r/SuspiciousQuotes - I'm "18"

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  • čas přidán 22. 09. 2022
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Komentáře • 2,9K

  • @emerald_digger5192
    @emerald_digger5192 Před rokem +3342

    "Can you imagine a store that does like an escape room thing..." I am pretty sure those stores are called Ikea

    • @damionlee7658
      @damionlee7658 Před rokem +238

      Many years ago I worked nights restocking in an IKEA. The hardest part of that job was finding my way back to the loading dock for the first few nights.

    • @darrenhemingway7121
      @darrenhemingway7121 Před rokem +147

      Seem to remember a story about IKEA changing direction arrows on the floor from adhesive vinyl to projected lights after someone modified some stores to go round in circles. At least the lights are more difficult to change without being noticed (though not impossible…)

    • @Mikustan39
      @Mikustan39 Před rokem +78

      @@darrenhemingway7121 “Ferb”, I “know” what “we’re” going to “do” “today”!

    • @Raxhe
      @Raxhe Před rokem +66

      Hotel California but it's Ikea: "you can check out anytime you like, but you have to find the checkout first >:)"

    • @emerald_digger5192
      @emerald_digger5192 Před rokem +25

      @@darrenhemingway7121 You remember right. a guy did that once and was arrested

  • @Master_Conner
    @Master_Conner Před rokem +4900

    At this point, us viewers should be considered a class six drug or something the way he is snorting us.

  • @Gemini-Lion
    @Gemini-Lion Před rokem +1599

    The 5 horsemen of r/suspiciousquotes:
    - Sexual innuendos
    - Threats
    - Makes no sense at all
    - Actually makes sense
    - Sarcasm

    • @Centyme
      @Centyme Před rokem +105

      "Sexual innuendos"
      "Threats"
      "Makes no sense at all"
      "Actually makes sense"
      "Sarcastic"
      There. I "fixed" your comment.

    • @Bella51885
      @Bella51885 Před rokem +71

      - Sexual innuendos
      - "Threats"
      - Makes no sense at all
      - "Actually makes sense"
      - Sarcastic
      There. I fixed "your" comment.
      ":)"

    • @socialistrepublicofvietnam1500
      @socialistrepublicofvietnam1500 Před rokem +51

      This is an accurate "comment" that "you" made

    • @cycrothelargeplanet
      @cycrothelargeplanet Před rokem +23

      Lmao, this is "so" funny

    • @Bella51885
      @Bella51885 Před rokem +17

      No, this "is" so funny.

  • @neversittingdown5354
    @neversittingdown5354 Před rokem +1729

    The "I love my rescue 'dog'" is just the plot of Lilo and Stitch lol

    • @Coreylikesgames
      @Coreylikesgames Před rokem +42

      And the horror story “Zipper dog” lol

    • @gracetreichel1973
      @gracetreichel1973 Před rokem +50

      Ah yes, my "dog" is "licking" my "hands." "She" is "cute." Her "tail" is "wagging."

    • @TheGuyKevin
      @TheGuyKevin Před rokem +16

      @@gracetreichel1973 ah, "yes".

    • @tsxkoople9223
      @tsxkoople9223 Před 11 měsíci +3

      @@gracetreichel1973 I

    • @_Wh0Am1_
      @_Wh0Am1_ Před 10 měsíci +3

      @@Coreylikesgames "fr"

  • @AaliyahTheFoxFan
    @AaliyahTheFoxFan Před rokem +5928

    I'm glad I am "sick" today so I can "watch this" on time instead of being at "school"

  • @Super_Panda_BS
    @Super_Panda_BS Před rokem +1618

    Fun animal fact: Each arm of a giant Pacific octopus has 280 suction cups that are individually controlled to feel, grasp, release and rotate. Each sucker also contains chemical sensors that let the octopus taste and smell its environment.

  • @cardinalhamneggs5253
    @cardinalhamneggs5253 Před rokem +266

    If they say "Live" Band, it means the musicians are undead.

  • @milosmallraccoon385
    @milosmallraccoon385 Před rokem +154

    I can't believe the "befriended" joke actually ended up in that subreddit 💀

    • @circuitboard2brain
      @circuitboard2brain Před 7 měsíci +14

      Im not to the part of the video so when i saw the kris pfp i knew instantly

    • @TheSkyGuy77
      @TheSkyGuy77 Před 3 měsíci +1

      Its also a joke a middle school kid would write. 😂

    • @TheTrueXaver
      @TheTrueXaver Před 2 měsíci +1

      it's literally the joke though. aren't they meant to be unintentional?

    • @TeamGalactic-Cyrus
      @TeamGalactic-Cyrus Před 2 měsíci

      fr

    • @serhumano3692
      @serhumano3692 Před měsícem

      ​@@TheTrueXaverno, they are meant to be there

  • @GoatLadyOnTheInternet
    @GoatLadyOnTheInternet Před rokem +2077

    Fun fact! In 1866, 80 men from Lichtenstein went to war, with zero casualties and in fact came back with 81 men, as a Hungarian officer came with them, as they avoided all conflict and just drank and smoked

    • @sneaky1053
      @sneaky1053 Před rokem +112

      Is there an article of this story? Id really like to hear more about it

    • @ahryia2476
      @ahryia2476 Před rokem +92

      Wholesome History! We need more!

    • @plantainsame2049
      @plantainsame2049 Před rokem +231

      The people watching their military comeback with one random Hungarian officer:
      Hungarian officer: sup

    • @ahryia2476
      @ahryia2476 Před rokem +235

      The soldiers after meeting the hungarian officer :
      "Please, Sir, can we keep him, Sir? Pleaaase!"
      CO : "as long as you take care of it responsibly I guess... you'll have to convince the higher ups yourself..."

    • @o-mangaming5042
      @o-mangaming5042 Před rokem +141

      Sounds like you need to say they went to "war."

  • @9895_
    @9895_ Před rokem +862

    I dont have a reddit account but this deserves to be here:
    I didn't kidnap a child
    'I' didn't kidnap a child
    I 'didn't' kidnap a child
    I didn't 'kidnap' a child
    I didn't kidnap 'a' child
    I didn't kidnap a 'child'

    • @maleineperle1770
      @maleineperle1770 Před rokem +73

      Amazingly creepy!

    • @someotherworldlybeing3167
      @someotherworldlybeing3167 Před rokem

      Normal
      Someone else did
      You did
      You murdered the child and stored it in the wods
      You've kidnapped multiple children
      You kidnapped an adult

    • @GuillaumePerronNantel
      @GuillaumePerronNantel Před rokem +41

      Beside "I ‘didn’t' kidnap a child", I can’t see anything being bad.

    • @Julia-tk2em
      @Julia-tk2em Před rokem +103

      @@GuillaumePerronNantel the second from the bottom implies multiple kidnappings.

    • @joeymanus8108
      @joeymanus8108 Před rokem +16

      What are these things like called I want to see more of these lmao

  • @steemcgee5150
    @steemcgee5150 Před rokem +77

    As a lesbian I can confirm I have a "nut" allergy

    • @w1steri4
      @w1steri4 Před 20 dny

      69 likes

    • @w1steri4
      @w1steri4 Před 20 dny

      anyways, as a lesbian, you can "confirm" you have a nut "allergy"

  • @pipticken
    @pipticken Před rokem +142

    "I want to thank the parents of the boy who saved my daughter from an embarrassing situation by telling the whole world about the embarrassing thing that happened to her" cute sentiment, but now everyone knows what you're daughter was trying to hide 🤦‍♀️

    • @GreenLycan
      @GreenLycan Před 11 měsíci +13

      And that's not a bad thing, it's biology.

    • @DrachenGothik666
      @DrachenGothik666 Před 7 měsíci +6

      *Your* daughter, not "you're". "You're" means "you are".

    • @jellykitty699
      @jellykitty699 Před 7 měsíci +3

      @@DrachenGothik666 How do we know they weren't saying "you're daughter" because the person who made the original post is secretly the daughter?
      /j

    • @jakepullman4914
      @jakepullman4914 Před měsícem

      @@GreenLycan So is diarrhea. Doesn't mean everyone wants to hear about it when it happens.

    • @GreenLycan
      @GreenLycan Před měsícem +1

      ​@@jakepullman4914lol, true, but you just did.

  • @auntiefish4192
    @auntiefish4192 Před rokem +457

    I used to have this “boss” who would always pepper her “emails” with random “quotation marks” all the time. It made every “communication” from her an “interesting” experience

    • @chancewill6910
      @chancewill6910 Před rokem +31

      I had an english teacher who did that. Excuse me ma'am, you're doing your job wrong

    • @cartoonhippie6610
      @cartoonhippie6610 Před rokem +14

      I had a professor who would use ellipses instead of periods. Caused several genuine misunderstandings. 😣

    • @w1steri4
      @w1steri4 Před 20 dny

      i used to "have" this boss who "would" always pepper "her" emais with "random" quotation marks "all" the time. it "made" every communication "from" her an interesting "experience".

  • @friedstickbug
    @friedstickbug Před rokem +536

    he's "working" on an emotional support demon "plushie" 🥺

  • @erinhollow773
    @erinhollow773 Před rokem +74

    The "21" thing reminded me of a earlier this week when I could only go somewhere if I lied about my age by 2 weeks.

  • @felixhenson9926
    @felixhenson9926 Před rokem +158

    I think the cockroach "milk" was suggesting it's cockroach milk in the same way almond milk is milk - obviously they don't lactate to actually milk them.

    • @lexwithbub
      @lexwithbub Před rokem +14

      Yeah that one was actually correct usage

    • @iniratagen9740
      @iniratagen9740 Před 9 měsíci +8

      I need to get my mind out of the gutter

    • @Reverend_Salem
      @Reverend_Salem Před 5 měsíci

      kinda.
      the "milk" is produced by a specific species of cockroach that gives birth to live young. and feeds them a pale yellow liquid.
      granted, the only way to harvest it is to cut open the cockroach and collect the milk.
      however, if it is ever sold in the future, it is unlikely to be made from cockroaches (as you need 1,000 cockroaches to make 3.5 Oz of milk), and instead would likely be made from modified yeast.

    • @melissatrible4214
      @melissatrible4214 Před 2 měsíci

      it's actually weirder than that. At least some cockroaches give birth to live young, and afaik they do produce a vaguely milk-like substance to feed their babbies before they lay them.

  • @AhsimNreiziev
    @AhsimNreiziev Před rokem +400

    In case you didn't know, the abbreviation "MD" stands for "Medical Doctor". So, with Zoidberg writing it as " 'M'D ", it implies he isn't really a _Medical_ Doctor.

    • @camo_dactyl4561
      @camo_dactyl4561 Před rokem +26

      Ah yes, a Medieval doctor

    • @TheGuyKevin
      @TheGuyKevin Před rokem +37

      @@camo_dactyl4561 "doctor my leg hurts"
      "Say no more."
      *Chops off legs*

    • @infiniteshay8660
      @infiniteshay8660 Před rokem +17

      In truth the M stands for Mfraud.

    • @lucienzothesmallerone
      @lucienzothesmallerone Před 9 měsíci +13

      ​@@infiniteshay8660 why did I read it like you read "m'lady"?😂

    • @jellykitty699
      @jellykitty699 Před 7 měsíci +15

      @@lucienzothesmallerone"Hello, m'fraud"

  • @Yso_the_beaver
    @Yso_the_beaver Před rokem +892

    I didn't know there were people who use quotes to emphasize things until today, and now I'm "in pain"

    • @kaelin_cherise
      @kaelin_cherise Před rokem +95

      It took me partway through the video to realize it was simply emphasis and it's bothering why they wouldn't use something like asterisks instead. Or in the case of signage- A BOLD OR COLORED FONT

    • @Strawberries1994
      @Strawberries1994 Před rokem +21

      Yeah haha is pretty common in a lot of places and languages, is less aggressive than using all caps... although is more common to just use one ' apostrophe and not quotes "

    • @John_Weiss
      @John_Weiss Před rokem +52

      @@Strawberries1994 _Italics_ is also used for _emphasis_ in English writing, and is less *emphatic* that *bold* text.
      Well, at least, in most fonts. CZcams uses a more muted bold-typeface.

    • @RedMoon814
      @RedMoon814 Před rokem +35

      Ikr? I'm surprised those people dont just put the words in bold, or another color, or italics, or underline. Literally anything but quotes

    • @Strawberries1994
      @Strawberries1994 Před rokem +8

      @@John_Weiss yeah, but you have to remember every single code for every single app and program... apostrophes are easy, quick and accessible...
      Although in physical signs is a little silly, bc you can just change the color or make it bigger (italic and bold most of the time are less clear, so those aren't a good option in those cases)

  • @ebbenazor7857
    @ebbenazor7857 Před rokem +37

    I think this is my "favourite" subreddit so far! 🤣🤣🤣

    • @w1steri4
      @w1steri4 Před 20 dny +1

      i "think" this is "your" favorite subreddit "so far"

  • @darthfalafel6581
    @darthfalafel6581 Před rokem +543

    'Every person is a deep fake except me' is an actual philosophical concept

    • @achild07
      @achild07 Před rokem +29

      Yeah isnt it like where you believe that everyone else is just a figment of your imagination except you? There's an actual name for it

    • @darthfalafel6581
      @darthfalafel6581 Před rokem +16

      @@achild07 It is, I believe, related to Descartes' 'Cogito ergo sum', but I do not know if it has its own name

    • @NerdyRulerz
      @NerdyRulerz Před rokem +36

      @@darthfalafel6581 I think it's metaphysical solipsism? Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong

    • @achild07
      @achild07 Před rokem +4

      @@NerdyRulerz Yeah this is what I was thinking of

    • @masteroffiyah
      @masteroffiyah Před rokem +17

      Every "person" is a "deep fake" except me

  • @CREN13Queen
    @CREN13Queen Před rokem +1318

    As a Scottish person "I'm not wearing pants and that could be yee" is the best kilt joke I have ever heard

    • @Echo_the_half_glitch
      @Echo_the_half_glitch Před rokem +46

      As a not-scottish person that kilt joke sounds amazing

    • @Zhakurael
      @Zhakurael Před rokem +48

      As a non Scottish person the joke kilt me *ba-dum tss*

    • @ROLYPOLYSNONANAKOROBIYAOKI
      @ROLYPOLYSNONANAKOROBIYAOKI Před rokem +14

      As another Scottish person it is truly an amazing joke

    • @TabbyCatq
      @TabbyCatq Před rokem +31

      As a "Person" i found the joke quite funny.

    • @thevillageidiotyeah
      @thevillageidiotyeah Před rokem +18

      @@TabbyCatq as a "person" i found this "comment" and "copying" it "amusing"

  • @moanova1008
    @moanova1008 Před rokem +13

    Hearing The Click say “I love crotching” is one of the funniest things ever 😭

  • @Retro_Red
    @Retro_Red Před rokem +16

    "When I retire, I'm gonna make questionable and cute plushies and there's nothing you can do to stop me."
    I would actually support this. Why would I stop the production of more Mango plushes?

  • @BeatrizViana13
    @BeatrizViana13 Před rokem +685

    random theory here, the cockroach "milk" is probably referring to a substance that the insect produces that resembles the properties of actual milk but since milk is only produced by mammals, they put it on quotations.
    That part of the video didn’t leave my mind, and since I knew I wasn’t the only one I decided to put my thoughts here. Hope that “eases” your “worries”.

    • @thecatherd
      @thecatherd Před rokem +81

      That's basically it. There's a species of roach that gives birth to live young and produces a substance in their guts to feed to their young. The only reason it can't be called milk is because that specifically refers to substances made in mammary glands.

    • @BeatrizViana13
      @BeatrizViana13 Před rokem +21

      @@thecatherd I´m glad I got it right! I didn't know about that tho, that's cool!

    • @JennyEverywhere
      @JennyEverywhere Před rokem +17

      Lois McMaster Bujold created genetically engineered creatures for her Vorkisigan series that ate "Earth descended plant matter" and regurgitated "bug butter" curds, that are nearly a perfect food.
      Except for having nearly no flavor and being the barf of the singularly most disgusting living creature ever designed, it is the "perfect food".
      I think this plot device for her books gave the wrong people some very questionable ideas.

    • @emma-janeadamson4099
      @emma-janeadamson4099 Před rokem +20

      Thank goodness for that. I was thinking of cockroach milk like oat or almond milk - crush 'em up and add fluid...

    • @riverstein7251
      @riverstein7251 Před rokem +15

      @@thecatherd the implications that this is being researched for potential human consumption is somehow more viscerally disgusting than when I thought people were blending cockroaches to make the milk. Someone please draw a fucking line in the milk making industry. The idea of a cockroach dairy farm is going to haunt my nightmares

  • @lakamokolaka
    @lakamokolaka Před rokem +135

    "Ring the bell for meat service," is ethier the start to a horror flim or a "adult movie."

    • @ahryia2476
      @ahryia2476 Před rokem +14

      "Yes, please, I would like... "extra sausage"... ahem, if you know what I mean!"

    • @thecassualty
      @thecassualty Před rokem +5

      And some “meatballs” would be pretty “tasty” too…

    • @pokefan7446
      @pokefan7446 Před rokem +21

      Bonus points if it’s a horror film that starts out with the atmosphere of an adult film before that moment, or vice versa.

    • @dynamicworlds1
      @dynamicworlds1 Před rokem +12

      Either way, the health department probably has some objections

    • @wolvie1618
      @wolvie1618 Před rokem +3

      Why not both

  • @paperbagzi
    @paperbagzi Před rokem +11

    "Intimate meatloaf" is now my favorite phrase

  • @imxr.silkiow
    @imxr.silkiow Před 4 měsíci +5

    18:55
    OMG 😂
    This ad perfectly timed itself so it said:
    And his name was- Chocolate soft serve!
    😂😂😂

  • @zomula7657
    @zomula7657 Před rokem +467

    The Zoidberg one makes sense. Multiple times during the show he calls himself a "medical" doctor with the quotation. It was a long term joke in the show that he was a doctor, but no one ever knew what kind.

    • @kodomoshawn6729
      @kodomoshawn6729 Před rokem +46

      I'm pretty sure he does say in one episode that his doctorate is actually in art history but it's been years since I've seen that episode so I could be wrong.

    • @justincase1898
      @justincase1898 Před rokem +23

      Its because his Phd is in Art History...

    • @jensdeclercq2233
      @jensdeclercq2233 Před rokem +9

      Wasn't he a doctor of various alien species and he just hadn't studied human anatomy? Or am I confusing him with a different character?

    • @zomula7657
      @zomula7657 Před rokem +15

      @@kodomoshawn6729 He does, but he also claims to be a doctor of human medicine. alien medicine, internal medicine, and a few other things as well. The "The Tip of the Zoidberg" episode has him claiming to be an expert alien anatomy and the best in the business.

    • @zomula7657
      @zomula7657 Před rokem +5

      @@justincase1898 That is one of his claims. but he never shows that he is a doctor of anything. Besides if he had a doctorate in Art History it calls into question his comment about the tapestry in the episode "Three Hundred Big Boys".

  • @hopejohnson6347
    @hopejohnson6347 Před rokem +217

    I actually get why they put the nut in "nut" allergies in quotations, because the most common nut allergy is peanuts - which aren't nuts at all, but belong in the same family as peas and beans

    • @azzythesmol
      @azzythesmol Před rokem +29

      Come to think of it, most nuts aren't nuts at all
      Peanuts are legumes, while so many other "nuts" are actually just seeds

    • @fanOfMinecraft-UAs_channel
      @fanOfMinecraft-UAs_channel Před rokem +1

      Or maybe they just mean "to be allregic to your own nuts"?
      LOL I never thought I would ever write this stupid joke on internet

    • @C-SD
      @C-SD Před 10 měsíci

      @@azzythesmol I recently learned that peanuts are fruit. lol

    • @its_diddlydoo
      @its_diddlydoo Před 10 měsíci

      yk what's really a nut? "testicles" 🤤

    • @its_diddlydoo
      @its_diddlydoo Před 10 měsíci

      wow im going "nuts" over this lmfaooo 🤤🤤🤤

  • @lizzistorm7474
    @lizzistorm7474 Před rokem +14

    As a crocheter, I fully approve of your pronunciation 🤣

  • @richerthanastronauts
    @richerthanastronauts Před 9 měsíci +15

    I'm bingeing The Click videos 'cos I'm "happy" with a "fruitful and fulfilling" life that needs no distraction

  • @devinspencer1678
    @devinspencer1678 Před rokem +171

    In the eternal words of Weird Al, "Listen up when I tell ya this, don't you ever use quotation marks for emphasis"

    • @MrsKirk2203
      @MrsKirk2203 Před rokem +7

      This is where my mind went

    • @alexcarboniart2091
      @alexcarboniart2091 Před rokem +13

      I'd never understood that verse, mainly because I'm not a native speaker so I never see amateur signs in english. This video (and your comment) opened my eyes. On something that I never wanted to learn XD

    • @mysticmaknae.
      @mysticmaknae. Před rokem

      @@alexcarboniart2091 yea lol quotes as emphasis never actually make sense, usually it’s best to use asterisks (*) or bold/italicize/underline the word :)

    • @alexcarboniart2091
      @alexcarboniart2091 Před rokem +1

      @@mysticmaknae. Actually I meant that I didn't understand the verse because it's absurd to use them that way. I guess in the US is common place, but in my country they're never used for emphasis XD

    • @mysticmaknae.
      @mysticmaknae. Před rokem

      @@alexcarboniart2091 it’s definitely not common, it’s usually just done by ppl who don’t understand or care about grammar imo

  • @chesh1rek1tten
    @chesh1rek1tten Před rokem +237

    The cockroach milk / "milk" is less suspicious than it seems.
    It's not milk because cockroaches aren't mammals, but it's a liquid that mother's provide to their young.
    But it's inside their broodsack - it's a species that doesn't lay eggs but instead gives birth to live young. They are fed with a secretion - the "milk" before birth.

    • @robinchesterfield42
      @robinchesterfield42 Před rokem +19

      Whoah, really? That's legit freaky. And educatoinal! I have heard of other bugs that give live birth, but that some of them might have an equivalent of "milk" as well, hadn't occurred to me...

    • @arsenicflask
      @arsenicflask Před rokem +20

      cockroach milk can also be shortened to cock milk

    • @karnavi6172
      @karnavi6172 Před 9 měsíci +2

      @@arsenicflask So just "milk" works either way, huh?

    • @Keznen
      @Keznen Před 7 měsíci +1

      @arsenicflask4866 But nobody calls cockroaches cocks; they're called roaches for short.

  • @H3llo_Fr1ends
    @H3llo_Fr1ends Před rokem +12

    I love how he looks like a business man wearing a dress shirt a nice tie his hair styled but he's the most sussy man alive

  • @JSHKsage
    @JSHKsage Před rokem +7

    20:38 THE TOP CORNER SAYS 'CHILD "SAFE"' I CANNOT

  • @strangegaybeing
    @strangegaybeing Před rokem +294

    The click: I'm "not" a furry!
    Edit: Btw me "neither"!

  • @mango1777
    @mango1777 Před rokem +598

    Is it just me or is Click the only one who compliments us by smell. I love that.

    • @equilibrum999
      @equilibrum999 Před rokem +10

      klik Warden confirmed

    • @TmOnlineMapper
      @TmOnlineMapper Před rokem +21

      Yeah right?
      Every day before I decide if I need a shower I just watch one of his videos and if he compliments my smell, I skip the shower ^^

    • @mango1777
      @mango1777 Před rokem +3

      @@TmOnlineMapper lol

    • @-_Tansyy_-
      @-_Tansyy_- Před rokem +7

      @@TmOnlineMapper has not taken a shower is 690,420,666 years...

    • @eggpusher2585
      @eggpusher2585 Před rokem +9

      I feel if he can smell me from Sweden, I'm smelling quite ripe. Even if he likes it, I'm showering the smell away.

  • @_stupidbro
    @_stupidbro Před rokem +5

    30:40 the sad part about this is that if you swap the "Maid Service" parts around, it works just fine:
    If you would like Maid Service, please put the "Maid Service" sign outside your door before 12pm

  • @greyblories7894
    @greyblories7894 Před 8 měsíci +4

    as an asexual, I too have a "nut" allergy 💀

  • @LilyPlaysMusic
    @LilyPlaysMusic Před rokem +53

    When I was like 5 or 6 my birthday cake had quotations around my name, so it said Happy Birthday "Lily", like as if the cake decorators didn't believe that was my real name.

    • @wingedyera
      @wingedyera Před rokem +3

      This is a thing that happens very often with cakes. I know I have spend many a day laughing my ass off on cakewrecks over those

    • @faithpearlgenied-a5517
      @faithpearlgenied-a5517 Před rokem

      They were trying to 'tell' you that you were swapped at birth and they decided to keep you.

  • @jkishhabi
    @jkishhabi Před rokem +125

    Fun fact: the most popular and generally sold out Squishmallow plushie right now is a black and red "dragon" with horns. Of course it looks more like a very soft, squishy egg shaped demon.
    Squishmallows are some of the most emotionally supportive plushies I have found. Obviously, Cliccy should buy them and get them busy on a new line of super successful emotional support demons!

    • @RLight
      @RLight Před rokem +6

      So is it a legit "dragon" or not?

    • @jkishhabi
      @jkishhabi Před rokem +5

      @@RLight it says it's a dragon, but it totally looks more like an emotional support demon. Lol

    • @airilesyankovic2100
      @airilesyankovic2100 Před rokem +3

      Which one? Because I'm very curious what one it is and if it is only in your area.

    • @airilesyankovic2100
      @airilesyankovic2100 Před rokem +3

      Are you talking about the new one that was relased? The Jarik? Or are you talking about the Tiedye one?

    • @jkishhabi
      @jkishhabi Před rokem +1

      @@airilesyankovic2100 The Jarik

  • @waffles3629
    @waffles3629 Před rokem +4

    The "butter" appears to be a knockoff "I can't believe it's not butter" product. So it's actually not butter. Poor Click, he doesn't know all of these random American products which makes the video so much funnier.

  • @bunnychunk303
    @bunnychunk303 Před rokem +26

    As a security guard I can confirm that those quotes are indeed accurate

  • @Raxhe
    @Raxhe Před rokem +75

    As someone who's studying communication and the English language, this is one of many delights that makes it such "fun"

    • @pemanilnoob587
      @pemanilnoob587 Před rokem +1

      Blink twice if you need help

    • @Raxhe
      @Raxhe Před rokem +1

      @@pemanilnoob587 "Blinks" twice (good one haha)

  • @jamiebrooks457
    @jamiebrooks457 Před rokem +66

    10:25
    The thing is, knowing where to put your finger in order to play different notes on wind instruments is called "fingering."
    And yes, we did hear "You need to improve your fingering" as well as "blow harder" regularly when practicing.

  • @strangerdanger1021
    @strangerdanger1021 Před rokem +6

    The cockroach 'milk' thing sort of makes sense, seeing as we actually grind up 'milk' crystals (I believe this kills the roach) to make milk, it takes a LOT of these crystals and isn't very easy to get your hands on.

  • @Odysseus0000
    @Odysseus0000 Před rokem +14

    it is so annoying that most resturants in germany don't accept card payment, only cash

    • @Squid728
      @Squid728 Před rokem

      ???
      Since when
      You have to ask most of the time
      (Last time i was in a restaurant 2019 tho)

    • @Odysseus0000
      @Odysseus0000 Před rokem

      @@Squid728 the local greek resturants or Burger resturants only accept cash, also the next villages Pizzeria and döner-house. sure Mcdonalds and other fast-food-stores accept cards, but many "better" resturants want cash

    • @Squid728
      @Squid728 Před rokem

      @@Odysseus0000 wusste ich gar nicht

    • @iriswaldenburger2315
      @iriswaldenburger2315 Před měsícem

      Häh… KartenZahlung geht doch grundsätzlich…sowas ist gesetzlich vorgeschrieben

    • @Odysseus0000
      @Odysseus0000 Před měsícem +1

      @@iriswaldenburger2315 Nein ist es nicht und in manchen gegenden ist es auch gar nicht möglich weil kein Internetanschluss vorhanden ist

  • @Ac3_Silvers
    @Ac3_Silvers Před rokem +185

    As someone who crochets, your way of saying it makes me cackle. Never change man, your too hilarious!

  • @the_jingo
    @the_jingo Před rokem +441

    You make “great” video as always I’m sure your parents are “proud” of you

    • @axolotdraws9946
      @axolotdraws9946 Před rokem +55

      I’m sure your “parents” are proud of you

    • @Zhakurael
      @Zhakurael Před rokem +31

      I'm "sure" your parents are proud of you

    • @musilovesbooks
      @musilovesbooks Před rokem +26

      im sure your parents are proud of "you"

    • @Mercilessonion
      @Mercilessonion Před 11 měsíci +22

      I'm sure "your" parents are proud of you

    • @lylyedits
      @lylyedits Před 7 měsíci +12

      "I'm" sure your parents are proud of you

  • @ItsMiss5p1d3r5
    @ItsMiss5p1d3r5 Před rokem +7

    5:50 -- it's 'milk' in the same way that it's called soy 'milk'. Soy beans do not have udders. You blend them up in water and strain out the pulp, that's the 'milk'. Same way you make cockroach 'milk'

  • @Saeryfim
    @Saeryfim Před 9 měsíci +5

    24:38 It's fine, we were just trying to help Jim with his dating life! There's plenty of other fish in the sea, after all! Gave him some cement shoes and now he's *sleeping with the fishes!*

  • @Im_Merobiba_
    @Im_Merobiba_ Před rokem +53

    If your “grandma” is “crotching” anything you need to run

    • @missnaomi613
      @missnaomi613 Před rokem +4

      Who is going to tell him that was needlepoint?

  • @PerovNigma
    @PerovNigma Před rokem +203

    1:49 "Are you just telling people to shoplift?"
    No, the person who put up the sign was just hoping a pretty woman would come and say "Ohhh nooo, I don't have any money to pay you with..."

    • @swirlygirl
      @swirlygirl Před rokem +2

      lmao

    • @averycheesypotato
      @averycheesypotato Před rokem +24

      Don’t make such assumptions! How do you know he likes pretty women?
      He might prefer “pretty women,” pretty “women,” “pretty” women or “pretty” “women”

    • @angrybidoof847
      @angrybidoof847 Před 11 měsíci +1

      ​@@averycheesypotatohow do you know it's a man "putting" the sign up?

    • @chaosempress
      @chaosempress Před 10 měsíci +2

      @@angrybidoof847 how do you know it’s a “sign”

    • @angrybidoof847
      @angrybidoof847 Před 10 měsíci

      @@chaosempress how do you know

  • @cerjmedia
    @cerjmedia Před rokem +3

    26:28 the first quotation is actually used correctly, as it is referring to the name of a specific item, but of course, the rest is something else

  • @dead-ringer
    @dead-ringer Před rokem +3

    25:01 This cake would actually perfect for my dad, considering I haven’t seen him in 12 years and the last time I saw him he kicked me and my mother out and threatened to kill us. Great times.

  • @Cyberlisk
    @Cyberlisk Před rokem +115

    18:50 I like how you can see him sleeping, which makes the air quotes really approriate.

    • @henelema
      @henelema Před rokem +5

      "Wow!" "Thanks" for "pointing out" that "subtle detail."

    • @Charle596
      @Charle596 Před 10 měsíci +2

      @@henelemahe’s “doing his job”

  • @Aries73
    @Aries73 Před rokem +255

    Considering roaches aren’t mammals, this story is sus right out the gate.

    • @varisduran1161
      @varisduran1161 Před rokem +41

      apparently the "milk" is a crystalline substance produced by the Pacific beetle cockroach, this species of cockroach is ovoviviparous, which means its young hatch from eggs while still inside the mother

    • @CraftyVegan
      @CraftyVegan Před rokem +9

      @@varisduran1161 exactly right. I remember reading about this a couple years ago and being amazed at how far people will go to avoid drinking oat milk lmao 😂

    • @TheQuietTyper
      @TheQuietTyper Před rokem +13

      Well, considering we say soy milk, oat milk, etc. Milk just means white liquid that's consumed. Of course actual milk is a substance produced by mammalian mothers to feed their offspring. But given what @Varis Duran said, I think milk still works here given other than the mammalian part of the definition, it fits.

    • @antoniaweber8074
      @antoniaweber8074 Před rokem +10

      @@TheQuietTyper wich is why milk was in quotation marks

    • @aaronabbey2604
      @aaronabbey2604 Před rokem +8

      @@TheQuietTyper It's because calling it "milk" is more appetizing than calling it what it really is juice.

  • @TacoBelle100
    @TacoBelle100 Před rokem +3

    13:15 I like to imagine that they have a band of undead rockers playing here - a skeleton on the drums, zombies on the guitar and base, and Dracula on vocals.

  • @elizabethwace8741
    @elizabethwace8741 Před rokem +2

    I think a lot of these people were trying to emphasize the text, but somehow decided to use quotation marks instead of increasing the text size, using a bold font, using italics, or using a different color.

  • @smappositivedance
    @smappositivedance Před rokem +69

    I love how Click's mind always goes to the worst possible direction.

    • @pixelpython7567
      @pixelpython7567 Před rokem +5

      Not always, when he was talking about that guys "wife" he assumed a gay couple
      The quotations could imply that the wife is... not his

  • @awfuldynne
    @awfuldynne Před rokem +34

    13:16 The thing about suspicious quotes is that it's generally not just "not the thing", but something _close to_ the thing that doesn't _quite_ qualify.
    So even if the music is provided by spotify, they still have a live band pretending to play, likely hired for a fraction of the price of a real musician.
    That or they hired Franchouchou and someone involved in making the sign knew the band's secret.

    • @pennyforyourthots3400
      @pennyforyourthots3400 Před rokem +3

      What secret? It's just a totally normal idol group with nothing strange at all about it.

    • @LRM12o8
      @LRM12o8 Před rokem +1

      Yeah, it really sounds like an insult to the band 😂

    • @evenmorebeeliever123
      @evenmorebeeliever123 Před rokem

      @@pennyforyourthots3400 I cackled way too loud at this.

  • @calcutt4
    @calcutt4 Před 3 měsíci +1

    Regarding helmets, when modern military helmets were first used in the first world war, the number of soldiers with head injuries actually rose dramatically. They almost stopped using them before someone realised it was a case of survivorship bias and the people who got head injuries would have just died without a helmet

  • @X-chxrry_blossom-X
    @X-chxrry_blossom-X Před rokem +1

    Thank u for helping me through really tough times. At the moment Im hyperventilating to the point where I feel dizzy and weak because I didnt get my homework work done. It was 9:00pm now its 4:21am and I smiled as soon as the video started. Your voice is soothing and sometimes funny. Thank u.

  • @hiimcrazyfordrwho
    @hiimcrazyfordrwho Před rokem +29

    I proofread an email that was updating others on the health condition of someone. She was trying to quote the words of the source, but only quotes a word at a time so she wrote 'Her health is "tricky" and "changing rapidly."'
    Luckily she removed the quotes when I told her how it sounded.

  • @felipcardoso6145
    @felipcardoso6145 Před rokem +37

    The true story is that they already found a "Qualified" Mechanic but they need another qualified one

  • @Silly_little_Ghost
    @Silly_little_Ghost Před rokem +3

    14:46 “M”D stands for “medical” doctor, his doctorate is in art history
    It’s from a show called futurama. It’s on Hulu

  • @partypooper3836
    @partypooper3836 Před rokem +3

    The most famous quotes in history
    "I'm not a Furry!" -The Click that has a fursona
    "18" -Person from the thumbnail

  • @artistic_lesbian5435
    @artistic_lesbian5435 Před rokem +200

    I have a fever right now and I feel like crap, but laying in bed watching this honestly makes me feel a bit better 🙂

    • @cryst4l_clear456
      @cryst4l_clear456 Před rokem +16

      I have a "fever" right now and I "feel" like crap, but "laying" in "bed" "watching" this honestly makes "me" feel a bit "better"

    • @guardianfish7718
      @guardianfish7718 Před rokem +11

      So many of us here in the comments are sick... It really is the beginning of "autumn"

    • @t.kersten7695
      @t.kersten7695 Před rokem +4

      Have a nice laugh with Cliccy and get well soon.

    • @riverstein7251
      @riverstein7251 Před rokem +1

      I caught a cold and then a respiratory infection. Really is that time of year where cold and flu season kicks my asthma in the ass

    • @gabrielbrock659
      @gabrielbrock659 Před rokem +1

      Lot of sickness going around lately, stay safe!

  • @DasSpaceAce
    @DasSpaceAce Před rokem +21

    "Ring bell for "meat service""
    _Careless Whisper starts playing_

  • @haunthayes2579
    @haunthayes2579 Před rokem +6

    17:15 this is actually true, spite the quotation's.

    • @Charle596
      @Charle596 Před 10 měsíci +1

      i literally told a “friend” this and “she” didn’t believe me

    • @osheridan
      @osheridan Před 5 měsíci

      ​@@Charle596 I'm so sorry your dad thought you were lying

  • @phillystruck9003
    @phillystruck9003 Před rokem +1

    24:45 This perfectly fits where I live, the school shuts down for "bad weather" and then when have the best day in the whole year

  • @JustAnotherCreator
    @JustAnotherCreator Před rokem +103

    7:33
    As a fan of Undertale and Deltarune I had to take a minute to calm down after laughing way too hard because of Click's reaction 😂
    Pure gold, it'll never get old XD♡

    • @cobalt1027
      @cobalt1027 Před rokem +6

      bone

    • @justaperson4656
      @justaperson4656 Před rokem +14

      As an undertale/deltarune fan, that line specifically concerns me. Not because sans is with goat mum, not even the awkwardness of the "eggs husband" joke. Because it implies the nfsw fanart is accurate if sans can "befriend" people

    • @flameindigo8035
      @flameindigo8035 Před rokem +4

      @@justaperson4656 oh god. if ectobodies are actually a thing skeletons can do, i will be so upset.

    • @justaperson4656
      @justaperson4656 Před rokem +5

      @@flameindigo8035 believe it or not, it gets worse. Sans implies skeletons can mimic reproductive organs (whether human and monster is compatible is unknown, but monster x monster is definitely a thing) but there's also an implied digestive system. In undertale, it was explained away by monsters consuming magic foods, and as we know there doesn't seem to be magic in the light world (see Suzie's dialogue upon using magic and toriel cooking using the stove). On top of all that, the dreemurr house (the only house we can enter so far, excluding asgores as he literally only has a fridge with one single item and a mattress on the floor) there is a bathroom complete with a shower, sink, and... Is that a toilet? Okay, I assume Kris eats physical food like most humans... Except toriel gets her groceries from sans's. I doubt sans gets special imports for the only human in town, and I don't see any other grocery shops in town. Therefore, the monsters must all consume human foods, which has the implication that skeleton monsters also have the capacity to consume such food (presumably by mimicking the human digestive system, ecto-organs and all). All this to say deltarune implies that one cursed soul-vore comic CAN happen within that universe

    • @missnaomi613
      @missnaomi613 Před rokem +2

      My 18 year old kid is a big fan of these games, and has shown me that before. So we've already had abundant "laughs" about it!

  • @KyubiChan95
    @KyubiChan95 Před rokem +25

    The rescue "dog" one made me think of Stitch and him being Lilo's "dog"

  • @wonderbugone
    @wonderbugone Před 4 měsíci +2

    I am literally going to use this video to explain English air quotes to my non-native English speaking boyfriend (they're used differently in Korea)
    He asked me the other day and I was racking my brain for an example sentence to use to explain them and just couldn't think of any. This is PERFECT

  • @user-tu5yi4pe2z
    @user-tu5yi4pe2z Před měsícem +2

    The "stop smoking" at 12:47 could also mean it's actually domestic violence if you pronounce smoking

  • @annak8755
    @annak8755 Před rokem +89

    After I become a doctor I will buy a title so that I can officially be a "Lady Doctor" 🤣 so that next time some idiot says "Are you (going to be) a lady doctor?" I can actually say "Yep, I see you have heard about me before!"😉 or "I guess my reputation preceded me!"

    • @stephaniecass6567
      @stephaniecass6567 Před rokem +5

      Omg!!!! That is amazing!❤❤❤

    • @stephaniet1389
      @stephaniet1389 Před rokem

      Do it!

    • @justaperson4656
      @justaperson4656 Před rokem +5

      Don't titles usually cancel each other out? I wonder if you'd be doctor or lady first

    • @TheChronova
      @TheChronova Před rokem +5

      "mommy are we going to see dr lady?"

    • @AhsimNreiziev
      @AhsimNreiziev Před rokem +1

      Great idea!
      Except...... Unfortunately, you would be "Lady [XXXXXX] [YYYYYY], Phd." (or possibly "MD."), instead of "Lady Dr. [XXXXXX] [YYYYYY]".

  • @kakahass8845
    @kakahass8845 Před rokem +20

    I seriously don't understand how these "people" can not notice the quotation marks.

  • @XaranAlamas
    @XaranAlamas Před rokem +1

    The Zoidberg one is a reference to Doctor Zoidberg's questionable medical knowledge and indeed in one episode it is revealed his Doctorate is in Arts, not Medicine.

  • @Someone-qw4kf
    @Someone-qw4kf Před rokem

    This was a really good “video” Click, there were so many “changed” meanings of “normal” things

  • @MrFelblood
    @MrFelblood Před rokem +22

    Cockroach milk is actually made from their heme, that white milky fluid that many insects, arthropods and arachnids have instead of blood. Most species are supposed to taste quite good with butter, so long as you cook them to sterilization temperatures and avoid the digestive tract. Think lobster, crab or white shrimp flavors, but with options that won't trigger iodine allergies.

  • @bleachedkill
    @bleachedkill Před rokem +132

    I think it's hilarious that Click forgot the original use of quotation marks (to show a quote or someones speech in writing) and just sees it all in a negative or lewd light. There definitely were a few normal quotes in this video. Click has been corrupted by the internet.😈

    • @faithpearlgenied-a5517
      @faithpearlgenied-a5517 Před rokem +16

      No he hasn't lol, it's just a video for entertainment. You don't really think he misses the point by accident? Come on. He knows exactly what he's doing, it's just for fun.

  • @GHBSJHUGSJNJIS
    @GHBSJHUGSJNJIS Před rokem

    Can we all appreciate how the click makes the adds actually amazing
    “ i do what no mere mortal can do”

  • @MrMegaPussyPlayer
    @MrMegaPussyPlayer Před 11 měsíci +5

    13:20 MD stands for "medical doctor". That means he has a PhD, but isn't a medical doctor, even if he treats patients when he shouldn't.
    Zoidberg is the "doctor" in Futurama. A crab, with very little knowledge about human physiology.

  • @alrecks619
    @alrecks619 Před rokem +4

    guess the Big Truck Nutz are spreading their wings 28:37

  • @mastermarkus5307
    @mastermarkus5307 Před rokem +40

    33:19 - I can think of a logical explanation for that one: peanuts are a common allergen that are culinarily considered a "nut" but are actually a legume not closely related to tree nuts like hazelnuts or almonds, though people often use them in similar contexts (i.e. in baked goods, ice cream, spreads).

  • @Gaelic-Spirit
    @Gaelic-Spirit Před rokem +24

    The Dr Zoidberg "M"D joke is about his title as a "Medical" Practitioner

  • @apharris01
    @apharris01 Před 28 dny

    Some people think that quotation marks are really just tiny exclamation marks, to be used as a way of adding emphasis. The result is so perfectly opposite to the intent, it's one of life's best little ironies.

  • @fatesvagrant768
    @fatesvagrant768 Před rokem +1

    I think some if these are valid? Cockroaches don't produce actual milk since they are not mammals, is probably just a liquid with similar properties. The robot "priest" isn't actually ordained as a priest, it's just styled after one. Eye doctor is probably in quotes because it isn't the correct term.
    The Zoidberg one implies he has a doctorate but not of medicine. (I checked out of curiosity and he is a Dr of Art History apparently).
    Also the state "your business" one implies to me that they want you to literally say the words "your business" when you get a response (though that is obviously not what is meant).

  • @chaoscat1446
    @chaoscat1446 Před rokem +26

    the fathers day cake feels like a cake someone would give their stepdad that they don't like to be petty

    • @hypsyzygy506
      @hypsyzygy506 Před rokem +4

      Or possibly on their first Fathers' Day as a father? As a sort of 'Hey, you're getting _old_ now you're a _dad_ ' thing.

  • @nevepercival2829
    @nevepercival2829 Před rokem +17

    Zoidberg is a doctor in Futurama and he is a doctor of Art History but they hired him as a medical doctor so he is "M"D for "Medical" Doctor - it's a cool little thing for show watchers who know the show lol

  • @littlelizm329
    @littlelizm329 Před 2 měsíci

    8:19 if customers get trapped in a grocery store, that's the business's loss. A lot of people would feel extremely lucky to be trapped in a building full of food and would eat a lot of food that's normally too expensive for them like beef jerky and peaches.

  • @haon_the_fox8924
    @haon_the_fox8924 Před 28 dny

    12:39 Why is Click’s laughter so contagious?!

  • @cuyohistoriador2858
    @cuyohistoriador2858 Před rokem +14

    Here in México, people in rural areas highlight important words with quotation marks. That was new to me, and for many years confused the hell out of me when i saw signs saing:
    Please "Don't" feed the "Animals"
    "Dangerous" area
    We do "not" accept "alternative" ways of payment
    I'm not making this up. People speak and write different in the same country and it is so wierd

    • @dkecskes2199
      @dkecskes2199 Před rokem

      Maybe that explains what is going on in all of the signs here? And It was more common in a bunch of European languages? Thank you for the explanation, I saw that a lot when I lived in rural Baja several years ago and my Spanish classes did not prepare me for that.

    • @cuyohistoriador2858
      @cuyohistoriador2858 Před rokem

      @@dkecskes2199 So it happens in more places than just Mexico.
      Makes sensei that ir comes from Spain. Mexico usted to be a spanish colony

    • @tookitogo
      @tookitogo Před rokem

      @@dkecskes2199 I haven’t come across it here in Europe, so I don’t think it’s common.

  • @makeupartisttobe
    @makeupartisttobe Před rokem +54

    If Click ever opens a plushie store, I would go there for sure and see what I could fit in to my monthly budget!

    • @thecassualty
      @thecassualty Před rokem +2

      If Click opens a plushie store, my monthly “budget” is going out the window while there’s still space between all the plushies.

  • @nathanpfirman625
    @nathanpfirman625 Před 6 měsíci +1

    “Catfood” is “objectively” the best “drink” on “earth”

  • @skyfrost938
    @skyfrost938 Před rokem

    the "making a difference" being in comic sans just makes it even better

  • @erenender66
    @erenender66 Před rokem +59

    i can actually take a guess at the "Cotton Candy" one at 12:56 . you see, in a lot of countries, cotton candy isn't actually called "cotton candy". for example, Australia calls it Fairy Floss. In China, it's actually called "Dragons Beard"! so I imagine the post is in reference to that.

    • @pennyforyourthots3400
      @pennyforyourthots3400 Před rokem +20

      And then the French decided to be freaks about it and call it "Daddy's beard".
      Honestly, they should not be let anywhere around language

    • @quillmorningstar8713
      @quillmorningstar8713 Před rokem +9

      @@pennyforyourthots3400
      I can't tell if I should be concerned or amazed at how crazy of a move that is.

    • @dead-ringer
      @dead-ringer Před rokem +12

      Brits call it candy floss, which isn’t as interesting as fairy floss or dragon’s beard or as strange as uh…’daddy’s beard.’

    • @IRllyLikeDeathSitter
      @IRllyLikeDeathSitter Před rokem +7

      I used to live in china and I can tell you that dragon beard and cotton candy are different candies. Dragon beard is made by pulling sugar (By hand or machine) into thousands of strands and usually wrap some crushed up peanuts in the middle. We called cotton candy the same as it is in English as far as I know. Unless it is in a different place in china but I don’t think so.

    • @massylia2911
      @massylia2911 Před rokem +3

      ​@@pennyforyourthots3400honestly as someone who spoke French ever since I was a kid, it took me a lot of time to realise that's what it meant

  • @jacobc9221
    @jacobc9221 Před rokem +30

    31:12 She never paid for the apple, so she's a disgruntled "customer" instead.

  • @Scrinwaipwr
    @Scrinwaipwr Před rokem +1

    22:36 I just bought a house and one of the reasons I picked it over the other potential homes is because Aldi is the local shop.