My father did something very similar... I asked him "why"! He told me, heroes are the ones that lost their lives defending their country and never returned home to their loved ones. His medal only reminded him of those he was unable to bring home, he then said what honor is there in that? On that day, I realized he held onto a form of pain I had and may never experience in my lifetime. By the grace of God, I hope I don't.
The reason he threw away his medal was the fact that the battle at Heligoland Bight was one of the most ill conceived raids and a disaster. the RAF losing 12 out of the 24 bombers and 57 men killed ,it was conducted under the mistaken belief that the bombers would always get through, and initially the Bomber Command bosses blamed the aircrew for not flying in tight formation, it was only later that it was admitted that in daylight without fighter protection such raids were suicidal, so the medal rather than being an object of pride would have been a constant reminder of the stupidity of the RAF high command and the unnecessary deaths of so many of his squadron comrades.(IMHO)
A B-17 radio operator told be that these pilots would fly so close together that the props would cut through the skin of the 17 below it. Years after the American Civil War veterans on both sides would gather at North South reunions. My great grandfather, a Confederate private never talked about the war, at least to his grandchildren, but I’m sure these veterans spoke to each other about the terrors.
Agree, and I think Minnie...today...is one of the most beautiful women anywhere. I’m struck by her learning her father had thrown his medal in the Thames. It seems many heroes don’t think of themselves as heroes. Perhaps that is why they are heroes. Ordinary people doing extraordinary things.
@@rcdubya Wonder if she could get a replacement. One of the US Navy pilots who attacked the Japanese carriers at Midway - and lived - wrote a book titled Never Call Me A Hero.
What a lad, my dad was a fighter pilot only in the Army Air corps. He flew out of Iwo Jima to do bomber escort over Japan , he named his Mustang after my Mom. When he died we found his flight log which he rarely spoke about. All the entries of every mission whether perimeter gaurd, solo mission and the escorts. I am friend with a few combat vets now, they rarely talk about their experiences.
With all respect to them but I don't think living with a married man is ''inspirational''... It's dishonest and heartbreaking to say the least. (not being harsh, saying as it is neutrally)
The air battle of Heligoland bight was a slaughter, 22 bombers went out, 12 were shot down, 3 damaged. 57 aircrew were killed. I can fully understand Minnie’s father not wanting to remember being there. A suspect survivor’s guilt.
Always had a fascination over Minnie. She is a great actress and has a wonderful personality! I really hope she gets the answers to her questions about her father! My last marriage failed because my wife was abandoned by her mother at an early age and we tried our best to find her but was unsuccessful. This hole in her life could not be filled by me and eventually caused our end of marriage. The good news is that several years after our divorce she was able to locate her mother and she is now happy and she remarried. I believe this one will last!
M D continues to be a consummately beautiful person, from within, and without. As a child of a WW2 combat veteran, I congratulate her finding answers about her dad. The world owes a debt to that generation, that, can not be repaid. Publicizing their bravery and sacrifice is wonderful though.
Such a delightful young woman. I’m grateful that she has chosen to share her story..and the story of her dad..so many touchpoints between Minnie’s family story and mine.
Like Minnie, I'm a Brat. My father was in the RCAF for 30 years. When he passed I was unable to locate his medals or his father's medal from WW2. After seeing this I need to try to get replacement ones.
What her father did with that medal doesn't surprise me. Lots of men from that time on all sides of that war would do that, even from the battles of today. Most don't talk about their war time experiences. They either get rid of their awards or stash them away somewhere never to be seen again. Main reason they don't talk about it or show off their awards. Is survivors' guilt. Why am I being awarded and I'm still here, when so many of my buddies never made it home and didn't get the awards. Took me a long time to accept that. Part of me still can't.
My dad would talk about his WWII experiences to me and never shunned away, but that was in the late 60's and after some time had passed. Brother was in literal hell in Vietnam and cam home and threw away his medals and uniform. He had given me a medal that I kept with pride, I was only about 8. Years and years later he told my mom he wished now he hadn't thrown away his uniform......he did not know mom had saw him do it and got his uniform and hid it, and she gave it back to him and I gave back the medal he gave me......he still hates that war and struggles. Time I would think heals some things.....war effects everyone in different ways from what I have seen. God Bless all of them.
@@davidc4233 Oh, so glad she did that! And you saved your medal! My friends husband was in Nam. Lost all his buddies. He never talked about it. She said he always treated her nice. She married him after he was early retired from law enforcement, due to injury. I never met him since they were many states away. Later, I finally made it out, but he had died (suddenly, at 67). She had his Nam Helmut on the table to give to her grandson. Man those things were heavy! It's a trip watching war movies. I think, wow, I am watching, but in safety, and I don't hear how loud it really gets, and the smells, and the cold, or the heat, and the bugs, the fear, and everything. I threw some precious things away when in a fit of emotional torture over a terrible personal loss. Boy, I've sure kicked myself since. It can be tough being human.
I read about ex service people, in the comments, not talking about their experiences. This is very common. With a father an Australian Rat of Tobruk, I experienced the same from him. Getting any information was like pulling teeth. A lot of that is that they are trying to forget. I spoke over the phone to one of dad's mates, who was completely different. He told me everything. I asked him why, he told me he nearly went mad, and a psychiatrist told him to talk about it at every opportunity. So open up you poor blighters, if you can. It may help to heal you a bit.
I was quite young when my Grandfather died and I so wish he was here now to discuss this, He refused to open up about his RAF service in Egypt and Burma with his children - I wish someone told him to write it down so we can read it after he's gone - would have helped him and us in hindsight
The closest my great-uncle Jim ever came to talking about the war (WW I) was telling us about some of the workplace accidents he witnessed at the mine he worked at before enlisting, and telling us he found military life safer. This is from a man who survived poison gas at the Somme. He lived a long life in spite of what he went through, which is how I was able to meet him.
@@williammcleod192 that doesn't matter, nobody has the exact same experience to be able to relate anyone perfectly. Empathy and listening skills will go a long way, also to avoid second generational trauma. Which is often exasperated by deafening silence and 'holes' in the person you love and not understanding where certain reactions come from. No they'll likely never completely understand but they'll understand you as a person better.
Comparatively I've had only a small trauma but it is true indeed. There is something magical about talking which is strange but also logical somewhere. At first the memory is sharp as glass and the emotions too. But by speaking out the memories in order in a very different place than where the memories formed and in a safe space with good listeners (whether psychologist or loved ones) the sharpest edges dull. It's just how the brain works that every time a memory has to be reopened and played again it will be remembered a tiny bit different. The added bonus is that it avoids second generational trauma because of, eg, a totally emotionally closed off father that is a big silent question mark and because of that you'll never really know him.
My grandfather threw all of his WW2 and Korean War medals in a lake. He was angry at how he was being treated by the veterans hospital when he was near the end of his life.
@@ShaneT.0331 Why? Well, it's your business. I still think even though one might be angry, it's a way to pass on part of your history of your life to your family. I figure one can write a letter. Write your story why you don't like the medals anymore, but the represent what you went through. People learn so much through others stories. I hope you pass yours on. Through writing, recording, whichever.
My dad served in WWII in Europe and all he would tell me was that the countryside was beautiful but that he wished he had been there under different circumstances where he might have been able to appreciate it. He wouldn't talk about his war experiences at all.
My speculation: 1) he may not have thrown the medal away. It's possible the first (married) family has it 2) he didn't talk to her mother about his life bc she was the side chick, and he wanted to keep her away from his original family & that life. When you have a family + a second family, you keep them very far apart.
Except ironically my great-grandfather from Sweden that cheated on my Swedish great-grandgrandmother and had a son named after him with a woman that is buried next to my greatgrandmother in the Missouri cemetery that they are buried in. He abandoned his children and my grandmother's oldest sister finished raising them.
my grandfather never once talked about the war, despite the fact he was at dunkirk, my grandmother told me "sometimes people see things that no living soul should see", after his death i inherited his old journal from his war days, and he talks about when he came across an open mass grave of childrens bodies half rotten, and his journal says "it is a sight of the like that even the devil himself would wretch at in disgust"
I wouldn't be the least bit surprised that he threw the medal away. My Grandfather did the same thing when he came home from the war. Took all the medals he received and threw them in the canal that ran through our town. A few years ago, we were actually able to get them all replaced, and now they hang in a shadowbox at my Mom's house.
My late brother a Marine , of the 2nd division who fortunately just missed Korea by months . Always said the the more someone talks about combat the more likely he never experienced it. He told me my Uncle who never talked about the war , when he past away they found some of his personal stuff . My brother was shocked that he had 5-6 campaign ribbons. No one was ever treated for PTSD but a lot of those vets self medicated with alcohol War destroys even its survivors.
Both my grandfathers fought in WWII. One in Luftwaffe, one in Heer - but both did not or little spoke about war. I think the people of this era all had their demons that haunted them.
The greatest generation those old WW 2 vets thanks for your father's Military service and your families many sacrifice's. Had Uncle in Navy WW 2 and my grandpa's baby brother in WW2 . He was engineer building bridges from North Africa all way into Berlin Germany . He got badly injuries was told he was in and out hospitals for ten years after war . He had suvivors remorse when he call my dad on his birthday the both had same birthday . He would wonder why he survived and so many his buddies died kind of sad . All Military family and members in Military past and present thanks for your service and your families that also sacrifice along with service member . Was Army vet , as was my dad , and two brothers . Then had Uncle's in Navy , uncle in Marines in Korean war front lines , Uncles in Army Korea as dad was . Then had older brothers in Vietnam era , had exbrother in law in Marines Vietnam vet . Then have many cousin most them in Army some in Airforce and Uncle in Airforce also . One uncle died in car wreck was Airforce also in Vietnam era . Thank one and all whom served honorably discharged God Bless one and all get vaccines thank you all.
I too know nothing of my father and when I asked my mother for any information about my father she knew nothing either, she was with the man for 15 years and had a child together, now there both gone and miss them.
Depending on his age, put a notice in the local newspaper. If he is WW2, probably too late. Best you could hope for is someone who wss about 10 and hsd a much older sibling who knew him. The 10 yo might have met him when visiting house - but if WW2 vintage, you really ate 10/20 years too late. If a young man in 1960, you have a good chance of finding some who were younger, who knew him.
Also, he lost his best friend in that battle, the only one he couldn't save and bring home, so the medal may have been a reminder of that pain. Such a sad thing to live with.
I know Minnie and her mom loved him, but you have to understand about men who cheat on their wives. They are very secretive. He probably didn't want the other family finding out. With the medal and stuff, many soldiers served and died over there. Many do not want reminders of how horrible it was. Unless one served in a war, they do not realize what a nightmare it was.
My father served in the Canadian Army during the War. He never spoke about it, and even my mother knew very little about what he went through. There's a reason for that. He was deeply traumatized and could not bear to think about it. After he passed away I happened to have two conversations with total strangers who were military history buffs. Both of them had read about my father in Dispatches. He had shown exemplary courage more than once, and at one point was the youngest Sgt. Major in the Italian Campaign. I think I understand why her father did not discuss his service. It was probably too painful to do so.
You have to remember she's British , very reserved and like that generation , you don't talk about things especially when he was a married man with family and she did say when she did try and ask he clammed up, which meant she probably never asked him again.
Thats actually pretty common for her generation. Not just from England, but all over. It's a very private thing. Not like today, where people talk and even brag about such things.
@@johnmagill3072 yep and post them on FB, people my age and older tend to not want our business knows all over the globe, (I for one am certainly glad my youthful exploits are private) 🤣
My father fought in WWII, was awarded the Military medal, the usual campaign medals and was mentioned in dispatches, but remained a Rifleman 1st class. Post-war, he almost never spoke about his experiences, but did talk about how the parents of one of his mates talked to him about their son, as he was one of the last to see him alive. He didn't throw his medals away, but did refuse his military pension for decades, as the post-war politically-motivated destruction of his regiment in favour of 'money-saving' disgusted him so much. When he was fully retired, he did claim his pension and was able to live comfortably on it, as it was sensitively handled by real veterans and had not been claimed before.
my father was on the otherside , he didnt talk about the war either .. until his very late years , got a lot of infomation , but its got lots of missing details. He talked about removing the dead from Utah , it clearly messed with his head.
Imagine if the other family didn’t know about Minnie and her mom, only finding out about them by seeing their dad on the telly? Then realizing your half sister is Minnie Driver?!
My friend Bob was ww2 Marine veteran of the Pacific. He threw all of his medals away and would not talk about his experiences . I am a Vietnam vet. and he would not talk to me. I did find out he was at the battle of Pelelui ,which was horrific.
Little comparison, at Heligoland Bight 57 RAF aircrew died of the 110 who went on the mission, Pelelui was bad, but ‘only’ 1,800 killed of the 47,900 present from the USA.
Dear Minnie ... until you go into Combat, you can't understand the mindset of what it does to you. Think about it this way ... he was awarded a Medal that, in his mind, was for doing his job ... and all his Mates that didn't make it through. Very typical view ... and admirable. One of those "you had to be there" deals. About the only way to get a Combat Vet to "open up" is to catch them extremely drunk ... and even then, it doesn't always make sense; the Human mind records in "Snap Shots" not "Video". I hope to see the next installment ... should be interesting. P.S. ... if I'm not mistaken, I think you can contact the Home Office to see about getting a "replacement medal" if you are so inclined ... doubt they'd turn down a request from you. Bon chance from a Yank living in the Cote d'Azur ... you and Henry do look me up if you find yourselves here on Vacay. Cheers.
My granddad's brother served in the SeeBees during WWII. He never spoke about his service to anyone. When he died, a man who served with him told my granddad about his brother having two ships shot out from under him. He never told anyone about this, not even his wife. He just withdrew from everything after he retired.
I heard a colonel say once. "We don't give you medals for what you did. We give you medals so you can live with what you did." Perhaps having something around to remind you of a bad time is not always the best thing.
Weird coincidence - my grandfather was also born in 1921, in the same part of Wales, was also illegitimate, and served in the RAF during WW2. I hope she had better luck tracking down her Welsh ancestors than I’ve had.
@@serpentines6356 I did. There’s no record of him in the village we were told he grew up in. Unfortunately, his surname was Williams - extremely common in Wales.
1999 My job was security for the Doubletree hotel in Manhattan, posted at the main entrance, Ms Driver on the way out has a cigarette in hand and asks the doorman for a light, he doesn't smoke 😳 but I did. As I reach for my Bic lighter the doorman says "hey, I know who you are " She says " oh yeah, what movie was I in?" The doorman paused , in that second I answered as pull up my lighter to light her cigarette; SLEEPERS . She at the same time looks at me pats me on my arm and thanks 😊 me.
All of the responses regard those that wanted to disassociate themselves with medals they were awarded are perfectly valid. We thank them and continue to remember everyone sacrifice. I will add that my grandfather was extremely proud of his medals although later admitted to the working men being a "pawn" of governments, however his medals were always worn with pride.
That's good to hear. Sounds like he understood the sacrifices made, had to be made to stop more evil from taking over the world. Bless him, and your family.
Not an unusual story, my eldest brother swapped my fathers medals for a bag of marbles, all my father said was, "At least they were worth something"........ When I tried to get them back for him, he was very upset and told me that he wanted nothing to do with them or war ever again...........The old boys were different creatures..... Good luck on your quest......
So fascinating. He never felt he deserved to be honored because his father was married when he had him with another woman, and he did the same with Minnie.
My grandad lied about his age and was in the trenches in WWI at 16. He never talked about it. He was a generally very cheerful person. My Nana told me he had been gassed and it meant he couldn't eat certain foods. On my mums side her grandad died at the Sommers and her dad was rescued from Dunkirk.
I’ve known two Vietnam veterans who had significant combat experiences. One has extreme psychological problems and the other doesn’t display any PSD at all but they have in common is they won’t talk about it, nothing about it at all, it’s like they don’t want to go back. Both their wife’s know not to try and talk to them and have to run blocker every once in awhile.
He must have had his reason and you should really respect that , I understand the need to know our pasts but just sometimes the past isn't important , the future is !!
Our past makes us who we are in the present. War time is understandable, but everything else? Nope, she was a side chick, therefore shouldn't know much about him or his other family.
Me either my dad's parents were Gone before I was born & my dad never spoke well of his father and I found out latter the secret they kept but I on my own saw my grandparents pics yet I still no lil about my dad's side & yes I've seen many in my line w Sr's,Jr's or same name's all through 🇬🇧.
It was a different generation - you didn't ask people questions about their past, there was a certain respect and deferential hands off attitude. Nowadays asking questions is de rigeur, but it just wasn't done then.
Minnie !!!!! You may want to look much deeper into the life of Kelly McGregor!!! I've done my genealogy for almost 7 years now and discovered my 5th great grandmother by marriage is a MacGregor and a direct descendant of the first 3 chief clans of the MacGregor clan of Scotland!! They are the arch rivals of the Campbell clan, who also married into my family LOL! If it helps, the famous MacGregor immigrant to the U.S. was ALEXANDER MAGRUDER, Jr. (1610-7/25/1677) IMMIGRANT Father of Samuel Magruder [and son of Lady Margaret Campbell of Perth, Scotland] Born Belliclone, Maderty parish, Perthshire, Scotland; died Prince George's Co., MD Occupation: Unknown; immigrant from Scotland, planter, Tobacco farmer The name Magruder was formerly McGruder, then McCrouder in 1400s, then Gillespie MacGregor, "the Cruiter" 1375-1415, Dysart, Scotland. And as a side note of huge significance, that immigrant's grandfather was the son of Katherine Drummond and her ancestors lead directly to Alexander Drummond who's mother was Margaret Stewart who is the sister of King James (c.1603) who is the son of Margaret Tudor, the sister of King Henry VIII. :) :) Good luck!!!! Looking forward to more, more and more period love stories by you!!! Follow all your movies!!! :) :)
My guess is that he threw the medal in the Thames because all of his friends who went up and never came down were the ones who deserved it. I never met anyone who went into detail about what they did during "the war" (pick one) beyond a few humorous anecdotes with friends.
My dad only said he did his duty, and only story I got out of him was fishing European lake with hand grenades. He threw one in once, it didn't go off, so he got the hell out of that area
Choked up when I heard abt tossing out the medal. Maybe didn't want a reward for survival when others didn't make it. How hard would it be to witness mates being killed in action?
It's a tough thing to understand if you haven't served. Throwing the medal away doesn't surprise me and I've seen/heard of it elsewhere more than once...
If he was looking at the Houses of Parliament at the time, how easy would it be to find all these medals? Disgust felt by military men toward political creatures is an intense and long-established tradition.
My pops wouldn't talk about his experiences but every now and then he would start talking about it just little parts an stop talking it was unimaginable what he went through I would never ask him about it
He threw that medal because that medal brings back terrifying memories and why has he been given a medal when so many other men did more heroic things and were never recognized
Mom is BEAUTIFUL!!!!🎉🎉🎉
My father did something very similar... I asked him "why"! He told me, heroes are the ones that lost their lives defending their country and never returned home to their loved ones. His medal only reminded him of those he was unable to bring home, he then said what honor is there in that? On that day, I realized he held onto a form of pain I had and may never experience in my lifetime. By the grace of God, I hope I don't.
Our veterans in Ukraine do.
The reason he threw away his medal was the fact that the battle at Heligoland Bight was one of the most ill conceived raids and a disaster. the RAF losing 12 out of the 24 bombers and 57 men killed ,it was conducted under the mistaken belief that the bombers would always get through, and initially the Bomber Command bosses blamed the aircrew for not flying in tight formation, it was only later that it was admitted that in daylight without fighter protection such raids were suicidal, so the medal rather than being an object of pride would have been a constant reminder of the stupidity of the RAF high command and the unnecessary deaths of so many of his squadron comrades.(IMHO)
I’ve posted his citation for the medal. Traumatic indeed and possibly some ‘survivors guilt’.
Wow is that what he told you ?
Perhaps he threw the medal into the water to honour his friend on the mission who died after crash landing in the se
A B-17 radio operator told be that these pilots would fly so close together that the props would cut through the skin of the 17 below it.
Years after the American Civil War veterans on both sides would gather at North South reunions. My great grandfather, a Confederate private never talked about the war, at least to his grandchildren, but I’m sure these veterans spoke to each other about the terrors.
Good point!
Minnie & her Mum have a delightful similarity & shorthand when speaking together.
“All acts of bravery were equal to his own” what a beautiful statement
Off topic, but how stunningly beautiful are Minnie and her mother? Just natural beauties.
Agree, and I think Minnie...today...is one of the most beautiful women anywhere. I’m struck by her learning her father had thrown his medal in the Thames. It seems many heroes don’t think of themselves as heroes. Perhaps that is why they are heroes. Ordinary people doing extraordinary things.
Minnie's mother used to be a couture model
@@rcdubya Wonder if she could get a replacement. One of the US Navy pilots who attacked the Japanese carriers at Midway - and lived - wrote a book titled Never Call Me A Hero.
And what a gorgeous voice
Jaws like a bullfrog and a double sloped nose are " stunningly beautiful" ??
Ok. To each their own.
My dad mailed his medals back to govt in protest when he returned from wwii....I wish we had them now. Purple 💜
What a lad, my dad was a fighter pilot only in the Army Air corps. He flew out of Iwo Jima to do bomber escort over Japan , he named his Mustang after my Mom. When he died we found his flight log which he rarely spoke about. All the entries of every mission whether perimeter gaurd, solo mission and the escorts. I am friend with a few combat vets now, they rarely talk about their experiences.
I love Minnie's laugh.....it's infectious and mother is beautiful!!!!
Her mother is just GORGEOUS!
She is the complete package. That laugh. She also doesn’t seem to age.
Minnie’s mum is an inspiration, what beautiful women mother and daughter are 🥰
She's a homewrecker.
@@williamjordan5554 You have no idea what their story is. What a hateful thing to say.
@@deborahmarion9038 Listen to the video.
With all respect to them but I don't think living with a married man is ''inspirational''... It's dishonest and heartbreaking to say the least. (not being harsh, saying as it is neutrally)
The air battle of Heligoland bight was a slaughter, 22 bombers went out, 12 were shot down, 3 damaged. 57 aircrew were killed.
I can fully understand Minnie’s father not wanting to remember being there. A suspect survivor’s guilt.
Very much survivor guilt. Just tragic
it never goes away.
Not necessarily, might be disgust at the higher-ups, trauma, grief, anger and whatnot... It's never just one thing, no need to oversimplify it.
Always had a fascination over Minnie. She is a great actress and has a wonderful personality! I really hope she gets the answers to her questions about her father! My last marriage failed because my wife was abandoned by her mother at an early age and we tried our best to find her but was unsuccessful. This hole in her life could not be filled by me and eventually caused our end of marriage. The good news is that several years after our divorce she was able to locate her mother and she is now happy and she remarried. I believe this one will last!
Her mother is and was beautiful just like her. They look a lot alike.
Minnie is one of my favorite actresses. She has the most enchanting laugh.
I always thought that Minnie Driver is a beautiful woman! She's GORGEOUS! ♥♥
She has a beautiful mother
It is exceedingly rare, indeed, to come across a story having the effect that this one did. A glimpse of a higher plane of reality.
She has a beautiful speaking voice.
Beautiful family, what a great laugh.
She is priceless.
She literally haven’t aged….. this is how you age gracefully
M D continues to be a consummately beautiful person, from within, and without.
As a child of a WW2 combat veteran, I congratulate her finding answers about her dad. The world owes a debt to that generation, that, can not be repaid. Publicizing their bravery and sacrifice is wonderful though.
One of my fav people, Minnie Driver!
Minnie is beautiful, smart, funny, advocates for important issues and has the best laugh. What a woman.
Advocates for important issues? She is an adult human pretender who made a living pretending.
Yes, saw her in Harvard Square while she was filming Good Will Hunting. Got a big smile.
Such a delightful young woman. I’m grateful that she has chosen to share her story..and the story of her dad..so many touchpoints between Minnie’s family story and mine.
Mrs. Driver you are an amazing actress. Your energy is funny, playful and authenticly straightforward. Thank you 🙌🏼.
Like Minnie, I'm a Brat. My father was in the RCAF for 30 years. When he passed I was unable to locate his medals or his father's medal from WW2. After seeing this I need to try to get replacement ones.
What her father did with that medal doesn't surprise me. Lots of men from that time on all sides of that war would do that, even from the battles of today. Most don't talk about their war time experiences. They either get rid of their awards or stash them away somewhere never to be seen again. Main reason they don't talk about it or show off their awards. Is survivors' guilt. Why am I being awarded and I'm still here, when so many of my buddies never made it home and didn't get the awards. Took me a long time to accept that. Part of me still can't.
Same here. I threw all mine out
My dad would talk about his WWII experiences to me and never shunned away, but that was in the late 60's and after some time had passed. Brother was in literal hell in Vietnam and cam home and threw away his medals and uniform. He had given me a medal that I kept with pride, I was only about 8. Years and years later he told my mom he wished now he hadn't thrown away his uniform......he did not know mom had saw him do it and got his uniform and hid it, and she gave it back to him and I gave back the medal he gave me......he still hates that war and struggles. Time I would think heals some things.....war effects everyone in different ways from what I have seen. God Bless all of them.
@@ShaneT.0331 i kept mine ....but ive never worn them so they are tarnished and sit together in a box ..... never ever wanted to polish them either!
@@davidc4233 Oh, so glad she did that! And you saved your medal!
My friends husband was in Nam. Lost all his buddies. He never talked about it. She said he always treated her nice. She married him after he was early retired from law enforcement, due to injury. I never met him since they were many states away.
Later, I finally made it out, but he had died (suddenly, at 67).
She had his Nam Helmut on the table to give to her grandson. Man those things were heavy!
It's a trip watching war movies. I think, wow, I am watching, but in safety, and I don't hear how loud it really gets, and the smells, and the cold, or the heat, and the bugs, the fear, and everything.
I threw some precious things away when in a fit of emotional torture over a terrible personal loss. Boy, I've sure kicked myself since.
It can be tough being human.
I read about ex service people, in the comments, not talking about their experiences. This is very common. With a father an Australian Rat of Tobruk, I experienced the same from him. Getting any information was like pulling teeth. A lot of that is that they are trying to forget. I spoke over the phone to one of dad's mates, who was completely different. He told me everything. I asked him why, he told me he nearly went mad, and a psychiatrist told him to talk about it at every opportunity. So open up you poor blighters, if you can. It may help to heal you a bit.
I was quite young when my Grandfather died and I so wish he was here now to discuss this, He refused to open up about his RAF service in Egypt and Burma with his children - I wish someone told him to write it down so we can read it after he's gone - would have helped him and us in hindsight
Vets that went through it ,will talk to each other.. because unless you experienced it... you can not relate.
The closest my great-uncle Jim ever came to talking about the war (WW I) was telling us about some of the workplace accidents he witnessed at the mine he worked at before enlisting, and telling us he found military life safer. This is from a man who survived poison gas at the Somme.
He lived a long life in spite of what he went through, which is how I was able to meet him.
@@williammcleod192 that doesn't matter, nobody has the exact same experience to be able to relate anyone perfectly. Empathy and listening skills will go a long way, also to avoid second generational trauma. Which is often exasperated by deafening silence and 'holes' in the person you love and not understanding where certain reactions come from. No they'll likely never completely understand but they'll understand you as a person better.
Comparatively I've had only a small trauma but it is true indeed. There is something magical about talking which is strange but also logical somewhere. At first the memory is sharp as glass and the emotions too. But by speaking out the memories in order in a very different place than where the memories formed and in a safe space with good listeners (whether psychologist or loved ones) the sharpest edges dull. It's just how the brain works that every time a memory has to be reopened and played again it will be remembered a tiny bit different. The added bonus is that it avoids second generational trauma because of, eg, a totally emotionally closed off father that is a big silent question mark and because of that you'll never really know him.
My grandfather threw all of his WW2 and Korean War medals in a lake. He was angry at how he was being treated by the veterans hospital when he was near the end of his life.
If you have his Discharge papers, (DD-214) you can send for and receive from the Government all the medals he earned.
That's why soldiers are called "disposable heroes".
I threw all mine out too.
@@ShaneT.0331
"War is a racket."
Gen. Smedley Butler
@@ShaneT.0331 Why? Well, it's your business. I still think even though one might be angry, it's a way to pass on part of your history of your life to your family. I figure one can write a letter. Write your story why you don't like the medals anymore, but the represent what you went through.
People learn so much through others stories. I hope you pass yours on. Through writing, recording, whichever.
My dad served in WWII in Europe and all he would tell me was that the countryside was beautiful but that he wished he had been there under different circumstances where he might have been able to appreciate it. He wouldn't talk about his war experiences at all.
As would my wife's grandmother who served in Burma during ww2
My speculation:
1) he may not have thrown the medal away. It's possible the first (married) family has it
2) he didn't talk to her mother about his life bc she was the side chick, and he wanted to keep her away from his original family & that life. When you have a family + a second family, you keep them very far apart.
Except ironically my great-grandfather from Sweden that cheated on my Swedish great-grandgrandmother and had a son named after him with a woman that is buried next to my greatgrandmother in the Missouri cemetery that they are buried in. He abandoned his children and my grandmother's oldest sister finished raising them.
my grandfather never once talked about the war, despite the fact he was at dunkirk, my grandmother told me "sometimes people see things that no living soul should see", after his death i inherited his old journal from his war days, and he talks about when he came across an open mass grave of childrens bodies half rotten, and his journal says "it is a sight of the like that even the devil himself would wretch at in disgust"
I wouldn't be the least bit surprised that he threw the medal away. My Grandfather did the same thing when he came home from the war. Took all the medals he received and threw them in the canal that ran through our town. A few years ago, we were actually able to get them all replaced, and now they hang in a shadowbox at my Mom's house.
@@KristinaUSA-x5n Now, that's a soap opera! 🤪
My late brother a Marine , of the 2nd division who fortunately just missed Korea by months .
Always said the the more someone talks about combat the more likely he never experienced it.
He told me my Uncle who never talked about the war , when he past away they found some of his personal stuff . My brother was shocked that he had 5-6 campaign ribbons.
No one was ever treated for PTSD but a lot of those vets self medicated with alcohol
War destroys even its survivors.
Both my grandfathers fought in WWII. One in Luftwaffe, one in Heer - but both did not or little spoke about war. I think the people of this era all had their demons that haunted them.
The greatest generation those old WW 2 vets thanks for your father's Military service and your families many sacrifice's. Had Uncle in Navy WW 2 and my grandpa's baby brother in WW2 . He was engineer building bridges from North Africa all way into Berlin Germany . He got badly injuries was told he was in and out hospitals for ten years after war . He had suvivors remorse when he call my dad on his birthday the both had same birthday . He would wonder why he survived and so many his buddies died kind of sad . All Military family and members in Military past and present thanks for your service and your families that also sacrifice along with service member . Was Army vet , as was my dad , and two brothers . Then had Uncle's in Navy , uncle in Marines in Korean war front lines , Uncles in Army Korea as dad was . Then had older brothers in Vietnam era , had exbrother in law in Marines Vietnam vet . Then have many cousin most them in Army some in Airforce and Uncle in Airforce also . One uncle died in car wreck was Airforce also in Vietnam era . Thank one and all whom served honorably discharged God Bless one and all get vaccines thank you all.
I too know nothing of my father and when I asked my mother for any information about my father she knew nothing either, she was with the man for 15 years and had a child together, now there both gone and miss them.
Depending on his age, put a notice in the local newspaper. If he is WW2, probably too late. Best you could hope for is someone who wss about 10 and hsd a much older sibling who knew him. The 10 yo might have met him when visiting house - but if WW2 vintage, you really ate 10/20 years too late. If a young man in 1960, you have a good chance of finding some who were younger, who knew him.
Also, he lost his best friend in that battle, the only one he couldn't save and bring home, so the medal may have been a reminder of that pain. Such a sad thing to live with.
Minnie Driver is delightful 😍🥰
I wonder if there is anyone out there who served with her father and is still living. I want to hear more!!! And, find his other family!
A lot of the old soldiers never spoke about WW II.
I know Minnie and her mom loved him, but you have to understand about men who cheat on their wives. They are very secretive.
He probably didn't want the other family finding out. With the medal and stuff, many soldiers served and died over there. Many do not want reminders of how horrible it was. Unless one served in a war, they do not realize what a nightmare it was.
Her mother’s a bit strange that she knew so little about him ’and not be bothered about it, considering this is the ‘great love of her life’
Her Mother is from London. Rather upper. Wee do not do that. Wee are reserved.
My father served in the Canadian Army during the War. He never spoke about it, and even my mother knew very little about what he went through. There's a reason for that. He was deeply traumatized and could not bear to think about it. After he passed away I happened to have two conversations with total strangers who were military history buffs. Both of them had read about my father in Dispatches. He had shown exemplary courage more than once, and at one point was the youngest Sgt. Major in the Italian Campaign.
I think I understand why her father did not discuss his service. It was probably too painful to do so.
You have to remember she's British , very reserved and like that generation , you don't talk about things especially when he was a married man with family and she did say when she did try and ask he clammed up, which meant she probably never asked him again.
Thats actually pretty common for her generation. Not just from England, but all over. It's a very private thing. Not like today, where people talk and even brag about such things.
@@johnmagill3072 yep and post them on FB, people my age and older tend to not want our business knows all over the globe, (I for one am certainly glad my youthful exploits are private) 🤣
My father fought in WWII, was awarded the Military medal, the usual campaign medals and was mentioned in dispatches, but remained a Rifleman 1st class.
Post-war, he almost never spoke about his experiences, but did talk about how the parents of one of his mates talked to him about their son, as he was one of the last to see him alive.
He didn't throw his medals away, but did refuse his military pension for decades, as the post-war politically-motivated destruction of his regiment in favour of 'money-saving' disgusted him so much.
When he was fully retired, he did claim his pension and was able to live comfortably on it, as it was sensitively handled by real veterans and had not been claimed before.
my father was on the otherside , he didnt talk about the war either .. until his very late years , got a lot of infomation , but its got lots of missing details. He talked about removing the dead from Utah , it clearly messed with his head.
Wow. Interesting!! Just love this show!!! Keep them coming!!!
What a most unusual family situation. Hmm... Not sure what I think about that, except that Driver is a wonderful actress.
he threw the medal away...makes me cry tbh
Love Minnie so Beautiful and Talented Thanks for you work
Imagine if the other family didn’t know about Minnie and her mom, only finding out about them by seeing their dad on the telly? Then realizing your half sister is Minnie Driver?!
OMG WE WOULD BE BFF"S!!!!! She wouldn't have a choice!!! Ha!
Cha-ching!
My friend Bob was ww2 Marine veteran of the Pacific. He threw all of his medals away and would not talk about his experiences . I am a Vietnam vet. and he would not talk to me. I did find out he was at the battle of Pelelui ,which was horrific.
I am Viet Nam veteran also, do YOU talk about your combat experiences??
I don't.
Little comparison, at Heligoland Bight 57 RAF aircrew died of the 110 who went on the mission, Pelelui was bad, but ‘only’ 1,800 killed of the 47,900 present from the USA.
Dear Minnie ... until you go into Combat, you can't understand the mindset of what it does to you. Think about it this way ... he was awarded a Medal that, in his mind, was for doing his job ... and all his Mates that didn't make it through. Very typical view ... and admirable. One of those "you had to be there" deals. About the only way to get a Combat Vet to "open up" is to catch them extremely drunk ... and even then, it doesn't always make sense; the Human mind records in "Snap Shots" not "Video". I hope to see the next installment ... should be interesting. P.S. ... if I'm not mistaken, I think you can contact the Home Office to see about getting a "replacement medal" if you are so inclined ... doubt they'd turn down a request from you. Bon chance from a Yank living in the Cote d'Azur ... you and Henry do look me up if you find yourselves here on Vacay. Cheers.
Many veterans will only open up to other veterans even if they're not from the same era.
Craig...I am sure she has a fan mail address. You can send her your letter there. Good luck! 👍
My granddad's brother served in the SeeBees during WWII. He never spoke about his service to anyone. When he died, a man who served with him told my granddad about his brother having two ships shot out from under him. He never told anyone about this, not even his wife. He just withdrew from everything after he retired.
Lookit! I just found the definition of mansplaining!
@@fdeluccie Gulf War Vet Medic - agreed.
I heard a colonel say once. "We don't give you medals for what you did. We give you medals so you can live with what you did." Perhaps having something around to remind you of a bad time is not always the best thing.
Weird coincidence - my grandfather was also born in 1921, in the same part of Wales, was also illegitimate, and served in the RAF during WW2. I hope she had better luck tracking down her Welsh ancestors than I’ve had.
Do a DNA test.
@@SamStone1964 I was going to say the same thing.
Well, if one has the name, can't they just go through the census like Driver did?
@@serpentines6356 I did. There’s no record of him in the village we were told he grew up in. Unfortunately, his surname was Williams - extremely common in Wales.
@@serpentines6356 Also, finding someone in a census doesn't prove they are related. DNA testing is the only way.
Reading through these posts...it was a different era. I enjoy reading each of your responses to why he threw away the medal(s)...
Super heart warming ...
Its easy to see where minnie gets her beautiful smile!!
Mother and daughter you are both stunning and beautiful ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I love her voice and accent.
1999 My job was security for the Doubletree hotel in Manhattan, posted at the main entrance, Ms Driver on the way out has a cigarette in hand and asks the doorman for a light, he doesn't smoke 😳 but I did. As I reach for my Bic lighter the doorman says "hey, I know who you are " She says " oh yeah, what movie was I in?" The doorman paused , in that second I answered as pull up my lighter to light her cigarette; SLEEPERS . She at the same time looks at me pats me on my arm and thanks 😊 me.
All of the responses regard those that wanted to disassociate themselves with medals they were awarded are perfectly valid. We thank them and continue to remember everyone sacrifice. I will add that my grandfather was extremely proud of his medals although later admitted to the working men being a "pawn" of governments, however his medals were always worn with pride.
That's good to hear. Sounds like he understood the sacrifices made, had to be made to stop more evil from taking over the world.
Bless him, and your family.
She has only gotten better with age.
I still have complicated feelings for Minnie driver. It’s only been decades…
My God Minnie looks gorgeous, does she not age like us mortals?
Her mum was beautiful enough to find her own man, not someone else's.
Not an unusual story, my eldest brother swapped my fathers medals for a bag of marbles, all my father said was, "At least they were worth something"........ When I tried to get them back for him, he was very upset and told me that he wanted nothing to do with them or war ever again...........The old boys were different creatures..... Good luck on your quest......
So fascinating. He never felt he deserved to be honored because his father was married when he had him with another woman, and he did the same with Minnie.
I hope someone fishes it out for her! She is a beautiful person!
It would be great if the Air Force gave her an identical replica of her father's medal!
My grandad lied about his age and was in the trenches in WWI at 16. He never talked about it. He was a generally very cheerful person. My Nana told me he had been gassed and it meant he couldn't eat certain foods.
On my mums side her grandad died at the Sommers and her dad was rescued from Dunkirk.
her character in will and grace is hilarious too this day! "hello motha!"
I’ve known two Vietnam veterans who had significant combat experiences. One has extreme psychological problems and the other doesn’t display any PSD at all but they have in common is they won’t talk about it, nothing about it at all, it’s like they don’t want to go back. Both their wife’s know not to try and talk to them and have to run blocker every once in awhile.
A lot of servicemen with medals threw them away due to not thinking they were not worthy of them.
I'm sure many were disgusted by the fact that they fought for freedom and then watched as half of Europe was handed over to Stalin by their leaders.
What man! After what he see at war the medal means nothing! Only he know what he endure,man with grit,they don’t make that anymore !🙏!
He must have had his reason and you should really respect that , I understand the need to know our pasts but just sometimes the past isn't important , the future is !!
Our past makes us who we are in the present. War time is understandable, but everything else? Nope, she was a side chick, therefore shouldn't know much about him or his other family.
I loved her in the Good Will Hunting. I wished they completed the last scene where Matt Damon meets her in Stanford
Her son looks just like her dad.
This needs to be a movie
Me either my dad's parents were Gone before I was born & my dad never spoke well of his father and I found out latter the secret they kept but I on my own saw my grandparents pics yet I still no lil about my dad's side & yes I've seen many in my line w Sr's,Jr's or same name's all through 🇬🇧.
It was a different generation - you didn't ask people questions about their past, there was a certain respect and deferential hands off attitude. Nowadays asking questions is de rigeur, but it just wasn't done then.
Minnie !!!!! You may want to look much deeper into the life of Kelly McGregor!!! I've done my genealogy for almost 7 years now and discovered my 5th great grandmother by marriage is a MacGregor and a direct descendant of the first 3 chief clans of the MacGregor clan of Scotland!! They are the arch rivals of the Campbell clan, who also married into my family LOL! If it helps, the famous MacGregor immigrant to the U.S. was ALEXANDER MAGRUDER, Jr.
(1610-7/25/1677)
IMMIGRANT
Father of Samuel Magruder
[and son of Lady Margaret Campbell of Perth, Scotland]
Born Belliclone, Maderty parish, Perthshire, Scotland; died Prince George's Co., MD
Occupation: Unknown; immigrant from Scotland, planter, Tobacco farmer
The name Magruder was formerly McGruder, then McCrouder in 1400s, then Gillespie MacGregor, "the Cruiter" 1375-1415, Dysart, Scotland. And as a side note of huge significance, that immigrant's grandfather was the son of Katherine Drummond and her ancestors lead directly to Alexander Drummond who's mother was Margaret Stewart who is the sister of King James (c.1603) who is the son of Margaret Tudor, the sister of King Henry VIII. :) :)
Good luck!!!! Looking forward to more, more and more period love stories by you!!! Follow all your movies!!! :) :)
Minnie has such a beautiful face.
My guess is that he threw the medal in the Thames because all of his friends who went up and never came down were the ones who deserved it. I never met anyone who went into detail about what they did during "the war" (pick one) beyond a few humorous anecdotes with friends.
I am going to agree with you.
that is from my own experience.
Best not to wake the dead.
My dad only said he did his duty, and only story I got out of him was fishing European lake with hand grenades. He threw one in once, it didn't go off, so he got the hell out of that area
I've always liked her even more so now. Hope she finds contentment.
To see another side of her watch Minnie on Craig Ferguson.
Choked up when I heard abt tossing out the medal. Maybe didn't want a reward for survival when others didn't make it. How hard would it be to witness mates being killed in action?
Lovely lady
2:25 She was attractive when she was younger but is beautiful in middle age.
It's a tough thing to understand if you haven't served. Throwing the medal away doesn't surprise me and I've seen/heard of it elsewhere more than once...
Minnie has gotten more pretty as she's aged. She quite beautiful now
..I’m a little obsessed with Minnie Driver, she’s just one of those phenomenal women that exist in this world.
Here in the states, You can apply for your fathers war records and any medals he had been given. Not sure if it's the same in England.
It is the same in the UK.
Wow
Such classy people are Minnie and her Mom.
Classy?She had an affair with a married man.She was a mistress.
Her mum is beautiful too.
Minnie's mother has an air of Joanna Lumley about her 😀
Minnie Driver is such a stunningly beautiful women and age has been graceful to her.
My Grandfather was in the LRDG in north Africa in WW2 and he threw his medals in the Thames how weird.
If he was looking at the Houses of Parliament at the time, how easy would it be to find all these medals?
Disgust felt by military men toward political creatures is an intense and long-established tradition.
Awesome info here & this is an older Docu. she's 51 now not 43 !!
Shocked to learn that Minnie is 2 years younger than me, I always thought she was older than me.
My pops wouldn't talk about his experiences but every now and then he would start talking about it just little parts an stop talking it was unimaginable what he went through I would never ask him about it
He threw that medal because that medal brings back terrifying memories and why has he been given a medal when so many other men did more heroic things and were never recognized
Yes, he threw it away due to survivor's guilt, I would say. I sailed with Merchant Seamen from WWII.