I had a friend who was an aupair for a really wealthy family. Her experience was close to modern day slavery. Seems like the plantation mentality continues. They controlled all her hours and paid her for one job but had her do 10 jobs. It was worse because she lived with them. They absorbed all her time even on her days off. There weren't any boundaries. She didn't know anyone in the area until we met. My friends and I helped her leave. She was able to stay in the states with another job. She made enough money and went back home. Treat your aupairs as human beings, and they need their days off. They're not slaves. Don't take advantage of people's kindness or because they aren't from the same country.
When I heard what our au pair had been through at just 18 , responsible for three children under 5 and constantly cleaning, being treated like dirt and underpaid by a nurse of all people! My mama bear mode switched on ! She became an integral part of my family and my the 7 year old adored her ! I do not understand how a grown woman with a degree can expect a teenager to know all that stuff about children and to leave that amount of responsibility on a kid is abuse in itself!
These are both horrendous and unacceptable experiences, but as someone who grew up with au pairs, they become a member of the family. I’m still in contact with the first au pair we ever had when I was seven, I’m now 25. They all said they had great experiences with us. If there was ever extra work ie, ironing (which wasn’t very often), they would alway be paid extra. They always had weekends and evenings off. I became an au pair when I was 22, my best bit of advise is interview the family as much as they interview you, you want a clear understanding of what is expected of you. Obviously people can take advantage and I have heard some horror stories through the grape vine, but my experiences on both sides of the fence have been overwhelmingly positive.
Too many au pairs don't speak up when they are being abused AND the au pair companies should have stricter government regulations. They do next to nothing to protect and advocate for them. I know a nanny that was left with the toddler for a month while the parents and older kids went to Europe. I was furious but she needed them money so she said nothing. Not a day off for a month!
The term “au pair” literally means “equal”. Many many parents who hire an au pair don’t realise this and treat them poorly. Love to see that you’re considering her accommodation so wonderfully.
So true, in the uk there’s (meant to be) a ltd amount of hours they’re meant to work and limited amount if any of sole charge babysitting - they’re not meant to be nannies like some treat then. Looks like she’ll be lucky with this family
Interesting!! I didn't know that I was definitely not treated like an equal during my time as an au pair 😂😂 and neither were most of the other au pairs I met!! (I take that back.. I was treated well by the first family I worked for, they were not wealthy. Just a normal family. The second family however were filthy rich and they were not nice to me or any of the other staff who worked for them)
I was an aupair for an extremely wealthy family. It was the worst time of my life. I basically worked 24/7. No boundaries. I was a slave. The kid really loved me, though, but she was really ill disciplined. It was pure hell and I eventually developed an autoimmune disease. When I was sick they still made me work. I eventually got the courage to resign and they didn't pay me my last paycheck. So that December I was hospitalized and broke. I'm still traumatized after all these years.
@empresszoe9351 - Too often, the wealthy treat others just like a possession. They had no reason to withhold your last salary payment, just because you chose to leave working for them. Sorry to hear what you endured.
@anitarogers2877 Thanks. It was the saddest time of my life stuck in hospital for a whole month with no money while they easily replaced me and offered the next lady thrice my salary while she didn't even do a quarter of the work I used to do. How I knew this was because of one of the cleaners who kept in contact with me after I left. They enjoyed their festive season while I was basically left for dead. Not even a thank you. But life goes on I just know that I deserve better now and I've never been taken advantage of since.
@@empresszoe9351 sorry for the hell u went through but u really should have turned up at their doorstep or gate & made a ruckus till they gave u your owed last paycheck dont let evil people take u for a fool but take back your money & forget about them scumbags i detest rich people who take advantage of the poor but God will judge them God bless u 🙏
Wow you guys are amazing. I was an aupair in my 20's. First stop, Atlanta in December, they put me in an unfinished basement. My "room" was literally freezing and I came from very warm Philippines. They lied to the agency that they will have the "room" prepared before I arrive(never happened). I never had privacy since their teenage boys and their friends always play video games and musical instruments down there. They also made me do all house chores(cleaning after the 2 boys and the 75 year old grandpa with Alzheimer's),cooking, walking the dog and administering the old man's medications. I got paid exactly $153.50/week and worked more than 45 hours. Weekend were supposed to be my day off but on Sundays they forced me to go to church with them then grocery shopping after, so I never really got to have some time for myself. After 4 months, I filed a complaint to my agency and they placed me to another family in Long Island NY. Same story, very cold unfinished basement. I had to wake up before the kids(5:30am) get everything ready, spend time with the kids all day, walk the dog, laundry etc. Also made me go with them to the synagogue eventhough Im not jewish. Treated me so poorly again. I almost gave up and wanted to just go home. I literally just requested to be re-placed since that Jewish family in Long Island isn't working out when a wealthy Italian/Irish family in Connecticut saw my profile from the agency website. Asked if I'm available, pushed the agency to match us right away. I was treated like a family in Connecticut. I had the most beautiful ginormous room with walk in closet. I never felt like I was working, I love the kids with all my heart. They always asked me if I wanted to join them on their trips, I was never forced. Their family in Boston loved me and even gave me presents during Christmas and my birthday. Please people, if you hire an aupair or any worker especially those that takes care of your precious kids, please treat them right. It doesn't take much to be a decent human being.
Protip- my best family was the best because my host mum made my hours clear, communicated well, made the children respect me, and she would get cheese and wine for the two of us every two weeks or so to catch up, sort through any issues or concerns I had about the children and make sure we were on the same page in a relaxed setting. Structure and communication need to be your mantra.
How refreshing for someone to respect you and actually realize your worth and humanity. I'm so glad it worked out. The whole situation seems so fraught with potential discomfort and possibly danger depending on what family/country you are with.
@rattaxi9645 100%, my first "family" was an absolute nightmare. 84 year old man, 4 year old son. Serious neglect even though the father was rich and in good health. The father tried to be inappropriate with me by sneaking I to my room at night. Then quilted me into staying by telling me I'll ruin the little boys life if I left. I reported the neglect and ran. The next family wasn't that much better, alcoholic, cheating father with a hard working mother, daughter (5) would lock eyes with me every morning and pee her bed so that I'd have to clean her urine. She was devil spawn. Hitting and screaming at me every day. The last family was amazing and I think I used up all of my luck having them so I quit nannying after them.
The very last family I nannied for literally I love them with my whole heart. I fly back home often enough so that I make sure I see them. The mom and I are so close. I'm literally going to their house to hang there with my newborn. She sent me a care package after I had mine and just loved me so much. Blessings to the good ones.
Was an aupair and they treated me with so much love and respect they made feel and be apart of their family 19 years later I visit them and now my little baby and kid are in university and finish their secondary school and got to take care of the father in his old age until he passed away last year, they showed family love and still today thank God for them being a blessing to me and helping me to be a blessing to them
Doesn't matter. People abuse the authority because they know that you're alone and far from home. I had a contract that stated my working hours (6hrs a day and 5 days a week). Yet,I was on my feet from 6 am to 6pm! Even on Saturdays, essentially work 6 days a week! I was limited in Internet access. Back then Facebook was barely a thing. No flatrates. Instagram,WhatsApp, telegram etc didn't exist! I needed a minutes card with a code that I would dial in order to call home. Those cards weren't sold everywhere so I'd have to go into town to get them. My experience in Vienna as an aupair traumatised me! It took me years to recover! If I wrote everything I went through-id have a book! You wanna hear something that will shock you? The agencies that you use are on your side until you sign the contract. After that? No protection whatsoever. Things got to bad to the point where my family got in touch with our embassy. The embassy threatened legal action on the agency and that's when they started to reach out and act like they cared. It was bad!!!! My advise: get in touch with those people. Make it plain that your daughter has someone in her corner. If you have contacts in that country, reach out so they know that she is not alone. If not, give her your country's embassy info - just incase. Make it very clear that if anything is t right, she can come back home IMMEDIATELY!!!! If I had the technological access we have now, things would have been different. I was so scared and didn't tell my family on time. When I did, they moved so fast and I was rescued. People can be so shockingly cruel. Thank God for family and therapy!
If you really want to be a nanny you need to be independent and walk if they ever devalue you. I had several positive experiences but I also was underpaid and felt like I was not supported emotionally. I was 20/21 years old and the parents were only 10 years older than me. The mom and I really got along the first summer but wealth changes people. The 2nd summer I was treated as the help. I was super depressed and would have quit mid summer if my dad had let me. He said I made a commitment and I had to stick it out. I was so ready to go back to University at the end of the summer.
I was an aupair 11 years ago and I was literally a modern day slave. I was overworked and underpaid way below the legal limit. I did a calculation and I was getting £1.10 per hour!!! And from that little money I would spend for my bus tickets and college education which I was going to one evening / week. I was supposed to have my own bedroom, but the child's toys and clothes were kept in my room too. On what was supposed to be my day off, they would come in my room early in the morning making noise and picking the clothes to take the kid to nursery for the day (instead of preparing that the night before so I have my privacy). I wanted to have a lye in on my "day off". Also the mother would allow the kid to come in my room in my day off and jump on me or on my bed to wake me up although I wasn't on duty to entertain. It was supposed to be my time off work. I had to do all the house chores, washing and ironing the clothes for everyone, cook for everyone, clean (including the windows). And she told me off for not cleaning her underwear stained of period blood which she would leave to soak in a bucket for weeks and expected me to clean for her. She also told me when she was leaving her used period pads fill of blood around (she was "forgetting" to put it away she said - quite frequently too), I was accused of lacking initiative to pick it and throw it away for her. I was expected to be on call all the time until I asked to have a set schedule. One evening I had a date for dinner (2 hours after the end of my shift), but she wasn't home and couldn't get through to her to find out where she was because I couldn't leave the kid unattended and go out. It ruined my date night, my only time I had to be with adults and have mature conversations, rather than only be with a child. She missed so many first moments of her child's development. I would take videos to show her what she missed out on. Most days she would come home.after I cleaned the kid and put him to sleep already, so he wouldn't even get to see her. Over the months, naturally, the child started calling me "mom" and calling his mom by her name (which is what I was calling her). It was interesting how nobody taught the kid to do that (quite the opposite, I would remind him he can only call me by my name and his mom he should call her "mom"). He naturally started calling mom the person who was carrying for him the majority of time. Auparing is what helped me get into this country, but it's simply a modern day slavery method for the majority of people it seems. I met other au pairs and most have similar stories to mine.
I’m so sorry you had to go through that, the blood stained underwear and pads left around sound DISGUSTING! Glad to know you don’t have to put up with that woman anymore! I think it’s sweet the child called you “mom” tho 💖 s/he’s innocent and has love & appreciation for you!
Geesh if you were working for me, all I wouod ask is for you to help me with my kids and do dishes. You could have the weekends off well except for dishes. I hate dishes it hurts my neck. That is because I have 3 herniated disks. But geesh you would have been treated as family. Given a pay check extra if you needed it. And allowed to have a boyfriend over. And over night and dinner and movie night if you chose to do so. My kids were old enough to understand relationships and how they worked. They also understood privacy. I would not have treated any ine like crap. And you couod have used my car until we we were able to get you one. If and when you left for a better job or marriage I wouod have kept you I n my car insurance for 6 months to a year. It can take time to set up your own place ect. God I hate when people treat other like crap. It is so wrong.
Having a really open conversation about expectations at the start is really important. It's a really big thing to be living in someone else's house with their way of doing things, and making them feel welcome, but also being clear with expectations is important. Hours, time off, eating meals together, what tasks, pay, travel, access to car, what evening babysitting, who is in charge of set up and clean down in the evening etc etc. (was an au pair for 9 months when I was 19 and learned a lot)
Yes! A schedule and how “extra” baby sitting will be handled. I was an aupair and hated it because I recieved my schedule the week before and was shamed for wanting to do something the weekend of my birthday (but also shamed because I didn’t want to go out all the time? But I couldn’t plan anything). I was also given much more responsibilities than I had signed up for (like cleaning). Be clear and have a set of responsibilities and treat them like an adult (like they are) if you want to change it it should be treated like a discussion with an adult who lives with you. I hated being in my 20s and treated like I was a child. An aupair isn’t a 24/7 helper who doesn’t need anything or a break. A contract is 10000% necessary to be able to refer back to. And a schedule so no one is being taken advantage of
I had a new au pair every 6 months growing up. I hardly ever saw my parents and formed no permanent attachments at a young age. I’m in therapy now. One of parents’ friends had an au pair for several years. Their son called for her over his mom when he was sick, scared, etc. He never got close to his parents and is now in a drug rehab center. Just sharing my experiences.
That is horribly sad. My boy is 4 and even though I like my 'me' time. I'm with him all the time except when he goes to pre-school. I love him so much, I would die for him. I'm so sorry you didn't have the love you deserved!
It’s sad some parents just think they can dump their kid on someone else and never try to spend time with them. It’s different than an au pair but when I was a little kid I had a childminder and I went to house everyday while my parents were at work. By the time I got home I usually had dinner and then went to bed and my dad usually didn’t come home until after I was asleep. But my parents made sure to set aside plenty of time for me on weekends and found unique ways to bond. I loved my childminder but I loved my parents more. Often I would cry when my mum dropped me off at the childminder in the morning because I didn’t want to be separated from my mum, even though I had been going to my childminder since I was like 1 years old.
I was a nanny for a wealthy family outside of DC and was treated horribly. Hands down the worst experience of my life. I starved for weeks. I wasn’t allowed to leave to shop for groceries. I was’t allowed to eat anything from their kitchen. The nanny before me had left some packets of crackers and dry noodles. And that’s what I ate for weeks. I lost almost 30 pounds. Until my mom came and rescued me. And she flew with me back home.
There are evil people out there who use situations like this to torture others and control them in hateful ways. I don't understand how some of these au pairs let these nasty people treat them so badly. If they refused to let you go to the store, why not just put your foot down and tell them you will do as you please bc your an adult and you will make your own decisions and just go and if they don't like it to find someone else? I don't get it. They don't own you. I don't care if I was working for the queen and the president I would say hell no if I was being treated like this.
Same here! I now am a marketing agent and I only have a highschool degree. I make more and I am not constantly being looked at as the help that can do everything at a snap of a finger. ☺️
Yup! Rich people problems! Who the hell can afford an au pair !? Only spoiled rich people! Raise your own children, do your own housework, cook for your family (that’s even if you know how to cook)! 🤦🏻♀️ 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️I would bet the woman in the video doesn’t even work!
@@jamymclellan8709Yup! 💯agree These ‘moms’ don’t work, they dump their kids with the nanny so they can go shopping or to lunch with friends. That’s not being a parent, then they wonder why their own kids don’t like them and the kids end up with issues. But mom needing time to herself everyday is more important 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️💯selfish💯
Lol I'm not from Australia, but what I know of it is that some parts of it get really hot and humid in summer. So here some comments from my point of view (no garanty of accuracy): 1. this garage isn't going to stay cold in summer or warm in winter 2. there are only 2 tiny windows at the door - that's not enough to ventilate or get sunlight through 3. I don't see an air conditioner, but maybe I just didn't see it 4. it's not a "normal" door, it's not insulated - insects are going to come in (I hope there are no dangerous spiders in your region) --> at least have a mosquito net with a "door" like that! Where I'm from these doors are used for farms and I can tell you from experience that they don't keep insects from coming in... In conclusion: I hope Elsa is accustomed to hot and cold weather and is immune to poisonous animals. 😅 The idea of the "extra" home is nice, but the implementation is severly lacking.
How nice of you. I was an au pair in New York City. my host family put me in a closet in living room, literally they transferred their closet into a tiny room for me to sleep in. Their ac/heater unit is in the closet, they asked me sleep with the closet door open so their living room could get the air. Wtf! They have a summer vacation house is Long Beach island, and they put me to sleep on a love seat sofa on balcony, I felt I was a dog to sleep on a balcony! This comment is for the families out there who would like to hire an au pair, if you could not provide a proper space for a living in nanny, please don’t hire one! Au pair or nanny is not a slave to your family! Please be respect and treat her properly.
What exactly is nice about this? Bc they live in a tropical climate, and the au pair is basically living in a concrete box without a proper window, unsealed doors, and no AC.
Do people have au pairs that DONT live in? Seriously wondering why you couldn’t just come over in the morning at a certain time and leave at a certain Time. Kids sleep through the night so I’m trying to understand how so many au pairs go from this great idea for help to a slave boxed in?
@@jaj4706 au pair is an international program, which is like the other person said, it is a “ cultural exchange “ program. The au pair her/himself comes to another country, lives in the local host family and helps with their kids, meanwhile she/he gets the opportunity to experience life in a different country. On the other hand, host kids could experience and learn the culture,experience even another language from their au pair. It should be an equal opportunity and experience for both sides. Unfortunately, this program in the United States is almost like a modern slave job. Total different than in Europe. The Non live in ones is simply as nanny, which is more expensive hourly than paying for the au pair.
It's a closet storage space on the way to a bathroom... NOT a bedroom... Unless we're missing something. We never saw the other side of the room. I bet there's junk or boxes overthere. No window!
And that bed filled the entire space directly in front of the door! No room to get in/out. No room for nightstand. I don't think this is for a real person at all.
To those saying aww how special. Byron gets hot and humid. It’s a tropical climate. This room is a concrete box with no window or aircon/reverse cycle heating. Louvres that high won’t make much difference and the mosquitoes will be insufferable in the wet season. Summer 29deg down to 11deg in winter. Have to wonder why locals weren’t hired (they know better) and they had to “fly in” a young naive nanny. If you don’t live in Australia you have no business defending this post. Putting in a mirror and hand soap from Kmart will not hide the fact that this will be a hot box in summer and an ice box in winter. I doubt it’s even up to code. Saying “my sister got one” (an au pair) goes against how Australians treat others. We do not speak about human beings like they are a convenience that we just picked up at the supermarket.
Exactly this. Everyone in Australia is equal regardless of position and treated as such. I too was disgusted in the ‘my sister got one’ comment. Made it sound like she was purchasing something to own and use, if you know what I mean. Has her living in a cement box.
@@natashab3412 I don’t know what you’re implying with regards to this post, but to use our First Nations people to support your defence of this person is gross.
@@soullessnight6539 Right? This house looks like it has a few proper bedrooms with windows, sunlight and aircon/heating. Basic human comforts in a house that obviously is able to fulfil them, yet chooses to put the vulnerable young woman who will be taking care of her children in a tiny concrete cubby. Further to that, according to theAAPFA- Australian Au Pair Families Association’s Code of Conduct: Standards of the Host Family’s home: “All of the Host Family’s home has to be of an appropriate standard, both for the Au Pair and the children in care. -The Au Pair room should be of reasonable size, being adequately furnished with a bed and a wardrobe being the minimum, has both a functional *window* and functional door. Depending on location, adequate heating and/or cooling needs to be provided”
This Romanian Au pair I know has a microwave and fridge , in the attic converted huge ensuite room . She earns $400 per week. She doesn’t have to cook or clean. The lady of the house cooks at weekends and freezes the dinners for the week . And they have a cleaner . They both are doctors and work . The children are at school . So she can do what she likes when the kids are at school . Another parent picks up the kids from school . The aupair has to make sure she’s home when the kids arrive from school . She heats the children’s food from the freezer and serves them their dinner . And clears the table. And fills the dishwasher . And that’s it ! She can eat what she likes from the fridge and gets a home made meal from the freezer if she likes. She doesn’t work weekends.
That sounds awesome but also sounds unlikely. If this was my au pair I think she’d be doing the kids laundry and putting it away and keeping the toys picked up. I also think I’d expect that she could prep the kids a fresh hot meal or snack after school. That would be it though. In comparison I know a doctor paying half that for someone who does laundry 2 times a week totaling around 8 hours and while the laundry is running the dishwasher gets loaded /unloaded, and she sweeps mops and I want to say might start dinner don’t quote that dinner part. There’s an expectation that a minimum of x loads are done each shift and that she’s cleaning while waiting on the laundry not just snacking or napping. It seems more than reasonable.
Genuine question, is air conditioning a thing in Australia? I know some countries like Germany do not generally have it. Either way, I have to imagine living in a hot concrete box is undignified.
I was an au pair in France years ago. Everyone was kind and, as the mother had worked in England as an au pair, she was up on what was required etc. and made sure my health care was organised. I lived in Paris and Lake Geneva with them. It was a positive experience but sometimes quite lonely.
really brightened my day to hear you brag about your new servant. Made me forget about cancer, arthritis, and pinched nerve, and the bills that are due. Clips like this are an inspiration to us common people. I’m sure the soaps and lotions will make her content in the cell you have provided for her. Now if you’ll excuse me, I must scrub my own toilet.
I was an au- pair heard about bad treatments. Always picked up cute kids, thought if parents are bad at least I can love the kids😅. Luckily had nice people and memories of the kids still melts my heart.
I met an au pair whom was living with one of my patients when i was a home health aide....she told me such bad stories of what she and others she knew had gone through. Alot of the "host families" wouldn't really pay them for much,and when they did it wasn't much and then they'd give them a list of things to pick up for the household and wouldn't pay them back. They think that since they live and eat at their home,they don't have to pay them much or at all for all the things they do,and they tend to not give them any proper time off since they live there
Make sure to treat her well. I had a friend who had an au pair and they made sure to respect her time off and stay to her official responsibilities. Remember she’s a young girl away from home, treat her like you’d want a younger sister treated at her first job. She’s here to learn and enjoy her time abroad as much as she’s here to help you and your family. Good luck. Love the set up
Back in 2016, when I was 18 I flew to the UK to be an Aupair. I had to look after 3 kids, all boys of 11, 9 and 7 years old. I was supposed to stay 9 months but I gave up after 3 and half. The mom was never around and even when she was in the house she would just stay in her room. She said I would have to do just a bit of cleaning around but I ended being the sole person cleaning the entire house. I had to cook and iron the clothes.. I could have handle if it was just that but whenever I had time to rest the youngest would kick continuously on my door when the mom was doing night shifts. I had so much stress that I started to have eczema on my arms. I had to leave for my mental health. So I said that I couldn’t stay the 9 months and that I’ll be going back to my country after the month was over. She said that if I was going to leave I had to leave today ! It was raining outside ! I had never took the subway alone before and before leaving she treated me has if I had stolen something from their place ! The worst experience of my life. I somehow managed to find my way back home.
Was she a British national? That kind of behaviour is very unusual from a true Brit. I know it was common with a certain kind of person living here or who has moved here. They view au pairs as servants. They view servants as a lower class of person. Though when I lived in the Middle East, expat Brits often treated their housegirls/houseboys like slaves.
I was an au pair and had such an amazing experience with my family that we are still very much part of each other’s lives 10 years later. To the point, I live now in the same country as them and we go on vacations together and celebrate major life events. I was so lucky to have them!
This looks like a garage by the look of the doors. You have decorated beautifully but honestly it isn't a space a person should live in, especially if there is no window.
In Australia the requirements for a bedroom are different than America. American requires a window, a door and an exposed closet. Australia requires a door, a certain room size, and light - the light can be from a window or skylight or the next room over or a combination of these like a tiny keyhole window and light from the next room over. I believe the room size is 3 meters wide .. that’s three yardsticks. The best rooms have room for the bed and side table and a wardrobe (armoire). Totally different standards.
It's like you got a play thing, a life-size doll. I can see how this set up might be a kind gesture for a guest staying a few days, but your employee/guest is not sleeping over for a night-she's living there. Her accommodations need to be similar to yours, perhaps not in space, but in effect.
I was an au pair at 14. I was still going to high school. I took care of the baby, and I cleaned the whole house daily, washed dishes, and did laundry - they used cloth diapers, so you can imagine what I had to do. They wanted to keep me, they were both teachers and they told me they would tutor me. But I was way too young to have such a serious and difficult job permanently. I should finish my studies at a regular school and enjoy my youth. So, I declined. They treated me well, paid me like an adult, but it was a hard job!. I thought the little house in this video is cute but too claustrophobic and lacked windows.
Don’t “get” an au pair (they aren’t an object, treat them as a person) just because your sister has one. She probably needs the childcare, you work from home and don’t want to raise your own kids. That is a garage, not a “special guest suite with a separate entrance” it has no windows, and is basically a jail cell with some decor here and there. Hang stuff up on the walls, rugs, etc! I wouldn’t want to stay there
@@DaisytheSchnauzerit’s also going to be hell for anyone to use during summer in aus. Byron can get super hot and humid, and that’s a bad combo in a poorly ventilated room without AC
@@texasktea yes and I’m fairly certain even in liberal pretend Sydney bong smoking Byron, that the “shed/guest suite” would not be council permit compliant given the lack of windows, lack of ventilation and bodge job en-suite
We had a lovely Au Pair, she was so sweet and did an amazing job of looking after my sister and I. She looked after us Monday to Friday, and had weekends to herself, usually coming home for dinner or lunch, and to hang out and sleep. She went on to marry and have kids, and comes back to visit from time to time. When it works it is a great situation for the parents, kids, and Au Pair. Good luck!
"Like, my sister got one, and I wanted to keep up with my sister, so I got a human to take care of my kid because I'm too lazy! So, I'll put this grown person in a one room box, with a bathroom, and they can just live there with no life and like yeah!" That's all I heard.
I personally was AuPair. Don’t overwork her, don’t ask for things in her free time just because “she is in the house anyways”, if you need extra help ask kindly, then give her some extra free time in return. Respect her as a human and not just another employee who happens to live with you. This program can be wonderful, but unfortunately many families f*cked it up! Totally!
In Australia the requirements for a bedroom are different than America. American requires a window, a door and an exposed closet. Australia requires a door, a certain room size, and light - the light can be from a window or skylight or the next room over or a combination of these like a tiny keyhole window and light from the next room over. I believe the room size is 3 meters wide .. that’s three yardsticks. The best rooms have room for the bed and side table and a wardrobe (armoire). Totally different standards.
I don’t think a lot of people realize that for these girls and boys (there are male au pairs as well), the au pair is an Exchange Program, which they PAY to participate. They aren’t going to another country with the purpose to work and make money. They pay for the experience of living abroad and being immerse in the culture, and the best way of doing that is living with a local family. Yes, they get paid for the hours they work while they are there, but the amount is ridiculously low. I believe the families have the option to pay more, but most of them pay the minimum which is something like $200 a week, if not less.
I have been a nanny for over 20 years and enjoy it but I strictly never live with a family and go by a year to year contract. Many have been wonderful but some have absolutely tried to use me and Im fast to leave them after my contract is up. Please never think that she should go above and beyond what you are paying her for. Nannies do light cleaning up that involve the children but we are not house keepers unless agreed upon and given adequate pay for the extra service. If given extra tasks then she should always be reimbursed by pay. Good luck to you both
@carmencastillo9101 Me, too! When I hire on with people, I tell them plainly that I enjoy housework and can’t stand being in a mess so I will do an excellent job caring for their children but I will also keep the house nice. I also prefer jobs with more children and all my positions have been coming on when the mom was having her last baby so they never needed me longer than 3-4 years. Yes, they get used the luxury, but I appreciate the salary and freedom I have.
OK FIRST OFF - image living here. Get rid of the useless blanket ladder and put in a desk with an area for a laptop and a tv. Also um girl - THE FLOOR IS CONCRETE- do you know how cold that is on your feet? Put in a nice area rug. Also instead of the useless stool how about an actual chair? Sorry but I know you tried to make it “cute” but it is NOT functional for someone to actually live in.
Oh man and the bed being dorectly opposite to the door in like a hall way instead of around that little corner. Who wants their bed directly facing the door?! Aaaaa scary
I hope aupairs are properly protected these days. In the early 90s Imoved in with a family in london aged 17, they had 6 year old triplet boys, Her husband had just left her, she had a full on executive job. She was staying out drinking after work, kids refusing to go to bed saying 'Where's mum'.. it was crazy for a while but I really liked them all and I was quite streetwise so I stuck it out. I had an enormous 5 bedroom, 3 bathroom house to keep clean, gave kids breakfast, walked them to school, got on with cleaning, ironing, some batch cooking, picked kids up from school, entertained them, fed them, clocked off at 6pm.. Monday to Friday. Lots of evening babysitting in the week. Eventually she met someone who moved in fairly quickly. They offered me a little more money to do 3 definite nights of weekly babysitting and all his horrendous shirts and clothes to iron too. (6 peoples ironing!) He clearly wanted an aupair that didn't ever go out and have a life.. asked me to not go out at all in the day!!! Popped home randomly to check on me. Afrer nearly 2 years they said 'we dont think you're happy here, think about it'.. well that was clear they wanted me out so I left and moved to my sister's. They got a nice German aupair after who stayed in amd baked. The thing is when she went away with her new fella skiing for a week, her ex hubby was supposed to stay so I wouldn't be alone.. Well he was a rich alcohol who would pop by after work then bugger off home and leave me with the kids every night. One night I called the police as it sounded like someone was breaking in. I never told her any of this when she came back as I didn't want her to argue with her ex, the kids loved their dad too. I even visited them after I left with birthday presents etc.. I stayed in touch for years and still see their lives via Facebook. . Anyway, after all that, aupairs got a raw deal for many years. So I hope they are more respected now and paid properly!
Please understand that you DO NOT HIRE an au pair. You HOST them. They are not staff- they are international guests who come to have and share a cultural experience. The worst thing you can do is treat them like employees. They are family.
Yes! Any £ they get is classed as pocket money, they’re not employees and shouldn’t be expected to work as one. That’s the uk rules although many families choose not to research them
@@BetterMe981No, not the same. Read up about it. They are not servants or employees, even though they are getting paid. It IS a cultural "exchange" program. The rules are extensive. They cannot be treated as an "employee" either, and expected to do whatever the parents want. It's very different, but it does get abused, sad to say.
"Soooo" (In my valley girl voice) "I got to get my own girl to take care of my own children. The Uni said I need to do this. I need to virtue signal to all my friends that I'm a good person who can rent a human."
Dude. It’s not that bad of a job. I did it weekends and summers for 4 years. The dad would let me drive his M3 when he went away on business, the mom her Mercedes trucks. They let me borrow the Vespa whenever I wanted. I got paid well at $20 an hour. Room and board. Vacations. My own guest sweet. It can actually be a pretty sweet gig.
@@gabrielpetersen8528au pairs can be worked 10 a day up to 45 hours a week and this year their pay in the states was increased from just under 200 to 225 a week...still like it's a great gig?
Well if this was being funny, where is the funniness? You are only mocking her. If this woman has a lot of money, and she needs help and there are lots of people wanting to come to the area, to explore it. It's a win-win. Not everyone van go to be a exchange student. So this is another great way to explore the world.
@@Wenixi go rent yourself, I don't care. Hell, work for free and be a voluntary slave. You'd have to be blind if you believe people with a lot of money "need help." There's always a line of poor people they can exploit, if this system continues this way. More and more people are being exploited so she can rent a human to take care of HER children. Sounds like you're an exploiter yourself. We'll just chalk that up as you being a "hit dogs holla" kind of person.
I had an au-pair when I was little. She never left haha. Lived with us for three years, then moved close to us, studied , married and had a child. My parents are like grandparents to her child. I’m now 28, she is part of our family and her family are like relatives to us. Amazing things can happen out of a caring relationship with an au-pair and some will be friends forever! So I really appreciate you trying to make her feel home ❤
Awwwww … I’m confident Elsa will have a memorable experience with this family , the fact this family is showing hospitality right off the bat is genuine of their character. Elsa you’re blessed to be a part of this family . Been a nanny for over 30 yrs and absolutely love it. ❤️ Love from sunny Florida USA ☀️❤️
Why does 'My sister got one' bother people so much? I'm an interpreter... If a potential client called and said someone told them to 'get' an interpreter for their multilingual meeting, I would not be offended. When I needed a divorce lawyer, I 'got one'. If I need an electrician, I 'get' one. I could say 'recruit/ find/ hire' but 'get' doesn't in any way imply slavery. It's what you do when you need or want a service of any kind. Get it? I think the problem here is that people see childcare as menial work, and are just _waiting_ for the person hiring a live-in child minder to say or do something to imply that their nanny/ au pair is subhuman. Guess what? As a mum, one of my biggest fears is that someone who is taking care of my son will treat him badly because they hate me... He is defenceless. It would be so easy to do. And as a mum, I know that caring for a child is GRUELLING work. So if I ever 'got' an au pair, I'd try to make them comfortable and cultivate a good relationship. They are doing VITAL, HARD, IMPORTANT work. If you see 'getting' childcare as belittling a person, perhaps it's time you 'get' a therapist.
I think it has to do with the fact that Au Pairs are taken advantage of quite a bit. Plus, the room is tiny, lacks insulation, windows, seems like a terrible place to unwind. Pieces are being put together.
@@nuclearwessels2078 I don't know the op. Does she have better facilities to offer? Is there a large room with windows where the au pair could stay, and she's opting to stick her in the worst part of the property? If so, then I understand the concern... but by the way she talks about it, I get the impression that that is where ANY long-term guest at her house would stay... I look at that room and I see complete privacy, a place where the au pair can have some independence and space from the family...
If she’s from a different country, make sure you pay her a fair wage and benefits just like you would a nanny. Having been a nanny for 10 years I met many au pairs who were viscously taken advantage of. One wasn’t allowed to leave the house, but came to a playdate while the parents were out of the country! We were stunned.
I don’t think you understand what benefits are found when giving underprivileged immigrants partial pay. When you’re given room and board, and your citizenship in your country let’s you buy more with less from a higher paying country you actually can make a better living than most U.S. citizens. In some areas you can buy a house for less than 10k, which takes about 3-6 months to save, which can be saved when rent is extremely cheap or free. Essentially by requiring the same wages, it then defines international labor as “not feasible” as you then are competing with the U.S. workforce. Yet with a reduced pay, you can see more interest in hiring international employees. When coming from a 3rd world country, and temporarily living in a 1st world, you are then able to find key information and concepts that normally would have not been fed to your algorithm, or what interests you. So essentially you’re getting access to billions... trillions of dollars of information physically built out.... I’m sorry but shame on you. You don’t know how an economy works... and with your lazy expectations you could easily see more underprivileged American citizens and 3rd world country citizens. It’s best to be grateful rather than think this is your country unless it really is your country.
@@TheWheatGoddess Interesting view. How do you safe this 10k in 3-6 months when being payed 240-450 a month ? And to know how economics work (by exploitation of other countries and workers in and from other countries) is not such a praiseworthy thing that you could put “ shame.on you“ on somebody who doesnt according to your oppinion.
@@lovepeace2373i dobt think 250 a month would even cover the roundabout flight from my crappy cheap country to the US or Australia, let alone save something.
We all need help with things. No one does everything alone. A good nanny/au pair can enhance the relationship between parent and child. It's not a cop out anymore than using a doctor, driver, tutor, cleaner, dry cleaner, plumber etc is. Sure, some overuse them, but not all. And no, I'm not saying this because I have a nanny (I don't)
@@DreamBeliefidk how to be my own doctor or repair my plumbing , but I know and I can raise my own kids. Unless you’re working, hiring a nanny is ridiculous. I’d be so sad if I had to be with a nanny all day while my mom didn’t even work.
Yeah it’s strange to want other people raising your children…especially not family and these children form attachments to these nanny’s and then when there’s an issue they never see them again. It’s odd I don’t really get it if you can hire a nanny then you don’t need to work seems obvious.
@DreamBelief, everyone uses a doctor. Even doctors use a doctor. As a Parent, I did all the drop-off, pick-ups, took them to and from practice. Helped with homework, practiced their sport with them, cooked, cleaned, laundry, team mom, volunteered (not really by choice) to help with sport activities, went to games and competitions. Did most yard work, hubby helped when he was home. I did and still do, all the home repairs or renovations, And worked a 40+ hrs weekly. Yes, it was exhausting and I never had any free time. But if I didn't want to do all that, I shouldn't have had my children (4). I am not alone. Plenty of women do it without help Everyday.
As someone who has done this before I'd rather have a beautiful Blank Slate on which I can make my own, rather than someone completely decorated place that I would never feel like is my own space
I think this is very pretty accommodation. And im sure the girl will be a good part of the family. Not a slave. If I was an au pair I would appreciate my own space and time apart from others
I feel so dumb, but what does this mean? I thought it was normal to prep guest rooms day of arrival or like hours beforehand so nothing gets dirty or dusty and everything is fresh
This is supposed to be your guest suite? So basically you live in a big luxurious house and your au pair ( and your guests before her) will be in a tiny closet with no window... How generous of you...
Guys it’s not perfect but it’s the thought that counts and she made a beautiful environment for her. I’m sure she’ll make changes for it when needed come on.
The windows above the doors are nice but one or two more in the wall would be better, it would feel less claustrophobic in there, also maybe a mini fridge and some sort of electric kettle.
Had au pairs growing up- they were always treated like our big sisters and if it wasn’t a good fit, my parents would work hard to help them connect with a new family. My parents were protective of the free time they had with me and my sisters (bc they worked a lot), so our au pairs got to be off the clock as soon as my parents were home and all weekend long. They had no weekend curfew- just no bringing home strangers from the club!
As a caregiver/Au pair can help clean home and children,organize, create a framed mindset fornthe child to learn while following the parents guidance, enrichment, another trusted person in the child's life to successfully create the skills for life, cook and or educate safety in living spaces. Ideally it's what support the child can use and to supplement the parents village in case there are not enough hands or time.❤
This explains what it is my aunt did it for years raised the kids etc even was with the family through death n divorce. She now gets paid to literally house sit n watch their dog 😂😂
People that can afford a live in nanny can also afford a housekeeper; and they often have both. I have actually never met anyone with a live in nanny that didn’t also have a housekeeper. The housekeeper often came first before the live in nanny. People that want a live in nanny want one for a reason. I’d rather them pay a professional to take care of the kids than to have them neglected instead or even worse, have one of the parents stay home and resent the kids for having to do so. I used to judge people that had live in Nannie’s until I started thinking about what the alternative looks like. It’s not my children that will have a hard time bonding with me or having a relationship with me at all, it’s theirs, so why should I care…why should anyone. As long as the kids aren’t being abused, silently judge and keep it moving
I thought it was just me - it doesn't even have windows from what I can see! Even hostels have windows 😭 Poor Elsa - this is an aesthetically pleasing dungeon lol.
I was brought out from England to work in NJ looking after twins as a nanny. I was not an au pair. However after 2.5 years my relationship with their mother had disintegrated. She was quietly manipulative and very insulting. She would walk into my bathroom when I was in the shower which was the last straw for me. I decided to leave and had an awful row with her sister, when I was told “You can’t leave, we own you” that’s when I walked out the door. My photo albums were destroyed which I truly regret but I did manage to get back most of my belongings. The father of the babies hadn’t a clue and was the nicest man. I wished I could have explained everything to him.
@@jamymclellan8709 than I guess I was more of a nanny. Although I did live in the home on weekends and during the kids and my summer breaks! But still. It’s sounding like I was more of a part time live in nanny.
I used to be an aupair in Europe for 3 different countries (Denmark,Netherlands and Norway) and that experienced I used it to come here in Canada 🇨🇦 I am now Canadian Citizen and I am very grateful with my humble beginnings
They are cheap. Also they themselves make fraction of what a local nanny would charge. Most of the costs goes to the organization/ company. The company says ithat the job isn’t about money but experience. Not saying there are not good families but I had to save couple of girls from that experience
This is not necessarily true. It all depends on the family. Sure there are some who do but it can be a huge help to have that extra set of hands and a lot of times they become like another member of the family. I spent three years working as one. And it wasn't for a rich family either. But being able to live rent free in New Jersey is huge. You also have to understand that the reason a lot of them don't make a lot of money is because a place to live is included, meals are included you don't have to worry about water electric any of those bills. Mine even added me to their car insurance and I didn't have to pay any of that even for my own personal vehicle. If I have been living on my own and having to pay for and buy all of those things, I would have had way less than $100 a week I was making. I basically had $400 a month that I could do whatever I wanted with and was actually able to save up a decent ammount.
There are no windows and Australia gets very hot - especially in the summer. Have you thought of a solution to that? Natural light and air - when the doors are closed.
Treat her like family. Pay her well. She’s taking care of your treasures. Make sure her day off is completely her own time. Go on vacation. Show her around and make sure you have clear cut expectations. Yes, I speak from experience. If you treat her like gold she won’t ever leave you in a lurch. She will want to stay a long time!
good luck to Elsa. i remember that vid of groups of live-in nannies in China meeting up to just occupy the streets and not be at their residence/place of work. some were dancing, others were relaxing, but a good chunk were straight up sleeping in boxes to get some rest on their one day off :( shoutout to all the live-in service workers. i’m sure it’s hard to establish and or keep boundaries when you live w an employer. Personal assistants too. y’all be safe.
I couldn't respect a woman who couldn't raise my children and blame myself for making a bad choice. Its the tough times and challenges that bond you to your children and make you aware of where they need you in their lives.
@@evaszonyi4384 Maybe I dont like people being put in rooms without natural light. Maybe because I work in the construction industry. Maybe because I dont care what you think Karen.
![Katie [your twin mom bestie]](http://yt3.ggpht.com/jtfuJIZ0XUEFDulr9dcZPP96E__7DhQsCqbgoVCg7OKlONymDbPPpvonK4k7V3tDbmHh-K3L0w=s48-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj)
I had a friend who was an aupair for a really wealthy family. Her experience was close to modern day slavery. Seems like the plantation mentality continues. They controlled all her hours and paid her for one job but had her do 10 jobs. It was worse because she lived with them. They absorbed all her time even on her days off. There weren't any boundaries. She didn't know anyone in the area until we met. My friends and I helped her leave. She was able to stay in the states with another job. She made enough money and went back home. Treat your aupairs as human beings, and they need their days off. They're not slaves. Don't take advantage of people's kindness or because they aren't from the same country.
When I heard what our au pair had been through at just 18 , responsible for three children under 5 and constantly cleaning, being treated like dirt and underpaid by a nurse of all people! My mama bear mode switched on ! She became an integral part of my family and my the 7 year old adored her ! I do not understand how a grown woman with a degree can expect a teenager to know all that stuff about children and to leave that amount of responsibility on a kid is abuse in itself!
These are both horrendous and unacceptable experiences, but as someone who grew up with au pairs, they become a member of the family. I’m still in contact with the first au pair we ever had when I was seven, I’m now 25. They all said they had great experiences with us. If there was ever extra work ie, ironing (which wasn’t very often), they would alway be paid extra. They always had weekends and evenings off. I became an au pair when I was 22, my best bit of advise is interview the family as much as they interview you, you want a clear understanding of what is expected of you. Obviously people can take advantage and I have heard some horror stories through the grape vine, but my experiences on both sides of the fence have been overwhelmingly positive.
Too many au pairs don't speak up when they are being abused AND the au pair companies should have stricter government regulations. They do next to nothing to protect and advocate for them. I know a nanny that was left with the toddler for a month while the parents and older kids went to Europe. I was furious but she needed them money so she said nothing. Not a day off for a month!
I guess ive been extremely lucky cause all my families have been amazing! 😮
People with money are usually the worst types of people because they are so out of touch with reality
The term “au pair” literally means “equal”.
Many many parents who hire an au pair don’t realise this and treat them poorly.
Love to see that you’re considering her accommodation so wonderfully.
😊😊
So true, in the uk there’s (meant to be) a ltd amount of hours they’re meant to work and limited amount if any of sole charge babysitting - they’re not meant to be nannies like some treat then. Looks like she’ll be lucky with this family
Interesting!! I didn't know that
I was definitely not treated like an equal during my time as an au pair 😂😂 and neither were most of the other au pairs I met!!
(I take that back.. I was treated well by the first family I worked for, they were not wealthy. Just a normal family. The second family however were filthy rich and they were not nice to me or any of the other staff who worked for them)
If that true then why did she use the term hire?
@@sunflower6372 Because you still apply for the position. She's being hired for the family position of their au pair.
I was an aupair for an extremely wealthy family. It was the worst time of my life. I basically worked 24/7. No boundaries. I was a slave. The kid really loved me, though, but she was really ill disciplined. It was pure hell and I eventually developed an autoimmune disease. When I was sick they still made me work. I eventually got the courage to resign and they didn't pay me my last paycheck. So that December I was hospitalized and broke. I'm still traumatized after all these years.
so sorry
@@creel7343 Thank you.
@empresszoe9351 - Too often, the wealthy treat others just like a possession. They had no reason to withhold your last salary payment, just because you chose to leave working for them. Sorry to hear what you endured.
@anitarogers2877 Thanks. It was the saddest time of my life stuck in hospital for a whole month with no money while they easily replaced me and offered the next lady thrice my salary while she didn't even do a quarter of the work I used to do. How I knew this was because of one of the cleaners who kept in contact with me after I left. They enjoyed their festive season while I was basically left for dead. Not even a thank you. But life goes on I just know that I deserve better now and I've never been taken advantage of since.
@@empresszoe9351 sorry for the hell u went through but u really should have turned up at their doorstep or gate & made a ruckus till they gave u your owed last paycheck dont let evil people take u for a fool but take back your money & forget about them scumbags i detest rich people who take advantage of the poor but God will judge them God bless u 🙏
Wow you guys are amazing. I was an aupair in my 20's. First stop, Atlanta in December, they put me in an unfinished basement. My "room" was literally freezing and I came from very warm Philippines. They lied to the agency that they will have the "room" prepared before I arrive(never happened). I never had privacy since their teenage boys and their friends always play video games and musical instruments down there. They also made me do all house chores(cleaning after the 2 boys and the 75 year old grandpa with Alzheimer's),cooking, walking the dog and administering the old man's medications. I got paid exactly $153.50/week and worked more than 45 hours. Weekend were supposed to be my day off but on Sundays they forced me to go to church with them then grocery shopping after, so I never really got to have some time for myself. After 4 months, I filed a complaint to my agency and they placed me to another family in Long Island NY. Same story, very cold unfinished basement. I had to wake up before the kids(5:30am) get everything ready, spend time with the kids all day, walk the dog, laundry etc. Also made me go with them to the synagogue eventhough Im not jewish. Treated me so poorly again. I almost gave up and wanted to just go home. I literally just requested to be re-placed since that Jewish family in Long Island isn't working out when a wealthy Italian/Irish family in Connecticut saw my profile from the agency website. Asked if I'm available, pushed the agency to match us right away. I was treated like a family in Connecticut. I had the most beautiful ginormous room with walk in closet. I never felt like I was working, I love the kids with all my heart. They always asked me if I wanted to join them on their trips, I was never forced. Their family in Boston loved me and even gave me presents during Christmas and my birthday. Please people, if you hire an aupair or any worker especially those that takes care of your precious kids, please treat them right. It doesn't take much to be a decent human being.
Protip- my best family was the best because my host mum made my hours clear, communicated well, made the children respect me, and she would get cheese and wine for the two of us every two weeks or so to catch up, sort through any issues or concerns I had about the children and make sure we were on the same page in a relaxed setting. Structure and communication need to be your mantra.
How refreshing for someone to respect you and actually realize your worth and humanity. I'm so glad it worked out. The whole situation seems so fraught with potential discomfort and possibly danger depending on what family/country you are with.
@rattaxi9645 100%, my first "family" was an absolute nightmare. 84 year old man, 4 year old son. Serious neglect even though the father was rich and in good health. The father tried to be inappropriate with me by sneaking I to my room at night. Then quilted me into staying by telling me I'll ruin the little boys life if I left. I reported the neglect and ran. The next family wasn't that much better, alcoholic, cheating father with a hard working mother, daughter (5) would lock eyes with me every morning and pee her bed so that I'd have to clean her urine. She was devil spawn. Hitting and screaming at me every day. The last family was amazing and I think I used up all of my luck having them so I quit nannying after them.
The very last family I nannied for literally I love them with my whole heart. I fly back home often enough so that I make sure I see them. The mom and I are so close. I'm literally going to their house to hang there with my newborn. She sent me a care package after I had mine and just loved me so much. Blessings to the good ones.
As a nanny that sounds AMAZINGGG
@luvsucks1234 that is amazing! I'm so glad you have that connection, and it sounds like one that will last a lifetime ❤
Was an aupair and they treated me with so much love and respect they made feel and be apart of their family 19 years later I visit them and now my little baby and kid are in university and finish their secondary school and got to take care of the father in his old age until he passed away last year, they showed family love and still today thank God for them being a blessing to me and helping me to be a blessing to them
Wow!!! This is beautiful 😮👶👨🦳
So glad you worked for good people ❤
Beautiful ❤
Aww that’s beautiful . I’m glad it went well for yoy😁🥰❤️
What a beautiful story! 💕 I love that your kid was able to care for the father before he passed. Full circle :)
My daughter is an Aupair. I would recommend an agency that requires a written contract with what the aupair's responsibilities are.
Please count me in .❤
Doesn't matter. People abuse the authority because they know that you're alone and far from home. I had a contract that stated my working hours (6hrs a day and 5 days a week). Yet,I was on my feet from 6 am to 6pm! Even on Saturdays, essentially work 6 days a week! I was limited in Internet access. Back then Facebook was barely a thing. No flatrates. Instagram,WhatsApp, telegram etc didn't exist! I needed a minutes card with a code that I would dial in order to call home. Those cards weren't sold everywhere so I'd have to go into town to get them. My experience in Vienna as an aupair traumatised me! It took me years to recover! If I wrote everything I went through-id have a book!
You wanna hear something that will shock you? The agencies that you use are on your side until you sign the contract. After that? No protection whatsoever. Things got to bad to the point where my family got in touch with our embassy. The embassy threatened legal action on the agency and that's when they started to reach out and act like they cared. It was bad!!!!
My advise: get in touch with those people. Make it plain that your daughter has someone in her corner. If you have contacts in that country, reach out so they know that she is not alone. If not, give her your country's embassy info - just incase. Make it very clear that if anything is t right, she can come back home IMMEDIATELY!!!!
If I had the technological access we have now, things would have been different. I was so scared and didn't tell my family on time. When I did, they moved so fast and I was rescued. People can be so shockingly cruel. Thank God for family and therapy!
Please drop the company name. 🙏🥺
If you really want to be a nanny you need to be independent and walk if they ever devalue you. I had several positive experiences but I also was underpaid and felt like I was not supported emotionally. I was 20/21 years old and the parents were only 10 years older than me. The mom and I really got along the first summer but wealth changes people. The 2nd summer I was treated as the help. I was super depressed and would have quit mid summer if my dad had let me. He said I made a commitment and I had to stick it out. I was so ready to go back to University at the end of the summer.
Yes definitely my parents would never even allow me to become an au pair without an agency
I was an aupair 11 years ago and I was literally a modern day slave. I was overworked and underpaid way below the legal limit. I did a calculation and I was getting £1.10 per hour!!! And from that little money I would spend for my bus tickets and college education which I was going to one evening / week.
I was supposed to have my own bedroom, but the child's toys and clothes were kept in my room too. On what was supposed to be my day off, they would come in my room early in the morning making noise and picking the clothes to take the kid to nursery for the day (instead of preparing that the night before so I have my privacy). I wanted to have a lye in on my "day off". Also the mother would allow the kid to come in my room in my day off and jump on me or on my bed to wake me up although I wasn't on duty to entertain. It was supposed to be my time off work.
I had to do all the house chores, washing and ironing the clothes for everyone, cook for everyone, clean (including the windows).
And she told me off for not cleaning her underwear stained of period blood which she would leave to soak in a bucket for weeks and expected me to clean for her. She also told me when she was leaving her used period pads fill of blood around (she was "forgetting" to put it away she said - quite frequently too), I was accused of lacking initiative to pick it and throw it away for her.
I was expected to be on call all the time until I asked to have a set schedule. One evening I had a date for dinner (2 hours after the end of my shift), but she wasn't home and couldn't get through to her to find out where she was because I couldn't leave the kid unattended and go out. It ruined my date night, my only time I had to be with adults and have mature conversations, rather than only be with a child.
She missed so many first moments of her child's development. I would take videos to show her what she missed out on. Most days she would come home.after I cleaned the kid and put him to sleep already, so he wouldn't even get to see her. Over the months, naturally, the child started calling me "mom" and calling his mom by her name (which is what I was calling her). It was interesting how nobody taught the kid to do that (quite the opposite, I would remind him he can only call me by my name and his mom he should call her "mom"). He naturally started calling mom the person who was carrying for him the majority of time.
Auparing is what helped me get into this country, but it's simply a modern day slavery method for the majority of people it seems. I met other au pairs and most have similar stories to mine.
I'm so sorry for what you have been through.. I hope you are in a better place right now ❤
Thank you. I am actually. I have a normal and stable job now 😊
@@roxyutiosh7037 so happy to hear that
❤ from South Africa 🇿🇦
I’m so sorry you had to go through that, the blood stained underwear and pads left around sound DISGUSTING! Glad to know you don’t have to put up with that woman anymore!
I think it’s sweet the child called you “mom” tho 💖 s/he’s innocent and has love & appreciation for you!
Geesh if you were working for me, all I wouod ask is for you to help me with my kids and do dishes. You could have the weekends off well except for dishes. I hate dishes it hurts my neck. That is because I have 3 herniated disks. But geesh you would have been treated as family. Given a pay check extra if you needed it. And allowed to have a boyfriend over. And over night and dinner and movie night if you chose to do so. My kids were old enough to understand relationships and how they worked. They also understood privacy. I would not have treated any ine like crap. And you couod have used my car until we we were able to get you one. If and when you left for a better job or marriage I wouod have kept you I n my car insurance for 6 months to a year. It can take time to set up your own place ect. God I hate when people treat other like crap. It is so wrong.
Having a really open conversation about expectations at the start is really important. It's a really big thing to be living in someone else's house with their way of doing things, and making them feel welcome, but also being clear with expectations is important. Hours, time off, eating meals together, what tasks, pay, travel, access to car, what evening babysitting, who is in charge of set up and clean down in the evening etc etc. (was an au pair for 9 months when I was 19 and learned a lot)
You’re exactly right!
I could not agree more.
It’s great that you chose the best for your family and yourself. Support is so crucial.
That's a really helpful checklist you gave here, I think!
Yes! A schedule and how “extra” baby sitting will be handled. I was an aupair and hated it because I recieved my schedule the week before and was shamed for wanting to do something the weekend of my birthday (but also shamed because I didn’t want to go out all the time? But I couldn’t plan anything). I was also given much more responsibilities than I had signed up for (like cleaning).
Be clear and have a set of responsibilities and treat them like an adult (like they are) if you want to change it it should be treated like a discussion with an adult who lives with you. I hated being in my 20s and treated like I was a child. An aupair isn’t a 24/7 helper who doesn’t need anything or a break.
A contract is 10000% necessary to be able to refer back to. And a schedule so no one is being taken advantage of
My sister “got one”…🥶
Lolol
Right 🤯😂
😂😂🤣
I mean she might have just misspoke but…. 🫤
Ok. So that did sound “off.” I wasn’t sure if I was being too sensitive or not.
I had a new au pair every 6 months growing up. I hardly ever saw my parents and formed no permanent attachments at a young age. I’m in therapy now. One of parents’ friends had an au pair for several years. Their son called for her over his mom when he was sick, scared, etc. He never got close to his parents and is now in a drug rehab center. Just sharing my experiences.
That is horribly sad. My boy is 4 and even though I like my 'me' time. I'm with him all the time except when he goes to pre-school. I love him so much, I would die for him. I'm so sorry you didn't have the love you deserved!
Oh my. Sorry. Hugs.
It’s sad some parents just think they can dump their kid on someone else and never try to spend time with them. It’s different than an au pair but when I was a little kid I had a childminder and I went to house everyday while my parents were at work. By the time I got home I usually had dinner and then went to bed and my dad usually didn’t come home until after I was asleep. But my parents made sure to set aside plenty of time for me on weekends and found unique ways to bond. I loved my childminder but I loved my parents more. Often I would cry when my mum dropped me off at the childminder in the morning because I didn’t want to be separated from my mum, even though I had been going to my childminder since I was like 1 years old.
I was a nanny for a wealthy family outside of DC and was treated horribly. Hands down the worst experience of my life. I starved for weeks. I wasn’t allowed to leave to shop for groceries. I was’t allowed to eat anything from their kitchen. The nanny before me had left some packets of crackers and dry noodles. And that’s what I ate for weeks. I lost almost 30 pounds. Until my mom came and rescued me. And she flew with me back home.
They didn't expect you to eat?? This is mind boggling!
Wtf
There are evil people out there who use situations like this to torture others and control them in hateful ways. I don't understand how some of these au pairs let these nasty people treat them so badly. If they refused to let you go to the store, why not just put your foot down and tell them you will do as you please bc your an adult and you will make your own decisions and just go and if they don't like it to find someone else? I don't get it. They don't own you. I don't care if I was working for the queen and the president I would say hell no if I was being treated like this.
As a mum I would have kicked their arse! To treat my daughter like that!!!
Omg😮😮😮so sorry
Rich people problems. I used to be a nanny and quite frankly I’m tired of working for rich spoiled families that don’t appreciate my hard work
Many times, they're just too needy and dependant for one au pair.
I like working for people that actually need a nanny because they work. My first nanny position was with 2 people that didn't work. 7:30- 6pm
Same here! I now am a marketing agent and I only have a highschool degree. I make more and I am not constantly being looked at as the help that can do everything at a snap of a finger. ☺️
Yup! Rich people problems! Who the hell can afford an au pair !? Only spoiled rich people! Raise your own children, do your own housework, cook for your family (that’s even if you know how to cook)! 🤦🏻♀️ 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️I would bet the woman in the video doesn’t even work!
@@jamymclellan8709Yup! 💯agree These ‘moms’ don’t work, they dump their kids with the nanny so they can go shopping or to lunch with friends. That’s not being a parent, then they wonder why their own kids don’t like them and the kids end up with issues. But mom needing time to herself everyday is more important 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️💯selfish💯
The staging was very cute but isn't that just a garage?
Is where dad gets in trouble.
In Australia this qualified as a bedroom.
It's a storage space where I'm at. Talking about feeling at home is a bit over the top 😂
In Byron Bay, this would probably fetch about $500k, especially if there was an off street park😅😂
Lol I'm not from Australia, but what I know of it is that some parts of it get really hot and humid in summer. So here some comments from my point of view (no garanty of accuracy):
1. this garage isn't going to stay cold in summer or warm in winter
2. there are only 2 tiny windows at the door - that's not enough to ventilate or get sunlight through
3. I don't see an air conditioner, but maybe I just didn't see it
4. it's not a "normal" door, it's not insulated - insects are going to come in (I hope there are no dangerous spiders in your region) --> at least have a mosquito net with a "door" like that!
Where I'm from these doors are used for farms and I can tell you from experience that they don't keep insects from coming in...
In conclusion: I hope Elsa is accustomed to hot and cold weather and is immune to poisonous animals. 😅 The idea of the "extra" home is nice, but the implementation is severly lacking.
How nice of you. I was an au pair in New York City. my host family put me in a closet in living room, literally they transferred their closet into a tiny room for me to sleep in. Their ac/heater unit is in the closet, they asked me sleep with the closet door open so their living room could get the air. Wtf! They have a summer vacation house is Long Beach island, and they put me to sleep on a love seat sofa on balcony, I felt I was a dog to sleep on a balcony! This comment is for the families out there who would like to hire an au pair, if you could not provide a proper space for a living in nanny, please don’t hire one! Au pair or nanny is not a slave to your family! Please be respect and treat her properly.
What exactly is nice about this? Bc they live in a tropical climate, and the au pair is basically living in a concrete box without a proper window, unsealed doors, and no AC.
@@opal6202I believe from the context of the rest of their comment, their initial statement should be read as sarcasm.
Do people have au pairs that DONT live in? Seriously wondering why you couldn’t just come over in the morning at a certain time and leave at a certain Time. Kids sleep through the night so I’m trying to understand how so many au pairs go from this great idea for help to a slave boxed in?
Au pairs should be for "cultural exchange" not hire someone to do the household work for you
@@jaj4706 au pair is an international program, which is like the other person said, it is a “ cultural exchange “ program. The au pair her/himself comes to another country, lives in the local host family and helps with their kids, meanwhile she/he gets the opportunity to experience life in a different country. On the other hand, host kids could experience and learn the culture,experience even another language from their au pair. It should be an equal opportunity and experience for both sides. Unfortunately, this program in the United States is almost like a modern slave job. Total different than in Europe. The Non live in ones is simply as nanny, which is more expensive hourly than paying for the au pair.
There is no insulation around those doors, you live in Australia, I can only imagine the spiders that will be in there 😬 pretty space tho
THIS!!! This was EXACTLY the comment I was looking for! Poorly staged and as another commenter said, it's a "nice looking" stable smh🙄😒.
It's a closet storage space on the way to a bathroom... NOT a bedroom... Unless we're missing something. We never saw the other side of the room. I bet there's junk or boxes overthere. No window!
There are no windows !!! 😂 but the Cookies and room spray will make up for it 😂
And that bed filled the entire space directly in front of the door! No room to get in/out. No room for nightstand. I don't think this is for a real person at all.
To those saying aww how special. Byron gets hot and humid. It’s a tropical climate. This room is a concrete box with no window or aircon/reverse cycle heating. Louvres that high won’t make much difference and the mosquitoes will be insufferable in the wet season. Summer 29deg down to 11deg in winter. Have to wonder why locals weren’t hired (they know better) and they had to “fly in” a young naive nanny. If you don’t live in Australia you have no business defending this post. Putting in a mirror and hand soap from Kmart will not hide the fact that this will be a hot box in summer and an ice box in winter. I doubt it’s even up to code. Saying “my sister got one” (an au pair) goes against how Australians treat others. We do not speak about human beings like they are a convenience that we just picked up at the supermarket.
Exactly this. Everyone in Australia is equal regardless of position and treated as such. I too was disgusted in the ‘my sister got one’ comment. Made it sound like she was purchasing something to own and use, if you know what I mean. Has her living in a cement box.
indigenous ppls too ? Treated equally ?
@@natashab3412 I don’t know what you’re implying with regards to this post, but to use our First Nations people to support your defence of this person is gross.
That was my first thought as well. What a terrible and snooty thing to say about another human being. She “got” one??? Ugh
@@soullessnight6539 Right? This house looks like it has a few proper bedrooms with windows, sunlight and aircon/heating. Basic human comforts in a house that obviously is able to fulfil them, yet chooses to put the vulnerable young woman who will be taking care of her children in a tiny concrete cubby. Further to that, according to theAAPFA- Australian Au Pair Families Association’s
Code of Conduct: Standards of the Host Family’s home:
“All of the Host Family’s home has to be of an appropriate standard, both for the Au Pair and the children in care.
-The Au Pair room should be of reasonable size,
being adequately furnished with a bed and a wardrobe being the minimum, has both a functional *window* and functional door.
Depending on location, adequate heating and/or cooling needs to be provided”
Guest Suite, more like guest cave😮 beautiful door but how about the top with glass for sunlight oh my goodness CAVE😢.
It meets the code for a bedroom I. Australia. They have different bedroom standards than America
to rent this bedroom in Australia (especially Byron Bay) you'd at least be paying $350 a week for this space, it's crazy haha
They should not be "cheaper nannies". They deserve a normal salary, like all normal employees.
This Romanian Au pair I know has a microwave and fridge , in the attic converted huge ensuite room . She earns $400 per week. She doesn’t have to cook or clean. The lady of the house cooks at weekends and freezes the dinners for the week . And they have a cleaner . They both are doctors and work . The children are at school . So she can do what she likes when the kids are at school . Another parent picks up the kids from school . The aupair has to make sure she’s home when the kids arrive from school . She heats the children’s food from the freezer and serves them their dinner . And clears the table. And fills the dishwasher . And that’s it ! She can eat what she likes from the fridge and gets a home made meal from the freezer if she likes.
She doesn’t work weekends.
This is also rich family benefits.
That sounds awesome but also sounds unlikely. If this was my au pair I think she’d be doing the kids laundry and putting it away and keeping the toys picked up. I also think I’d expect that she could prep the kids a fresh hot meal or snack after school. That would be it though. In comparison I know a doctor paying half that for someone who does laundry 2 times a week totaling around 8 hours and while the laundry is running the dishwasher gets loaded /unloaded, and she sweeps mops and I want to say might start dinner don’t quote that dinner part. There’s an expectation that a minimum of x loads are done each shift and that she’s cleaning while waiting on the laundry not just snacking or napping. It seems more than reasonable.
Wow! I'd like that job!
A mini fridge would be nice .. and a tv
But that’s not how the prison system works.
Right!
Genuine question, is air conditioning a thing in Australia? I know some countries like Germany do not generally have it. Either way, I have to imagine living in a hot concrete box is undignified.
She’ll probably have a laptop and/or tablet so all she needs is a wifi password to watch anything she wants.
Agree about the mini fridge though.
A NIGHTSTAND! With a reading light, outlet for phone charging. This is an overnight guest space but not a live-in employee space.
I was an au pair in France years ago. Everyone was kind and, as the mother had worked in England as an au pair, she was up on what was required etc. and made sure my health care was organised.
I lived in Paris and Lake Geneva with them. It was a positive experience but sometimes quite lonely.
really brightened my day to hear you brag about your new servant. Made me forget about cancer, arthritis, and pinched nerve, and the bills that are due. Clips like this are an inspiration to us common people. I’m sure the soaps and lotions will make her content in the cell you have provided for her. Now if you’ll excuse me, I must scrub my own toilet.
"I have too many bedrooms, I should hire a nanny."
If only I had that problem.
Hire me please 😢
😂was looking at her like: hmm, she had time to go shopping, looks like she's in pretty good shape, but what do I know!? Lol
"I have too many bedrooms and I had a bad day last week."
@@gbrisc19 You know it takes time to be in a good shape like that
Are there no windows in the au pairs dungeon?
There are 2 windows above the doors
😂😂😂
😂😂
😂😂😂
Those doors don't look like they'd keep out the creepy bugs that want to kill you in Australia!
I was an au- pair heard about bad treatments. Always picked up cute kids, thought if parents are bad at least I can love the kids😅. Luckily had nice people and memories of the kids still melts my heart.
I met an au pair whom was living with one of my patients when i was a home health aide....she told me such bad stories of what she and others she knew had gone through. Alot of the "host families" wouldn't really pay them for much,and when they did it wasn't much and then they'd give them a list of things to pick up for the household and wouldn't pay them back. They think that since they live and eat at their home,they don't have to pay them much or at all for all the things they do,and they tend to not give them any proper time off since they live there
Make sure to treat her well. I had a friend who had an au pair and they made sure to respect her time off and stay to her official responsibilities. Remember she’s a young girl away from home, treat her like you’d want a younger sister treated at her first job. She’s here to learn and enjoy her time abroad as much as she’s here to help you and your family. Good luck. Love the set up
Back in 2016, when I was 18 I flew to the UK to be an Aupair. I had to look after 3 kids, all boys of 11, 9 and 7 years old. I was supposed to stay 9 months but I gave up after 3 and half. The mom was never around and even when she was in the house she would just stay in her room. She said I would have to do just a bit of cleaning around but I ended being the sole person cleaning the entire house. I had to cook and iron the clothes.. I could have handle if it was just that but whenever I had time to rest the youngest would kick continuously on my door when the mom was doing night shifts. I had so much stress that I started to have eczema on my arms. I had to leave for my mental health.
So I said that I couldn’t stay the 9 months and that I’ll be going back to my country after the month was over. She said that if I was going to leave I had to leave today ! It was raining outside ! I had never took the subway alone before and before leaving she treated me has if I had stolen something from their place !
The worst experience of my life.
I somehow managed to find my way back home.
What an awful lady, it's good your left... she's not only lazy and unreasonable, she's also very ungrateful!
typical experience actually!
sorry you had to go through that
@@beastshawneereally? That's so awful.
Was she a British national? That kind of behaviour is very unusual from a true Brit. I know it was common with a certain kind of person living here or who has moved here. They view au pairs as servants. They view servants as a lower class of person. Though when I lived in the Middle East, expat Brits often treated their housegirls/houseboys like slaves.
I was an au pair and had such an amazing experience with my family that we are still very much part of each other’s lives 10 years later. To the point, I live now in the same country as them and we go on vacations together and celebrate major life events. I was so lucky to have them!
Raise your own kids. Be a parent or don't have kids
Better to have an au pair and keep the children around the home than put them in daycare.
This looks like a garage by the look of the doors. You have decorated beautifully but honestly it isn't a space a person should live in, especially if there is no window.
So agree and also the bed is way too big. No room to move and making the bed would be a nightmare.
It is a garage
In Australia the requirements for a bedroom are different than America. American requires a window, a door and an exposed closet. Australia requires a door, a certain room size, and light - the light can be from a window or skylight or the next room over or a combination of these like a tiny keyhole window and light from the next room over. I believe the room size is 3 meters wide .. that’s three yardsticks. The best rooms have room for the bed and side table and a wardrobe (armoire). Totally different standards.
@@jaj4706 I doubt that in Australia yall considers a barn door to be up to code
It's like you got a play thing, a life-size doll. I can see how this set up might be a kind gesture for a guest staying a few days, but your employee/guest is not sleeping over for a night-she's living there. Her accommodations need to be similar to yours, perhaps not in space, but in effect.
I was an au pair at 14. I was still going to high school. I took care of the baby, and I cleaned the whole house daily, washed dishes, and did laundry - they used cloth diapers, so you can imagine what I had to do. They wanted to keep me, they were both teachers and they told me they would tutor me. But I was way too young to have such a serious and difficult job permanently. I should finish my studies at a regular school and enjoy my youth. So, I declined. They treated me well, paid me like an adult, but it was a hard job!. I thought the little house in this video is cute but too claustrophobic and lacked windows.
Don’t “get” an au pair (they aren’t an object, treat them as a person) just because your sister has one. She probably needs the childcare, you work from home and don’t want to raise your own kids. That is a garage, not a “special guest suite with a separate entrance” it has no windows, and is basically a jail cell with some decor here and there. Hang stuff up on the walls, rugs, etc! I wouldn’t want to stay there
The room is really cute. As a former au pair I would have loved to have a place separate from the main house.
@@fahlou2019 I know, but it’s basically a garage! It’s got no windows and honestly is a little bland on the walls
@@DaisytheSchnauzerit’s also going to be hell for anyone to use during summer in aus. Byron can get super hot and humid, and that’s a bad combo in a poorly ventilated room without AC
I was just coming here to say that! “I got one” really objectifies a person. It makes her sound self-absorbed and self-centered.
@@suzettehorst4065 I know!
That’s a single car garage
lol good eye. A lot of people make them into granny flats.
Looks like it was a shed
Or shed?
@@texasktea yes and I’m fairly certain even in liberal pretend Sydney bong smoking Byron, that the “shed/guest suite” would not be council permit compliant given the lack of windows, lack of ventilation and bodge job en-suite
Oh, I see. Yeah it looks like it was a garage.
My sister recently “got one”… an aupair is a person, not an object.
We had a lovely Au Pair, she was so sweet and did an amazing job of looking after my sister and I. She looked after us Monday to Friday, and had weekends to herself, usually coming home for dinner or lunch, and to hang out and sleep. She went on to marry and have kids, and comes back to visit from time to time. When it works it is a great situation for the parents, kids, and Au Pair. Good luck!
Omg. what a beautiful stable you made for you help
I laughed so hard at this comment, you have no idea
😂
😂😂😂
And then the shot of her walking back out from the box into the COURTYARD of her *estate* lol jesus
😅😅😅 …. more modern than a stable, it was a garage, imho.
So ye stuck her in the garage
Yip she did. With lovely toiletries. 😁🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦
"Like, my sister got one, and I wanted to keep up with my sister, so I got a human to take care of my kid because I'm too lazy! So, I'll put this grown person in a one room box, with a bathroom, and they can just live there with no life and like yeah!"
That's all I heard.
I personally was AuPair. Don’t overwork her, don’t ask for things in her free time just because “she is in the house anyways”, if you need extra help ask kindly, then give her some extra free time in return. Respect her as a human and not just another employee who happens to live with you. This program can be wonderful, but unfortunately many families f*cked it up! Totally!
Treat her right, she is taking care of your most precious littles.
And maybe will be taking care of the husband too.
@@AlbAy537this comment shows what kind of person you are.
Ew wtf is your problem?@@AlbAy537
@@danialfaro5143because I am telling the truth?? Just google, search, investigate. You will find a lot 😂😂😂
this looks like the perfect place to stay as a guest visiting for a night or two, i'm not sure i'd want to *live* there though
Agree !! The room is the size of my closet 🙄
In Australia the requirements for a bedroom are different than America. American requires a window, a door and an exposed closet. Australia requires a door, a certain room size, and light - the light can be from a window or skylight or the next room over or a combination of these like a tiny keyhole window and light from the next room over. I believe the room size is 3 meters wide .. that’s three yardsticks. The best rooms have room for the bed and side table and a wardrobe (armoire). Totally different standards.
No washer, dryer, kitchen which means even more interaction during private care and time.
I don’t think a lot of people realize that for these girls and boys (there are male au pairs as well), the au pair is an Exchange Program, which they PAY to participate. They aren’t going to another country with the purpose to work and make money. They pay for the experience of living abroad and being immerse in the culture, and the best way of doing that is living with a local family. Yes, they get paid for the hours they work while they are there, but the amount is ridiculously low. I believe the families have the option to pay more, but most of them pay the minimum which is something like $200 a week, if not less.
But it doesnt mean they have to sleep in a garage with barn doors
Is she serious?! I can’t! 😂
I have been a nanny for over 20 years and enjoy it but I strictly never live with a family and go by a year to year contract. Many have been wonderful but some have absolutely tried to use me and Im fast to leave them after my contract is up. Please never think that she should go above and beyond what you are paying her for. Nannies do light cleaning up that involve the children but we are not house keepers unless agreed upon and given adequate pay for the extra service. If given extra tasks then she should always be reimbursed by pay. Good luck to you both
I'm a Nanny of 10 yrs. Love my job, but true, always doing extra. But it's a Service and I am grateful
Love this❤
It’s good to know you keep your boundaries!
@carmencastillo9101 Me, too! When I hire on with people, I tell them plainly that I enjoy housework and can’t stand being in a mess so I will do an excellent job caring for their children but I will also keep the house nice. I also prefer jobs with more children and all my positions have been coming on when the mom was having her last baby so they never needed me longer than 3-4 years. Yes, they get used the luxury, but I appreciate the salary and freedom I have.
The thing is she wants an aupair and not a nanny. And I think she got them confused
OK FIRST OFF - image living here. Get rid of the useless blanket ladder and put in a desk with an area for a laptop and a tv. Also um girl - THE FLOOR IS CONCRETE- do you know how cold that is on your feet? Put in a nice area rug. Also instead of the useless stool how about an actual chair? Sorry but I know you tried to make it “cute” but it is NOT functional for someone to actually live in.
P.s. I agree with everyone saying wash the damn linens before putting them on the bed. Like how gross.
Byron Bay doesn't get cold.
THANK YOU!!!
Oh man and the bed being dorectly opposite to the door in like a hall way instead of around that little corner. Who wants their bed directly facing the door?! Aaaaa scary
Good points.
I hope aupairs are properly protected these days. In the early 90s Imoved in with a family in london aged 17, they had 6 year old triplet boys, Her husband had just left her, she had a full on executive job. She was staying out drinking after work, kids refusing to go to bed saying 'Where's mum'.. it was crazy for a while but I really liked them all and I was quite streetwise so I stuck it out. I had an enormous 5 bedroom, 3 bathroom house to keep clean, gave kids breakfast, walked them to school, got on with cleaning, ironing, some batch cooking, picked kids up from school, entertained them, fed them, clocked off at 6pm.. Monday to Friday. Lots of evening babysitting in the week. Eventually she met someone who moved in fairly quickly. They offered me a little more money to do 3 definite nights of weekly babysitting and all his horrendous shirts and clothes to iron too. (6 peoples ironing!) He clearly wanted an aupair that didn't ever go out and have a life.. asked me to not go out at all in the day!!! Popped home randomly to check on me. Afrer nearly 2 years they said 'we dont think you're happy here, think about it'.. well that was clear they wanted me out so I left and moved to my sister's. They got a nice German aupair after who stayed in amd baked. The thing is when she went away with her new fella skiing for a week, her ex hubby was supposed to stay so I wouldn't be alone.. Well he was a rich alcohol who would pop by after work then bugger off home and leave me with the kids every night. One night I called the police as it sounded like someone was breaking in. I never told her any of this when she came back as I didn't want her to argue with her ex, the kids loved their dad too. I even visited them after I left with birthday presents etc.. I stayed in touch for years and still see their lives via Facebook. . Anyway, after all that, aupairs got a raw deal for many years. So I hope they are more respected now and paid properly!
We had au pairs from Denmark where my mother was from, and they were great. They had a wonderful time and we loved having them as part of our family.
Please understand that you DO NOT HIRE an au pair. You HOST them. They are not staff- they are international guests who come to have and share a cultural experience.
The worst thing you can do is treat them like employees. They are family.
Yes! Any £ they get is classed as pocket money, they’re not employees and shouldn’t be expected to work as one. That’s the uk rules although many families choose not to research them
Ummmmm…. They are literally being paid to live with a family to help them take care of children and housework. That’s called employment.
@@BetterMe981No, not the same. Read up about it. They are not servants or employees, even though they are getting paid. It IS a cultural "exchange" program. The rules are extensive. They cannot be treated as an "employee" either, and expected to do whatever the parents want. It's very different, but it does get abused, sad to say.
@@dede4004good to know
Oh...so you don't pay them?
People that get au pairs....eye roll
Yes they're looking for cheap labor and a slave.
As a prior aupair, I think you’ve gone over and above to create a comfortable environment and it’s just amazing 🤩
You're doing great. Welcoming this girl.
Probably. You're 1 in a million with ❤
"Soooo" (In my valley girl voice) "I got to get my own girl to take care of my own children. The Uni said I need to do this. I need to virtue signal to all my friends that I'm a good person who can rent a human."
Dude. It’s not that bad of a job. I did it weekends and summers for 4 years. The dad would let me drive his M3 when he went away on business, the mom her Mercedes trucks. They let me borrow the Vespa whenever I wanted. I got paid well at $20 an hour. Room and board. Vacations. My own guest sweet. It can actually be a pretty sweet gig.
@@gabrielpetersen8528 that went all the way over your head. Okay then.
@@gabrielpetersen8528au pairs can be worked 10 a day up to 45 hours a week and this year their pay in the states was increased from just under 200 to 225 a week...still like it's a great gig?
Well if this was being funny, where is the funniness? You are only mocking her.
If this woman has a lot of money, and she needs help and there are lots of people wanting to come to the area, to explore it. It's a win-win.
Not everyone van go to be a exchange student. So this is another great way to explore the world.
@@Wenixi go rent yourself, I don't care. Hell, work for free and be a voluntary slave.
You'd have to be blind if you believe people with a lot of money "need help." There's always a line of poor people they can exploit, if this system continues this way. More and more people are being exploited so she can rent a human to take care of HER children.
Sounds like you're an exploiter yourself. We'll just chalk that up as you being a "hit dogs holla" kind of person.
I had an au-pair when I was little. She never left haha. Lived with us for three years, then moved close to us, studied , married and had a child. My parents are like grandparents to her child. I’m now 28, she is part of our family and her family are like relatives to us. Amazing things can happen out of a caring relationship with an au-pair and some will be friends forever! So I really appreciate you trying to make her feel home ❤
Awwwww … I’m confident Elsa will have a memorable experience with this family , the fact this family is showing hospitality right off the bat is genuine of their character. Elsa you’re blessed to be a part of this family . Been a nanny for over 30 yrs and absolutely love it. ❤️
Love from sunny Florida USA ☀️❤️
Why does 'My sister got one' bother people so much? I'm an interpreter... If a potential client called and said someone told them to 'get' an interpreter for their multilingual meeting, I would not be offended. When I needed a divorce lawyer, I 'got one'. If I need an electrician, I 'get' one. I could say 'recruit/ find/ hire' but 'get' doesn't in any way imply slavery. It's what you do when you need or want a service of any kind. Get it?
I think the problem here is that people see childcare as menial work, and are just _waiting_ for the person hiring a live-in child minder to say or do something to imply that their nanny/ au pair is subhuman. Guess what? As a mum, one of my biggest fears is that someone who is taking care of my son will treat him badly because they hate me... He is defenceless. It would be so easy to do. And as a mum, I know that caring for a child is GRUELLING work. So if I ever 'got' an au pair, I'd try to make them comfortable and cultivate a good relationship. They are doing VITAL, HARD, IMPORTANT work.
If you see 'getting' childcare as belittling a person, perhaps it's time you 'get' a therapist.
Great comment
I think it has to do with the fact that Au Pairs are taken advantage of quite a bit. Plus, the room is tiny, lacks insulation, windows, seems like a terrible place to unwind. Pieces are being put together.
@@nuclearwessels2078 I don't know the op. Does she have better facilities to offer? Is there a large room with windows where the au pair could stay, and she's opting to stick her in the worst part of the property? If so, then I understand the concern... but by the way she talks about it, I get the impression that that is where ANY long-term guest at her house would stay... I look at that room and I see complete privacy, a place where the au pair can have some independence and space from the family...
If she’s from a different country, make sure you pay her a fair wage and benefits just like you would a nanny. Having been a nanny for 10 years I met many au pairs who were viscously taken advantage of. One wasn’t allowed to leave the house, but came to a playdate while the parents were out of the country! We were stunned.
That IS why they take aupairs.
Au Pairs are always from another country.
I don’t think you understand what benefits are found when giving underprivileged immigrants partial pay. When you’re given room and board, and your citizenship in your country let’s you buy more with less from a higher paying country you actually can make a better living than most U.S. citizens. In some areas you can buy a house for less than 10k, which takes about 3-6 months to save, which can be saved when rent is extremely cheap or free.
Essentially by requiring the same wages, it then defines international labor as “not feasible” as you then are competing with the U.S. workforce. Yet with a reduced pay, you can see more interest in hiring international employees.
When coming from a 3rd world country, and temporarily living in a 1st world, you are then able to find key information and concepts that normally would have not been fed to your algorithm, or what interests you. So essentially you’re getting access to billions... trillions of dollars of information physically built out....
I’m sorry but shame on you. You don’t know how an economy works... and with your lazy expectations you could easily see more underprivileged American citizens and 3rd world country citizens.
It’s best to be grateful rather than think this is your country unless it really is your country.
@@TheWheatGoddess Interesting view. How do you safe this 10k in 3-6 months when being payed 240-450 a month ?
And to know how economics work (by exploitation of other countries and workers in and from other countries) is not such a praiseworthy thing that you could put “ shame.on you“ on somebody who doesnt according to your oppinion.
@@lovepeace2373i dobt think 250 a month would even cover the roundabout flight from my crappy cheap country to the US or Australia, let alone save something.
Imagine the HORROR or raising your own kids 😂
We all need help with things. No one does everything alone. A good nanny/au pair can enhance the relationship between parent and child. It's not a cop out anymore than using a doctor, driver, tutor, cleaner, dry cleaner, plumber etc is. Sure, some overuse them, but not all. And no, I'm not saying this because I have a nanny (I don't)
@@DreamBeliefidk how to be my own doctor or repair my plumbing , but I know and I can raise my own kids. Unless you’re working, hiring a nanny is ridiculous. I’d be so sad if I had to be with a nanny all day while my mom didn’t even work.
Yeah it’s strange to want other people raising your children…especially not family and these children form attachments to these nanny’s and then when there’s an issue they never see them again. It’s odd I don’t really get it if you can hire a nanny then you don’t need to work seems obvious.
🤣🤣🤣
@DreamBelief, everyone uses a doctor. Even doctors use a doctor.
As a Parent, I did all the drop-off, pick-ups, took them to and from practice. Helped with homework, practiced their sport with them, cooked, cleaned, laundry, team mom, volunteered (not really by choice) to help with sport activities, went to games and competitions. Did most yard work, hubby helped when he was home. I did and still do, all the home repairs or renovations, And worked a 40+ hrs weekly. Yes, it was exhausting and I never had any free time. But if I didn't want to do all that, I shouldn't have had my children (4).
I am not alone. Plenty of women do it without help Everyday.
"My sister got oneeee"... like a bag? Give "it" a go. Red flags
Let’s make it super comfortable for our live-in slave by using plain and white beige everywhere. That would definitely make me seem relatable!
Your name suits you perfectly.
@@infinity4evr perfectly said
As someone who has done this before I'd rather have a beautiful Blank Slate on which I can make my own, rather than someone completely decorated place that I would never feel like is my own space
I think this is very pretty accommodation. And im sure the girl will be a good part of the family. Not a slave.
If I was an au pair I would appreciate my own space and time apart from others
we had an aupair and she was beautiful...I miss her. she was perfect...bless you all
No windows 😢 Seems Coffin like with no fresh air.
there are open louvres about the door
Or real doors...
Why is this on my feed… nothing less relatable than set up our guest suite… for our new AU PAAAIIIRRRRR. 🤯
That’s lovely. Some people mistakes Aupair’s with slaves. But they are just young ladies with dreams.
"Arriving tonight" and the room is just now being prepared. I hope the au pair was able to see the space before deciding to take the job.
I feel so dumb, but what does this mean? I thought it was normal to prep guest rooms day of arrival or like hours beforehand so nothing gets dirty or dusty and everything is fresh
what you even mean??
This is supposed to be your guest suite? So basically you live in a big luxurious house and your au pair ( and your guests before her) will be in a tiny closet with no window... How generous of you...
Don't worry she won't be in there long she's the new slave.
You know darn well her guests don't stay in that converted garage.😅
The start of every Liftetime move 😂😂
Best comment 😂
Exactly!
Ha! Yeah the husband hooks up with the nanny
💯
Lol. The babysitter I think it's called where she starts breast feeding the woman's baby an trys to steal her life
Omg your house is my literally one of my dream houses out of two
Guys it’s not perfect but it’s the thought that counts and she made a beautiful environment for her. I’m sure she’ll make changes for it when needed come on.
The windows above the doors are nice but one or two more in the wall would be better, it would feel less claustrophobic in there, also maybe a mini fridge and some sort of electric kettle.
An electric kettle would be nice for a cup of tea or coffee.
Microwave, tv.?
Nobody gunna talk about how she vacuumed the wall 😂😂
Had au pairs growing up- they were always treated like our big sisters and if it wasn’t a good fit, my parents would work hard to help them connect with a new family. My parents were protective of the free time they had with me and my sisters (bc they worked a lot), so our au pairs got to be off the clock as soon as my parents were home and all weekend long. They had no weekend curfew- just no bringing home strangers from the club!
I never understood why people would have an AuPair over a housekeeper. I was happy to give up housework for more time with my children.
As a caregiver/Au pair can help clean home and children,organize, create a framed mindset fornthe child to learn while following the parents guidance, enrichment, another trusted person in the child's life to successfully create the skills for life, cook and or educate safety in living spaces.
Ideally it's what support the child can use and to supplement the parents village in case there are not enough hands or time.❤
This explains what it is my aunt did it for years raised the kids etc even was with the family through death n divorce. She now gets paid to literally house sit n watch their dog 😂😂
because it turns out cheaper
That because it's the children they don't seem to want to deal with. I would have a weekly cleaner
People that can afford a live in nanny can also afford a housekeeper; and they often have both. I have actually never met anyone with a live in nanny that didn’t also have a housekeeper. The housekeeper often came first before the live in nanny. People that want a live in nanny want one for a reason. I’d rather them pay a professional to take care of the kids than to have them neglected instead or even worse, have one of the parents stay home and resent the kids for having to do so. I used to judge people that had live in Nannie’s until I started thinking about what the alternative looks like. It’s not my children that will have a hard time bonding with me or having a relationship with me at all, it’s theirs, so why should I care…why should anyone. As long as the kids aren’t being abused, silently judge and keep it moving
Please don’t overwork her and give her enough free time!!! And also good luck!😊
She will ...rich people are evil and abusive
Looks like she is giving her a good start tho so seems like she is in good hands @@ninam.1560
I grew up with 3 au pairs and loved it
Not me following you because your house is so beautiful 😂💛
That’s a shed attached to the house and crammed next to a wall! 🤣
Lol! You are right! It even has the barn door so the lawn mower fits!!! no windows!
And the bathroom was probably a pantry or something like it 😅
I thought it was just me - it doesn't even have windows from what I can see! Even hostels have windows 😭 Poor Elsa - this is an aesthetically pleasing dungeon lol.
Um nope
@@beastshawnee There's a big transom window above the door. It looks like it can be opened. But it's not low enough to look out of.
Omg, there is no window. Once you close the door, it becomes claustrophobic.
Or cozy.
It’s a car garage!
There is a window above the door. It let's light in although you can't see out.
I actually wouldn't mind that, total privacy
No tv or radio?
i would never want anyone to take care of my children except for me, thats why I had children
I was brought out from England to work in NJ looking after twins as a nanny. I was not an au pair. However after 2.5 years my relationship with their mother had disintegrated. She was quietly manipulative and very insulting. She would walk into my bathroom when I was in the shower which was the last straw for me. I decided to leave and had an awful row with her sister, when I was told “You can’t leave, we own you” that’s when I walked out the door. My photo albums were destroyed which I truly regret but I did manage to get back most of my belongings. The father of the babies hadn’t a clue and was the nicest man. I wished I could have explained everything to him.
When you have too much money to take care of your own children
Or not enough time. It takes a village you know!
@@gabrielpetersen8528 a nanny I understand but an au pair that has to live in your home ft seems silly but it also way cheaper.
@@jamymclellan8709 than I guess I was more of a nanny. Although I did live in the home on weekends and during the kids and my summer breaks! But still. It’s sounding like I was more of a part time live in nanny.
@gabrielpetersen8528 yeah, my first was a live in situation.
Who wouldn’t love it. It’s beautiful.
I used to be an aupair in Europe for 3 different countries (Denmark,Netherlands and Norway) and that experienced I used it to come here in Canada 🇨🇦 I am now Canadian Citizen and I am very grateful with my humble beginnings
“I’m a narcissist who wants cheap labor.”
who says an au pair is cheap lol
They are cheap. Also they themselves make fraction of what a local nanny would charge. Most of the costs goes to the organization/ company. The company says ithat the job isn’t about money but experience. Not saying there are not good families but I had to save couple of girls from that experience
They are extremely cheap compared to a nanny (who does the same job)@@sacha3296
Exactly these people at best are lazy
This is not necessarily true. It all depends on the family. Sure there are some who do but it can be a huge help to have that extra set of hands and a lot of times they become like another member of the family. I spent three years working as one. And it wasn't for a rich family either. But being able to live rent free in New Jersey is huge.
You also have to understand that the reason a lot of them don't make a lot of money is because a place to live is included, meals are included you don't have to worry about water electric any of those bills. Mine even added me to their car insurance and I didn't have to pay any of that even for my own personal vehicle.
If I have been living on my own and having to pay for and buy all of those things, I would have had way less than $100 a week I was making. I basically had $400 a month that I could do whatever I wanted with and was actually able to save up a decent ammount.
There are no windows and Australia gets very hot - especially in the summer. Have you thought of a solution to that? Natural light and air - when the doors are closed.
Treat her like family. Pay her well. She’s taking care of your treasures. Make sure her day off is completely her own time. Go on vacation. Show her around and make sure you have clear cut expectations. Yes, I speak from experience. If you treat her like gold she won’t ever leave you in a lurch. She will want to stay a long time!
"I just had a rough day last week" Who doesnt!!
No windows, so it’s very dark inside!
There's windows over the big wooden doors 😊
They can replace wooden doors with glass ones!
Problem solved
It's so gorgeous. I'd love it!❤️
She can get a lamp. They even make ones that mimic sunlight to the brain but this room does have windows over the door.
@@jisoopark1150what about the bathroom?.. how far is it from her room?
this feels. weird. everything about this feels weird. why is she referring to them like they're a different species.
Harry is gonna be in that stable quite alot hehehe :)
That room is like a shoe box thoe
good luck to Elsa.
i remember that vid of groups of live-in nannies in China meeting up to just occupy the streets and not be at their residence/place of work. some were dancing, others were relaxing, but a good chunk were straight up sleeping in boxes to get some rest on their one day off :(
shoutout to all the live-in service workers. i’m sure it’s hard to establish and or keep boundaries when you live w an employer. Personal assistants too. y’all be safe.
Else isn't moving to China.
@@zariballard didn’t say she was. just wishing her luck as a live-in nanny.
I'm sure everyone is thinking what i am thinking
We are
Run.Ella.Run.
Yeah turn right around go back home😢🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦
She's very blessed to have y'all & vice versa. I hope she never leaves!!!
I couldn't respect a woman who couldn't raise my children and blame myself for making a bad choice. Its the tough times and challenges that bond you to your children and make you aware of where they need you in their lives.
Id like to see the town planning approval and building permits for that room.
Curious, what's wrong with it?
How is it your business?
@@evaszonyi4384 Maybe I dont like people being put in rooms without natural light. Maybe because I work in the construction industry. Maybe because I dont care what you think Karen.
Feel like you have to be from the NE atleast!
@interestedobserver587 the mere fact that there are no windows for ventilation...no seating area as in a small lounge..and no kitchen...