I DO NOT WANT to date people who are irresponsible with money. You ain't gotta be rich, you DEFINITELY dont have to make 6 figures, but you do have to know the difference between needs and wants, and you have to be able to manage the two. I'm not your mom, I'm not gonna raise you. Get your $hit together before you date.
My wife is an Accountant, it’s one of the first discussions we had. Frank discussions about money are key , not just how much you make, but saving habits, investing habits,and retirement goals . If your potential partner giggles or says I don’t do any of that , run for your damn life. Don’t get wrapped up with someone just because they make more than you. Their money habits could suck and they will take you down the tubes with them . The last thing you need is someone who can spend money faster than you make it. It’s ok to be picky and ruthless.
Definitely especially in life long commitments. It's literally the most important investment you'll make in your life. Who you chose to marry and have kids with. So you best make sure you align on all the important fronts. Values, principles, physical attraction, sexual compatibility, sense of humor, similar interests, emotional intelligence, financial literacy and responsibility, no extreme trauma from past (sexual abuse, rape, emotional neglect), no family history of mental health issues or certain other diseases like cancers and diabetes etc All these things need to be vetted extensively before committing to marriage imo.
@@nostalgicbliss5547 100% agree . Sometimes it can feel like looking for a needle in a haystack but it’s worth the effort . There are good people out there doing the right things .most of the time those people aren’t on dating websites , they are busy running a successful and fulfilling life.
Most people do not and will never have enough money to do investing. There are different kinds of ways to demonstrate you’re responsible with money than having “retirement goals.”
Just want to say that having a plan, and being financially responsible is NOT the same as being financially stable. You can be very responsible with your money, but still be struggling. Sometimes you can't control your income or financial situation as much as you would like. And these people, the ones that are responsible but are being dealt a hard hand, deserve love too.
Yeah I use the term financially literate. I feel that encompasses people that are responsible, know how to budget, and are going to be good at managing any future money.
@@EM-fw4dr definitely. There's a difference between being dealt a bad hand, whether it be being laid off from your job, reduced hours, people just not hiring, a car accident, natural disaster, etc. and just being financially reckless and spending money on shit you don't need.
Lack of financial literacy is a deal breaker for me. Stability is the icing but just knowing how to manage and budget and fulfill your responsibilities is enough.
Let ppl do what they want. They will learn. I know several 'money doesn't matter' women who played Betty the builder with adult men and are STILL struggling to build with them years later.
My first thought was "Me and my boyfriend started dating when I was a student and obviously I had no real financial stability yet(though I worked as a tutor and made some money but I can't call it a stable income, you know, long summer holidays, kids get sick, have something urgent and cancel...) But despite that, in our country people have it imprinted in their brains that you always should put some money aside, have a safety pillow just in case. And it's not out of any sort of financial literacy, but more out of historic fear of not being paid your salary for months, cause that's the way our grandparents had it. They had tough times so they teach us to be well prepared for the worst and I guess it is so for every family in our country.
Some women walk around here with an invisible tool belt and their heart on their sleeve, and then they wonder why none of their relationships work out.
If she’s pretty they will. She should spend all her money on her looks and clothes. She’ll find a rich man in no time. Men don’t care if you’re a brokie. They care if you’re hot, and fun are intelligent, or at least willing to learn. But mostly if you’re hot 😂 AND you know your role and how to take care of the man who’s taking care of you. Facts.
Me and my partner just have separate finances besides the few basic things that we both use (house, cars, leisure). We have different ideals regarding what is worth spending on, and so we only share what we agree on. Everything else is separate, which makes it much easier to deal with our differences.
That was the first conversation we had before we even started dating let alone get engaged. We did it in an arranged marriage settings because we knew how much our families will get entwined if don’t have our shit together
I dont give a crap how much you make if you marry somone who spends like its going out of style you wont ever amount to much. Choose your wife choose your life.
Lol just because you are married doesn't mean you have to give your wife free reign to spend your money. I have had at least 1 situation which was difficult but I ended up saying no to my wife spending my money on something that I didn't agree with.
Thanks for another great video, BFF! I wish life skills like financial literacy was included in school curriculum. It's a must-have skill to being a good adult, IMO.
I like the idea of willingly supporting people in their dark times, but definitely with the catch of being able to leave freely if it endangers you. It's like the guide to saving a drowning person: swim out to them with a floatation device, and yes if they try to instinctually drag you under to get air, you do have to kick them off and re-establish the support in a sustainable way. Under enough pressure our sense of safety narrows until it's just ourselves, and support can bring someone else down if the threat is heavy enough. Address the threat and help them sustain their safety habits, but don't endanger yourself to save people.
She literally just said she doesn't mean rich. Money and love may be different, but love isn't going to pay for your kids to have a good life once they're grown and on their own. Love can't pay for you to survive. And it damn well isn't going to keep you safe when your partner is a gambling addict or a fool. You want a partner, not a baby.
Every single married couple I know that has issues, has financial issues. No "yours mine and ours" , one person makes the money and has a job the other doesn't, inconsistent priorities and spending on unnecessary things while also complaining that they cant afford things they wish the could have. As an outside I can see the big reg flag issues. But not my monkey not my zoo.
Yes, this!! I was dating a guy who I witnessed make questionable financial decisions on small levels, like buying a new phone when current one was working fine, always having to get a soda when ordering food, buying multiple small packs of oreos from the gas station instead of a big pack from the grocery store WHILE job hunting. Then came the big ones- saw him lose his car and get evicted within a year of dating. Of course I was the bad guy when we broke up because his poor decisions stressed me the eff outta there.
Keep preaching it!!! The more people saying it the more people it will reach. There is an in-between and its perfectly fine to not marry the highest dollar maker you can find. Financial stability and work ethic to keep it, is whats important.
Choose a partner based on character, honesty, and compatibility, not net worth. Keep your finances separate and don't try to raise or change another adult. Just pay your way and contribute to shared expenses equally. And get a prenup! Clarity instead of wishful thinking is the way to go.
Why must finances be excluded when choosing a partner? People get so touchy about money but it's important in a relationship whether people want to admit it or not. Fiscal responsibility and earning power can definitely be considered right alongside character and other attributes
I’ve been quoted as saying I wouldn’t date a poor man and everyone got all mad at me. I have no intention of not being upper middle class. It’s just straight like that. I do date a lot of doctors. I like that they are on call… not all the time but it breaks things up
damn i just got attacked and i was planning on showing my bf this xD. Im kidding i am the unstable one but i am trying to set myself up with a more stable job to maybe lead into a career, and i'm finding things i can maybe put small chunks of money into investment wise to start with my bank so when i'm a little more grounded i have that to work with. Edit: at least so far i don't have debt xD
This is the biggest mistake I've ever made. I married a man-child who put 100K us in debt. Divorce only leaves me responsible for it. He doesn't make money or pay the bills. Definitely, lesson learned.
The Absolute Best Advice Ever. We generally learn this as we age . Cannot express the importance of this . Be same yoked to turn a biblical phrase. Dont make you life unduly hard by being with someone who thinks about finances differently than you. Listen to our RBFF 👍💚
Lol I started dating my husband in high school. I told him "I want a house someday so you're getting a credit card" 😂 here we are 15 years later, 2 houses later and near perfect credit 😊
@@technolus5742 it affects you anyway. Family bills, budgeting, the house purchase. And pre-nup is not some set in stone contract, changes in life circumstances can override pre-existing agreement. But anyway. If you want to complicate an already difficult life, be my (actually, another person's) guest 👍
@@user-qo8om3zt3g A prenuptial can hardly be changed unless both parties agree, or one party breaks the terms (if there are such terms that can be broken in your prenup). I personally can't see myself being apart from the most captivating, loyal, and genuinely good person that I have ever met over our different notions of what constitutes good or disciplined spending. A few shared expenses are automatically paid, other than that our finances are completely separate. It is only my business if she wants to spend my money or I hers, in which case it requires both of our approval so there is no unexpected withdrawal of eachothers money. Other than one time having had a tough time emotionally finding myself having to say "no" to my wife's request, there have been 0 problems. Filtering relationships based on a financial perspective is maybe a bit too dystopian for me.
This is important because many people go through life not having any financial literary skills and constantly putting themselves and their SO and family in compromising situations on a daily basis. I also love the CUPID music in the background!!
After almost 30 years of marriage I completely agree that you need to talk and agree with your partner about certain things in the marriage before you say I do. Decide how money will be handled and financial goals. Decide if and how many kids you will have along with how they will be raised. Those 2 things can break any marriage really easily. And remember no marriage is perfect or easy. It’s like everything else worth having in life, it takes work!
Learned this recently. Finally dated a guy for a bit after many years of being invisible. Sadly he is about as bad as one can be financially. We discussed finance somewhat early, but he lied through his teeth. He refuses to work, debt to his eyeballs, and spends on wants before needs. It's a mess. Finance will be one of the first topics if I ever am lucky enough to go on another date.
I'm afraid in Germany it's not common to talk about your finances. With my friends I openly talk how much I make, but I am alone in this topic, none of my friends disclose their earnings. It seems in Germany people openly talk about their sexual preferences with friends but money is a no go. That's so strange. So I see all those people with nice cars, big apartments, traveling the world 2-3 times a year and I am wondering if they're really good with money (high paying job, good investments,...) or really bad with money (dept,...). I even know couples who don't know about the finances of their siginificant other, even after years of relationship. That just baffles me.
In life a person might face hardships financially or physically. People who are quoted as financially unstable could be one of those. Never give up on your dreams.
This is excellent advice. 👌👌👌 Also, question for you... If *someone* just survived an 8 year divorce from a narcissist who was financially abusive and stopped paying for the house, etc., while the other person racked up $250k in legal bills to gain full custody of their only child whom he had been abusing...and that someone now wants to date without scaring people with the truth of the legal bill, do you think that *someone* should declare bankruptcy or start a lifetime legal bill payment plan? *asking for a friend* 😉
There are two things you need to find out before you go in a long term relationship. Do they want children or not: Simply because you shouldnt force them on someone or be forced to not have them. How are the finances and how do they deal: In the eyes of the state a marriage is also a financial union. Find out if you would need to take over debt
I think thats my problem to im overloaded with stuff to fix including myself an alot of female in debt fincianally emotionally or just unrealistic i love building i hate fixing
this is dumb.... you can help fix someones habits there just needs to be communication going by this logic i would not have my bro-inlaw and 2 nephews and niece bro-inlaw was not brought up understanding money/responsibilities --- still hard-working, kind, generous, faithful -- just didn't know how to handle money well sis almost called off wedding when stuff became apparent (they dated all through college) ... after talking to me she made him talk to me and go over his finances / he did it complained a bit to me and i just told him my sis had some money issues and i helped her, so she wants you to talk to me and I would recommend talking to your dad as well as its good to get both accounts his dad agreed with me after going over his spending habits as well, it was talked about, addressed, and everything turned out well in the end.... sometimes people need help when addressing issues/shortcomings
Some men don't want to change. My last boyfriend was comfortable living off a jack in the box pay check. Im glad we did me the favor and broke up with me.
My boyfriend broke 2 days after payday and said I don't want to buy valentines present on case we get in difficulty im in ill health im considering walking and returning what I bought him for valentines. I thought it was drink or someone else but he's horrible.
Financial literacy and responsibility are WAYYY more important than simply having money, money will not impress me but rather how good you are with the money you have! I would date the man who works at a damn retail store in a heart beat if he knew how to work WITH his money, save, invest, and spend wisely and budget vs the dumba** who has thousands and thousands but always in the negatives HELL NO! It's deeper than simply having money! In these economic times it's crazy that some of y'all would judge someone for having some debt! Did y'all forget school loans exist? It's not about having debt it's about how you are managing that debt!
My father earns more than my mother but is a very selfish man: he ones spend my mothers money on bowling balls and mom needs to OT to pay for rent. He’s got very poor credit and made a lot of poor financial decisions. He is a very poor provider. Made me learn that having someone with higher income than you doesn’t mean you’ll be ok. Spending habits, goals in careers, work ethic, and financial plans should be talked about by both parties. It’s not gold digging, it’s building wealth.
😶 have a plan but keep ending up in the hospital and missing work and messing up my finances…… guess I am screwed rich BFF. Might as well hide under a rock.
I DO NOT WANT to date people who are irresponsible with money.
You ain't gotta be rich, you DEFINITELY dont have to make 6 figures, but you do have to know the difference between needs and wants, and you have to be able to manage the two.
I'm not your mom, I'm not gonna raise you. Get your $hit together before you date.
Well said
Lol😂😂😂😂 please
@@Melvin-cd1oy Please, what?! 🤷♀️ Are you telling me I don't know what I want in a relationship?!
@@southsider9638 yep 👍 💯 you are delusional 😂😂😂
@@Melvin-cd1oy how would you know what a relationship even is, Incel?
My wife is an Accountant, it’s one of the first discussions we had. Frank discussions about money are key , not just how much you make, but saving habits, investing habits,and retirement goals . If your potential partner giggles or says I don’t do any of that , run for your damn life. Don’t get wrapped up with someone just because they make more than you. Their money habits could suck and they will take you down the tubes with them . The last thing you need is someone who can spend money faster than you make it. It’s ok to be picky and ruthless.
Definitely especially in life long commitments. It's literally the most important investment you'll make in your life. Who you chose to marry and have kids with. So you best make sure you align on all the important fronts. Values, principles, physical attraction, sexual compatibility, sense of humor, similar interests, emotional intelligence, financial literacy and responsibility, no extreme trauma from past (sexual abuse, rape, emotional neglect), no family history of mental health issues or certain other diseases like cancers and diabetes etc All these things need to be vetted extensively before committing to marriage imo.
True. Instead buying crazy bag or clothes. If she say don’t invest the money. You’re in big trouble.
@@nostalgicbliss5547 100% agree . Sometimes it can feel like looking for a needle in a haystack but it’s worth the effort . There are good people out there doing the right things .most of the time those people aren’t on dating websites , they are busy running a successful and fulfilling life.
@@nostalgicbliss5547what if I have that history? So I'm not aloud to marry?
Most people do not and will never have enough money to do investing.
There are different kinds of ways to demonstrate you’re responsible with money than having “retirement goals.”
I demand the "Can we fix them? No we can't!" go viral cause oh my gosh this is a problem in so many ways.
Just want to say that having a plan, and being financially responsible is NOT the same as being financially stable. You can be very responsible with your money, but still be struggling. Sometimes you can't control your income or financial situation as much as you would like. And these people, the ones that are responsible but are being dealt a hard hand, deserve love too.
Yeah I use the term financially literate. I feel that encompasses people that are responsible, know how to budget, and are going to be good at managing any future money.
This is advice Vivian is from people who never struggled with money
Oh but you can control your financial decisions
Anyone can fall on hard times, but should definitely look out for people who are financially reckless.
@@EM-fw4dr definitely. There's a difference between being dealt a bad hand, whether it be being laid off from your job, reduced hours, people just not hiring, a car accident, natural disaster, etc. and just being financially reckless and spending money on shit you don't need.
Lack of financial literacy is a deal breaker for me. Stability is the icing but just knowing how to manage and budget and fulfill your responsibilities is enough.
thank you for this. we need to remember we can't fix a grow ass adult nor can we save an adult. The person needs to work and help her/himself.
Thank you!!! 👏👏👏
You know what’s the worst? You tell people these things and they get upset! That’s wild!
N they say women r gold diggers
It makes it easier to spot them and eliminate them from your options.
That's good cause now you know it won't be more than a short fling.
Let ppl do what they want. They will learn. I know several 'money doesn't matter' women who played Betty the builder with adult men and are STILL struggling to build with them years later.
The kissy face 😂😂😂😂
My first thought was "Me and my boyfriend started dating when I was a student and obviously I had no real financial stability yet(though I worked as a tutor and made some money but I can't call it a stable income, you know, long summer holidays, kids get sick, have something urgent and cancel...)
But despite that, in our country people have it imprinted in their brains that you always should put some money aside, have a safety pillow just in case. And it's not out of any sort of financial literacy, but more out of historic fear of not being paid your salary for months, cause that's the way our grandparents had it. They had tough times so they teach us to be well prepared for the worst and I guess it is so for every family in our country.
Some women walk around here with an invisible tool belt and their heart on their sleeve, and then they wonder why none of their relationships work out.
If only I could stop dating myself 😅
Definitely teaching my kiddos this. Financial Literacy is extremely important.
I keep telling the most financially irresponsible person I ever met that no millionaire men would ever want to date you.
If she’s pretty they will. She should spend all her money on her looks and clothes. She’ll find a rich man in no time. Men don’t care if you’re a brokie. They care if you’re hot, and fun are intelligent, or at least willing to learn. But mostly if you’re hot 😂 AND you know your role and how to take care of the man who’s taking care of you. Facts.
Me and my partner just have separate finances besides the few basic things that we both use (house, cars, leisure). We have different ideals regarding what is worth spending on, and so we only share what we agree on. Everything else is separate, which makes it much easier to deal with our differences.
That was the first conversation we had before we even started dating let alone get engaged. We did it in an arranged marriage settings because we knew how much our families will get entwined if don’t have our shit together
If you havent seen there credit score prior to engagement your wrong.
I dont give a crap how much you make if you marry somone who spends like its going out of style you wont ever amount to much.
Choose your wife choose your life.
Lol just because you are married doesn't mean you have to give your wife free reign to spend your money. I have had at least 1 situation which was difficult but I ended up saying no to my wife spending my money on something that I didn't agree with.
Thanks for another great video, BFF! I wish life skills like financial literacy was included in school curriculum. It's a must-have skill to being a good adult, IMO.
In this day and age I can't imagine someone getting married before having these kinds of conversations!
So true RichBFF. I had a divorce, he didn't pay his half of the rent but paid for his friends drinks at bars.
I like the idea of willingly supporting people in their dark times, but definitely with the catch of being able to leave freely if it endangers you. It's like the guide to saving a drowning person: swim out to them with a floatation device, and yes if they try to instinctually drag you under to get air, you do have to kick them off and re-establish the support in a sustainable way.
Under enough pressure our sense of safety narrows until it's just ourselves, and support can bring someone else down if the threat is heavy enough. Address the threat and help them sustain their safety habits, but don't endanger yourself to save people.
Ugh, you broke my heart VIv. That Schmuck you’re with might be rich but money and love are two different things.
She literally just said she doesn't mean rich. Money and love may be different, but love isn't going to pay for your kids to have a good life once they're grown and on their own. Love can't pay for you to survive. And it damn well isn't going to keep you safe when your partner is a gambling addict or a fool. You want a partner, not a baby.
Love doesn’t pay the bills
I kept trying to fix someone. (gambling, cheating etc)
I finally realized I had to fix myself.
CAN WE FIX THEM?
leave their a$$ ALONE !!
Every single married couple I know that has issues, has financial issues. No "yours mine and ours" , one person makes the money and has a job the other doesn't, inconsistent priorities and spending on unnecessary things while also complaining that they cant afford things they wish the could have. As an outside I can see the big reg flag issues. But not my monkey not my zoo.
Yes, this!! I was dating a guy who I witnessed make questionable financial decisions on small levels, like buying a new phone when current one was working fine, always having to get a soda when ordering food, buying multiple small packs of oreos from the gas station instead of a big pack from the grocery store WHILE job hunting. Then came the big ones- saw him lose his car and get evicted within a year of dating. Of course I was the bad guy when we broke up because his poor decisions stressed me the eff outta there.
And this Is why I stay single..
It ain't about the love anymore
Hahaha
I loved the Bob the Builder reference and the throw a kiss to Bill Gates. Well said, Rich BFF.
I used to shop at goodwill. They went up on prices. Now I shop at estate sales and temu.
Keep preaching it!!! The more people saying it the more people it will reach. There is an in-between and its perfectly fine to not marry the highest dollar maker you can find. Financial stability and work ethic to keep it, is whats important.
Thank you!!! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Choose a partner based on character, honesty, and compatibility, not net worth. Keep your finances separate and don't try to raise or change another adult. Just pay your way and contribute to shared expenses equally. And get a prenup! Clarity instead of wishful thinking is the way to go.
Why must finances be excluded when choosing a partner? People get so touchy about money but it's important in a relationship whether people want to admit it or not. Fiscal responsibility and earning power can definitely be considered right alongside character and other attributes
I got so lucky with my husband. We both have the same goals.
Amen!!! Say again so the people in the back can hear you.
I’ve been quoted as saying I wouldn’t date a poor man and everyone got all mad at me.
I have no intention of not being upper middle class. It’s just straight like that. I do date a lot of doctors. I like that they are on call… not all the time but it breaks things up
damn i just got attacked and i was planning on showing my bf this xD.
Im kidding i am the unstable one but i am trying to set myself up with a more stable job to maybe lead into a career, and i'm finding things i can maybe put small chunks of money into investment wise to start with my bank so when i'm a little more grounded i have that to work with.
Edit: at least so far i don't have debt xD
twice burned. Lesson learned. Thanks for the reminder, Viv.
I'm agreeing with ALL OF THIS... MY broke @$$ husband LOVES to SPEND MONEY....
Agreed. It’s the difficult conversations that make all the difference.
This is the biggest mistake I've ever made. I married a man-child who put 100K us in debt. Divorce only leaves me responsible for it. He doesn't make money or pay the bills. Definitely, lesson learned.
The Absolute Best Advice Ever. We generally learn this as we age . Cannot express the importance of this . Be same yoked to turn a biblical phrase. Dont make you life unduly hard by being with someone who thinks about finances differently than you.
Listen to our RBFF 👍💚
Thank you so very much for sharing this, I really wish I would have seen it ten years ago but am so glad others will benefit from it now.
Lol I started dating my husband in high school. I told him "I want a house someday so you're getting a credit card" 😂 here we are 15 years later, 2 houses later and near perfect credit 😊
Realest shyt ever 💯
My debt, my problem. Your debt, YOUR problem.
@@nitaes2372 prenuptial?
And who is going to pay for bills if you have debt? How would the credit score look if one of the partners has a debt?
@@user-qo8om3zt3g Prenuptial. You do not have to be responsible for your partner's debts.
@@technolus5742 it affects you anyway. Family bills, budgeting, the house purchase. And pre-nup is not some set in stone contract, changes in life circumstances can override pre-existing agreement.
But anyway. If you want to complicate an already difficult life, be my (actually, another person's) guest 👍
@@user-qo8om3zt3g A prenuptial can hardly be changed unless both parties agree, or one party breaks the terms (if there are such terms that can be broken in your prenup).
I personally can't see myself being apart from the most captivating, loyal, and genuinely good person that I have ever met over our different notions of what constitutes good or disciplined spending. A few shared expenses are automatically paid, other than that our finances are completely separate. It is only my business if she wants to spend my money or I hers, in which case it requires both of our approval so there is no unexpected withdrawal of eachothers money.
Other than one time having had a tough time emotionally finding myself having to say "no" to my wife's request, there have been 0 problems. Filtering relationships based on a financial perspective is maybe a bit too dystopian for me.
I need to tell myself this on a weekly basis. DON’T DATE financially unstable and irresponsible guys!
Not every lasting marriage I know, started on the perfect financial situation of both people.
I really wish more women would pay attention to this. I’ve seen so many of them lose everything and then they can never get it back.
Testify girl!!!!✊🏽❤️
This is important because many people go through life not having any financial literary skills and constantly putting themselves and their SO and family in compromising situations on a daily basis. I also love the CUPID music in the background!!
Sprinkle sprinkle ✨✨
Embarassing
Hahahaha you’re so funny 😂 love your content ❤️
Translated: "Ladies, keep digging for gold and NEVER date a guy who makes less than you do! He's trash!"
PREACH!!! 👏👏👏👏
After almost 30 years of marriage I completely agree that you need to talk and agree with your partner about certain things in the marriage before you say I do. Decide how money will be handled and financial goals. Decide if and how many kids you will have along with how they will be raised. Those 2 things can break any marriage really easily. And remember no marriage is perfect or easy. It’s like everything else worth having in life, it takes work!
I love the kiss part.
Girl this is the TRUTH!!
my crushes financial goals align with mine, but he’s not available. drat!
That’s why when we Chinese dating we check your bank statements first lmao😂
I don’t date them, I married them. Granted she was pretty honest about how bad she was with money and we have system now
When your Bob the builder 💀
Havent seen a golddiger in a while thanks nice to see a massive one
Kissing Bill Gates cracked me up. 😂
Haha the little kiss 😙 your videos are both fun and helpful
Bob the builder took me out 😂😂
Preach!!!
Thankfully not legally bind but damn can’t allow someone to drag me into debt because they don’t have a handle on their money.
Learned this recently. Finally dated a guy for a bit after many years of being invisible. Sadly he is about as bad as one can be financially. We discussed finance somewhat early, but he lied through his teeth. He refuses to work, debt to his eyeballs, and spends on wants before needs. It's a mess. Finance will be one of the first topics if I ever am lucky enough to go on another date.
Preach sister!!! ✌️👍🏼👏👏👏
Well, guess me being an artist puts dating out of the question.
I'm afraid in Germany it's not common to talk about your finances. With my friends I openly talk how much I make, but I am alone in this topic, none of my friends disclose their earnings.
It seems in Germany people openly talk about their sexual preferences with friends but money is a no go. That's so strange.
So I see all those people with nice cars, big apartments, traveling the world 2-3 times a year and I am wondering if they're really good with money (high paying job, good investments,...) or really bad with money (dept,...).
I even know couples who don't know about the finances of their siginificant other, even after years of relationship.
That just baffles me.
Can we fix them? No we can't! Now that's a healthy dating mantra, frfr
I feel like financial conversations should happen at least around the time the engagement talk starts popping up, if not earlier
Exactly!! ❤
🗣️Tell ‘em Viv!
Janitors are not worthy of love!! you heard her!!
In life a person might face hardships financially or physically. People who are quoted as financially unstable could be one of those. Never give up on your dreams.
Money said I'm top 2 and I'm not 2. I'm number 1!! I'm number 1!! I'm number 1!!
This is excellent advice. 👌👌👌
Also, question for you...
If *someone* just survived an 8 year divorce from a narcissist who was financially abusive and stopped paying for the house, etc., while the other person racked up $250k in legal bills to gain full custody of their only child whom he had been abusing...and that someone now wants to date without scaring people with the truth of the legal bill, do you think that *someone* should declare bankruptcy or start a lifetime legal bill payment plan?
*asking for a friend* 😉
There are two things you need to find out before you go in a long term relationship.
Do they want children or not: Simply because you shouldnt force them on someone or be forced to not have them.
How are the finances and how do they deal: In the eyes of the state a marriage is also a financial union. Find out if you would need to take over debt
I think thats my problem to im overloaded with stuff to fix including myself an alot of female in debt fincianally emotionally or just unrealistic i love building i hate fixing
“I’m top 2 and I’m not 2” LMAO
those kisses are so wild
yes, spill the tea 🫖
this is dumb.... you can help fix someones habits there just needs to be communication
going by this logic i would not have my bro-inlaw and 2 nephews and niece
bro-inlaw was not brought up understanding money/responsibilities --- still hard-working, kind, generous, faithful -- just didn't know how to handle money well
sis almost called off wedding when stuff became apparent (they dated all through college) ... after talking to me she made him talk to me and go over his finances / he did it complained a bit to me and i just told him my sis had some money issues and i helped her, so she wants you to talk to me and I would recommend talking to your dad as well as its good to get both accounts
his dad agreed with me after going over his spending habits as well, it was talked about, addressed, and everything turned out well in the end....
sometimes people need help when addressing issues/shortcomings
Your family is lucky to have you.
People need to want to change for things to work out
Some men don't want to change.
My last boyfriend was comfortable living off a jack in the box pay check.
Im glad we did me the favor and broke up with me.
My boyfriend broke 2 days after payday and said I don't want to buy valentines present on case we get in difficulty im in ill health im considering walking and returning what I bought him for valentines. I thought it was drink or someone else but he's horrible.
Yes girl!
Financial literacy and responsibility are WAYYY more important than simply having money, money will not impress me but rather how good you are with the money you have! I would date the man who works at a damn retail store in a heart beat if he knew how to work WITH his money, save, invest, and spend wisely and budget vs the dumba** who has thousands and thousands but always in the negatives HELL NO! It's deeper than simply having money! In these economic times it's crazy that some of y'all would judge someone for having some debt! Did y'all forget school loans exist? It's not about having debt it's about how you are managing that debt!
Thanks
Also have to add that rich people can aslo be financially unstable
Big facts! 👏
My father earns more than my mother but is a very selfish man: he ones spend my mothers money on bowling balls and mom needs to OT to pay for rent. He’s got very poor credit and made a lot of poor financial decisions. He is a very poor provider. Made me learn that having someone with higher income than you doesn’t mean you’ll be ok. Spending habits, goals in careers, work ethic, and financial plans should be talked about by both parties. It’s not gold digging, it’s building wealth.
NETWORTH AND CHILL!!!!!!! Lol love it
You can just let results speak for themselves. You can tell if they care or not about finance.
Facts. Love doesn't pay bills.
ill pay her bills we are not like you women you love that way we love ideallistically
I don’t care if they have money or not, but if they are good for me, then they good for me
People really arguing over sex
Lol “net worth and chill” eeeew
Precisely!!!! I made the biggest mistake of my life… cost n me alot
😶 have a plan but keep ending up in the hospital and missing work and messing up my finances…… guess I am screwed rich BFF. Might as well hide under a rock.