The Ugly Truth About This Hobby! Not Worth The Headache!

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  • čas přidán 28. 08. 2024
  • Are these things happening to you too because of this hobby? Listen to my personal experience with this hobby and the negative impact it has had on me!
    #uglytruth
    #highendaudio
    #hifi
    #hobby
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Komentáře • 321

  • @jaysaudiolab
    @jaysaudiolab  Před 11 měsíci +28

    If you want more videos like this, please hit the like button and subscribe!

    • @topkho
      @topkho Před 11 měsíci +6

      That’s an amazing video, very courageous, caring and helpful ❤

    • @lovely88851
      @lovely88851 Před 11 měsíci +1

      Thanks

    • @notmanatee2445
      @notmanatee2445 Před 11 měsíci +1

      This is a perfect self help video! And take my advice, double check to see if all your equipment is off when you're done before you leave the room.

    • @tetrapro2010
      @tetrapro2010 Před 11 měsíci

      Jay, you need to know sound, everything you have,but hidden,which you don't know,cause a lack of knowledge of real sound

    • @Coneman3
      @Coneman3 Před 11 měsíci

      Use a master switch as I do.

  • @TechOTuesday
    @TechOTuesday Před 11 měsíci +44

    I can't tell you how many times I've seen people in this A/V hobby do everything possible to get their systems tweaked, upgraded, adjusted, sold, and only to re-purchase back, etc... They do everything but the main component of this lovely hobby----Enjoy the music!

    • @baronvonaux8294
      @baronvonaux8294 Před 11 měsíci +1

      There is 2 hobbies. Musicphile and Gearphile and the term audiophile is used to capture both.

    • @n.lyndley.9889
      @n.lyndley.9889 Před 11 měsíci

      there are two
      there is one

    • @erics.4113
      @erics.4113 Před 11 měsíci

      People obsessively "collect" all sorts of things. Buying is another dopamine hit that isn't unique to audio.
      Take care of your heads people. The music should help. A simple humble life is very freeing.

  • @joyfulexistence
    @joyfulexistence Před 11 měsíci +20

    Hi Jay,
    My wife hated my system for years. She refused to even try to enjoy it. She saw it as what it’s value represented in other possibilities in our life. I worked on this forever and eventually got her to see that we can do both. Now she will spend short amounts of time in my audio room. Never more than 30-45 min but that was a huge positive development. As far as time allotment goes, I generally only spend long hours with my system on Friday and Saturday nights. I have to get up and work on weekdays. Even then I spend those evenings with her doing what she wants to do then when she goes to bed (she likes to read so rarely stays up past 10) I head to my refuge until 1 or 2 am. And she honors this because it is a relatively small amount of time. I think this is a good balance. I also find that I look forward to these sessions and enjoy them immensely. I don’t get jaded. My system blows my mind all over again.
    The antidote to the affliction you describe is one drop of discipline and two drops of gratitude to that beautiful being who puts up with us and our strange love affair with sound.

    • @Vsread21
      @Vsread21 Před 11 měsíci +2

      Another easy solution to his problem is to buy her as many presents as you buy yourself!

    • @joyfulexistence
      @joyfulexistence Před 11 měsíci +3

      @@Vsread21
      Oh yes, and I try.
      Trouble is my wife was a banker and prefers an increased balance to stuff.
      Which is actually great in the real world…..a frugal wife.
      $150 Steely Dan records don’t help!

    • @redleather100
      @redleather100 Před 11 měsíci

      A good wife understands the sickness . 😅

  • @henryho7597
    @henryho7597 Před 11 měsíci +5

    2 months into this hobby and it’s true. The endless pursuit and obsession is not healthy when it takes over your mind and time.
    I will just enjoy what I have in moderation. Tks for sharing. 😊

  • @krzysztofgilowski1736
    @krzysztofgilowski1736 Před 11 měsíci +4

    The less I watch CZcams reviews, the less urge I feel to upgrade

  • @zandstormtrooper
    @zandstormtrooper Před 11 měsíci +2

    I started building my system pretty innocently enough. Then everything became “just one more piece” I even opened a private bank account in order to procure gear from overseas. Her finding out about the bank account almost cost me everything. Now I sit down. Close my eyes and enjoy my system and my marriage. You nailed the OCD condition.

  • @user-xx2hj7xb6b
    @user-xx2hj7xb6b Před 11 měsíci +2

    Most of my stuff I purchased years before my marriage, so it's been no problem as far as my spouse is concerned. Jay, I had to laugh when you talked about strange people coming into the house carrying boxes of equipment and focusing on and stressing over much of the time on the equipment.

  • @alvinnirenberg9167
    @alvinnirenberg9167 Před 11 měsíci +3

    Having been an audiophile for over 55 years ( yes I'm that old) I am shocked at what this hobby has become. Like so many other things in life, it has become a hobby of luxury goods where the more you pay, the less of an incremental improvement you get.
    When I started in the hobby the difference between decent entry level amplification (ie dynaco,) and high end amplification ( ie McIntosh) was a ratio of about 1 to 5 or 6. And gear in between had a reasonable proportion of sound quality.
    Now entry level to top high end can be well over a 1 to 100 ratio in price. Back then most all the gear served the music. Not so much anymore.
    Now we have $500,00 turntables, $1,000,000 speakers and so on. Much of it doesn't even sound musical.
    We also didn't have $20,000 interconnects, and $10,000 power conditioners and so on.
    In many ways this hobby has gotten simply ridiculous yet at the same time, wonderful sound for many can be gotten for less $$, and more easily accessed than ever before. Like many things, this some of this hobby has become a money pit for the uber rich.

    • @Nirvi1
      @Nirvi1 Před 11 měsíci +1

      It’s not just with audio. It can be with betting, golf (😂), cars, jewelry etc.
      I’m guilty in the golf department. I can see why with audio.

  • @maxhirsch7035
    @maxhirsch7035 Před 11 měsíci +2

    As someone who's intermittently struggled with 'audiophilia nervosa,' it's become clear to me - and this is crucial for many of us - that in the absence of an audio or music obsession, those of us (and that includes me) with more obsessive natures can easily find other obsessions and compulsions to which to latch on in the place of one let go- so for many out there, 'audio ocd' can be a symptom of a larger imbalance, and not 'the cause' of one's distress. Often better to look deeper than simply ending a problem obsession that one has!

  • @glichasasha750
    @glichasasha750 Před 11 měsíci +2

    For me the solution for this was very easy. I put the system in our living room for all of us to enjoy. The system however got in a bit of trouble. Supposedly, it was better to listen to it over a nice cup of coffee. I then bought an espresso machine and we all now enjoy music over many many cappuccinos. 😊

  • @AB-hx9hs
    @AB-hx9hs Před 11 měsíci +3

    I don't have this problem since I've no wife or GF. Thus no headaches and complete Peace.

  • @Random-kq4pz
    @Random-kq4pz Před 11 měsíci +8

    Obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, and depression are all streams that flow from the same spring. Tony Robbins said that the greatest happiness comes from relationships, and our audio hobby needs no relationships to be enjoyed, it is a really a solitary hobby, there is only one “sweet spot” to sit in. To get in the mindset that there is no “finish line”, that there is always something that can be done to the system to make it sound better is not healthy. We should lead a balanced life, where we do many different things and not focus on just one thing to the detriment of others. We would not want to eat just protein, we feel better on a balanced diet. A balanced life is key, no one thing should dominate our time. Now I have to go make sure I locked the door, and I need to try it several times to make sure it is truly locked and that I will remember it is locked. Control of things is paramount to relieving a little bit of anxiety. Rituals temporarily relieve stress too.

  • @oohtob6685
    @oohtob6685 Před 11 měsíci +4

    I finished with a partner because of my system.
    She irritated me over keep saying her 1k bose system was just as good. Had some real big arguments over it.

  • @robvandendolder3157
    @robvandendolder3157 Před 11 měsíci +4

    Thank you Jay for being so open and honest. Spoken from experiences. I realised earlier on that this could go out of control so I took a step back for a while and just enjoyed the music with what we had, which was already pretty good. Then my wife and I discussed about how far I wanted to go with this and to firmly stay grounded. Cheers Jay😎

  • @Romulus980
    @Romulus980 Před 11 měsíci +3

    Jay many thanks for being so brave and honest about the effects of this hobby which we all share in various degrees. I have a Bi Polar condition mainly I suffer from hyper mania. When I have watched many of your videos a strong common denominators run through, your pursuit of that perfect sound, your singular attention to detail, your limitless recources to get 'that latest component and your need to share your pursuit/journey with the rest of us. I have a feeling that the need to share your journey is the strongest compulsion for you.

  • @mahasidha9
    @mahasidha9 Před 11 měsíci +9

    Some people have called this “upgrade fever.” Frankly if people can afford the upgrades towards The Absolute Sound that is fine; I believe you can do BOTH; acquire new gear, appreciate the improvements AND enjoy those improvements as experienced through the music; Harry Pearson used to say you aren’t aware of the shortcomings of your system until something better comes along; thank God my wife sits with me and listens; when I met her she had 1000+ albums; she says I married her for her vinyl; thankfully she has great ears and can discern differences in audio shows; she didn’t think when we met that her LP’s could sound great; once we took them to audio shows her jaw dropped and understood; we are happy where we are system wise and yet we are about to add the Michi X-5 Series 2 integrated. We will never lose sight because first and foremost we are passionate about THE MUSIC; improvements to the system making THE MUSIC sound more real, all the better; more enjoyment! I dare say sitting on the couch together eyes closed listening is one of our most BONDING experiences we share. How many other subscribers listen with their wives who share the music as a mutual passion; I am certain there are more than you realize.

  • @Romad1981
    @Romad1981 Před 11 měsíci +12

    Jay, great video u are very honest. You have went to the extremes of spending the most money I have ever seen. You should have the best sounding system. What would be more fun is try to make the most musical system under 20 or 30K where most people can afford. I have been in this hobby over 40 years and what happens is we start chasing the equipment instead of enjoying the music. It happens to most of us. This hobby can get to be an addiction like a drug, its crazy we are all trying to build the best system, but there is no end. We have to go back to just enjoying the music and not go overboard. Spend more money on just building your vinyl collection than on equipment would be my advice.

    • @Coneman3
      @Coneman3 Před 11 měsíci +2

      Yes, £50k components are beyond the reach of most people and probably only very tiny amounts better than ones around £5k.

    • @brandonburr4900
      @brandonburr4900 Před 11 měsíci +1

      Some good advice. Some are more focused on the gear chasing than the music. On this channel it's more of the gear and stuff only the 1 percenters can afford. That's just being honest as I have other audio channels that focus on the music more than the gear. I mean that is what were all here for right?

  • @artyfhartie2269
    @artyfhartie2269 Před 11 měsíci +3

    I came home early one day and caught my wife playing with my high end hifi gear. I filed for divorce as I considered that both of them have been unfaithful to me. I now live happily with a beautiful Marantz AVR home video set up as I do not trust high end gear anymore. Call me anything but don't call me crazy.

  • @roberthoffecker7223
    @roberthoffecker7223 Před 11 měsíci +2

    Jay, don't get discouraged. I am really enjoying your journey through the hobby. Love seeing you try out Mac tubes, and vinyl. It reminds me of when I was your age. Don't forget it is about the music, and how it makes you feel. One suggestion...try some tube linestages like DeHavilland, Shindo, Audio Note (Japan), and roll some tubes. Should make great content, and great consternation.

  • @xeniavader
    @xeniavader Před 11 měsíci +1

    Buying and selling is fun. I've cut back, but still enjoy meeting other audiophiles, making good deals, and trying new stuff. Of course the music too ! ! ! I am not ashamed to admit I love the gear.

  • @triaz5124
    @triaz5124 Před 11 měsíci +3

    Just keep it simple. After all the running around, going nuts about the smallest details in this hobby, i've finally just got myself a simple set up of an integrated amp and speakers that i like plus a source or two. Not going to bother much about other stuff as long as i can sit down and enjoy my music. And if i can fall asleep while listening to my music/system. Thats good enough for me.

  • @Filippo-dg4oi
    @Filippo-dg4oi Před 11 měsíci +2

    Hi Jay thanks for your blood, sweat, and tears. Through your journey. I am grateful for your dedication and your unbiased nature. Ps do me this one thing don't change and stay real you are truly a great man

  • @hilldog3450
    @hilldog3450 Před 11 měsíci

    Love when he says “latest and greatest” and shows clip of cassette tape:)

  • @albertelazar4069
    @albertelazar4069 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Jay is 100 PERCENT RIGHT!
    Women don't GIVE A DAMN about Stereo's or speakers! Unless its a beautiful, wife friendly and sexy Sonus Faber speakers!
    If its a ugly Wilson Audio speaker that you're bringing home, be cautious to NOT leave it at home with her when you're away, she might just burn it, and trash it.

  • @Canadian_Eh_I
    @Canadian_Eh_I Před 11 měsíci +3

    This is very good advice. MODERATION used to be considered a virtue for a reason. Many of us have forgotten the value of it.

  • @anthonytrzupek9815
    @anthonytrzupek9815 Před 11 měsíci +2

    Jay - You should start a new AA (Audiophile Anonymous)

  • @Dano831
    @Dano831 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Watched several tubers in past weeks doing similar videos. Well done. This is a very real, important, and very common issue. Often it’s not realized until it’s too late and real damage is done.

  • @kuoviolin5913
    @kuoviolin5913 Před 10 měsíci

    To me a hifi system serves as a triggering device for my mirror neuron to the music being played, and through perception action coupling I get to perceive the beauty of the music, the brilliance of the player's performance, etc... So a better system might trigger more! There is an overlapping area between music lover and hifi lover.

  • @jamesschneider3828
    @jamesschneider3828 Před 11 měsíci +1

    It's sad that the system is the entertainment instead of the music. I personally enjoy my $5000 system, sitting back and enjoying a coffee or a glass of wine and listening to the music, not the system.

  • @djhose
    @djhose Před 11 měsíci

    Yes, I know that feeling. Meanwhile I don't listen to music anymore, I'm listening to the sound the music makes..

  • @tivanov5
    @tivanov5 Před 29 dny

    Hahahaha I 'm the same. That is why I changed the fuses for my audio room with Wi-Fi controled and easy can switch off when I'm away :)

  • @khaido7341
    @khaido7341 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Be a music lover,and not ocd about equipments.There is no absolute sound,just like foods.The law of diminishing return does apply.Once the system gives you the sound you like,you can stop chasing equipment s.Always use your ears to be the final arbiter.

  • @dma1264
    @dma1264 Před 11 měsíci +9

    "Audiophilia Nervosa" is real. When I started only listening to well recorded music, which some I didn't even like that much instead of listening to the music I loved because a lot of it wasn't well recorded/produced, I had to step back. Having OCD to begin with leads to the never-ending quest and that leads to feeling disillusioned. Thanks, Jay, for your honesty!

    • @michaelrosquist9965
      @michaelrosquist9965 Před 11 měsíci +2

      This is BY FAR my biggest paradoks, conflict of interest, "identity crisis" at the moment. I almost solely listen to well recorded music on my system.(Pass labs, Elac top of the line, Rel S510) Whereas in the car i listen to the music i grew up with, and im enjoying that tremendeously also. So im trying to get to terms with, thats just how it is. Cause fact is, most of the music i grew up with, grunge from the 90ties, rock in general 60-90ties will never sound amazing, on a good system, i quess not even on a decent system, cause its so horible horible produced. And since i really really dont want to give up, on the pleasure i get from the well produced recordings. Im faced with the task of accepting. But sometimes i do dream of a button on my system, we could call it "convert&soften" and with that pressed, i could enjoy all that horible produced music out there that i like. I quess like many im looking for that amazing system, that can blow your mind with good recordings but still deliver decent, food tapping result with less well recorded. Let me know if someone found ;-) that needle in a haystack 🙂

    • @dma1264
      @dma1264 Před 11 měsíci +3

      @@michaelrosquist9965 Same situation for me. My car stereo was giving me way more enjoyment at the time. For my home system, I had to go with a preamp that had, wait for it...tone controls! That's another hot button topic in high end audio. I learned that for me, the ultimate in high resolution had my ears bleeding. Tone controls or EQ was the way for me. I love high end audio, but it had to work for me. Not the other way around.

    • @Random-kq4pz
      @Random-kq4pz Před 11 měsíci +3

      @@dma1264 Tone controls can make more difference that any equipment can make. I don't understand why people don't use them (if they even have them).

  • @michaelmityok1001
    @michaelmityok1001 Před 11 měsíci +7

    Definitely a problem for me financially and in my personal life, much appreciated post Jay.

  • @raymondharding9557
    @raymondharding9557 Před 10 měsíci

    Thank you Jay, for your honesty. Just like anything it can be addictive and if not under control, it is just like gambling…. it will ruin you and your life.

  • @daimozu
    @daimozu Před 11 měsíci

    That's why I like McIntosh, it has "creature comfort", such as: auto off, powergard, etc, that most "audiophile" gears don't have.

  • @PGHJR002
    @PGHJR002 Před 9 měsíci

    Pick up a book, learn to play an instrument...it's all the same...you must share with your spouse and get them to understand YOUR joy. What motivates you, gives you strength, give yourself room to keep YOUR personality, strengthen your spirit, while respecting their love and devotion. Give them time to understand and they should do the same for you. MODERATION is the KEY here. Do not let a hobby become a life altering OBSESSION. Keep things under control, YOUR BUDGET, YOUR TIME, your self confidence; it's all under your control, not you controlled by the hobby. Besides, it saves a lot of resources of time and money, enjoying a concert at your leisure nightly if that's what you want; ENJOY it together! Avoid the VICIOIUS CYCLE of upgrade, repair and replace that too many people experience , which keeps the capitalist industry going, BUT, keeps you(and your spouse) worried over how you prioritize your time and money.

  • @Douglas_Blake_579
    @Douglas_Blake_579 Před 10 měsíci

    My system ... an endless bundle of joy .... An HTPC driving a small DAC driving a Class-D mini-amp driving a pair of Pioneer towers. Total investment? Less than $1,000.
    You see I simply don't care how resovling it is. I don't worry about cables and dodads and I have no need for "high end" anything. I bought reasonable components, hooked them up, played with speaker positions a bit and then just left it as it is.
    For entertainment, I walk over to my system, put on some music, and go do what I need to do. I will put on a movie in the evening and relax with friends to watch it.
    The system is NOT the centre of my universe. It is simply a means to bring good sounding music into my home.

  • @RP-ms7lu
    @RP-ms7lu Před 11 měsíci

    This bites much earlier and slowly grows on you. I started from my personal portable radio to denon amplifier ! The search of perfect sound and music never ends ! But it is expensive hobby for sure. Now I have decided to buy a new marantz amplifier and hopefully stop there ?

  • @fabieneldridge3414
    @fabieneldridge3414 Před 11 měsíci

    I have been listening to my Marantz 2325 , Klipsch k-horns and a set of Klipsch Belle’s. The amount of music to me is fantastic. For over 30 years they have served me well . I am very happy with my system. I know I have got my money worth. Know what you want and get it then enjoy it ! I haven’t turned my Marantz off for the past two months ! Problem free, a couple of bulbs out. It still Rocks ! I am as happy as a little pig in slop ! My family says please ! My room is double insulated and my stereo was made for the room it’s in. Be Happy , Celebrate Life ! Music 🎼 is life , like riding my motorcycle it frees your Soul ! Life is moments so try to make more good memories than bad ones ! Rock on with something you can turn on and not need a computer to enjoy it ! Watch Concerts together and listen with your system. Even my kids liked that when they were growing up . Enjoy quit over thinking it ! G D Bless you all Jay !

  • @Darkmatterme
    @Darkmatterme Před 11 měsíci +3

    My pre and power amplifier is always on, server is always on. It sounds beter 😅

    • @elitetrader5468
      @elitetrader5468 Před měsícem

      It is actually better for solid state gear to be left on 24/7. Temperature cycling shortens the lifespan of electronics. And of course the other benefit is your equipment is ready to go when needed.

  • @DaveSHarris
    @DaveSHarris Před 11 měsíci

    I’ve been through a ton of gear because I was interested in finding a sound I like. It was expensive and at times stressful, but I still spend time with the family because my system is in my office and I listen during the day whilst I’m working.
    Additionally I’ve spent a lot but I’ve kept it real and enjoy the music and buying music.

  • @sloboat55
    @sloboat55 Před 11 měsíci +1

    No guts. No glory. Excellent.

  • @sdgtech2
    @sdgtech2 Před 11 měsíci +1

    I know 2 people are going through a divorce right now because they can not stop putting $$$ in their systems. My equipment only worth $0.25M and all paid for and still happily married. I am considered myself very lucky

  • @jazz_addict7079
    @jazz_addict7079 Před 11 měsíci

    Props to you for daring to bring up the "elephant in the room" -- especially given that you are a dealer! This shows a lot of integrity on your part. And you are absolutely on target when you say this can be a problem at any price point. I've been there and it doesn't feel good. It's far better to be satisfied that one's system is "good enough" and to focus on enjoying music.

  • @jazzkatt7083
    @jazzkatt7083 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Jay. I I’m single so I don’t have those issues. However, I’d also believe some wives are happy that husbands have a hobby and stay out of their way!😅😅😅

  • @user-xx2hj7xb6b
    @user-xx2hj7xb6b Před 11 měsíci

    Everyone here knows how obsessive this hobby can be. The search for the holy grail can be an endless, very expensive thing, as addictive as nicotine in its own way. I've been there and still get a hankering for trading in or trading up. Fortunately, I'm still comfortable and impressed with what I have. Being retired and on a fixed income helps ground one to reality.

  • @laurelhardy4064
    @laurelhardy4064 Před 11 měsíci +29

    If your stereo system is responsible for you losing your marriage, then I would say that marriage wasn't worth keeping.

    • @rahliE777
      @rahliE777 Před 11 měsíci +7

      Sounds like someone either doesn’t have a stereo system or doesn’t have a wife.. If you prioritize your stereo system over your wife and family, you’re the one not worth keeping

    • @breakoutpete210
      @breakoutpete210 Před 11 měsíci +4

      @@rahliE777 ...a stereo system should not be the reason for a wife leaving. If she doesn't like it, or understand, then she can kick rocks...

    • @divertiti
      @divertiti Před 11 měsíci +4

      ​​@@breakoutpete210An inanimate object like a stereo can't be the reason, the real reason is a husband who obsesses about a hobby while neglecting his family, the real reason for leaving is having a horrible partner you can't count on.

    • @divertiti
      @divertiti Před 11 měsíci +1

      You're stereo system isn't responsible for your marriage, you are. You take your marriage, spouse and family for granted while endlessly feeding into an obsession and potentially being financially irresponsible, that's the real reason

    • @breakoutpete210
      @breakoutpete210 Před 11 měsíci +2

      @@divertiti… don’t be who you really are with your hobbies and passions, be an empty shell, and empty husk. Children don’t complain about your hobbies , the wife will as always, if she can’t accept your hobbies and passions, then she is with the wrong person…

  • @starker1971
    @starker1971 Před 11 měsíci

    Short of being obsessive about the power supply for your equipment, there is a fairly good solution. If you get an inline watt meter like killawat, you can start to learn the wattage your equipment pulls. You will then know what is safe to consolidate on a power strip. You can then use the power strip to start consolidate the power supply and likely enable yourself with only one switch to turn off that will guarantee success.
    Of course if you have equipment with clocks and memorized settings that need sustained standby power, this can be a deal breaker.

  • @bigjay1970
    @bigjay1970 Před 11 měsíci

    Just got done blasting AC DC on my 5.2 JBL system along with my darling wife. She enjoys the music while cleaning out the parrot cage. Can't imagine listening to that system! 🤯 Chloe my parrot was also dancing ecstatically enjoying the music! PS: That ghost of Johnny Cash music has to be the best produced/sounding whatever you want to call it produced music I ever heard!🤯 Made even Eric Clapton sound subpar!🤔🤫😝

  • @Michiel1972
    @Michiel1972 Před 11 měsíci

    Let me give a simple piece of advice. Make sure you choose a partner that has a hobby or interests. The problem is often that alot of partners can not entertain themselves. They have no interest in things whatsoever. So they are bored out and expect from the other to spend as much time with them to keep them occupied. In general men can entertain themselves, but women can't. Most women want to talk talk talk talk talk and talk. They are addicted to communication. While men in general are kinda authistic. They can spend hours and hours noodling on their guitar for example or building something.

  • @CaptainJamesTKirk-en4kt
    @CaptainJamesTKirk-en4kt Před 11 měsíci

    I agree with some of your statements, enjoying this hobby with family members (maybe) on the Home Theater side.. My Wife has OCD, I do not, I never worry about leaving an Amp on or lights on, and never have, well maybe an old Class A Amp, sucks too much power! I enjoy the music more but I have been a Flipper and it feeds my hobby of course "its a flipping hobby"! I know guys that spend hundreds of thousands a dollars on vintage cars a year again it's a hobby! I can hear the differences in Mid-Fi and HiFi at times are marginal gains at best in sound, when you get to HiFi and Mega HiFi, incremental gains in sound. When I close my door and walk away from my HT and Audio Room, I concentrate on other matters. I agree on the Wife end, wife could care less, she is fine listening to music on an Amazon Echo. Lately I am spending more time "actually" going to concerts with my wife, I do listen late at night because I don't have to worry about her or my family needs. I call this "Family Therapy", everyone needs alone time! LOL I find it funny on how you say people obsessive over it (Most serious hobbyist) do this, my wife obsessive over hand bags and shoes, and 6 Amazon deliveries a day, lol! My wife understands, I use to work at a store for fun when we met and by selling gear off it helped us get a huge downpayment on a house 20+ years ago, so she is fine with it to a certain extent. Now I am trying to focus more on live music, also when Covid hit, it helped keep me sane! ;) The only major negative factor it has had on me is obsessing over the "next" best thing and better equipment, but when you get to a certain level, the equipment isn't really any better, it just sounds different. I need to re-focus on the music and the enjoyment of that, but people get that "Christmas high" another new piece of equipment arriving starts to trump everything else. If it gets to the point where I want to spend more time in my basement and not going to my kids soccer or CC events, then I know it will be time to hang it up for awhile, thankfully it hasn't come to that.

  • @Derffee
    @Derffee Před 11 měsíci

    Years ago, there was a girl who i fancied anyway one night I dreamt that we was going out with each other and she moved in with me and then one day I came home from work and found out she had sold my hi-fi system and my record collection after that dream I did not fancy her anymore, and it has put me off dating algether

  • @goncalocarvalho4917
    @goncalocarvalho4917 Před 8 měsíci

    Good video , for me the only great positive my system has over my girlfriend/wife is that when I want some peace and quiet e can just turn it off

  • @tikblang1
    @tikblang1 Před 10 měsíci

    It's part of truly living.. improve your singing and music and serenade your significant other (partner) and work your ass off to support your hobby. I'm pretty sure there will be a middle ground you can both agree, the point is communicate!

  • @77MovieFan
    @77MovieFan Před 11 měsíci +3

    I guess I did it different
    I bought my stuff after much much much research and am totally happy with it and ended all my research for hardware.
    Instead I do research artists none stop, buying records all the time, research different pressings, entire discography ... ALL DAY LONG i do this and waiting for delivery.
    After that everythings gets listened to as soon as possible

  • @itk2493
    @itk2493 Před 11 měsíci

    I agree I have terrible OCD, I can't sleep at night wondering how to get those blacker blacks, all night turning from side to side on how to make the soundstage 1mm wider. I even went on holiday and came back half way through as I thought I might have the put the wrong fuse in that made me lost that 1 mm of depth to the soundscape. I then went out and bought an Eversolo and all my OCD problems were cured.

  • @TheKent2288
    @TheKent2288 Před 11 měsíci +2

    Thanks Jay. Keep keeping it real and from the good place in your heart. We need more people like you in our hobby/addiction/passion 😊 Been long time subscriber and happy to see your channel growing.

  • @tubefreeeasy
    @tubefreeeasy Před 11 měsíci +1

    I replaced my main cable with a pure silver cable.
    I swear I’m out of the rabbit hole.
    I may just watch CZcams videos but, I’m seriously done done done.
    Well…with my main system.

  • @andrewm8831
    @andrewm8831 Před 11 měsíci

    Interesting and thought provoking , entered an audio competition a few ago,and I sort of skirted round this,I use my system mainly as an add on to my TV viewing ,that way everyone can share the experience

  • @MichaelM-to4sg
    @MichaelM-to4sg Před 11 měsíci +1

    I would think it’s hard to maintain music as a hobby if it’s not something your entire family is engaged in.
    I grew up with my mom playing piano in a bar she ran and that we lived upstairs. My dad always had a guitar with him as he was on the ocean for weeks on end as a tuna fisherman. I learned guitar from age 6 and really never stopped for 58 years now. I bought my 1st audiophile system in 81, one of first items I bought out of college. When I married my wife, it was first time I lived with someone who did not play an instrument. She would occasionally listen to music with me but typically played with kids in other room or read a book. One of our biggest arguments we ever had was my desire for our 2 kids to take music lessons and buy a baby grand piano. When we divorced and I obtained full custody, I bought a piano that my daughter wanted. My son tried playing piano but ventured more toward guitar but that only lasted a few years. Today my son has much of my old gear in his home, he loves music and has a guitar he occasionally plays. My daughter has our old piano in her home, plays regularly and is teaching my grandson to play. She however does not have or want an audiophile system, a pretty basic Sonos system is good enough.
    My partner and I met 2 years after my divorce at a ‘music night’ I did with friends where once a month we met at one of our homes and played music, sang, drank, etc. We’ve been together 19 years this past May, she plays piano, violin and flute, we have full size grand piano’s at each of our homes. We spend 12-15 hours/wk listening to music together. We travel often to music festivals and to favorite operas. We don’t always listen together, there’s times she’s listening and I just need to chill with book and our dogs on my hammock. Other times I’m listening and she’ll get up, put on her trainers and go for a run.
    While I admit many audio shows are dominated by males, music is the voice of the soul and impassioned by most persons; it is completely gender neutral. When we moved to our ranch near Boulder, we found a vibrant music community and decided to resurrect our ‘music nights’. We host these monthly, in fact we have one this Saturday. People bring music, instruments if they play and often a bottle of wine. From late afternoon we begin w/hors d’oeuvers, wine and live music. We eventually move it indoors, sometimes continuing to play instruments but usually the audio system comes on and people start introducing the music. Sometimes it’s new or relatively new pop, mostly it’s rare old recordings. I have turntable w/2 arms, to accommodate stereo and mono recordings. I have Ampex reel-reel, cd transport, dac and streamer to accommodate most any source material. The parties often go until very late evening, most end up spending the night. The entire group is made up of couples, one of the couples is lesbian this women outnumber men and there’s commonly only myself and 2 other men who play instruments. It’s a fabulous time that we started 2 years ago here at end of pandemic.
    I would encourage you to find ways to engage musically with your partner. It’s really one of the most rewarding experiences to share with your significant other.

  • @robertthurston6858
    @robertthurston6858 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Jesus man, I don’t have any of these problems you mentioned. Maybe this OCD complex you mentioned is a mental disorder and to more than just the Audio equipment hobby and something they do in all things in their lives? Maybe they should look into DIY if they’re that tweaked out and then CHILL OUT ? ✌️

  • @lichtgestalt9540
    @lichtgestalt9540 Před 11 měsíci +1

    people, don‘t buy class A amplifiers, then you don‘t need to switch off and have nightmares about this. my systems are always running 24/7, only when i go in hollidays, i turn it off 😉

  • @elitetrader5468
    @elitetrader5468 Před měsícem

    That's funny. I leave all my equipment on 24/7 on purpose. But all my gear is solid state.

  • @datka3
    @datka3 Před 11 měsíci

    Damn I have 2 expensive hobbies, car is second one , :
    1 . Turn off your entire system for a week completely, it helps you to reset your ears and relationships.
    2 get her some nice present every time you bring that big box of whatever.
    At the end it’s and addiction and sooner you admit it and start managing better it is . 🍺

  • @allardvanderstarre5238
    @allardvanderstarre5238 Před 11 měsíci

    one law : diminishing returns; which also means we run out of time (we will die) /money/space...power limitations just to name a few

  • @beornthebear.8220
    @beornthebear.8220 Před 11 měsíci

    I know sound I like and sound I don't like. It has nothing to do with the cost of the equipment; I've been blasting my ears for years, and probably have an audio range of about 27 to 15k Hz. I play bass and some guitar, and am not gentle with the volume. However, there are certain things that my ears like. Even though I might not have the hearing range of a younger person, I like clarity, depth and positioning in my sound. I have have an old Sony 200 watt stereo receiver, and some old Pioneer 12” 3 way speakers that cost me about $80 per, 40 years ago. They sound good to me, are very clear, and with good toe-in give me good imaging. I also listen mostly to my headphones, that are Sennheiser HD 600s (pretty good). Beyerdynamic DT 880 Pro’s ( I really like them) and Beyerdynamic 1770 Pro’s (they’re OK). I listen through a pretty good DAC and headphone amp. I’ve heard systems that have amazed my because of their projection (AMT 1b’s with Heil air motion transformers) that projected to other sides of the room. When I bought my speakers, I tested against ones that were “phase aligned”, and there was no comparison, the Pioneers sounded MUCH better. I’ve heard some really amazing systems on line that were binaurally recorded, and many sound superb. I can’t pretend to have the money to buy them. And even now, which headphones on, I will take them off and investigate if something sounds out of place.

  • @charlesf2804
    @charlesf2804 Před 11 měsíci

    I don't have a wife, children or girlfriend, but obsession wouldn't require it. If you're that far into the hobby, there are other issues at work. I'd think ANY hobby could be taken too far. I may have the opposite issue. I have a decent system that I barely play anymore. That means I'm out of balance. I shouldn't be coming to CZcams to listen to music; it's easy and convenient, but it's not the same as listening to the same music on my system. The perception of time is one issue, and not feeling as if I have it to spend with the stereo. That's one reason I have so many LPs I haven't played or even opened; fatigue is another. This is a good "makes me think" video. Thanks.

  • @pizzaearthpancakesandother2549
    @pizzaearthpancakesandother2549 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Dude "OCD" is the IP of OCD Mikey.
    If you use it you should credit him during the video, it's only fair.

  • @raypetro
    @raypetro Před 11 měsíci

    You have big kahunas bringing this topic up. It is so true I already lost my wife and my children but I have all Macintosh components and that makes me happier than my wife and children . I lost my parents to some Wilson Speakers I second mortgage to their house and I lost it but at least I have some hundred thousand dollar speakers. But they still don’t sound right because I can only spend $50,000 on speaker cable. I need the hundred thousand dollar speaker cable the one that is wrapped in ice and comes with that whole refrigeration unit that keeps the wires frozen to keep the impedance down below freezing levels. It’s all about the love of the sound, screw those people they didn’t mean anything to me

  • @No_Limits_411
    @No_Limits_411 Před 11 měsíci

    It's a very good topic. I find it very important not to overspend, that also is a problem for many. Especially when you can not afford.

  • @Foxrock321
    @Foxrock321 Před 11 měsíci

    My wife occasionally will come in to my listening room, but she has a sewing studio to work on her creations…so we both have our time with our “passions”…and yes I have the illness as well I have now 5 complete systems, 4 vintage, one new. And getting that next box past my wife,..from EBay is a challenge…ha ha

  • @piker3000
    @piker3000 Před 11 měsíci +3

    I seem to agree. My system was very high performing and expensive and while I’m happy with it, I find I’m happiest with my music when listening through headphones late at night before bed. Really considering selling my 2 channel setup and only having a nice headphone and amp like an Astell & Kern … it would be a much better experience and removes my room issues. Curious how many of your listeners primarily listens over headphones.

    • @nathanbell6962
      @nathanbell6962 Před 11 měsíci +2

      Sometimes I sit in the kitchen with my Bose Bluetooth speaker just to avoid my main rig

    • @rolandlickert2904
      @rolandlickert2904 Před 11 měsíci +1

      As I got older listened to Headphones and DAP players more and more. You have flexibility and don't disturb anyone. The Music feels very close and detailed which a system can not always reveal! Besides that, you do not have to spend that much money to get great sound!

  • @Rockit66
    @Rockit66 Před 11 měsíci

    True true. luckily I find this hobby interesting and annoying at the same time. All I want is a stereo that can accomplish what my JBL boom box does. Give clear music with a punchy bass that hits from the mids to low mids, but in a proper setup with deeper lower bass to fill the room. I have almost got that but it seems to me that most speaker vendors cant mash up this properly in one. Therefore the quest has not yet ended, but I am pretty satisfied with what I got now, and do not have to waste my time tweaking as I see there is no more tweaking to be done to get what I am looking for. And I hate tweaking actually. I just want my system to sound good with anything I put on so I can enjoy the music, and I am done wasting money, and will not sell anything before I have heard an confirmed that the next speakers will deliver properly.
    I neither do believe that more expensive equipment will solve this, cause I have tried that path, and usually more expensive speakers supposedly need more power, the correct amp and pre amp and so on jada jada. Some truth to it, but it should be possible with less like my boombox.

  • @Steve-cw1zo
    @Steve-cw1zo Před 11 měsíci

    Jay, I’ve watched your channel from the beginning. Your video’s very informative, however, comparing 500k systems month every month gets old. A format change is way overdue. May I suggest DIY projects to grow your viewer base. Much respect for all your hard work and dedication to this channel.

  • @rickp6303
    @rickp6303 Před 11 měsíci

    Stratton Acoustics Elypsis 1512 Loudspeakers are very Addictive

  • @extremumone
    @extremumone Před 10 měsíci

    just buy B&O 90 system and stop
    (sorry bro, your findings are true and precious. the whole issue is deep, not only with audio aquipment. B&O and BOSE are a absolute point of ridicule in audio equpment field, I couldn't help myself from adding a joke)

  • @keytrackmusicreviews
    @keytrackmusicreviews Před 11 měsíci

    Is obsession interchangeable with addiction? My first year of hi-fi life was an addiction! Some days I'm happy to have a budget that limits my gear and allows my mind to stay on the discovery of music. Stay cool, Jay.

  • @pierregourde326
    @pierregourde326 Před 11 měsíci

    Switching my focus from gears to music helped me.

  • @davidpetersen7091
    @davidpetersen7091 Před 11 měsíci

    Well done!
    Mr. Pete---------->
    aging hippie

  • @Greenapul
    @Greenapul Před 11 měsíci +1

    Good job! This is why I gave up on the hobby when the kids were growing up. Now I’m back into it, many hours on end. Not super expensive gear though.

  • @crazyprayingmantis5596
    @crazyprayingmantis5596 Před 11 měsíci

    Here's a crazy idea.
    Sell all your stuff
    Get a pair of speakers under 1k, plug it into a decent integrated amp unger 1k
    And
    ENJOY listening to the music you like, not the music that sounds good on your system

  • @ashred9665
    @ashred9665 Před 11 měsíci +2

    Jay, your honesty is refreshing. Cheers!

  • @ozkaar5287
    @ozkaar5287 Před 11 měsíci

    Perfectionists all go through this obsessive path. Preferring to enjoy the music should tame the itch and bring one back to sanity.

  • @anthonymoore1175
    @anthonymoore1175 Před 11 měsíci

    The best thing you have done!

  • @brianshoaf9026
    @brianshoaf9026 Před 11 měsíci +1

    my wife loves thy system... .this can be dangerous as well... as she does not stop me from purchasing LOL : )

  • @gadymarcus2362
    @gadymarcus2362 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Magnifico.💪💪💪💪💪💪

  • @craig9242
    @craig9242 Před 11 měsíci

    The other side of the coin of course that many will be thinking out there in the hobby, is do I really need a significant other?

    • @elitetrader5468
      @elitetrader5468 Před měsícem

      The old saying of women, can't live with them, can't live without them is mostly true.

  • @cd-rom.
    @cd-rom. Před 11 měsíci +1

    Great topic

  • @ericlubow4354
    @ericlubow4354 Před 11 měsíci +3

    Jay- you seem to be saying it’s ok if you’re obsessed with your system and not spending time with your wife and kids as long as long as it’s a business, as long as you’re doing it for the money. Does this really help a marriage? Sure, your wife may understand that you’re doing this to support your family financially. But will she truly be any happier knowing that she’ll rarely see you, that you’re spending less and less time with them? I think what you’re saying is that it’s ok to be obsessed as long as you’re making money. I really don’t think this is the way to mental health. Why not advise those who want to give up the hobby to seek help, therapy of some kind instead of telling them to ditch their equipment, throw it all away to save their marriage.? Surely there must be some in between, some compromise. In your quest to “tell it like it is”, to be totally honest, I think you’ve neglected to highlight the core issue: communication between you and your spouse which may involve therapy for both. People do get over obsessions.

  • @sonnysaint23
    @sonnysaint23 Před 11 měsíci +1

    It never end 😀

  • @jennessayong340
    @jennessayong340 Před 7 měsíci

    I am very Irritated with my father who is into this hobby. He does not talk to us and he gets irritated when my mother talks to him as he is working on tweaking his system. He tweaks his system every day after comming home from work and blasts the music so loud to the extent I can hear the music loud and clear even with the doors closed. I thought a hobby shouldn't cause discomfort to others around, a hobby should be something positive and fun that adds value to your life. How I see this hobby is doing to my father is distancing himself from us, we tried to talk and all he does is get offended and accused us of not being able to understand him or his hobby. The way he gets offended really disappoints me. All we wanted was ask him to stop spending that much over the system and try to be satisfied with what he already has and just enjoy the music with a lower volume. But he cant, he takes everything as an attack to stop him from enjoying his hobby the way he wants.

  • @mrk8212
    @mrk8212 Před 11 měsíci +1

    My wife thinks a Bose wave radio is expensive audio gear. I am ready to upgrade my speakers, have a great deal lined up, but have a knot in my stomach anticipating the conversation. Money is not the problem, spending it on audio seems to be a problem though.

    • @FJBx100
      @FJBx100 Před 11 měsíci

      Dude, I feel your pain for sure. My method was to prepare weeks or days in advance by dropping subtle hints. Frankly, it ain't easy.

    • @elitetrader5468
      @elitetrader5468 Před měsícem

      This is why you should have separate bank accounts. Rule number one in a relationship. Buy what you want and be a man.

  • @JeffAdairKTM530
    @JeffAdairKTM530 Před 11 měsíci

    great video and I can relate. I lost a 15-year relationship because of my addiction to audio.

  • @pullrich001
    @pullrich001 Před 11 měsíci

    Sorry but this is a WEIRD video. There are plenty of issues with this industry, but I don't think OCD (did I leave the amp on?) or did I spend enough time with my family (a time management thing) are universal problems. One is there are too many snobs and snake oil salesmen just trying to sell more boxes. Another is using an entire room just to setup your gear. My recommendation is 1. Spend around $2-3K on a system (after that, the law of diminishing returns rapidly kicks in), 2. Make sure it asthetically fits in the listening environment, and 3. Spend more time finding music you like and actually listening instead of constantly worrying about the sound. Or even better, get a pair of good wired earbuds (like the Moondrops) and you will hear details that would not be possible in a traditional system.

    • @elitetrader5468
      @elitetrader5468 Před měsícem

      $3K on an entire system? LOL. Don't get me wrong, I'm not advocating for a 7 figure system, but let's get real.

  • @mw4609
    @mw4609 Před 11 měsíci

    Awesome, thanks Jay.

  • @genel6830
    @genel6830 Před 10 měsíci

    Love the video, Jay. Great advice!

  • @tonywheeler917
    @tonywheeler917 Před 11 měsíci +2

    I promised my wife I was done. She didn't believe me. She says I will change something. Now I can't change anything because I'm determined to prove her wrong.

  • @rolandlickert2904
    @rolandlickert2904 Před 11 měsíci

    I gave up searching for the holy grail a while ago! Now I am 74 years old I look for convenience easy set-up, avoid cable salad and listen to good music.

  • @mikegoddard7354
    @mikegoddard7354 Před 11 měsíci +1

    OCD is an understatement. I'm just above the average joe tier in stereo audio, in addition I am cracked on headphones and home theater. Which is why I got into stereo. I have spend more money in the three years of the hobby, just hit the three year mark, than most people spend in their first decade.
    Fortunately my girlfriend is very supportive and also enjoys audio now too. My entire place is an audio graveyard, I have so much crap sitting just idle because all I wanted as a new audio enthusiast is to try new things and see what's out there. Purely experience.
    I believe there are two types of people, the one who seeks to upgrade and get better sound followed by those who love the hobby so much they wish to try different things and learn especially in the beginning phase.
    I watch a lot of reviewers and it's not really to buy products, but rather to see what's out there and learn. Including you Jay, and even though I cant afford the things you got it brings me great pleasure to watch and see the possibilities. I love it all from dirt cheap to ultra high end.
    I got audio in every room of my house, 2 HT set ups, 3 stereo set ups. I dont bring many friends over, but when people come they are like wow this is amazing. I want this too, and I tell them to stay far away from this hobby and they think I am nuts, and the reason behind it is cause I know how consuming and draining this hobby can be. I wouldn't want anyone else I know to get so deep into this without the means to support it and very highly likely can put someone into debt or the things you mentioned above.
    Fortunately I have not had the issues you are mentioning, but that maybe because that is how I am in general being fairly organized and I dont ponder. But like you said it's almost like you cant stop looking or watching or wondering. Even though I got the money I am currently going on 2 months, which is technically insane if you think about it, of not buying anything audio related in the past 3 years. Almost like a detox because before this I would buy crap 2-3 times a month. I really jumped on this and decided to put my foot down cause I actually have so much new crap in boxes that I haven't opened or used for months after purchasing it because there's literally no where to add any more audio to my home.
    My home for sometime almost resembled a small audio shop, until I had a sell off cause it was too much.