Girl came up to me and interrupted my piano practice to stare blankly with no expression nor a hi and expected me to carry. I probably should have but that was the last thing I wanted to do in that moment.
Haha that's another level and I'm up to. I am an enthusiast in Meteorology and I commonly say things like "How beautiful is the weather today" when it's broken and the people doesn't understand what is the beauty that I see haha
Heres the main points of ths video for everyone who wants to sum it up: -you cam leave a conversation if you want, they dont all have to be successful and its ok to leave if its super akward and uninteresting (I would only do this after trying the other strategies in the video) -ask questions, especially ones that will have an emotional connection with the other person (its important to mention that if you just met this person, dont get to vulnerable (as in trauma) as they may not want to talk about and will feel akward) -attempt to connect over shared interests or ask someone about their interests (I find its easier to do this when you ask them questions in a shared environment, for example of youre both a on a sport team ask them what they like about it or how long theyve been playing) -its ok to tak pauses! Thry aren't as akward as you think and it can give you a good amount of time to naturally ask questions You can't expect every social encounter to be every thing you were hoping it would be, but its important to keep going at it, as thats how youll get used to it abd build tons of social skills.
"Do not carry the weight of an entire conversation on your shoulders" couldn't be any truer. Any conversation, be it face to face, an online chat or video chat, is always dynamic. Its kind of like a dance between talking and listening, not one is more important than the other.
I turned into a conversational master one time coming down off of a shroom trip, never felt more alive, this video pretty much summed up how I talked, making connections between things and expanding on them, I have been kinda trying to reach that level of conversing since then with limited success, but this video really dissected my experience and made me understand better what I was doing, thank you for this insightful and very well put together video. you sir, have earned another subscriber
The comedown is always my favorite part, when everything feels like it is exactly where it belongs. I understand exactly what you're talking about. Though keeping the lesson throughout daily life is the difficult part.
Had a similar experience! Came down off of a trip and had the most relaxed and friendly conversation with an old lady at a bus stop. I usually don't ever talk to strangers in public lol.
i'm an anbivert (more leaning to extroverted) but i keep reminding myself ''oh if i get nervous they'll be able to tell'' and social anxiety goes dskadkaskdas but then i remind myself they may be nervous as i am, and honestly getting tips and help have been huuuge help
great insight! you are right, most people are just as or even more nervous. keep practicing and it will start to become much more natural. wishing you all the best-
@@Komi_Is_My_Namei get what you mean, but, his user is “simple really” while all of his videos end with “easy actually” so i dont think believe hes actually trying to create his own brand i think hes just trying to steal clicks when people search up “easy actually”
@@derpinheimer2993 while that last part may be true. I appreciate that he provides good value in his content as well so it's still a win for me as a viewer
i genuinly don't think asking questions is a skill, it all depends on how much youre actually interested in a person, if you ask what you actually care about then it's easy
that's great insight, if you GENUINELY care / are interested in a convo, asking questions becomes natural because it is your own curiosity. in my line of work, the skill comes in how a question is asked, timing, pace, tonality etc. But as you said, the genuine interest in a conversation is the biggest driver in being a good conversationalist
@@user-jq9xf6vi8kyour so right. You feel like you can’t even engage in a proper question with people like that. I have better conversations in my head.
One of the most important lessons to learn when communicating with someone, anyone, is how you talk. Delivery is key. You have to be confident that whatever you're talking about is the best thing since sliced bread then watch how the conversation flows thereafter. Oh, and what's just as important as opening and maintaining a conversation is how you close it. Remember to not linger on anything for too long, lest it goes stale.
I agree with you! Most of the time, it's not what you say but how you say it. appreciate you watching and adding your insight, should help more people build the skill!
I actually got made fun of for the whole "pause" thing you were talking about, people were telling me stuff like "Oh, bro's lagging!" and "Bro has high ping LMAOOOOOO!" when I try to pause for a few seconds before giving an answer. I don't know how some of these mfs answer a question the millisecond after they hear it, I can't even do that if someone asks me "What's your name?"
"you will never be criticized by someone doing more than you" is a saying that comes to mind. There is a vocal / speaking coach I have learned a lot from - Vinh Giang. He has a youtube channel with good content on it. He talks about the pause a lot. just like any other skill, takes practice. Keep at it and you'll get it my friend
I don’t know if it’s just me, but I’m an introvert on top of being detached from everything, I barely go out with people or meet my relatives, so I have little to no experiences to share and I end up feeling that I have nothing to talk about, it’s a never ending loophole but hopefully I get over that soon
Throw yourself into your hobbies, and try to find people that help support those hobbies. I feel very safe in environments where someone I'm talking to and I are both knowledgeable on a subject and working towards the same goal. Helped me gain confidence and get practice.
It is very hard to tell stories when there aren't any stories to tell. Would you be ok if you didn't have anything to share when it's all said and done? I agree with @chloehall628 , find environments that are aligned with you and your interests and start there. That's the easiest place to practice. Keep me posted on your progress, I want to see how it goes! Appreciate you and your input @chloehall628 , it will definitely help people!
you are not the only one dude that’s exactly how i am. I feel like since i’ve lived no life to begin with, it’s hard to go on and try to seem like a cool person to others especially when they’ve all done so much and I haven’t done anything cool or interesting ever
that's insanely true, when i see people around my age they have infinite more experiences/responsability and knowledge about life that i will ever get so i just got nothing to say at all
@@slapshotjack9806 Im sorry for what youre going through, but I think you are refering to another topic right now. In your case, these friends of yours dont invite you to hangouts but the original comment was talking about being detatched from everything. My advice would be to reconsider this group of friends because if you were actually valued by them, you wouldn't miss a single one of the planed trips and going outs. If i understood well, the problem you have is not general. You just need to be surrounded by people who respect and value you :)
That little nugget at the end was fucking golden. Both the responding and leveraging of emotion and the example of flirting. Make the flirting video now. You are the only person I have found online to break it down in a manner that can be applied.
from someone who is really bad from a social standby, just say some random things i mean be yourself and see if people match you, then don't change for someone , keep yourself as yourself
Only laziness can beat you. Even if your growth is not as fast as other channels, make sure to keep believing and keep posting because i believe in you ❤️
Usually my only problem is i fear I'll say some creepy shit or something no-one in the world thinks or agrees on except me. And so i might forever ruin any further attempt at conversation with them this way.
I can relate, I used to feel the same too. might be some "out there" nonsense but when you really know yourself and have a good relationship with yourself, that cures that fear. There have been multiple times in life where I've said a joke I genuinely thought was HILARIOUS to a group. and they looked at me like they heard the dumbest joke ever. Doesn't change how I feel about the joke, I still laughed because it was something I believed in and made me laugh. So why would I change how I feel about it based on someone else's opinion? Told it again in a different circle and they loved it. No matter what, someone wont like you / your view. As long as it's true to you, one person not liking what you have to say doesnt matter at all. wishing you all the best my friend, appreciate you watching
I really appreciate this man. I am 18 and have literally no friends. I graduated early from highschool and never really connected with anyone. I am heading to college this month. Hope this helps. Thanks again.
man, you have no idea how much valuable information this has. i dont comment much on videos, but i felt the need to here. i always feel like the only way i can barely attempt to keep conversations going is by either, 1: trying to be funny or sarcastic, which usually doesn’t last long, or 2: talking about how awkward the conversation is, which, at a certain point, gets boring for me to talk about over and over. i never knew how to ask questions about the other person’s topic, but this truly helped me feel more confident in my conversation skills. i didnt realize that you could ask a question more directed at how they feel about the subject. thank you. i will be using this for my future conversations.
Appreciate you my friend and thanks for watching! Glad you found some value here, and more coming tomorrow- Wishing you all the best on your continued journey
I can't describe how much i needed this. I went through your channel to find more useful videos like this, which did meet my expectations, but one thing I didn't except is the amount of subscribers you have, given how great your style, sense of humor and way of explaining things are. it's simple, really 😁
thanks for your comment, made my day! I'm glad you found some value here, more on the way soon- anything you would like to see a video on in the future?
Im an extrovert and I still found I sometimes have surprisingly poor convo skills that leave lasting impressions and I really liked the little drawing tidbits during the verbal explanation (especially the constant callback to the subscribe jokes). I'll subscribe because I want to "let you know I've received value from you" to use your exact words. The 3rd layer of responding to an "underlying message" seems a bit difficult to incorporate/understand at the moment, but awesome to see how unaware I was of this
as long as you received value, that is what counts. If needed, focus on the basics before moving on to the underlying messages. Once the basics become natural, the rest is much easier
The first thing I do is ask the other person if they play genshin, star rail, prosekai, draw, stuff I like etc. If they don’t, then ask them what they do in their free time. Ask more questions about themselves until you find something you both have in common. e.g. you both like reading books or stuff like that then talk about that hobby
Oh my gosh, I need this. I am a seasonal camp counselor for high schoolers, and I'm 20 and by far the most difficult part of the job is just talking to the students during our "in-between" times, like during our meal times and the times we transition between activities. I was told this year to incorporate our power skills terminology as much as possible, so I took that to a T (being a task-oriented introvert that takes everything too literally), but realized that none of my team was interested in anything I had to say the entire time. In previous years, I did what you said in here and the results were so much better! I will definitely need this preparing for my next camp, so hi future me. And thank you sir for making this so I know how to improve rather than beat myself up, haha.
I’m glad to hear you found some value here! Seems like you already knew what to do, just needed a little reminder. You got this! Appreciate you caring about how you make an impact in the world too-
So I have this coworker who is a bit of an introvert. He isn't the type to start a conversation. I'm also an introvert but I would describe myself as a social introvert. I can make up conversation when I want to. Well I was feeling a little bored one day so I struck up a conversation with him. We talked about stuff and at one point he mentioned that he likes videogames. I used to spend a lot of my time playing games but for the past two years I have barely played anything. I asked what kind of setup he had and the specs for his computer. The funny thing is that I know nothing about computer parts. Needless to say I didn't understand a word. But I kept it going. I made him do all the talking and asked small questions here and there. In the end I got to know a lot about him. Pretty cool dude. You really don't even need to know anything about that topic, just use any small piece of information you know.
crazy thing is he probably loved the conversation and left thinking you were a great conversationalist... even though you weren't the one talking lol. Great example man, appreciate you watching and giving your insight. I'm sure it has helped someone else as well-
4:45 Letterman's original response could have been better, but he was on the right track. You can't keep asking questions or turn the spotlight completely on yourself after the 2nd question and ignore what the other person has to say. You should say something that acknowledges what the other person says THEN follow up with another question. So imo this is how the conversation should have gone - "Where are you from?" - "Wilmington, Delaware." - "Ah, I don't know many people from Wilmington. Tell me about the place, what's the thing you like most about Wilmington?" - "(river)" - "(river follow up)"
I thought that high school was gonna give me some hope on getting friends. I guess not. I'm going to college and it's my only hope, but it's probably gonna be me lonely again.
Never running out of things to say can actually be a bad thing too. Guys specifically think if they make themselves smart and share how much they know or how much they achieved, or their controversial opinions they are going to win their audiences when actually that can backfire. It takes 2 to have a conversation. I don't like people who monologue me just because I am making space for them to be comfortable to share, doesn't mean I am a weak, passive, a pushover, an easy to win impressionable person or anything like that. Do you actually care to build a connection with me or are you just an arrogant show off person who is too deep inside their own arse.
4:15 that's, to me, a perfectly good question. the moment he fucked up was not asking a second question. so indeed there's no *very* bad questions, any question can be caught up. just dont ask something out of pocket, really "where are you from originally?" *answers* "oh i dont know anyone from there!" -> should've been *answers* "oh do you miss it?" *answers* etc. nevermind it's in the video
I guess my problem is that I’m not very naturally interested in other people… I think I tend to mostly focus on the conversation topic itself instead of what the person thinks about it, like I’ll only take their opinion on it in order to discuss it and compare it to mine…? So if someone’s talking purely about some experience they had I don’t know how to engage with it at all. I think that lack of self confidence also makes me feel like my own experiences aren’t worth enough to communicate, but that’s another thing
is it people in general or people that don't share your interests? if the second, find a group that has shared interests, then you can share experiences for DAYS. Also, I'm not great at talking about things I have no experience, expertise, or confidence in either. So I don't speak about them lol. Confidence comes through repetition my friend. You can do it, just one rep/ convo at a time
@@santiagovidal4497kinda similar experience here.. for example, most people in my country love cricket and i don’t.. i’m more interested in badminton.. so i can’t relate to them and enjoy when they’re talking about it n all but then i realized that it wouldn’t hurt to know the basics of cricket and just to have an idea u know.. the more u know, the better and if you have no idea about an experience they’re talking about, just show that you’re interested and ask open ended questions.. it’s not like you’re gonna find people who share the same interests as you all the time right.. so just be open minded and act like you care alsooo most people are supportive than you think so like just talk about your experiences as well.. when doing that.. delivery is the key soo like just dramatize the way you speak..that’s gonna keep them hooked so uh just go out more and have more experiences and get out of your comfort zone… social skills are like a muscle.. so if you train it well you can improve so much
I’m an extrovert but I’ve recently lost my sense of identity after going through many very emotionally stressful things, it hurts having to relearn how to be myself.
I feel for you my friend, wishing you the best as you build yourself back up again. In one frame, the ability to recreate yourself however you want can be exciting! not always easy, but exciting. Keep me posted on your progress, excited to see what you do-
Thank you!! This video was really interesting and I think I learnt a lot!! I feel like I don't have problems starting a conversation and just asking questions to get to know the other person, but when it comes to continuing the conversation I lose it haha 😅 It's like the conversation is just me asking questions and the other person answering them, which is really uncomfortable... And when the other person asks me a question to continue the conversation, I just give a really dry answer unintentionally and then regret it. I also feel like it's because I'm afraid I might talk too much and bother the other person. This is why I'm so glad your video covered it up!!! I will try to put your advice to practice and thank you again!!💞💞
I’m glad you found some value here! Try taking one aspect / topic at a time and practicing it.. then you can keep adding other skills. You got this! Appreciate you-
I think my problem is I zone out of the conversation because whatever they’re saying doesn’t interest me. (Ik it’s rude) I’m gonna apply these tips to my social interactions now, hopefully it helps with this dilemma 🤷🏻♀️
the most awkward interaction I’ve had recently was talking to a girl at work. I was asking questions and she was answering them but it felt like I was interviewing her instead of sharing my interests too. I ended her thoughts with oh I was just wondering instead of sharing what my favorite music is or my favorite songs.
@@BigManTing79 give some examples od such questions And i disagree, its not always OP's responsibility, he was just dealing with awful uninterested/ing person
@@BigManTing79 you know when in a conversation I really don’t think like that I try to flow as much as possible but just as @simplereally said i think i was in my head trying to control it all when it’s a two person thing.
I just discovered your channel and this video inspired me to become a pretty good constantly improving communicator so I can actually go through this life smoothly, don't ruin it and keep going. F your haters but I doubt they exist lol (don't make it be the effort reducing parts of your brain ). KEEP GOING
I appreciate you and thanks for your support! I'm glad you found some value here. It's a skill like everything else, and we can all improve. More value coming very soon-
I’d also like to add that , for a general rule of conversation especially when you’re meeting someone for the first time, it’s important to not talk too much about yourself. I feel that asking questions about someone and their stories rather than butting in constantly and saying “I remember something like that..” or “that reminds me of..” keeps the conversation solely rooted on that person. At the end of the day people like to feel valued and heard and focusing the conversation on them is a great way to do that combined with the fact that if you’re trying to talk to the opposite sex it is useful in seeming more mysterious and attractive.
Great video man! I sometimes struggle with conversation because I have a stuttering problem, it's not as bad as it was a couple of years ago but it still happens yk. I try not to think about it too much and just go with the flow of the conversation and ask follow-up questions. I've been getting better at talking with people but it can be quite draining still. Have a good one mate!
let me know how it goes! if it worked, great. if not, try to figure out why and make an adjustment. from there, you are closer to making it work. keep doing that and there is no way you don't improve
i tend to trip over my words and putting together a thoughtful conversational response like some of these examples seems almost out of the question for me. But when I talk about things I'm excited about, I can't shut up.
That’s the key! When positive emotion comes into the conversation it becomes much easier for everyone Just make sure the other person feels important / included too. Appreciate you watching -
I'd like to point out something, and it's the importance of having a mentor: mimicking and having someone drive you through the process is really helpful but with the rise of social media - video games - porn consumption, the loneliness epidemic and generally speaking more and more people being individualistic I fear we will see a rise of people with very poor social skills in the future. We should have more mentors in society, especially when it comes to flirting, since that shit is very hard to master if you don't practice it IRL. Thanks for the video, keep it up.
agree with you 1000%! a mentor/coach/etc is a huge asset. The most successful usually have multiple, but people who are just scraping by think it is a silly thing to do appreciate you my friend and thanks for your input!
the video is nice and i understand fully the whole point but if someone brings up something that a i have in comon or have knowledge on and also talk about it people will just tell me ``no one asked``
I’m not a natural extrovert; I’m very much an introvert, but I got myself a customer service job and I can assure you that regardless of whatever advice you follow, it’s going to feel like hard work to get used to talking to people. I can keep a conversation going for 40 minutes, and I can talk to people all day, but I still have a social battery that can still run out, and once I’m done, I’m done, stop talking to me.
I agree with you - simple, but not easy! conversations can be exhausting (i'm in sales so after a long day, I'm wiped). it's a mental workout. Appreciate you watching, hoping you found some value here-
@tonyjumpscliffs lot of tools you can use like @pyxn420 said lol- gifs, memes etc. Would have to see some examples, but would focus on the emotion in a convo to move it to the next stage which is usually in person. Then you are good!
@simplereally. I would like to hear a video about how troublesome is it to date people in our current society. Meeting people is easy. But finding actual good people is challenging. Also not a huge fan of dating apps.. like many other people lol
appreciate you and thanks for your feedback! glad you found some value, and hoping you find more in the video that is posting tomorrow. should offer a new perspective on life-
by the love of all thats holy dont use 10:50 if you have no indicator that the person likes talking to you. otherwise you'll seem like a creep, or as if you are doubting them
Maybe you can say it nonchalantly... That way you have plausible deniability, and if she presses you about it you can just say you were referring to her actual stamina and that it wasn't meant to be sexual. But yeah, this takes incredible mastery to pull off successfully
Great video, Could you expand on how to speak with people with relatively low communication skills ? I often find myself speaking with reserved people who won't be good at entertaining a conversation even though they are clearly interested in the conversation and in me. How to respond when the answers are always dry ?
do you enjoy those conversations? If not, I try to avoid them - life is too short. If you do, sometimes it just takes a little bit more time for people to open up. vulnerability is a way to do that depending on a convo (if you show it, it makes them feel like they can trust you). depends on the situation / conversation
My question is how do I start a conversation without feeling awkward. People nowadays would rather die than start a conversation with a person they don’t know?
Isn’t that interesting to think about? If it offers any comfort, most everyone else feels the same (I think it’s funny to think about). If you are up for a challenge, next time you are at a Starbucks, etc.. after you order, ask the cashier if you can have the drink / meal for free. Small chance, you might actually get a free meal. Most likely, they will say no. Do that a few times and you will realize that is the worst case scenario of any interaction. And life goes on
I just watched the whole video again and I have no recollection of my thought process on how my comment is linked to the video 💀@@simplereally. Still, love ya boo
I think that the Joe Rogan analogy fails if we're referring to casual every-day convos. He has days, if not weeks to prepare in advance for the people he's going to speak with, that's mainly why he has always something to say, or something that the other person is going to be interested about. Usually one's going to encounter a lot more "failures" in finding something interesting to talk about.
Ok so the the basics are: -Do open questions. Ex: what do u like the most about that place? - Dont feel the need for a good conversation -Talk about interestings topics -respond to same emotion level -be present at the moment -be ok with pauses
@@simplereally. i am practicing literally rn. In a roblox game with voice chat, but it doesnt matter. Practice is practice. I also practice in real life interactions a lot, but in games it is easier. Cuz u can meet people faster and leave them faster to talk to new people
@@simplereally. i am already confident in real life to talk to anyone. But interacting in games still have it's benefits, even if u are already confident to talk to people irl
When a topic is naturally coming to an end, I've had to learn that there doesn't need to be a smooth transition to the next topic. Does it help if it's smooth? Yeah, but that's better than a really long and awkward pause
there's a lot of different directions you can take from that awkward pause stage... good news is, most things in life really don't matter. so if the awkward pause stage is the worst thing that can happen you will be fine. my thought process is call the 'elephant in the room' out when it is there - followed by a genuine compliment of the other person. more often than not, the other person feels it too and will get some relief. from there, the the possibilities are endless thanks for watching and wishing you all the best-
This doesn’t work. You try to relate to people during conversations and they just want to keep talking about themselves. I can only handle so many one sided conversations, I’m done trying.
This is foundational communication skills. Seems like you are wanting to learn about controlling conversations, strategically interrupting, etc. What do you feel would help you get to the next level?
@@simplereally. I appreciate the reply. No, I’m not trying to control conversations. I’m far too self conscious for that. I’m talking about when there’s a lull in the other person’s story or whatever they’re talking about, and when I pipe in, they seem incredibly disinterested. I know how to politely and respectfully speak to people, but others seem more interested in themselves than actually holding a conversation. I don’t interrupt. I’ll actually gesture to try to get a word in. But I get trampled. Maybe I should just be rude and interrupt, because that seems to be what people do. But I can’t do that. So I’m done trying. If people want my input, they need to ask for it. And in my job, they need my input. They can either ask for it, or keep quiet so I can give it. I get interrupted. Oh well. What the job done? Let me talk.
@@singusbiggle9977 there are few people I feel understand my struggles in my sales career early on but that hits the nail on the head lol. I HAVE BEEN THERE it honestly depends on what you want out of the conversation. If you want to be liked, continue to let them dominate the conversation. They will feel like you care, and that always tips the probability of a relationship (friend or more) in your favor If you want to get a sale or speak your mind, you have to find ways to STRATEGICALLY interrupt the conversation. for example, if someone is telling you their life story.. "I just applied to USC to be a doctor and [xyz]"... and on and on and on. you can interrupt and say, "wait did you just say USC? I have [xyz short statement (true or not) about USC." and you briefly mention it and then say, "wait, we could talk about this forever. what were we talking about? Oh yeah... XYZ" and then you lead the convo where you want helped me a lot in sales when dealing with people who like to talk about anything and everything while i'm trying to provide for a family lol
What is the most awkward social interaction you've ever had? comment below- we've all had them
Me with the girl i liked :(
When you ask someone an open ended question and they answer bluntly and don't continue the conversation or ask you in return.
They do it everytime!
when you are speaking clearly but the other person asks you to repeat yourself more than once
Girl came up to me and interrupted my piano practice to stare blankly with no expression nor a hi and expected me to carry. I probably should have but that was the last thing I wanted to do in that moment.
As a Weather Forecaster, talking about the weather is a completely valid option.
I’ll give you that one for sure lol
Appreciate you and thanks for watching-
Haha that's another level and I'm up to. I am an enthusiast in Meteorology and I commonly say things like "How beautiful is the weather today" when it's broken and the people doesn't understand what is the beauty that I see haha
Heres the main points of ths video for everyone who wants to sum it up:
-you cam leave a conversation if you want, they dont all have to be successful and its ok to leave if its super akward and uninteresting (I would only do this after trying the other strategies in the video)
-ask questions, especially ones that will have an emotional connection with the other person (its important to mention that if you just met this person, dont get to vulnerable (as in trauma) as they may not want to talk about and will feel akward)
-attempt to connect over shared interests or ask someone about their interests (I find its easier to do this when you ask them questions in a shared environment, for example of youre both a on a sport team ask them what they like about it or how long theyve been playing)
-its ok to tak pauses! Thry aren't as akward as you think and it can give you a good amount of time to naturally ask questions
You can't expect every social encounter to be every thing you were hoping it would be, but its important to keep going at it, as thats how youll get used to it abd build tons of social skills.
appreciate you watching and helping others with the short notes version! let's make it a good year-
@@simplereally. Thanks for making the video!!
You got that right!
Thx man
I’m a 100% extrovert until it comes to people that i feel they don’t like me or crushes so tysm i didn’t knew the « techniques » 😭
Glad you found some value here! Appreciate you watching, next video is out tomorrow with more value-
this!!
Well I wish I was an extrovert but I still can't stop being nervous talking to people
Ok showoff-
"Do not carry the weight of an entire conversation on your shoulders" couldn't be any truer. Any conversation, be it face to face, an online chat or video chat, is always dynamic. Its kind of like a dance between talking and listening, not one is more important than the other.
I turned into a conversational master one time coming down off of a shroom trip, never felt more alive, this video pretty much summed up how I talked, making connections between things and expanding on them, I have been kinda trying to reach that level of conversing since then with limited success, but this video really dissected my experience and made me understand better what I was doing, thank you for this insightful and very well put together video. you sir, have earned another subscriber
appreciate you my friend! interesting to hear some parallels from different experiences. Let's make it a good year, yeah?
@@simplereally. lets hope so buddy :)
The comedown is always my favorite part, when everything feels like it is exactly where it belongs. I understand exactly what you're talking about. Though keeping the lesson throughout daily life is the difficult part.
@@behindthepie9430 tell it like it is brother
Had a similar experience! Came down off of a trip and had the most relaxed and friendly conversation with an old lady at a bus stop. I usually don't ever talk to strangers in public lol.
wow, i don’t have awful social skills, i just don’t give myself time to think of questions or responses. yipee!!!😍😍
I'm afraid there's a bit of comment in your sarcasm madam 😎
awesome to see you again my friend! appreciate you like always, keep me posted on your progress so we can celebrate together-
@@simplereally. i know this was probably for the other person replying but thanks i will :3
Same at my big age
i'm an anbivert (more leaning to extroverted) but i keep reminding myself ''oh if i get nervous they'll be able to tell'' and social anxiety goes dskadkaskdas but then i remind myself they may be nervous as i am, and honestly getting tips and help have been huuuge help
great insight! you are right, most people are just as or even more nervous. keep practicing and it will start to become much more natural. wishing you all the best-
did you make up that term anbivert? sounds like an excuse for poor socialization like "muh autism" or something
copying another channel is easy, actually
i noticed that too bro😭
Its fine if you are just starting and you'll slowly find your own style. So, no pressure on that.
@@Komi_Is_My_Namei get what you mean, but, his user is “simple really” while all of his videos end with “easy actually” so i dont think believe hes actually trying to create his own brand i think hes just trying to steal clicks when people search up “easy actually”
@@derpinheimer2993 while that last part may be true. I appreciate that he provides good value in his content as well so it's still a win for me as a viewer
Bruh hes just making them seo friendly, otherwise the vids wont show up on ur feed @@derpinheimer2993
Im definitely a better listener than I am at asking questions.
i genuinly don't think asking questions is a skill, it all depends on how much youre actually interested in a person, if you ask what you actually care about then it's easy
asking questions is part of listening. If you're just standing there while someone is talking you might as well be a wall
that's great insight, if you GENUINELY care / are interested in a convo, asking questions becomes natural because it is your own curiosity. in my line of work, the skill comes in how a question is asked, timing, pace, tonality etc. But as you said, the genuine interest in a conversation is the biggest driver in being a good conversationalist
@@user-jq9xf6vi8k you're definitely right about that
@@user-jq9xf6vi8kyour so right. You feel like you can’t even engage in a proper question with people like that. I have better conversations in my head.
If you smile to them, laugh and nod, they automatically continue the conversation without you saying anything.
- introvert.
can relate, but it is funny to think how powerful those three things can be!
appreciate you watching, much more value coming VERY soon-
One of the most important lessons to learn when communicating with someone, anyone, is how you talk. Delivery is key. You have to be confident that whatever you're talking about is the best thing since sliced bread then watch how the conversation flows thereafter. Oh, and what's just as important as opening and maintaining a conversation is how you close it. Remember to not linger on anything for too long, lest it goes stale.
I agree with you! Most of the time, it's not what you say but how you say it. appreciate you watching and adding your insight, should help more people build the skill!
I actually got made fun of for the whole "pause" thing you were talking about, people were telling me stuff like "Oh, bro's lagging!" and "Bro has high ping LMAOOOOOO!" when I try to pause for a few seconds before giving an answer. I don't know how some of these mfs answer a question the millisecond after they hear it, I can't even do that if someone asks me "What's your name?"
"you will never be criticized by someone doing more than you" is a saying that comes to mind. There is a vocal / speaking coach I have learned a lot from - Vinh Giang. He has a youtube channel with good content on it. He talks about the pause a lot. just like any other skill, takes practice. Keep at it and you'll get it my friend
me when mofo asks my age (i forgor and now need to subtract the year of birth from the current year)
@@sObad367 🤣🤣
Tell them it just means you are smarter, more respectful, and a better listener then them :D
@@firewolf7108 😆🤣
I don’t know if it’s just me, but I’m an introvert on top of being detached from everything, I barely go out with people or meet my relatives, so I have little to no experiences to share and I end up feeling that I have nothing to talk about, it’s a never ending loophole but hopefully I get over that soon
Throw yourself into your hobbies, and try to find people that help support those hobbies. I feel very safe in environments where someone I'm talking to and I are both knowledgeable on a subject and working towards the same goal. Helped me gain confidence and get practice.
It is very hard to tell stories when there aren't any stories to tell. Would you be ok if you didn't have anything to share when it's all said and done?
I agree with @chloehall628 , find environments that are aligned with you and your interests and start there. That's the easiest place to practice. Keep me posted on your progress, I want to see how it goes!
Appreciate you and your input @chloehall628 , it will definitely help people!
you are not the only one dude that’s exactly how i am. I feel like since i’ve lived no life to begin with, it’s hard to go on and try to seem like a cool person to others especially when they’ve all done so much and I haven’t done anything cool or interesting ever
that's insanely true, when i see people around my age they have infinite more experiences/responsability and knowledge about life that i will ever get so i just got nothing to say at all
@@slapshotjack9806 Im sorry for what youre going through, but I think you are refering to another topic right now. In your case, these friends of yours dont invite you to hangouts but the original comment was talking about being detatched from everything. My advice would be to reconsider this group of friends because if you were actually valued by them, you wouldn't miss a single one of the planed trips and going outs. If i understood well, the problem you have is not general. You just need to be surrounded by people who respect and value you :)
Felt like more of a guide on "how to interview someone", but it was great.
that's a way you could look at it. but a STRATEGIC interview :) appreciate you watching
Dude, youre awesome. Been in my head about communicating (although I'm a extrovert) as I worry about what to say next. Stay blessed!
appreciate you man! you got this. once you understand how conversations are constructed (as weird as it sounds) you can lead it where you want-
That little nugget at the end was fucking golden. Both the responding and leveraging of emotion and the example of flirting. Make the flirting video now. You are the only person I have found online to break it down in a manner that can be applied.
glad you found value here! will add it to the list, have some other projects that are in the works as we speak. appreciate you-
from someone who is really bad from a social standby, just say some random things i mean be yourself and see if people match you, then don't change for someone , keep yourself as yourself
You are one of a kind my friend. Appreciate you and your insight. I’m sure it has helped someone’s perspective!
You are one of a kind my friend. Appreciate you and your insight! I’m sure it has helped someone else-
Only laziness can beat you. Even if your growth is not as fast as other channels, make sure to keep believing and keep posting because i believe in you ❤️
losing to laziness will not happen 🔥 Appreciate you and your comment, made my day!
Usually my only problem is i fear I'll say some creepy shit or something no-one in the world thinks or agrees on except me. And so i might forever ruin any further attempt at conversation with them this way.
reall
I can relate, I used to feel the same too. might be some "out there" nonsense but when you really know yourself and have a good relationship with yourself, that cures that fear.
There have been multiple times in life where I've said a joke I genuinely thought was HILARIOUS to a group. and they looked at me like they heard the dumbest joke ever. Doesn't change how I feel about the joke, I still laughed because it was something I believed in and made me laugh. So why would I change how I feel about it based on someone else's opinion?
Told it again in a different circle and they loved it. No matter what, someone wont like you / your view. As long as it's true to you, one person not liking what you have to say doesnt matter at all. wishing you all the best my friend, appreciate you watching
these are really the most important key advices you gave. can assure that from personal experience
Appreciate you and your feedback! Glad to know it helped in your own experience. All the best-
"because you are human" woke me up.
I'm all for hearing what you need to hear.. but sometimes you need to give yourself some grace. appreciate you watching-
When I tried to ask questions to continue a dialog, it rapidly became boring, just like question bombing.
I really appreciate this man. I am 18 and have literally no friends. I graduated early from highschool and never really connected with anyone. I am heading to college this month. Hope this helps. Thanks again.
Appreciate you my friend glad you found some value here!
Much more coming soon, thanks for watching-
man, you have no idea how much valuable information this has. i dont comment much on videos, but i felt the need to here. i always feel like the only way i can barely attempt to keep conversations going is by either, 1: trying to be funny or sarcastic, which usually doesn’t last long, or 2: talking about how awkward the conversation is, which, at a certain point, gets boring for me to talk about over and over. i never knew how to ask questions about the other person’s topic, but this truly helped me feel more confident in my conversation skills. i didnt realize that you could ask a question more directed at how they feel about the subject. thank you. i will be using this for my future conversations.
Appreciate you my friend and thanks for watching! Glad you found some value here, and more coming tomorrow-
Wishing you all the best on your continued journey
I can't describe how much i needed this.
I went through your channel to find more useful videos like this, which did meet my expectations,
but one thing I didn't except is the amount of subscribers you have, given how great your style, sense of humor and way of explaining things are.
it's simple, really 😁
thanks for your comment, made my day! I'm glad you found some value here, more on the way soon- anything you would like to see a video on in the future?
quite possibly the most underrated video ive watched. value from this was unparalleled 🙌🙌
i'm glad you found value here! appreciate you, next video will be out soon-
I am not going to sleep on bro's channel! 🗣️🔥🔥🔥 I am investing! 🤑🤑🤑
appreciate you watching and glad you got some value! next video in the works, you'll get a lot from it 🔥
Im an extrovert and I still found I sometimes have surprisingly poor convo skills that leave lasting impressions and I really liked the little drawing tidbits during the verbal explanation (especially the constant callback to the subscribe jokes). I'll subscribe because I want to "let you know I've received value from you" to use your exact words. The 3rd layer of responding to an "underlying message" seems a bit difficult to incorporate/understand at the moment, but awesome to see how unaware I was of this
as long as you received value, that is what counts. If needed, focus on the basics before moving on to the underlying messages. Once the basics become natural, the rest is much easier
man you are the first youtuber ever to make subscribe through hinting or asking ever
Gotcha ;) as long as you found value here, that’s what matters
Appreciate you my friend and thanks for watching-
Thanks for this. I'm talking to this girl right now i knew back in high school, and this had some good advice.
takes some practice to master it, so try and use every conversation you have to improve. You got this 💪
@@simplereally. thanks man
The first thing I do is ask the other person if they play genshin, star rail, prosekai, draw, stuff I like etc. If they don’t, then ask them what they do in their free time. Ask more questions about themselves until you find something you both have in common. e.g. you both like reading books or stuff like that
then talk about that hobby
BEST social advice ever oh my god thank you🙏
Glad you found some value here! Next video is out tomorrow, should add to this in life. Appreciate you watching-
you will blow up the real always beats out the fake and your content is some of the best and actually informative I have seen in a hot minute
you leaving this comment is amazing, grateful for you! next video is out on monday, you will love it-
Oh my gosh, I need this. I am a seasonal camp counselor for high schoolers, and I'm 20 and by far the most difficult part of the job is just talking to the students during our "in-between" times, like during our meal times and the times we transition between activities. I was told this year to incorporate our power skills terminology as much as possible, so I took that to a T (being a task-oriented introvert that takes everything too literally), but realized that none of my team was interested in anything I had to say the entire time. In previous years, I did what you said in here and the results were so much better! I will definitely need this preparing for my next camp, so hi future me. And thank you sir for making this so I know how to improve rather than beat myself up, haha.
I’m glad to hear you found some value here! Seems like you already knew what to do, just needed a little reminder. You got this!
Appreciate you caring about how you make an impact in the world too-
Hey, Gumball Waterson's dad, Richard, met his wife and made conversations using the toddler method when they were younger. So this definitely works.
The psyop example to make me subscribing worked ahah. Apart from jokes, really nice video
appreciate you lol and appreciate the feedback! will continue to improve for everyone. next video will be out asap-
For the first part of this video I was zoned out (in my own head). Then he said "you are in your own head" and I realized I was. He is too good
Appreciate you my friend and thanks for watching! Glad you found some value here, and more coming tomorrow-
So I have this coworker who is a bit of an introvert. He isn't the type to start a conversation. I'm also an introvert but I would describe myself as a social introvert. I can make up conversation when I want to.
Well I was feeling a little bored one day so I struck up a conversation with him. We talked about stuff and at one point he mentioned that he likes videogames. I used to spend a lot of my time playing games but for the past two years I have barely played anything. I asked what kind of setup he had and the specs for his computer. The funny thing is that I know nothing about computer parts. Needless to say I didn't understand a word. But I kept it going. I made him do all the talking and asked small questions here and there.
In the end I got to know a lot about him. Pretty cool dude. You really don't even need to know anything about that topic, just use any small piece of information you know.
crazy thing is he probably loved the conversation and left thinking you were a great conversationalist... even though you weren't the one talking lol. Great example man, appreciate you watching and giving your insight. I'm sure it has helped someone else as well-
4:45 Letterman's original response could have been better, but he was on the right track. You can't keep asking questions or turn the spotlight completely on yourself after the 2nd question and ignore what the other person has to say. You should say something that acknowledges what the other person says THEN follow up with another question. So imo this is how the conversation should have gone
- "Where are you from?"
- "Wilmington, Delaware."
- "Ah, I don't know many people from Wilmington. Tell me about the place, what's the thing you like most about Wilmington?"
- "(river)"
- "(river follow up)"
appreciate you watching and giving some feedback and insight! most likely can help someone improve their skills even more.
I thought that high school was gonna give me some hope on getting friends. I guess not. I'm going to college and it's my only hope, but it's probably gonna be me lonely again.
I came cause I'm an introvert 😂 and for Taylor as well
As an extrovert i agree on the content and also i sub consciously follow this methods so yea it's quite accurate
I am an extrovert, I don't know why this was suggested to me 😄
this guy is rly good with his words, can u write my thesis?
since your profile picture made me laugh.. we can talk about writing your thesis lol
@@simplereally. so my plan is simple, lie on my resume, u write a brillinant essasy, and getting into an ivy.
then we take over the world. its fullproof
@@simplereally. and after that, the stars, and the whole galaxy will bend to our will.
fate has brought us here. We can't lose.. and it starts with the ivy league
Never running out of things to say can actually be a bad thing too. Guys specifically think if they make themselves smart and share how much they know or how much they achieved, or their controversial opinions they are going to win their audiences when actually that can backfire. It takes 2 to have a conversation. I don't like people who monologue me just because I am making space for them to be comfortable to share, doesn't mean I am a weak, passive, a pushover, an easy to win impressionable person or anything like that. Do you actually care to build a connection with me or are you just an arrogant show off person who is too deep inside their own arse.
Great tips, thank you🔥🔥
I’m backt to school and integrating well
Let's make it a good year this year! Glad you found some value here-
Appreciate you and and thanks for watching!
Ask question: good, people interest about.
Pause: last 3 words
Emotion
simple as that! practice each of those for awhile and you'll be top 5% communicator in the world. appreciate you watching-
Looks like the tips on the book "Never split the difference"
good book on how the human brain works! few other examples here, but a book I recommend often. Thanks for watching-
4:15
that's, to me, a perfectly good question. the moment he fucked up was not asking a second question. so indeed there's no *very* bad questions, any question can be caught up. just dont ask something out of pocket, really
"where are you from originally?" *answers* "oh i dont know anyone from there!" -> should've been
*answers* "oh do you miss it?" *answers* etc.
nevermind it's in the video
I appreciate you adding some insight! Always a way for someone to better understand a concept.
Let’s make it a good year this year -
I guess my problem is that I’m not very naturally interested in other people… I think I tend to mostly focus on the conversation topic itself instead of what the person thinks about it, like I’ll only take their opinion on it in order to discuss it and compare it to mine…? So if someone’s talking purely about some experience they had I don’t know how to engage with it at all. I think that lack of self confidence also makes me feel like my own experiences aren’t worth enough to communicate, but that’s another thing
is it people in general or people that don't share your interests? if the second, find a group that has shared interests, then you can share experiences for DAYS. Also, I'm not great at talking about things I have no experience, expertise, or confidence in either. So I don't speak about them lol.
Confidence comes through repetition my friend. You can do it, just one rep/ convo at a time
@@simplereally. hmm guess I gotta find people who I find more interesting? Or get better at finding common interests… anyway Thanks for the reply! :)
@@santiagovidal4497kinda similar experience here.. for example, most people in my country love cricket and i don’t.. i’m more interested in badminton.. so i can’t relate to them and enjoy when they’re talking about it n all
but then i realized that it wouldn’t hurt to know the basics of cricket and just to have an idea u know.. the more u know, the better
and if you have no idea about an experience they’re talking about, just show that you’re interested and ask open ended questions.. it’s not like you’re gonna find people who share the same interests as you all the time right.. so just be open minded and act like you care
alsooo most people are supportive than you think so like just talk about your experiences as well.. when doing that.. delivery is the key soo like just dramatize the way you speak..that’s gonna keep them hooked
so uh just go out more and have more experiences and get out of your comfort zone… social skills are like a muscle.. so if you train it well you can improve so much
I’m an extrovert but I’ve recently lost my sense of identity after going through many very emotionally stressful things, it hurts having to relearn how to be myself.
I feel for you my friend, wishing you the best as you build yourself back up again. In one frame, the ability to recreate yourself however you want can be exciting! not always easy, but exciting. Keep me posted on your progress, excited to see what you do-
"you don't always have to know what to say"
Ask questions
pause. Take your time. Take a deep breath.
repeat the last 3 words of what others have said.
Thank you!! This video was really interesting and I think I learnt a lot!! I feel like I don't have problems starting a conversation and just asking questions to get to know the other person, but when it comes to continuing the conversation I lose it haha 😅 It's like the conversation is just me asking questions and the other person answering them, which is really uncomfortable... And when the other person asks me a question to continue the conversation, I just give a really dry answer unintentionally and then regret it. I also feel like it's because I'm afraid I might talk too much and bother the other person. This is why I'm so glad your video covered it up!!! I will try to put your advice to practice and thank you again!!💞💞
I’m glad you found some value here! Try taking one aspect / topic at a time and practicing it.. then you can keep adding other skills.
You got this! Appreciate you-
I think my problem is I zone out of the conversation because whatever they’re saying doesn’t interest me. (Ik it’s rude)
I’m gonna apply these tips to my social interactions now, hopefully it helps with this dilemma 🤷🏻♀️
love from Brazil bro, awesome work, keep rising!
appreciate you! hope it helped and much more coming soon-
the most awkward interaction I’ve had recently was talking to a girl at work. I was asking questions and she was answering them but it felt like I was interviewing her instead of sharing my interests too. I ended her thoughts with oh I was just wondering instead of sharing what my favorite music is or my favorite songs.
sounds like a one sided convo.. hmm might need more context but good news is you survived lol! on to the next one-
Closed ended questions can make a conversation like an interview or interrogation. Use open ended question
@@BigManTing79 give some examples od such questions
And i disagree, its not always OP's responsibility, he was just dealing with awful uninterested/ing person
@@BigManTing79 you know when in a conversation I really don’t think like that I try to flow as much as possible but just as @simplereally said i think i was in my head trying to control it all when it’s a two person thing.
I’m so cooked I need this video to help me
hopefully you found some value here! wishing you the best this year my friend
I just discovered your channel and this video inspired me to become a pretty good constantly improving communicator so I can actually go through this life smoothly, don't ruin it and keep going.
F your haters but I doubt they exist lol (don't make it be the effort reducing parts of your brain ). KEEP GOING
I appreciate you and thanks for your support! I'm glad you found some value here. It's a skill like everything else, and we can all improve. More value coming very soon-
awesome advice man, shame im gonna blank out during my next convo and completely forget it all 😭
You got this! Focus on working on one thing at a time-
I’d also like to add that , for a general rule of conversation especially when you’re meeting someone for the first time, it’s important to not talk too much about yourself. I feel that asking questions about someone and their stories rather than butting in constantly and saying “I remember something like that..” or “that reminds me of..” keeps the conversation solely rooted on that person. At the end of the day people like to feel valued and heard and focusing the conversation on them is a great way to do that combined with the fact that if you’re trying to talk to the opposite sex it is useful in seeming more mysterious and attractive.
great insight added, appreciate you! hopefully it helps someone improve the social skill
let's make it a good year, yeah?
Great video man! I sometimes struggle with conversation because I have a stuttering problem, it's not as bad as it was a couple of years ago but it still happens yk. I try not to think about it too much and just go with the flow of the conversation and ask follow-up questions. I've been getting better at talking with people but it can be quite draining still. Have a good one mate!
Glad to hear about your progress my friend!
Appreciate you and thanks for watching! Glad you found some value here, and more coming tomorrow-
1:13 when you forget you named your own channel "simple, actually" but name the guy you copy lol
appreciate you and thanks for watching!
@@simplereally. :D
An amazing video. Thank you for being so in depth and understanding the POV of an introvert!🙏
Appreciate you and thanks for watching! Glad you found value here
Introverts have to stick together lol. Next video out VERY soon-
I'm gonna try it today with people I know but can't keep a conversation. If it works I come back and subscribe
let me know how it goes! if it worked, great. if not, try to figure out why and make an adjustment.
from there, you are closer to making it work. keep doing that and there is no way you don't improve
i tend to trip over my words and putting together a thoughtful conversational response like some of these examples seems almost out of the question for me. But when I talk about things I'm excited about, I can't shut up.
That’s the key! When positive emotion comes into the conversation it becomes much easier for everyone
Just make sure the other person feels important / included too. Appreciate you watching -
I'd like to point out something, and it's the importance of having a mentor: mimicking and having someone drive you through the process is really helpful but with the rise of social media - video games - porn consumption, the loneliness epidemic and generally speaking more and more people being individualistic I fear we will see a rise of people with very poor social skills in the future. We should have more mentors in society, especially when it comes to flirting, since that shit is very hard to master if you don't practice it IRL.
Thanks for the video, keep it up.
agree with you 1000%! a mentor/coach/etc is a huge asset. The most successful usually have multiple, but people who are just scraping by think it is a silly thing to do
appreciate you my friend and thanks for your input!
the video is nice and i understand fully the whole point but if someone brings up something that a i have in comon or have knowledge on and also talk about it people will just tell me ``no one asked``
I’m not a natural extrovert; I’m very much an introvert, but I got myself a customer service job and I can assure you that regardless of whatever advice you follow, it’s going to feel like hard work to get used to talking to people.
I can keep a conversation going for 40 minutes, and I can talk to people all day, but I still have a social battery that can still run out, and once I’m done, I’m done, stop talking to me.
I agree with you - simple, but not easy! conversations can be exhausting (i'm in sales so after a long day, I'm wiped). it's a mental workout.
Appreciate you watching, hoping you found some value here-
The fact is i can have a great conversation but at some point it gets boring 😊
I personally feel like I can do fine in real life conversations, but how can I have the same effect over text?
LMFAO I'm the absolute opposite! So many things you can do via text - send a link to a website, video, reel, meme...so much harder to do irl
@@pyxn420 you got a point there ngl
@tonyjumpscliffs lot of tools you can use like @pyxn420 said lol- gifs, memes etc. Would have to see some examples, but would focus on the emotion in a convo to move it to the next stage which is usually in person. Then you are good!
@@simplereally. I appreciate your input.
underrated channel
How do you only have 3.77k subs? This video was so good!
appreciate you and that comment! glad you found some value here. Any topic you'd like to see a video on moving forward?
@simplereally. I would like to hear a video about how troublesome is it to date people in our current society. Meeting people is easy. But finding actual good people is challenging. Also not a huge fan of dating apps.. like many other people lol
Me: ehhh whuh?!
So simple yet SO FUCKIN COMPLICATED AHHHH!
We have all felt that haha, remember one step at a time. Can even focus on one aspect at a time. Appreciate you watching, next video is out tomorrow-
I found the solution to social anxiety a few years ago. Whiskey
definitely helps reduce your fear! long term solution? debatable
appreciate you watching my friend, all the best-
@@simplereally. thank you, its just a joke tho...or is it?
Video sparked introvert realization (autism). Socializing drains (emotions, not fun). Exhausting.
appreciate you watching, hopefully you aren't too tired from it lol
I liked this video. Reminded me of Casually Explained. Very insightful stuff too with some nice examples to go along with it as well.
appreciate you watching and glad you got some value from it! next video is out on Monday, you will love it-
it reminds me of this one guy “easy, actually”
@@derpinheimer2993 they’re the same guy
yo your content is so helpful ☺you deserve way more subs imo 👍
appreciate you and thanks for your feedback! glad you found some value, and hoping you find more in the video that is posting tomorrow. should offer a new perspective on life-
Ever consider saying you don't got "nothing to say" in the first place.
Cause everyone experienced this.. So "nothing to say" is technically a topic
conclusion: talk, ask, listen.
by the love of all thats holy dont use 10:50 if you have no indicator that the person likes talking to you. otherwise you'll seem like a creep, or as if you are doubting them
Maybe you can say it nonchalantly... That way you have plausible deniability, and if she presses you about it you can just say you were referring to her actual stamina and that it wasn't meant to be sexual. But yeah, this takes incredible mastery to pull off successfully
Great video, Could you expand on how to speak with people with relatively low communication skills ? I often find myself speaking with reserved people who won't be good at entertaining a conversation even though they are clearly interested in the conversation and in me. How to respond when the answers are always dry ?
do you enjoy those conversations? If not, I try to avoid them - life is too short. If you do, sometimes it just takes a little bit more time for people to open up. vulnerability is a way to do that depending on a convo (if you show it, it makes them feel like they can trust you). depends on the situation / conversation
Moved to Delaware thinking no one knows about it and now I won’t stop hearing about it
😂 phone is using your location to push more Delaware lol
So simple yet effective
glad you found some value here my friend! appreciate you-
You sir just earned yourself a new subscriber
thank you my friend, just glad you found some value here!
let's make it a good year this year, yeah?
My question is how do I start a conversation without feeling awkward. People nowadays would rather die than start a conversation with a person they don’t know?
Isn’t that interesting to think about? If it offers any comfort, most everyone else feels the same (I think it’s funny to think about).
If you are up for a challenge, next time you are at a Starbucks, etc.. after you order, ask the cashier if you can have the drink / meal for free.
Small chance, you might actually get a free meal. Most likely, they will say no. Do that a few times and you will realize that is the worst case scenario of any interaction. And life goes on
I think its really Just fake it till you make it
I have learned a lot from this video! Thank you and keep making moew videos like this!
Subscribed.
Glad you found some value here my friend! More coming soon
Appreciate you and thanks for watching
i'm hanging out with a friend tomorrow so i'll try these tips out and comment an update if I don't forget
Update : tried it and it was actually pretty good advice. I found it difficult to implement ths transition part but i'll try again next time
"how's your stamina?"
I propose we send you our pictures and you do this to us so that we can learn
you know what, i LOVE that idea. think it would be really cool to incorporate
will work on this soon. appreciate you my friend, all the best-
I just watched the whole video again and I have no recollection of my thought process on how my comment is linked to the video 💀@@simplereally.
Still, love ya boo
I liked this video a lot. Common sense advice without a whole lot of bullshit
Appreciate you and your feedback! Glad you found some value here. Next video is out tomorrow, should give a new perspective for you-
Awesome video, I appreciate the effort you put in this, very helpful.
Glad you enjoyed it! appreciate you, much more value coming soon-
I think that the Joe Rogan analogy fails if we're referring to casual every-day convos. He has days, if not weeks to prepare in advance for the people he's going to speak with, that's mainly why he has always something to say, or something that the other person is going to be interested about. Usually one's going to encounter a lot more "failures" in finding something interesting to talk about.
I can’t believe I just got minioned
not sure what you mean my friend?
@@simplereally.@3:00 I got spooked because I was only listening to the audio
Ok so the the basics are:
-Do open questions. Ex: what do u like the most about that place?
- Dont feel the need for a good conversation
-Talk about interestings topics
-respond to same emotion level
-be present at the moment
-be ok with pauses
and practice building the skills! appreciate you watching-
@@simplereally. i am practicing literally rn. In a roblox game with voice chat, but it doesnt matter. Practice is practice. I also practice in real life interactions a lot, but in games it is easier. Cuz u can meet people faster and leave them faster to talk to new people
@@simplereally. i am already confident in real life to talk to anyone. But interacting in games still have it's benefits, even if u are already confident to talk to people irl
Great video simple and down to earth. Most realistic
Appreciate you my friend and thanks for watching! Glad you found some value here, and more coming tomorrow-
When a topic is naturally coming to an end, I've had to learn that there doesn't need to be a smooth transition to the next topic. Does it help if it's smooth? Yeah, but that's better than a really long and awkward pause
there's a lot of different directions you can take from that awkward pause stage...
good news is, most things in life really don't matter. so if the awkward pause stage is the worst thing that can happen you will be fine. my thought process is call the 'elephant in the room' out when it is there - followed by a genuine compliment of the other person. more often than not, the other person feels it too and will get some relief. from there, the the possibilities are endless
thanks for watching and wishing you all the best-
This doesn’t work. You try to relate to people during conversations and they just want to keep talking about themselves. I can only handle so many one sided conversations, I’m done trying.
This is foundational communication skills. Seems like you are wanting to learn about controlling conversations, strategically interrupting, etc.
What do you feel would help you get to the next level?
@@simplereally. I appreciate the reply. No, I’m not trying to control conversations. I’m far too self conscious for that. I’m talking about when there’s a lull in the other person’s story or whatever they’re talking about, and when I pipe in, they seem incredibly disinterested. I know how to politely and respectfully speak to people, but others seem more interested in themselves than actually holding a conversation. I don’t interrupt. I’ll actually gesture to try to get a word in. But I get trampled. Maybe I should just be rude and interrupt, because that seems to be what people do. But I can’t do that. So I’m done trying. If people want my input, they need to ask for it. And in my job, they need my input. They can either ask for it, or keep quiet so I can give it. I get interrupted. Oh well. What the job done? Let me talk.
@@singusbiggle9977 there are few people I feel understand my struggles in my sales career early on but that hits the nail on the head lol. I HAVE BEEN THERE
it honestly depends on what you want out of the conversation. If you want to be liked, continue to let them dominate the conversation. They will feel like you care, and that always tips the probability of a relationship (friend or more) in your favor
If you want to get a sale or speak your mind, you have to find ways to STRATEGICALLY interrupt the conversation.
for example, if someone is telling you their life story.. "I just applied to USC to be a doctor and [xyz]"... and on and on and on. you can interrupt and say, "wait did you just say USC? I have [xyz short statement (true or not) about USC." and you briefly mention it and then say, "wait, we could talk about this forever. what were we talking about? Oh yeah... XYZ" and then you lead the convo where you want
helped me a lot in sales when dealing with people who like to talk about anything and everything while i'm trying to provide for a family lol
Thanks
Surely we will never run out of things to talk about 😉
NEVER
appreciate you my friend, thanks for watching-