common app essay that got me accepted to the ivy league + tips | upenn
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- čas přidán 4. 04. 2020
- common app essay that got me accepted to an ivy league school!
i applied to the university of pennsylvania back in november for early decision and i was lucky enough to get in in december!
hopefully, this video helps you guys in some shape or form. if its good, here's some inspiration. if it's bad, you got yourself a great example of what not to do and maybe it'll show you that you don't need a great essay to get into a great school!
feel free to comment if you want me to read your essay and give you some advice! id be happy to give my 2 cents :)
best of luck!
business inquiries only- haleykang.business@gmail.com
hey guys! im so glad so many of you guys are finding my essay helpful! unfortunately, i decided to stop editing essays sent to me because it's been taking up a lot of my time. i never expected to get so many requests and especially with the school year coming up, i want to focus on enjoying the time i have left up until the fall and getting ready to do my best! hope you guys understand :)
Hi please can I mail you about my essay ?
I have to write for a schorlaship
@@sharonkelvin1673 no
@@edsradio5817 did u read the fuckin comment..
@Kenn Klein bruh this is plagiarism...feel free to do it if u want to get expelled and have a permanent academic dishonesty record :)
Hi friends,
If you are struggling with writing your essays or handling your assignments, I would love to help. I'm a professional freelance writer with a vast knowledge in tackling essays and assignments in general. Feel free to email me at lohanwilliams25@gmail.com if you interested with such a service.
I feel that I'm never going to have that "spark" in my essay. I have no cool achievements and especially with quarantine I have no opportunities. I had so much planned for this year. Re-join track, join the robotics club, get involved in leadership programs, try to create a club with my friends etc. Now, something just as simple as keeping up my grades is difficult. I hate being trapped in this 10 by 11 room
Hey! I hope you're doing better now! My advice is find the one thing that makes you happy and write about it. I don't think colleges are looking for anything spectacular. They're just looking for something authentic. If something has helped you grow into the person you are today- write about it!
oof
Write your essay about this!
@Easton I LOVE YOUR PFP (i hope you're doing better now)
@@pitad2766 Omg hi fellow sk8 fan- tysm!! I actually am doing a lot better now!
I’m a senior rn and I haven’t even started my college applications...
girlllll me too, I started a few weeks ago
to be fair i barely started this time last year haha
It’s ok, i just started sooooo
same
Same here , hella stressed
Your essay was incredible!! It was so refreshing to see your metaphor weaved into the essay throughout. But I'm so nervous I haven't even started yet😭
aw thank youuu. also, it's totally fine, i was in the same boat as you last year
This is by far the best common app essay I have heard and trust me I’ve watched quite a lot of videos lol!
oh my god thanks sm! lol not sure about that but it means alot to hear :'))
That was such a mindboggling transition from making cookies to debating in another country.
girl
my jaws have been dropped
haha thankssss
this was so helpful!! I've been so lost over where to start with my essay and seeing someone who is more "normal" and doesn't have any crazy life experiences was so refreshing, thank you for this video!!
ah that means so much :')
I’m a senior right now and now I’m regretting waiting till now to start writing my essay 😖
lolll it’s okay
Same
Lmao wut. I started today with my deadline in a week 😅
Unless your talkin bout ED
Hi Zoe and friends,
Just read your comment and if in the future you strugge with writing your essays or handling your assignments, I would love to help. I'm a professional freelance writer with a vast knowledge in tackling essays and assignments in general. Feel free to email me at lohanwilliams25@gmail.com if you interested with such a service.
I'm currently a high school senior working on my application. Out of all the common app essays, I liked yours the most. I really liked how you stayed relatable while keeping your essay structure fresh and unique!
EARLY DECISIONS ARE ON NOV 1 AND I HAVENT EVEN FINISHED MY PERSONAL ESSAY.
ITS OKAY I DIDNT HAVE MINE FINISHED BY THEN EITHER
ME TOO AAAAA
Girl same
Same lmaoo
ME NEITHER
loved your essay! i thought that starting off with the puzzles was so cool because it was a literal passion of yours and can be used metaphorically when learning about your own life! :)
thanks! im glad my direction ended up working pretty well. i was really nervous abt it when i was writing it haha
“July before senior year” Me: *stresses bc its December 22nd OF SENIOR YEAR and the deadlines are February 1st*😳
I think you mean Jan 1st 😳
I am in the same situation. I was writing one but it wasn't good. I had to start all over again.
Ps: my deadline is New Years Eve.
@@raquelbueno3697 i just started writing and the deadline is jan 1st 😬
,@@mariakara5167 we are all together
@@Fsanskritisukkal I started two days ago but i deleted everything. The deadline is in a few hours and i have no common app essay
omg your essay is making me sooo nervous! how can someone write sooo good? loads of love! happy to find your channel
ahh thank you so much!!!
what university did you get into?
Girl I don’t even know where to put my commas 😔
rippp
Hi Cinco,
If you are struggling with writing your essays or handling your assignments, I would love to help. I'm a professional freelance writer with a vast knowledge in tackling essays and assignments in general. Feel free to email me at lohanwilliams25@gmail.com if you interested with such a service.
Loved how you stayed raw and real. One of those few essays that never really feels boring even after reading it a couple of times
This is the best essay video I have ever seen and I have been binging these kinds of videos for, well, a long time. Thank you
:') thanks this comment is so nice
I absolutely love the essay and the way you wrote it as it just felt so modest and personal yet flawless and well-crafted.
:')))) thanks sm. this brightened my day so much. dont boost my ego too much though ;)
oof it's july before senior year and i'm trying to start now lol
i just wrote 5 paragraphs of trash that don't really say anything about me so i guess imma move on to topic 2 lol
haha that’s the spirit?
@@haleykang8156 i... guess...? it's so hard to sit down and start writing tho
yeah same lmao. I wrote 2 essays off the top of my head and both were self-pitying trash. but my 3rd essay that I just completed i think is really good.
@@closet7041 omg yay! thanks for the inspiration lol
Don’t fret you’ve got a great start
thank you so much for offering your advice-as someone who has also watched a lot of these college videos, i found it rlly refreshing to hear the perspective of someone more 'normal'. i really like the way your essay conveyed your personality and i got a lot of insight on how i should approach my own essay from this! congrats on upenn and looking forward to your college vlogs :)
thank you so much :') it means a lot to hear. always here to help!
hey! if you're interested, my friends and i started a company called collegae (collegae.weebly.com) that provides affordable college counseling where you can speak to a collegian from schools (we have stanford, uc berkeley, harvard, upenn, princeton, and so much more) for just $20/ half hour! hope this helps:)
Your essay is so amazing, I love everything about it, the word choice creativity and humor can really make me know who you are!! I am writing my common app right now your essay really did give me inspiration to processed with mine:)
aw this made my day :')
thank you so much for sharing! i was having such a difficult time working with ideas that i really didn't care about or didn't feel connected to. when you said you made a list of everything that you would do if you had all the time in the world was something i actually forgot to think about and now i'm coming up with so many good ideas and am feeling so much for confident!! :) and congrats on UPenn!!
I loved the way your essay started! I’m literally writing mine on how watching parks and rec changed me because I have no exciting moments in my life.
oh my god i love it
haley kang thank you :D
You are so articulate, Haley. Like someone else commented, the way your puzzle metaphor was worked into the essay is impressive. Also, you give off a really friendly and humble vibe. Thank you for this video.
aw thank you so muchb
I have been struggling with my personal essay for the whole week, writing at least 3 topics but couldn't find anything that resonates with me. I found your video really helpful. I love your essay so much. I don't find it cliche. Thank you for your video and keep up the great work. ✨
I love your essay! Congratulations on UPenn!
thank you!!!
starting in july is late?? screams oops i better get on it
that was literally me last year
Yikes I'm starting in August 😬
ahah you got this:) alsooo if you're interested, my friends and i started a company called collegae (collegae.weebly.com) that provides affordable college counseling where you can speak to a collegian from schools (we have stanford, uc berkeley, harvard, upenn, princeton, and so much more) for just $20/ half hour! hope this helps:)
@@bethanytong2338 This is an awesome organization and seems very reputable, but I think there should be a bit more information on who is actually reviewing the essay - maybe an about page with the team and their accomplishments.
i started in fucking december lets gooooooooooooooooo
Wow this is by far the best essay I have heard. Thanks. I didn’t even think of writing about my middle school days that meant so much to me and that I still reminisce on 🥰
yay hopefully it helps you figure out your essay!
currently going into senior year and have been working on my essay for when i apply to nyu early decision this fall. this video has given me so much inspiration! thank you so much, and amazing work. congrats on upenn!
:'))) aw thanks so much. means a lot
your attitude is so adorable :)) thank you for considerate advice! it helped me alot
This inspired me to write my first (technically 2nd?) draft of my ps haha. Before, I kind of had a hard time formatting and structuring all my thoughts to write my essay. After hearing yours, it helped me make sense of everything a lot better and now I think I finally have a pretty solid draft. Honestly tysm!!
aw yay im glad you found it helpful :')
What a masterpiece of essay tbh.
thank you thank you lol
This was a truly helpful video. At first, I was worried that I needed a special topic to talk about in my essay. Now I am confident that I can find/choose a topic in my life to explore/expand/explain. Thank you for everything.
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omg this helped me so much! is there a google doc or anything i can read of it, i’d like to show it to my friend that’s also struggling with her common app and how to smoothly lead into the metaphor, you did a great job girl!
I've watched a bunch of videos on tips for the ca essay but yours just resonates with me so much!!
aw thank youuu
Just finished junior year and been brainstorming ideas for a week now. This essay is gonna take forever 😱 (btw ur essay was amazing)
aw thank youuu! good luck and always here to help :)
It's August and apps opened on the first, but its already the fifth and I'm still brainstorming. I want to apply before November for early decision, so I am sweating 👁👄👁
haha don't worry i felt the same way
I also ED'ed to Penn and started brainstorming once I started school lol. You should be okay if you are very motivated~
ME TOO
Bruh, Im literally starting now
Jasmin Tagijeva you’re fine don’t worry most people are starting right now
Your essay was so refreshing💗 I loved it
4:35 What a unique, strong ending 😍 that’s both surprising and insightful!!! Huge cheers for this essay
you are so humble, i appreciate it ❤️
thanks so much haha :))
I just wanna thank you for this video, by far the best video with tips about the Common App Essay I've ever seen! I am also applying for Upenn :)
Tysm for sharing this ! I’ve been having a few ideas for my essay but can’t really develop them. This helped me
yayyy :)))) all i could ask for
After watching some college videos, I’m definitely starting to understand that EC’s and the personal statement seem to be more enticing then simply numbers (SAT/ACT, GPA), even if all these factors remain important. Thanks for sharing this
yay :)
I LOVE YOU OMG AN IDEA SPARKED IN MY HEAD BECAUSE OF THISSS
YES YOU GO!!
Your essay is “*chef’s kiss*” incredible, it’s so out there. I love it! Is there any way you could help me edit with mine, it’s really cringe and I’m so stuck right now.
hi Haley!! thank you so much for all your tips and sharing your essay. it might not feel like it but you're really saving all of us going through applications right now ahaha. I'm trying to get as many people as I can to read my essay, so if you have time to do so, I would love it if you could read through it as well (no pressure, though!! I know you're busy already)
WOW that was one of the best essays i've ever read no surprise you got into upenn!! i wish you the best in the future
aw thanks!!
You’re a huge help and inspiration. Thank you so much!
I LOVE YOUR ANALOGY
Your essay was great.
And thank you for making this video, it helps a lot.
Your essay tips really resonate with me! I start multiple drafts and only get a few sentences in because I feel they are so cringey lol. I have always been a huge procrastinator but maybe this is the one thing I should have started wayyy earlier :((
THIS IS AN AMAZING ESSAY! Congrats on getting into UPenn!
ah thanks!!!
cooking with lydia is amazing and i'm so glad she's getting the respect she deserves
facts!!
ahh your essay was so good thank you for sharing it with us! (also i guessed u were a debater from the way u talked in your common app mistakes vid and im so shook i was actually right HAHA sincerely a fellow debater :')
thank you so much :’))) and yeah haha i was a debater but not a very good one
this really helped a lot, thank you! the end of my junior year is this Friday, so I'm kind of thinking of some topics to write about so I won't be cramming my senior year hehe
hey youre already ahead of me then haha!
Thanks that was really helpful, I’m writing my essay last minute and that really helped 🙏
I’m barely going into my junior year but I already started to brainstorm, I can see why u got into penn congrats ❣️
thanks!! and haha you're already doing wayyy better than i was doing lol
unrelated but you are seriously so pretty your freckles are adorable
your essay was so perfect!
I feel like my life is so normal that I don’t have any hard life experiences to talk about besides some friends moving away but I got over that pretty fast. If I could dig through my memories I’d probably find something but if I was changed by it I didn’t notice what changed me.
i mean i don’t think i’ve hs that much of an interesting life either lol. i don’t think you need a unique life to have a chance. like i literally wrote my essay on liking puzzles
thank you for this!!! july before my senior year and your tips were super helpful :) gonna go write lol
yay!! good luck
Beautiful essay! Loved it :)
aw thanks!
god bless u i hope u get everything good out of life. u deserve the very best.
lol thanks
This video what so helpful for me. I have good grades but no extra curriculum. So the essay part is what’s gonna make me stand out.
Thank you for sharing your essay. It is amazing.
Really liked your approach to the Common App Essay, especially how you created a narrative out of a seemingly small concept!
thanks so much! that was my goal haha
You’re welcome! I was considering applying to a few US Universities myself (for the class of 25) are you still willing to offer some feedback perhaps?
sure no problem! it might take a few days for me to get to it though!
More than ok with me! I’ll actually need a few more days to come up with a proper draft - could I get your email to send it over perhaps?
can you dm me on instagram instead lol.its in the about section of all my videos. i just dont want my email in the comments. not a big deal but ya know
This video was so helpful!! Thank you!
you’re welcome!!!
I got sucked into your channel and I don’t have one regret
hahaaaa thank youuuu
this is amazing omg i learned a lot from this video !! and ure super cute btw 🥺
ah thanks you🥰🥰
THIS IS SO GOOD
THANKS
Great job Haley! I am a mom so I had to laugh when you said you started in July and you felt it was too late. I have a senior and wish I nagged him in July 😂. Wishing you the best in school!
I feel so extremely stupid. I am so late to the entire college application process! It is nearly the end of August and I haven’t even started writing my essay. I had no idea I had to start so early.
So basically I’m not getting into college 😪
Girl you still have time!! Deadline for early action is in November and for regular it’s in January. You got this, good luck💕💕💕💕
Amina In Wonderland thank you! 🥺
ur fine! she said it only actually took her 2 weeks it was just spread out
dude im just starting it today 😭😭
Hunny I just started my common app now in October
Not me writing this five days before the regular decision deadline.
Honestly, I think it's because there was nothing pushing me to do it and everything has just been so... off.
Hi Ashley,
If you are struggling with writing your essays or handling your assignments, I would love to help. I'm a professional freelance writer with a vast knowledge in tackling essays and assignments in general. Feel free to email me at lohanwilliams25@gmail.com if you interested with such a service.
awesome. So many are...not awesome. Your essay was awesome. Even the mix of diff sized sentences "...I took a nap" held on to me. The figures of speech, the sounds you used and the central idea...the moment. The moment. Good job! The goal: write something, do many (8?) drafts, yes, follow some rules, yes, show it to someone you trust for help, BUT take the risk. ?Then, you'll be soooo attached to and protective of it, it'll be undeniable. Like, "If they don't like it, I don't like THEM!" :) People: if you go somewhere, to a place you really were, you can take us there too. And we will be moved. About puzzle pieces. Which you thought nothing of until this.
I have two weeks to turn in an essay that I haven't even started..... Your videos are helping a lot though so thank you!!!
Hi Aaliyah,
If you are struggling with writing your essays or handling your assignments, I would love to help. I'm a professional freelance writer with a vast knowledge in tackling essays and assignments in general. Feel free to email me at lohanwilliams25@gmail.com if you interested with such a service.
hey i loved your essay and i was wondering when do you add descriptive words (that are more specific and show passion)
Ty for the video. I kind of get now how I could structure my essay
This helps so much!!
yayyyy
Oh my gosh that was so good!!
haha thanks!
very helpful, i def needed this
glad it helped :)
Loved the vid!!
I have just started the essay process and was wondering if I could share my essay with you. Your essay and tips were amazing and I was wondering if you could give me some advice?
this is probably the best college essay i've ever heard! also, do you still read essays and give advice? i've written a rough draft but i'm not sure if the topic is good!
@@haleykang8156 thank you so much! i just shared mine!
Would it be too much to write an essay on how much you love the topic that you are applying for (as your major)? For example, if you apply for film, you need to submit a short film and other supplemental materials. Would an essay on film be too repetitive?
Wow!!! beautiful masterpiece. My essay will never be anything like this.
안녕하세요. 현재 중국에서 국제학교 재학중인 Senior 입니다. 한국을 메인으로 생각하고 있고 미국 대학을 한 2-3개만 쓸까 생각중인데 늦었을까요?
i haven’t even started junior year but i’m alr thinking of essay ideas. i’m also nervous that if i have my teachers read mine they’ll hate it lol. but i love penn so i’m hoping i’ll get in!
your essay was amazing btw!!
haha you’re on top of your game. also don’t be afraid to show teachers your essay! it’s definitely scary before you give it to them but trust me, they don’t judge and just want to help you out. it’s just like revising an essay for school. gl:))
haley kang thank you!
Well written essay, I’m a rising senior in high school and was wondering if you could look over my college essay and make any suggestions
Im so stressed I haven't got my essay together and its already the end of October :( I am in such a funk I just can't seem to express myself
Sameee 🤦🏻♂️
:( hope it went okay
Hey!!! I loved your essay and I wrote one with the same prompt because I had an idea that didn’t quite fit any of the other prompts lol. UPenn is my dream school and I was wondering if you had anytime to look over mine and give me some tips. It would mean a lot!!
Literally a perfect essay
:o
Ngl I would love for you to read my essay bc I want to get into a good school in my state but sat is the most standard score ever
It’s decent enough to get into simple universities but I want to be able to get into the big one , also your video was definitely informative!
yo the essay is soo good wth
:D thank youu
shes so pretty omg
this is so helpful! thank you so much, but im kinda confused how to apply for the scholarships?
Hey, I remember hearing that you saying you spend less than 6k for a year? Was there any steps that you took besides applying for the regular degular financial aid stuff?
Y'all early deadline is in 3 days and I haven't started any of my essays... AND IM DOING THEM ALL EARLY ACTION. God help me, I have 7 college apps due
shittt.. hope it went well!!!
@@haleykang8156 it was better than I was expecting lmao, and stayed true to my writing essays the day of. I didn’t start my common app until November 1st 🥲
actually so helpful
thanks! :)
Do you have any of your original drafts? I think it would be interesting to see the progression from the beginning to the final draft!
ooh thats a cool idea!
me a senior, laying in bed, watching this video, not starting my essay yet 😭😭😭
one week til deadlines and here we are😭
i hope it went welll