I used to work under the umbrella of CPS. I wasn't an investigator, I supervised visitations between foster children and their bio parents / families. What she's saying is 100% true. Honestly, it was the most exhausting (emotionally and physically) job I've ever had. I went into it, thinking most of the parents were just down on their luck, but they really cared about their kids. In my experience that wasn't true. Out of all the cases I worked, the vast majority of them did not care about their children. I'll never forget one mom who found out they were pursuing termination of parental rights and she acted like they just told her about the weather (which lined up with how she'd been acting for months). Some genuinely did care and worked their butts off to change things, but those were few and far between. I finally got tired of it and went to work at Starbucks. I went from being hated by every client I saw to being a bright spot in someone's day as a barista.
The box cutter lady, if i remember right, was her high school boyfriend's ex. Years later, Mary was at home and something happened. I wish I had the link to the video but no 🤔
You can’t just leave us hanging with the door kicking story! If it’s something you’d be comfortable sharing I’d love a story time haha! Also I know these sort of jobs are thankless but it needs to be done. You would have made such a difference to some kids who really needed someone looking out for them, which is amazing ❤
I swear, your autobiography would be a hoot to read. You've led an interesting life just based on the stories you've shared. I would love to hear more about the time you were in the cult. Like how did they suck you in and get you to join?
Children need to be loved and valued everyday of their lives. It is disgusting how there can be people out there who can intentionally harm a child. They need to be looked out for and cherished. Not abused in anyway. You were a guardian angel to more than one child Mary.
Mary you are amazing. I was a special needs paraeducator for schools for five years. I personally had to call cps once. It was a very difficult call to make but turned out to be the right one.
CPS needs to distinguish between a serious matter and a matter of being called out of spite. People abuse CPS when they feel some type of way with no cause and in those cases, charges should be brought up. But by all means protect all kids. Great content!
It may not even be out of spite. Sometimes a family member may just not like your 'lifestyle'. For example, if you're unmarried or unemployed/disabled. And if they find a likeminded CP worker, it's way too easily for them to team up and slander/libel. Completely wrecking your good character, without a shred of evidence.
@@keepitreal5941 I have a physical disability and social services tried to use that against me by claiming I was incapable of meeting my children’s needs. The judge shot that down but I was very lucky to have a good judge. It could, far too easily, have gone very differently.
Going through such a hard time in life right now, especially this week, and a storytime video from you is JUST what I needed for a distraction. Thank you, Mary! 😊
I just came across your channel and love it! My mom is retired from CPS (also DFPS and several other names in Texas) after almost 40 years. She had many different titles. Our goal is to write a book of her stories under a pen name, of course. I’m glad you brought up that lawyers aren’t fans of CPS, either. They like you as a person, but don’t like going up against CPS in court. People have no idea that CPS has laws to abide by and judges make the ultimate decisions. Her first job out of college was as a head start teacher and she met my daddy who was the police officer who came to show the students the car and talk to them. I’m definitely fluent in dark humor and the impersonation of clients trying to figure out who reported them made me laugh.
Oh, and people who think you get paid for removing a child are too much. You want reports to turn out to be absolutely nothing. The list of what has to be done within 72 hours of removing a child is almost impossible to complete. You can’t have a life. I have no idea how my parents did it. My mom says they did what they felt called to do. Have you thought about Googling the name of the child you still wonder about since they are now an adult? Thank goodness you were willing to be a CPS investigator for even a short period of time.
Thank you for sharing your experience, very interesting to listen to. I'm mid 20s now, and work in safeguarding in drug and alcohol services, so have made a fair few referrals to adult and children's social care (here in the UK). Agree with so many of the things you said: the workload, the stress, all the questioning... I get comments all the time "how old are you? / Do you have kids? / You don't know anything, you don't have an addiction" I do find my role fulfilling but equally I don't see myself being able to do it years from now....
I have experience of CPS having very dangerous bias. She had it in for me being disabled, unemployed & a single mother who used a sperm donor. She was so biased she would've been happy to put my child under a roof with my mother, who had let us be regularly beaten up by our drunk father. As well as my brother who SAd me as a child daily. And the CPS worker felt qualified to claim this fact was untrue. Without even speaking to me. Just because he agreed to take a lie detector test (which he didn't take). As reasonably intelligent people, we all know lie detectors can be passed. If you don't believe in them, then they don't work. She would've been happy taking my child and putting her under a roof with my mother + brother. And she demanded they both regularly saw my child, without me present. I'm not going to list all the horrific things the worker did because there was too much & you wouldn't believe me. But suffice to say she even managed to prevent herself being investigated. Ironically purely because I had won a previous complaint. She was allowed to claim a future win might hinder her 'work' AKA prevent her fabricating concern. I truly fear for any child/parent she had access to. She completely went against all my child's wishes. And although we won in court, the worker still tormented my child throughout her childhood. Even after a judge told her to stop and ordered CPS to leave us alone. Had she enacted her reign of terror on someone with fewer coping skills, they may not have survived. Be that the child or the parent. Sadly I know of at least one case at the time, where a disabled mother was bullied by CPS so badly that she didn't survive. Cases such as that tend to have gaging orders. So that will be just the tip of the iceberg.
I feel you pain. I have a physical disability and was a single parent. Social services tried to use that against me and wanted to place my children with an ex, who was not the father and WAS a registered sex offender!! They said “a bad dad is better than no dad”. They took a child with a chronic condition off their medication without ever talking to a doctor, withheld medical care when that same child ended up with a broken arm while in foster care (the details of that injury remain sketchy) and refused to take the child to the orthopaedic surgeon when they were told the arm must be seen within 24 hours. I had to take the child when I got them back two months later and the arm was permanently damaged. The list goes on and on. The only reason we survived the situation was because we got very lucky and had a good judge.
I just started as a cps worker 3 weeks ago and I’m looking for a new job already. This work is not for everyone. Everything you shared remains the same except the case loads are overwhelming. I just can’t.
My ex is a dfs lawyer, wouldn’t wish that job or a case worker job on anyone. The politics of it all and the push to reunite families at the detriment of the child was super frustrating to hear about.
Such an important job, there needs to be protection for the employees though!! You became an even better person for taking on such a role in the lives of others. Wow ❤
I studied criminology at university. When I was in high school everyone said you have to choose a major that you find very interesting otherwise you won’t graduate. Well my choice was criminology en I loved to learn about it. University was a good time but nobody said anything about the jobs after your degree…. I absolutely hate the jobs in my field like this job you’re talking about. I absolutely agree, everyone hates you all the time. Its so hard to be happy….
I believe you may be one of the good ones. You say you are all trying to work yourselves out of a job. I get that concept. However I have heard that the agencies get more money/funding when they remove children from their homes, and raises are also affected by this. Is there any truth to that? Also, can you do a video about what our rights as parents are? As good parents, one of all of our fears is a bogus DCF complaint gone bad.
Once when I was a kid the doctors called CPS because in their eyes I “fell down the stairs and hurt my leg”…. Except I actually did 😅 I was cagey when the docs asked what happened because I was told not to jump down for a thrill and I did it anyway. I kept saying I fell to avoid getting in trouble haha CPS figured that out immediately of course, and even though it gave my ma a good scare we’re still really grateful they were there in case the quotes were necessary!
I have many examples who neighbors tried to accused parents for hurting their kids, only because they don't like them, which of course was all lies.Here in Greece is the same the half of these are lies, by people who hate their neighbors or relatives.😮With this story you reminded me those.I have an example with a close friend...is so frustrating..of course the haters call anonymously...
I must say good for you because that does not seem like a easy job but i’m sure the children felt safe around you. You probably made a very big difference even if it was for a moment. 🙂
Some many families shouldn't be held together, this only deteriorates the children's state. the community system is just as neglectful, just for a slightly different target of people.
The fact that women are sent into super volatile homes and situations without any personal protection is insane. They should be able to carry mace at least. That’s a dangerous job! Things can happen very quickly too and the people can be on substances and very unpredictable.
I had someone call cps on me because they didn’t like my bf …. When the cps worker calls she mentions something about my daughters birthday invitations lmao it basically narrowed down who called cause the party hadn’t happened yet and I only invited a handful of ppl ……still waiting for there karma …. And they closed the cps case cause there was nothing lol
My mother did the same thing when I moved out and got married because she was jealous. She wouldn’t disclose where she was taking my son and would never bring him back home on time so when I stopped letting her pick him up she called them on me. Needless to say I WILL NEVER have a relationship with her again.
Oooh I also wanna add a tid bit that in a lot of places, a CPS caseworker isn’t necessarily a Social Worker. Here in TX, any degree can get you a job with CPS. A social worker requires a BSW/MSW and licensure 🤍
I used to work under the umbrella of CPS. I wasn't an investigator, I supervised visitations between foster children and their bio parents / families. What she's saying is 100% true. Honestly, it was the most exhausting (emotionally and physically) job I've ever had. I went into it, thinking most of the parents were just down on their luck, but they really cared about their kids. In my experience that wasn't true. Out of all the cases I worked, the vast majority of them did not care about their children. I'll never forget one mom who found out they were pursuing termination of parental rights and she acted like they just told her about the weather (which lined up with how she'd been acting for months). Some genuinely did care and worked their butts off to change things, but those were few and far between. I finally got tired of it and went to work at Starbucks. I went from being hated by every client I saw to being a bright spot in someone's day as a barista.
If you put more of your life history into a book Mary , I’d read it ! This was so interesting, more please, including the ‘box cutter ‘ story ! ❤
The box cutter lady, if i remember right, was her high school boyfriend's ex. Years later, Mary was at home and something happened. I wish I had the link to the video but no 🤔
Thank you for letting me know ! Sounds scary ! X
You can’t just leave us hanging with the door kicking story! If it’s something you’d be comfortable sharing I’d love a story time haha!
Also I know these sort of jobs are thankless but it needs to be done. You would have made such a difference to some kids who really needed someone looking out for them, which is amazing ❤
She posted it 4 days ago! :) It’s called ‘Bedtime Stories My ex Fiancé’s Wife’ or something like that!!
I swear, your autobiography would be a hoot to read. You've led an interesting life just based on the stories you've shared. I would love to hear more about the time you were in the cult. Like how did they suck you in and get you to join?
Children need to be loved and valued everyday of their lives. It is disgusting how there can be people out there who can intentionally harm a child. They need to be looked out for and cherished. Not abused in anyway. You were a guardian angel to more than one child Mary.
It's not "there can be" people like that, THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE THAT.
Genuinely could listen to you speak for hours upon hours. So interesting
Mary you are amazing. I was a special needs paraeducator for schools for five years. I personally had to call cps once. It was a very difficult call to make but turned out to be the right one.
CPS needs to distinguish between a serious matter and a matter of being called out of spite. People abuse CPS when they feel some type of way with no cause and in those cases, charges should be brought up. But by all means protect all kids. Great content!
It may not even be out of spite. Sometimes a family member may just not like your 'lifestyle'. For example, if you're unmarried or unemployed/disabled. And if they find a likeminded CP worker, it's way too easily for them to team up and slander/libel. Completely wrecking your good character, without a shred of evidence.
Calling CPS with a false report should carry the same penalties as SWATting someone.
@@keepitreal5941 I have a physical disability and social services tried to use that against me by claiming I was incapable of meeting my children’s needs. The judge shot that down but I was very lucky to have a good judge. It could, far too easily, have gone very differently.
much respect to you for being able to do such a tough job
Bless everyone who can do this line of work! I wish our society valued children more.
Going through such a hard time in life right now, especially this week, and a storytime video from you is JUST what I needed for a distraction. Thank you, Mary! 😊
I just came across your channel and love it! My mom is retired from CPS (also DFPS and several other names in Texas) after almost 40 years. She had many different titles. Our goal is to write a book of her stories under a pen name, of course. I’m glad you brought up that lawyers aren’t fans of CPS, either. They like you as a person, but don’t like going up against CPS in court. People have no idea that CPS has laws to abide by and judges make the ultimate decisions. Her first job out of college was as a head start teacher and she met my daddy who was the police officer who came to show the students the car and talk to them. I’m definitely fluent in dark humor and the impersonation of clients trying to figure out who reported them made me laugh.
Oh, and people who think you get paid for removing a child are too much. You want reports to turn out to be absolutely nothing. The list of what has to be done within 72 hours of removing a child is almost impossible to complete. You can’t have a life. I have no idea how my parents did it. My mom says they did what they felt called to do.
Have you thought about Googling the name of the child you still wonder about since they are now an adult? Thank goodness you were willing to be a CPS investigator for even a short period of time.
Thank you so much, Mary, for continuing to provide amazing content!! I love to hear you talk so very much. ❤
UMMMMM. Of course we wanna hear about the crazy lady with a box cutter!!
I enjoy these everyday Mary videos so much, I want you to not be burnt out but I also want to listen to your talk all the time. 😭❤️
I always love your life stories and your wisdom. 😊
Thank you for sharing your experience, very interesting to listen to.
I'm mid 20s now, and work in safeguarding in drug and alcohol services, so have made a fair few referrals to adult and children's social care (here in the UK). Agree with so many of the things you said: the workload, the stress, all the questioning... I get comments all the time "how old are you? / Do you have kids? /
You don't know anything, you don't have an addiction"
I do find my role fulfilling but equally I don't see myself being able to do it years from now....
I never comment but I got to say I love the new brows on you it brings out your features beautiful💕
Yess we would love to hear the box cutter story!
I have experience of CPS having very dangerous bias. She had it in for me being disabled, unemployed & a single mother who used a sperm donor. She was so biased she would've been happy to put my child under a roof with my mother, who had let us be regularly beaten up by our drunk father. As well as my brother who SAd me as a child daily. And the CPS worker felt qualified to claim this fact was untrue. Without even speaking to me. Just because he agreed to take a lie detector test (which he didn't take). As reasonably intelligent people, we all know lie detectors can be passed. If you don't believe in them, then they don't work. She would've been happy taking my child and putting her under a roof with my mother + brother. And she demanded they both regularly saw my child, without me present. I'm not going to list all the horrific things the worker did because there was too much & you wouldn't believe me. But suffice to say she even managed to prevent herself being investigated. Ironically purely because I had won a previous complaint. She was allowed to claim a future win might hinder her 'work' AKA prevent her fabricating concern. I truly fear for any child/parent she had access to. She completely went against all my child's wishes. And although we won in court, the worker still tormented my child throughout her childhood. Even after a judge told her to stop and ordered CPS to leave us alone. Had she enacted her reign of terror on someone with fewer coping skills, they may not have survived. Be that the child or the parent. Sadly I know of at least one case at the time, where a disabled mother was bullied by CPS so badly that she didn't survive. Cases such as that tend to have gaging orders. So that will be just the tip of the iceberg.
I feel you pain. I have a physical disability and was a single parent. Social services tried to use that against me and wanted to place my children with an ex, who was not the father and WAS a registered sex offender!! They said “a bad dad is better than no dad”. They took a child with a chronic condition off their medication without ever talking to a doctor, withheld medical care when that same child ended up with a broken arm while in foster care (the details of that injury remain sketchy) and refused to take the child to the orthopaedic surgeon when they were told the arm must be seen within 24 hours. I had to take the child when I got them back two months later and the arm was permanently damaged. The list goes on and on. The only reason we survived the situation was because we got very lucky and had a good judge.
I would love to hear the door kicking story please!!
It sounds like you’ve had such an interesting life Mary. You seem like a really great person.
Going thru a lot rn! Thank you for posting, I love both channels ❤
Wow bless these people for doing this work.
I have so much respect for you Mary!!!! Love these videos!!! Also, your voice reminds me of Julia Roberts in Erin Brockovich.
My parents should not have EVER had children. Thank you for this video.
I just started as a cps worker 3 weeks ago and I’m looking for a new job already. This work is not for everyone. Everything you shared remains the same except the case loads are overwhelming. I just can’t.
My ex is a dfs lawyer, wouldn’t wish that job or a case worker job on anyone. The politics of it all and the push to reunite families at the detriment of the child was super frustrating to hear about.
Such an important job, there needs to be protection for the employees though!! You became an even better person for taking on such a role in the lives of others. Wow ❤
I studied criminology at university. When I was in high school everyone said you have to choose a major that you find very interesting otherwise you won’t graduate. Well my choice was criminology en I loved to learn about it. University was a good time but nobody said anything about the jobs after your degree…. I absolutely hate the jobs in my field like this job you’re talking about. I absolutely agree, everyone hates you all the time. Its so hard to be happy….
Bachelor’s is for interest, master’s is for jobs ❤
@@hotwasabi1085 I have my masters 🙂
I believe you may be one of the good ones. You say you are all trying to work yourselves out of a job. I get that concept. However I have heard that the agencies get more money/funding when they remove children from their homes, and raises are also affected by this. Is there any truth to that? Also, can you do a video about what our rights as parents are? As good parents, one of all of our fears is a bogus DCF complaint gone bad.
Watched your 400k bloopers reel, loved all your salty language!
I respect you so much, Mary!!
Once when I was a kid the doctors called CPS because in their eyes I “fell down the stairs and hurt my leg”…. Except I actually did 😅 I was cagey when the docs asked what happened because I was told not to jump down for a thrill and I did it anyway. I kept saying I fell to avoid getting in trouble haha CPS figured that out immediately of course, and even though it gave my ma a good scare we’re still really grateful they were there in case the quotes were necessary!
I was a Juvenile Probation Officer for 21 years. Worked very closely with CPS (DCF here) on many cases.
I have many examples who neighbors tried to accused parents for hurting their kids, only because they don't like them, which of course was all lies.Here in Greece is the same the half of these are lies, by people who hate their neighbors or relatives.😮With this story you reminded me those.I have an example with a close friend...is so frustrating..of course the haters call anonymously...
Hey Mary, you did tell that story with the box cutter before. I remember hearing it, just don't recall in which video 😂
I must say good for you because that does not seem like a easy job but i’m sure the children felt safe around you. You probably made a very big difference even if it was for a moment. 🙂
Some many families shouldn't be held together, this only deteriorates the children's state. the community system is just as neglectful, just for a slightly different target of people.
The fact that women are sent into super volatile homes and situations without any personal protection is insane. They should be able to carry mace at least. That’s a dangerous job! Things can happen very quickly too and the people can be on substances and very unpredictable.
They had more problems then anybody......from a male early orphan. Love your channel
Quiet in the summers. Imagine that. Guess that tells right there where most of the reports come from.
I want to hear about that story!!!!!
Your life honestly sounds a lot like mine Mary..crazy times.
I have a lot of friends who do this work. Traumatic.
mary you are such a badass
I had someone call cps on me because they didn’t like my bf …. When the cps worker calls she mentions something about my daughters birthday invitations lmao it basically narrowed down who called cause the party hadn’t happened yet and I only invited a handful of ppl ……still waiting for there karma …. And they closed the cps case cause there was nothing lol
My mother did the same thing when I moved out and got married because she was jealous. She wouldn’t disclose where she was taking my son and would never bring him back home on time so when I stopped letting her pick him up she called them on me. Needless to say I WILL NEVER have a relationship with her again.
😊💝💝
Ex fiancés wife????? Pray tell!
Talking to the child at school without the parents consent or knowledge is the so unbelievably shady.
Hey Mary, I am pregnant so I am interested in pregnancy stories and birth stories. Would you mind talking about your experience? Thanks!
Mary please, we want to hear that story 🫶🏽5:25
Oooh I also wanna add a tid bit that in a lot of places, a CPS caseworker isn’t necessarily a Social Worker.
Here in TX, any degree can get you a job with CPS.
A social worker requires a BSW/MSW and licensure 🤍