Love in Japan - Dutch woman with Japanese husband
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- čas přidán 10. 09. 2024
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Story
'Love beyond Frontiers, part 1 - Made in Japan' is the first film of what was to become a three part series. In it, acclaimed film-maker Puck de Leeuw portrays 3 women (one Flemish and two Dutch) who have fallen in love with Japanese men. They decided to follow their lovers to their homes. Yet, Japanese culture and lifestyle puts great strain on their marriages. Each of the women regularly asks herself why she's willing to adapt so entirely to the lifestyle of her husband...
My Japanese mother and father got along very well with my Caucasian wife even before we were married. My mother and father spoke very little English and my wife spoke very little Japanese, but that did not stop them from lifelong friendships with lots of fun and laughter. Neither my mother nor my father would ever even think about putting their daughter-in-law in the regrettable spots you were placed in. We have been married for 52 years with four grown children and four grandchildren.
IM wanting a Japanese husband and move to Japan and live there.
Do your wife and you live in Japan?
I lost my husband when the children were young, as well. It has been 11 years now and it is still very hard. His family abandoned me while he was sick as well. My husband was not Japanese but good old American. I'm sorry to say this but it doesn't get any better. It gets different but not better. My heart reaches out to you.....
Monie Flook What type of in laws did you have? You must have been able to tell what type of people they were beforehand .
My inlaws were dead long before I met my husband. His siblings were spread out throughout the United States but the one brother that lived near was very close, while he was alive. Would come over for supper, etc. This all stopped about 5 minutes after they got their insurance money.When he was sick they didn't want to bother. BUT when he was well, he was of use to them. Strange family to say the least. Two weeks after my husband died, their mother's estate was settled and I guess they didn't want me having my husbands portion, so I never heard from them again.
Monie flook: sorry to hear about that. But you're better off without such people in your life. You deserve better. Stay strong. God bless.
Monie Flook It is not vulgar to film a funeral or the dead person! It is done a lot in certain cultures, as is in my own! It helps to process the death and part of grieving! it is profound!
This story is not really about race, ethnicity, or nationality. It's about people. Some people act this way, regardless of the country of their upbringing. Japanese people are incredible. Who is to say that any of this took place because she is "White" and they are "Japanese." In my experience, the behavior described in the video is incredibly uncharacteristic of Japanese people. They are generally not like that at all. That being said, it was a very sad story.
Nanjing 1937
Japanese people are ruthless
***** Harbin 731
JeromeLeong Mao Zedong 1945-1976
his own personal doctor wrote a book of how he came to hate Mao
your own people have done shit to you that's pretty fucked up
Paul Smith there is an old Japanese custom, from the Showa era and probably before that, where the man sends the loved ones away so they cannot see him die but since he did not send away his wife, it cannot be properly applied here. my best guess is that she was a foreigner and japan is a country that has a majority percentile of purely Japanese people so they might feel something about her not being Japanese and marrying into their family. it also depends what part of the showa era they are adopting their ideas from. Pre-war Showa era was almost like another world when compared to post-war Showa era.
i have the feeling that the family blamed her for his death. like some sort of punishment or some superstitious thing, especially if they were initially against the marriage.
***** actually Japan may be very open to foreign tourist but in everyday life racial segregation is a common thing, in Japan, if you're not Japanese or mixed
Miss Japan is an example
How sad. What a shit family, my partner is Japanese and I'm really close with all of his family. So sad that she has to experience this.
+jocybum I get the feeling that the reason why they're like that is because she's not Japanese. Maybe they feel awkward around her or just really dislike her because of her race. But I could be wrong. Maybe it's not about race at all. Maybe they really are a shitty family.
+jocybum It means they never really accepted her as his bride and as the mother of his children.... which also means they don't accept those children as his. It sad, but that's the reality for her...
I watched this video 10 years ago and it left me very strong impression, feel really sad for her. Their love is so romantic and it is never easy for a woman to take 3 kids herself.
Hope they live good and happy now.
Will definitely watch if there is update video of them.
All the best!
What a horrible ending though; he got sick and died, leaving a couple of kids and the mother to raise them. That's why having kids is NOT a wise choice unless you have lots of money!
Wow, how incredibly sad that this family can't unite. If anything, for the children, do this. People are people. Everyone wants to feel loved and accepted. Take race and culture out of it. We are all human beings.
What do you mean by "people are people"? The Dutch and Japanese are not just people, they are genetically and culturally unique. These two people have very different Y-chromosomal haplogroups and paternal MtDNA signatures. Japanese birthrates are very low and Japanese men are largely uninterested in sex; out of the men who do chose to have sex, they have mixed kids with foreigners. How is this supposed to continue the ancient Yamato bloodline? The ancient Japanese and Germanic ancestors of the Dutch saw life not in terms of the present generation only, but as an ongoing succession of the bloodline: the living were the trustees of a sacred heritage which was their duty to pass on, improved if possible, to their posterity.
+Julius Caesar You are drunk Julius, go home.
Japanese, Dutch or not- love is not limited to or by race. This film delivers only one side of the story, but whether her Japanese family share her perspective or not it shouldn't stop either side from coming together to help one another cope with the loss of a loved one. At that point, wrong or right cease to matter the only thing left is do you really have love for them?
The story is disjointed and incomplete! Not enough info of his illness, etc!
Otherwise, it is warm and heartfelt! They really loved each other! So tragic he died so young! Feel so bad for the family! May God look after them!
I feel so sorry for her...but she seems to be coping so well. She's truly a strong woman.
I am soo sorry for that to happen. Please try to not cry it will make your children cry too, have a good and happy life from now on.
Wow. I want to experience the same thing in the future. I'm afraid that I won't have a good relationship with my boyfriend's parents because of the language and culture barrier. I highly respect the Japanese culture and I hope that in the future people can accept me in Japan. Your situation gives me a lot of hope.
she is really serious wife....... i must respect her as one of japanese.
I respect this lady so much in my heart. You are strong woman.
wish the family could unite so that the children could have a proper childhood
It's sad.
Not knowing the whole story, I have to wonder why the family was so cruel to him and his family.
this is so sad. I teared up a little... :(
Incredible lady! God bless you!
I'm so sorry for your loss. So sad
soo sad, he is a lucky guy to have a wife like her..
I am So sorry for what are you going through, Stay Strong.
I know the Dutch too, they're not like Latins, if that's what you're comparing to. Dutch are much more logical, but that doesn't mean they don't love. They're not hypocrites if that's what you mean by not being "normal".
It is, dont forget that she has been living in Japan since the 80's.
No, that would be Finland. They also have more open and kind people there who would not leave their son/brother and his wife alone in such difficult times.
Damn, why is it that every time I cut onions, my eyes water?
She is not german she comes from Netherlands!
Awww this made me cry T.T
Its sort of true, Asian girls dont give it up, even if you marry them.
Gecondoleerd. Dat verschrikkelijke ziekte heeft my mijn vader gekost. En ik dacht ook misschien is het beter zo, want now heeft hij geen pijn meer. En hoeft hij niet te lijden.
Dat vertel ik me zelf altijd. Tis all fier jaar geleden maar het doet nog steeds pijn.
This may sound harsh but thank god the kids are so small. Cause they don't really get what's going on. It really sucks to lose a parent. And the pijn never go's away. Every time you think of the person pain rears its ugly head DX
no..that all i know
Too bad you need to be registered to that one site in order to watch the full documentary. There are 2 flemish women as well, who have/had similar struggles (based on accent this woman is definitely Dutch)
Society will never treat any race equal and it's a shame to waste all that time and energy. Every country are set in their own ways. I too struggle to understand the other nationality even though I've learnt to respect their ways. I live in their country therefore I need to learn their ways and blend in. But no matter how long I've called this place my home for the past 30 years, Some can still make me feel as if I'm some kind of alien to them and they'll never shrug the issue off.
no my dear, radiation was the therapy. I guess he suffered from cancer and had to go to the hospital to get treated. Some amount of radiation is effective and kills rapidly proliferating cells such as cancer cells.
Damn it. Don't cry. Don't fucking cry.... fuck.
I can't either :-(
Sorry.He wishes your family be happy.
He keeps you watch your happy life.
I am sorry for Dutch woman who didnt get support from husbands family. Sometimes japanese can be cruel and very cold blooded
More pricesly all asian
Lucky Dude!
in what aspect? knowledge?
むずかしいよねぇ。。。
Annie Lennox?
I know it's tempting to criticize the husbands family but please try not to.
Please explain what is 'normal' for you and what is 'not normal' for you and why.
dit doet me best zeer ;-;
what, what year do you live in, 1900
Yeah I'm sure it's all her fault.
Takes two to tango, dude.
This is most painful to watch.
That's all you can say? That is your reaction to someone sharing their story with the world. My question to you is, are you a human being?
I think she is lucky .
you can live most advance country in the world.
how did he died? from radiation? how did it make him sick?
poor lady lost her husband
shes got beautiful happa children'
You are a lovely woman and the Japanese are lucky that you live there.
Let me guess this straight. Based on living in the Netherlands for several years (but not having grown up there, for example) and having watched this five minute video, you conclude this woman is not normal????? That's just stupid and preposterous--not to mention there is nothing in this video to indicate this woman is not 'normal'.
@Mise you're talking non sense, because she made them plus you say that while you're using a picture of you with asians kids .. really ?
this video reminds of a costume the mapuche natives had: bride kidnapping from spaniards females and taking them into mapuche villages as wfes. Had the japanese done that, most of their population would have had more western facials marks
I am Japanese and My husband is American
but he is decent of Dutch, too :)
You must be emotional sick person. Seek treatment please! Dutch people might be "crazy", but they're SINCERE! No, I'm not Dutch, but I know them. He was lucky to have a love like hers, and I feel for her.
Jeetjemina. In d'r trouwjurk lijkt ze net op prinses Beatrix
incredible tragedy!!
i dont know why did you talk about japan though you are Korean-American or Korean in America.
please do not talk about other country, you must talk about your country only.
It's a television show. I don't think we need to discuss that much. Please stop spreading stupidity and sarcasm on youtube right now, we already got too much
Why? LMAO. No, seriously, please give a reason, because I'm curious to hear it.
TOO LATE FOR MARRIAGE
interesting... but i would prefer 20 year old
i like how you think. thats exactly what i would think too and what i DO think about white women mostly who are mostly obsessed with japanese culture you know one of those who go to japan and want to be accepted by japanese people because it gives them some sense of worth and wellbeing i think exactly that that they want to be reverred by another culture so it gives them some sense of self worth
Wat mooi godverdomme
cancer
that's a woman???
You completely missed the point of this documentary and made it all about "white people" entirely by yourself, which is pretty ironic I daresay.
someday we need to stand by ourselves !! we change the constitution and get the military. the constitution should be under Koushitsu Tenpan !! i hope the emperor is the top of Japan !!
yes, 尊王攘夷！！
White mans Worst Nightmare
why?
Th Rre Because white men want asian woman but are still jealous of asian men getting white woman
nah, I think white men's worst nightmare would be black men. I dont know where you're from but here in the US, like most the black men I know date white women that couldn't care less about white men lol.
Nguyen Kha Nope actually Asian men are getting richer and are Intelligent they pose a greater threat to white supremacy
we know the state of what black people everywhere
Sagar Sagar lol I know, but still most white women I know prefer black men over any other races because of their "sexual prowess" lol. Have nothing to do with intelligence and riches.
2 US atomic bombs killed 350,000 innocent people,mainly women and children. the US colonized Japan by creating the new Japanese constitution which can never be changed in the JPN culture. today, US might be enjoying to colonize JPN militarily and politically.
however, our ancestors dont want us to hate people, but to smile. do not hate. thank people.
the cause of our humiliation situation is our CONSTITUTION which US made to govern Japan.
move to change the constitution.
i think the dutch gir is not telling the whole story. i think she was bitchy to the famiy, the husband was probably chonan and she came and fucked up the whole tradition and then she wonders why the family doesn't like her.
gaijin are so fucking stupid in Japan especially. And i used to be one of them but i knew better than to impose my culture to Japanese people, They have their own and it wors perfectly and if i don't like it i should just leave which is what i did and not tried to change it.
she thinks of love as a westerner, in a very egoistic way. Japanese think love is ess important than harmony and one must sacrifice love to preserve harmony, which she obviously didn't. she chose her husband even though she knew it woud mean he would have to give up his family and yet she still blames the family though i am sure this is the family that provided most of the arrangement for the funeral since she obviously can't speak proper japanese.
where i come from we call it the complex of the forest and the tree woodcutter . The forest provides shadow and shelter from the sun even to the woodcutter who destroys it. that is exactly what she reminds me of. and the daughter smiling and sucking on lolipops while covering the body with flowers, how disturbing. the very fact of filming the dead husband and posting it on youtube is such a disgrace and so vulgar. Honestly i think these woman is a little fucked up. and i pity the kids and feel so sorry for the family of the husband who lost their son, twice.
I think you are projecting a lot here.
lol you're so ignorant you dumb shit
@kiyoharal
what a weird way you have at seeing things?
1st you see the guy saying he did date japanese girls but never wanted to marry them,
so his choice, to marry a gaijin
i dont get the feeling shes a bitch at all
why wouldnt they visit their sick son? an its never the childrens fault?
you also judge her saying she doesnt speak japanese
she is talking dutch to the camera, dutch documentary,
but i dont see mentioned she doesnt speak japanese?
in documentary seems she knows some
as seen with the hafu miss japan, japanese people arent accepting halfbreeds very well
even tho they wanna look like them through cosmetic surgery
kiyoharal Whoa! Are you ever insulting and cruel! You do not know her! They obviously loved each other very much! It is tragic that he died!
And nothing vulgar about filming his funeral! Not vulgar in the least! It is called grieving and memories of this difficult time!
You seem very bitter, angry person!
You are attacking her for no reason at all!
This doesnt sound like dutch......
She married him for his kids...
Miso Soup What??
I'm sure they are sad to lost family member. She just don't understood Japanese culture. It seem to me, she is the one disrespect Japanese culture.