Monster Factory Wrestling Federation: MONSTER MANIA

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  • čas přidán 4. 09. 2024
  • Eleven of Polygon's most dangerous monsters collide in the squared circle at Monster Mania. See friendships tested, rivalries unleashed, and barriers broken. This is the grandest stage-- the final confrontation. This is Monster Mania!
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Komentáře • 1,3K

  • @cutespacedragon1012
    @cutespacedragon1012 Před 7 lety +3192

    *"Sometimes your arms are simply too short to box with God."*

    • @lilanthforester2207
      @lilanthforester2207 Před 7 lety +97

      CuteSpaceDragon I need this on a shirt so bad

    • @OliviaOnline
      @OliviaOnline Před 6 lety +51

      Patrick Gill is an incredible treasure

    • @MrDannyWright
      @MrDannyWright Před 6 lety +18

      Gotta give credit to Punk

    • @KurtisMuniz
      @KurtisMuniz Před 6 lety +11

      said the old cowboy narrator.

    • @straaak3542
      @straaak3542 Před 6 lety +10

      apparently thats a quote from something, not a pat original

  • @mikemchugh7643
    @mikemchugh7643 Před 7 lety +3433

    My heart stopped when pan pan threw randy

    • @gadgetpatch9975
      @gadgetpatch9975 Před 7 lety +458

      I was kinda hoping for a Chiquita Dave + Chiquita Dave tag team, but I'm not gonna complain when we got that righteous pitch by our dear tossboy.

    • @julesroy3469
      @julesroy3469 Před 7 lety +169

      Life is suffering and I swear the chat exploded when that happened... EVERYONE WAS MIND BLOWN

    • @tsukasasagawa1894
      @tsukasasagawa1894 Před 7 lety +59

      Life is suffering A stadium rumbling upset, possibly greater than the '98 upset when The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, sending him plummeting 16 ft through an announcer’s table.

    • @evehalcyon2063
      @evehalcyon2063 Před 7 lety +8

      What's the time Stamp?

    • @coryballs
      @coryballs Před 7 lety +27

      @30:08 it is G L O R I O U S

  • @Smidgenism
    @Smidgenism Před 7 lety +5295

    My roommate pointed out that The Final Pam didn't bring it home until the moment Turbovicki abandoned the fair fight and brought out that weapon..... because Pam was just toying with Turbovicki. Pam wasn't there to win. She was there to break Turbovicki's spirit, to drive her to the point of abandoning her morals. Amazing.

    • @Trash_OpossumMel
      @Trash_OpossumMel Před 7 lety +247

      YES. I LOVE THIS.

    • @ohjeezitslee4043
      @ohjeezitslee4043 Před 7 lety +156

      OH DEAR LORD.

    • @kristinaschulz7540
      @kristinaschulz7540 Před 6 lety +193

      I just thought that Turboviki was giving Pam a massage. Pam was like, no go on, this is nice. Did you not see how chill she was when lying on the mat?

    • @Noeyk200
      @Noeyk200 Před 6 lety +140

      “God forgive me.”

    • @gwashnado5726
      @gwashnado5726 Před 5 lety +38

      this is so important

  • @jaejae9906
    @jaejae9906 Před 7 lety +3776

    Disappoited that they didnt even hold a memoriam for Christopher Christopher Christopher Christopher.
    I mean, he was THE original wrestle boy.

    • @BrentBlueAllen
      @BrentBlueAllen Před 7 lety +351

      All proceeds from ticket sales were donated to The Pebble Foundation, a clone advocacy organization

    • @TheVeteranROB
      @TheVeteranROB Před 7 lety +94

      Next year should have a Pebble Memorial Battle Royale

    • @thebottomlesschaps5295
      @thebottomlesschaps5295 Před 7 lety +106

      If you'll recall, The Pebble died around the same time Jorstin made his wrestling debut.

    • @seanmartinson6249
      @seanmartinson6249 Před 7 lety +109

      Is that:
      Christopher Christopher Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher,
      Christopher Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher Christopher,
      or Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher Christopher Christopher?

    • @vermiforme
      @vermiforme Před 7 lety +110

      Christopher Christopher "Christopher" "the Pebble" Christopher can be easily revived through Rock "the Dwayne" Johnson's flesh centrifuge.

  • @pdlbean
    @pdlbean Před 2 lety +670

    5 years later and "Is this Shinsuke Nakamura's entrance?" "This is Toucan Dan's entrance." still gets me every single time

    • @gamerlysol550
      @gamerlysol550 Před rokem +16

      14:15 for anyone wondering

    • @emohippie21
      @emohippie21 Před rokem +15

      Pat understanding how important it is to not break kayfabe lol

  • @keanulover420
    @keanulover420 Před 7 lety +1951

    Part of me feels like Patrick might be making up some of these wrestling terms but I simply don't know enough about wrestling to refute any of it.

    • @CowboyPete
      @CowboyPete Před 7 lety +252

      He's actually doing a pretty god job lol

    • @AllArmiAllArmi
      @AllArmiAllArmi Před 5 lety +263

      It sounds like he watches endless wrestling because he calls the moves mostly accurately and very specifically. He even tipped us off to which company he watched as a kid by calling a certain move "scorpion death drop."

    • @taakotuesdays
      @taakotuesdays Před 4 lety +14

      glad I'm not the only now struggling on that end

    • @leiram8833
      @leiram8833 Před 4 lety +13

      28:55 Nah, trapezius muscles are totally legit

    • @patrickkaspari4997
      @patrickkaspari4997 Před 4 lety +44

      L eiram not sure if you are being sarcastic but trapezius is a real muscle

  • @Kmechromancy
    @Kmechromancy Před 7 lety +1092

    Y'all are Sleeping on how great of a Joke "Yellow vs Yellow: The Saffron Pile-on" is

    • @alchemicmercury
      @alchemicmercury Před 5 lety +1

      Um.... Please explaine?

    • @ladyvoldything
      @ladyvoldything Před 4 lety +36

      @@alchemicmercury saffron is a yellow spice and it rhymes

    • @alchemicmercury
      @alchemicmercury Před 4 lety +6

      @@ladyvoldything oh cool! Thank you.

    • @percymcplop
      @percymcplop Před 4 lety +8

      Justin is so damn quick :)

    • @garbageboystinkman4159
      @garbageboystinkman4159 Před 3 lety +13

      I thought it was a nickname for Borth, cuz I heard "Saffron Pylon"
      But tbh that sounds like a great entrance nickname, like:
      "TONIGHT ON MONSTER FACTORY! Yellow Vs. Yellow, the Saffron Pylon vs. Maxiumum Potassium! BORTH VS. DAVE!"

  • @IcySprings
    @IcySprings Před 7 lety +935

    I love that the boys gave up on turbovicki the moment they saw that Final Pam was her opponent

    • @Actiondanny
      @Actiondanny Před 2 lety +42

      When I see Final Pam in any context, my sort of gut reaction is to give up on everything immediately.

    • @efgragin
      @efgragin Před rokem +6

      We are all fans of Turbo playing pickle ball.
      We only get to live as second characters in Pams world. For now.

  • @JacobTheLoofah
    @JacobTheLoofah Před 7 lety +1686

    "Borth has a very kick oriented offense" If you recall the borth video where griffin gives him thunder legs, this is 100% canon. I appreciate the research put into this.

    • @alchemicmercury
      @alchemicmercury Před 5 lety +12

      I dont know if its research if they are your characters?

    • @glumbortango7182
      @glumbortango7182 Před 5 lety +12

      I gave your likes that funny number everyone talks about. Aren't I a cool boy

    • @glumbortango7182
      @glumbortango7182 Před 5 lety +25

      @Xavier Carbonneau the months have not been kind to the funny number sadly

  • @RaeLovesGrimm000
    @RaeLovesGrimm000 Před 7 lety +787

    i love how they remember each of their monsters. the way justin goes "awh its chiquita dave" without skipping a beat is the best

    • @NerdySweets3
      @NerdySweets3 Před 4 lety +51

      how could one forget such precious children?

    • @haphazardlark1502
      @haphazardlark1502 Před 3 lety +58

      On the other end of the spectrum is his quiet “oh no” at the reveal of toucan dan

  • @bravetherainbow
    @bravetherainbow Před 7 lety +696

    "You do not want those powerful legs wrapped around you"
    "I mean, you DO... You DEFINITELY want that"

  • @Elinoriastrasza
    @Elinoriastrasza Před 7 lety +834

    such a shame that Melissa was disqualified due to the apple substance abuse scandal, she would have made a fine addition to the roster

    • @rynemcgriffin1752
      @rynemcgriffin1752 Před 5 lety +81

      Elinoria Yeah then recently there’s been the gun overdose scandal with Doctor Sexgun and then there was Freddy Slimeburger’s murder, things haven’t been the same in the MFF

    • @mildlymarvelous
      @mildlymarvelous Před 5 lety +32

      *Mëlissa

    • @ML-tr1hz
      @ML-tr1hz Před 4 lety +1

      Shame indeed

  • @richroberts7512
    @richroberts7512 Před 7 lety +693

    they did the impossible. they got me to watch 40 minutes of the wrestling without any of the story.

  • @apeacebone6499
    @apeacebone6499 Před 7 lety +1082

    I wish I could embroider, so that I could make a sweet pillow case with "Sometimes your arms are simply too short to box with God" over an elegant portrait of the Final Pam.

    • @AClockworkCitrus
      @AClockworkCitrus Před 5 lety +7

      Yes, I would buy a hundred of these

    • @LolCamulous
      @LolCamulous Před 5 lety +8

      Or a lovely cross-stitch piece.

    • @AFarmerCalledChicken
      @AFarmerCalledChicken Před 4 lety +5

      You've given me the perfect idea

    • @apeacebone6499
      @apeacebone6499 Před 4 lety +12

      @@AFarmerCalledChicken ok so I had forgotten about this comment, but: in fact, a comment on a DIFFERENT monster factory video, maybe two years back, finally made me learn to cross-stitch. Show me what you make!!

    • @gregmulax5870
      @gregmulax5870 Před 4 lety +4

      @@apeacebone6499 I feel like I have arrived at this video at the right moment in history. If you ever make this, I will for sure buy it!

  • @BrainBoltG
    @BrainBoltG Před 7 lety +688

    "How did she get out?" Griffin, I'm shocked. As her co-creator you should know above all else that the real question is "How would you keep The Final Pam in?"

    • @Poefeathyr
      @Poefeathyr Před 6 lety +1

      Griffin isn't the Co-Creator

    • @Rachel98246
      @Rachel98246 Před 2 lety +10

      The Final Pam was not created. The Final Pam has no master. She was, is, and always will be a being beyond our mortal comprehension. You cannot create what has always been. You cannot control that which resides outside of time and space as we know it…
      She isn’t a creation of man. She just _is._

    • @raymondfisheriii791
      @raymondfisheriii791 Před 2 lety +9

      She merely allowed Justin and Griffin to recreate her physical form in Fallout 4 so she could return to a world that has long since forgotten her, at her own behest.

  • @mrman643
    @mrman643 Před 7 lety +452

    YOU DO NOT FIX PAM WITH HAMMER, PAM FIX YOU WITH FIST

  • @ArchTalko
    @ArchTalko Před 7 lety +237

    NOTHING COULD HAVE PREPARED ME FOR THAT PAN-PAN RANDY JOHNSON REVERSAL SWEET JESUS

  • @daffycaesar3944
    @daffycaesar3944 Před 7 lety +1033

    If turbovicki won it would have been the zag of the century

    • @thealmightyqueqlqag5260
      @thealmightyqueqlqag5260 Před 7 lety +101

      Let's be honest, we knew who was going to win the second we saw that wild girl.

    • @roundrockb
      @roundrockb Před 7 lety +195

      Her mistake was grabbing the sledge hammer. Once Final Pam knew the rules were off she could unleash her true powers. Turbovicki isn't a good heel to be honest, not very believable

    • @bravetherainbow
      @bravetherainbow Před 7 lety +142

      I got zagged on for sure by Panpan and RandyJohnson with that final move though

    • @ZiraraTheDarkWarrior
      @ZiraraTheDarkWarrior Před 6 lety +17

      If by some off chance Turbovicki had won, it would have only been on account of Final Pam letting her win, since the world bends to her will.

    • @DUCK-3076
      @DUCK-3076 Před 6 lety +13

      I would have burned down my entire neighborhood if The Final Pam lost.

  • @mangomaking
    @mangomaking Před 7 lety +787

    im going to marry The Final Pam and no one will stop me

    • @Jasmine-mh3kf
      @Jasmine-mh3kf Před 7 lety +141

      cheska magalang you'll have to contend with Trash Hulk and, even harder, Metal Husband. Good luck, buddy.

    • @mangomaking
      @mangomaking Před 7 lety +28

      The Phantasm thanks bucko

    • @mangomaking
      @mangomaking Před 7 lety +49

      *****​ i'll fite that cockroach _right here, right now_ (also i think u mean "she" haha)

    • @Sid-el8iz
      @Sid-el8iz Před 7 lety +31

      cheska magalang im going to marry the final pam with you

    • @9oomtar
      @9oomtar Před 7 lety +55

      If there are problems with your baby, she'll fix em. Knows how to make a snack, too.

  • @doctor_puppy
    @doctor_puppy Před 7 lety +738

    This is the only good way to do fanservice, thank you Polygon

  • @briannab.2330
    @briannab.2330 Před 7 lety +626

    Patrick, I thought you were a great Monster Factory guest. Your wrestling knowledge was greatly appreciated. I especially enjoyed the line, "Sometimes your arms are too short to box with God."

    • @Ric_Vicious
      @Ric_Vicious Před 3 lety +3

      This line made me crack up so hard, lol!

  • @VoxyGon
    @VoxyGon Před 7 lety +276

    "That's not good wrestling Toucan Dan, you have to do the things!"
    This Monster Factory Wrestling Federation thing is straight genius.

  • @torielandcheese1076
    @torielandcheese1076 Před 7 lety +887

    absolutely wild wrestle boys. im praying for a sequel to this

    • @gadgetpatch9975
      @gadgetpatch9975 Před 7 lety +43

      I want this so badly.

    • @julesroy3469
      @julesroy3469 Před 7 lety +49

      joshua and cheese I want to see some Knive Dad wrestling and many more beautiful children....

    • @Onitramm
      @Onitramm Před 7 lety +45

      Truck Shepard vs. Knife Dad 2k18

    • @rynemcgriffin1752
      @rynemcgriffin1752 Před 2 lety +6

      It’s been….5 years

  • @anotherwesley7661
    @anotherwesley7661 Před 7 lety +396

    So many beloved, glistening kings and queens of monsterdom! It's a shame Truck couldn't make an appearance because his whole dang face is prohibited

    • @rynemcgriffin1752
      @rynemcgriffin1752 Před 5 lety +44

      AnotherWesley Honestly, I think he was disqualified because his chin would impale anyone he fights

    • @alchemicmercury
      @alchemicmercury Před 5 lety +23

      I think that having a shapeshifting eldritch face disqualifies you unfortunately.

    • @rynemcgriffin1752
      @rynemcgriffin1752 Před 5 lety +18

      alchemic mercury Well that and he probably would instantly snap anyone out of existence who happens to look at him

  • @strangeduckling
    @strangeduckling Před 7 lety +796

    The Final Pam showed mercy upon the young, naive Turbovicki by allowing her to get hits in. The Final Pam may as well have been playing tickle fights with her younger sister. She allowed Turbovicki to lay blows upon her so as to teach Turbovicki and to give Turbovicki a sense of self-worth and self-confidence, just as any loving older sibling would do.
    The Final Pam did not suffer blows--she simply allowed Turbovicki to lay her hands upon her older sister's powerful meat.
    But in the end, The Final Pam had to remind her cocky sister who's in charge.

    • @denizdemirci8653
      @denizdemirci8653 Před 7 lety +48

      if i remeber correctly Pam is Vicki's mom

    • @kigut7443
      @kigut7443 Před 6 lety +42

      oh my god youre RIGHT, parapa is her dad. gotta teach your daughter a lesson

    • @mildlydistressedmaninaturt5452
      @mildlydistressedmaninaturt5452 Před 5 lety +43

      She had to show her daughter that she was strong, but not strong enough

    • @helloimellieful
      @helloimellieful Před 4 lety +5

      This is the best comment

    • @helloimellieful
      @helloimellieful Před 4 lety +10

      @@mildlydistressedmaninaturt5452 it's the only way for turbovicki to grow to her utmost potential

  • @AGuyWithAChannel
    @AGuyWithAChannel Před 7 lety +345

    I'd just like to say: since Final Pam was "killed" by a nuclear weapon in her first episode, it's clear that conventional combat can hurt her - even end her. However, Final Pam's power resides in her ability to come back from death - therefore any victory over her is possible, but temporary. So, this can be canon.

    •  Před 7 lety +43

      Hm hm~ That is not correct, because Pam was not born a god, she earned that power throughout her journey. Pam in her first episode had nowhere near the power of Pam of the last episode. And, given her attire, the Pam in this event was from after the events of those three episodes, at which point she was powerful enough to destroy a game from the inside and definitely could not be killed.

    • @AGuyWithAChannel
      @AGuyWithAChannel Před 7 lety +16

      Interesting... Technically, she got this outfit from The Room of Stuff, which was before Vault 95 - in which she ascended to level 5000. So, this could be between those two events.

    • @AGuyWithAChannel
      @AGuyWithAChannel Před 7 lety +32

      Really, the issue would be if she lost. That would be... madness. Vicki landing a hit is not that odd - the Deathclaw did, as well as various Dimaond City citizens. Her One Punch of Death not shattered Vicki's fragile body like a dump truck over bird bones?
      Maybe Pam held back?

    •  Před 7 lety +12

      AGuyWithAChannel that seems the most likely solution. Maybe she felt bad for Vicki and was afraid it would be too demoralizing to beat her in one hit. Or maybe she wanted more of a challenge.

    • @xalrath
      @xalrath Před 7 lety +47

      it is also worth noting that turbovicki is the most powerful human being to exist, ever, at any point, and is on record as claiming Saitama's workout routine is "alright for beginners." insofar as any of the denizens of the Factory stood a chance against the Final Pam, Turbovicki had the best shot at it.
      shame about the whole "trapped in the ring with an eldritch god of destruction" thing

  • @Mordalon
    @Mordalon Před 7 lety +479

    Toucan Dan looks like if Ganondorf went to clown college in the Jojo's Bizarre Adventure universe.

    • @ConSolo29
      @ConSolo29 Před 6 lety +39

      why would you say something so controversial yet so brave

    • @zeet8251
      @zeet8251 Před 6 lety +9

      Holy shit that's accurate

    • @AFarmerCalledChicken
      @AFarmerCalledChicken Před 5 lety +4

      Are you suggesting he's a stand?

    • @Iynndi
      @Iynndi Před 4 lety +2

      Borth looks a lot like bart

    • @Kralisedra
      @Kralisedra Před 4 lety +6

      That's so specific and yet you managed to nail that right on the head

  • @alibali69
    @alibali69 Před 7 lety +219

    "one time only" if this doesn't happen every year, i'm shutting down polygon.

  • @oliviamae8577
    @oliviamae8577 Před 7 lety +276

    at 18:26 squirtle just kinda rolls out of the ring of his own volition? u ok, squirtle?

  • @CoolattasLab
    @CoolattasLab Před 7 lety +220

    Oh my god! The role reversal with PanPan and Randy Johnson!

  • @ThatPazuzu
    @ThatPazuzu Před 7 lety +169

    three dad's down is my favorite band

  • @Bimon1234567
    @Bimon1234567 Před 6 lety +94

    Pat's accurate pro wrestling commentary turns this whole thing into art.

  • @Jedicake
    @Jedicake Před 7 lety +713

    This is the stupidest best, greatest thing I've ever seen in my entire life.

  • @SpikeRose
    @SpikeRose Před 7 lety +192

    The attention to detail in recreating (almost) every character is honestly impressive!

  • @ColHunnyBear
    @ColHunnyBear Před 3 lety +48

    Pat deserves more credit for so heartily embracing this concept. I love the line "This is Toucan Dan's entrance"

  • @icepelt1001
    @icepelt1001 Před 7 lety +353

    is nobody going to talk about the rumours that Turbovicki could in fact be the daughter of Parappa the Rappa and Final Pam? Was this a potential mother-daughter showdown??

    • @rynemcgriffin1752
      @rynemcgriffin1752 Před 5 lety +6

      Well they are only rumors, like Area 51 or Half Life 3

    • @mildlydistressedmaninaturt5452
      @mildlydistressedmaninaturt5452 Před 5 lety +21

      That’s why Final Pam had to win. She had to show her daughter who was the all powerful God in this universe

    • @Oli.V
      @Oli.V Před 4 lety +10

      I believe that the Final Pam is turbovicki’s patron saint, imbuing her with the skills she exhibits, but when Vicki got cocky and started claiming it was through her own abilities her god had to smite her

  • @bugslumbler
    @bugslumbler Před 3 lety +47

    I have a theory that the Dark Souls match actually was slated to be a ladder match, but #Noid, scorned at not being invited, stole the briefcase before the match could even begin.

  • @devinschwarz
    @devinschwarz Před 6 lety +476

    Does Pat know A LOT about wrestling or is he INCREDIBLE at bullshitting?

    • @kouizumi9484
      @kouizumi9484 Před 6 lety +174

      DEVIN SCHWARZ I'ma let you know that Pat's ringside commentary is WAY better than that of the current announcers who get PAID to talk about matches.

    • @devinschwarz
      @devinschwarz Před 6 lety +113

      I have never and will never watch professional wrestling but this makes me so happy to hear, Pat is such a good boy

    • @breadvelvet
      @breadvelvet Před 6 lety +56

      he's actually guested on the Wrestling On Air podcast before (and his explanation of the Golden Lovers in Japan on Gill and Gilbert kinda got me into wrestling recently lol)

    • @theoneandonlymichaelmccormick
      @theoneandonlymichaelmccormick Před rokem +11

      Hello from 5 years in the future.
      As a wrestling fan, I can confirm that Pat’s commentary is ON POINT.

    • @JasonLihani
      @JasonLihani Před rokem

      Literally just have some thought. I know very little about wrestling but I know a lot of how funny Pat is.

  • @uberXcore
    @uberXcore Před 7 lety +84

    it is very weird having someone competently commentating on this when we're used to the mcelroys screamin' and hollerin but it's so good nice touch guys

    • @uberXcore
      @uberXcore Před 7 lety +4

      truly so happy to be listening to this commentary with these characters so happy

  • @namanari
    @namanari Před 7 lety +89

    the final pam vs. turbovicki, a.k.a an unstoppable force vs. an immovable object

  • @hufflepuff0000
    @hufflepuff0000 Před 7 lety +78

    Toucan dans entrance fuckin kills me

  • @ghoulstreet
    @ghoulstreet Před 7 lety +430

    Kinda sad to see The Final Pam hurting her daughter like that :/ but I guess when to comes down to it, nothing will stop Pam, not even familial bond

    • @Kithara1117
      @Kithara1117 Před 7 lety +108

      Hmm in all likelihood Turbovicki was the offspring of Trash Hogan, and Final Pam cares only for Metal Husband's sweet boys

    • @ghoulstreet
      @ghoulstreet Před 7 lety +110

      MeiaLua Very true, I didn't even consider that. Maybe Turbovicki did so well because she was trying to fight for her mother's love? But no amount of training can turn her flesh to steel, and so she may forever live in the shadow of coffee grounds...

    • @hollandscottthomas
      @hollandscottthomas Před 7 lety +32

      Final Pam must ensure that she is THE Final Pam.

    • @LeonNFG
      @LeonNFG Před 7 lety +33

      Haylee Beth but this is generations past, turbovicky died in a cycling accident to be replaced by turbosusan

    • @ghoulstreet
      @ghoulstreet Před 7 lety +22

      Mikkel Hansen That's what they want you to think

  • @masonlobster
    @masonlobster Před 3 lety +45

    I'm still surprised how close every character looks to their monster factory equivalents

  • @caseywheelwright4769
    @caseywheelwright4769 Před 6 lety +88

    I cannot believe how perfect everything about this is. The custom characters, the entrances they assigned to each of them, even the specifics of each match. PLEASE do another one of these in 2018.

  • @vasaus
    @vasaus Před 7 lety +72

    I love how their first selling point was their boys. Everything comes after the boys.

  • @popsiclesshubert9609
    @popsiclesshubert9609 Před 7 lety +111

    This is the happiest I have ever been watching a video. I don't know if my life will ever get better than the moment The Campaign strolled onscreen.

  • @mrianmagoo
    @mrianmagoo Před 2 lety +8

    Can we really just appreciate the improv phrase "The Saffron Pile-on"? Jesus that's good Juice.

  • @pooolB
    @pooolB Před 7 lety +964

    Can we have Final Pam vs Busto?
    Because, man, I really want to see a fight between the two god-like creatures bent on escaping their worlds to destroy all of reality. It'd be *the* fictional fight of the century.

    • @Fopenplop
      @Fopenplop Před 7 lety +70

      idk if Dragon Ball Z Budokai Tenkaichi 3's character editor is flexible enough, and that's just the only engine that could properly depict their war

    • @milkmann-on1dq
      @milkmann-on1dq Před 7 lety +49

      Fictional?

    • @pooolB
      @pooolB Před 7 lety +4

      That would be so intense, holy shit

    • @Darklava144
      @Darklava144 Před 7 lety +54

      unstoppable force meets immovable object.

    • @davisjames8484
      @davisjames8484 Před 7 lety +19

      can't do it. no machine is powerful enough. and I read if you put the two of them together, you'll go deaf instantly so........

  • @posysdogovych2065
    @posysdogovych2065 Před 7 lety +100

    Haha. "Chiquita Dave doesn't have traditional organs. It's mostly just banana meat in there..."

  • @danamariesmith8960
    @danamariesmith8960 Před 7 lety +51

    pan pan throwing randy johnson sure was the biggest zag of 2017.

  • @thekitty-o-kat
    @thekitty-o-kat Před 5 lety +20

    randy johnson and panpan are the wlw mlm solidarity we deserve

  • @J____L
    @J____L Před 7 lety +751

    Susan Crushbone vs Bone Dogg. This needs to happen

    • @Fopenplop
      @Fopenplop Před 7 lety +129

      unfortunately it's right there in the names. we already know who would win.

    • @J____L
      @J____L Před 7 lety +54

      +Fopenplop That's how Bone Dogg gets you. Don't forget he can stop time and kill you with one kiss.

    • @lenacarey2333
      @lenacarey2333 Před 7 lety +45

      Josh Lane Bone Dogg is also gay. He wouldn't want to use his kiss powers on Susan. His fatal attack is also his fatal flaw.

    • @J____L
      @J____L Před 7 lety +23

      +Lena Carey I'm not sure attraction factors into the lethality of Bone Dogg's kisses. And if it does, it'd still be a devastating blow to Susan

    • @lenacarey2333
      @lenacarey2333 Před 7 lety +24

      of course, you're right, how could anyone deny her advances? she's the goddess of seduction.

  • @landan101
    @landan101 Před 7 lety +60

    This is the kind of behavior that really inspire brand loyalty

  • @joaogomes9405
    @joaogomes9405 Před 4 lety +11

    17:01 the sight of Toucan Dan standing there like a polite lil vascular boi, waiting for squirtle the squirting turtle man to get in position, only to be decked by a right hook directly in the face utterly destroyed me

    • @KiraTesla
      @KiraTesla Před dnem

      I look forward to it every time I watch this

  • @onikoneko
    @onikoneko Před rokem +7

    No matter how many times I watch this, Justin's quiet "Oh no" when Toucan Dan's name pops up leaves me in tears every time

  • @heidiclayton9612
    @heidiclayton9612 Před 7 lety +47

    Patrick's commentary is so on point here. I don't know if the moves he's naming are real but I believe him

  • @theresidentone
    @theresidentone Před 7 lety +55

    Literally every character in this has 1000% more backstory than anyone in WWE

  • @menderash844
    @menderash844 Před 5 lety +67

    it's just so upsetting to me that the raw eroticism of shinsuke nakamura's entrance has been applied to toucan dan, thus forcing me to become attracted to toucan dan

    • @SeleneRoseRM
      @SeleneRoseRM Před rokem +3

      I too am deeply aroused by a grown man making midair finger turkeys

    • @williamousley9794
      @williamousley9794 Před rokem

      @@SeleneRoseRMI think it’s more the confidence on display. And the pelvic movement

  • @weedshrek
    @weedshrek Před 7 lety +81

    I think a canonical explanation for the last fight is that what we were seeing wasn't truly Final Pam, who is still sealed away. She is just so powerful that she was able to manifest her presence in this arena for this event. But of course, a metaphysical projection of her form is not going to have nearly the same god-like powers as the actual thing, allowing a talented athlete such as Turbovicki to land a few blows.

  • @angrykappa
    @angrykappa Před 3 lety +20

    Pan-pan throwing Randy Johnson is still the greatest wrestling moment of all time.

  • @aceikk7565
    @aceikk7565 Před 7 lety +144

    MONSTER MANIA II:
    April 8, 2018
    MATCH 1: Cousin Special Agent (Ghost) , Daytrader Vader, and Dark Vader vs. Truck Shepard, Dino Lansbury, and DAZ
    MATCH 2: Randy Johnson and Panpan (with Elsa and Dr. PhIl vs. Rat Baby and Succotash (With Vape Life)
    MATCH 3: The Boy Mayor and Totino's vs The Junker and Squirtle
    MATCH 4: (The winners of the last two matches will face off for the MONSTER FACTORY TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP)
    MATCH 6: D-Bomb vs. Knife Dad MONSTER FACTORY CHAMPIONSHIP
    MATCH 7: Trüllbus vs. Jorstin -Christopher Christopher Christopher Christopher Memorial Championship
    MATCH 8: G.A.R.F.I.E.L.D vs. Busto vs. Bonedogg -POLYGON.COM championship
    MATCH 9: The Final Pam vs. Todd Howard (If Todd wins, he gains control of Polygon.com)
    this took so long

  • @nonebody2601
    @nonebody2601 Před 3 lety +9

    The tension between Toucan Dan and The Junker was unreal... they only had eyes for each other

  • @ashrishaw5435
    @ashrishaw5435 Před 6 lety +21

    I really love that they didn't forget that Randy Johnson is a woman. I feel like a lot of ppl forget that. She's a stronk giant woman.

  • @Awsonaut
    @Awsonaut Před 7 lety +71

    If this isn't becoming an annual thing I'm going to be really sad.

  • @nathesford9701
    @nathesford9701 Před 7 lety +26

    3 Dads Down is my favorite early 2000s rock band

  • @sonImbigguyinwoods
    @sonImbigguyinwoods Před 2 lety +8

    "Sometimes your arms are simply too short to box with god"- is a amazing quote from this series

  • @suburbanindie
    @suburbanindie Před 2 lety +5

    This is still the greatest single video Polygon has ever made.

  • @brandoncarbaugh7994
    @brandoncarbaugh7994 Před 7 lety +27

    More please.
    Honestly, I'd love to see a series where they just make new monsters in the wrestling game and pit them head to head. Imagine splitscreen character creator action, working from a common starter theme, and then bring in a third voice to sort of flip back and forth between the two.
    "Now Griffin, I see you took the 'squirtle' prompt in an interesting direction here..."
    And then at the end they fight.

  • @OverlordVal
    @OverlordVal Před 7 lety +50

    This confirms my theory that Final Pam is actually the mother of both Undertaker and Kane

  • @SwitchFeathers
    @SwitchFeathers Před 7 lety +52

    this was almost 42 minutes of pure ecstasy.

  • @dovahspy9813
    @dovahspy9813 Před 7 lety +36

    "The choke slam... the choke Pam..."

  • @wowthatsprettycoolhuh
    @wowthatsprettycoolhuh Před 7 lety +113

    Toucan Dan- the Toucan Man with the Toucan Plan.

  • @TheRealAthelis
    @TheRealAthelis Před 7 lety +161

    I got a feeling that this Mayor Boy gonna end up POTUS for some reason

    • @weeseet
      @weeseet Před 7 lety +155

      Only if dogs get to vote

    • @bravetherainbow
      @bravetherainbow Před 7 lety +46

      it's such a catch-22. The Boy Mayor is the only candidate brave enough to support a cause like dog suffrage.

  • @wackodestroyer8864
    @wackodestroyer8864 Před 3 lety +5

    there needs to be another version of this video with the b-class monsters that didn't make the cut

  • @Spo8
    @Spo8 Před 7 lety +20

    I tell you, one thing that really struck me about this match is how he's just like Bart.

  • @starrats444
    @starrats444 Před 7 lety +69

    i cannot believe turbovicki fought her own mom

    • @higgyjiggy2222
      @higgyjiggy2222 Před 7 lety +1

      chloe t SJHSGDJSLDDLALD OH MY FUKCIGMG GOD UR RIGHT

    • @GippyHappy
      @GippyHappy Před 3 lety +1

      Only the child of Pam could have survived that long in the ring against her.

  • @YoSnap
    @YoSnap Před 3 lety +5

    i adore the personality that the animations gave to these characters.

  • @Lantern_Light
    @Lantern_Light Před 7 lety +21

    Im glad Final Pam was a good sport and allowed turbo Vicky some great publicity by allowing her to bring her to the ground for a two count.

  • @hydaen2602
    @hydaen2602 Před 5 lety +5

    I cried at the Boy Mayor and Totino's team being named "The Campaign" this is so good

  • @Chickienugs
    @Chickienugs Před 7 lety +26

    I am loving this NPR announcer commentary.
    NPR Presents: Monster Factory Wrestle Boys

  • @StevenIrwin1985
    @StevenIrwin1985 Před 7 lety +10

    That randy johnson toss had me literally shouting at my computer.

  • @kigut7443
    @kigut7443 Před 6 lety +4

    if monster mania had like two or three more episodes i think i could actually begin to consider myself a wrestling fan. i love this and revisit it often.

  • @emmayoung2089
    @emmayoung2089 Před 7 lety +41

    I would love to see the creation of all these. They all look fantastic

    • @elizabethgreen7713
      @elizabethgreen7713 Před 7 lety +57

      Space Spider luckily, they have a whole series solely devoted to that. it's a good day to be a boy

  • @TurboNemesis
    @TurboNemesis Před 7 lety +5

    i cant get over how perfectly straight-faced Patrick manages to be

  • @kattastic9999
    @kattastic9999 Před 7 lety +33

    She got it in one. "Subscribe to polygon for the boys"

  • @xurkipoo
    @xurkipoo Před 3 lety +9

    It’s been 3 years and it’s still insane how accurate the monsters have been remade

  • @longerwords
    @longerwords Před 7 lety +36

    30:10 IM SHOOK PANPAN MY SWEET BOY

  • @teapotcutie
    @teapotcutie Před 7 lety +92

    "Sometimes, your arms are too short to box with God."

  • @rosegardnz
    @rosegardnz Před 7 lety +18

    this was almost terrible to watch i didnt realize how attached i had become to these beautiful menaces until i had to watch them fight

  • @BlakeMaloof
    @BlakeMaloof Před 7 lety +57

    So this is going to be a recurring event, right? Because this was fantastic.

  • @cinemacynic980
    @cinemacynic980 Před 7 lety +16

    Did I get a Polygon commercial during a Polygon video?

  • @angryyogbuscus1578
    @angryyogbuscus1578 Před 6 lety +14

    "Infinity War is the greatest crossover event of all time."
    *Me, an intellectual:*

  • @hudgynsasdarl6967
    @hudgynsasdarl6967 Před 7 lety +20

    00:00 Intro [Welcome To The Factory]
    00:30 Bort vs. Chiquita
    11:17 We Got Boys [Polygon Advertisement]
    12:21 Junker vs. Toucan vs. Squirtle
    21:14 Birthing Demons [Monster Factory Advertisement]
    23:01 Tag Team: The Campaign vs. Toss Team
    31:43 Hoop Dreams [CoolGames Inc. Advertisement]
    32:52 Turbovicki vs. Final Pam
    41:30 Outro [DLM - Downloadable Monsters]

  • @Renzsu
    @Renzsu Před 5 lety +4

    "Yellow vs. yellow, it's the saffron pile-on" jeebus Justin you beautiful genious

  • @lukecy8187
    @lukecy8187 Před 7 lety +79

    Matchups:
    (Click the jump for spoilers!)
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    00:00 *The Saffron Pile-On* -- Borth Sampson vs. Chiquita Dave
    12:19 *3-Way Souls Smash* -- The Junker vs. Toucan Dan vs. Squirtle
    23:02 *Small Boys and Big Boys* -- The Boy Mayor and Chef Totino's vs. Randyjohnson and Panpan
    32:52 *Ultimate Athlete vs. Ultimate Being* -- Turbovicki vs. Final Pam

  • @LegoLad127
    @LegoLad127 Před 2 lety +5

    This was such a brilliant idea. And all of the fighters act like they genuinely would in that scenario based on the stories that the brothers developed for them, such as Bort Sampson using a heavily leg-focused fighting style, and Randy Johnson and Panpan's throw move was an unreal, impactful character driven moment. Simply brilliant.

  • @vermiforme
    @vermiforme Před 7 lety +234

    WHY NO PEBBLE OR SUCCOTASH?

    • @nickmcelstuck3660
      @nickmcelstuck3660 Před 7 lety +49

      You heck'n weaboo the pebble died, remember? rip sweet angel

    • @vermiforme
      @vermiforme Před 7 lety +48

      Christopher Christopher "Christopher" Christopher will always live on... Besides, all Rock the Dwayne Johnson has to do to make another is to fire up the meat centrifuge.

    • @SvenHolgersson
      @SvenHolgersson Před 7 lety +67

      He was too busy learning vape secrets from Ratbaby

    • @zixise
      @zixise Před 7 lety +8

      steak steak rip... RIP THAT SWEET VAPE IN PEACE!

    • @Tytoalba777
      @Tytoalba777 Před 7 lety +4

      When did Christopher Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher Christopher die? I never got this memo!

  • @Jeremy-vp8bd
    @Jeremy-vp8bd Před 4 lety +3

    I was never into wrestling really, just couldn’t get invested, then, I saw this, and I understood.

  • @ggwrw3400
    @ggwrw3400 Před rokem +3

    Honestly my favorite thing from the entire series to date. It might as well be the Season 3 finale. So hype.

  • @spellinwaiting5290
    @spellinwaiting5290 Před 7 lety +13

    If there's ever a sequel, I need to see Rat Baby and Succotash as a tag team.