THIS Is Why You Don't Buy A House With Someone You're Not Married To!

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  • čas přidán 30. 04. 2021
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Komentáře • 877

  • @iPLAYtheSTATION
    @iPLAYtheSTATION Před 3 lety +754

    People playing house is what keeps people like Judge Judy in business.

    • @amazinglats6020
      @amazinglats6020 Před 3 lety +75

      People playing marriage is what keeps family court in business.

    • @Lon1001
      @Lon1001 Před 3 lety +15

      @@amazinglats6020 no, people feeling coerced and rushed into marriages (half of which are guaranteed to end regardless of faith) is what keeps family courts in business.

    • @tabithamcmahan567
      @tabithamcmahan567 Před 3 lety +12

      @@Lon1001 that is completely untrue. First of all no one is coursed into marriage it is a decision someone makes. You have a right to not marry a person. Playing house and acting like you are married is wrong and is called fornication. Marriages end because people choose to end marriages, it is not the fault of faith. In fact if husbands and wives filled the biblical pattern for marriage divorce would be extinct. Think about it. In Eph. Husbands are commanded to love their wives as their own body. If a man is loving his wife as his own body with a love that is self sacrificial then a wife will respect or submit to her husband. Their is nothing wrong with Gods commandments on marriage it is a problem with humans. It is because of sin.

    • @therocinante3443
      @therocinante3443 Před 3 lety +1

      Lol this is a great comment

    • @tabithamcmahan567
      @tabithamcmahan567 Před 3 lety +2

      @Ton Tom first off you have not given any evidence to back up your claim. You have just made a blanket statement labeling everyone who believes in God insane.

  • @tacooflove6175
    @tacooflove6175 Před 3 lety +504

    Wonder how many ppl watching are telling themselves “well that’s not going to happen to me”

    • @deffectx
      @deffectx Před 3 lety +33

      Basically everyone

    • @privateprivate8366
      @privateprivate8366 Před 3 lety +13

      Definitely not me. That would be like adding more bad luck to what I already have. I can not afford that kind of mistake.

    • @sourpuss5951
      @sourpuss5951 Před 3 lety +6

      I'm watching this because someone I know is trying to do this lol

    • @HenryPaulThe3rd
      @HenryPaulThe3rd Před 3 lety +11

      I plan on buying a house well before getting engaged or married, with only my name on the title.

    • @Lon1001
      @Lon1001 Před 3 lety +3

      "cuz I'm married"

  • @dianneroberts2786
    @dianneroberts2786 Před 3 lety +263

    My niece had a different situation: boyfriend took her house hunting with him to get her input then he bought the house by himself... And proposed to her a few months later and then added her to the title when they married. That was 15 plus years ago and they are still together.

    • @kiaharper7172
      @kiaharper7172 Před 3 lety +20

      That's lovely

    • @iamjamilyn
      @iamjamilyn Před 3 lety +27

      That is the way you do it.

    • @Chris-tg3qy
      @Chris-tg3qy Před 3 lety +19

      I would not enter into any legal contracts with a romantic partner unless I was married. If I had to sign documents in preparation for a wedding/getting married, I would do that as close to the wedding date as possible and keep those obligations to a minimum. There are lots of reasons that this makes sense for me. It’s too easy for people to walk away if there is no legal marriage involved. At least in a divorce, assets and obligations are laid out and a plan is determined about how the assets will be used/divided and obligations taken care of.

    • @nicholasolivas317
      @nicholasolivas317 Před 3 lety +3

      Nice.

    • @AimeePoppinBabies
      @AimeePoppinBabies Před 2 lety +6

      This is what my husband did and we are both on the title. He wanted to show me he will be an amazing provider and when he took me hunting he asked me : "Could you see yourself living here with me?" That's how I knew he was getting serious. I also told him though that if our goal wasn't marriage I was going to move on. He proposed a few months later and said he was always headed in that direction. Actions! 💗

  • @lj2192
    @lj2192 Před 3 lety +548

    If you aren’t committed enough to marry that person, you probably aren’t committed enough to buy a house with that person. Sad.

    • @user-cf7pe3qg1c
      @user-cf7pe3qg1c Před 3 lety +54

      How many fools have babies, buy houses with someone they aren't married to.
      Unreal!

    • @deesee6009
      @deesee6009 Před 3 lety +46

      Plenty of people who regret being legally 'committed' to someone when it's time to split. Having a wedding ceremony is zero security.

    • @chukuemekaoje1015
      @chukuemekaoje1015 Před 3 lety +25

      @@deesee6009 Yes and no. Yes, in that getting married doesn't prevent you from ending up in this situation. But a big NO is that being married to someone gives you more recourse in the event of a split up.
      Plus marriage automatically grants you (and your spouse) benefits that unmarried couples have to actually do a bunch of work to get (and some of them aren't even available).
      Whenever DR or someone says, don't buy a house or join any other assets without being married, it's always relating to what options you have when the relationship ends. For married people, the process for untangling assets is streamlined (divorce). For unmarried couples... welp, not as much.

    • @agathachris9722
      @agathachris9722 Před 3 lety

      Really.

    • @littlebritian2822
      @littlebritian2822 Před 3 lety +2

      Sadly common sense is never common

  • @thatonerandomginger
    @thatonerandomginger Před 3 lety +63

    LOL! That perfectly matched head throwback at 1:30 😂😂

  • @MrMikey1273
    @MrMikey1273 Před 3 lety +76

    This is why when I was in a relationship and not married I maintained my own house and never bought anything like property or vehicles with anyone.

    • @NoNegotiations
      @NoNegotiations Před 3 lety +2

      Thats exactly how I did it. I love my own stuff, even tho I'm with someone.

    • @gethighonlife11
      @gethighonlife11 Před 3 lety +2

      Very good advise, Mr. Parks!

    • @TheSinisterMinister666
      @TheSinisterMinister666 Před rokem +1

      I made the mistake of getting a car for someone (a girlfriend) in my name. Never again!

  • @AO25573
    @AO25573 Před 3 lety +125

    It’s the simultaneous head nod for me 😂

  • @wholesome122
    @wholesome122 Před 3 lety +326

    My friend just bought a house with her boyfriend who doesn’t want to get married 🤦‍♀️

    • @CareerCraft56
      @CareerCraft56 Před 3 lety +68

      This will not go well in the long run... Bad idea👌

    • @hectorm8649
      @hectorm8649 Před 3 lety +20

      @@CareerCraft56 not if they have joint tenancy. Same protection as a married couple.

    • @CareerCraft56
      @CareerCraft56 Před 3 lety +2

      @@hectorm8649 good idea, at least they are both protected 👌

    • @bryandelcid4065
      @bryandelcid4065 Před 3 lety +34

      Tell her to sell and leave and move with someone else till he makes up his mind. Thing is some people think that by moving in with someone that someone will decided “oh ok now we should get married.” That choice should be made before you move in together

    • @deepthinking8633
      @deepthinking8633 Před 3 lety

      Woooow

  • @genxx2724
    @genxx2724 Před 3 lety +323

    Women mistakenly believe that living together is an on-ramp to marriage.

    • @mysticaltyger2009
      @mysticaltyger2009 Před 3 lety +21

      Yeah, and they really need to get over that.

    • @channell11
      @channell11 Před 3 lety +22

      It can be-living together is like a test drive to see if you can put up with someone day-to-day. Unfortunately, the end result is a lot of time you decide that you don't want to sign the papers.

    • @elliotjames1273
      @elliotjames1273 Před 3 lety +32

      People who live together before they get married have a way higher percentage of divorce.

    • @dmitriyk1857
      @dmitriyk1857 Před 3 lety +4

      Women mistakenly believes marriage avoids the problem she had here.

    • @dmitriyk1857
      @dmitriyk1857 Před 3 lety +10

      ​@@elliotjames1273 The types of people who are more likely to live together before marriage are people that will also leave it when they are unhappy in the marriage. I feel bad for the people that follow the old toxic culture of once you get married, you have to stay in that relationship even if you are not happy. The type of people that follow this culture are the same ones that follow the culture of getting married first before moving in.

  • @amorestperpe
    @amorestperpe Před 3 lety +209

    Plot twist her new roommate is her new bf lol. Who she plans on buying a house with 😂🤣😂🤣

    • @itachir8290
      @itachir8290 Před 3 lety +29

      Plot twist to your plot twist: this roommate that she plans on buying a house in the future with is the guy she cheated on her fiance with.

    • @mmc9828
      @mmc9828 Před 3 lety +2

      LOL!!

    • @LuKiSCraft
      @LuKiSCraft Před 3 lety +12

      This is actually most likely true LOL

    • @manisymone8622
      @manisymone8622 Před 3 lety +1

      Lord no!😅

    • @cappy3
      @cappy3 Před 3 lety +1

      @@itachir8290 how does it feel to be right?

  • @blackworldtraveler3711
    @blackworldtraveler3711 Před 3 lety +149

    Never needed to buy a home with anyone.
    I just looked for one and bought it for myself.

    • @goldengalsclazy
      @goldengalsclazy Před 3 lety +20

      Agreed - people are happier when they're independent. They don't hear incessant nagging about who bought what.

    • @alexlopez5800
      @alexlopez5800 Před 3 lety +1

      How did you do it ?

    • @nickwilson3499
      @nickwilson3499 Před 3 lety +1

      @Derek Kotter 🤔 hmmm never thought about it that way.

    • @aolvaar8792
      @aolvaar8792 Před 3 lety +4

      I don't need anyone either to buy a home.
      But if I bought it , I would need to prove that all the funds
      were owned prior to marriage.
      Otherwise co-mingled money in a Community property State
      would make my wife a co-owner.

    • @SC-gp7kt
      @SC-gp7kt Před 3 lety

      Smart 👍

  • @Kyle-xt8ip
    @Kyle-xt8ip Před 3 lety +74

    I know someone who bought a house with her "fiance". I tried to warn her against doing it but she went through with it. They are no longer together and she is stuck.

    • @albertoskytwins3527
      @albertoskytwins3527 Před 3 lety +19

      If they were married they would have to pay a divorce so luckily for them they weren't married

    • @pistachiosandpopcorn7146
      @pistachiosandpopcorn7146 Před 3 lety +3

      @@albertoskytwins3527 True lol

    • @waynemiller6070
      @waynemiller6070 Před 3 lety +8

      How is she stuck?

    • @tazyboy28
      @tazyboy28 Před 3 lety +12

      This comment is stupid. If it were her fiace or husband or boyfriend it still would be the same outcome. Marriage does not change anything, same connection just different titles. Smh

    • @Kyle-xt8ip
      @Kyle-xt8ip Před 3 lety +5

      @@waynemiller6070 he was helping pay and his name was not on the mortgage.

  • @Positiveenergy68
    @Positiveenergy68 Před 3 lety +133

    Oh I co-signed on a car for a friend. Biggest mistake of my life. Glad it’s done and over but I will never help another person in this fashion again! PS, as you can imagine, we are no longer friends

    • @Chris-tg3qy
      @Chris-tg3qy Před 3 lety +11

      I have one rule when it comes to co-signing. I only co-sign for my spouse and children. For my children it’s for the first car only. You have to do whatever feels comfortable for you and I would be comfortable picking up the expense if it was needed.

    • @alextogo8367
      @alextogo8367 Před 3 lety +11

      Yeah you never cosign anything. Kids only exception. Never do money favors for family either. It's for the better.

    • @Chris-tg3qy
      @Chris-tg3qy Před 3 lety +7

      @@alextogo8367 Agreed. Look at the people that asked for your help. Almost always they defaulted on their loans or lease. My kids don’t have to ask. I will help them get that first car. It just needs to be a reasonable cost and reliable. No “friends” driving it either and we will have the talk about responsibility.

    • @Positiveenergy68
      @Positiveenergy68 Před 3 lety +1

      @@alextogo8367 Yup, lesson learned!

    • @tishavee7001
      @tishavee7001 Před 3 lety +8

      I co-signed for my father’s car and I ended up paying $20k after the car was repossessed. Never co-sign for anyone.

  • @susieblanco2722
    @susieblanco2722 Před 3 lety +258

    At least she got money out of it & didn’t take a loss..... split the house and went their ways...

    • @pdxshredder6883
      @pdxshredder6883 Před 3 lety +37

      Yeah honestly I don't see what the problem here was. It would be far worse if they were married and then split up.

    • @matthewgardner2144
      @matthewgardner2144 Před 3 lety +23

      @@pdxshredder6883 Truth! And they saved the cost of the wedding AND the divorce. Whatever perceived 'problem' there was is overblown by DR.

    • @operativeiceman
      @operativeiceman Před 3 lety +8

      @@pdxshredder6883 Facts, whole video is clickbait with no repercussions mentioned.

    • @davem4193
      @davem4193 Před 3 lety +23

      @@pdxshredder6883 agreed, nobody had to lose half their net worth. If anything this proves it's better not to get married.

    • @susieblanco2722
      @susieblanco2722 Před 3 lety +2

      @@pdxshredder6883 yup,,,

  • @haleytruslow7200
    @haleytruslow7200 Před 3 lety +16

    I made the same mistake- what a nightmare that was to deal with. Don’t do it!

  • @Libra8410
    @Libra8410 Před 3 lety +34

    She has such a sweet voice. I wish her well~

  • @avitony35
    @avitony35 Před 3 lety +171

    She got blessed and got out of it without too much of a hassle

    • @forexdinni7838
      @forexdinni7838 Před 3 lety

      W...H...A...T...S...A...P...P
      +...1...4...0,,,5...4,,,0...0,,,2...2,,,2...8

    • @brucefruechte3270
      @brucefruechte3270 Před 3 lety +4

      Thats probably what the guy is telling himself. Everyone wants to take the females side and just assume she was in the right.

    • @arron2lucas
      @arron2lucas Před 3 lety +3

      Wouldn't there be more hassle if they were married getting divorced?

    • @arron2lucas
      @arron2lucas Před 3 lety

      @@MicheleNichols2 that sounds nice in theory... there are folks out here with more divorces than I've had marriages. Marriage in 2021 is just a high stakes relationship.... there are no protections for men in marriage. Women get 100% of the benefits and a severance package when then feel like bailing out... there was a woman who called Dave trying to figure out how to pay bills because her current husband has to pay allomony for the rest of his life to his exwife and they only make 50k house hold income but pay 2500 a month in allomony... that's insane

  • @MrWinnieP
    @MrWinnieP Před 3 lety +66

    1:30 that in-sync nod 😂

  • @jeanlenor1858
    @jeanlenor1858 Před 3 lety +93

    Bad advice by caller: "just make sure this is somebody you are going to spend the rest of your life with". Well, that's what she initially was sure of when she bought that house with him.

    • @Lon1001
      @Lon1001 Před 3 lety +7

      She wasn't necessarily sure she'd be spending the rest of her life with him. I know a lot of unmarried people that bought a house together, knowing there is a real possibility the relationship could end and it made everything so much simpler

    • @ranip7644
      @ranip7644 Před 3 lety +8

      @@michaelpalumbo4880 or just choose your spouse more wisely. Marriage can be a beautiful thing when done correctly.

    • @blackworldtraveler3711
      @blackworldtraveler3711 Před 3 lety +2

      @@ranip7644
      I’ve heard that said by so many divorced people it isn’t funny.
      That’s even said before second marriage.
      Marriages usually always start out wonderful.

    • @rockstarofredondo
      @rockstarofredondo Před 3 lety +2

      Never take advice from a 25 year old.

    • @traceycolvin0504
      @traceycolvin0504 Před 3 lety +1

      Yeah that was bad advice she gave, but she did say get married first.

  • @maukasara808
    @maukasara808 Před 3 lety +35

    Separate account for savings will also keep fraud and weird charges from your debit card.

  • @angelica437
    @angelica437 Před 3 lety +43

    People think that marriage is some sort of symbolic union and it doesn’t really matter. Marriage is a LEGAL CONTRACT it outlines the terms of your finances moving forward. It protects you from ending up without anything if your partner is the sole provider. It gives you RIGHTS. There’s a reason for it and if you’re ready to buy a house together but not tie the knot you need to really sit down and think about whether that’s a good idea or not.

    • @alexeyr9975
      @alexeyr9975 Před 6 měsíci +1

      Absolutely true! I would highly recommend to consult with an attorney before marriage to completely understand the financial consequences.

    • @God-Love-Freedom
      @God-Love-Freedom Před 4 měsíci +2

      Marriage is a symbolic union.

    • @Samuels691
      @Samuels691 Před 2 měsíci

      Huh. Marriage is a symbolic union. It’s prophetic image of Christ and the church,..

  • @BigMoney23223
    @BigMoney23223 Před 3 lety +141

    This show keeps me grounded so much. I always come back every few weeks when I start getting that itch to spend. Thank you dave

  • @SteveOh910
    @SteveOh910 Před 3 lety +54

    What's our motto? Shut up and listen. Otherwise don't call😂😂😂

  • @nicolcacola
    @nicolcacola Před 3 lety +106

    Dave Ramsay's money outlook is based on biblical advice. It works.

    • @Silidons91
      @Silidons91 Před 3 lety +13

      It only works if marriage actually works out. Which, more times than not in the USA, ends in divorce.

    • @veggiedumplinn
      @veggiedumplinn Před 3 lety +14

      the bible also says to stone women who won't marry their r*pists, so your mileage may vary.

    • @superblump87
      @superblump87 Před 3 lety +7

      @General Grievous what does that have to do with the comment you replied to?

    • @BenjesBride
      @BenjesBride Před 3 lety +7

      @@veggiedumplinn That is a false interpretation of Mosaic law. And as Christians, we believe Jesus Christ fulfilled the Law who only commanded that we love one another. Galatians 5:14

    • @RealGalaxyGamers
      @RealGalaxyGamers Před rokem

      @@Silidons91
      %50 of divorce rate is skewed. It’s more like %30 and a lot of factors go into that.

  • @anniesshenanigans3815
    @anniesshenanigans3815 Před 3 lety +70

    same thing happened with a coworker and her fiance. Sudden breakup and selling the house was a disaster.

    • @nicholasolivas317
      @nicholasolivas317 Před 3 lety +13

      I bet someone cheated.

    • @arron2lucas
      @arron2lucas Před 3 lety +2

      Wouldn't divorce compound the disaster?

    • @BlueDauntless
      @BlueDauntless Před 4 měsíci

      @@arron2lucasDepends on the type of disaster. Divorce makes dividing the assets very clear. Shacking up does not.

  • @KS-un3pi
    @KS-un3pi Před 3 lety +17

    My head has wanted to explode when I heard of someone that bought a house with significant other/fiance and share a banking account! Oh heck no! I hope it ends well...but too close for comfort.

  • @damienodonnell1304
    @damienodonnell1304 Před 3 lety +12

    I missed the part as to why you shouldn't buy a house with someone you're not married to?
    This woman walked away with 21k in her back pocket.

    • @ashleesimons981
      @ashleesimons981 Před 3 lety +3

      She’s probably the exception to the rule, not the norm at all. Chances are not good this would happen.

  • @imapiratebtches4403
    @imapiratebtches4403 Před 3 lety +50

    I have an auntie who was with a man who wouldn’t marry her for decades - he kicked her out as soon as the house was paid off.

    • @Lon1001
      @Lon1001 Před 3 lety +14

      If she lived there it was her home and she had every right to stay living there. Sounds like she willingly walked away with nothing, for no reason.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Před 3 lety +11

      My aunt lived with a man for ten years - the end of her childbearing years - and they bought a posh new condo together. They broke up. She bought him out somehow. He married a younger woman, bought a real house, and had three kids.

    • @christianc7420
      @christianc7420 Před 3 lety +5

      Smart man

    • @thefisherman0074
      @thefisherman0074 Před 3 lety +5

      Smart man

    • @rockstarofredondo
      @rockstarofredondo Před 3 lety +7

      This actually happened to a friend of my mother’s. She paid for years on this man’s mortgage and had zero rights to the house when he evicted her.

  • @brianal7143
    @brianal7143 Před 3 lety +55

    A friend of mine and her bf just purchased a very large home together. While they seem very much in love, I just couldn’t understand why they didn’t get married first to solidify their commitment to each other before committing financially 🤷🏾‍♀️.

    • @80sprincess52
      @80sprincess52 Před rokem +2

      It's usually that one of them has one foot out or somebodys was piggybacking on the other financially

  • @mikespain8655
    @mikespain8655 Před 3 lety +30

    Our new neighbors just bought a house and are living together, not married. Making the largest financial commitment in your life, with no real personal commitment. Now that is a bad decision in my opinion.

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Před 3 lety +1

      In the old days, they would have been pariahs.

    • @jillshahrak8957
      @jillshahrak8957 Před 3 lety +10

      How do you know they aren’t committed. You don’t.

    • @lovelytea5764
      @lovelytea5764 Před 3 lety +5

      Marriage seems so over rated nowa days no offense to married people I’d just secure myself with joint tenancy

    • @peters.6343
      @peters.6343 Před 3 lety +2

      @@lovelytea5764 Problem is you can't just sell your half. You have to find that one person that wants to be a co-owner in a property with your ex that even you can't stand! Talk about finding a unicorn!

    • @nielsvandenkieboom5034
      @nielsvandenkieboom5034 Před 3 lety +1

      To be honest I also bought a house with someone I am not married too. However, we have all the legal documents in place including all insurances and our testimonies. So even though we are not married, we are bound by several contracts and are insured for several scenario's from death to handicap to a break-up. It's not that we don't want to marry, but a house came up for sale that was a great deal. We will get married in in a while though.
      It all depends on what you grew up with. Most people I know aren't married but do live together or own homes together. In the Netherlands marriage really isn't that big of a thing anymore as not many people are religious.

  • @noname75013
    @noname75013 Před 3 lety +105

    Dave called him a "goob" but how we know its his fault? How do we know the new roommate is the new boyfriend?

    • @1962pjb
      @1962pjb Před 3 lety +12

      Exactly!

    • @nickwilson3499
      @nickwilson3499 Před 3 lety +35

      Yeah I think Dave is biased for women usually.

    • @davem4193
      @davem4193 Před 3 lety +22

      Simpin' ain't easy

    • @OnyxCurrent
      @OnyxCurrent Před 3 lety +12

      You’re a smart man that’s all I’m going to say

    • @shellyballard8316
      @shellyballard8316 Před 3 lety +4

      Yes! I kept waiting for a “her” or “him” to be dropped. Also, congrats to both the caller & her ex for making bank on the sell of the house! Breakups are a witch, but divorces are worse. Other than answering her basic question, NO other drama was needed to be dug up, Dave💁🏼‍♀️ The girl dun good.

  • @Canute87
    @Canute87 Před 3 lety +17

    So what about the guys who got married and still lost their homes to their spouses?

    • @lloovveellyy742
      @lloovveellyy742 Před 3 lety +1

      They obviously didn't sign a prenuptial. That's their own fault and I dont feel sorry for them.

    • @catherinenelson4162
      @catherinenelson4162 Před 3 lety +3

      Surely you mean to their spouses and children?
      Even if the kids names aren't on the documents, they benefit by having a stable home. No kids?
      Then it's highly unlikely that the judge would split the marital assets in half.

    • @BlueDauntless
      @BlueDauntless Před 4 měsíci

      There is usually a but out. Or a refinance to get someone’s name off the title.

  • @yourgirlshani
    @yourgirlshani Před 3 lety +5

    I couldn't agree more. My husband and I got married prior to moving in with each other and now we have a home. You save yourself a lot of headache and heartache.

  • @LEONACURVES
    @LEONACURVES Před 3 lety +75

    Thank god I watched this video. It was like a message sent from god.

  • @JohnSmith-kr9zw
    @JohnSmith-kr9zw Před 3 lety +30

    If my roommate wanted to “checkin” with me every time they spent more than $300 I would tell them to move back in with their parents!

    • @DirtyPrancing
      @DirtyPrancing Před 3 lety +2

      Yeah, that was weird advice... They also assumed she was jonesing to blow the money when she didn't say that at all

  • @SC-gp7kt
    @SC-gp7kt Před 3 lety +28

    This young lady got off easy, thank goodness. Many times it ends up messy.

  • @skibum6422
    @skibum6422 Před 3 lety +24

    My fiancé wanted to be on my home loan when I bought it. I said no and barely qualified. She's gone and I didn't have to give up my house over it.

    • @SuMMeRFLi5
      @SuMMeRFLi5 Před 3 lety +3

      @Greg B Naww. She wised up, got her own place.

    • @DirtyPrancing
      @DirtyPrancing Před 3 lety +2

      Weird you'd be planning to get married and then be buying a house by yourself right before.

  • @shaneembry7565
    @shaneembry7565 Před 3 lety +93

    Still not as bad a decision as actually getting married.

  • @JustForFun-zg5nz
    @JustForFun-zg5nz Před 3 lety +40

    Married people do this all the time. It’s called divorce.

  • @NYCCamper
    @NYCCamper Před 3 lety +60

    I tell you marriages are keeping lawyers in the money. I love it.💰

    • @gretchenkurz5276
      @gretchenkurz5276 Před 3 lety +1

      You love Lawyers or Money? Ewww. But good for you.

    • @blackworldtraveler3711
      @blackworldtraveler3711 Před 3 lety +1

      Also wedding businesses like planners, flowers, cakes,rental space,courthouse fees,etc..
      And landlords....
      When I did jury duty there were tons of posted available rental apartments,condos,and houses on the information bulletin board near the divorce/child support courtroom areas.

  • @genehoffman1644
    @genehoffman1644 Před 3 lety +3

    Just sold the house. Same exact situation def not making the same mistake again. Now the solo home shopping begins.

  • @mariecalo
    @mariecalo Před 3 lety +19

    Yes! Excellent advice either by yourself or doing it when married.

    • @offgridaussies
      @offgridaussies Před 3 lety +4

      Liz, marriage won't save you. Have you heard the term "messy divorce"?

    • @detailkingz4721
      @detailkingz4721 Před 3 lety

      So you could take 90%,

  • @carolg6598
    @carolg6598 Před 3 lety +7

    I bought a house with my boyfriend (now husband). I know we did it backwards. I don’t regret it for obvious reasons, but please remember, I’m an outlier. It turned out wonderfully in the end for us, but it’s not a smart choice to do it backwards.

  • @Sloimer
    @Sloimer Před 3 lety +22

    What’s wrong with her selling the house and making a profit? Sounds like she saved a ton by not needing to hire a divorce lawyer.

    • @Lon1001
      @Lon1001 Před 3 lety +1

      I think the entire premise of DR perspective is that marriage comes with a better chance of the relationship lasting a lifetime. I'm not sure that's entirely true and holding to that belief creates other complications. Dealing with a house in any relationship is certainly easier if that relationship lasts a lifetime but marital status really has nothing to do with it as much as each spouses' actual commitment to the relationship.

    • @Sloimer
      @Sloimer Před 3 lety

      @@Lon1001 I agree with you

  • @tommybuelens6656
    @tommybuelens6656 Před 3 lety +4

    HAHA the same exact movement on 1:30 got me laughing out loud perfectly in sync HAHA

  • @christofl6523
    @christofl6523 Před 3 lety +12

    She made out better because she wasn't married. Divorce would have tied up her finances possibly for years and if she made the most income in the relationship she may have had to pay alimony. Over 50% of marriages end in divorce. She should buy her own house from here on out.

    • @bryanhempel4764
      @bryanhempel4764 Před 3 lety

      Sadly these days some women do have to pay alimony. The men that go after alimony in a divorce aren’t men and should lose their man card for life.

    • @christofl6523
      @christofl6523 Před 3 lety +2

      @@bryanhempel4764 There's nothing sad about it. Why should men have to pay alimony? If women want equality, they should be all for it.
      The best choice is not to get married at all. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

  • @charlestolley2294
    @charlestolley2294 Před 3 lety +4

    Bahaha love the unison nod when they realize what the situation is!

  • @benb7727
    @benb7727 Před 3 lety +29

    Sounds like a sweetheart. Live a learn. Keep going girl.

  • @geo865833
    @geo865833 Před 3 lety +10

    That mutual head nod was legendary.

  • @83zeus
    @83zeus Před 3 lety +3

    Sounds like she saved money on a divorce lawyer.

  • @nuggetsaurusrex
    @nuggetsaurusrex Před 3 lety +7

    I'd like to know how this is any different than getting a divorce. You're still going to have to divide your assets. I thought this video would explain that.

  • @kathleencooney1518
    @kathleencooney1518 Před 10 měsíci

    I am proud of you for getting out of the relationship with your fiancé. It wasn’t meant to be. Trust me. I married a guy that I knew wasn’t perfect & it lasted 6 months. I wasn’t brave enough to leave. You are smart. ❤

  • @traetonmcglohon4563
    @traetonmcglohon4563 Před 3 lety +7

    He called him a gub but doesn't even know what happened. Smh

    • @alley5869
      @alley5869 Před 3 lety +1

      He is a gub for buying a house with someone he isn't married to lol

  • @Norm475
    @Norm475 Před 3 lety +22

    Marriage has nothing to do with buying a house together. Many men have male business partners and they purchase rental property. The mistake people make is you have to have the proper papers drawn up and make it a business arrangement and not a lover's arrangement. Basically, Dave is saying to women marry the man, and then when you split up you get the whole house and he gets the mortgage.

    • @wandamajette5000
      @wandamajette5000 Před 3 lety +4

      Absolutely. Business transactions take place all the time. However when matters of the heart go sour everything else can be very difficult and unreasonable. Even with regular business partners it can be messy then add a jilted and bitter ex.
      That's a disaster.

    • @rachaelcaskeyart
      @rachaelcaskeyart Před 3 lety +1

      This is the best advice in this situation!

    • @BlueDauntless
      @BlueDauntless Před 4 měsíci

      That’s not how dividing assets work. And that’s not what Dave says at all.

  • @johncameron4194
    @johncameron4194 Před rokem +1

    I know someone who got a house with her boyfriend
    She put the down payment and he tossed her out. His name was on the home.
    Everyone tried to warn her

  • @bigisrick
    @bigisrick Před 3 lety +21

    Pretty sure the engagement got broke off when the guy realized he would have to listen to that voice for the rest of his life

  • @Chelleyshall
    @Chelleyshall Před 3 lety +1

    Ha! Remember when you used the mustard?” 😂😂😂

  • @marietaylor5174
    @marietaylor5174 Před 3 lety +7

    Remember that time you used the mustard? Dave is hilarious!!!

    • @genxx2724
      @genxx2724 Před 3 lety +1

      Those mustard references make me grateful I no longer have roommates. And I haven’t had roommates in 28 years.

  • @tomdrummy4984
    @tomdrummy4984 Před 3 lety +12

    That’s what you call a win win.........that she got out at the right time

  • @philmarsh7723
    @philmarsh7723 Před 3 lety +13

    I agree with Dave but in all due respect, I would go further: Do not buy a house with a spouse unless a prenup addressing these situations is in force.

    • @mmmmmmmm1942
      @mmmmmmmm1942 Před 2 lety +2

      This! My boyfriend and I are coming up with an agreement in case we break up or anything. He gets the house if we break up. We discussed it already lol. You should always plan for the what ifs

  • @johngerring2505
    @johngerring2505 Před 3 lety +32

    25 year old caller: Where should I put this money?
    Dave: How's your relationship with your parents?

    • @MarcyJ2F
      @MarcyJ2F Před 3 lety +1

      This joke is so old and so done

  • @furby3948
    @furby3948 Před 3 lety +11

    I'm going through this right now unfortunately..

    • @offgridaussies
      @offgridaussies Před 3 lety +1

      I feel for you. You're in for a bumpy ride. 😖

    • @LMcBee
      @LMcBee Před 3 lety

      hope things work out x

  • @kennethwers
    @kennethwers Před 3 lety +3

    I bought a HUD repo. It got repo-ed from a unmarried couple.

  • @hank976
    @hank976 Před 3 lety +2

    Why would you get married when over half end in divorce? Would you get on a plane that crashes over half the time!

  • @arron2lucas
    @arron2lucas Před 3 lety +9

    From observation it seems like it was cheaper and quicker to be unmarried in this situation... and she made money....
    If she was married and divorced that's possibly years in court ( lawyer fees and extra trauma

    • @kimmontenegro2258
      @kimmontenegro2258 Před 3 lety +1

      Or they could file for divorce themselves. My divorce cost me $300 in filing fees and parent education classes total. Total divorce time with custody of our six year old was less than a year which is lightning fast based on the courts docket.

    • @BlueDauntless
      @BlueDauntless Před 4 měsíci

      @@kimmontenegro2258It can be quick. If can also be a long process if someone fights it.
      Still not a good reason to play house together.

  • @nrocha137
    @nrocha137 Před 3 lety +18

    Serious question, what is the difference of breaking up while married or breaking up not married? How does getting a divorce easier than splitting and going your separate ways?

    • @a33m3a
      @a33m3a Před 3 lety +9

      If you’re the only person who signed that mortgage but you split the cost, they can pick up and leave and the whole payment is your responsibility because you are not legally married. Also, if they pass away you will own the house with their parents which is not ideal.

    • @arron2lucas
      @arron2lucas Před 3 lety +2

      @@a33m3a with the payment arrangement what's the difference between that and paying rent? So you'd rather pay someone you don't know?

    • @chrisdaviddunn3012
      @chrisdaviddunn3012 Před 3 lety +3

      The laws are different when you're married. You have legal protection.

    • @arron2lucas
      @arron2lucas Před 3 lety +1

      @@chrisdaviddunn3012 legal protections against what?... well I guess she's be getting alimony too... great news for men...

    • @chrisdaviddunn3012
      @chrisdaviddunn3012 Před 3 lety +1

      @@arron2lucas half of the assets obtained while married vs living together.
      I knew of a couple who weren't married bought a house together, then one of them got mad and turned around and married someone else. That took years to untangle that and sell that home.

  • @moewilson4605
    @moewilson4605 Před 3 lety +22

    I bought my first house with my guy when we were not married. Common law is the same in law as marriage when it comes to property. I was 29 and he was 23. It can work out. Married now almost 19 years. (23 years together). I get the warning about not buying a house when not married but nobody knows if it is going to work out or not. If engaged, they certainly thought it was going to be long term.

    • @JustLIkerapunzel
      @JustLIkerapunzel Před 6 měsíci

      Well at least where I live it definately is NOT THE SAME LEGAL SITATUION if you're not married. There are different options but non of them would give you the same rights and responsibilities in Switzerland if you want to huy with someone who is not your husband / wife

  • @rhall772
    @rhall772 Před 3 lety +1

    The only difference is how complicated things become involving the state,once the person makes up their mind they don’t want to be married anymore it’s over. I’m sure majority knows who benefits from divorce.

  • @jenniferp4612
    @jenniferp4612 Před 3 lety +3

    I feel like if she was married it would've been worse. They just sold their property and split it evenly. If they divorced they would have to split assets like cash, home, cars. And they would have to spend money on legal fees.

  • @striperkid
    @striperkid Před rokem +2

    I bought a house in 2020 with my then girlfriend. Timing is what prompted us to buy the house together. Luckily we did at that time because shortly after, the market in that area shot to the moon. We would not be able to afford to purchase that house today. We've since married so, I guess you can say we did it backwards but it worked out for us.

    • @God-Love-Freedom
      @God-Love-Freedom Před 4 měsíci

      Yep. The rare exception is not the formula for success for most people. The boyfriend/girlfriend breakup rate is astronomically higher than the husband/wife breakup rate. Dave still gave good advice

  • @curtisneuman4661
    @curtisneuman4661 Před 3 lety

    Timeless advice!

  • @amandawilson3567
    @amandawilson3567 Před 3 lety +19

    Though I did buy a house with someone who I was engaged to, I had to sell and lost money. It would have been worse if we got married. Don't buy a house if you aren't secure with the person. A marriage doesn't mean it will certainly succeed.

    • @BlueDauntless
      @BlueDauntless Před 4 měsíci

      The point is that legally it is very clear how the asset division takes place. Not so clear when people shack up and it leaves one party open to financial ruin.

    • @ChapterofRomans
      @ChapterofRomans Před 18 dny

      @@BlueDauntlessdivorced leave people in financial ruin. Divorces are messy. People will fight over a toaster in a divorce hearing.

  • @Mrdealornodeal618
    @Mrdealornodeal618 Před rokem +1

    I disagree. Marriages fall apart just like relationships. Certain situations can create less of a headache in separation, however, there are instances where it's worse if you're married.

  • @adaytoremember225
    @adaytoremember225 Před 3 lety +5

    I think it's smarter to buy a house with someone you're not married with, than buying a house to someone you are married with. I hear a lot more horror stories with people splitting up while married.

    • @chrisdaviddunn3012
      @chrisdaviddunn3012 Před 3 lety

      Until the other person runs off and gets married to someone else. I've seen that happen. It took a few years to sell that house. Marriage actually has financial protection vs just living together.

    • @adaytoremember225
      @adaytoremember225 Před 3 lety +1

      @@chrisdaviddunn3012 Financial protection for who? If I'm the bread winner, and am married and buy a house, how am I protected financially?

    • @chrisdaviddunn3012
      @chrisdaviddunn3012 Před 3 lety

      @@adaytoremember225 in a marriage it's always 50/50 split in assets, whereas shacking up, the courts hands are tied. The laws are very different

    • @adaytoremember225
      @adaytoremember225 Před 3 lety

      @@chrisdaviddunn3012 Right...is it always a 50/50 contribution though?

    • @chrisdaviddunn3012
      @chrisdaviddunn3012 Před 3 lety

      @@adaytoremember225 most of the time yes, it depends on the individual state.

  • @corrinafrench7709
    @corrinafrench7709 Před 3 lety +3

    Remember that time you used the mustard..lol 😆

  • @CountrySingerWannabe
    @CountrySingerWannabe Před 3 lety +2

    This girl is smart and Dave and John are short changing her. I don't think she is going to be tempted at all to spend it on frivolous things. She sounds very laid back and doesn't sound like a spender at all.

    • @-MOYST-
      @-MOYST- Před 3 lety +1

      Yeah, she bought a house with someone she’s not married too and then calls to ask how not to spend money. That sound smart? Doesn’t sound like someone that saves more than she spends. People that aren’t spenders don’t worry about blowing what they have.

  • @dmitriyk1857
    @dmitriyk1857 Před 3 lety +8

    Getting married before moving in together is like buying a car before test driving it.

    • @Intellistan
      @Intellistan Před 3 lety +1

      Best comment yet. Unfathomable to marry before knowing how they operate a joint household.

    • @OShawna23
      @OShawna23 Před rokem +3

      Solution -both parties have their own independent property and and one lives with the other -
      If it don’t work move on --if it does great now you both have two investment properties.

  • @millsathn
    @millsathn Před 3 lety +9

    I have a house with my girlfriend. I don’t see the problem. Married people can break up too.. she just happened to break up before signing a piece of paper.

    • @pdxshredder6883
      @pdxshredder6883 Před 3 lety +9

      Well you should still sign a piece of paper when you buy a house with someone, to detail who has what % of ownership and what happens if you split.

  • @mossgeorge2001
    @mossgeorge2001 Před 3 lety +8

    That settles it, I am not getting a house with someone, if they have the house I will help with the mortgage and if I have the house, she can help me with the mortgage.

    • @lynettepettitt655
      @lynettepettitt655 Před 3 lety +2

      Who ever owns the house has the mortgage, and is responsible for maintenance, insurance etc. The other person is a renter or boarder, and shouldn't take on ownership responsibilities. If the owner wants the other person to take on more responsibilities, then they need to be on the loan.

    • @mossgeorge2001
      @mossgeorge2001 Před 3 lety

      @@lynettepettitt655 Good point, by the way does that mean they have no say in things like color of paint or furniture placement.

    • @lynettepettitt655
      @lynettepettitt655 Před 3 lety

      @@mossgeorge2001 depends... The issue with not being a home owner but acting like one is the investment. Personally I think it needs to be balanced between being a couple who make collective decisions & how rights & responsibilities of the owner/tenant stack up without it being a power struggle.
      People also need to understand what the laws in their locality is as many don't distinguish between the mortgage holder & the non-mortgage holder if they're a couple living together. So the person not on the mortgage has legal rights to the property if they choose to pursue legal action.

  • @toddmccool2601
    @toddmccool2601 Před 3 lety +23

    She doesn’t sound too grief stricken.

    • @fitnessd8402
      @fitnessd8402 Před 3 lety +4

      Lol right like who said she’s grieving.

    • @sanafarooq9828
      @sanafarooq9828 Před 3 lety +5

      I on the other hand thought she's trying very hard not to cry in the beginning.

    • @twoeightythreez
      @twoeightythreez Před 3 lety

      @Derek Kotter yep and she herself said that is more money than she has ever had at one time which probably means The old BF was the one who put up the initial funds to buy the house and she got to keep half of the profits. His half obviously was offset by his initial investment.

  • @dchin1564
    @dchin1564 Před rokem +1

    So what exactly are the pros and cons of buying a house unmarried vs married? Because it seems that if you are married or unmarried and you decide to sell the house the transaction and everything is still the same.

  • @justinewhite-hadley3138

    An Oodle Dog 😂🤣 I love you Dr. D!!

  • @alicea5
    @alicea5 Před 3 lety +5

    My siblings need not tell me, I’ll tell them if the things they buying r too unnecessarily-expensive and just not needed. I’m a hot potato.

  • @mmmmmmmm1942
    @mmmmmmmm1942 Před 2 lety +1

    What's the difference between brekaing up and a divorce? Divorce is messier lol. Married doesn't stop a relationship from failing 🤣

  • @alisonklein105
    @alisonklein105 Před 2 měsíci

    Even buying a house with siblings is a fraught process or a parent, because if one person wants to move or needs to, it gets ugly fast.

  • @EdelweisSusie
    @EdelweisSusie Před 2 měsíci +1

    I think part of the equation is that she was only 21 when she and her ex-fiancé bought the house - MUCH too young. I see 17 year old girls walking around with engagement rings on their finger - utterly ridiculous - they’re barely out of school !! So many young women just want ‘a guy’ rather than waiting for ‘THE guy’.

  • @izeilasaldivar9525
    @izeilasaldivar9525 Před 5 měsíci

    I took a huge risk. We were together 7 years. engaged for a year. Purchased a home together, immediately got married 6 months after. People asked me why we rushed it after buying a house. I told them I dont beleive in buying a home with someone you aren't married to. Nothing but bad luck comes with it. I had friends who did that and it was a messy process. I never wanted to end up like them

  • @muzorewi
    @muzorewi Před 3 lety +2

    What exactly was the downside of them not being married in this particular situation?

  • @fadimoghrabi1285
    @fadimoghrabi1285 Před 3 lety +3

    1:33 satisfying moment of Dave Ramsey show

  • @isaiahfloyd3009
    @isaiahfloyd3009 Před 2 lety +1

    Marriage is life insurance for you spouse, Non-Marriage is your legal roommate. Definitely something to think about if this person lies and disappear alot.

  • @gretchenkurz5276
    @gretchenkurz5276 Před 3 lety +4

    She made a clean getaway! Against all odds.

  • @canadiankaren2426
    @canadiankaren2426 Před 3 lety +11

    I would never live with a man I wasn’t married to.

    • @Norm475
      @Norm475 Před 3 lety +2

      How appropriate your name is Karen, stay single Karen, and enjoy your cats.

    • @ddfamf88
      @ddfamf88 Před 3 lety +8

      @@Norm475 - don't be such an a$$ normie

    • @sourpuss5951
      @sourpuss5951 Před 3 lety +3

      @@Norm475 I think you mistook "won't live with someone I'm not married to" with "never want to get married."

    • @Lon1001
      @Lon1001 Před 3 lety +1

      That's a perfectly valid and healthy opinion. But many people are fine with it too and that's also a valid perspective. But dealing with a house and mortgage at the end of a relationship is always messy and complicated whether the spouses or partners are married or not.

    • @matthewgardner2144
      @matthewgardner2144 Před 3 lety +3

      Well dear, then don't. But also don't judge people for making valid life choices that just happen to be different than what you want.

  • @joseph10704
    @joseph10704 Před 3 lety

    I have to say i agree with Dave on this problem u should not buy a house with a person u are not married too even if there your fiancé.NOW if u guys want to rent a place with no lease ok do that right now I'm doing this with my fiancé because sure that's the best thing to start off is a apartment u both split the rent and utilities and u grow as a couple.

  • @brittneydawn2429
    @brittneydawn2429 Před 3 lety +2

    Her voice is so cute 🥺🥺🥺

  • @dylanf4678
    @dylanf4678 Před 3 lety +4

    I always wonder home much of this is old school thinking. In my country the common-law designation brings the same rights/responsibilities as marriage. So if things go south it's the same either way. I guess the advice is that you want to be sure someone is thinking long-term with you but you can have those conversations without marriage and marriage isn't a guarantee because people lie about there intentions and feelings all the time anyway🤷‍♂️

  • @jarrettpierce5626
    @jarrettpierce5626 Před 3 lety +2

    Once Dr Freud started talking about feelings I was done with this call

  • @Olph1
    @Olph1 Před 3 lety +2

    Don’t matter how good they look or how good it is. Don’t play house. Either be all in or keep the living and accounts in the Dutch lane.

  • @itzelr3514
    @itzelr3514 Před 3 lety

    this is a given ! should not be even be doubt about this !

  • @barbieblue3336
    @barbieblue3336 Před 3 lety +3

    The most $ you've had, but you owned a house? Confusing

  • @justinecorrington4106

    Yep, I deliberately lost my card that my money market account card