In Jesus name Amen! Oh my goodness brother this devotion and your commentary with the scripture was amazing, God orchestrated- could not have been more perfectly said. This psalm is very near to my heart because it was given to me by a stranger in a time of absolute destitution…I’ll share. Somewhere near the end of 2013 my desire to be nearer to God, to not be of little Christian substance- I was lukewarm then, so I prayed that God would give me more faith. I knew what I was asking of Him, I knew the gravity of it, I’ve asked for patience before and He responded by placing me in situations where I had to be patient, it wasn’t comfortable. But asking for faith, I knew He would place me in a situation where I needed to have faith in Him and Him alone… so it wasn’t without some fear that I asked to be honest. January of 2014, the apex of my complete exhaustion had come to a point where I needed to go to my doctor. I did, I went through lots of testing and a month later was called to a hematologist who specializes in blood and bone cancers and I got my diagnosis of CLL (chronic lymphocytic leukaemia). It shook me to my core, I’m the first in my family to be diagnosed with cancer. Shocking even to myself, I became very angry and dangerously bitter - and this emotion was one I swear, I could not control. I was hard to live with, I needed someone to understand me, I was upset that no one came with me to my appointment, I was scared because my husband kept sweeping it under the rug like it was no big deal and no one felt comfortable talking about it, I even lost a few friends sadly. Even my doctors couldn’t help, they couldn’t tell me that I would make it out ok. I had no one. But I had God who quietly stood with me, allowing me to go through the internal chaos, depression, fear, anxiety, anger etc. All along I prayed, I begged Him to help me, I asked Him to forgive me for how I was responding to others. And yet the bitterness continued spilling out, as stated, I could not on my own strength control it. I was utterly weak and a mess, my body was out of my control I felt. A whole year and a half went by like that, still angry, nobody was helping or comforting my spirit but one day I saw my little daily devotion book, so I opened it and it spoke about not letting ourselves sink so far into the abyss of bitterness that it is impossible to get out. I felt it was meant for me because I was going straight for that abyss. I prayed and remembered all the while that I asked for faith and though I was in this terrible state of anger, bitterness and resentment to those around me because they couldn’t help me - no one could, not even the doctors we place our hope in. The ONLY help I had, was Jesus. And I had to put all my faith in Him. Few months later, I had a doctors appointment and they called a few days earlier to let me know that that my family dr was out for a few days but she had a dr subbing for her. I said ok but later found myself to not be ok with seeing a new dr to get my medication refills. I was very close to cancelling the appointment many times but, a still small voice said Go to the appointment. Day of the appointment I wanted to cancel, I was still in fight or flight with my emotions and wanted none it, but again the still small voice said, no, go to the appointment. So I did. I was so scared and so exhausted but put up a brave and friendly front the best I could. Well this doctor was a lovely silver haired gentleman with the kindest most loving eyes, I could tell he cared about me, the person behind the problem (makes me tear up to think of it). I told him a tiny bit about what was going on and he turned to me and told me about the Bible. Then he started speaking the word of God into my situation - everything I prayed about, every fear that crossed my mind over the last 2 years, this doctor addressed with scripture…. It felt like the roof blew off the office and God Himself showed up and He Himself was talking to me and brother I swear to our great God, bitterness and anger left me, it was gone. The doctor wrote down psalm 103 and told me to remind myself of this everyday. He then wrote down a video to watch - it was a 1964 sermon about what faith is, and he showed me a page called the truth about cancer. I walked out of that hospital clinic changed completely and filled with joy! God gave me hope, my hope was in Him and He could do anything, He is bigger than anything the world or the enemy could throw at me and He alone calls the shot… no one and nothing can take me out unless He says so! JOY!!!! It was the worst best time of my life! We have no idea what our God can do! We are so loved and He is so very involved, even when we are tried in the fire, He is there with us! Praise God forever! I know this is long but this devotion really brought this to the forefront, if anyone else is dealing with this, I pray this will give them hope. Bless you all in the loving name of our incredible saviour, Jesus Christ 💕
Sis this testimony is AMAZING, and a True testament to the loyalty and love of our Lord in all our lives each and every day. Mine is different but the same scene, ... I was bitter and wandering, not knowing where I should go, trying to find my place after almost everything I had worked for had been all but taken away. Every avenue, a failure, every activity, a waste of time. And that nagging feeling of a seared conscience... BUT GOD! Woke me up with a shake, and the words "Get ready. He's coming" in my heart. I heard it, but didn't hear it. It was more like someone else was speaking inside of me and not my own internal voice. It was the Holy Spirit. The rest is history, and lemme tell ya it's been a lot of work getting here... work I would gladly do again. Bless you dear sister and thank you for sharing so much of your life here. These testimonies tell a story about us and our lives with God, and open a door in others hearts that read these testimonies so at the very least they know they are not alone because in the end we realize we are not all that different, and that after it's all finished we will all realize I think that we all walked the same path, just with different perspectives...
@@lonecrusaider AMAZING brother!!!! It’s so true… I’m in awe that you understand the bitterness and anger that comes with illness too, a lot of people don’t speak about it, but this just shows that God brings His children together! Praise God…. It’s definitely a hard road but we, His children are walking it together, our strides may be somewhat different but the path is the same. That is also exactly how I heard that voice telling me to go to my appointment, it was inside me but someone else’s voice. The Holy Spirit - God is so very good! 💕
Yes ma'am, I know that bitterness all too well... and I don't like it at all. Praise God it's gone forever and the eternal love of Jesus Christ has taken it's place.
The Lord has answered so many prayers throughout my life. God is so amazing and He has NEVER failed me. He leads me where I need to be so that I can grow in faith, that I might better do His will, Never forgetting to be thankful and give Him All the glory and praise He rightfully deserves.
Amen. Praying for an awakening unto God in these last days.. and God is revealing the truth with physical proof of His word... So there will be NO excuse of not knowing. Praying for you. Love and appreciate you brother. God bless 🙏
In Jesus name Amen! Oh my goodness brother this devotion and your commentary with the scripture was amazing, God orchestrated- could not have been more perfectly said. This psalm is very near to my heart because it was given to me by a stranger in a time of absolute destitution…I’ll share.
Somewhere near the end of 2013 my desire to be nearer to God, to not be of little Christian substance- I was lukewarm then, so I prayed that God would give me more faith. I knew what I was asking of Him, I knew the gravity of it, I’ve asked for patience before and He responded by placing me in situations where I had to be patient, it wasn’t comfortable. But asking for faith, I knew He would place me in a situation where I needed to have faith in Him and Him alone… so it wasn’t without some fear that I asked to be honest.
January of 2014, the apex of my complete exhaustion had come to a point where I needed to go to my doctor. I did, I went through lots of testing and a month later was called to a hematologist who specializes in blood and bone cancers and I got my diagnosis of CLL (chronic lymphocytic leukaemia). It shook me to my core, I’m the first in my family to be diagnosed with cancer.
Shocking even to myself, I became very angry and dangerously bitter - and this emotion was one I swear, I could not control. I was hard to live with, I needed someone to understand me, I was upset that no one came with me to my appointment, I was scared because my husband kept sweeping it under the rug like it was no big deal and no one felt comfortable talking about it, I even lost a few friends sadly. Even my doctors couldn’t help, they couldn’t tell me that I would make it out ok. I had no one. But I had God who quietly stood with me, allowing me to go through the internal chaos, depression, fear, anxiety, anger etc.
All along I prayed, I begged Him to help me, I asked Him to forgive me for how I was responding to others. And yet the bitterness continued spilling out, as stated, I could not on my own strength control it. I was utterly weak and a mess, my body was out of my control I felt.
A whole year and a half went by like that, still angry, nobody was helping or comforting my spirit but one day I saw my little daily devotion book, so I opened it and it spoke about not letting ourselves sink so far into the abyss of bitterness that it is impossible to get out. I felt it was meant for me because I was going straight for that abyss. I prayed and remembered all the while that I asked for faith and though I was in this terrible state of anger, bitterness and resentment to those around me because they couldn’t help me - no one could, not even the doctors we place our hope in. The ONLY help I had, was Jesus. And I had to put all my faith in Him.
Few months later, I had a doctors appointment and they called a few days earlier to let me know that that my family dr was out for a few days but she had a dr subbing for her. I said ok but later found myself to not be ok with seeing a new dr to get my medication refills. I was very close to cancelling the appointment many times but, a still small voice said Go to the appointment. Day of the appointment I wanted to cancel, I was still in fight or flight with my emotions and wanted none it, but again the still small voice said, no, go to the appointment. So I did.
I was so scared and so exhausted but put up a brave and friendly front the best I could. Well this doctor was a lovely silver haired gentleman with the kindest most loving eyes, I could tell he cared about me, the person behind the problem (makes me tear up to think of it). I told him a tiny bit about what was going on and he turned to me and told me about the Bible. Then he started speaking the word of God into my situation - everything I prayed about, every fear that crossed my mind over the last 2 years, this doctor addressed with scripture…. It felt like the roof blew off the office and God Himself showed up and He Himself was talking to me and brother I swear to our great God, bitterness and anger left me, it was gone. The doctor wrote down psalm 103 and told me to remind myself of this everyday. He then wrote down a video to watch - it was a 1964 sermon about what faith is, and he showed me a page called the truth about cancer.
I walked out of that hospital clinic changed completely and filled with joy! God gave me hope, my hope was in Him and He could do anything, He is bigger than anything the world or the enemy could throw at me and He alone calls the shot… no one and nothing can take me out unless He says so! JOY!!!!
It was the worst best time of my life! We have no idea what our God can do! We are so loved and He is so very involved, even when we are tried in the fire, He is there with us! Praise God forever!
I know this is long but this devotion really brought this to the forefront, if anyone else is dealing with this, I pray this will give them hope.
Bless you all in the loving name of our incredible saviour, Jesus Christ 💕
Sis this testimony is AMAZING, and a True testament to the loyalty and love of our Lord in all our lives each and every day. Mine is different but the same scene, ... I was bitter and wandering, not knowing where I should go, trying to find my place after almost everything I had worked for had been all but taken away. Every avenue, a failure, every activity, a waste of time. And that nagging feeling of a seared conscience... BUT GOD! Woke me up with a shake, and the words "Get ready. He's coming" in my heart. I heard it, but didn't hear it. It was more like someone else was speaking inside of me and not my own internal voice. It was the Holy Spirit. The rest is history, and lemme tell ya it's been a lot of work getting here... work I would gladly do again. Bless you dear sister and thank you for sharing so much of your life here. These testimonies tell a story about us and our lives with God, and open a door in others hearts that read these testimonies so at the very least they know they are not alone because in the end we realize we are not all that different, and that after it's all finished we will all realize I think that we all walked the same path, just with different perspectives...
@@lonecrusaider AMAZING brother!!!! It’s so true… I’m in awe that you understand the bitterness and anger that comes with illness too, a lot of people don’t speak about it, but this just shows that God brings His children together! Praise God…. It’s definitely a hard road but we, His children are walking it together, our strides may be somewhat different but the path is the same. That is also exactly how I heard that voice telling me to go to my appointment, it was inside me but someone else’s voice. The Holy Spirit - God is so very good! 💕
Yes ma'am, I know that bitterness all too well... and I don't like it at all. Praise God it's gone forever and the eternal love of Jesus Christ has taken it's place.
The Lord has answered so many prayers throughout my life. God is so amazing and He has NEVER failed me. He leads me where I need to be so that I can grow in faith, that I might better do His will, Never forgetting to be thankful and give Him All the glory and praise He rightfully deserves.
Each one of us of the House of Faith have this very testimony. Amen dear.
Amen. Praying for an awakening unto God in these last days.. and God is revealing the truth with physical proof of His word... So there will be NO excuse of not knowing. Praying for you. Love and appreciate you brother. God bless 🙏
No excuses at all...