Subhan Allah the Shaykh looked stressed to even answer the question and even asked him to repeat the question. It’s not easy giving fatwa (especially in these modern days with all kinds of innovations and different Muslims). Very heavy on them. May Allah make it easy, forgive his mistakes and allow him a close entrance back to him. Amin
Hide it but in the end the first will always discover and your life will turn to hell and destroys both marriages and children. If you are such a coward that you need to hide from your first wife, you shouldn't be married at all.
@@xeriklthe first wife isnt wrathful, its usually just extreme pain from finding out your life was a lie. Its likely he would have to lie in order to stay some nights with his other wife. And children internalise that they were also abandoned, they fight over inheritance and feel that they werent enough. Often children hate the father that did this more than the first wife. Ive seen this sort of situation happen around 8 times where one woman almost completely lost her mind. It actually does seem to come out in the end and then the lie hurts everyone. Such a shame.
Do you have knowledge and scholarship regarding in depth Islamic matters? If the answer is no, your thoughts are invalid, baseless, and useless. Islam is not based on your feelings, my feelings, nor anyone else’s feelings. It’s based on the guidance on Quran, Sunnah, and the lifestyle of the companions.
May Allah reward the Shaykh. Islam protects the honour of every woman in marriage and the man should look in anyway to please both wives. If the first wife is rebellious such that she could be a threat to life, deen and honour of her husband , then he should hide it away from her until later when she is calm in other to pacify her jealousy But if the 1st wife is an obedient and patient type of woman he may disclose it to her in other to give her reassurance of love and compassion. Women are generally jealous, but they have different levels of jealous control.
Basically from my understanding, he is talking about "prohibition" in the first part, then "advice". So, doing it is not haram but it is not advised. Ex: eating peanut is not haram but if it is bad for you (allergy) then it is not advised ! Allahu 'alam
And some Shaykhs actually believe it's prohibited to hide if they're in the same country because in the end you will have to lie or someone else's rights end up being affected. Shaykh Bin Baz is in that category.
One of my shaykh received a similar question and he said we should not hide it bcz it will have bad consequences for him later. He gave an example of a son marrying a girl without informing his father or family. How bad that will look to the father or family? He also said a man should not be like a thief in the eyes of his wife their should be trust between both if you want to do second marriage then do It without hiding it no matter if the first one would agree or not but do not hide it.
Hide it its permissible so. But what if the first ask questions. Where are you going ? What will he repond then ? A lie ?? So it will become haraam. So i dont really see how he can hide it without making dhunub...
@@Mirrin27 yes, and this is not in situations like these, it is restricted to superficial things like, if he likes how she looks etc. I asked a shaykh regarding this
There seems to to “ 2 camps “ on this matter . Camp #1 - Polygamy is for the benefit of women and society, including marrying widows , etc Camp# 2- polygamy is for the man and his sexual appetite and the women have to deal with it , they are lucky to have a roof over their head
I’m not sure about the description of your camp 2 because the women involved in the camp 2 scenario seem to have desires too. Unless they’re getting married for other reasons, but it’s not as one sided as you just described.
@@cushconsultinggroup camp 1 - the scholars on Islam on demand ( Abdul Hakeem Murad have a lecture on the purpose of Polygamy) vs camp 2 a variety of male CZcamsrs
@@cushconsultinggroup camp 1 listen to Abdal Hakeem murad a theologian and Muslim scholar ( he goes into detail about the purpose of polygamy vs camp 2 a male CZcamsr Mahkdi Tijani . It’s purely observational . People have their religions , cultures , customs etc and can do what they want within the law
Not really. Some husbands travel for work for several months and so on, so there are instances this question is not even raised, so there won't be no lie. Anyhow, in my opinion, eventho my opinion doesn't matter if one chooses to marry a second wife bestbhe tells her beforehand.
@@Abdunative A Hadith on when lying is permissible: “It is not lawful to lie except in three cases: Something the man tells his wife to please her, to lie during war, and to lie in order to bring peace between the people.” (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1938)
As far as i know, the condition for polygamy is justice. If you hide it from the 1st wife, then wheres the justice? Imo the permission from the wife is not a requirement but if the wive does not want any part of the polygamous marriage then its her right to ask the husband to let her go and the husband should give her rights
As a muslima how asking for divorce, something that Allah hates, comes up first before accepting the right that Allah gave to his servant (having a second, third, fourth wife)? Also, if ever he gives her divorce, that would make it for her more difficult to marry afterwards knowing that some brothers base their choice on that. It’s all in the hand of the women really (assuming that the brother find absolute necessity in marrying a seconde, third or fourth wife)
@@scottshein3303 its not "the right that Allah gave" It is permissable on certain term and if one cant fulfill it, its better to stick with just one. Men allowed to marry upto 4 but its also permissable for the women to reject it or ask for a divorce.
I think the answer is short sighted in so many ways, wives have a right to kind treatment, there is nothing kind about conspiring with everyone to conceal another marriage from your wife and potential SIBLINGS from one another, this is harmful to the wife and her children and any children which may be born from the second marriage, in Islam there should be no harm or reciprocating harm. a woman who agrees to marry a man who is already married AND forgo her God given marital rights is clearly a woman who has few options in terms of marriage else no one in their right mind would agree to such an arrangement, a man who stipulates such to a woman SIMPLY because he doesn't want his first wife to discover he is deceiving her into believing he is monogamous is a cowardly and selfish man, Islam honours women as should marriage,
With all due respect, you are an anonymous random person on CZcams comment section and Shaykh is a well known scholar. I suggest you sit down and learn before you think you can teach ulama and humble yourself.
@@abc-kn6exAccording to whom? Are you another scholar? How about other scholars who give a different answer in regards of this issue? If you believe lying and being deceitful towards another believer is halal, then go on with your practice. Lakum deenukum waliyadeen
To be honest this video is making me unhappy and pessimistic about marriage as a female. Can anyone please explain how this is advantageous to women? Why is this islamically allowed? So if a man feels that "he fears he will commit zina" it's okay to go behind his wife's back and lie? I wish I never clicked on this video. I don't want this to affect my emaan. I've already read before Ibn Baz's fatwa on something marriage related that really didn't sit right with me. (I don't want to mention it in fear that I cause doubts to someone else) يا مقلب القلوب ثبت قلبي على دينك.
Ameen. We can't say something is haram unless there is clear evidence to prove it. So a man concealing his second marriage from his first wife isn't haram however it is discouraged as the Sheikh pointed out. Marriage is supposed to be announced and public, not kept hidden and secret! If you come across something in the religion that doesn't sit right with you then either you misunderstood it or the flaw is with your reasoning as you cannot comprehend the wisdom behind it. Allah (swt) only commands that which is good and to our benefit. Sometimes we are so far away from our fitrah (natural disposition that Allah created us upon) that what is good/just seems wrong/unjust and what is wrong/unjust seems good/just.
@@syedjunaidyusuf Yes of course it's just but since it's just, the scholars should have a good reason to make it makrooh and not haram. Fatwas have to have some kind of reasoning if its not something explicitly said in a hadith/quraan verse. I can think of some situations where a man would have to marry a second wife, I'm not against polygamy in of itself but I don't see why it's necessary to do it behind the first wife's back. If you read my comment carefully I never said Allah is unjust. I just said it makes me unhappy and it's decreasing my emaan. So far no one has even explained to me why it'd be advantageous or why it's allowed so it seems others don't know either how this would benefit a woman. Anything kept secret will eventually be revealed and hurt people a lot. Maybe in a society where women are okay with their man being shared around without them even knowing, and for eg. the woman isn't able give the man his full rights so he does it behind her back. To me, this is *somewhat* justifiable but still should've just told the first wife directly. If a woman did this to her husband it's blatant cheating and she'd be stoned to death. So come on, we don't just have these rulings for no reason. Allah decrees everything for a reason.
BTW just to make it clear this video and Bin Baz fatwa haven't caused me to doubt Allah's wisdom or justice, it has caused me to doubt those specific fataawa. I think Al Albani had that breastfeeding fatwa that caused uproar, so surely no scholar is perfect.
In Judaism based on Torrah(Taurat) men could have 2 wives but it was made illegal 1200 years ago by some rabbi .Polygamy is not a new thing. Remember that Allah knows the best and we aren't like the Jews who change their religion. I understand that you think polygamy is weird but we are slave of Allah and we have to obey him .
For anyone commenting their opinions and feelings, consider this: Do you have knowledge and scholarship regarding in depth Islamic matters? If the answer is no, your thoughts are invalid, baseless, and useless. Islam is not based on your feelings, my feelings, nor anyone else’s feelings. It’s based on the guidance of Allah, The Messenger-peace be upon him, and the lifestyle of the companions.
No harm in lying to your first wife? No harm in not letting your first wife know that you have now have got a second? So therefore no harm in telling your first wife if you are now a father to other children and no harm in not letting the children of your first wife know that they may have step brothers or sisters. And what if his son from his first marriage meets the step sister that he never knew he had and she not knowing that he is her step brother and likewise he not knowing she's related to him, what if they wanted to get engaged? How I would love to see the son from the first marriage knock on the door of the second marriage and he's father answering the door. And all because of scholars in their hightowers who are not questioned by their students. They are truly detached from reality
Noblemann i dnt think in anypoint he said no harm in lying to your first wife, lying is haram maybe you should listen carefully first before you jst writing like a jaahil.
Fudayl Ibn iyaad (Rahimahullah) said that the head of good manners with us is that a person knows his level. Don’t think you can refute a scholar of Ahlus Sunnah when you haven’t even studied under anyone, if you have a doubt ask the people of knowledge if you don’t know, don’t spread the doubts around, May Allah guide us.
Yes, I should Leave the scholars and listen to YOU instead... No! The man didn't say lie to your wife, he said conceal the second wife from the first. A man can get married whenever he needs to and he doesn't require the permission of the first, unless she has stipulated that condition in the marriage contract. But he advised against it and said it should be done publicly to avoid fighting later on. There is a difference between your feelings and actual halal and haram rules. You can't just call something haram cuz you just feel like it. Know your level.
Do not lie or invent that about which you have no knowledge. It's bringing anger to Allah to speak about His prophets or about Himself without knowledge and attributing fabrications
Subhan Allah the Shaykh looked stressed to even answer the question and even asked him to repeat the question. It’s not easy giving fatwa (especially in these modern days with all kinds of innovations and different Muslims). Very heavy on them. May Allah make it easy, forgive his mistakes and allow him a close entrance back to him. Amin
Hide it but in the end the first will always discover and your life will turn to hell and destroys both marriages and children. If you are such a coward that you need to hide from your first wife, you shouldn't be married at all.
Astaghfirullah, this is why jahanam will be full of women. The man has done no sin here. If the first wife wants to be wrathful then SHE is wrong
@@xeriklthe first wife isnt wrathful, its usually just extreme pain from finding out your life was a lie. Its likely he would have to lie in order to stay some nights with his other wife. And children internalise that they were also abandoned, they fight over inheritance and feel that they werent enough. Often children hate the father that did this more than the first wife. Ive seen this sort of situation happen around 8 times where one woman almost completely lost her mind. It actually does seem to come out in the end and then the lie hurts everyone. Such a shame.
Do you have knowledge and scholarship regarding in depth Islamic matters? If the answer is no, your thoughts are invalid, baseless, and useless. Islam is not based on your feelings, my feelings, nor anyone else’s feelings. It’s based on the guidance on Quran, Sunnah, and the lifestyle of the companions.
Yes, I do.
@@ZM-et7ztdoesn’t fucking matter laws of Allah don’t change. When Allah has said a man carry marry up to 4 wives that’s it
May Allah reward the Shaykh. Islam protects the honour of every woman in marriage and the man should look in anyway to please both wives. If the first wife is rebellious such that she could be a threat to life, deen and honour of her husband , then he should hide it away from her until later when she is calm in other to pacify her jealousy But if the 1st wife is an obedient and patient type of woman he may disclose it to her in other to give her reassurance of love and compassion. Women are generally jealous, but they have different levels of jealous control.
Basically from my understanding, he is talking about "prohibition" in the first part, then "advice". So, doing it is not haram but it is not advised. Ex: eating peanut is not haram but if it is bad for you (allergy) then it is not advised ! Allahu 'alam
And some Shaykhs actually believe it's prohibited to hide if they're in the same country because in the end you will have to lie or someone else's rights end up being affected. Shaykh Bin Baz is in that category.
Brother turn off your ads please. Music, women without hijab..this is not good for the iman
CZcams puts these ads whether or not the uploader wants it. All he can choose is whether or not he wants the revenue from it.
@@mohammedabdullah6081the revenue is haram then
@@AM-dn1iqThe uploader won't receive revenue if he disables monetization
@@mohammedabdullah6081
Let's not incourage haram income he can try setting up a paytrion or something
@@mohammedabdullah6081 the man who sells alcohol will stop making revenue if he stops selling alcohol.
One of my shaykh received a similar question and he said we should not hide it bcz it will have bad consequences for him later.
He gave an example of a son marrying a girl without informing his father or family. How bad that will look to the father or family?
He also said a man should not be like a thief in the eyes of his wife their should be trust between both if you want to do second marriage then do It without hiding it no matter if the first one would agree or not but do not hide it.
Hide it its permissible so. But what if the first ask questions. Where are you going ? What will he repond then ? A lie ?? So it will become haraam. So i dont really see how he can hide it without making dhunub...
True
صحيح
There is actually conditions in which lying is okay. May Allah give us understanding
@@Mirrin27 yes, and this is not in situations like these, it is restricted to superficial things like, if he likes how she looks etc. I asked a shaykh regarding this
There seems to to “ 2 camps “ on this matter . Camp #1 - Polygamy is for the benefit of women and society, including marrying widows , etc Camp# 2- polygamy is for the man and his sexual appetite and the women have to deal with it , they are lucky to have a roof over their head
I’m not sure about the description of your camp 2 because the women involved in the camp 2 scenario seem to have desires too. Unless they’re getting married for other reasons, but it’s not as one sided as you just described.
@@cushconsultinggroup camp 1 - the scholars on Islam on demand ( Abdul Hakeem Murad have a lecture on the purpose of Polygamy) vs camp 2 a variety of male CZcamsrs
@@cushconsultinggroup camp 1 listen to Abdal Hakeem murad a theologian and Muslim scholar ( he goes into detail about the purpose of polygamy vs camp 2 a male CZcamsr Mahkdi Tijani . It’s purely observational . People have their religions , cultures , customs etc and can do what they want within the law
So if you combine both, it's a win-win for society
@@tahirballikaya213 we are not righteous people , even Abraham - Sara and Hagar could not handle the drama
Does he not have to lie to keep the secret. Is lying not a major sin?
No. He can use half truths. Half truths are halaal just like ibrahin said his wife was his sister(sister in Islaam)
Not really. Some husbands travel for work for several months and so on, so there are instances this question is not even raised, so there won't be no lie. Anyhow, in my opinion, eventho my opinion doesn't matter if one chooses to marry a second wife bestbhe tells her beforehand.
There is some conditions in which lying is okay may Allah give us understanding
@@Mirrin27 yes, and this is not one of them brother.
@@Abdunative
A Hadith on when lying is permissible:
“It is not lawful to lie except in three cases: Something the man tells his wife to please her, to lie during war, and to lie in order to bring peace between the people.” (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1938)
As far as i know, the condition for polygamy is justice. If you hide it from the 1st wife, then wheres the justice?
Imo the permission from the wife is not a requirement but if the wive does not want any part of the polygamous marriage then its her right to ask the husband to let her go and the husband should give her rights
Then its good islam is not build on your opinion
@@jonass8491the. It is good you are not Allah and allah is most just.
And the way allah made people. So yes most woman would leave btw..
@@hadjokhan6576 May Allah guide you and make it easy for your future husband of you do not have one already.
As a muslima how asking for divorce, something that Allah hates, comes up first before accepting the right that Allah gave to his servant (having a second, third, fourth wife)? Also, if ever he gives her divorce, that would make it for her more difficult to marry afterwards knowing that some brothers base their choice on that. It’s all in the hand of the women really (assuming that the brother find absolute necessity in marrying a seconde, third or fourth wife)
@@scottshein3303 its not "the right that Allah gave"
It is permissable on certain term and if one cant fulfill it, its better to stick with just one.
Men allowed to marry upto 4 but its also permissable for the women to reject it or ask for a divorce.
I think the answer is short sighted in so many ways, wives have a right to kind treatment, there is nothing kind about conspiring with everyone to conceal another marriage from your wife and potential SIBLINGS from one another, this is harmful to the wife and her children and any children which may be born from the second marriage,
in Islam there should be no harm or reciprocating harm.
a woman who agrees to marry a man who is already married AND forgo her God given marital rights is clearly a woman who has few options in terms of marriage else no one in their right mind would agree to such an arrangement, a man who stipulates such to a woman SIMPLY because he doesn't want his first wife to discover he is deceiving her into believing he is monogamous is a cowardly and selfish man,
Islam honours women as should marriage,
His statement is correct according to Quran and Sunnah. Don't let your emotions overcome you
With all due respect, you are an anonymous random person on CZcams comment section and Shaykh is a well known scholar. I suggest you sit down and learn before you think you can teach ulama and humble yourself.
@@abc-kn6exAccording to whom? Are you another scholar?
How about other scholars who give a different answer in regards of this issue?
If you believe lying and being deceitful towards another believer is halal, then go on with your practice. Lakum deenukum waliyadeen
@@hamzamuslim6141You do not sound like somebody who come from humility yourself.
@@hearty1240 Which Scholar? You are here speaking according to your desires. Have some respect when you address Sheikh Sulayman Ar Ruhaily.
😂 this is how people got fooled
People get duped by following their whims. Sometimes they even ask due to wanting to honor their whims and later do what they want anyway.
To be honest this video is making me unhappy and pessimistic about marriage as a female. Can anyone please explain how this is advantageous to women? Why is this islamically allowed? So if a man feels that "he fears he will commit zina" it's okay to go behind his wife's back and lie? I wish I never clicked on this video. I don't want this to affect my emaan. I've already read before Ibn Baz's fatwa on something marriage related that really didn't sit right with me. (I don't want to mention it in fear that I cause doubts to someone else)
يا مقلب القلوب ثبت قلبي على دينك.
Ameen.
We can't say something is haram unless there is clear evidence to prove it. So a man concealing his second marriage from his first wife isn't haram however it is discouraged as the Sheikh pointed out. Marriage is supposed to be announced and public, not kept hidden and secret!
If you come across something in the religion that doesn't sit right with you then either you misunderstood it or the flaw is with your reasoning as you cannot comprehend the wisdom behind it. Allah (swt) only commands that which is good and to our benefit. Sometimes we are so far away from our fitrah (natural disposition that Allah created us upon) that what is good/just seems wrong/unjust and what is wrong/unjust seems good/just.
@@syedjunaidyusuf Yes of course it's just but since it's just, the scholars should have a good reason to make it makrooh and not haram. Fatwas have to have some kind of reasoning if its not something explicitly said in a hadith/quraan verse.
I can think of some situations where a man would have to marry a second wife, I'm not against polygamy in of itself but I don't see why it's necessary to do it behind the first wife's back. If you read my comment carefully I never said Allah is unjust. I just said it makes me unhappy and it's decreasing my emaan. So far no one has even explained to me why it'd be advantageous or why it's allowed so it seems others don't know either how this would benefit a woman. Anything kept secret will eventually be revealed and hurt people a lot. Maybe in a society where women are okay with their man being shared around without them even knowing, and for eg. the woman isn't able give the man his full rights so he does it behind her back. To me, this is *somewhat* justifiable but still should've just told the first wife directly. If a woman did this to her husband it's blatant cheating and she'd be stoned to death. So come on, we don't just have these rulings for no reason. Allah decrees everything for a reason.
BTW just to make it clear this video and Bin Baz fatwa haven't caused me to doubt Allah's wisdom or justice, it has caused me to doubt those specific fataawa. I think Al Albani had that breastfeeding fatwa that caused uproar, so surely no scholar is perfect.
In Judaism based on Torrah(Taurat) men could have 2 wives but it was made illegal 1200 years ago by some rabbi .Polygamy is not a new thing. Remember that Allah knows the best and we aren't like the Jews who change their religion. I understand that you think polygamy is weird but we are slave of Allah and we have to obey him .
What exactly makes you pessimistic i dont understand, he said you shouldnt hide that youre marrying a second wife
For anyone commenting their opinions and feelings, consider this: Do you have knowledge and scholarship regarding in depth Islamic matters? If the answer is no, your thoughts are invalid, baseless, and useless. Islam is not based on your feelings, my feelings, nor anyone else’s feelings. It’s based on the guidance of Allah, The Messenger-peace be upon him, and the lifestyle of the companions.
No harm in lying to your first wife? No harm in not letting your first wife know that you have now have got a second?
So therefore no harm in telling your first wife if you are now a father to other children and no harm in not letting the children of your first wife know that they may have step brothers or sisters.
And what if his son from his first marriage meets the step sister that he never knew he had and she not knowing that he is her step brother and likewise he not knowing she's related to him, what if they wanted to get engaged? How I would love to see the son from the first marriage knock on the door of the second marriage and he's father answering the door.
And all because of scholars in their hightowers who are not questioned by their students.
They are truly detached from reality
true
Noblemann i dnt think in anypoint he said no harm in lying to your first wife, lying is haram maybe you should listen carefully first before you jst writing like a jaahil.
Fudayl Ibn iyaad (Rahimahullah) said that the head of good manners with us is that a person knows his level. Don’t think you can refute a scholar of Ahlus Sunnah when you haven’t even studied under anyone, if you have a doubt ask the people of knowledge if you don’t know, don’t spread the doubts around, May Allah guide us.
Yes, I should Leave the scholars and listen to YOU instead...
No!
The man didn't say lie to your wife, he said conceal the second wife from the first.
A man can get married whenever he needs to and he doesn't require the permission of the first, unless she has stipulated that condition in the marriage contract.
But he advised against it and said it should be done publicly to avoid fighting later on.
There is a difference between your feelings and actual halal and haram rules. You can't just call something haram cuz you just feel like it.
Know your level.
Who set the rules. allah !so shut up
It’s so much simpler to believe in the way Jesus Preached. One man one wife.
Do not lie or invent that about which you have no knowledge. It's bringing anger to Allah to speak about His prophets or about Himself without knowledge and attributing fabrications