The Hitman Movie is Truly Terrible
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- čas přidán 16. 06. 2024
- for a much better film about a hitman watch the documentary on my life coming out soon
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Edited by QuacK | / quack_001
Outro Song: www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhISc...
#atrioc #Hitman #react - Hry
“He’s wearing a shiny suit and talking loud, there’s no way they’re hiding”
-proceeds to shoot the ground 9 times dressed as a clown to draw attention away-
all while standing on top of a muffin
Least it has a suppressor!!
@@VileCAESARB which does almost nothing cause suppressors don't supress a gunshot fully
@@jsaviourss8049 With subsonic ammo it's shockingly quiet
E
This movie would have been better if Agent 47 had been in a clown suit the whole time
and he did paris over and over again
@@TheProstum lmaoooooo
Would have made it somewhat canon
I have heard Paris is nice this time of year
@@TheProstum I was hoping there'd be a Paris reference in the film
The most disappointing part about the whole movie is he never even stands on a muffin to get the shot
massive oversight
E
The start to the iconic matrix scene and then a jump cut to him in cuffs is unironically funny though
Funny, but certainly not appropriate for a hitman movie
@@nommerz5465 47 has his dark humour though… so it could? I think I’d prefer him escorting a prospective homeowner around a house while commenting on the suitability of each room for killing while it just cuts to the target looking confused. Also we need banter with Diana. And of course we need a clown outfit scene. And we need Sean Bean as one of the bad guys.
Funny if he was deadpool
@@nommerz5465 the people that wrote and produced this can't have played any of the games, feels like they just looked at the game covers and made a movie outta that
@@KleioChronicles But this isn't dark humour, it's a reference to a completely unrelated property, cause Matrix has nothing to do with stealth/assassination. And it's not just a throwaway joke played for laughs, it's a literal plot point. In the games, even when they do silly stuff, they don't show 47 as an incompetent buffoon who figures walking in and getting scanned with a sniper in his coat is the best way to infiltrate an embassy, and can't possibly know they'll place his rifle on the interrogation table, fully loaded, aimed at him. Holy hell that sounds even stupider written down.
His hints to the targets in Whittleton Creek, Mumbai, etc. are cheesy, but they're just self-aware in-jokes. Stuff like the clown outfit, reality-bending suitcase, anything related to AI, are all either side effects or funny consequences of Hitman being a videogame, and wouldn't work in any other medium unless used as an easter egg.
But that doesn't mean humor in a Hitman movie CAN'T work, some of the best action movies in history do have jokes in them lol. The critical distinction is that the Hitman movie had dogshit writing.
They could've made a 30-minute reenactment of an actual Hitman level and made a better film.
Actually that sounds kinda sick. I’d watch that in a heartbeat ong
Even do a hit-and-run vs hitman thing so you can have 2 people going through the level in different routes
I would love a hitman movie from guards pov and the audience is trying to figure out which guard walking around in the background is agent 47.
@@rexrupe3747 watching the target try to survive then dies at the end and you can rewatch to see all the clues leading up to finding out who was 47
@@Zalied That sounds cool
Crazy how companies will make deals with game companies to make movies based on their IPs and then not hire a single person who's actually played the game
Many times the people making the movie don't care. You can give them any advise you want. They still will change it.
whats an IP
@@cycy8699 intellectual property
@@cycy8699 intergalactic penguin
@@hickorywallingford6899 thanks
This is just "Generic Action Movie" with a bad 47 cosplayer as the main character
@LeopardX hahaha hell ya dude that was funny I think that was the best joke I’ve seen down here yet for real I’m laughing so hard rn 🤣
@@damenbaxter8890 yeah dude fr 🤣 this guy would make an excellent comedian
@LeopardX nice bait
It's a cheap, horrifically written piece of trash as an action movie. As a Hitman movie, it's a goddamn war crime.
I think the best way to make a Hitman movie work is to not make 47 the focus, at least for the first half.
Make it a thriller from the target(s)’s POV, make 47 blend in the background in a way that you’d catch him in a second viewing.
that's exactly how the newer games are built, 47 has his own character sure, but he works better as a kinda observer to the story most of the time, then again this was pre hitman reboot and 47 was more the focus of the older game's plot so makes sense ig
Big A finnaly getting into the lucrative movie recap genre that's blown up recently
Big A with the big money
New strat
WATCHING THE TIMOTHY OLYPHANT (2007) VERSION SOON ON STREAM STAY TUNED TO THE DISCORD FOR DATE/TIME.
H̴̡̡̡̼͓̣̼̟̬̻͕̩̫͍̰̳̝̘̳̳̤͇͇̯̟̘͇̹̖̘̞̤̹̹̺̩̰̖̩̬͖̤̒̄̀̆́̎͋̈͌͐̓́̒͐̑͑͆͆̽͗̓́͜͠ͅe̷̠̱̲̬͖̱͙̟̩͉̬̼̥̦̥͎̣̳̞̅͂̋̿̌̔̒͒̇̈́̈́̄͒̈͑̇̿͊̉̾̑͛̑̎̈́̀̚͘͘̚͜͝͝͝l̴̨̡̝͈̪͉̞̘̞̰͕̃͗̀̊̓̐̃̽́̀͊̀̊̀̈́͑̅͗̓̾͊̔͑͆̑̎͌̚̕͘̚̚͝p̷̢̨̗͕͕̫͉̭̦͎̙̻̣͉̠̖̼̟̗̞̖̔͊̽̓́́̈̅́͂͒̔̆̕͝ͅͅ
WOO
@Atrioc I love your videos, I'm going into marketing because of you
>Gets unbanned
>Immediately watches copyrighted movie on stream
The Sigma Grindset
pin
They should've had the actor perform like he's a Terminator. Terminator 2's villain mastered that cold heartless mannerism despite not being the most physically intimidating person.
47 should've been much closer to that to actually feel like a real threat here.
Although they should've recast him anyways because this actor has 0 fucking presence in every scene he's in.
@@ionian525 He was really good in the Mandalorian but he does not fucking work as Agent 47 at all.
Edit: They’re not the same actor, which confuses me because he’s listed as being in the movie yet he’s nowhere to be found.
@@ionian525 he's pretty good in homeland. I think the writing was just so bad no one could save it.
@@tridonstrident6785 he’s in the other Hitman movie
@@calvin8775 yeah I didn’t realize they made two
When is Hitman 2021 staring "Atrioc Glizzy Hands Hitman Sigma Male God Gamer Ewing" coming out?
Would’ve been much better if twitch chat directed it
This is what a better movie would look like if directed by chat lmao
Directed by: Twitch fish plays pokemon
They need to cast the voice actor, David Bateson. He literally looks the part as well as being the iconic voice. And get rid of the god awful writers and stupid CGI. A Hitman movie should be slower and more methodical, these are the qualities that make the character so interesting. No assassinations? no disguises? They have no idea what this franchise is even about.
Movie producers are out of touch. So they still hating on video games like it’s the 90’s and only kids played on their Atari’s and Nintendo consoles.
I think the voice actor is getting a little too old
This is what happens when writers only watch Hitman: Absolution trailers for research.
Bold of you to assume they even watched any of the games.
Big A: *saying he no longer wants to post Hitman content on his channel anymore*
Also Big A: *posts two Hitman related videos in the past week*
If the producer actually played the game it would go like this:
"Agent 47, for this mission you need to dress like a clown, put a muffin on a briefcase and throw a rubber duck over there"
47: "Understood".
Zachary Kinto: Look at him! Look at the way he moves!
Hitman: walks like a normal person.
Nah he was clearly walking with the exaggerated swagger of a nearly-bald assassin in a cheap suit
atrioc fully complaining that agent 47 is too recognizable and loud in the warehouse, but he strolls into restricted areas with a clown suit
Except if they're going to make him recognizable then they might as well put him in a clown suit. You either make it a thriller movie about an incredibly deadly assassin, or a dark comedy about a crazed murderer who thinks he's a hitman dressing up in funny costumes and throwing homing briefcases at people. This is neither.
things this movie should've had:
- Clown suit
- Muffins
- Paris
Also this movie should've been better if it was a 35 minute speedrun.
Fun fact: This movie was made to avoid taxes. The country in which was made has a program that reduces taxes when doing projects like these on it.
Which country is that please?
@@VileCAESARB Germany, that's why the first part played in Berlin
The Uwe Boll tactic.
@@dustgun3861 that’s what I thought when I read OP’s comment. Damn, I haven’t heard that name in a good while.
@@dustgun3861 LMAO that's the same thing I thought
Atrioc you should do a Hitman race with Linkus but you have to get a specific mission score for each location.. so like 110 for Paris, 170 for Colorado that kinda thing.. that way you'd have to work out what you can and can't do to make sure you get the right score
The 2007 version is one of my guilty pleasures. This one is just terrible.
I was really excited cause that's what I thought he was watching. It was kind of a rude awakening when I saw the suit :/
Is this hitman:agent 47 movie?
Right there with ya. I watch the 07 version a couple times a year lol
First time watching it (and only in 2007 at cinema). It had me til he jumps in the river from 20 plus feet with no shoes or socks on 10 mins in, trash confirmed haha.
@@VileCAESARB lol true but the rest of the movie was still preetty good
What makes it even more hilarious is, that the executive producer in the movie was Vin Diesel.
wrong one
I think the worst part of these hitman movies is that the story plays out like someone doing a bad run and gun playthrough of hitman. use disguises! USE POISON! don't just stare your target in the eyes once they've caught onto you and walk slowly at them!
Zachary Quinto does not have this listed as an actor on imdb, pro move
I feel like nobody in Hollywood knows the definition of "syndicate"so they just throw it in any secret org name and hope nobody in the audience thinks about it too hard.
genuinely curious how they let this script/story be made into a movie
6:40 Kicking the table in an interrogation room and it is not bolted down. A mistake that, in reality, probably nobody made in the last 100 years. lol
"What's the budget of this movie?"
Nearly FIVE TIMES the budget of The Raid ONE AND TWO COMBINED.
Bro... the raid is sooo much better than this absolute monstrosity lol
@@nickdaiz1111
I'm not looking forward to the American remake of The Raid at all.
@Sewer Tapes
Yeah me neither, american versions of foreign movies usually suck and tbh american fighting movies are very mid
@@nickdaiz1111
I think it's because most of our American action stars are just actors, without a solid martial arts background. Don't get me wrong, I have crazy amounts of respect for guys like Keanu Reeves who train heavily for action roles, but it isn't the same.
@@SewerTapes yeah thats definitely a part of it but i think a huge chunk is very poor choreography and specifically bad jump cuts that destroy the momentum of the fights. If you pay attention to the fights in the raid, a lot of them are long continuous shots
That triple shot combo of stolen ideas though. We got the Matrix pat-down scene INTO the Dark Knight Joker gets caught on purpose scene INTO the verbatim dialogue from Watchmen “I’m not locked in here with you, you’re locked in here with me”… truly incredibly bad
Always makes me chuckle that the guy who plays Hitman is literally named "Friend". What a Master of Disguise.
Truly a masterpiece, this will surely go down as one of the greatest films of the decade and possibly of the century. Quite literally the Citizens Kane of our time, this will go down in history books and will be taught in school curriculum for the foreseeable future.
Hitman: Agent 47 really is the Citizen Kane of movies.
I want a movie that shows a character crawl away from a battle alive and the post credit scene is the opposite and just shows that guy die with no further consequences
anyone here know when this was streamed? i’d love to watch this vod
Great idea for a second movie: They actually represent the game in the movie and every hit target is the old cast from the first movie.
*third
I don't know what Big A is talking about, this is exactly like the elusive target with the iPad. 10/10 accurate Hitman
I'm always talking with a friend on how much material Hitman has to offer as a movie. Literally take any fleshed-out mission and extrapolate on its story, Sapienza for example already has all the makings of a movie. Or combine existing missions as early assassination filler and finish it off with a big showdown with the head of the conspiracy/syndicate
When was this stream? Is there a Vod available?
change the title to "the hitman movie is a cinematic disaster" this video will pop off
Is there a vod for this? I can't find it.
Found out this existed yesterday, what a coincidence
"Agent 47, your target is Gene Eric. His security detail is on watch 24/7 so you-"
"Can't do ti Dianna"
"What?"
"He's got security around the clock."
Does anyone know which stream this is from? I would like to watch the whole vod.
atrioc you promised us this was only for the twitch. crying.
i remember going to see this movie with my grandma,
we had an empty theater because no one went to see it lmao
when i was bored i did finger puppets through the projector good time better than the movie
@@remydetrou734 i was like i think? 12 or close to that at the time
19 now and every time i’ve gotten a theatre by myself or with friends and family cause no one showed up
still will do finger puppet thing never gets old
@@connsescape3247 honestly it’s funny I might have to do it lol
Something simple like just putting a level or two to film would have been x100 more entertaining lol
Imagine getting something like Colorado into Berlin, with a SMALL amount of tweaking so the crazy info board shows 47 that he's been discovered. That leads to him trying to meet up with an ICA contact in Berlin to figure out how, only to realise he's been set-up BY the ICA, and now he has to Apex Predator his way out. That would be sick as hell
"what am I?"
"If you keep asking questions probably dead"
😂
It is allowed to stream movies on Twitch?
Was VOD DELETED?? Cant find it
they really sold me on the npc aspect of it. makes me feel like I'm really playing the game!
Where can i find the full stream?
+1
I watched this once when it came out, thought it was really good.
Yeah, I was wrong. So very wrong
They had a budget of $35 million and somehow failed to procure a tailored suit for the protagonist...
You can stream movies on twitch now?
This movie seemed so bad it was hard to watch it for even 16 minutes. Thanks Big A for making it tolerable
14:16 WHY DID THEY USE AN INHALER FOR A DETONATOR
Noticed that with the suit too. The budget was smaller than the previous one, but my casual every day suits cost me $400 and my better ones for special occasions and events cost $1000. Hell, Zara’s $60-100 suits look better.
This one looks like the suit you buy in $20 Halloween costumes of FBI agents. Definitely not Italian.
I love watching Atrioc vids, its like I'm hanging out with him
have you Atrioc seen the other Hitman Movie? How was it? i hvaent seen youre entire vid line up so idk if you have or not
"Main character weight energy" bro That dead ass is every movie script.
If I had to make a Hitman movie I would go for a comedy. It’s basically impossible to make a good game movie that’s also a drama. Game mechanics are inherently kind of dumb, you can’t ignore that.
6:45 table, chairs, everything's supposed to be bolted down
I hope Mr. Glizzy just uses lines from this movie in his next Hitman stream.
The fiber wire kill was actually really cool. The building losing power was kinda dumb, but the actual kill was awesome.
"Italian Wool."
Man that's Nylon. He's gonna be assassinating people with static shocks.
I wish there was a hitman movie from the view of the targets and henchman, it would be such a great horror movie
I was actually about to rent the movie on CZcams before I saw this video underneath it.
The way he moves is so hitman like that it can be used to prove a wild claim to a complete stranger. Very stealthy.
Can’t believe linkus took the role of agent 47 before he ever played hitman
1:22 the tie looks like a fruit roll-up
They tried to make Hitman an action movie, but it really should have been more like a heist movie, setting up a plan and watching 47 adapt to obstacles along the way
Catch me calling the movie in chat 1 second before he reveals at the very start
Mans got his suit at Mens Warehouse
His bespoke French cut two piece suit
Very nice
Does anyone have a link for the original stream?
6:50. Who tf keeps the gun loaded???
9:50. The engine before only managed to pull the chair into it and now from at least 100 feet, 2 full grown men maybe about 190 to 220. Mmm yes.
funny thing is they couldve just made a whole ass movie series about each mission, the mission titles already sound like movie titles for example: Hitman: the showstopper or shit like that yknow
i swear his hair gets noticeably longer as the movie goes on
How does the guns trigger fire when you make the gun go a little bit up and down
How is he able to stream a full movie on Twitch? Isn't this a bit illegal?
Truely a cinematic masterpiece
They sent an intern to the closest h&m to grab their cheapest polyester suit
The suit and that 5 o'clock shadow on his head, that's agent 47
big A you gotta watch the Freddie Wong Hitman video, uses the stunt double for the Hitman movies who actually looks like 47. promise it's better than the actual movies
I was there, he told us it would be a Twitch Exclusive. Brandon lied to us :'(
marketing trick
When was the stream?
@@vanqiishr9827 About 2 or 3 weeks ago, he deleted the vod.
They need the villian from Shazam to be Agent 47
I love how in 14:08 they shoot non silenced guns and they sound like from some old game xddd
They wanted to make an action movie about a guy who when played to character is quiet slow and silent
The complete wrong actor to play 47. He doesn't have a low voice, he has hair, and he doesn't have the physique.
Hitman movie: boom explosions! Epic gunfights! Sentimental message!
Hitman game: drowning someinf in a clown suit after using an Emetic duck
Why are all of the gunshots “silenced” while suppressors are never once attached
Bruh if I went to see this in theater I'd have walked out
I think he lost silent assassin
I've said it before and I'll say it many many more times, the one main reason why this movie is so bad, is the fact that they were too lazy to get just a baldcap for 47. Why the hell does he have hair follicles? Literally the whole point of 47 is so that he can't leave behind any evidence, no blood, no saliva, no hair. HOW. DO. YOU. FUCK. THAT. UP??
Everything about 47 is just absolutely horrible in this movie, the movie would have a perfect ending if that was an imposter 47 and the real 47 shoots him in the head then immediately says "it's done." That'd be the perfect ending to this dog shit and there's no argument.
Edit: HOLY FUCK WAIT THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED?! I WAS JOKING!! I'M DEAD!
Atrioc wants the whole movie to be hitman with a sniper standing on top of a muffin
I think this 47 is just way too human, like whats special about 47 is his cold lifeless face expression. Not giving a shit about what he's doing, and this one just wasn't it and was also not similar in looks
10:37 F-Word slipped through
Oh god they made another one? I remember the one with Timothy Olyphant. That wasn't too bad. Though I do agree, having gunfights in a movie about a silent assassin is silly. Especially when you know how ludicrously lethal gunfights are to you in the game.
Kinda crazy how you cut out the many, many, many times you said this was never ever going on the youtube, entirely twitch exclusive anti-youtube, and now here we are.
Keep up the great content, we love farming LULWs here Mr. Glizzard!
Omg that chase ending was so bad. Driving over that thing full speed would not only just rip apart the oil pan but the transmission too 🤣🤣