Best HFY Reddit Stories: Nobody Told Them They Couldn't Do It
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- čas přidán 13. 09. 2024
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Xeno: lasers are fastest and best weapons.
Humans: hehe FTL rocks go brrrrrrr.
Go blip
Humans: “What happens if you remove the safeties on the FTL drives?” Followed by “How small can we make them for a 1 way trip?”
From an engineering point of view, redundancies, shielding, and accessories take up double or triple the volume of space for the actual engine. Reducing the requirement to, "It needs to work only once and only for x amount of time with no people around it." means the engineers have just been taken off of the leash. And the real question becomes, what payload and what speed? Do you want an FTL RPG so you can snipe components of an enemy ship, or do you want an FTL slug the size of a small asteroid to crack an enemy planet from 2 sectors over.
@@thomasschulz2167 a well aimed block of C4 right inside their engine core would likely cause a chain reaction within the core at bare minimum would cripple the ship
It’s basically carrying a bunch of unprotected miniature star generators with you inside a protected shell and then as soon as you get them out of your shell having them be somewhere else instantly and generate the star as soon as something touches it.
Is there maximum size of the field we can make? What happens if an object is partially in the field? How fast can you jump after first jump?
@@dumnor do not think abaut this Please
If their military doctrine is THAT stagnant across the board, imagine the field day a decent electronic warfare suot could have...
Or anyone with a computer 😂
that still only fall into 'distraction' categories as it sounds like a lot of those battleships designs mechanics is 'manual' in nature..
Imagen the field day a hybrid battleship carrier replacing half its missile compliment with factories and drones swarms have... delivering themselfs right to the hull of a foe and then fusing themselfs with it and starting to consume the ship itself to make more combat drones that at first crawl over its hide.. then inside
or one with dedicated long range rail kinetics capable of tactical strikes ,just as much like devastating 'short range' broad field ones ..no need for expensive materials for missiles ftl drives , find any astroid and carve out a few thousand 'dumb' munitions if need be ,after all ..might not be ftl speed but enough motion energy and a laser melting it just add thermal energy to the incoming round
@@Amoth_oth_ras_shash I'm not sure there's much indicating it's more mechanical that computerised but even so EW can include false emissions to effect sensors as well, imagine a fleet of essentially invisible battleships or something that looks like a civilian ship and is suddenly a warship. I suspect any civilisation with sufficiently well developed technology to have FTL has some form of computing running things like power generation and life support.
Alien: tallyhoo lads, we going to war
Humans: *war crime ensues*
Aliens:.. I didn't mean like that, but I'm not angry either
Alien ally: we are losing
humans: we have arrived to help you
Alien ally: we are still losing
humans: *commit a rather major action that goes against the rules*
Alien ally: ... well since we started this war we might as well end ALL of them
I'm pretty sure if they had told humans we couldn't do it or it couldn't be done that we would have dedicated entire research groups to getting it done.
Venusian colony, "telling them something is impossible only makes them wack the problem till a benefit appears."
Any other parts to this? Sounds like it could be good!
czcams.com/video/KSFWaVpfxDs/video.html
He did say we were new so he probably hasn't had enough contact with us to know that.
@@nightmarereaper5601 Or telling them "You Can't do that, not allowed!" Would have just gotten either the 3-year old's reaction "I'll just wait until Mommy/Daddy isn't watching" or the teenager reaction "You can't tell me what I can't do, I'll show you. Just you wait and See!"
"Oh. Oh we have this, and in a few galactic minutes everyone will.
..."
"Purge. Purge now. PURGE, NOW!"
I love that the aliens see this as a chance to finally free the galaxy from oppression, they'll get along well with humans I suspect.
Several lifetimes ago, my sister had a poster in her college dorm room showing a cartoon dog happily sitting high above the ground on the branch of a large tree. Below the picture, in large letters: "It's amazing what you can achieve when you don't know what you can't do."
I’ve seen that message many times, usually under images of cows or horses on rooftops.
Or a dog on a roof that'd make you scream: *_"Greg, WTF are you doing? How did you get up there?!!"_*
The difference in attitude.
The old method was to fight a battle not to lose, whereas the Humans winning the battle was all that mattered.
Correction: fighting the battle so the enemy loses.
@catish3692
The old method emphasised rules that had acceptable losses so one would not lose face.
The humans entered the fray with the attitude that winning was the most important thing. How one achieved that end did not matter. The current rules didn't apply because they weren't subject to them.
You know, I was expecting a bomb pumped laser or a casaba howitzer to reduce the effectiveness of point defense, but the FTL Drive itself being the weapon is even better!
I expected some sort of atomic weapon
I mean a bomb detonating in space only emits light and particle radiation which even if focused into a laser that's firing from closer with more energy than a ship mount can is still going to be severely weakened by highly reflective armor. A missile going low fractions of c while devastating are easily intercepted by lasers, a missile going high fractions of c are way too expensive to make or bulky to get up to speed quickly/correct course of given tracking is STL still. So the only useful tech for a missile under these circumstances is a FTL missile.
I was expecting a missile armored with the same armor their battleships used, except completely enclosed.
I wonder what chafe warheads would do to their lasers
Stealth torpedo boats.
no one told them they couldn't do it...
and this happened...
imagine if someone HAD told them they couldn't do it... what would they have created... something bigger? more destructive? something more status quo threatening?
never tell humanity that they can't or mustn't do something... they will always do it out of spite or curiosity...
The fate of humanity in the balance and being told munitions can't have FTL? Well then, prepare for ramming speed.
The obliterator from Endless Space 2 comes to mind.
*GarmrsBarking*
Tell a human something is forbidden , he'll either ignore the prohibition , or find a way around it.
I initially been thinking about Nuke-powered Laser arrays, or after a FLASH about a thermonuclear explosion, but FTL ramming-missile is even more FUN
Not just weapons either !
The old "War tactics in the Galactic Community is older than cast iron cannons" shtick. And now they've ruined space warfare for EVERYONE.
Geneva Conventions? More like Geneva Suggestions.
@@marclytle644 I sense space Canadians here....
@@marclytle644Geneva is on Earth. They weren't on Earth. They aren't called the Space War Conventions. They only apply inside the outer border of Earth's atmosphere.
Yeah, these are the HFY stories that make me sad for the genre. Much better are the 'what do you mean you can survive freezing temperatures and intentionally cultivated a poisonous plant to be MORE poisonous as a recreational food item?'
@@colinsmith1495 gimmie stories
Humans given advanced alien tech and instructions? Lol, we'd be using our twisted little minds to adapt that stuff in ways we only dream of now.
Monke throw ROCK. FAST.
"Tis better to beg forgiveness than to plead for permission" .. sometimes you do a thing for the simple reason that it NEEDS doing.
Never a war crime the 1st time
"Humanity, you can NOT use missiles."
"Those arnt missiles, those are rods with exposives inside going faster than light."
Those aren't missiles. They're recon drones. Very aggresstive recon drones that do what we call "recon in force",
@@noppornwongrassamee8941
Sure, they only work once, and the only data we get from them is a boom, but different types of booms help ypu identify different things
Joke or not, we just showed them that it's an important distinction.
very creative house names not at all similar to other content,
House Harken - House Harkonnen
House Treid - House Atreides
Love ur vids btw, keep it up
With so much that has come before, it is not surprising that there is some overlap with similar names.
@@marclytle644 I’m not saying it’s bad, but that’s definitely not a coincidence
I had another screen open after I began playing and had to switch back to make sure I wasn't mishearing that Dune houses.
@@marclytle644 It is deliberately and thinly veiled on purpose.
@@zotaninoron3548 ye exactly, nice reference tho I’m a massive dune fan
Ah those crazy humans throwing rocks in a game of laser tag again...
Heh... Rocks. Why is that rock going so fast? Wait... WHY DOES THE ROCK HAVE EXPLOSIVES IN IT?!?!?
It was a big rock!
( and pretty fast)
Reminds me of a true story about a math equation left on the blackboard. A student arrived late to class, and missed the part where the prof said this was an 'impossible equation and could not be solved'.
No one bothered to tell him this.
Guess what happened?
E=mc^2
You would be amazed at what humans can do if no limits are around. For good, bad, or stupid it will probably be quite a sight.
I remember I watched that video before. He literally thought it was a weekend assignment and was shitting bricks trying to get it completed, lol. When the hire ups approached, he thought he was busted for good after all the times for slacking off. Instead he got rewarded with the highest honor or something like that.
Telling them they couldn't do would have just made them do it to prove that they COULD.
Human see rock, Human throw rock
Animal see rock, animal ignore rock
Human see asteroid, Human throw asteroid
Human has ftl, Human use ftl
Specifically to throw rock faster
We need a backstory and a couple hundred episodes taking this too. It’s very dramatic end.
I can't be the only one to hear "Missle Launch detected! (Dune, the ORIGINAL RTS)" Heard by the enemy commander who scoffed only to be blown up to bit the next nanosecond after. 🤣
And yeah, Harkonen, Artreides and Freemen FTW!
given that the sensors seems to work by light speed, I don't think the enemy could even see the launch until after the missile hit
For me it's Supreme Commander's "strategic launch detected" in that unsettlingly robotic voice. Especially when hearing it over and over again.
Lol its not a war crime if it's done the first time.
I say the humans didn't get creative enough. Imagine the Oerlikon Ahead system increased in size, traveling at the speed of light decimating entire fleet formations.
Ok, who invited the crazy rock throwing murder monkeys?
"Missiles can easily be taken out with lasers"
"Mirrored shells are a great way to protect from lasers until the enemy maneuvers around your back side"
Make missiles with reflective surfaces so they can't be taken out by lasers, fast enough that other point defenses are unreliable.
If you're really aggressive, give the missiles simple AI, their own laser turrets (or others), ECW suits, etc. Basically combat drones.
FTL Metal Spike sounds overkill, and likely VERY expensive. The fact the galaxy hadn't even gotten to the above yet shows humanity will walk all over this class system.
If they said it couldn't be done we'd have just made it 5x bigger, and painted something obscene on the side to really stick it to 'em.
An alternate Dune universe, yes about time. Love FTL missiles.
Pretty sure if they *_did_* tell the humans they couldn't do it, those FTL missiles wouldn't even have needed a ship to launch from
This needs to be a series
THATS AGAINST THE RULES!?!
Wait...there were rules?!
50 precursor episodes, 200 post episode. This is a story to be told.
>Geneva convention?
>More like Geneva Checklist
OUCH! An FTL rod from god. What a way to win the day.
"You can't do that"
"Hold my beer"
And as every human expected he did it…
I love all the references to other Sci-fi works. Uplift, House this & that from Dune. It is fun getting the references.
Humans flinging a projectile using FTL drives are terrifying since it is beyond Light Speed and probably and likely cause terrible mass destruction than splitting atoms.
I was expecting the good old human method of pure unadulterated beyond overwhelming stupid levels of firepower, blot out the stars with missiles sorta level.
Strapping an FTL engine to a nuke also works.
Nuke is a firecracker compared to a can of beer at light speed.
I always suffer the "science" on SF movies.
Martian: You can DUCT TAPE the door, about 7' in diameter and there is near vacuum on the other side. There is some 3m2 surface that gives us THIRTY metric tons of pressure. SOME TAPE !!!!
Telling the humans they couldn't do it would only have lead to faster demonstrations of it being done.
Pretty hard to be convicted of breaking a rule that you were never taught to obey!
Democrats are trying to make that possible.
One of many examples are the prosecutors Jack Smith, Fanni Willis and Alvin Bragg.
Aww, when he said the Human ships had tubes I thought they were Mass Accelerators. Bringing a gigantic gun to a laser fight.
That wouldn't have solved the problem, indeed it would have made it exponentially worse. The ships were at several light-seconds of distance from each other, meaning laser weapons take several seconds between firing and reaching their target (laser beams travel at the speed of light). Hence the doctrine of predicting enemy movement patterns and firing where they're expected to be.
Mass accelerator slugs would at best move at a fraction of that speed, so instead of seconds, you'd have to account for hours, or at best minutes depending on how advanced the guns are. Current day railguns can achieve muzzle velocities around 2500 m/s, which means that the projectile would require over 33 hours to cross a distance of one light-second.
@@lemax6865 So, depending on the kind of Mass Acceleration we're using here, it may not be that much of a disadvantage. Let's go with everyone's favorite form, Halo's MACs. Those systems, at highest charge is said to propel 3,000 ton depleted uranium slugs up to "point four tenths" the speed of light. There's a bit of contention with that what's supposed to mean, as that translates to 0.4, or 40%. A bullet traveling at nearly half the speed of light would be pretty incredible, as that's nearly 120 million meters per second.
@@MikMoen That would still more than double the travel time over lasers, so even with mass accelerators that ridiculously powerful, it doesn't solve the problem. It makes it worse. That's without even going through what happens with mass going that fast, general relativity being a thing.
Technically, they did accelerate mass. It just so happened that that mass was in the form of a missile. And that it was accelerated faster than the speed of light. But mass was in fact still accelerated
Ah yes, the ancient human tradition of accelerating objects to hit a target at distance, also known as the Art of YEET! By hand, with bows, spears, gunpowder, rocket propelling, and now FTL engines.
The more humans change, the more we stay the same. Unga bunga!
Only a human would strap an ftl drive to a missile and throw it to an enemy
The entertaining thing is everyone is looking at the missile, while ignoring the truly serious change.
You see, even the US... and even the CCP and the old soviet forces... avoid targeting civilian leaders and admirals. If they had been told that the dreadnaut would be the command ship, the humans never would have engaged it.
1 minute I am faster than the topic of the story (does this count as a spoiler?)
10 bucks says they gave ftl tech to a mad engineer in Florida and budget of multi planetary taxes to make it into whatever nightmare of the void they could think of
Oh going to light speed and tearing a ship apart - where have I seen that one before…
I honestly believed this was going to be a case of, “no one told us that was a space war crime!”
The alien commander accidently asked that famous question "What could possibly go wrong?"
Everybody all big and bad til you teleport a nuke onto their bridge.
They didn't teleport nukes. They stuck an FTL drive behind a tungsten slug. Just impacting something at close to relativistic speed would create a nuclear explosion whose size would be determined by the mass of the colliding objects. I don't know how to calculate what happens when two objects with mass collide at super-relativistic speeds. I'm pretty sure the first missile should have totally obliterated more than just the dreadnought.
0:19 *blink* I can tell whoever wrote this had some inspiration from Dune.
Ditto. So so close.
Never tell a human they can't do something. They will always do it out of spite or curiosity.
Never tell a human they shouldn't do something. They will always do it just to prove a point.
Basically, never tell humans anything. Just hope that they don't stumble upon something dangerous and poke it with a stick one too many times. Or worse, figure out how to poke you with it.
«And they had done it because everyone forgot to tell them the couldn't do it» ? No luck, pall. If someone HAD told them that they couldn't do it, the Humans would have done it even faster.
House Harken is Dune's House Harkonnen.
House Traid is Dune's House Atreides.
The Spice Must Flow.
With new names
The Beer Must Flow
Please hold
"Harkin", "Traid", I saw what you did there. :P
I like this one, its more realistic than most in term of space battle (not talking about the battle tradition part of course)
Just tell the humans to fire at will 😂
FTL missiles! Niiiice!!
Overkill is something humans tend to do 😂
Pop pop pop, watching xenos drop
I smell the stench of Dune upon this one… also of that gawd awful Holdo maneuver.
Dude chill it's a nuke strapped to FTL not some purple haired lesbian "Admiral" in a frilly dress losing here entire battlegroup only to fuck up abandoning the rest of her forces....Yeah I agree that shit sucks.
Uhm... I don't think tese aliens really grasp what humanity is capeable of. Wen you tell somebody that he cannot do something, the usual answer is: Chellange accepted.
It's like the old: You can visit any room in the castle exept, oh god no get out there!
In my neck of the woods when you tell somebody that he cannot do something, the usual answer is: "Here, Hold My Beer". 🙂
Yeah, they screwed up. Never build a weapon that can't be defended against. Especially one that everyone else has the tech to build. Welcome to MAD 2.0, but this time nobody has been trained on how not to shoot everything in sight.
The missiles must flow
Thank you for the reading
Dude , you re dreaming ! Your whole empire is dead. The humans created that, with only FTL. Once they get some advanced tech , you're all history footnotes.
There's a chance that Humanity will work well with them because they gave us a lot of freedom and leeway at the start and could expand that philosophy across the galaxy and leave the humans to just chill out and invent new kinds of horrors beyond comprehension just in case.
While listening I initially kept thinking this was right out of Frank Herbert’s Dune series. The names were similar enough so could not easily break from this idea until mentioning the arrival of humans.
I love stories like this... This was so good XD
It is what people don't say that usually gets them into trouble :D
Never tell humans THAT they can’t, that just guarantees we’ll atleast try to do it. Tell us WHY we can’t and you’ll probably get better results.
I think that qualifies as a oopsie!
So the brought the rods of god into space warfare? Nice.
viva la revolución
I feel Dune vibes and insparation
Should have told the humans, that what they just did was basically a galactic war crime.
He didn't seem like he particularly cared... Indeed, his reaction was more like "Oh cool, war crimes! More of those! More of that exact war crime across a galactic scale!" Besides, most war crimes are considered bad because they create suffering unnecessary to the accomplishment of wartime goals, or so disproportionate to said goals that it's unjustifiable. This war crime is only a crime because the Nobles would be the ones getting shafted.
FTL means physical munitions are still a viable option to energy weapons in space
The missile had been launched from UNS Guillotine
Yeah, even if they were told they couldn't do it, they would have done it anyway.
Someone shortened House Atreides and Harkonen.
Just wait for Paul Muadib to turn up, the spice awakens.....
What’s the bet they were nuclear?
Probably lanthanide or aktinide penetrator because they have a high density and hey some may even compress enough for boom
When your hitting something at worthwhile FTL speeds (a few hundred times light speed, if not a few hundred thousand, anything slower would make interstellar empires not worth having) everything is nuclear, you start to get all kinds of fun new radiation. You could litterally throw a sandwich at them at these speeds and it would have enough energy to make the largest nuclear weapons look like toys.
clearly the writer found some inspiration in the works of the late great F. Herbert.
Next target..,
No never negates nothing!
House Harken? House Traid? Dune reference, much?
Dune vibes for the names lol
Harkonan and Atredes?
Why would have noone thought about superluminal weapons
Ngl, it's kinda common sense
Uhhhh... telling humans they couldn't do something would have guaranteed that they did it.
Amarr Titan.
It's literally Stellaris in a nutshell.
FTL railgun?
We all know us humans would have still done it even if we were told not to do it. Fuck tradition win fight to win.
So we invented yet anothe war crime. Sorry!
Sounds very much like the author enjoyed Dune series
mm ,sweet little complacent galatic empires...
time to wake up , the only asset you have that these new little cute monsters cant copy or improve is industry and hehehe.... every moment they are closing that gap ^^
Someone likes Dune
To Summarize...
Alien Fleet leader is losing and lamenting the stupidity of their political system.
Human ally reinforcements show up and say "Hold my beer"
Half enemy fleet disintegrates
Alien Fleet commander... "Huh... neat. Welp, I guess I am in chare now"