I lost three brothers in 9 weeks around last Christmas. My TWIN to leukemia in November, another to suicide 2 days before Christmas, and the third to colon cancer on Jan 3. So I was terrified to watch Ren's song about suicide. But I did anyway, because I am the type of person to face fears, not cringe and hide. Yeah. The man gets it. Only too well, the man gets the pain of others. By speaking with 100% honesty about his own pain.
2004 my son was accidentally shot in the head...I took care of him for 13 yrs when in 2017 he passed away due to the head injury...6 yrs ago today i saw his face for the last time before they closed the casket...His birthday was yesterday so this song really hit fucking hard...Eddie would have loved Ren has much as i do...Muzic has always pulled me thru life good or bad, ups nd downs...Of all the muzic that i have listen to over the yrs, it's been you and Linkin Park that has helped me more than anything else💝 This grandma respects and adores you sir...
You brought the tears back in my eyes. I can´t imagine anything worse, than losing your child. I don´t believe in god, but if I did, I would have prayed for you. I send you my love instead. From Denmark, Lene61/🇩🇰
@@JohnDoe-ds6pr please go easy. Loss is loss, and each of us has a story. This song resonates differently depending on our history. The lady who posted this made it through to now
Ren said this song wasnt originally about Joe, but after his interview with Knox Hill, where he spoke about him and his feelings about it, he sat to finish it and just opened up and the last bit poured out. He wanted to leave it raw, so this is what we got. It's so beautifully done. Thanks for sharing your stories, too.😊
12 years ago, I stood on that same bridge (Menai Bridge), wanting to end the loneliness I felt from hiding my psychosis. Didn't want the stigma of being someone who hears voices and thinking the world is against me. Seconds before jumping, one clear and logic thought stopped me. It told me to let go of my pride and find someone to talk to, no matter how embarrassing it was to me, to admit defeat. You don't lose anything by asking for help, but you do by not asking, by being the ' strong silent' man our culture has taught us to be.
Wow. This is my favorite thing about Ren’s music. He’s giving everyone permission to be open about their struggles. I am deeply impressed with how vulnerable you guys were in this video. Thank you ❤
Ren has clearly stated that he was having those ideations for many years due to his illness. And that when his friend Joe made that decision it affected him in such a way that it actually made him turn away from those thoughts, feeelins/ideations. Having to deal with the aftermath of losing someone made him see how it would potentially effect all the ones in his life that loved him.
Yes - I was thinking about that, too. This song is a pressure release valve for Ren, and a cautionary tale for anyone with s-ideation. His vulnerability allows vulnerability in others. Watching the reaction to this was so beautiful. It shows exactly how Ren’s art affects the world. He’s making us reconnect with ourselves and each other again.
Beautiful, haunting song. Some critics might say that when an artist creates a song like Suic*de, they are being self-indulgent. But as your conversation here shows, so very many people are dealing with the same guilt Ren feels over the loss of his friend. With Ren's talent, he could easily break the code to produce music that will play on the radio. But he wants to do so much more with the gifts he has been given.
@@grimsbytownfan I´ve been thinking the same thing. I have never been on CZcams as much as since I found Ren…and I have never seen so many common words being cut out.. for whom? The more we are tabooing a WORD, the more we will act. Its ridicolous, it cant protect to forbid that kind, like four-letter words and so on. In Denmark we are pretty liberal, so that suic*de is a t*boo w*rd shocked me. Hugs from Denmark 🥰🇩🇰
You’re not “supposed” to say the word suicide, like a true artist and human, Ren has shared his art and pain and breaks that cruel taboo, the chorus “suicide, suicide, suicide”. God bless him
Exactly, a taboo thing. Cruel world, he's trying to rise above it , process and do the right thing. And maybe it will give a to people who have contemplated or experienced such a loss(seems like, many people saying so). Heroic and heartfelt. Best wishes.
It's taboo so who wants to call a help line and add that stigma to all the things they're already piling on themselves? Trying to hide it is counterproductive, seeing the word isn't going to remind anyone it exists, nobody forgets.
I don't know where that even came from. Who said you're not supposed to say suicide or not talk about it? The whole "unalived" bullshit being thrown around on social media needs to go. It takes away from the discussion and almost makes it sound like a joke. TALK ABOUT IT.
I commented on the official video, but I lost my wife to suicide. The one thing I know I need to do, bone soul deep need to do is let go of the guilt I feel for her death. I can't. I can't let it go. It's my penance for living while she didn't. It never stops hurting, it's been thirteen year but it still feels like yesterday.
It’s not your fault. Don’t ever feel like you have to get over something tho, sometimes all you can hope is to keep getting through it. “Grief is just love, with no where to go.”
I'm so sorry for your pain. Having been so close to ending my life several times over particularly dark periods, sometimes even knowing how loved you are and how much you mean to someone doesn't change the turmoil one feels inside that's there constantly and you just want that pain in your soul to stop so much that there's nothing anyone could say or do that would take that pain away. Some of us get to hear the voice that you hear when you loosen the noose on the rope, and some of us don't, or decide, for whatever reason, to ignore it. Please do what you can to let go of that burden you carry. Live On for her, love a joyous life for her. I imagine she would be so sad to think that ending her inner torture caused the beginning of yours and that you'd never be truly free to feel happiness again
I am so sorry you have had to carry that weight. The guilt isn't yours (ours), but I know it is so hard to put down. What I had to learn slowly is that you can carry forgiveness along with the guilt, like twin sisters. And this quote helped a little: "Forgiving yourself is finally giving up all hope of going back in time and getting a different result." You can't go back in time, and therefore you are allowed to go forward.
Dude, I feel you. My best man hung himself in his daughters bedroom 6 months after my wedding. Unlike you, I and his family knew about his mental struggles and tried desperately to get him help. I was there for him as much as I could be, as was his wife. In the case of someone determined to go through with it, you alone cannot possibly change that. You can’t feel bad about it moving forward. It’s NOT your fault and you were helpless to intervene. Trust me, that negative thought will eat you up relentlessly. I know from experience. It’s 30 years ago now and still hurts….. it always will, but at least music like this and the way mental health is approached nowadays means it’s a more positive outlook for their future. Keep the faith brother. 💜
Man, I really feel Don here when he talks about his relationship and the pandemic. I’m glad he opened up about it because sometimes just knowing you’ve been in the same boat as folks can help. The pandemic was a perfect storm for problems that I’m still recovering from. The relationship of the person I expected to spend the rest of my life with ended, I was in a new town where I didn’t know anyone, and then when lockdown happened I couldn’t even have the opportunity to meet new friends by going out. It completely broke me mentally. I just stopped caring about anything and everything. My health, my career, my physique… everything. Things are finally on the upswing. But his story makes me feel better just from not feeling alone in that struggle. I guess that comes from our tribe mentality. And I hope anyone reading this feeling the same can feel that sense of community as well.
I was in the same place - 7 year relationship just ended, lost my stepson and our dog too and was in deep depression (my dark night - months! - of the soul and then there was Lockdown with no "social bubble" nearby and then I got long covid which incapacitated me for 18 months. There were many, many times I nearly gave up and the consequence of it all is I have PTSD now. But I'm glad I heard "the voice that you hear when you loosen the noose on the rope" and life is gradually getting better. On Ren's community channel he's just written that a friend once said to him "don't deny yourself the opportunity to make your life better" and that's really struck a chord with me. I'm glad the Vee back then gave the stronger Vee now this opportunity to make my life better and I'm doing that. I'm glad you and Don and all the other people in the world gave themselves that opportunity
Black Pegasus, I just watched the premier and was stunned. So much pain in experiencing the suicide of a friend. Ren is amazing in this portrayal. We love him. My heart goes out to anyone suffering for any reason. Please seek help; find someone, anyone, to talk too. Ren mentions the tranquility of the water as seen from the location on the bridge. That broke me.
Don killed it on here right after the song giving Black Pegasus a chance to get his legs back under him after he said "I need a minute". Don he may or may not say it to you brother but I can tell you with certainty you carrying the show like that was greatly appreciated. Side bar though, I'm hearing he wrote the last verse after his interview with Knox.
Thank you for being vulnerable with us & yourselves. I think Ren’s gift to the world is showing us all how to be real, to drop our masks both literally & metaphorically. I’ve seen such a shift online since he took off. People are talking to each other with interest & respect. He’s inspiring artists of all types to perhaps try something new or just keep going. It’s magical to watch it all. 💜
It was only when he began talking about the loss of his friend Joe Hughes in recent interviews that he started dealing with the loss and regret. So he went back to this song because it felt incomplete. He recorded the ending and kept it raw and real. I’m so glad he did. Regret can eat away at you, especially if you keep it locked inside. I’m already seeing this song triggering a lot of important discussions. And if nothing else, we need to encourage others and tell people how much they mean to us.
Ren said he had this song completed, final mix and mastering done, but felt it was missing something. It was after his interview with #KnoxHill that he decided to add the final verse and dedicate it to Joe Hughes (R.I.P.) He recorded it as he was writing it, just let it pour out with his real and raw emotion, it's horribly beautiful. Not ashamed to say I shed a tear for anyone who's ever had to deal with losing a loved one to suicide.
I lost my husband at 26, I am 52 now and I am just barely addressing all of the pain that came with his loss. His entire family (aside from our children) committed suicide after he did.. nothing makes you feel abandoned and isolated more than people who say they love you (that was actually his last words) and make a decision as permanent as suicide.
That's so tragic. I do think if those who commit that final act knew that it would affect people so much either they end their lives too or, even if living a part of them dies /their chance at living a full and happy life stops, they likely wouldn't go ahead. The sad thing is (and I know as I've been there too) when you are in that dark place, you don't believe in your own value enough to think it would impact even your loved ones in such a permanently devastating way
My 13 year old son died in 2011. Of kidney failure. I destroy myself every day since with guilt, knowing that if I'd been there, i could have saved him. He was with my sister and my niece that day,,and they did everything they could to save him. The pain at the end of this song is something i know well... RIP Nathaniel,Mommy loves and misses you❤
These conversations are why I love Ren so much! His music has allowed these open, honest & vulnerable conversations to happen around subjects that people find so hard and struggle with on the daily. Especially men. These conversations will help so many and allow them to feel they can reach out. Thank you Ren and BP & Don
I cried my eyes out over "Freckled Angels", but this really got me. Beautiful and haunting. Its so painful to actual hear the pain Ren is going through and rhe guilt he's feeling about arriving at the bridge too late...the what if's and if only's are obvious to me. We all have them. God bless Ren, much love 🙏❤️ and Mr BP and The Don, another wonderful reaction, you two really are great. 🤜🤛
Thank you Don. I feel the same. I am finally finding out who I am again after 3 years of isolation. I was so angry and miserable living in this weird rural town in North Devon in the UK. I never thought I wasn't going to come out of the darkness this time. I've had low times before but it was a few months. This was years but I've finally started to come out of it now thank God. It took a random opportunity that was inspired Ren and Ren inspired me to explore creativity again. I'm now upcycling clothes for a living and making tracksuits. I owe Ren and all of the reaction channels so much. You all helped me on the lonely days and nights. I'm okay now. I mean I still have the ADHD. I'm 44 now and I got very low but after discovering Ren I became inspired and energized. Thanks for opening up Don. I always enjoy your reactions and stories. I also loved the interview. Thanks for doing this channel. It really helps me every day and I look forward to these.
I write about the loss of my soul mate to cancer. I can never reread what I write without breaking down. Ren’s ability to write lyrics so deep, so raw, so gut-wrenchingly real and then to go back an sing them... I could never. Whenever I try and verbally articulate my loss of Jae I lose the ability to breathe. I lose the ability to convey. This video needs to exist, Ren is arriving when he needs to. This all is not a random happening. This is needed.
Nigdy nie jest tak, że mamy tysiące przyjaciół. Zawsze można ich policzyć na palcach jednej ręki. Ja miałem i rozumiem, teraz mam nowego i jestem szczęściarzem. REN po prostu tęskni.
I cried through this whole song and I am sure I am not the only one…at least for me I went through all of those feelings in my head since I was a little girl in a alcoholic household and was sexually abused by one of my parents friends and it was all ignored and so many times felt suicidal. This song in some ways gave me validation for the feelings I had growing up. I am older now and because it was never addressed as a child this song gave me validation for some reason for all of the feelings I have gone through and I cried like a baby.
I didn't cry (it was close though), I did have something happen that I never experienced in a song before. In the darkest saddest moments of my life, holding back, being strong, my throat would close up. It is totally an unconscious physical response due to deep sorrow. My throat closed. Unbelievable
To anyone that is going through it right now. remember... it might not seem like it... but it's gonna get better. Nothing stays forever, everything changes. And this too shall pass. You are loved. Talk to someone if you can, and if you can't that's OK too. just take a minute... and remember. You. Are. Loved.
Ren is so genuine and so pure and so talented that’s he’s really got everyone listening to him to open up and to be able to talk and to ask for help and have the kind of conversations you two just had
Oh boy. What a reaction you two. Much respect to you both for sharing so much. At first, BP, I was worried when you were quiet and processing for so long i wanted to put my hands on your shoulders and say "Its ok, let it out. Breathe.." but then you started talking and opening up and your shoulders dropped a little too. I love your idea that maybe in some way loved ones kind of sacrifice themselves, on a spiritual level, to help save the life or lives of others. My dad commited suicide when I was 10 and whilst i have felt suicidal during some dark months of the soul, the one thing that stopped me was knowing the long term effect it could have on those closest to me. This was kind of backed up by a clairvoyant i went to see once during a period I was contemplating it - she said "Your Dad is saying 'Don't do what I did' " and as she said it, I felt that wave of pain his suicide 25 years before had left me with and realised then that's what I'd leave my mum with. That's the voice that I hear when I "loosen the noose on the rope"
I don't believe there is a word for Ren and his talent and his being. Words just don't seem to explain how amazing his talent is or what an amazing human being is. I hobestly ran out of words for this spectacular human being!
If you've been through it, this song hurts even more. Survivors have the same thoughts, feelings.....beliefs. Could we have done something different.....something MORE. RIP Mom.....you are not forgotten.
I'm so thankful for the conversations this song has started. I feel for both of you for the challenges you face. There's plenty of love for you both here. Thank you for being the real deal.
I'm officially putting my support behind the movement to elect Ren Gill as Ambassador of The Earth Human Collective, to be the representative of the human species when intelligent life inevitably makes their presence known to us. He would be able to honestly convince them that we have our faults, but were generally nice...
The polishing on this track is unbelievable, I think music production wise this is my favourite. I don't know how he pulled off such a raw feel with such a finished production level simultaneously
Nearly at 100k Peg and Don let's f*cking get this my guys. And let us take a moment for this beautiful song and the message. We have all lost close people and they would want us to stay strong and keep going. They will be proud of everything you have and will do. ❤
The only song where you feel this much pain(that I know of) is NF -How Could You Leave Us. Beyond impressive to be able to pour that much raw emotion into a song.
Yeah, that song always gets me in the feels. In the end when he breaks down and can't sing the last verse as planned, and just starts talking and crying... his raw, naked pain, expressed in that specific way, a way Nate doesn't usually show publicly, it's really hard to take.
@@SCash-rl5ee I have unaltered admiration for artists, especially men, considering history, who are true to their self and their emotions and who dare to share their vulnerabily with us. Men were and are still so conditionned to show no emotion at all at the exception of anger. It gives me hope for Men's liberation.
His artistry is beyond the words I have in me. Can’t remember the last time I had the ugly crying 😭 Thank you guys for the authentic reaction and subsequent conversation ❤
Lyrics: Oh I, oh I, oh I've Fallen through the cracks of the night sky A light goes out on the other side Suicide, suicide, suicide Oh I, oh I, oh I'm Treading on the tracks in the night-time It never really felt like the right time Suicide, suicide, suicide I'm so fucking lonely beneath this Narcissistic, can't keep a secret Miscount sheep, I can't sleep, a misfit Some say troubled, but some say sadistic Bruises, my brother, one time or the other My skin felt counterfeit, siliconе, rubber Bruises my sister, skin pop thе blister Dig deep, resist the feeling when it hits you Oh I, oh I, oh I've Fallen through the cracks of the night sky A light goes out on the other side Suicide, suicide, suicide Oh I, oh I, oh I'm Treading on the tracks in the night-time It never really felt like the right time Suicide, suicide, suicide You might also like Money Game, Pt. 2 Ren Area Codes Kali All My Life Lil Durk [Sample] Sick boi, sick boi, bitten by a tick boi I feel like it's not me, it's the world that's sick I'm so fucking washed up and sea sick Masochistic kid with a split lip Six feet deep, I can't eat, I'm nervous Won't stay down 'cause my body purges Useless my mother, can't keep in my supper Skin so pale 'cause my cheeks leak colour Truth is my father, you choose your karma Draw for the sword then drive through the armour Oh I, oh I, oh I've Fallen through the cracks of the night sky A light goes out on the other side Suicide, suicide, suicide Oh I, oh I, oh I'm Treading on the tracks in the night-time It never really felt like the right time Suicide, suicide, suicide Suicide, suicide, suicide Suicide, suicide, suicide Suicide, suicide, suicide Suicide, suicide, suicide It's hard to take off from the ground when your wings are cut Your stomach burns when you're drinking from an empty cup You know the entire ocean came from my tear ducts? I see the world through Fibonacci Sequences and Double Dutch I guess there’s some that’s born lucky, there’s some that’s not I tried to cut away my bitterness - hatchet job I locked my youth in a trunk inside a pick up truck Then dumped the whole thing over the same bridge the night you jumped I think about that sometimes, vividly What it felt like to look down and see tranquility One sudden movement in a world of possibility Only one movement to expose our fragility I fucking miss you and I miss myself I miss thinking that were indestructible as well I miss chilling by the pier cave and kicking back With Callum, Hugo, Sagar, Justin, Stevie and the fuckin' lads I miss missing that, I numbed myself to close the gap I never even call 'em up, the distance is my plaster cast The truth is that the day you jumped my childhood jumped too But I still can’t find the anger, all I find is missing you Man, I miss you With all my rhymes I picture running five minutes quicker, I'm right on time I picture pulling you back over the edge and then we're crying And holding you, my brother and telling you that it's fine That’s not the way that I worked Coz I was late like a jerk There's not a day where I could find a way to break from the hurt Your body missing so we never got to wave to the hearse I hope you're listening I love you man, I miss you absurd Fuck
Hey guys, you're probably not going to read this, but I enjoy your openness about your mental states. However, there is a thing that stood out to me during the last two Ren reactions. Your depression over Covid, and what the goverment can do, everything. 40 year old German here. I used to work in a club with concerts, now at a restaurant. During Covid many of my artist friends felt left alone, because they couldn't do what they used to. I couldn't, restaurant was closed. And yeah, it got all of us thinking. However, I want to share a different perspective. When the restaurant was closed, I helped out on the local ICU during winter of 2020. It was horrible. I was cleaning rooms and beds - every day people died of covid. Every freaking day. When I went into the rooms, protected as well as possible, it was just silence, and the sound of the mashines that make you breath. On christmas day I had to clean 6 beds - which meant 6 people left our earth. And it was just on my station with.. around 10 beds. There where hundreds of beds in the hospital.. Also my best friend is a doctor of virology. He kept me up to date, he knew what was happening, how many people would die if the government did nothing. Also he knew it'd take a few years and we'd be ok again - with vaccines, with human bodies knowing how to react to the new virus. We as humans sure don't care for one another if we're not forced to. If there where concerts like before at that time, without vaccines, each one would have quite certainly killed people. You get it there, you visit your family, someone won't make it. It was the goverments responsibility to get us through that time in my opinion. My 90 year old neighbor would have died. Friends on cancer treatment would have died. Grandparents, parents. There were people out there spreading lies about it. "It's not harmful, just keep everything open" - and this split societies - here in Germany too, but for sure in the U.S... don't be mad about what happened, be mad at those who spread lies and poisoned hearts. Ren, in his condition, would probably not have survived it at that time. And he coulnd't have been safe anywhere if there were no rules, as painful as they where for all of us. Losing jobs, not seeing friends, not being able to do what you love. But sometimes others have to decide for us, since we don't know enough to always act responsible. It was a tough time, but.. there was no way around some of the measures back then. Tens of millions would have died in the U.S. alone if there were no regulations. Friends, family. Someones friends, someones familiy.
Much love & respect to you guys.🙏❤️ Don when you said you lost yourself in the pandemic, oh man that's exactly how I feel...😢 So much pain in this review, in the comments, in the song.🖤🖤🖤 Reach out to those you love, you may just save a life. Don't ask how they are, most people will lie & say fine, remind them of that great night out you had, that chilled out day just hanging out that was perfect & arrange to meet up. Much love 🙏❤️❤️❤️
Ren is a genius, how many can Rap, Sing play multiple instruments, produce, direct videos and do their own marketing, all whilst being so fucking real. That’s before I even get to his versatility. Wow. So impressed
I'm in my 40's and recently opened up to my parents about some trauma in my early age (not from my parents). It is freeing to let it go. This is amazing. Great job Ren and you guys.
56yrs ago "Regret" almost took me out. My brain was stuck in the "if only/what if" world. I regreted everything I said and I did. Regret is vicious, regret is unforgiving. Then in the dark basement, on the edge of taking myself out, I got angry. I decided Regret had to Go! I mentally grabbed Regret, stuffed it into a dark black box that I tied shut with a dark red ribbon. I visualized placing it into a back corner of my head. It took practice. It took time. To grab new regets and stuff them into that box. Eventually I replaced regret with acceptance. Owned my errors, owned decisions. I NEVER play the "what if" game. I make the very best decision I can make at the time I make it. Own the results and take another step forward. Turns out I really like myself, mistakes and all. Turns out I really like everyone I meet, now... mistakes and all. At 68.5yrs old, though life has been hard, at times harsh. I have enjoyed my life so very very much.
Don going into his own life and sharing it in away that relates to our sense of self made this so relatable. Shows the levels and impact music can have for creators and listeners. In a world where being honest with ourselves is a struggle and if you can, sharing those realizations isn’t met with a road map, I commend him for bringing up such a sadly common storyline that is uncommonly talked about publicly as a result of the pandemic (loneliness/change)
I just had missed this live and just watched the entirety. This one truly brought me to tears. I so feel what Ren was expressing as I've been through similar event in my lifetime. Enjoy listening to what you and Don expressed. Part of me I feel recognizes a part of him in this one. 🙏
I really appreciate a hip-hop duo bracing the topic of suicide. The pandemic pushed me into a "I don't need anyone, I can do everything myself!" I've got one good friend I can count on, and they light up my week. I've put a pause on dating, as I was dumped New Years Day by someone I really thought was awesome. I have family trauma (who doesn't), so I rely on that one friendship and the kindness of coworkers. But we will all prevail. There is love in the world if you look hard enough. Thanks again!
You’ve talked about this really well. I don’t think we would have had this if he had been connected to a big company. I’m glad Ren is finding his own way to reach his audience. It’s taken longer but it’s a true connection ❤
Bp.. the thing is you won´t call anyone in that situation, you stop believing. The only thing that stops you is, like Ren sings: i never found the right time. It is hard to see the perspective, that life is sooo short, and death is eternal. Thank you both for doing this reaction video, eventhough it is a tough one to react on. Lots of love for both from Denmark. Lene 61/🇩🇰 🥰🥰🥰
What a beautifully heartbreaking tribute. My sister passed in 2005 10 days before Christmas, frozen in her back garden after drinking the best part of 2 bottles of vodka and lots of pills. She had years of depression and mental episodes that led up to that point. My Dad spent years trying to help her but in the end nothing was enough. It broke our family. We all tried to find ways to make it make sense, wondering what we could have done differently. The truth is, we did everything. Sometimes we hold our own pain so close so as to not inflict it on others, to protect ourselves from judgement. The coroner gave a verdict of death by misadventure and in truth we will never know if it was an accident or intentional. All we could do was hope that after years of pain, she was finally at peace. Take care Ren and anyone out there who is affected by this disease.
In this world of plastic fake emotions designed to sell products, Ren reminds you we are all human and real shit happens and we have to deal with it. Man is a poet.
I love that you are actually brave enough to actually say the title of the song, while many other reactors are scared to get demonetized. I LOVE YOU GUYS.
This episode was fire. You guys just peeled back the onion and gave a brilliantly raw self reflective reaction, inspired by one of most transparent versatile artists… maybe ever.
This was THE best interview. How you sat back and let him talk - this is how an interview should flow. He even promts you on times; "you said that" and you still sit back and let him speak. Beautiful.
Thank you brothers. 🙏🏼 Thank you truly for being honest genuine and vulnerable human beings. Let’s do what we can to hang onto hope and forgive ourselves.
I have watched you for awhile but this is the first conversation where I feel like souls were truly bared. This moment is what matters concerning relationships and healing. I find great value in this conversation. Thankyou.
6:02 I am so glad you mentioned about the robots-AI angle: feeling like you lack all worthy substance, i.e. artificial, is something I know I experienced in the depths of my depression throughout childhood and that this was part an parcel of the lived experience of despising myself every minute of each day in my childhood. Everything from the animated eyes, to the empty and lonely feel of the spaces animated, like in every other video Ren makes perfectly suits communication of the place and experience wrapped into the reality Ren sings about.
Don I'm passing through the same process as you...Be strong man!! I know exactly what you are feeling bro! Big hug from Madeira Island to USA for you guys!
This is something new in music. Seriously cannot sum up how amazing and important Ren is going to be for music. An absolute genius and legend in the making. Truly unbelievable and yet another song that is just on another level. Please stay independent and keep doing as your doing.
Amazing Ren has let us into his life through music, his blogs, his lives. We all know the story of his beautiful friend Joe and the guilt he felt for being 2 minutes late before Joe jumped off the bridge. Between this song and Freckled Angel, both about Joe, we all feel the loss of Joe, of course, not like Ren. I cried. Another masterpiece from Ren ❤
Painfully beautiful 🥺🎶💔 The world 🌎 needs REN✨his music & lyrics his life story helps to open us up & know validation through music and we’re not alone and can all relate he heals are souls ❤️🩹 just let it all out ! 😭 🙏🏽prayers for REN✨ sending peace✌🏽& love🫶🏽 FUQ Boyz 😉
There are REAL MEN out there. Still wraps his arms around me, NO JUDGEMENT! LOST HIS YOUNGEST DAUGHTER... TO COLIN CANCER. FIRST TIME I'VE EVER SEEN MY POPS CRY. BLESS YOU CHRISTINA💜 your father is a great man.
Thanks guys for being so open and allowing us to see and hear your vulnerability. Ren’s work is literally saving lives, opening people up to share and talk about subjects that so many shy away from. His raw pain in the second part of this song left me stunned. I love the dual nature of this track - but I think like Ying and Yang they combine to make the complete whole. Thank you again guys for opening up and sharing your thoughts and feelings after seeing this video.
Fighting as you are Don ! Thanks for sharing this profound experience of yours. Diamonds come out from pressure, and the pressure that they are putting on us has its counter weight and is strenghthening our hearts in unexpected ways. Blessing to you all blossoming souls.
Thank you both. To take the time and be open to sharing your own experiences. Even though stories are not all the same and everyone has their own experience there is something someone can connect to when we are real. The think I picked up for the first time in hearing Ren's story over the past months .. in this video I picked up on a possible feeling of thinking he was late and could have stopped Joe. That was like a punch in the gut and I realized after you all talked how much we all have something that we think we might have prevented in some way if we had been there or been more aware. Great conversation. We connect with the real. Sharing not just the good times .. but the real. Don made me think of my own unexpressed loss of the pre-COVID (and earlier actually) loss os self. Not only getting older and more vulnerable but the loss of trust in being somehow taken care of. Texas had a major ice storm toward the end of lockdowns and we had power outages where hundreds died due to political posturing on lots of levels before and after. Anyway... Don speaking of how he was working on getting back at least some of that self let me know that it could be consciously worked on ... instead of just sitting in and feeling lost. Love you guys.
I REALLY appreciate you both getting real and vulnerable with us. It makes me feel so much less alone, especially because you both come off as happy-go-lucky and bouncy…it means more. I also changed dramatically during lockdown and woke up about what the people we have let be in charge of us are willing to do to us, the agencies that lied to us, and worse the way we turned on each other. I appreciate your courage in being authentic guys. It seems like the medicine people need right now.
Fellas I appreciate sharing your vulnerabilities. There is empowerment in discussing these parts of life. It's utilized very little, but we are made better by sharing. I think our society needs more of this, and it is brave to do it on your platformI applaud you.
So good of you Don to talk about letting go of the bitterness and anger and about your decision to set yourself free from that trap. Also, Ren has done such an eloquent job of talking/singing about such a painful subject.
I lost three brothers in 9 weeks around last Christmas. My TWIN to leukemia in November, another to suicide 2 days before Christmas, and the third to colon cancer on Jan 3. So I was terrified to watch Ren's song about suicide. But I did anyway, because I am the type of person to face fears, not cringe and hide. Yeah. The man gets it. Only too well, the man gets the pain of others. By speaking with 100% honesty about his own pain.
Oh that is just horrendous. I'm so sorry for your loss, hope you're ok. Much love and prayers to you and yours 🙏❤️
❤
❤
❤
🫂
2004 my son was accidentally shot in the head...I took care of him for 13 yrs when in 2017 he passed away due to the head injury...6 yrs ago today i saw his face for the last time before they closed the casket...His birthday was yesterday so this song really hit fucking hard...Eddie would have loved Ren has much as i do...Muzic has always pulled me thru life good or bad, ups nd downs...Of all the muzic that i have listen to over the yrs, it's been you and Linkin Park that has helped me more than anything else💝 This grandma respects and adores you sir...
You brought the tears back in my eyes. I can´t imagine anything worse, than losing your child. I don´t believe in god, but if I did, I would have prayed for you. I send you my love instead. From Denmark, Lene61/🇩🇰
🖤🖤🖤 so sorry for your loss 🖤🖤🖤
So, so sorry
@@JohnDoe-ds6pr please go easy. Loss is loss, and each of us has a story.
This song resonates differently depending on our history.
The lady who posted this made it through to now
Be kind, be kind, be fiercely kind. Roxy, we are with you.
Ren said this song wasnt originally about Joe, but after his interview with Knox Hill, where he spoke about him and his feelings about it, he sat to finish it and just opened up and the last bit poured out. He wanted to leave it raw, so this is what we got. It's so beautifully done. Thanks for sharing your stories, too.😊
12 years ago, I stood on that same bridge (Menai Bridge), wanting to end the loneliness I felt from hiding my psychosis. Didn't want the stigma of being someone who hears voices and thinking the world is against me. Seconds before jumping, one clear and logic thought stopped me. It told me to let go of my pride and find someone to talk to, no matter how embarrassing it was to me, to admit defeat. You don't lose anything by asking for help, but you do by not asking, by being the ' strong silent' man our culture has taught us to be.
Wow. This is my favorite thing about Ren’s music. He’s giving everyone permission to be open about their struggles. I am deeply impressed with how vulnerable you guys were in this video. Thank you ❤
Yeah ditto
I was Thinking Exactly the same here.................
Ren has clearly stated that he was having those ideations for many years due to his illness. And that when his friend Joe made that decision it affected him in such a way that it actually made him turn away from those thoughts, feeelins/ideations. Having to deal with the aftermath of losing someone made him see how it would potentially effect all the ones in his life that loved him.
Maybe in a way... his friend did that to help Ren, knowing he wanted out of this life anyways, but not wanting Ren to do the same.
I came here to say the same. I like what BP says, the way he sees it as something like a "sacrifice" to save another life /other lives
Yes - I was thinking about that, too. This song is a pressure release valve for Ren, and a cautionary tale for anyone with s-ideation. His vulnerability allows vulnerability in others. Watching the reaction to this was so beautiful. It shows exactly how Ren’s art affects the world. He’s making us reconnect with ourselves and each other again.
@@gossimgirl Don't be ridiculous, as if his friend would kill himself to help Ren not want to kill himself.
@@jimduggan8382 it’s not ridiculous for it to be part of it. You have no idea.
Beautiful, haunting song. Some critics might say that when an artist creates a song like Suic*de, they are being self-indulgent. But as your conversation here shows, so very many people are dealing with the same guilt Ren feels over the loss of his friend. With Ren's talent, he could easily break the code to produce music that will play on the radio. But he wants to do so much more with the gifts he has been given.
Amen
I’m wandering if by saying suicide a lot during the song if he’s trying to take away the taboo of the word.
@@grimsbytownfan - I also noticed how many times he was saying the word.
@@grimsbytownfan I think you`re right, its been mentioned on other reactions too.
@@grimsbytownfan I´ve been thinking the same thing. I have never been on CZcams as much as since I found Ren…and I have never seen so many common words being cut out.. for whom? The more we are tabooing a WORD, the more we will act. Its ridicolous, it cant protect to forbid that kind, like four-letter words and so on. In Denmark we are pretty liberal, so that suic*de is a t*boo w*rd shocked me. Hugs from Denmark 🥰🇩🇰
You’re not “supposed” to say the word suicide, like a true artist and human, Ren has shared his art and pain and breaks that cruel taboo, the chorus “suicide, suicide, suicide”. God bless him
Exactly, a taboo thing. Cruel world, he's trying to rise above it , process and do the right thing. And maybe it will give a to people who have contemplated or experienced such a loss(seems like, many people saying so). Heroic and heartfelt.
Best wishes.
Suicide, suicide, suicide. Fuck all.
It's taboo so who wants to call a help line and add that stigma to all the things they're already piling on themselves?
Trying to hide it is counterproductive, seeing the word isn't going to remind anyone it exists, nobody forgets.
I don't know where that even came from. Who said you're not supposed to say suicide or not talk about it?
The whole "unalived" bullshit being thrown around on social media needs to go.
It takes away from the discussion and almost makes it sound like a joke.
TALK ABOUT IT.
@@BrandonWestfall YT, and 'Murican media. czcams.com/video/4ZmeP-LRESE/video.html&ab_channel=StuartJRandall
I commented on the official video, but I lost my wife to suicide. The one thing I know I need to do, bone soul deep need to do is let go of the guilt I feel for her death. I can't. I can't let it go. It's my penance for living while she didn't. It never stops hurting, it's been thirteen year but it still feels like yesterday.
It’s not your fault. Don’t ever feel like you have to get over something tho, sometimes all you can hope is to keep getting through it.
“Grief is just love, with no where to go.”
I'm so sorry for your pain. Having been so close to ending my life several times over particularly dark periods, sometimes even knowing how loved you are and how much you mean to someone doesn't change the turmoil one feels inside that's there constantly and you just want that pain in your soul to stop so much that there's nothing anyone could say or do that would take that pain away. Some of us get to hear the voice that you hear when you loosen the noose on the rope, and some of us don't, or decide, for whatever reason, to ignore it. Please do what you can to let go of that burden you carry. Live On for her, love a joyous life for her. I imagine she would be so sad to think that ending her inner torture caused the beginning of yours and that you'd never be truly free to feel happiness again
I am so sorry you have had to carry that weight. The guilt isn't yours (ours), but I know it is so hard to put down. What I had to learn slowly is that you can carry forgiveness along with the guilt, like twin sisters. And this quote helped a little: "Forgiving yourself is finally giving up all hope of going back in time and getting a different result." You can't go back in time, and therefore you are allowed to go forward.
I’m so so sorry. I know what you’re going through. ❤
My heart goes out to you. I hope you find the strength to move on from the guilt. 💙
Dude, I feel you. My best man hung himself in his daughters bedroom 6 months after my wedding.
Unlike you, I and his family knew about his mental struggles and tried desperately to get him help. I was there for him as much as I could be, as was his wife. In the case of someone determined to go through with it, you alone cannot possibly change that. You can’t feel bad about it moving forward. It’s NOT your fault and you were helpless to intervene. Trust me, that negative thought will eat you up relentlessly. I know from experience.
It’s 30 years ago now and still hurts….. it always will, but at least music like this and the way mental health is approached nowadays means it’s a more positive outlook for their future.
Keep the faith brother. 💜
❤ have. Blessed day ❤🇬🇧
💪Keep the faith.
Its amazing - Its tragic - Its sad - Its real - Love the lyrics - Love the visuals - Ren did it again 💔😪❤
Man, I really feel Don here when he talks about his relationship and the pandemic. I’m glad he opened up about it because sometimes just knowing you’ve been in the same boat as folks can help. The pandemic was a perfect storm for problems that I’m still recovering from. The relationship of the person I expected to spend the rest of my life with ended, I was in a new town where I didn’t know anyone, and then when lockdown happened I couldn’t even have the opportunity to meet new friends by going out. It completely broke me mentally. I just stopped caring about anything and everything. My health, my career, my physique… everything. Things are finally on the upswing. But his story makes me feel better just from not feeling alone in that struggle. I guess that comes from our tribe mentality. And I hope anyone reading this feeling the same can feel that sense of community as well.
I was in the same place - 7 year relationship just ended, lost my stepson and our dog too and was in deep depression (my dark night - months! - of the soul and then there was Lockdown with no "social bubble" nearby and then I got long covid which incapacitated me for 18 months. There were many, many times I nearly gave up and the consequence of it all is I have PTSD now. But I'm glad I heard "the voice that you hear when you loosen the noose on the rope" and life is gradually getting better. On Ren's community channel he's just written that a friend once said to him "don't deny yourself the opportunity to make your life better" and that's really struck a chord with me. I'm glad the Vee back then gave the stronger Vee now this opportunity to make my life better and I'm doing that. I'm glad you and Don and all the other people in the world gave themselves that opportunity
@@Veeliscious Yes. Let’s do it. Time to rise back up together. We may not know each other personally, but we’re still connected. Lift each other up.
You're not alone. You are loved. You matter. Peace and love to you brother.
💖
@@Veeliscious Reaching Out with Arms Wide Open❤
Here with you from Sweden, Just cried my heart out. For Ren, for myself and for everyone else that are grieving a loved one
Black Pegasus, I just watched the premier and was stunned. So much pain in experiencing the suicide of a friend. Ren is amazing in this portrayal. We love him. My heart goes out to anyone suffering for any reason. Please seek help; find someone, anyone, to talk too. Ren mentions the tranquility of the water as seen from the location on the bridge. That broke me.
Ren is magic. He can grab the feelings out of your soul and put them in a song that he sings back to you and it hits you in just the right place
Don killed it on here right after the song giving Black Pegasus a chance to get his legs back under him after he said "I need a minute".
Don he may or may not say it to you brother but I can tell you with certainty you carrying the show like that was greatly appreciated.
Side bar though, I'm hearing he wrote the last verse after his interview with Knox.
Thank you for being vulnerable with us & yourselves.
I think Ren’s gift to the world is showing us all how to be real, to drop our masks both literally & metaphorically. I’ve seen such a shift online since he took off. People are talking to each other with interest & respect. He’s inspiring artists of all types to perhaps try something new or just keep going. It’s magical to watch it all. 💜
Spot in! He absolutely removes any facsimile of a mask… he is a good soul.
It was only when he began talking about the loss of his friend Joe Hughes in recent interviews that he started dealing with the loss and regret. So he went back to this song because it felt incomplete. He recorded the ending and kept it raw and real. I’m so glad he did. Regret can eat away at you, especially if you keep it locked inside.
I’m already seeing this song triggering a lot of important discussions. And if nothing else, we need to encourage others and tell people how much they mean to us.
this song saved my life today thank you Ren ❤
Ren said he had this song completed, final mix and mastering done, but felt it was missing something. It was after his interview with #KnoxHill that he decided to add the final verse and dedicate it to Joe Hughes (R.I.P.) He recorded it as he was writing it, just let it pour out with his real and raw emotion, it's horribly beautiful. Not ashamed to say I shed a tear for anyone who's ever had to deal with losing a loved one to suicide.
I lost my husband at 26, I am 52 now and I am just barely addressing all of the pain that came with his loss. His entire family (aside from our children) committed suicide after he did.. nothing makes you feel abandoned and isolated more than people who say they love you (that was actually his last words) and make a decision as permanent as suicide.
That's so tragic. I do think if those who commit that final act knew that it would affect people so much either they end their lives too or, even if living a part of them dies /their chance at living a full and happy life stops, they likely wouldn't go ahead. The sad thing is (and I know as I've been there too) when you are in that dark place, you don't believe in your own value enough to think it would impact even your loved ones in such a permanently devastating way
Wow. I’m incredibly saddened by your story. 😢😢😢❤
My heart goes out to you, I can't imagine 💙
My 13 year old son died in 2011. Of kidney failure. I destroy myself every day since with guilt, knowing that if I'd been there, i could have saved him. He was with my sister and my niece that day,,and they did everything they could to save him. The pain at the end of this song is something i know well...
RIP Nathaniel,Mommy loves and misses you❤
😢❤❤❤❤
These conversations are why I love Ren so much! His music has allowed these open, honest & vulnerable conversations to happen around subjects that people find so hard and struggle with on the daily. Especially men. These conversations will help so many and allow them to feel they can reach out. Thank you Ren and BP & Don
I cried my eyes out over "Freckled Angels", but this really got me. Beautiful and haunting. Its so painful to actual hear the pain Ren is going through and rhe guilt he's feeling about arriving at the bridge too late...the what if's and if only's are obvious to me. We all have them. God bless Ren, much love 🙏❤️ and Mr BP and The Don, another wonderful reaction, you two really are great. 🤜🤛
Thank you Don. I feel the same. I am finally finding out who I am again after 3 years of isolation. I was so angry and miserable living in this weird rural town in North Devon in the UK. I never thought I wasn't going to come out of the darkness this time. I've had low times before but it was a few months. This was years but I've finally started to come out of it now thank God. It took a random opportunity that was inspired Ren and Ren inspired me to explore creativity again. I'm now upcycling clothes for a living and making tracksuits. I owe Ren and all of the reaction channels so much. You all helped me on the lonely days and nights. I'm okay now. I mean I still have the ADHD. I'm 44 now and I got very low but after discovering Ren I became inspired and energized. Thanks for opening up Don. I always enjoy your reactions and stories. I also loved the interview. Thanks for doing this channel. It really helps me every day and I look forward to these.
I write about the loss of my soul mate to cancer. I can never reread what I write without breaking down. Ren’s ability to write lyrics so deep, so raw, so gut-wrenchingly real and then to go back an sing them... I could never. Whenever I try and verbally articulate my loss of Jae I lose the ability to breathe. I lose the ability to convey. This video needs to exist, Ren is arriving when he needs to. This all is not a random happening. This is needed.
Nigdy nie jest tak, że mamy tysiące przyjaciół. Zawsze można ich policzyć na palcach jednej ręki. Ja miałem i rozumiem, teraz mam nowego i jestem szczęściarzem. REN po prostu tęskni.
I cried through this whole song and I am sure I am not the only one…at least for me I went through all of those feelings in my head since I was a little girl in a alcoholic household and was sexually abused by one of my parents friends and it was all ignored and so many times felt suicidal. This song in some ways gave me validation for the feelings I had growing up. I am older now and because it was never addressed as a child this song gave me validation for some reason for all of the feelings I have gone through and I cried like a baby.
I didn't cry (it was close though), I did have something happen that I never experienced in a song before. In the darkest saddest moments of my life, holding back, being strong, my throat would close up. It is totally an unconscious physical response due to deep sorrow. My throat closed. Unbelievable
My dear, you are valuable and worthy of love. ❤
To anyone that is going through it right now. remember... it might not seem like it... but it's gonna get better. Nothing stays forever, everything changes. And this too shall pass. You are loved. Talk to someone if you can, and if you can't that's OK too. just take a minute... and remember. You. Are. Loved.
Can feel your love & support for Ren ❤
You both have my respect.
Thank you ❤️
Ren is so genuine and so pure and so talented that’s he’s really got everyone listening to him to open up and to be able to talk and to ask for help and have the kind of conversations you two just had
Oh boy. What a reaction you two. Much respect to you both for sharing so much. At first, BP, I was worried when you were quiet and processing for so long i wanted to put my hands on your shoulders and say "Its ok, let it out. Breathe.." but then you started talking and opening up and your shoulders dropped a little too. I love your idea that maybe in some way loved ones kind of sacrifice themselves, on a spiritual level, to help save the life or lives of others. My dad commited suicide when I was 10 and whilst i have felt suicidal during some dark months of the soul, the one thing that stopped me was knowing the long term effect it could have on those closest to me. This was kind of backed up by a clairvoyant i went to see once during a period I was contemplating it - she said "Your Dad is saying 'Don't do what I did' " and as she said it, I felt that wave of pain his suicide 25 years before had left me with and realised then that's what I'd leave my mum with. That's the voice that I hear when I "loosen the noose on the rope"
I don't believe there is a word for Ren and his talent and his being. Words just don't seem to explain how amazing his talent is or what an amazing human being is. I hobestly ran out of words for this spectacular human being!
If you've been through it, this song hurts even more. Survivors have the same thoughts, feelings.....beliefs. Could we have done something different.....something MORE. RIP Mom.....you are not forgotten.
Just hearing that heavy breathing ren does brings back memories for me and puts a lump in mi throat
I'm so thankful for the conversations this song has started. I feel for both of you for the challenges you face. There's plenty of love for you both here. Thank you for being the real deal.
I'm officially putting my support behind the movement to elect Ren Gill as Ambassador of The Earth Human Collective, to be the representative of the human species when intelligent life inevitably makes their presence known to us. He would be able to honestly convince them that we have our faults, but were generally nice...
The polishing on this track is unbelievable, I think music production wise this is my favourite. I don't know how he pulled off such a raw feel with such a finished production level simultaneously
Ren has a way of touching our hearts and raw emotions. I believe that is why he is connecting with so many people and growing so fast.
Nearly at 100k Peg and Don let's f*cking get this my guys. And let us take a moment for this beautiful song and the message. We have all lost close people and they would want us to stay strong and keep going. They will be proud of everything you have and will do. ❤
Such care in a reaction peeps. ❤ This reaction was heartfelt. Peace and love to you all
The only song where you feel this much pain(that I know of) is NF -How Could You Leave Us. Beyond impressive to be able to pour that much raw emotion into a song.
yeah i was thinking about this one as well.
Yeah, that song always gets me in the feels. In the end when he breaks down and can't sing the last verse as planned, and just starts talking and crying... his raw, naked pain, expressed in that specific way, a way Nate doesn't usually show publicly, it's really hard to take.
@@SCash-rl5ee I have unaltered admiration for artists, especially men, considering history, who are true to their self and their emotions and who dare to share their vulnerabily with us. Men were and are still so conditionned to show no emotion at all at the exception of anger. It gives me hope for Men's liberation.
His artistry is beyond the words I have in me. Can’t remember the last time I had the ugly crying 😭 Thank you guys for the authentic reaction and subsequent conversation ❤
Lyrics:
Oh I, oh I, oh I've
Fallen through the cracks of the night sky
A light goes out on the other side
Suicide, suicide, suicide
Oh I, oh I, oh I'm
Treading on the tracks in the night-time
It never really felt like the right time
Suicide, suicide, suicide
I'm so fucking lonely beneath this
Narcissistic, can't keep a secret
Miscount sheep, I can't sleep, a misfit
Some say troubled, but some say sadistic
Bruises, my brother, one time or the other
My skin felt counterfeit, siliconе, rubber
Bruises my sister, skin pop thе blister
Dig deep, resist the feeling when it hits you
Oh I, oh I, oh I've
Fallen through the cracks of the night sky
A light goes out on the other side
Suicide, suicide, suicide
Oh I, oh I, oh I'm
Treading on the tracks in the night-time
It never really felt like the right time
Suicide, suicide, suicide
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[Sample]
Sick boi, sick boi, bitten by a tick boi
I feel like it's not me, it's the world that's sick
I'm so fucking washed up and sea sick
Masochistic kid with a split lip
Six feet deep, I can't eat, I'm nervous
Won't stay down 'cause my body purges
Useless my mother, can't keep in my supper
Skin so pale 'cause my cheeks leak colour
Truth is my father, you choose your karma
Draw for the sword then drive through the armour
Oh I, oh I, oh I've
Fallen through the cracks of the night sky
A light goes out on the other side
Suicide, suicide, suicide
Oh I, oh I, oh I'm
Treading on the tracks in the night-time
It never really felt like the right time
Suicide, suicide, suicide
Suicide, suicide, suicide
Suicide, suicide, suicide
Suicide, suicide, suicide
Suicide, suicide, suicide
It's hard to take off from the ground when your wings are cut
Your stomach burns when you're drinking from an empty cup
You know the entire ocean came from my tear ducts?
I see the world through Fibonacci Sequences and Double Dutch
I guess there’s some that’s born lucky, there’s some that’s not
I tried to cut away my bitterness - hatchet job
I locked my youth in a trunk inside a pick up truck
Then dumped the whole thing over the same bridge the night you jumped
I think about that sometimes, vividly
What it felt like to look down and see tranquility
One sudden movement in a world of possibility
Only one movement to expose our fragility
I fucking miss you and I miss myself
I miss thinking that were indestructible as well
I miss chilling by the pier cave and kicking back
With Callum, Hugo, Sagar, Justin, Stevie and the fuckin' lads
I miss missing that, I numbed myself to close the gap
I never even call 'em up, the distance is my plaster cast
The truth is that the day you jumped my childhood jumped too
But I still can’t find the anger, all I find is missing you
Man, I miss you
With all my rhymes
I picture running five minutes quicker, I'm right on time
I picture pulling you back over the edge and then we're crying
And holding you, my brother and telling you that it's fine
That’s not the way that I worked
Coz I was late like a jerk
There's not a day where I could find a way to break from the hurt
Your body missing so we never got to wave to the hearse
I hope you're listening
I love you man, I miss you absurd
Fuck
Ren - Su!cIde
A game changer in the music industry, independent artist, genuine, honest, and a authentic human being.
Sam Tompkins released a new song this evening, its like an answer: Things will change.♥
Time will fly! Beautiful song!
Ren is not just a amazing artist he has also started a movement ❤❤❤
Hey guys, you're probably not going to read this, but I enjoy your openness about your mental states. However, there is a thing that stood out to me during the last two Ren reactions. Your depression over Covid, and what the goverment can do, everything.
40 year old German here. I used to work in a club with concerts, now at a restaurant. During Covid many of my artist friends felt left alone, because they couldn't do what they used to. I couldn't, restaurant was closed. And yeah, it got all of us thinking.
However, I want to share a different perspective. When the restaurant was closed, I helped out on the local ICU during winter of 2020. It was horrible. I was cleaning rooms and beds - every day people died of covid. Every freaking day. When I went into the rooms, protected as well as possible, it was just silence, and the sound of the mashines that make you breath. On christmas day I had to clean 6 beds - which meant 6 people left our earth. And it was just on my station with.. around 10 beds. There where hundreds of beds in the hospital..
Also my best friend is a doctor of virology. He kept me up to date, he knew what was happening, how many people would die if the government did nothing. Also he knew it'd take a few years and we'd be ok again - with vaccines, with human bodies knowing how to react to the new virus. We as humans sure don't care for one another if we're not forced to. If there where concerts like before at that time, without vaccines, each one would have quite certainly killed people. You get it there, you visit your family, someone won't make it. It was the goverments responsibility to get us through that time in my opinion. My 90 year old neighbor would have died. Friends on cancer treatment would have died. Grandparents, parents.
There were people out there spreading lies about it. "It's not harmful, just keep everything open" - and this split societies - here in Germany too, but for sure in the U.S... don't be mad about what happened, be mad at those who spread lies and poisoned hearts.
Ren, in his condition, would probably not have survived it at that time. And he coulnd't have been safe anywhere if there were no rules, as painful as they where for all of us. Losing jobs, not seeing friends, not being able to do what you love. But sometimes others have to decide for us, since we don't know enough to always act responsible. It was a tough time, but.. there was no way around some of the measures back then. Tens of millions would have died in the U.S. alone if there were no regulations. Friends, family. Someones friends, someones familiy.
Much love & respect to you guys.🙏❤️ Don when you said you lost yourself in the pandemic, oh man that's exactly how I feel...😢 So much pain in this review, in the comments, in the song.🖤🖤🖤 Reach out to those you love, you may just save a life. Don't ask how they are, most people will lie & say fine, remind them of that great night out you had, that chilled out day just hanging out that was perfect & arrange to meet up. Much love 🙏❤️❤️❤️
I feel this deeply too. ❤
Ren is a genius, how many can Rap, Sing play multiple instruments, produce, direct videos and do their own marketing, all whilst being so fucking real.
That’s before I even get to his versatility. Wow. So impressed
I'm in my 40's and recently opened up to my parents about some trauma in my early age (not from my parents). It is freeing to let it go. This is amazing. Great job Ren and you guys.
56yrs ago "Regret" almost took me out. My brain was stuck in the "if only/what if" world. I regreted everything I said and I did.
Regret is vicious, regret is unforgiving.
Then in the dark basement, on the edge of taking myself out, I got angry.
I decided Regret had to Go!
I mentally grabbed Regret, stuffed it into a dark black box that I tied shut with a dark red ribbon. I visualized placing it into a back corner of my head.
It took practice. It took time. To grab new regets and stuff them into that box.
Eventually I replaced regret with acceptance. Owned my errors, owned decisions.
I NEVER play the "what if" game.
I make the very best decision I can make at the time I make it. Own the results and take another step forward.
Turns out I really like myself, mistakes and all.
Turns out I really like everyone I meet, now... mistakes and all.
At 68.5yrs old, though life has been hard, at times harsh. I have enjoyed my life so very very much.
Don going into his own life and sharing it in away that relates to our sense of self made this so relatable. Shows the levels and impact music can have for creators and listeners. In a world where being honest with ourselves is a struggle and if you can, sharing those realizations isn’t met with a road map, I commend him for bringing up such a sadly common storyline that is uncommonly talked about publicly as a result of the pandemic (loneliness/change)
Ren made me cry in this song . The ending was so powerful
How could you leave us by NF is pretty similar in heavyness and rawness. Great song by Ren takes alot of guts to pour out your soul like this.
A beautiful tribute to Ren’s brother Joe. My heart was heavy the whole time, my tears flowed at the end. Thank you for this reaction.
This broke me…I cried! 😢 but it’s wonderful at the same time. It’s brutal!
I just had missed this live and just watched the entirety. This one truly brought me to tears. I so feel what Ren was expressing as I've been through similar event in my lifetime. Enjoy listening to what you and Don expressed. Part of me I feel recognizes a part of him in this one. 🙏
The fact a song can trigger so many emotions. Masterpiece. 👏 Ren done that. 😭 Let's go 100k!
I really appreciate a hip-hop duo bracing the topic of suicide. The pandemic pushed me into a "I don't need anyone, I can do everything myself!" I've got one good friend I can count on, and they light up my week. I've put a pause on dating, as I was dumped New Years Day by someone I really thought was awesome. I have family trauma (who doesn't), so I rely on that one friendship and the kindness of coworkers. But we will all prevail. There is love in the world if you look hard enough. Thanks again!
You’ve talked about this really well. I don’t think we would have had this if he had been connected to a big company. I’m glad Ren is finding his own way to reach his audience. It’s taken longer but it’s a true connection ❤
Bp.. the thing is you won´t call anyone in that situation, you stop believing. The only thing that stops you is, like Ren sings: i never found the right time. It is hard to see the perspective, that life is sooo short, and death is eternal. Thank you both for doing this reaction video, eventhough it is a tough one to react on. Lots of love for both from Denmark. Lene 61/🇩🇰 🥰🥰🥰
What a beautifully heartbreaking tribute.
My sister passed in 2005 10 days before Christmas, frozen in her back garden after drinking the best part of 2 bottles of vodka and lots of pills. She had years of depression and mental episodes that led up to that point. My Dad spent years trying to help her but in the end nothing was enough. It broke our family. We all tried to find ways to make it make sense, wondering what we could have done differently. The truth is, we did everything. Sometimes we hold our own pain so close so as to not inflict it on others, to protect ourselves from judgement.
The coroner gave a verdict of death by misadventure and in truth we will never know if it was an accident or intentional. All we could do was hope that after years of pain, she was finally at peace.
Take care Ren and anyone out there who is affected by this disease.
Ren makes it ok to be who we are... in a world that begs to differ. RIP Joe. x
It is interesting how many deep discussions that happens because of Rens music. That in it self is a revolution in todays musical landscape
In this world of plastic fake emotions designed to sell products, Ren reminds you we are all human and real shit happens and we have to deal with it. Man is a poet.
I love that you are actually brave enough to actually say the title of the song, while many other reactors are scared to get demonetized. I LOVE YOU GUYS.
This episode was fire. You guys just peeled back the onion and gave a brilliantly raw self reflective reaction, inspired by one of most transparent versatile artists… maybe ever.
This was THE best interview. How you sat back and let him talk - this is how an interview should flow.
He even promts you on times; "you said that" and you still sit back and let him speak. Beautiful.
Thank you brothers. 🙏🏼 Thank you truly for being honest genuine and vulnerable human beings. Let’s do what we can to hang onto hope and forgive ourselves.
I have watched you for awhile but this is the first conversation where I feel like souls were truly bared. This moment is what matters concerning relationships and healing. I find great value in this conversation. Thankyou.
6:02 I am so glad you mentioned about the robots-AI angle: feeling like you lack all worthy substance, i.e. artificial, is something I know I experienced in the depths of my depression throughout childhood and that this was part an parcel of the lived experience of despising myself every minute of each day in my childhood. Everything from the animated eyes, to the empty and lonely feel of the spaces animated, like in every other video Ren makes perfectly suits communication of the place and experience wrapped into the reality Ren sings about.
Don I'm passing through the same process as you...Be strong man!! I know exactly what you are feeling bro!
Big hug from Madeira Island to USA for you guys!
This is something new in music. Seriously cannot sum up how amazing and important Ren is going to be for music. An absolute genius and legend in the making. Truly unbelievable and yet another song that is just on another level. Please stay independent and keep doing as your doing.
Amazing Ren has let us into his life through music, his blogs, his lives. We all know the story of his beautiful friend Joe and the guilt he felt for being 2 minutes late before Joe jumped off the bridge. Between this song and Freckled Angel, both about Joe, we all feel the loss of Joe, of course, not like Ren. I cried. Another masterpiece from Ren ❤
Just went from bopping to a banging beat, to bauling my eyes out to the last section
Painfully beautiful
🥺🎶💔
The world 🌎 needs REN✨his music & lyrics his life story helps to open us up & know validation through music and we’re not alone
and can all relate
he heals are souls ❤️🩹 just let it all out ! 😭
🙏🏽prayers for REN✨
sending peace✌🏽&
love🫶🏽 FUQ Boyz 😉
Thank you so much for every bit of this reaction. Thank you both!!
Thank you guys, for your openness, we appreciate your willingness to be so honest about things, setting a good precedent.
i love your channel you two are so real. ty
I love this song. Thanks for sharing your stories.
Thank you for your honesty and willingness to be vulnerable. I like you guys more and more the more I watch.
Very powerful 👏 🙌 🙏 thank you both for this beautiful message ❤️
There are REAL MEN out there. Still wraps his arms around me, NO JUDGEMENT! LOST HIS YOUNGEST DAUGHTER... TO COLIN CANCER. FIRST TIME I'VE EVER SEEN MY POPS CRY.
BLESS YOU CHRISTINA💜 your father is a great man.
Thanks guys for being so open and allowing us to see and hear your vulnerability. Ren’s work is literally saving lives, opening people up to share and talk about subjects that so many shy away from.
His raw pain in the second part of this song left me stunned.
I love the dual nature of this track - but I think like Ying and Yang they combine to make the complete whole. Thank you again guys for opening up and sharing your thoughts and feelings after seeing this video.
speechless OMG.....love you guys!!!
Thank you for sharing your personal stories. ❤
This channel is becoming a new favorite!!! Keep it up!!!
Luv u guys... great reaction. Nice we are all with Ren on his emotional journey.
Omg, I just had to pause it again cause I wanna cry 😢. I love to see your hearts 💟.
Thanks again for jumping right on top of this love it❤
beautiful description of friendship and the small yet crucial instances of it...just beautiful and human and i love it
Fighting as you are Don ! Thanks for sharing this profound experience of yours.
Diamonds come out from pressure, and the pressure that they are putting on us has its counter weight and is strenghthening our hearts in unexpected ways.
Blessing to you all blossoming souls.
Thank you both. To take the time and be open to sharing your own experiences. Even though stories are not all the same and everyone has their own experience there is something someone can connect to when we are real. The think I picked up for the first time in hearing Ren's story over the past months .. in this video I picked up on a possible feeling of thinking he was late and could have stopped Joe. That was like a punch in the gut and I realized after you all talked how much we all have something that we think we might have prevented in some way if we had been there or been more aware. Great conversation. We connect with the real. Sharing not just the good times .. but the real. Don made me think of my own unexpressed loss of the pre-COVID (and earlier actually) loss os self. Not only getting older and more vulnerable but the loss of trust in being somehow taken care of. Texas had a major ice storm toward the end of lockdowns and we had power outages where hundreds died due to political posturing on lots of levels before and after. Anyway... Don speaking of how he was working on getting back at least some of that self let me know that it could be consciously worked on ... instead of just sitting in and feeling lost. Love you guys.
I REALLY appreciate you both getting real and vulnerable with us. It makes me feel so much less alone, especially because you both come off as happy-go-lucky and bouncy…it means more. I also changed dramatically during lockdown and woke up about what the people we have let be in charge of us are willing to do to us, the agencies that lied to us, and worse the way we turned on each other. I appreciate your courage in being authentic guys. It seems like the medicine people need right now.
Fellas I appreciate sharing your vulnerabilities. There is empowerment in discussing these parts of life. It's utilized very little, but we are made better by sharing. I think our society needs more of this, and it is brave to do it on your platformI applaud you.
BP& DON
I think you're chanel has got to be the best around love it.... from the u.k.
Thank you both for your authenticity and vulnerability. So glad Ren's doing his thing. Amazing.
Great content Brothers. Thank you Ren. Thank you Joe. God Bless you all. Much Love. Everything will be good!
So good of you Don to talk about letting go of the bitterness and anger and about your decision to set yourself free from that trap. Also, Ren has done such an eloquent job of talking/singing about such a painful subject.
Great reaction guys. I don't know how you held back the tears. I've watched this three times already and have had tears everytime.