I'm Sorry You Feel That Way - Smart Couple 145
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- čas přidán 5. 09. 2024
- I'm Sorry You Feel That Way - Smart Couple 145
One of the worst things you can say to your partner is "I'm sorry you feel that way." Why? Listen in for what to do instead and what you can say if your partner is saying this to you.
QUESTION:
I feel like I’m doing my part setting boundaries, communicating my needs and asking for what I want. What else can I try?
I’ve done the work to learn how to express and articulate my needs, how I want to be treated, what’s not ok with me, behaviour that’s hurtful (very clearly with specific behaviours) and setting clear boundaries. Some of the behaviours continue even though I’ve clearly told him I won’t tolerate it anymore. When I tell him how this specific behaviour impacts me, I often get a sarcastic “I’m sorry you feel this way” and he just doesn’t listen to me.
"I'm sorry you feel that way" is a complete side-step out of responsibility and accountability. I heard it a few times in a professional context, once when I pulled up a colleague for literally backing me into a corner at a work fuction to listen to his obsessive thoughts about breaking up with a colleague in common. He was inches away from my face, drunk, rambling and I had nowhere to go. I felt threatened, nervous and invaded and his response a few weeks later when I raised how his behaviour affected me was, "I'm sorry you feel that way". My response was, how I feel about the situation is one thing, but that behaviour is completely inappropriate on any level, especially in a professional context. He had to back down very quickly and I got an apology! I straight out hate that sentence.
Agreed. It puts the onus on the receiving/offended/victimized party and demonstrates no ownership of action or remorse or empathy. As though the problem is actually in, or about, the resulting "feeling" instead of it being about the offending act or the person who did it. It's a misdirecting, often times purposefully redirecting, cop-out.
Its even worse from a parent.
Thank you so much for this. I just received a “I’m sorry you feel that way text” i really had no idea how to reply to that.
:(
I don't understand how a person in a relationship cannot nor does not validate their partners feelings & listen to them when they talk, disrespecting is no-way, you always want to grow with one another & learn together, your relationship is the top important priority that you can ever have, because your partner is your priority & you always make him feel it & know it in every way & everyday you possibly can :-) .......personally I can't stand a messy house either ;-)
Love the video but hate the use of "Jesus" as a swear word. Why do you think that's okay? How does His name satisfy your need to swear? Not cool. Disrespectful to Christians. How about using Mohammed! or Obama! or the N word instead to swear? Also not cool. A video about showing respect to another's feelings should be respectful.
Thanks.
Thanks for your feedback :)
I’m sorry you feel that way…. Sorry I had too