathrooms, and when they do, I smile, make eye contact through the mirror, and say "WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?!"

    • @Woahlookitthemoon
      @Woahlookitthemoon Před 3 lety +18

      Next time hand them a towl and wait for a tip

    • @Louganda
      @Louganda Před 3 lety +14

      What business haveth you in this bathroom brethren

    • @Madchris8828
      @Madchris8828 Před 3 lety +1

      😂 come on that has to work great!

    • @sswafflez4281
      @sswafflez4281 Před 3 lety +7

      Imagining this in real life just cracks me up. I want to try this now.

    • @banzaiib
      @banzaiib Před 2 lety

      i bet you're fun at parties

  • @502opz346
    @502opz346 Před 3 lety +1596

    There is one BIG note - he knows everything about his guest and he has studied everything about them.He simply knows that he likes cars or wrestling.

    • @chibidib
      @chibidib Před 3 lety +62

      Then on podcast with Elon it turns out he never saw Falcon 9 landing 😂

    • @nvmffs
      @nvmffs Před 3 lety +11

      So why does he need these empty questions then?

    • @abstractlogik4040
      @abstractlogik4040 Před 2 lety +52

      @@nvmffs "everything" was an overstatement

    • @tahitiantreatskeetjuice23
      @tahitiantreatskeetjuice23 Před 2 lety +9

      exactly. this stuff doesnt always help when youre meeting new people, but it CAN help.

    • @tomcarling1146
      @tomcarling1146 Před 2 lety +25

      So stalk people and get to know everything about them before engaging in small talk, got it.

  • @bewellwithdanyel938
    @bewellwithdanyel938 Před 2 lety

    Great info. Thanks as always!

  • @can6441
    @can6441 Před 2 měsíci

    This was so helpful

  • @jimmyjab190
    @jimmyjab190 Před 3 lety +170

    I was just googling how to not be awkward in a coversation and then I get the notification for this video right after, amazing thank you!

    • @AxxLAfriku
      @AxxLAfriku Před 3 lety

      AAAAAAHHHHH!!!! PAAAAAIIIINNNN!!!!!!
      I broke my hand yesterday because of the hate comments I get on my amazing videos. I was so angry that I punched a hole in my computer. Please don't comment anything mean on my wonderful videos, dear jim

    • @alaskawoolf3737
      @alaskawoolf3737 Před 3 lety +2

      Big brother is watching you dude

    • @justinfernandez9876
      @justinfernandez9876 Před 3 lety +6

      The fbi guy assigned to your computer came in clutch

    • @professorbaxtercarelessdre1075
      @professorbaxtercarelessdre1075 Před 3 lety

      wow that was lucky then :)

  • @DESTRAKON
    @DESTRAKON Před 3 lety +56

    As "the quiet guy" that speaks when spoken to, this helps alot, thanks

  • @mdgeisto8953
    @mdgeisto8953 Před 5 měsíci

    Love the use of examples, very cool and makes sense immediately 👍

  • @Mannygugu
    @Mannygugu Před rokem

    This a great video. Thanks!!!

  • @Dunwich93
    @Dunwich93 Před 3 lety +131

    "Hi how are you?"
    "High, how are you?"

  • @davidsdinero
    @davidsdinero Před 3 lety +177

    Social and financial skills are such important skills to have and will be helpful to get you the most out of life!

  • @paulochf
    @paulochf Před 11 měsíci +1

    As a ND person that doesn't have any usual interest in small talk while putting people into awkwardness, this is groundbreaking for me. Thank you!

  • @ren1643
    @ren1643 Před 8 měsíci +1

    Thats funny this video resonates with me because I’ve been using these practices in introspection. And now I realize I can use them in social situations too.

  • @aggressiveworshiper3155
    @aggressiveworshiper3155 Před 3 lety +166

    Solid points, especially the mirroring. Making the person feel heard and generally continuing the conversation.

    • @GhostSamaritan
      @GhostSamaritan Před 3 lety +10

      Yup, continuing the conversation... You know, that reminds me of nothing at all because my mind is blank.

    • @xillyworld
      @xillyworld Před 3 lety +1

      W

  • @BitchChill
    @BitchChill Před 3 lety +480

    I'll have to gain social skills through watching videos instead of interacting with people

    • @loubejasa5380
      @loubejasa5380 Před 3 lety +1

      is that bad or smth

    • @masterofsorrow2699
      @masterofsorrow2699 Před 3 lety +67

      Videos can only prepare you...you need actual experience afterwards to get it right.

    • @loubejasa5380
      @loubejasa5380 Před 3 lety +5

      @@masterofsorrow2699 right master

    • @drifter402
      @drifter402 Před 3 lety

      You can't do it like that though. you're gonna remember all this advice when you need it without practice. The mind just doesn't work like that

    • @anna.318
      @anna.318 Před 3 lety

      Master of Sorrow So true, you need to put it into practice

  • @lincs1635
    @lincs1635 Před 2 měsíci

    Soo helpful ty

  • @JesusMedina-ty6pi
    @JesusMedina-ty6pi Před rokem +4

    I work as a valet in a casino. And small talk is a big part of it. As someone who’s always been an introvert this has been a huge challenge for me

  • @Sakaki98
    @Sakaki98 Před 3 lety +545

    How socially anxious people make small talk:
    “How are you?”
    “I’m good.”
    “...Nice talking to you(man, I’m such a legend!)”

    • @startasticalart6138
      @startasticalart6138 Před 3 lety +2

      Please make a video with Daniel Radcliffe!!!

    • @wirly-
      @wirly- Před 3 lety +59

      Socially anxious people after watching this video:
      How are you?
      Im good
      Reminds me of that time when i was good.
      you were good.
      Why?
      Hahahha

    • @yasenemad9693
      @yasenemad9693 Před 3 lety +1

      So why did you pick this video to watch?....sorry just practicing😂

    • @maisetas
      @maisetas Před 3 lety +6

      dmt

    • @isaiahhiggins
      @isaiahhiggins Před 3 lety

      Stop calling me out 😂

  • @onebridge7231
    @onebridge7231 Před 3 lety +280

    Joe is highly underrated as a communicator. He comes off as crude to some, but he is highly intelligent and will methodically work you into a corner if you’re spitting B.S. and then masterly backs off and redirects once he tore you down, but before you get too combative. It’s a roller coaster to watch him play with some people!

    • @kanisbdg
      @kanisbdg Před 2 lety +1

      @Peyton Pendley no, these are subconscious techniques that come off natural because they're natural based on experience and wisdom

    • @beasthaven1571
      @beasthaven1571 Před 2 lety

      Where can you learn this skill…

    • @tarico4436
      @tarico4436 Před 2 lety +4

      Yes. I have seen Joe do that to some of his guests. Joe's sure he's more correct about some issue, he'll push it for a bit, but then back off into a more agreeable two-way conversation.

    • @robertjohnson8250
      @robertjohnson8250 Před rokem

      @Pepe Pupu wait, so you mean a successful podcast host who interviews people, guiding long conversations for a living is manipulative?
      Will someone nominate this man for a Nobel Peace Price; what a revelation!

    • @NASkeywest
      @NASkeywest Před rokem

      Ex fyfyEd and cm😢e Dr. Red Dr. Red

  • @drewdorris7563
    @drewdorris7563 Před 10 měsíci +6

    I was an already very outgoing , talkative and charismatic person. I was still a little awkward sometimes when meeting someone new. I recently have gotten my first job as a waiter. I have been doing this for about 6 months and I undoubtedly feel more confident (then I already was) talking to new people and being able to communicate in a nice polite way that makes people have an enjoyable energy when I am speaking with them. PARENTS 1000% recommend pushing something in service industry as a first job for kids like me to grow and become independent when communicating with people. I find myself when with my parents introduce me to new people I instantly make a good impression and leave a good thought of myself to them. Great for networking and building VALUABLE communication skills with people

  • @jacksoncalame495
    @jacksoncalame495 Před 17 dny

    This is possibly my favorite CZcams channel. Your teaching skills are 🔥🔥🔥🔥🏆🏆🏆🏆🥇!

  • @johngunther744
    @johngunther744 Před 3 lety +53

    I forgot how to act with people when my dad started putting me down treating me like s*** and having no sense of worth so forth so thank you for this

  • @Kadood
    @Kadood Před 3 lety +74

    I grew up super extroverted but realized as i became an adult that i have horrible conversational skills. You are a life saver

    • @littlecars96
      @littlecars96 Před rokem

      why?

    • @Kadood
      @Kadood Před rokem +7

      @@littlecars96 cus ive taken way too many psychedelics and my brain go brrr sometimes

    • @Leyuhm
      @Leyuhm Před rokem

      @@Kadood BRUH FEELS LMAO

    • @asadfalconsfan1851
      @asadfalconsfan1851 Před rokem +1

      @@Kadood same man

    • @theephantommenace
      @theephantommenace Před rokem

      @@Kadood I feel I fried my brain off psychedelics too 🤣

  • @stevethompson8504
    @stevethompson8504 Před 2 měsíci

    This has been a great vid thanks. Really usefull.

  • @blackirish670
    @blackirish670 Před rokem

    It's good to know a little bit about a lot of topics. It makes finding that common subject.

  • @Micah__
    @Micah__ Před 3 lety +170

    Waitress: Enjoy your food!
    Me: You too! 🤦🏻‍♂️

    • @user-im3gj6cl4x
      @user-im3gj6cl4x Před 3 lety +8

      All the time 😂

    • @jacklambert2607
      @jacklambert2607 Před 3 lety +5

      Always when checking in bags at the airport: Counter: Have a nice flight. Me: Thanks. You too.

    • @johnwirk
      @johnwirk Před 3 lety +2

      Cashier: Bye thanks.
      Me: Have a good tonight.

    • @crashgaming1985
      @crashgaming1985 Před 3 lety

      Lool 😂

    • @brandonellis8111
      @brandonellis8111 Před 3 lety

      My boy Lenarr Young got stomped because he said you too after saying thank you 🤕

  • @jamiewainwright2150
    @jamiewainwright2150 Před 3 lety +43

    small talks actually really easy if you don't care what other people think about you and just have enough confidence in yourself

  • @David-hl1wo
    @David-hl1wo Před rokem +4

    Its crazy how I've been doing some of these things subconsciously, interesting to see how people analyze these things

  • @miladsohrabi95
    @miladsohrabi95 Před rokem

    Loved this one

  • @stephanrobert5593
    @stephanrobert5593 Před 3 lety +328

    "How old are you?"
    "I'm 25"
    "Why are you 25"
    "uhm..."
    *fecc mission failed, we'll get 'em next time*

  • @asspounderify
    @asspounderify Před 3 lety +242

    All I think is. This silence hurts you more than it does me. Therefore I thrive in the awkward silence

  • @fjbdc
    @fjbdc Před 2 lety

    Great tips!

  • @NabDabs
    @NabDabs Před 5 měsíci +1

    1. when you first meet, compliment them.
    examples are thank you so much for being here; I love being around people like you, you are going for sht all the time and it’s amazing because you give out so much energy; nice to meet you; congrats on the engagement.
    Compliments to avoid: sexual, making a compliment we don’t mean, Don't dwell on compliments; it means when conversation focuses more on the compliment than the actual topic. Especially with high-status people who oftem receive compliments, they might not value them much. It's better to swiftly shift from the compliment to the main conversation topic.
    2. Smoothly transition to new topics: employ the "reminds me of" technique. When asked a question, use your answer as a way to steer the conversation to a new topic in relation to the previous topic. This is done by mentally asking yourself, "What does this remind me of?"
    Dont just answer the question, elaborate.
    if you were asked a question about a topic that you’re not interested in, use lateral thinking to transition to something else. an example of this would be:
    Interviewer: “are you a fan of baseball crowd noise?”
    Interviewee: “No I’m not a fan of the noise. I hated when cars do that. They…”
    3. mentioned topics that you think you both have interest: Talk about topics that you like and if the other looks excited, then keep it going. don’t talk about stuff if you don’t think the other is going to like.
    4. getting other people excited about the conversation: don’t ask yes-no questions. instead, ask “why” question to get someone talking about what they value.
    Ex: where do you live? Why do you live there?
    Ex: what do you do for work? Why did you decide to do that?
    This way, you can hear what’s important to them and you can center the topic around that.
    5. Ask questions that are fun to answer like what-ifs, if you, hypothetical, favorite, would you rather, personal stories,
    6. create a connection with people while talking: allow yourself to laugh, but don’t think laugh. Laugh when you find something funny.
    7. make the other feel heard by mirroring. it’s when you repeat the last few words that the other person said. Its a way to interrupt it without ignoring the other person.

  • @jaytonbennett9722
    @jaytonbennett9722 Před 3 lety +11

    As a barber who small talks for a living, this was cool to see someone else described those little things i see in small talk. Great video!

  • @carterbozovich9669
    @carterbozovich9669 Před 3 lety +12

    Summary of this Video, hope it helps.
    1. Start with a compliment about their work, energy or physical.
    mistakes possibly
    -to Sexual
    -Make it genuine
    2.Transition with "this reminds me of (blank)"
    If you don't like a new topic then remind or compare it to something you like.
    3. Look for topics of sharing interest.
    4.Get others to be excited about the topic by asking whys questions.
    Ask the first question like where do you live? then why?
    Ask questions that are fun and unrealistic.
    5. Create a connection by laughing. The more you laugh the easier it becomes.
    Mirror others by repeating last 3 words to make this feel heard.
    Stay true to yourself and not pick your words so slowly.

  • @fghjfghjf9554
    @fghjfghjf9554 Před 2 lety +1

    I think this video will definitely help my social skills and my ability to converse with others, after being homeschooled for a few years it's hard to make friends.

  • @hussainabbas1341
    @hussainabbas1341 Před rokem

    Thanks so much

  • @miselneral
    @miselneral Před 3 lety +660

    Joe is making "small talk" with people that can be searched up online and see what talking points can be good so the conversations dont just halt.
    When you meet someone for the first time you just have to figure it out.

    • @rvh4034
      @rvh4034 Před 3 lety +81

      Yeah imagine meeting someone for the first time and not knowing anything about them and then state "I love being around people like you" hahaha Fcking AWKWARD

    • @cleansocks3460
      @cleansocks3460 Před 3 lety +34

      i mean that guys beard was pretty easy to notice. you can also use that energy card slightly down the line after maybe you ask them a couple personal questions that would reveal some things about their character

    • @El1as--
      @El1as-- Před 3 lety +24

      The video literally explained how to do it with anybody

    • @rvh4034
      @rvh4034 Před 3 lety +16

      @@El1as-- make a vid of you doing it please. Show us that it works.

    • @kremin234
      @kremin234 Před 3 lety +4

      So just... figure it out.

  • @flightjam
    @flightjam Před 3 lety +205

    "where were you born?"
    "California"
    "Why?"

    • @jairdamian9245
      @jairdamian9245 Před 3 lety +5

      'Cause I'm hella cool, That's why! 😎

    • @ericgol7
      @ericgol7 Před 3 lety +1

      Prepare for a depressing answer if you ask that

    • @alrivers2297
      @alrivers2297 Před 3 lety

      @@ericgol7 what state are you from?

  • @randomdaveUK
    @randomdaveUK Před rokem +13

    Running a podcast like his that's built this massive reputation ain't easy.
    It's great to take this deep dive. Joe isn't winging all this

    • @queenslander954
      @queenslander954 Před 7 měsíci

      Maybe not , but siding with whack-job MAGA’s theory’s on Dem’s stitching up January 06 attack has scraped the barrel.

  • @kensleyraoapajee4590
    @kensleyraoapajee4590 Před rokem

    Thank you Joe !

  • @cuevasjose27
    @cuevasjose27 Před 3 lety +2486

    Joe laughs at everything because he’s high.

    • @lennon_richardson
      @lennon_richardson Před 3 lety +57

      I laughed at that and I’m not even high.

    • @wadecarefully
      @wadecarefully Před 3 lety +83

      @@lennon_richardson I laughed at that and I am high

    • @ferguson1376
      @ferguson1376 Před 3 lety +26

      @@wadecarefully I laughed at this thread and I am low

    • @emr1d341
      @emr1d341 Před 3 lety +7

      Maybe. But he also has a natural sense of humor. Joe's done standup, and standup is about finding humor in the mundane.

    • @Likexner
      @Likexner Před 3 lety

      It doesnt work like that.

  • @comedy8219
    @comedy8219 Před 3 lety +16

    In the beginning of the conversation, 1. Grease the wheels by giving them a compliment of either their Work, Energy, Or Physical Appearance. Do not make it too sexual, and think of a genuine compliment to those who may be complimented a lot.
    2. Use reminds me of thinking. When you are in a conversation think to yourself what does this most remind me of, could be an object, a movie, an actor, or a funny appearance, and use lateral transition to something the both of you could enjoy talking about.
    3. Ping things to other topics of interest, create a web of ideas and thinking that stems from whatever was mentioned. until you find mutual common interests. 4. get people to become excited about the conversation once they are speaking. Peel back the onion and ask deeper why questions. For them to tell you why and what is important to them. 5. Create a connection/ let them make you laugh. Allow yourself to laugh when they talk, don't fake laughter let it be genuine. 6. Mirroring, repeating the last 1 - 3 words to make them feel heard. Do not do it too often stay true to yourself and don't copy every sentence. It is a way to interrupt while allowing them to feel heard and to build rapport.

    • @simeon3D
      @simeon3D Před 3 lety

      Great summary!

    • @raymondqiu8202
      @raymondqiu8202 Před 3 lety

      Thanks so much dude ❤️❤️. You saving ppl hella time to write a summary by doing this

  • @nickranly6522
    @nickranly6522 Před rokem

    Great video. Keep posting this to kids that don't know analog vs digital/internet/social media.

  • @RebelSyntax
    @RebelSyntax Před rokem

    Nice vid. Helpful

  • @dollyri1995
    @dollyri1995 Před 3 lety +14

    Not to mention Joe does something I absolutely love and wish every person did which is they act like they've known you forever and are super warm, friendly, joyful toward you right when they meet you, and it doesn't feel like there's an invisible awkward wall between the two of you. I try and do that but man social anxiety doesn't make it easy.

  • @extremerunner
    @extremerunner Před 3 lety +181

    So just talk about things you’re interested in, be curious, and be genuine.

    • @wormman1772
      @wormman1772 Před 3 lety +3

      if you can, try to be interested in about anything. the more you know, the better

    • @ewngzedward6182
      @ewngzedward6182 Před 3 lety +5

      @@wormman1772 or just be genuinely uninterested in a lot of things.

    • @wormman1772
      @wormman1772 Před 3 lety +1

      @@ewngzedward6182 that works too

    • @dguyiop8
      @dguyiop8 Před 2 lety

      Pretending to be genuine works. I agree.

  • @spjr99
    @spjr99 Před rokem +4

    I feel really lucky a lot of these things came naturally to me but for some people like selectively mute people it's so difficult

  • @okoknotok
    @okoknotok Před rokem

    Very useful tips!