THIS. This is something I regret not telling my therapist. It's not fair that children have to receive therapy in order to manage their inner struggles instead of actually treating the root of the problem which comes from the parents.
@@BuJammy Wow.. You're in a good spot, you made it. Myself I'm 22 just starting to become my own person, similar family situation. I wish you happiness and luck, random jammy!
A lot of people would imagine the father to be this intimidating, violent and aggressive monster. Always belittling and guilt tripping his son, blaming him for his problems... truth is toxic manipulation is a lot more subtle.
That is also what most people believe to be the general definition of an abusive parent, and that only physical abuse counts as "real" abuse. Anything less than that is not as severe. It's true physical is the worst form, but that doesn't take away from the longlasting impacts of emotional and mental abuse on children. Just because you can't see bruises or scars doesn't mean they aren't any.
it's not even really manipulation i am sure the father loves his son he is just an alcoholic, and They have a compulsion they can't help it there fucked in the head. This shit hit me hard having dealt with mentally ill and substance abusers before in my life and family. You want them to get better so much, but some people can't be helped they just spiral and spiral until they destroy you with them. Finally your only left with the good times and the memories you would rather not remember. I choose to focus on the good ones though that's all you can do in life really keep moving forward, and try to remember the good times. you think the people you love are going to last forever, and if your lucky you die first.
Lets be honest, no one answers this question honesty, let’s be real, you probably unconsciously said I’m fine or words to that effect because unless your actually honest or comfortable with reply with the truth, would the person you are talking to be mentally prepared for the implications of their “consideration of your well being”
I think too often are these relationships depicted as “drunk man angry, drunk man bad, bad father” but this just felt more real and more tragic. I love it, and I hate it
I can feel this because I have it in my real life. sometimes I feel sad about seeing my grandfather drinking again. he's just like father in this video... but sometimes he's saying words that hurt me deeply. and I'm thinking again about is it just regular words and he will forget it soon or it's that type of words which drunk people say, because they think about it alot, but when they sober they'll never say it... 'cause their tongue's tied.
I mean my dad was in my life but I left pretty early on & haven't talked to him in like 2 decades, pretty much. & he hasn't bothered to reach out to me. In a way my father in law brings out things, & triggers things. Only the father in law is way worse. He's a pos I'm not all that familiar w/ & I pretty much hate him. It's like have u entertained your own kids values at all? Other than to prey on how u warped their self worth.. so they can feel dependent enough for validation... not that they shouldn't have grown up themselves. But wow dude, Still Not trying. But have u even just bought them materials? Bc somexs just buying stuff is way easier. But nope. Nothing. More like stealing, expecting the kids to be that daddy type (fixing his car, paying for everything. Right down to expecting ins. $), treating them more like friends to party w/, talking sh about the mom bc thats all he can do, less action, more words that don't even bother w/ a solution. & its like let's pass his values onto the next. & then onto the next. I know parents have such a huge part in their kids development. But somexs ppl even manage to skip out on that part. Bc being irresponsible, being spiteful, seeking attention in all the wrong ways, not taking accountability, & busy playing the blame game, talking even more ish just to, while thinking the world owes bc you're oh so sad, is def the bigger pic. The main pt. No, go back to ur self indulging sh, b4 u mosey ur way on over here. He's legitimately outside now talking to these neighbors prob half his age playing w/ remote vehicles. Prob low key concerned about all the drama we cause... leaving out parts, trying to paint some pic about how he's the sh. & poor him type vibes. Bc he's everything.. What adult is that invested in ppl like that? When he really just acts like he's jealous of everyone!!! if there wasn't enough going on in their lives/ heads... first off u damn old geezer you're washed up & uncool. They don't even wanna f w/ u like that. Theyre just most likely trying to be polite bc you're an idk- ELDER. Social cues much? How embarassing. They prob don't even want to f w/ him even for good xs. & predictably he's always got all these questionable imaginary "bitches" ( that wouldn't even bother w/ him either) that r half his age. Somexs they're my age & he has to let it be known. 1 of the many many many many reasons I can't stand the dude! He's disgusting! The lowest of the lowest wouldn't even want that. 1) u don't have sh. Not even a car. 2) u don't save = u have no $. 3) u room mate it up w/ ur own son. Lol, when could he possibly even have the chance to get it on. Bc shouldn't u have been building yourself since waaaaay back?! Ironic how his crutch is bc mommy died. Mommy who gave him everything. Which every chance he gets, "you would've loved her. She would've bought u anything u wanted..." gah damn this dude. I've never seen such huge of a mooch. Ever. Scrawny mia grill lookin crackhead. It's funny to me how he thinks I'm missing out on so much if he bails. Kind of a little sad for my hubby on how he desperately yearns for him. No matter what. But it's also a reason on y he's such a lil b about sh. Makes me actually admire how much my dad's been through & all the actual typical male behavior he displays. Building foundations from the ground up. Literally too. And I dont even like the dude.
4:05 this scene is personally for me very heartbreaking it reminds me of my childhood while i was sleeping i was always woken up by the light of the living room and every time i went check what’s going on it was my mother drinking alone this scene just reminds me of her
My dad is an abusive alcoholic and my mom left us. For a year, she hasn't even tried contacting me nor my little brother, she instead lived secretly with her boyfriend. I remember couple of nights, sitting with my drunk father in the living room and him telling me with shaking voice, that we have to stick together, because we are all he has. This animation just brought all of that back to me after a year of running away from him. Sometimes it's nice to remember the pain, if pain is all that is left. Greetings from Slovakia Edit: omg thank u so much for ur likes and very kind comments! Things r getting better now since I'm going to be taken away by orphanage in 2-3 weeks and to be honest, I'm kind of excited! Again, thank u all for being so nice ❤️
yea use to see my dad get drunk and my mom and dad getting into huge yelling arguments dishes plates were a common thing to find in the trash at my house hold
they always say that you can tell them anything, but it never actually feels like you can. you see how they treat people when they share their problems with them, and you feel like you either have to bottle it up only to explode later or you have to suck it up and tell him only to get shut down. this video hits way too close to home.
I've had my dad living with me for about a year. Then he left, going from place to place, continuing his path of self-destruction. I haven't spoken to him for years. This one hit home. Especially the "we're in this together" thing I remember. But in the end, it was all about him.
Cant assume anything but im going through some similar stuff. Become Unconquerable from your videos helped me get a brighter vision. I truly hope this situation can get better
My parents got divorced when I was 6, mother left my dad for another man. I spent one half of the week with mom, and the other with my dad, gradually shifting towards him - it was more comfortable for me for some reason, I felt more connected with him. Now I’m 21, living with my girlfriend in, like, 15 minutes from my dad, seeing him every couple of weeks. I’m very proud of him - despite being left like that, he seems to have forgiven my mom, as they talk like old friends when they meet. He has a nice job, goes to the gym and looks like 40-45, being actually 57. That’s probably one of the best possible role models a boy can have. Love you, dad
You unlocked the 'good ending'... In my case my father became a super abusive violent drunkard when my mom left him, I'm still have a lot of scars physically,mentally and emotional ones... Still, I forgive him for all he has done when he was dying, was the only one that not left him.
Narcissism is a large part of the boomer generation.. me me me , A guy online once told me he was talking to his dad on the phone about not having enough money for his kids dentist appointments . His dad just changed the subject and got bored and started talking about himself.... Then about a few days later his dad calls him all excited on how he bought this old BMW motorcycle and laughed about how he didn't even want it but couldn't resist spending the money...
Damn the excuses, the bad habits, the unwillingness to change,the false promises to change, the pretending to know what you’re talking about, the mother leaving and the dad not taking responsibility for it. This is all too accurate for me and my relationship with my father. Especially the guilt tripping him into staying with him, then, to what I will assume to happen next, him staying in his ways because he knows he’s gotten away with it all over again..
I dont know how that feels but soon ı will become an actual adult and that is one of the worst things ı can imagine because ı cant even talk with my family. Sorry for you loss even if ı dont understand you be strong man you can be a mountain if you want.
@@howlingwolf9906 ik even I can't look anyone in the eye even my family but I am trying to improve myself in school and and least straightening my posture so that I can be as confident as I was before
My dad is one of those mostly emotionless, narcissistic assholes with the occasional moments of empathy and kindness. His soul is shattered and he suffers, and because of it so does everyone around him. I moved out years ago but I still feel that conflict of wanting to be close and wanting to never see him again.
Żabka to zawsze jest miejsce w którym może spotkać cię wszystko.ogółem myślę że wszyscy pracownicy tej oto żaby mieli jakieś /wciąż mają pogmatwane dzieciństwo. Za tymi smutnymi oczami pewnie znajduje się tyle interesujących historii.
My dad was toxic as hell, I enlisted in the military because nothing I did made him proud of me and it wasn't enough. I decided to cut him out of my life and I became better and broke the cycle with my kids.
Do you plan to forgive your father? I think it will free you from a lot of burden but i still haven't done it myself. When i want to, my mind screams not to do it with heavy emotions and invents excuses, its hard.
@@hisheeelijah1482 I understand. Last year i forgave my mum. It was realy hard, as you said my mind tormented me but the moment i got the 3 words out, it went away and all resentment was gone. If only i could say the same to my father. I think my fears and anger would finaly go away.
It’s probably a combination of guilt at seeing others as robots (even if somewhat justified) and the discomfort that you will probably be seen that way by others
the fact that they are just in the background, epole you might never know and simply exist, die and you would be none the wiser , they lives have no meaning to us and minenial thinker intentionally or not, depicts them with these faces as these npc's to potentially highlight that
Once, I was sat in my room and the temperature was around 30°C (86°F) wearing a shirt and long trousers. My dad thought it was a good idea to force me to wear shorts because he thought I was hot and suffering in silence. Apparently I was such a piece of shit I'm incapable of dressing myself. Ended up with his saliva all over my face and enough insults to last an eon. I take showers at 60°C to 65°C (140°F to 150°F) and I love it. Once got in a car at 50°C (122°F) and it didn't bother me. He wanted that much control over me. And yes, I got beat since I was 2 or 3, he switched to mental torture at about 16 and asked me to jump off a bridge NOT JOKINGLY many times. Too bad I got into a top 10 global uni for physics and my dreams will keep going, I'm currently in my 20's. IT'S NEVER TOO LATE. Imagine a family where the kid always tries to escape torture, and another where the kid feels like one with their family (positive reinforcement), this is how criminals are born.
Just like me, i never met my father until i Was 7, i hate him since that moment, imagine, you dont know this person but he start to cry to you when you dont act like he want, all my life he compare me to my cousins, "they eat faster than you, you always lose, you arent like me, when i had your age.... and he start to says a lot of bullshit. Yes, is stupid this comparation, but this happens, and a lot of stupid shit like this, how can yo have confidence if your own father talk to you like that...? Now, when he start to talk like he know everything about me, i remember him this kind of things he do, and he only say: thats was in the past, you need to grow up..... (i still learning english)
@@Delverk You have a great English Delverk. I'm sorry fr what you've been through with your dad. Time will pass and you will be a free man - from his shadow and from hate. It's time to let yourself feel it because it will pull you further in life, motivate your to be better. It looks like time passes slow but its actually quite fast - and feelings we thought were forever are gone someday. You'll be a great man, have a great wife and family, and love will fullfill you in a way that the past will be gone, although you will carry the lessons you learned with you. Wish the best to you and all the people reading who went through the same.
OR bouns combo of engulfing toxic mother + emotionally absent neglectful bitter father. Can my ex ever snap out of that abuse-induced nightmare that condemns his life?
@@Endomatic0 yesh. But now you recognise that, it’s time to get out and give it a go. I was constantly ridiculed for trying to do my own thing, by both so called friends and family, I succeeded for a while, then I failed, but I kept going. Got back up and, learning from my mistakes, went at it again..... I’m older now, and recently lost both parents. I had to set a boundary and we didn’t speak for many years. It reset the relationship. The last decade they both apologised to me for things that happened. We finished well I’ve learnt to stay focused on the outcome, ignore attacks and abuse, and importantly keep my head and my manner calm in emotionally charged situation, knowing that they can’t say anything that will change the way I feel. This grounded strength that comes from being true to myself and not giving a rat’s what others think. This approach has worked for me in so many situations. The _No_ with a smile is such a powerful tool. Setting the standard for behaviour in a dignified and calm manner while the other person is losing it, has such an impact long term, and gained me a lot more respect from others who have witnessed such confrontations, and belated apologies for behaviour of those whom the confrontation was with. Maybe it’s just my age. Maybe it’s because I don’t care what people think. Maybe it’s because I am honest with myself, and seek to make good on any mistakes I have made, and that those mistakes were not intentional.
This makes me appreciate my dad even more. He is a hard working man who always helped me when I needed him. I share great memories and moments with this man. As a child I saw him like a hero who could fix anything in and around the house. He drove more than a dozent times with us to austria, italy, france, poland etc. for vacation and drove this 3,5t camper over those narrow pass roads in the alps. Today my dad is 60 and iam 23, I live 60km away from home and study industrial engineering. I visit my parents every week. 2020 we still drove together to austria, but this time I drove the camper. love you dad, I got a good one.
Different circumstances but. For a while, my adoptive mother was very abusive to me, and I had a friend who dropped out of HS at 15 and was miserable working as a cashier to support herself, so I was too afraid to follow. When I turned 17, we found out that her arm problems were caused by a disc pushing in on her spine. In almost 2 years, she lost most of the feeling in the right half of her body. I had to help her change, had to help her walk, had to wipe her ass, all the while she continued to hit and berate me. Still I didnt leave. I lived like that, with her, in our grime and filth, until she finally had a heart attack a few years ago and like magic I was free. It feels so much better. But... I'm angry I didn't leave sooner, I'm so far behind everyone else now and I still feel like I'm 14. They're getting done with their Masters and I'm just... here, trying to pick up my pieces. But I know I'd have felt shame and guilt if I'd just left. She was my mom, and my sister took off as soon as she was legally able to, what was I supposed to do? Let her die in her own filth? I... I dunno. It's. Hard.
@@MontChevalier i was bullied alot when i was a child. I thought i had it worst. I then learnt that most bullies are sad individuals that has survived and endured 5 times the amount of bad things i went through. How can i not feel sorry for you? Mayby if i was a phsycopath or a sociopath but i'm not.
At least he is trying to be just emotionnaly usefull, my father litteraly left my familly 2 years ago for another wife. I'm the oldest and still a teen, i must carry on to help my mother the most as i can. He isn't giving us any news exept that she already made a "new sister". Also i almost forget : he came in house to rob things and cut water and electricity, still seaching for the point of doing that
Their entire relationship is very coodependent, but ironically, the father is emotionally absent. The other parent is either emotionally absent or is physically absent, so the parent puts the role of a partner or companion to the child instead of having parent-child boundaries with it. The father here knows he would be nothing without his son and would end up alone, but he takes advantage of the fact that it's his son and guilt trips him if he leaves, knowing as he is his son, he is the only one that would tolerate him. But since he sees what his father is, he plans on leaving, so he makes his son feel unworthy if he leaves, because he knows that if his son leaves, all of the son's problems would go away.
if that were my father, i would drop his ass, leave him on his own. I would not let him ruin my future and not feel guilt or responsibility since hes a grown-ass man who decided to give birth to me and now not get his act together. Either he moves on and changes to be independant again or he can die in his apartment of alcohol poisoning for all i care. This is my future and my life and i let nobody ruin it, not even my own blood
This really hit me in the feels. Good job. Reminds me of a story I once read about a father and his adult son. The father was always drinking and was heavily flawed, but he loved his son very much. What caused their relationship to be toxic was because the son was always taking care of him, as if he was the child and not the parent. When the father killed himself and the son found his body, the son's first instinct was to 'put him back together and fix him' because that's what he's always done.
@@maximilianoferrer6841 yeah, it should be the bare minimum, yet still considered as lucky. Having a supportive and caring family who doesn't emotionally, mentally(oh phisically) @bu$e you and mainpulate you and not support you or even care. Hating your family is considered bad, but having a good one is "rare/lucky". What has this society become?
Imagine to have a father like mine who is not a alcohol dependent, he's alive, he works, but he's basically absent. The day my parents divorced, time ago , my father died with their marriage.
Forsaking marriage is a path that you can’t go back on, it’s actually such a vile thing especially with kids. It’s like their lack of faith in marriage ties to their lack of faith in God.
same here, no alcohol, no drugs, but after mom left he just goes to bed or yells, the only time he talks to me now is to lecture me or cry to me. i feel bad for wanting to move far away but it’s hard to handle being an emotional crutch to someone you don’t even know anymore.
The same for me, I have a Father with an Important job so I never see him, It’s like If he left us, since he left our Familiars like Grandpas, Uncles and that threat us differently. They hide things from us, never Invite us to important things like they used to. Because we don’t have who they cared for. And I can’t see my Mother’s familiars. I feel so alone sometimes, but anyways, It will get better, I hope
when his father said "I only have you son" it just reminded me of my mom cause she really doesn't have anybody else and I just feel like if I'm not there for her something'll happen to her and I hate feeling like I'm responsible for her and then I just feel bad because we're not really that close and I blame myself for it because I never really made that much of an effort and by this point I just try not to see her that often hoping that maybe she'll try to focus on something different and better for her then then me..-
Yeah is not funny making jokes about not having a father I have no father and it’s not funny but I really don’t care to be honest it doesn’t hurt me seeing jokes like this
My father is nothing like this guy here, but they are similar in their way of not accepting responsibility for their actions. UPDATE: To all of you asking how I posted this comment before the video is up, I am one of Millenia’s patrons. You can find my name at the end of the video, Frank T. Wang.
I am blessed to have a father that stopped drinking for 14 years just after I was born. He is a decent man and I completely respect him and do not take his presence for granted.
i was in a similar position, just much worse with lots of abuse and no socialisation, i think my parents planned to get a house and to live there together, but personally i wanted to move away from all the abuse a long time ago, but they would not allow me to get a job, or to become independent, they wanted me to focus on my education, anything else was irrelevant they didnt want me to leave but wanted me to pay money once i got my job and then one day it just got too bad and when they were sleeping i simply left in the middle of the night to never return at that time luckily i already had a job and was secretly renting a flat, because i knew the day would come when it will become unbearable to live with them i know its a sad story and i wish it wouldnt havr to come this far, but i couldnt let them have control over me for the rest of my life and dictating me what to do, while also abusing and neglecting me it was a decision i had to make for my own sanity
i am so sorry to hear that man are you okay now? was that recent or years in the past? how is your relationship with your parents now? sorry for spamming, im just very interested in your story
I'm sorry to hear that and good on you for doing that. It's not easy. It's funny how family can be either a fantastic thing or a horrible thing. I didn't have it as bad as you, but I am so different from my parents in everything i do and opinions I have that I simply couldn't handle it anymore. They have always been supportive but somehow I feel like they are complete strangers to me and that there is no connection between us. I finally moved out and I can finally be myself. As long as you live at your parents you are under their control. It works if you have a great connection with your family, but for people like you and me it's never going to work in our favor and it's gonna feel like a prison.
This is so true. It's like nobody wants to admit that good/bad parenting can actually have an effect on a child's life. Nothing that happens is anybody's fault these days.
@Goosa Poosa im sorry that you have to go through that,you are strong to be honest. Though you still have your freinds,and your other family member,and even i here and problably more people who is on your side and will always be. im proud of you,and other people are problably are too!
This... hits close to home. I dont blame nobody except me for my mistakes, but i lose a lot of time and mental health trying to "help" my father in his problems, severe of then wanted by himself, and when i get bored of all this shit and tell him thats these arent my problems, he get mad and says "okay go, do whatever you want" and start to says that he have health problems, is not young, its alone, etc etc... Its not a bad father, he aslo helps and suppport me in severe things, but sure is toxic and manipulative sometimes
Yeah same here, i know for sure i am not touching alcohol... This shit wrecked my man. I miss when i was just an innocent kid, where it was mild, when he used to care about me and i viewed him as hero. Now hes just nothing more than a dude i see sometimes biking to the store for backback full of beer with puffy, scratched face.
Sometimes the only lesson is 'what not to do' but if we can break the cycle with our kids we have done enough. Be warned: make effort to heal before you get married even if you need therapy or to be single for a while, you might not be the abuser you grew up with, but a lot of times abuse victims seek out partners that mirror their parents that are abusers, you will Not see it coming.. unless you have fully healed. No one deserves round 2 of abuse as an adult..take care of yourselves
@@LDuke-pc7kq 'victims seek out partners that mirror their parents' this is more often than not a typical case of taking what you can get. men with psychological scars are seldom lady slayers, they are not drowning in prime poon as their anxieties and wants cripple their interaction with the rival sex. this in turn prevents them from having their pick of undamaged young minxes who would make fine companion for them. so they are often caught between a rock and a hard place, either enduring an unwanted dry spell or settling for subpar notch. the outcome in either case is painfully predictable.
As a recent highschool graduate that was being “raised” in a family with an alcoholic step-dad, this is heavily relatable due to the amount of trauma I have dealt with during the past 5 years.
At least he is your stepdad, you are not emotionally connected to him like someone is to his real father, and imagine that real father is also very abusive and he is beating you, so the mixture of love for your father and fearing him everyday thinking is it now when he will beat me again, and living like that for almost 20 years make such an impact on your subconcious. The worst thing is he is not even alcoholic or anything that would cloud his mind, so you're asking yourself, does he hate you or is it something else...
When I saw this video a few weeks ago I cried tears of joy. I wasn't really aware of how much luck I do have, having a father such as mine. I'm really grateful for him, he's always listening when I tell him something, he's giving me tips about many life situations, we can joke about everything and he's overall a great husband to my mother and a caring father to my sister and I. When I'm an adult I want to be like him. I wish him the best and hope he's living a long fullfilled life with us, so we can spend many time with him. I'm sorry for everyone who doesn't had the chance to live with such a person or doesn't have a father at all. To those people I want to say that you guys can make it, don't give up and keep pushing yourself forward, you guys will find a person like this in the future and when you'll meet him/her you can always be proud of yourself that you didn't gave up. You made it and you'll now life the best life you've ever had. Thank you to everyone who read this far. I hope you will achieve everything you want and meet the person you always wanted to have by your side. Have a good day/night. Thank you God for everything
Everyday I think about my father. He has always been abscent in my life, not physically, I live with him. I have never feel love from him, when I try to talk with him about something important he ignores me and laughs, even when i think he loves me a little, I realize that's not true. The only things he do "for me" are actually because of my mom, like, he would do it so my mom doesn't have to, which is okay, but the point is that it's never about me, he doesn't think about me, about how I feel, he always thinks I'm wrong, if I try to tell him that he is wrong and he's hurting me he just tells me to shut up and say that I'm an stupid and bad-mannered piece of shit. I still remember that night my parents where arguing, they were in the kitchen, i entered to take something for dinner but then he told me to stay there. He said to stop only trusting my mom, to stop talking only with her, that since then I had to tell all to him and not my mom, that it was my obligation, without caring about my feelings and that my mom is the only person I trust. Since I didn't do that, he has never tried to be a good father. He always justifies himself by saying that I don't trust him because of my mom, he says my mom has never let him educate me, and that's not true, he has never cared about me, and my mom has to do everything he never does for me. I hate him, I can't even feel compassion for him, I can't lie and tell I don't want him to die, because yes, I want him to, I want him to disappear from this world, or if that's not possible, I want to see him suffer for all what he have done to my mom and me. I don't need him. He's not my family, and I will never forgive him.
Seriously. I would have rather had this father than the one I got. At least this father, despite his many faults and dysfunctionality, loves his son and genuinely wants to spend time with him and would never leave him. Call me old fashioned, but empathizing with his trauma, I wouldn't leave him because he never left me. I guess that comes with being smarter and stronger (not heartless). To me, this father is internally a hurt child. The least I could do is care for him the same way he cared for me through his hurt and depression while he worked to support me when his wife left. Maybe it's my flaw, but I have enough of heart to empathize with his loss. ... Besides, it's not like he beat wojak in drunken anger for having a differing opinion or disagreeing. To me, this father only wants someone to listen. This father could've left with other deadbeats like him on their path to self destruction like him, leaving Wojack completely alone or worse. I understand why he held onto his son. You see... His son is all that is left of his ex wife and the memories they shared. Again... It's a shame. I'm not saying this ok. What I'm saying is that it's a damned shame our fathers make this one seem like a saint.
@@OtherDalfite I tried in the past lol, turns out I was lucky enough to not give children,saved me lots of troubles, just try to live by example, teach your children the issues of being a grown up, to learn discipline and to stick to long term plans, that might be enough for him to make you proud one day, good luck friend.
This hit me in my feels. My dad didn’t engage in the verbal guilt trips like this guy, but I was definitely beholden to support him in my teenage years. He was super dependent and our situation could have ended up like Wojak and dad here, but mine passed away when I was 18 after I just started college. I was afraid to think about leaving my dad, but every so often I thought about how one day I’d have to.
I mostly took my father for granted growing up. It's only now as a college student that I'm starting to appreciate the struggles he went through to raise me. I honestly feel ashamed that I took a good man for granted when I could have very well ended up like the guy in this video
If your dad is still alive no time like the present to reconnect with him. My oldest younger sister is permanently kicking herself since she spent most of her life having as little as possible to do with our mom and being lousy to her any time mom reached out to her since Ma died suddenly a few days shy of her 59th birthday and my sister will never have the chance to make amends as Ma is no more.
@DonDoesProgramming it can be a wild card. I got way further than my dad at life using what he did in given situations as an example of what NOT to do. He's a good man and he did all he could, but he just gave up too easily with things. One thing is that my dad had many years of education, but no degree since he bombed his final exams. Without a degree he could only work regular jobs despite having an advanced education. That alone would eat me up inside, so I vowed whatever I majored in I would complete if not just to live better than I did as a boy.
@@FrangoTraidor nooo cuz that would just be a typical son mad at the stepdad for obvious reasons.... we wanna see real toxic sons reasons for being toxic to the father
Even though I don't have any toxic parents at all, the ending of the video made me really sad and heartbroken when he asks for him not to leave. It just hits really hard when you think about it.
Its weird actually, to think in retrospective how prvileged with childhood was with a normal, non absent father that actually cared for his family. I actually believed this was the norm until I became an adult and figured out it was more of the exception.
Same, my dad is amazing and very loving! I always knew that I was lucky to have him because spending time at friend's houses I realized a lot of dads are toxic to their families sadly.
My dad is VERY SIMILAR to this one. My father met my mom around high-school and had me around 25-26. God bless my mother's soul for all she's done for us. But my father? He can go to hell. Went to jail twice, currently lives with his girlfriend, and he's a narcissistic sociopath. He manipulated me twice (He made it sound like he apologized.) and yelled at me. When I turned sixteen, I no longer wanted him in my life and haven't heard from him since. Men, go after your own definition of manhood and learn from your mistakes. Being a man isn't equivalent to getting lots of women, sleeping around and having kids with them.
Shiet. My dad is the best man I've ever met, and if I die being half a man he was, I'll think of myself as a sucessful man. However, I wish to see your take on toxic mothers
I'm pretty sure my mother, not to mention my late grandmother (HER mother) broke my father, to finish off the crap that my paternal great-grandmother started.
I was lucky. Both my parents were great. My mom was a super hard worker, and my dad never drank in his life. But they weren't afraid to do what they had to do when I stepped out of line.
@@justawlwwholikesshygirls5704 Is it possible many people have great parents and just don't realize it? A lot of kids demonize their parents just because their parents set limitations on what bad behaviors they are allowed to do. Parents have to do that.
@@theboombody it's not always about strictness. Its about things like neglect, shaming, pressuring etc. There are nasty things one can do, even to their children. Strict parents aren't toxic at all, they just raise their children differently. Just because few spoilt children demonize their parents, doesn't mean it's common. Infact, shitty parents are alot more common than you think. Possibly because people have kids when they really shouldn't.
One of the things I've been learning is that for you to get a better life, you have to leave behind those who drag you down - mainly if they're your parents / parental figures. Not saying you have to hate them or them hate you. Not saying you have to never talk again. Saying just that you have to lead your own life and decisions, not needing their approval or support. You have to be your own person.
wow man this is a great consequences it literally tell me how was life and how much do u really need to sacrifices for school this is a great it inspire me :)
My parents literally had this exact attitude and drove me into a depression. Toughest 5 years of my life. Now i ignore all of the pessimistic crap they say. I take risks, belive in myself and now I'm actually making some headway in world.
My grandfather was like this, drank so much his whole adult life even grandma wouldn't live with him anymore. I met him a few times in an assisted living facility, not for his being old but from drinking his mind down to mush, he already drank himself into the place around age 60. Couldn't even really understand him as his words were all slurred and his movements were all twitchy and uncoordinated. Even as a little boy of 5 it was blatant evidence too much drinking WILL fuck you up, as other times Dad and I would visit his dad who was about the same age as that grandpa still working at the fire station like an old gigachad by contrast sharp as a tack full of pith and vinegar. It showed me to leave drinking alone lest I wound up like my mom's dad.
Sorry to hear that boys....everyone has their battles, and everyone fights it differently. However Alcohol is pretty much poison, drink responsibly and never rely on Alcohol or any form of stimulant to give you long term pleasure, because it won't. Don't scarifies your body and mind for short term pleasure, find another way.
Yeah it sucked. My dad stopped drinking alcohol and he is a MUCH better person now. Goes for runs regularly, juggles work well, raises us well, has a great sense of humour and is a great dude all around. 10/10 love him so much
I am 30 years old, since 12 years ago I didn't have relationship with my father. I think is better this way, was painful to understand but now I know that decision was extremely wise.
@@PatrickMenesesYTOfficial4945 that's usually a good advice for a 18-20 years old guy. I am 30 he was abusive and didn't give a rat shit what happens to me. For him I was just a pair of hands able to work "wasting" time in the university.
My step dad walked out on us in the middle of the night a few months ago and stole $5,000 from me on the way out. After he got all of my money stolen 3 days after he left he calls regularly to beg for help.
@@sanmartinovallevictorjuven5187 ok anonymous armchair advice giver who is definitely an expert in family relationships and an authorized intellectual that you should trust for family advices instead of mr fake depressed discord user who would potentially make your life miserable and regretful
@@LordOfChaos.x refer to the message on top of this. You have no rights to tell a person to do anything if you dont have the experience or knowledge They can choose their own path. And thus this guy may just be like any other youtube user and is faking family issues for fame so your 'advices', although bad, will still be put in waste
@@Archonsx Do you know why some toxic relationship exists ? Because sometimes whe don't know we are in one or that we are the cause of it. Maybe it's the son's choice of staying even though he is well aware of the situation. Then yeah that's life, sometimes we don't understand why people do that. You are allowed to be depressed and lonely but if you don't do anything to change your situation than you're just a big fucking loser and a waste of everyone's time and resources. They will breed, multiply and become a pandemic and one day the whole world will be trapped in their toxic relationship. And on that day we have the choice to say that's life or that we get up of our fat asses and make a change.
i have an alcoholic mom and i relate to this so much. its much worse than them just leaving forever. they are a burden and hold you back. its really hard to explain, because on the outside they are a functioning human. at least in my case.
My parents are in a purely legal relationship, never had a big wedding (just went down to the courthouse in suits and signed a paper), Don't sleep in the same bed and rarely show any amount of affection to each other. The only time I see them emotionally together is competing for my affection which isn't that reassuring. I always suspect they're cheating on each other or have some kind of unspoken agreement but I have no idea how you could live your life like than and then have a kid.
@@TwoDollarGararge I don't know how the relates to the comment but fax. People think kids will fill you with joy, they do but you have to sacrifice so much for kids. If you're not willing to sacrifice then don't have children.
The relationship of ur parents is the same as me and my husband's marriage. We also only have civil wedding. We both arent inlove but we do care for each other. He was an international student here in canada when i met him and got married because he needed someone to sponsor him while i needed a place to stay. We have been married for 6 yrs but act more like best friends lol
im so lucky to have my dad. although sometimes his arguments might not be reasonable, hes still a hard-worker. he handles my moms toxic traits, his offices drama and etc. i'll always have respect for him.
Same can relate, i have mad respect for my dad and care for him, he works hard, helps other people, puts up with my moms bs, and trys his best to care for me. My mother i have a hard time seeing eye to eye with, and she's on that fine line of having anger issues, but my dad's a good man
If I had stayed with my father instead of my mother when they both broke up my life could be very related to this, it gives me goosebumps in all my body. You know your way, you just need to be aware that you know it.
My step father had a rough childhood me and my sis, saw him all the time drunk and mentally abusing us because we said him that he drank a little to much, my lil bro is being abused and tormented by this child like father who just gives him casually a ps4 pro at 4 years old, and feeding him the most unhealty shit in the world, the funny thing is that he even argues with him when he drinks, like a fucking 8 yo child, and then gives him what he wants, to this day i dont know why my mother had chosen this man for being a father or a husband for that matter
This video made me remind of my father so much, not because he was a bad father, but because he was great and I didn’t appreciate him when I was younger. Now that I’m 29 I understand perfectly all the things he did for me. Thanks dad, wherever you are.
Why are people like that?
Idk man
Idk man
Idk
we'll never know
Faliure
"Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow" - Homer Simpson
For a dumb sitcom father, he says such wise words.
Does he say that before or after strangling his son?
@@UniverseShinobi Yes.
Women shave
Everyone gansta until your dad says “I’m going out to get some shaving cream”
You can treat some children's mental illness just by treating their parent's.
MY GOD! This is relatable!!
Real af. We have to break this cycle
THIS.
This is something I regret not telling my therapist.
It's not fair that children have to receive therapy in order to manage their inner struggles instead of actually treating the root of the problem which comes from the parents.
That doesn't make any sense and you do not know what you are talking about.
@@BuJammy Wow.. You're in a good spot, you made it. Myself I'm 22 just starting to become my own person, similar family situation. I wish you happiness and luck, random jammy!
A lot of people would imagine the father to be this intimidating, violent and aggressive monster. Always belittling and guilt tripping his son, blaming him for his problems... truth is toxic manipulation is a lot more subtle.
That is also what most people believe to be the general definition of an abusive parent, and that only physical abuse counts as "real" abuse. Anything less than that is not as severe. It's true physical is the worst form, but that doesn't take away from the longlasting impacts of emotional and mental abuse on children. Just because you can't see bruises or scars doesn't mean they aren't any.
Not just to soN.
Toxic doesn't necessarily mean abusive.
it's not even really manipulation i am sure the father loves his son he is just an alcoholic, and They have a compulsion they can't help it there fucked in the head. This shit hit me hard having dealt with mentally ill and substance abusers before in my life and family. You want them to get better so much, but some people can't be helped they just spiral and spiral until they destroy you with them.
Finally your only left with the good times and the memories you would rather not remember. I choose to focus on the good ones though that's all you can do in life really keep moving forward, and try to remember the good times. you think the people you love are going to last forever, and if your lucky you die first.
_"Alcoholism is the greediest b!tch you're ever going to meet"_
Take it from a former drunkard, ameegos.
ok amigo
Wym by greedy? Doesn’t sound like you meant money
@@reedy_9619alcoholism holds a tight grip on someone and it wants you to
Imagine that you meet an old friend after many years and when asked "how are you" Your answer would be [blank].
pain
true
Fine so far
Off the deep end
Lets be honest, no one answers this question honesty, let’s be real, you probably unconsciously said I’m fine or words to that effect because unless your actually honest or comfortable with reply with the truth, would the person you are talking to be mentally prepared for the implications of their “consideration of your well being”
I think too often are these relationships depicted as “drunk man angry, drunk man bad, bad father” but this just felt more real and more tragic. I love it, and I hate it
I can feel this because I have it in my real life. sometimes I feel sad about seeing my grandfather drinking again. he's just like father in this video... but sometimes he's saying words that hurt me deeply. and I'm thinking again about is it just regular words and he will forget it soon or it's that type of words which drunk people say, because they think about it alot, but when they sober they'll never say it... 'cause their tongue's tied.
"i only have you son. Only you.. Please dont leave me , not now. Not like that"
shit hits home.
well that's reality for you
@@user-qn1wo1yg4sIt really does, man.
@Literally not ur mom W8 til you have to deal with a toxic lottery ticket buyer parent
It’s an awful feeling when your father is present in your life, but he distances himself from you emotionally
I mean my dad was in my life but I left pretty early on & haven't talked to him in like 2 decades, pretty much. & he hasn't bothered to reach out to me. In a way my father in law brings out things, & triggers things. Only the father in law is way worse. He's a pos I'm not all that familiar w/ & I pretty much hate him. It's like have u entertained your own kids values at all? Other than to prey on how u warped their self worth.. so they can feel dependent enough for validation... not that they shouldn't have grown up themselves. But wow dude, Still Not trying. But have u even just bought them materials? Bc somexs just buying stuff is way easier. But nope. Nothing. More like stealing, expecting the kids to be that daddy type (fixing his car, paying for everything. Right down to expecting ins. $), treating them more like friends to party w/, talking sh about the mom bc thats all he can do, less action, more words that don't even bother w/ a solution. & its like let's pass his values onto the next. & then onto the next. I know parents have such a huge part in their kids development. But somexs ppl even manage to skip out on that part. Bc being irresponsible, being spiteful, seeking attention in all the wrong ways, not taking accountability, & busy playing the blame game, talking even more ish just to, while thinking the world owes bc you're oh so sad, is def the bigger pic. The main pt. No, go back to ur self indulging sh, b4 u mosey ur way on over here. He's legitimately outside now talking to these neighbors prob half his age playing w/ remote vehicles. Prob low key concerned about all the drama we cause... leaving out parts, trying to paint some pic about how he's the sh. & poor him type vibes. Bc he's everything.. What adult is that invested in ppl like that? When he really just acts like he's jealous of everyone!!! if there wasn't enough going on in their lives/ heads... first off u damn old geezer you're washed up & uncool. They don't even wanna f w/ u like that. Theyre just most likely trying to be polite bc you're an idk- ELDER. Social cues much? How embarassing. They prob don't even want to f w/ him even for good xs. & predictably he's always got all these questionable imaginary "bitches" ( that wouldn't even bother w/ him either) that r half his age. Somexs they're my age & he has to let it be known. 1 of the many many many many reasons I can't stand the dude! He's disgusting! The lowest of the lowest wouldn't even want that. 1) u don't have sh. Not even a car. 2) u don't save = u have no $. 3) u room mate it up w/ ur own son. Lol, when could he possibly even have the chance to get it on. Bc shouldn't u have been building yourself since waaaaay back?! Ironic how his crutch is bc mommy died. Mommy who gave him everything. Which every chance he gets, "you would've loved her. She would've bought u anything u wanted..." gah damn this dude. I've never seen such huge of a mooch. Ever. Scrawny mia grill lookin crackhead. It's funny to me how he thinks I'm missing out on so much if he bails. Kind of a little sad for my hubby on how he desperately yearns for him. No matter what. But it's also a reason on y he's such a lil b about sh. Makes me actually admire how much my dad's been through & all the actual typical male behavior he displays. Building foundations from the ground up. Literally too. And I dont even like the dude.
There but not there, only recently realizing how much that messed me up
4:05 this scene is personally for me very heartbreaking it reminds me of my childhood while i was sleeping i was always woken up by the light of the living room and every time i went check what’s going on it was my mother drinking alone this scene just reminds me of her
Sometimes a father is not physically absent, but he is emotionally absent. I think that one hurts way more.
That's what atheism and protestantism does. You are right
@Telepture No, it's this one you're referring to czcams.com/video/wd8IwAekty0/video.html
Physically is worse
@@ausername1972 Just tell us you were neglected
@@buttnakedsnake9357 and what exactly makes you think that? Because I said something any common person would say?
My dad is an abusive alcoholic and my mom left us. For a year, she hasn't even tried contacting me nor my little brother, she instead lived secretly with her boyfriend. I remember couple of nights, sitting with my drunk father in the living room and him telling me with shaking voice, that we have to stick together, because we are all he has.
This animation just brought all of that back to me after a year of running away from him.
Sometimes it's nice to remember the pain, if pain is all that is left.
Greetings from Slovakia
Edit: omg thank u so much for ur likes and very kind comments! Things r getting better now since I'm going to be taken away by orphanage in 2-3 weeks and to be honest, I'm kind of excited! Again, thank u all for being so nice ❤️
Hang in there, life gets better.
Muselo to být velmi těžké, přeji štěstí do budoucna
At least hes there ...
yea use to see my dad get drunk and my mom and dad getting into huge yelling arguments dishes plates were a common thing to find in the trash at my house hold
I feel you
they always say that you can tell them anything, but it never actually feels like you can. you see how they treat people when they share their problems with them, and you feel like you either have to bottle it up only to explode later or you have to suck it up and tell him only to get shut down.
this video hits way too close to home.
this truly was beautiful, even though the dad had an addiction to alcohol, he loved his son, and his son, understanding both things, loved him back.
and yet, somehow it is exactly whats making his life the suffering that he wants to get away from
@@djolo5140 all I’m saying is it can be worse but yea toxic relationship.
@@djolo5140 Yeah he loves his fatehr too much to leave him, when he really wants too
hey did u miss the point of this
That type of dependence is not real love lol! That's called being a shit father
I've had my dad living with me for about a year. Then he left, going from place to place, continuing his path of self-destruction. I haven't spoken to him for years. This one hit home. Especially the "we're in this together" thing I remember. But in the end, it was all about him.
wow, wouldnt have thought you watch these kind of videos, keep up the good work, both of y'all!
Strange finding you here! Lone wolf :)
i love your vids
Cant assume anything but im going through some similar stuff.
Become Unconquerable from your videos helped me get a brighter vision. I truly hope this situation can get better
What a nice surprise seeing you here, recently started watching all of your buddhism and stoicism videos. Man have they helped. (:
My parents got divorced when I was 6, mother left my dad for another man. I spent one half of the week with mom, and the other with my dad, gradually shifting towards him - it was more comfortable for me for some reason, I felt more connected with him. Now I’m 21, living with my girlfriend in, like, 15 minutes from my dad, seeing him every couple of weeks. I’m very proud of him - despite being left like that, he seems to have forgiven my mom, as they talk like old friends when they meet. He has a nice job, goes to the gym and looks like 40-45, being actually 57. That’s probably one of the best possible role models a boy can have. Love you, dad
How did your mom's relationship pan out?
You unlocked the 'good ending'...
In my case my father became a super abusive violent drunkard when my mom left him, I'm still have a lot of scars physically,mentally and emotional ones... Still, I forgive him for all he has done when he was dying, was the only one that not left him.
I wont forgive ill sta . B
mother left my dad for another man.
-Hypergamy Proverbs
Nice comment. Hit me in the feels.
Narcissism is a large part of the boomer generation.. me me me , A guy online once told me he was talking to his dad on the phone about not having enough money for his kids dentist appointments . His dad just changed the subject and got bored and started talking about himself.... Then about a few days later his dad calls him all excited on how he bought this old BMW motorcycle and laughed about how he didn't even want it but couldn't resist spending the money...
Damn the excuses, the bad habits, the unwillingness to change,the false promises to change, the pretending to know what you’re talking about, the mother leaving and the dad not taking responsibility for it. This is all too accurate for me and my relationship with my father. Especially the guilt tripping him into staying with him, then, to what I will assume to happen next, him staying in his ways because he knows he’s gotten away with it all over again..
I was lucky to never have a father like this, he was always a hard worker. The sad part of this story is it makes it harder that he's gone now.
I dont know how that feels but soon ı will become an actual adult and that is one of the worst things ı can imagine because ı cant even talk with my family. Sorry for you loss even if ı dont understand you be strong man you can be a mountain if you want.
@@howlingwolf9906 ik even I can't look anyone in the eye even my family but I am trying to improve myself in school and and least straightening my posture so that I can be as confident as I was before
I'm sorry to hear that, may he Rest in Peace.
@@crazyraptor2907 hope you do that mate. I hope all of have good families and jobs.
Sometimes I think that if he wouldn't been a great father, I wouldn't miss him so much...
One of the hardest parts about growing up is realizing that your parents aren't the heros you thought they where.
Be blessed you have the mental capacity to do so, many can't take the concept.
@@jackvalentine7403 They dont want to, youd understand this if youd actually knew how it was.
@@eeurr1306 oh yeah, I forgot you were there every second of my life and know me so well. Sorry.
Opposite is true in my live
@@jackvalentine7403 I cant see what you typed for some reason
My dad is one of those mostly emotionless, narcissistic assholes with the occasional moments of empathy and kindness. His soul is shattered and he suffers, and because of it so does everyone around him. I moved out years ago but I still feel that conflict of wanting to be close and wanting to never see him again.
Żabka to zawsze jest miejsce w którym może spotkać cię wszystko.ogółem myślę że wszyscy pracownicy tej oto żaby mieli jakieś /wciąż mają pogmatwane dzieciństwo. Za tymi smutnymi oczami pewnie znajduje się tyle interesujących historii.
My dad was toxic as hell, I enlisted in the military because nothing I did made him proud of me and it wasn't enough.
I decided to cut him out of my life and I became better and broke the cycle with my kids.
Well done m8 wish you the best with your life journey
Do you plan to forgive your father? I think it will free you from a lot of burden but i still haven't done it myself. When i want to, my mind screams not to do it with heavy emotions and invents excuses, its hard.
@@Sturmtruppe1997 i personally want to forgive my dad but yh my mind would torment me if I do I prolly cant for the time being
@@Sturmtruppe1997 Yes I have but don't want him in my life.
@@hisheeelijah1482 I understand. Last year i forgave my mum. It was realy hard, as you said my mind tormented me but the moment i got the 3 words out, it went away and all resentment was gone. If only i could say the same to my father. I think my fears and anger would finaly go away.
Remember guys!
It's up to us be better than our parents.
Don't do their mistakes, learn from them!
I will 100% be a better parent by never having kids.
@@yoshtheknife How can you be a parent with no human child?
@@yoshtheknife I mean if that's what you wanna do.
The cycle ends here. Be better than those before us.
@@PatrickMenesesYTOfficial4945 Says all generations. But it does get better each generation.
A good Father will always be remembered by the love he showed his children..
IT RANDOMLY MADE ME CRY
Same especially the part where the father said don’t leave me not like this
This brings to mind the question: "Who is the parent and who is the child in this relationship?"
Neither
Classic
Seeing NPCs just really hits hard and I can’t explain why.
Unrealised potential and the drudgery of the day to day…
It’s probably a combination of guilt at seeing others as robots (even if somewhat justified) and the discomfort that you will probably be seen that way by others
Yes
the fact that they are just in the background, epole you might never know and simply exist, die and you would be none the wiser , they lives have no meaning to us and minenial thinker intentionally or not, depicts them with these faces as these npc's to potentially highlight that
Orange man bad
2:00 that head tilt and the joining of the hands is.. rough. I know that feeling
Once, I was sat in my room and the temperature was around 30°C (86°F) wearing a shirt and long trousers. My dad thought it was a good idea to force me to wear shorts because he thought I was hot and suffering in silence. Apparently I was such a piece of shit I'm incapable of dressing myself. Ended up with his saliva all over my face and enough insults to last an eon. I take showers at 60°C to 65°C (140°F to 150°F) and I love it. Once got in a car at 50°C (122°F) and it didn't bother me. He wanted that much control over me. And yes, I got beat since I was 2 or 3, he switched to mental torture at about 16 and asked me to jump off a bridge NOT JOKINGLY many times. Too bad I got into a top 10 global uni for physics and my dreams will keep going, I'm currently in my 20's. IT'S NEVER TOO LATE. Imagine a family where the kid always tries to escape torture, and another where the kid feels like one with their family (positive reinforcement), this is how criminals are born.
I never met my father until I was 7, he acted exactly like this guy. I had to learn how to be a man to not make the same mistakes as my father did.
Proud of you, Row. Deciding not to follow him is hard but it's the hard and brave thing to do. It will be worth it.
Relatable +1000
Just like me, i never met my father until i Was 7, i hate him since that moment, imagine, you dont know this person but he start to cry to you when you dont act like he want, all my life he compare me to my cousins, "they eat faster than you, you always lose, you arent like me, when i had your age.... and he start to says a lot of bullshit. Yes, is stupid this comparation, but this happens, and a lot of stupid shit like this, how can yo have confidence if your own father talk to you like that...? Now, when he start to talk like he know everything about me, i remember him this kind of things he do, and he only say: thats was in the past, you need to grow up..... (i still learning english)
good for you dude I applaud you 👏🏻
@@Delverk You have a great English Delverk. I'm sorry fr what you've been through with your dad. Time will pass and you will be a free man - from his shadow and from hate. It's time to let yourself feel it because it will pull you further in life, motivate your to be better. It looks like time passes slow but its actually quite fast - and feelings we thought were forever are gone someday. You'll be a great man, have a great wife and family, and love will fullfill you in a way that the past will be gone, although you will carry the lessons you learned with you. Wish the best to you and all the people reading who went through the same.
Please bring up toxic mothers who manipulate their sons to stay at home even during their 30s. Millennials do that a LOT nowadays.
This^
OR bouns combo of engulfing toxic mother + emotionally absent neglectful bitter father. Can my ex ever snap out of that abuse-induced nightmare that condemns his life?
Yes
My mother nagged me into destroying my potential with this. Guilt trip after guilt trip. Gaslight after gaslight.
@@Endomatic0 yesh. But now you recognise that, it’s time to get out and give it a go.
I was constantly ridiculed for trying to do my own thing, by both so called friends and family, I succeeded for a while, then I failed, but I kept going. Got back up and, learning from my mistakes, went at it again.....
I’m older now, and recently lost both parents. I had to set a boundary and we didn’t speak for many years. It reset the relationship. The last decade they both apologised to me for things that happened. We finished well
I’ve learnt to stay focused on the outcome, ignore attacks and abuse, and importantly keep my head and my manner calm in emotionally charged situation, knowing that they can’t say anything that will change the way I feel. This grounded strength that comes from being true to myself and not giving a rat’s what others think.
This approach has worked for me in so many situations. The _No_ with a smile is such a powerful tool. Setting the standard for behaviour in a dignified and calm manner while the other person is losing it, has such an impact long term, and gained me a lot more respect from others who have witnessed such confrontations, and belated apologies for behaviour of those whom the confrontation was with.
Maybe it’s just my age. Maybe it’s because I don’t care what people think. Maybe it’s because I am honest with myself, and seek to make good on any mistakes I have made, and that those mistakes were not intentional.
This makes me appreciate my dad even more. He is a hard working man who always helped me when I needed him. I share great memories and moments with this man. As a child I saw him like a hero who could fix anything in and around the house. He drove more than a dozent times with us to austria, italy, france, poland etc. for vacation and drove this 3,5t camper over those narrow pass roads in the alps. Today my dad is 60 and iam 23, I live 60km away from home and study industrial engineering. I visit my parents every week. 2020 we still drove together to austria, but this time I drove the camper. love you dad, I got a good one.
Different circumstances but. For a while, my adoptive mother was very abusive to me, and I had a friend who dropped out of HS at 15 and was miserable working as a cashier to support herself, so I was too afraid to follow.
When I turned 17, we found out that her arm problems were caused by a disc pushing in on her spine. In almost 2 years, she lost most of the feeling in the right half of her body. I had to help her change, had to help her walk, had to wipe her ass, all the while she continued to hit and berate me. Still I didnt leave.
I lived like that, with her, in our grime and filth, until she finally had a heart attack a few years ago and like magic I was free. It feels so much better. But... I'm angry I didn't leave sooner, I'm so far behind everyone else now and I still feel like I'm 14. They're getting done with their Masters and I'm just... here, trying to pick up my pieces. But I know I'd have felt shame and guilt if I'd just left. She was my mom, and my sister took off as soon as she was legally able to, what was I supposed to do? Let her die in her own filth? I... I dunno. It's. Hard.
I genuinely feel sorry for anyone who didn't have a good father. I can't imagine how hard it must be.
No. No you don't.
@@MontChevalier What you mean, bro? I do feel sorry.
it is. Yeah..
@@MontChevalier i was bullied alot when i was a child. I thought i had it worst. I then learnt that most bullies are sad individuals that has survived and endured 5 times the amount of bad things i went through. How can i not feel sorry for you? Mayby if i was a phsycopath or a sociopath but i'm not.
@@Rivershield You can't imagine it. That's exactly it. But some of us, we don't have to imagine it.
2:35 This is real.
At least he is trying to be just emotionnaly usefull, my father litteraly left my familly 2 years ago for another wife.
I'm the oldest and still a teen, i must carry on to help my mother the most as i can. He isn't giving us any news exept that she already made a "new sister". Also i almost forget : he came in house to rob things and cut water and electricity, still seaching for the point of doing that
Their entire relationship is very coodependent, but ironically, the father is emotionally absent. The other parent is either emotionally absent or is physically absent, so the parent puts the role of a partner or companion to the child instead of having parent-child boundaries with it. The father here knows he would be nothing without his son and would end up alone, but he takes advantage of the fact that it's his son and guilt trips him if he leaves, knowing as he is his son, he is the only one that would tolerate him. But since he sees what his father is, he plans on leaving, so he makes his son feel unworthy if he leaves, because he knows that if his son leaves, all of the son's problems would go away.
People just shouldn’t have kids
if that were my father, i would drop his ass, leave him on his own. I would not let him ruin my future and not feel guilt or responsibility since hes a grown-ass man who decided to give birth to me and now not get his act together. Either he moves on and changes to be independant again or he can die in his apartment of alcohol poisoning for all i care. This is my future and my life and i let nobody ruin it, not even my own blood
@@Hawaiian_Pizza_Enjoyer if they cant bear or raise a child they shouldnt have.
@@howlingwolf9906
Mhm
@@Hawaiian_Pizza_Enjoyer what happened?
Jestem szczęśliwy że mój rodak robi takie pożyteczne i mądre filmy
Mhm
tak
MilleniaThinker co raz częściej dodawał polskie smaczki w filmikach to i musiał się pojawić taki komentarz w końcu xD
Ma potencjał być jednym z większych "polskich" youtuberów
@@wercengetoryks4579 Nooooo
What a horrible fate to suffer, life can be scary sometimes.
This really hit me in the feels. Good job.
Reminds me of a story I once read about a father and his adult son. The father was always drinking and was heavily flawed, but he loved his son very much.
What caused their relationship to be toxic was because the son was always taking care of him, as if he was the child and not the parent.
When the father killed himself and the son found his body, the son's first instinct was to 'put him back together and fix him' because that's what he's always done.
im blessed to have a caring and supportive father
You really are.
you are luky
It’s tragic that having a caring and supportive father is now considered lucky or blessed instead of just being the norm
Me too
@@maximilianoferrer6841 yeah, it should be the bare minimum, yet still considered as lucky. Having a supportive and caring family who doesn't emotionally, mentally(oh phisically) @bu$e you and mainpulate you and not support you or even care. Hating your family is considered bad, but having a good one is "rare/lucky". What has this society become?
Imagine to have a father like mine who is not a alcohol dependent, he's alive, he works, but he's basically absent.
The day my parents divorced, time ago , my father died with their marriage.
Forsaking marriage is a path that you can’t go back on, it’s actually such a vile thing especially with kids. It’s like their lack of faith in marriage ties to their lack of faith in God.
So he did it? He committed the S?
No he just disappeared lmao. I hear him trough phone once every few months
same here, no alcohol, no drugs, but after mom left he just goes to bed or yells, the only time he talks to me now is to lecture me or cry to me. i feel bad for wanting to move far away but it’s hard to handle being an emotional crutch to someone you don’t even know anymore.
The same for me, I have a Father with an Important job so I never see him, It’s like If he left us, since he left our Familiars like Grandpas, Uncles and that threat us differently. They hide things from us, never Invite us to important things like they used to. Because we don’t have who they cared for. And I can’t see my Mother’s familiars. I feel so alone sometimes, but anyways, It will get better, I hope
One of the hardest things in life is realizing our parents are as messed up as everyone else
when his father said "I only have you son" it just reminded me of my mom cause she really doesn't have anybody else and I just feel like if I'm not there for her something'll happen to her and I hate feeling like I'm responsible for her and then I just feel bad because we're not really that close and I blame myself for it because I never really made that much of an effort and by this point I just try not to see her that often hoping that maybe she'll try to focus on something different and better for her then then me..-
Abusive fathers are way worse than absent fathers, but both are extremely bad
Then they shame and make fun of people with absent fathers.
Yeah is not funny making jokes about not having a father I have no father and it’s not funny but I really don’t care to be honest it doesn’t hurt me seeing jokes like this
@@dinosharttt Me either.
My father was absent not through choice and it took me 25 years to learn that
Both is pretty bad, but the one thing is worse is having a shitter Father figure who puts bad thoughts into you've head about yourself.
My father is nothing like this guy here, but they are similar in their way of not accepting responsibility for their actions.
UPDATE: To all of you asking how I posted this comment before the video is up, I am one of Millenia’s patrons. You can find my name at the end of the video, Frank T. Wang.
Same
Same
How tf is your comment from an hour ago
same
HOW U COMMENT ONE HOUR AGO 💀💀💀💀
So heartbreaking yet beautifully crafted
I am blessed to have a father that stopped drinking for 14 years just after I was born. He is a decent man and I completely respect him and do not take his presence for granted.
Why are you all so lucky to get such parents 😭😭😭
I sometimes envy to you'll ppls ... please don't offend it😢
i was in a similar position, just much worse with lots of abuse and no socialisation, i think my parents planned to get a house and to live there together, but personally i wanted to move away from all the abuse a long time ago, but they would not allow me to get a job, or to become independent, they wanted me to focus on my education, anything else was irrelevant
they didnt want me to leave but wanted me to pay money once i got my job and then one day it just got too bad and when they were sleeping i simply left in the middle of the night to never return
at that time luckily i already had a job and was secretly renting a flat, because i knew the day would come when it will become unbearable to live with them
i know its a sad story and i wish it wouldnt havr to come this far, but i couldnt let them have control over me for the rest of my life and dictating me what to do, while also abusing and neglecting me
it was a decision i had to make for my own sanity
i am so sorry to hear that man
are you okay now?
was that recent or years in the past?
how is your relationship with your parents now?
sorry for spamming, im just very interested in your story
I'm sorry to hear that and good on you for doing that. It's not easy. It's funny how family can be either a fantastic thing or a horrible thing. I didn't have it as bad as you, but I am so different from my parents in everything i do and opinions I have that I simply couldn't handle it anymore. They have always been supportive but somehow I feel like they are complete strangers to me and that there is no connection between us. I finally moved out and I can finally be myself. As long as you live at your parents you are under their control. It works if you have a great connection with your family, but for people like you and me it's never going to work in our favor and it's gonna feel like a prison.
This is exactly the right way to handle such a situation. Leaving secretly so they couldn't convince you to stay was a good choice
@@Luffa187 bro i am in the same situation, i have no connection with them
how are you? i hope you are doing fine
As if any parent accepts what actions they commit these days.
This is so true. It's like nobody wants to admit that good/bad parenting can actually have an effect on a child's life.
Nothing that happens is anybody's fault these days.
@Goosa Poosa im sorry that you have to go through that,you are strong to be honest.
Though you still have your freinds,and your other family member,and even i here and problably more people who is on your side and will always be.
im proud of you,and other people are problably are too!
@Goosa Poosa Send more then lol
Despite having toxic parents I remain faithful because will is important than sanity.
This... hits close to home. I dont blame nobody except me for my mistakes, but i lose a lot of time and mental health trying to "help" my father in his problems, severe of then wanted by himself, and when i get bored of all this shit and tell him thats these arent my problems, he get mad and says "okay go, do whatever you want" and start to says that he have health problems, is not young, its alone, etc etc...
Its not a bad father, he aslo helps and suppport me in severe things, but sure is toxic and manipulative sometimes
*They say the secret of narcissism is the shape of their brains actually but thats no excuse not to try, its stupidity.*
I learned from my alcoholic and violent father how not become like him in the future.
Same
Exactly the same , greetings from Romania
Yeah same here, i know for sure i am not touching alcohol... This shit wrecked my man. I miss when i was just an innocent kid, where it was mild, when he used to care about me and i viewed him as hero. Now hes just nothing more than a dude i see sometimes biking to the store for backback full of beer with puffy, scratched face.
Sometimes the only lesson is 'what not to do' but if we can break the cycle with our kids we have done enough. Be warned: make effort to heal before you get married even if you need therapy or to be single for a while, you might not be the abuser you grew up with, but a lot of times abuse victims seek out partners that mirror their parents that are abusers, you will Not see it coming.. unless you have fully healed. No one deserves round 2 of abuse as an adult..take care of yourselves
@@LDuke-pc7kq 'victims seek out partners that mirror their parents'
this is more often than not a typical case of taking what you can get. men with psychological scars are seldom lady slayers, they are not drowning in prime poon as their anxieties and wants cripple their interaction with the rival sex. this in turn prevents them from having their pick of undamaged young minxes who would make fine companion for them. so they are often caught between a rock and a hard place, either enduring an unwanted dry spell or settling for subpar notch. the outcome in either case is painfully predictable.
As a recent highschool graduate that was being “raised” in a family with an alcoholic step-dad, this is heavily relatable due to the amount of trauma I have dealt with during the past 5 years.
Yeah i can relate dude
Be strong boy.
im sorry to hear that bro
What is up with step dads and their atrocious reputation in the West? It is like I barely hear any good anecdotes about them.
At least he is your stepdad, you are not emotionally connected to him like someone is to his real father, and imagine that real father is also very abusive and he is beating you, so the mixture of love for your father and fearing him everyday thinking is it now when he will beat me again, and living like that for almost 20 years make such an impact on your subconcious. The worst thing is he is not even alcoholic or anything that would cloud his mind, so you're asking yourself, does he hate you or is it something else...
When I saw this video a few weeks ago I cried tears of joy. I wasn't really aware of how much luck I do have, having a father such as mine. I'm really grateful for him, he's always listening when I tell him something, he's giving me tips about many life situations, we can joke about everything and he's overall a great husband to my mother and a caring father to my sister and I. When I'm an adult I want to be like him. I wish him the best and hope he's living a long fullfilled life with us, so we can spend many time with him. I'm sorry for everyone who doesn't had the chance to live with such a person or doesn't have a father at all. To those people I want to say that you guys can make it, don't give up and keep pushing yourself forward, you guys will find a person like this in the future and when you'll meet him/her you can always be proud of yourself that you didn't gave up. You made it and you'll now life the best life you've ever had. Thank you to everyone who read this far. I hope you will achieve everything you want and meet the person you always wanted to have by your side. Have a good day/night.
Thank you God for everything
Everyday I think about my father. He has always been abscent in my life, not physically, I live with him.
I have never feel love from him, when I try to talk with him about something important he ignores me and laughs, even when i think he loves me a little, I realize that's not true. The only things he do "for me" are actually because of my mom, like, he would do it so my mom doesn't have to, which is okay, but the point is that it's never about me, he doesn't think about me, about how I feel, he always thinks I'm wrong, if I try to tell him that he is wrong and he's hurting me he just tells me to shut up and say that I'm an stupid and bad-mannered piece of shit.
I still remember that night my parents where arguing, they were in the kitchen, i entered to take something for dinner but then he told me to stay there. He said to stop only trusting my mom, to stop talking only with her, that since then I had to tell all to him and not my mom, that it was my obligation, without caring about my feelings and that my mom is the only person I trust. Since I didn't do that, he has never tried to be a good father. He always justifies himself by saying that I don't trust him because of my mom, he says my mom has never let him educate me, and that's not true, he has never cared about me, and my mom has to do everything he never does for me.
I hate him, I can't even feel compassion for him, I can't lie and tell I don't want him to die, because yes, I want him to, I want him to disappear from this world, or if that's not possible, I want to see him suffer for all what he have done to my mom and me. I don't need him. He's not my family, and I will never forgive him.
Ugh... My father is legit so awful he makes this one look like a saint.
Seriously. I would have rather had this father than the one I got.
At least this father, despite his many faults and dysfunctionality, loves his son and genuinely wants to spend time with him and would never leave him.
Call me old fashioned, but empathizing with his trauma, I wouldn't leave him because he never left me.
I guess that comes with being smarter and stronger (not heartless). To me, this father is internally a hurt child. The least I could do is care for him the same way he cared for me through his hurt and depression while he worked to support me when his wife left.
Maybe it's my flaw, but I have enough of heart to empathize with his loss.
... Besides, it's not like he beat wojak in drunken anger for having a differing opinion or disagreeing.
To me, this father only wants someone to listen. This father could've left with other deadbeats like him on their path to self destruction like him, leaving Wojack completely alone or worse.
I understand why he held onto his son.
You see... His son is all that is left of his ex wife and the memories they shared.
Again... It's a shame. I'm not saying this ok. What I'm saying is that it's a damned shame our fathers make this one seem like a saint.
Hope your life gets better, and everyone's in your family
@@thetreatment498
Too old and too late for that now. Your sentiment isn't lost on me however.
@@jakobrose8278 If you don't mind sharing, what happened?
@@jakobrose8278 never too old never too late. How are you?
Some people should never have children, that’s a fact
Me. Too late though
@@OtherDalfite I tried in the past lol, turns out I was lucky enough to not give children,saved me lots of troubles, just try to live by example, teach your children the issues of being a grown up, to learn discipline and to stick to long term plans, that might be enough for him to make you proud one day, good luck friend.
My parents shouldn’t have had me.
Yeah I shouldn’t have been born
@@oneaboveallferrarifan2725 thank you. He's not born yet, but I hope to be a good father to him
This hit me in my feels. My dad didn’t engage in the verbal guilt trips like this guy, but I was definitely beholden to support him in my teenage years. He was super dependent and our situation could have ended up like Wojak and dad here, but mine passed away when I was 18 after I just started college.
I was afraid to think about leaving my dad, but every so often I thought about how one day I’d have to.
I mostly took my father for granted growing up. It's only now as a college student that I'm starting to appreciate the struggles he went through to raise me. I honestly feel ashamed that I took a good man for granted when I could have very well ended up like the guy in this video
But's better late than never, Mihir. It's good to see you've reached this point. I pray you have plenty of time to cherish him.
If your dad is still alive no time like the present to reconnect with him. My oldest younger sister is permanently kicking herself since she spent most of her life having as little as possible to do with our mom and being lousy to her any time mom reached out to her since Ma died suddenly a few days shy of her 59th birthday and my sister will never have the chance to make amends as Ma is no more.
@DonDoesProgramming it can be a wild card. I got way further than my dad at life using what he did in given situations as an example of what NOT to do. He's a good man and he did all he could, but he just gave up too easily with things. One thing is that my dad had many years of education, but no degree since he bombed his final exams. Without a degree he could only work regular jobs despite having an advanced education. That alone would eat me up inside, so I vowed whatever I majored in I would complete if not just to live better than I did as a boy.
You can make it up to him by being successful enough to where he can brag about you
Please do a toxic mothers video in the future. I want to relate....
toxic sons better
YES
@@bane8305 adopted toxic sons better
@@FrangoTraidor nooo cuz that would just be a typical son mad at the stepdad for obvious reasons.... we wanna see real toxic sons reasons for being toxic to the father
Even though I don't have any toxic parents at all, the ending of the video made me really sad and heartbroken when he asks for him not to leave. It just hits really hard when you think about it.
It is unbelievable how accurate all these videos are! Keep them coming it helps people wake up and be aware of their reality
Its weird actually, to think in retrospective how prvileged with childhood was with a normal, non absent father that actually cared for his family. I actually believed this was the norm until I became an adult and figured out it was more of the exception.
That mostly depends where you live. In some areas maybe it is common? But In other areas It can also be uncommon.
Same…
I must be the same for mine
Same, my dad is amazing and very loving! I always knew that I was lucky to have him because spending time at friend's houses I realized a lot of dads are toxic to their families sadly.
im so happy you guys had that though
My dad is VERY SIMILAR to this one. My father met my mom around high-school and had me around 25-26. God bless my mother's soul for all she's done for us. But my father? He can go to hell. Went to jail twice, currently lives with his girlfriend, and he's a narcissistic sociopath. He manipulated me twice (He made it sound like he apologized.) and yelled at me. When I turned sixteen, I no longer wanted him in my life and haven't heard from him since. Men, go after your own definition of manhood and learn from your mistakes. Being a man isn't equivalent to getting lots of women, sleeping around and having kids with them.
Thanks for this
That last dialogue almost made me cry, good job man
This makes me grateful that I spent all those years with my dad heavily involved in boy scouts.
Shiet. My dad is the best man I've ever met, and if I die being half a man he was, I'll think of myself as a sucessful man. However, I wish to see your take on toxic mothers
I'm pretty sure my mother, not to mention my late grandmother (HER mother) broke my father, to finish off the crap that my paternal great-grandmother started.
I was lucky. Both my parents were great. My mom was a super hard worker, and my dad never drank in his life. But they weren't afraid to do what they had to do when I stepped out of line.
@@theboombody youre extremely, extreme lucky for having two great parents
@@justawlwwholikesshygirls5704 Is it possible many people have great parents and just don't realize it? A lot of kids demonize their parents just because their parents set limitations on what bad behaviors they are allowed to do. Parents have to do that.
@@theboombody it's not always about strictness.
Its about things like neglect, shaming, pressuring etc. There are nasty things one can do, even to their children. Strict parents aren't toxic at all, they just raise their children differently.
Just because few spoilt children demonize their parents, doesn't mean it's common.
Infact, shitty parents are alot more common than you think. Possibly because people have kids when they really shouldn't.
I'm lucky, my dad is the best dad of the world
x2
Great writing
One of the things I've been learning is that for you to get a better life, you have to leave behind those who drag you down - mainly if they're your parents / parental figures.
Not saying you have to hate them or them hate you. Not saying you have to never talk again.
Saying just that you have to lead your own life and decisions, not needing their approval or support. You have to be your own person.
Or take advantage of them and be a good boy because I loved money.
The fact that me and my dad have had exact same conversations like this makes me sad, like LITERALLY WORD FOR WORD, thats just insane man
Same.
This one hits closer to home then I would like to admit.
wow man this is a great consequences it literally tell me how was life and how much do u really need to sacrifices for school this is a great it inspire me :)
This is why I don't think I'd ever want to be a father. My success can be my children's success but my failures can ruin their lives not just mine.
It is this level of insight and healthy doubt that will make you a good father.
stop being a coward
I just don't want to be a dad because I'm immature lol
Kratos is an example of we should follow.
@@PatrickMenesesYTOfficial4945 who's Kratos?
these videos are starting to get so realistic i start to wonder if these are reflections of his life
They're reflections of all or most our lives as modern day young men
Lets say that it reflects a solid 50% of my life
im guessing they are
@@SonicRiders sadly yes
@@lengisen9637 we'll make it bro
Yo these videos always crack me up
this fr hit home man but the dad reminds me of my mother
My parents literally had this exact attitude and drove me into a depression. Toughest 5 years of my life.
Now i ignore all of the pessimistic crap they say. I take risks, belive in myself and now I'm actually making some headway in world.
Damn, i for one cannot stand people who drank constantly...sorry for anyone who actually had a Dad like this.
My dad used to be a drinker he quitted it but he still the same
Alcohol just takes the sting out of life sometimes. At times it feels like all I have.
My grandfather was like this, drank so much his whole adult life even grandma wouldn't live with him anymore. I met him a few times in an assisted living facility, not for his being old but from drinking his mind down to mush, he already drank himself into the place around age 60. Couldn't even really understand him as his words were all slurred and his movements were all twitchy and uncoordinated. Even as a little boy of 5 it was blatant evidence too much drinking WILL fuck you up, as other times Dad and I would visit his dad who was about the same age as that grandpa still working at the fire station like an old gigachad by contrast sharp as a tack full of pith and vinegar. It showed me to leave drinking alone lest I wound up like my mom's dad.
Sorry to hear that boys....everyone has their battles, and everyone fights it differently. However Alcohol is pretty much poison, drink responsibly and never rely on Alcohol or any form of stimulant to give you long term pleasure, because it won't.
Don't scarifies your body and mind for short term pleasure, find another way.
Yeah it sucked. My dad stopped drinking alcohol and he is a MUCH better person now. Goes for runs regularly, juggles work well, raises us well, has a great sense of humour and is a great dude all around. 10/10 love him so much
things like this make me grateful for having such a great family.
This video really gave me appreciation for my Father, thanks MT.
laughed my ass off when the dad says, "it's a long ass corridor".
I am 30 years old, since 12 years ago I didn't have relationship with my father. I think is better this way, was painful to understand but now I know that decision was extremely wise.
Be good to him maybe he will cut you in will.
@@PatrickMenesesYTOfficial4945 that's usually a good advice for a 18-20 years old guy. I am 30 he was abusive and didn't give a rat shit what happens to me. For him I was just a pair of hands able to work "wasting" time in the university.
Yo, the last phrases were so deep that a tear got down my face and hit the sheet on my bed.
Relatable.
Damn this is raw!
My step dad walked out on us in the middle of the night a few months ago and stole $5,000 from me on the way out. After he got all of my money stolen 3 days after he left he calls regularly to beg for help.
@UC2tShpIHhTLKgRc8-LjCRjg the video is about toxic father's. I'm sharing my experience
Tell him to f*ck off, you shouldn't forgive him for what he did.
I know it hurts but pls dont forgive him
@@sanmartinovallevictorjuven5187 ok anonymous armchair advice giver who is definitely an expert in family relationships and an authorized intellectual that you should trust for family advices instead of mr fake depressed discord user who would potentially make your life miserable and regretful
@@LordOfChaos.x refer to the message on top of this.
You have no rights to tell a person to do anything if you dont have the experience or knowledge
They can choose their own path.
And thus this guy may just be like any other youtube user and is faking family issues for fame so your 'advices', although bad, will still be put in waste
Not sure he rises to the level of "toxic"--I think he's just a man who's given up on life.
He has given up but his son hasn't, why drag him down too? Doesn't it make the father toxic?
Yes but his son should not suffer his choices. That's what's toxic
yeah a lot of the guys in this comment section are a bit soft, the father in the video isn’t so bad, he’s just really depressed and lonely
@@paulj.montebon1421 that’s not what toxic means, that’s just life
@@Archonsx Do you know why some toxic relationship exists ? Because sometimes whe don't know we are in one or that we are the cause of it. Maybe it's the son's choice of staying even though he is well aware of the situation. Then yeah that's life, sometimes we don't understand why people do that. You are allowed to be depressed and lonely but if you don't do anything to change your situation than you're just a big fucking loser and a waste of everyone's time and resources. They will breed, multiply and become a pandemic and one day the whole world will be trapped in their toxic relationship. And on that day we have the choice to say that's life or that we get up of our fat asses and make a change.
These videos instill such a powerful sense of dread and I don’t know why
i have an alcoholic mom and i relate to this so much. its much worse than them just leaving forever. they are a burden and hold you back. its really hard to explain, because on the outside they are a functioning human. at least in my case.
My parents are in a purely legal relationship, never had a big wedding (just went down to the courthouse in suits and signed a paper), Don't sleep in the same bed and rarely show any amount of affection to each other. The only time I see them emotionally together is competing for my affection which isn't that reassuring. I always suspect they're cheating on each other or have some kind of unspoken agreement but I have no idea how you could live your life like than and then have a kid.
People think having a kid will fix problems
@@TwoDollarGararge I don't know how the relates to the comment but fax. People think kids will fill you with joy, they do but you have to sacrifice so much for kids. If you're not willing to sacrifice then don't have children.
Your parents sounds like they settled for eachother
The relationship of ur parents is the same as me and my husband's marriage. We also only have civil wedding. We both arent inlove but we do care for each other. He was an international student here in canada when i met him and got married because he needed someone to sponsor him while i needed a place to stay. We have been married for 6 yrs but act more like best friends lol
im so lucky to have my dad. although sometimes his arguments might not be reasonable, hes still a hard-worker. he handles my moms toxic traits, his offices drama and etc. i'll always have respect for him.
Ok cool
Same can relate, i have mad respect for my dad and care for him, he works hard, helps other people, puts up with my moms bs, and trys his best to care for me. My mother i have a hard time seeing eye to eye with, and she's on that fine line of having anger issues, but my dad's a good man
Dude that's facts you just made me feel like a good person keep up dat good work
If I had stayed with my father instead of my mother when they both broke up my life could be very related to this, it gives me goosebumps in all my body.
You know your way, you just need to be aware that you know it.
02:53 .. thats killing me
My step father had a rough childhood me and my sis, saw him all the time drunk and mentally abusing us because we said him that he drank a little to much, my lil bro is being abused and tormented by this child like father who just gives him casually a ps4 pro at 4 years old, and feeding him the most unhealty shit in the world, the funny thing is that he even argues with him when he drinks, like a fucking 8 yo child, and then gives him what he wants, to this day i dont know why my mother had chosen this man for being a father or a husband for that matter
Because he gives the family monetary support and success.
But that sadly isn’t a real replacement for emotional support I guess
Any time I want to get depressed, this channel exists. Thanks.
A son and father bond never truly break remember there's always something behind it (after watching the whole video im actually in tears)
This video made me remind of my father so much, not because he was a bad father, but because he was great and I didn’t appreciate him when I was younger. Now that I’m 29 I understand perfectly all the things he did for me. Thanks dad, wherever you are.