RIDE TO HELL: RETRIBUTION (Zero Punctuation)
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- čas přidán 30. 07. 2013
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I think my favourite part of this video is the fact that Yahtzee’s “Everyone make a big deal of media that is absolutely fucking terrible just to mess with corporate suits” plan happened, eight years later, with Morbius
My favourite part of Morbius is where he said "It's Morbin' time" and morbed all over their asses
Morbius wasn’t terrible though.
@@alisonpurgatory85 yeah when morbo blorbo did the thing and wasn’t fucking boring and insufferable for ages in the most mediocre piece of shit movie in 5 minutes was awesome
So much do they put morbius back on the screen
@alisonpurgatory85 how much are you getting paid to say that?
The wedge between Yhatz and The Last of Us being a golf club is brutally funny now.
Because of how Druckmann took an oversized golf club to all the good will people had for him by making TLOU2?
@@trequor no, at random intervals he just turns jokes into reality.
Not as brutal as Abby with that iron.
Hahahhaahaha
This is not the first time he’s brought something to reality
I thought the 1% was the metascore they always put on the cover of boxes.
Oh my fucking sides
*****
***** or how much of the budget they spent on the game. The rest was spent on renting bears to hump and liquidized crystal meth to absorb through their bollocks.
***** Oh, it's all true. If you call the company at 555-hellriding-666 then they'll send you to a voicemail saying"Oh sorry we're fucking bears and shagging liquid powdered drugs through our scrotum. Leave a message to suggest what mammal we touch the genetalia of next." *BEEP*
That's giving them way to much credit.
I legit thought the villain not liking Jake's dad was an over exagration, so I bought the game a played it myself to see for myself. Boy was I wrong.
every now and then I go about my day and think to myself, "you know what? I haven't watched the Ride to Hell: Retribution 1% review in a while. I should go do that."
+orangeapples was thinking the same thing.
This is what I am doing now lol.
"You know what? I'm bored, lets watch Yatzee beat this poor defenceless child"
Hahahaha exactly the same reason why I'm here !!
I have maybe watched each one of these at least twenty times if not more.
ahmento that
"Which I'm just gonna spoil, because fuck you"
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I love this show.
+SAMfromCALGARY he might as well spoil it we're not gonna give someone money for it
I think this may be the first game Yahtzee has told us to buy.
standinstann seriously?
PocketCojiro
There was Arkham Asylum,Portal and XCOM:Enemy Unknown and a couple of old games(ICO ,the original Thief e.g).Technically he didn't told us to buy those games(unlike in this case) he just gave them very good reviews.
And it was for the sake of marketing data no less
maybe psychonauts but that was more him punishing people for not buying it then him telling people to buy it.
Never forget that its to fuck with heads
With its elaborate plot, well-made combat system, lack of bugs, and incredibly good graphics, this is probably the greatest game ever made.
Indeed.
if someone reads these comments and decides to buy the game you'll both rot in hell for it. I'm not saying I hope that happens, I don't. However I just wanted to make you both aware 0:)
mikiessj4 I dont even have a PS3. I was being sarcastic, in case it wasnt obvious
Brian Herman no worries man - I was also being saracastic
-IGN
5:13 I've never heard the concept of so-bad-it's-good explained so perfectly.
What's up Rich Boy?!
It's called COCAINE
This is not "so bad it's good" kind of bad.
This is train wreck kind of bad, you can't just look away.
However Yahtzee described a "freak show" kind of bad, which can also apply to this game.
Am I the only one who finds the combination of that username and the content of the comment to be side-splittingly funny?
Ride to Hell is not a game, it's a circus act
A circus act with a lot of shit and every performer explodes in a bloody mess, but still an act.
And there must be somebody who's into that.
The game WAS originally going to be a sandbox game.
Back when the game was just called "Ride to Hell" without the Retribution part there was a trailer with a dev interview claiming how unique and cool the open world game was going to be.
Then this happened.
Then over half the development team got cut leaving only about 5 people to finish it
The fact that he uses a golf club when talking about a 'wedge' being driven between them is... Hilariously topical now. Oh dear Yahtzee, are you predicting the future yet again?
Dammit, you got there before me :D
Yes Yes Yes
Yus
Wait what? What’s topical about that?
@@doornik1142 Spoiler: Abby kills Joel with a golf club
@@blayer69 Okay. So? It's not as if Yahtzee voiced or animated Abby.
"Fans of The Last of Us, I feel a wedge has been driven between you and I."
*shows a golf club*
Did you just predict the future?
First time? Honestly, this is kind of a regular thing for yahtzee...
@@benjaminc924 that's copmletly normal for british peope.
He does that quite alot... Have you seen his review of paper Mario origami king. It's uncanny.
I wish he hadn't made that President Trump joke back in 2016. I'm honestly getting tired of how right he can be sometimes.
@@benjaminc924
is there a compilation of things he predicted
I came here for two things:
1. To see Yahtzee destroy this game
2. To read the youtube comment section which I knew would be hilarious.
I am not disappointed.
So did I :D
same
Anaf Mujeeb I came to see what he said about the last of us
Some Nerd ooh contrarian, how smart
I feel I should apologise, on behalf of the people of Gateshead, England, that we didn't burn the offices of Eutechnyx down before this could happen.
Cracked Rearview Did you at least do it after the abomination was released.
tanith117 It's too late now.
+JackIntheBoxGaming Who cares?
Soon it will be among games like Superman 64 or ET and people who bought the game cheap will be able to sell it to the shitty game collectors for 100€/$/£/pesos/yen/kwanzas/whatever the fuck I'm talking about
If it was open-world, imagine how much more hilariously bad it would have been.
INCONCEIVABLE!!!
Zach Scarbrough
How bout you just keep you, your caps locks, and your iocaine powder to yourself 'ight?
I was just referencing a movie. Thought it would be funny. Sorry to bother you.
Zach Scarbrough
As was I.... If you couldn't tell the the Iocaine powder part.
***** Is that a reference to Rob Zombie's Halloween?
christ,
that "i am a real game now" bit was so fucking funny.
That 1% is very out of place since you run into entire armies of criminal bikers... and you, a criminal biker, blow up an entire power plant to get past a fence.
Pebkio Nomare Kind of gives you some perspective as to how many bikers there are that are law-abiding, doesn't it?
Good lord... fully clothed sex scenes. Those were perhaps some of the most hilarious failures of this entire monstrosity that has the audacity to be called a game.
"Like Skyrim with Motorcycles"
-IGN
"I'm not sure if this is a game or pure heroine"
-Machinima
"11/10 I jizzed a little at the end. Does anyone have a moist towelette?"
-Gamespot
-_-
I agree with the first Parody Review. Seeing how My PC skyrim handles as well as the Sex scenes in Ride to hell. Broken, unfullfilling and teidous, also CTD every 5 mins cause I don't know.
Pure heroine? What, like Chell or Samus?
That's actually 100 % accurate for IGN, saying "___is Skyrim with _____"
Doesn't matter how shitty or awesome.
Saying Far Cry 3 is Skyrim with Guns is like saying a man attempting to play a guitar with his pubes is Led Zeppelin and the Beatles.
michael shiel-lantry Or like Lorde's album.
Believe it or not, my gaming channel got content ID flagged for 15 seconds of that fucking guitar doodle
The world is filled with injustice. Thinking about it though, it probably took more effort for the creators of the game to flag your channel than for them to create the actual game :P
Michael Kemel No effort was made when flagging that actually, it's an automated program from Google that has a massive bank of copyrighted material, and it scans any videos for that material, and automatically content ID flags it if there's a match. But it has to completely the same. That's why people can get away with it by either zooming the video in a little bit, or speeding up/slowing it down in an editing program before uploading it, because those have to be manually flagged and there are far too many videos to manually sift through for it to be actually worth it.
scott marshall Ok. I was just being a little sarcastic. Thanks for the information though.
Mike Schmitt Didn't ask you to, nor did I even post from my gaming channel. But you're welcome to go fuck yourself if you like.
Rgmekanic I expected nothing less
There's no need to nuke a dead horse.
Except if its Duke, because his game instructs us to Nukem Forever.
It's the only way to be sure.
Can we poke it and count each twitch caused by the shear force behind each whack as "sign of life" and continue to pound on it till it's made as an example of what "spunk gargle wee wee" truly is?...
Brandon Beyerl Most of the youtube comments I see are obvious statements or idiotic.
Occasionally, I'll find one that is genuinely insightful or amusing.
And very rarely, I'll find one like this that makes me question the difference between enigmatic genius and thinly veiled insanity.
I'm a part of the 1% ....
this game has got so much coverage, I wonder if its become successful just from the amount of hate it recieved?
Ah yes, the "Rebecca Black effect".
ChannelFadge Feel free to buy it used. From what I recall, used sales do not generate any profits to the developer. It all goes to the store.
So it's the video game equivalent of _Springtime for Hitler?_
You have no idea how much that prospect scares me.
DeathDealer1997 Ah the "Call of Duty effect"
The very fact that a golf club was used in an analogy with Last of Us makes this almost prophetic.
I wonder if Yahtzee actually wears other hats on top of his fedoras when he goes hunting.
It's a trilby, but close enough.
Closet Brony Tomato, tomato...which ironically is meaningless when you're reading it.
***** There is only one way to pronounce tomato, it's tomato. lulz
Closet Brony Holy cow, I couldn't tell from your picture of Twilight Sparkle or your name that you like MLP!
Hail Princess Trollestia, the greatest of trolls, and may she continue to make 6 children do her dirty work.
Yahtzee wears a trilby; I wear a fedora. (At least in my ZP-style review, I do.)
If they ever make a sequel it should be called "back to hell"
Dont tell it
The 10 year anniversery of this game is upon us
This game grabbed that "Lifetime Achievement Award for Total Abhorrence" for ten solid years and now here at the end of ZP (long live Fully Ramblomatic) it's going to hold it forever. Well done Ride to Heck
"I'm a real game now." ~awkward pause~ "Of course you are Ride to Hell." ~pat pat~ :P
That just kills me. :P
I like the part at the beginning where he kind of admits that he wanted to like Last of Us, but can't get into it. A lot of people take critics and opinions too seriously.
That is because we live in a day in age where people are offended by everything. Hell, you can't say something bad about yourself without offending somebody. :P
Dear God I'm really going to miss this version of the show
Go watch fully ramblomatic, it’s still going.
This is ultimately my favorite Zero Punctuation. It shows off Yahtzee's best humor and sarcasm I've seen anywhere else, and yet it leaves such an impression that I keep coming back here for a good laugh. Never gets old.
to this day both the developer and publisher deny this game's existence
Lightning LJ You should be denied existence for spelling "existence" with an "a".
Coleco correction made
Really? Got a link for that? I genuinely hope so...that sounds hilarious.
Must...Stop binge watching Zero Punctuation while drunk..
Old comment but still, search for the compilations that are like 4 hours each
few days later, the compilations are gone e.e
@@Nakayuki yet they have the entire playlist for ZP for that exact binging need *eyeroll* lolz
Ooh, I’m gonna try that
If you ever figure out how, please let me know.
Oh thats what the 1% means? I thought it refered to the metacritic rating
If that were true it would be 0%
19%, actually.
i thought it was referring to the completion status of the game
(Rimshot)
Can’t be…..that’s too high of a rating.
'It's not a game. It's congealed failure'
Yahtzee - 2013
I come back to this video often
I think 1% is the games' critics score the developers were on average hoping for ;-)
YGS
Truer words have never been spoken.
No, it’s percent of the game the developers finished!
"Game Of The Year."
10/10
-IGN
They really said that???
***** In-terest-ing...
it should be -10/10
"It's Ok."
10/10
-IGN
7.8/10 not enough glitches
There already is a Plan 9 From Outer Space equivalent for games. It's called Deadly Premonition. I guess Ride to Hell would be The Room or Troll 2, but perhaps that's giving it too much credit.
The Room and Troll 2, especially The Room are so bad that in the end they are enjoyable for how bad they are.
Ride to hell in my opinion is just so bad that you can't even enjoy it on that level
Dalton McBleh umm.......I know, Gigli!
Everyone agree's that movie is universally bad,and no one talks about it being so bad it's good.
I guess you could count the Jason freeburg and eric movies.
Corey Momochi Deadly Premonition is an exceptionally interesting story wrapped within a lacklustre game. I know because the coffee told me.
Isn't that right, Zach?
Ben Brown Coffe and sugar are like John Belushi and Dan Akroyd. The Blues Brothers of the tabletop.
gingervampireFTW Wait, Ride To Hell is Troll 2?
"Oh my god, they're riding her to hell! Then they're going to ride me to Hell! OH MY GOOOOOOD!"
You can't even compare this game to Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing. First off, This game was made by an actual game studio and published by a well known company in Deep Silver with a full development schedule and a large team to work on it. Big Rigs was made by 2 guys in the Ukraine and coded in less than 2 weeks. Secondly, Ride to Hell was supposed to be a full retail release, complete with a $60 launch price, Xbox 360/Ps3 versions, preorder system, the whole bit. Big Rigs was supposed to be a bargain bin minigame you see for $5 in jewel cases at the front checkout at Fry's. It's like comparing a Summer Blockbuster to a straight to DVD low budget B movie.
True. A more apt comparison would be something like Sonic 06, since both had ample support with development and were both terribly buggy releases with bad story, frustrating gameplay, etc.
and is a planned trilogy
You're winner, sir.
69/10 "Like Skyrim with Guns" - IGN
It is if you pay them 20p
You know you were right. I got two friends together, we bought this and played over the course of a Sunday and it was hilarious. Having other people to take over and play for a bit helps a lot as the games "gameplay" is awful, and you'd probably go insane if you had to try finish this yourself.
Reminds me of the Pokecapn playthrough of Sonic 06. They only got through that 'cause they had a crew they could pass the control around.
I'm reminded of the ending of this video every time someone mentions that morbius did a second theater release and it flopped again
0:19 The Last of Us and the Gold club... He predicted TLOU2!
Was thinking EXACTLY the same
So basically Bayonetta did in one level what Ride To Hell failed to do in an entire game.
@@sauceyvirg1n910 Bayonetta has a motorcycle level
Now we have Steam Train playing this.
No, the 1% is how much fun there is
More like 0%.
Aaron Mayne well, maybe if you play with friends, like aliens colonial marines.
British Nerd I don't think it had multiplayer.
Aaron Mayne oh. I mean like with friends taking turns
British Nerd oh okay that makes sense.
I thought the 1% was their overall approval rating.
+MaxTheMaximumGamer It's too high to be.
I thought it was how complete the game was
I thought it was the maximum amount of insanity needed to play.
I thought that it represents how much brain power it took to come up with this shit
I thought it was the overall sane individuals that still alive after playing the game.
I was going through piles of old stuff and figuring out what to throw and what to keep when I found this gem of a game. I don't remember ever getting it, but I am soo soo grateful.
I just loved Ride to Hell fucking up "Lie there and don't move."
"I get the feeling this was supposed to be a sandbox at one point."
Turns out, if you go digging, you can find ads for this game going all the way back to the mid 2000s and, yes, they were trying to make a sandbox, but apparently 8 or 9 years was too short a period for them to be able to figure out how to do it.
There's an entertaining let's play of this, which is saved by two things: there are three commentating, and none of them complain about how bad it is, they just cut out the super tedious parts and get on with it with a smile on their face.
The idea of "making this our plan 9 from outer space" is a good one, there's a good conversation to be had on what exactly went wrong with this game.
Who are they?
Is it the Best Friends? (Matt, Pat, Woolie and Liam)
Sailor jizz? Dont you mean sea-men? Badum tss
+Sour Oddity ah why yes its in my dreamcast
+Sour Oddity Sailor Jizz, the slimiest Sailor Scout.
+GoldFoxed Goldfoxgaming Now I want a Zero Punctuation of DC Seaman
+Sour Oddity Goddammit Barb
oooooh, now i get how the Deep Ones came to be...
im a real game now.. BEST QUOTE EVAR
yeah that one got me too lol
0:18 .
Did ... did Yahtzee predict The Last of Us part II?!
You know what Yahtzee should starting review of the legendary bad games (Like Superman 64, Bubsy 3D, Big Rigs, etc.) in any of the stagnant game release weeks
I have not laughed this hard in a long time to you Ben. God dammit. I'm buying this game.
My god I bought this game to review it and legit Im battling with myself to not destroy my 360
Nice advertisement.
SSoH Well once you think about it, isnt this whole video an advertisment? I mean yahtzee tells us to buy the game multiple times in the video
ClassicGamerReviews Nice defense mechanism.
SSoH Nice niceness.
Jesus Christ Nice
Reminds me of Big Rig Racing. That game was a debacle and virtually broken.
virtually?!?! bug rigs is virtually broken?!?! there's no speed limit for reverse, no hit detection, no AI and you can drive a truck up a cliff an it's virtually broken?!
I find it rather fitting that someone has a chance to use the word literally correctly and instead opt to use virtually incorrectly.
I forgot that game lol
***** Because nothing says a bad game like being able to go 1,000,000 Mph in a loaded truck in reverse... In limbo...
It happens guys. Swing and a miss.
I can't wait to see the crappy sequel.
Oh, you can't wai t well too bad cuz dey won't in a non offensive way
Francis Eclevia Can't believe, they're actually planning to make A GODDAMN TRILOGY out of this >_
WiseEndro333 You cant be serious...
Juggernaut889 Watch AngryJoe's review on this game. he mentions the sequels to this game and even shows their upcoming logos.
will hope not too see it people do laugh because o it but that is just it
Warning: Do not eat or drink when watching this because you'll choke on your food and drink considering you will be laughing yourself to death
That wedge is hilarious now 🤣
This is possibly the best zero punctuation I've seen in a quite a while. Good job.
0:21 how ironic to put a golf club there
Im a real game now...
of course you are ride to hell
***** now lets release you. *stuffs corpse in bag. drives to river and throws it in*
hash tag/massivegreatdumpinitsbigboypants
bloodychuckle
*Throws the body bag into a lake in Yellow Stone and then proceeds to make the supervolcano erupt with the help of a Tsar Bomb, which is placed right on top of the bodybag*
That should do it.
Arexion5293 the perfect murder.... no body no evidence no witnesses !!
This cyberpunk review was ahead of its time.
I LOVE the fact that his game exists. I spent HOURS watching one review of it after the other and people just laughing their asses of because it is so bad. Pure entertainment value!
So this is Yahtzee's " ? " of the 2010's pick
which may translate to being the Best & Worst
He gave it the "Zero Punctuation Lifetime Achievement Award For Total Abhorrence" (below the worst game of 2013) and said it would hold that title until Planet of the Apes happened. Thats why it got the question mark.
It's funny how you watch something that you haven't in a while, and realize that that is where you got something from.
I still say "I've got shit to do" in the exact same way as Yahtzee does in this video.
I don't game that often. But I did buy this on Yahtzee's recommendation.
"Timeless"
10/10
- IGN
THUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!
I am pleased by this reference.
It's a shame that the game was delisted on Steam, because I absolutely would love to play it.
It's 9 years later and I just watched Angry Joe shitting on Redfall by comparing it to the worst game he ever played 'Ride To Hell'. Since I have never heard of this game I searched for it and this was the top result. Congratulations Yahtzee, you've made a mark on internet history with this review!
The 1% on the cover is how much effort they put in
It's actually the count of how many sane people survived after playing this piece of shit.
Cameron James i thought it was how much of my brain remained after i lobotomized myself from seeing a lets play of it
5:28 There's punctuation!
I just love it when Yahtzee says "that's the mystery? I assumed that much!" And "I'm serious! You have to see this shit! Where to start!" Omg XD.
This is one of my favourite reviews Yatzee has ever done.
I'm American and I found your accent... lol just kidding, definitely one of the more entertaining reviews of ridr to hell that I've seen thus far. Subscribed at light speed!
So The Last of Us 2 plotline were inspired by The Escapist's review of Ride to Hell: Retribution. Amazing.
I saw one video of zero punctuation, and it was an instant subscribe. I'm nearly dieing of laughter from each video. This one though, did finally end my miserable life, as I found myself on the ground, shaking uncontrollably, and laughing my heart out
The tone he has at "Just to fuck with some heads" still cracks me up, years later. Such a simple thing, but there it is.
Sorry, Yahtzee, but I'm taking Angry Joe's advice and avoiding this game. I'm not justifying its existence by buying it.
can you get the sarcasm?
Jesus Christ...I came from 2020 in an unrelated TLOU video, to see TLOS being mentioned next to the image of a golf club...
First Zero Punctuation vid I've seen... you have my subscription, good sir!
Funny, and sad, how Yathzee mentions the towns and places you can see. The original premise sounded so much better. Travel the open roads on bike as a fresh Nam veteran.
Nope, it's a game that make Aliens: Colonial Marines look like Alien: Isolation.
Darkman9000 now let's not get crazy here, it makes it look more like the force unleashed 2, slightly above average at best
This video never gets old :)
The most glorious fuck-up the gaming industry has ever brought us.
***** Big Rigs.
'Nuff said.
JeromeGid Plumber's don't wear ties?
Masturbating Lettuce Zelda: The Wand of Gamalon?
boykingkilla Crazybus?
Masturbating Lettuce that wasn't a triple a.game though. It was a school project that got put on a genesis cartilage
Absolutely and utterly captivating from start to finish, this game not only plays extremely well, seldom breaking the action for exposition, but it is also a stunning and innovative leap forward in graphics technology, it actually felt like I was speeding down the highway in Texas at 200m/h, and the blood seemed to real that I genuinely felt bad for maiming my AI enemies
I actually saw an ad for this in a game magazine a few years ago. Back then it was, in fact, an open-world biking game.
Yahtzee affiliated golf clubs with TLoU all the way back in 2013.
This review makes me laugh every time I watch!
Aww. I just now discovered this guy, and they art style of this is, SOOOOOOO CUUUUTTTTTEEE!!!! X3
It’s 2021 and I still love this review
Came to watch the game roasted in an eloquent fashion...left satisfied.
"I'm a real game now!"
"...of corse you are."
He pets him on the the head.
Why did I find that adorable?
''responsible mullet owner''
first laugh of the review
Years later the first laugh is now the picture of a golf club mentioned alongside “The Last of Us”. XD
I keep coming back to this video. Still gets a laugh out of me
@fabRic_jAck reply notif so you come back
I herby decree Yahtzee has crowned the word "Bumblefuck"
"And that's why I think everyone should buy it"
Excellent.
You know I agree this should be our Plan 9 or The Room.
2:22
Cock-rock tracks
....
liiiiiiiike the zero punctuation theme...?
Sort of, but I suggest you to listen to atleast one of the songs from the soundtrack. It's pretty awful.