Volcano Lairs are a TERRIBLE Idea (feat. xkcd)
Vložit
- čas přidán 25. 12. 2019
- Inside a volcano may seem like the perfect place to stage supervillain schemes, but is it actually one of the worst possible places for your base?
You can order Randall’s fantastic new book HOW TO here: www.penguinrandomhouse.com/bo... - Věda a technologie
He's not a supervillain, he's a consultant for supervillains.
So he's Saul?
@@DeadMarine1980 well, there is a super villane level that can't be topped, the lawyer level. 😏
You’re an Izzet player huh
I approve
Smart. That's where the real money is.
Hmm, this sounds like something someone with a volcano lair would say.
Hmmm indeed. Hey do you think he is up to something idk evil?
I'm just hearing a lot of excuses that no self respecting super villain would accept from their minions.
Correction: This video sounds like someone that lost their volcano lair to the volcano would say.
Terrible joke opportunity missed: "Let's get techtonical"
*Somewhere a skeleton named after a font is laughing.
@@mattb9343 Sans?
Don't *fault* him for missing it
@@briantonkin7737 boooooo! 😂
@@83fleafan the good news with volcanic lairs, they almost always come with boundaries
Kyle telling me all these volcanology "facts" just makes me think he's trying to convince people not to look for his lair near volcanoes.
I mean, err, great show! Good facts! Ahem.
Pfft, we build housing on and around an active Volcano in Hawaii(Mauna Low) who's daughter vents are constantly pumping out Lava with Kiluea and the "June 27th Lava flow" and the more recent Leilani Estates fishers opening up in residental area destroying hundreds of homes just the norm
I'm 6 miles away from Leilani also on Manna Loa's Base with a Earthquake every morning at Sunrise, hearing new eruptiong shifts through the lava tubes under my house, and a risk of my yard smelling. Like clorox after a rain
Keep looking for the smoldered, possibly Hawaiian, remains of said lair.
Kyle why build a lair inside a volcano? The best location is obviously under the ocean the pressure is too much and is also the least explored place on earth. Meaning the laser sharks are just easier to manetain.
'Manetain'
@@ryan52743 thanks.
''Maintain'' ?
@@somerandomguy312 joke on Kyle's hair maintenance. He calls it manetain.
Sea bass
"They are mutated sea bass"
"Really"?
Are they I'll tempered?
"If we were good supervillains, which we're not"
Kyle confirms he is simply a bad supervillain
“Good Supervillan” sounds like ozymandias.
"What do I pay you for?"
"You don't pay us."
"What I let you live for"
Well played Freeza.
I am not your men. I'm flipping you off!
"We aren't gonna be alive much longer if we stay in this volcano."
Kyle, 1:14 - "What is a volcano?"
Me - "A planet pimple."
Kyle, 1:35 - "These planet pimples, as no one calls them"
Me - "Oh."
Same thing... apparently allot more of us call them planet pimples than he thinks...
Hi Odysseus.
Volcanoes might not be a good place for a lair, but they are the best place to deposit a hero with super-regeneration powers.
Drop the hero in the middle of the crater. Their regeneration shouldn't be able to keep up with the burns.
If you can make them sink (maybe because their skeleton us adamantium), the pressure will keep them there forever.
Unless the can make a whole bunch of bubbles, JoJo style.
Or is Kars.
Concrete?
Sadly, not going the happen. Forget density, even if the density of a mafic magma/lava is much higher than your standard steel alloy (and yes, adamantium is canonically a steel alloy with vibranium). We have the liedenfrost effect to contend with. You know how water will skate around a searing hot pan? That is exactly what would happen. Frankly, if it weren't for the fact that the volitiles (in geological terms, low temperature gases in the magma; eg. water, CO2, SO2) potentially making it somewhat acidic, it would be a novel way to cook a steak. A high healing factor hero would eventually end up near a shoreline, naked, healing, and pissed. ... ... Perhaps a pure osmium weight could weigh them down long enough before melting itself.
"Are you dropping me in a volcano? Then I want for my last meal as much Taco Bell as you can get."
Love Hawks - That's some good insight. You are a "SUPER NERD" WAAHaaRRrrr!!!👍
Yeah but what about an inactive volcano? The petrified remains of past civilizations give an ominous aura to the place and it would be practical for a number of reasons; volcanos often leave behind caves that would presumably cut down building costs and hide your (... I mean the villain's) lair, plus volcanos aren't a place with a lot of traffic and a hypothetical super villain (obviously not you Kyle) could devise of ways to make the volcano look active, like say periodically releasing those dangerous gasses you talked about or just pay some less than ethical volcanologists off to say that the volcano is dangegrous to live nearby, finally it is my understanding that volcanic soil is less dense than your average dirt making it easier to dig.
And it provides enough power for all the death rays you can think of.
The "not visited" is not really the case.
A. Vulcanoes provide besides death and destruction also some of the best farming soil, which causes whole civilisations to grow around them.
B. Vulcanoes are permanently studied by geologist, vulcanologists and seismographic researchers.
C. Such a warning has only temporary effect while a villain lair is permanent.
@@martinsmouter9321 right i didnt even think of the geothermal energy potential as for the rest ofyour comment i d say that traffic varries from volcano to volcano obviously some are tourist attractions and the soil volcanos provide is great for farming but there is a number of volcanos that are not so busy,( for example there are a number of ex volcanos in the Agean sea that are visited by next to noone if sme made the locals "relocate" with some sort of warning the island would pretty much be yours) also if a volcano is declared active it could be literally centuries before it's classified as inactive (I could be wrong about that last point I didnt bother looking it up I just remember it from school :) )
@@odisseaschatz7332 your completely right about the active part. I thought you purposed an eruption warning, instead of an active declaration.
For an active declaration you've to fake an eruption, but after that your vulcano is classified as active for the coming centuries.
A problem with your idea with scaring of inhabitants is that everything that scares inhabitants attracts scientists, both because said scientists are supposed to give early warnings for eruptions and because vulcanic activity is the most interesting part about vulcanoes.
@Justin Page if you start playing villain you were already gambling with your life, so a little more risk isn't often considered and it allows for non-tracable power generation on a big scale, hidden ways to get food and something to blame for lab accidents.
@@martinsmouter9321 volcanoes*
But think in the pros:
you get an almost unlimited amount of geothermal energy to power your world ending laser thingie!
and the company bbqs are extraordinaly cheap on the heating department
World ending laser thingy is called a doomsday machines.
So, after watching this I have to chime in with my suggestion for your Evil Lair. If you want a better location, try the Antarctic. It is remote, you wont get many visitors, the cold wont be such a terrible issue since you will need to have a large generator / reactor in order to power your evil plans so it will be providing heat for you. In fact, building this anywhere warm in the world would mean a constant need for venting the heat, so being in a super cold region is actuall cost effective; offset by transporting materials to the South Pole. Submarine access is doable and you don't have to go far for fish. Also, your travel distance to almost all major parts of the world is about the same for any direction. Best of all, the Flat Earth community wont even believe your location exists! Win-Win-Win.
Just watch out if you see some Norwegian guy in a helicopter shooting at a dog
I feel like volcano lairs would be useful as decoy locations. Hero arrives at your brand new state-of-the-art volcano base, convinced that your secret formula must be here, why else would you expend so many resources in so impractical a location? They battle their way past gun turrets and all manner of automated defenses, slowly beginning to suffer heat stroke and exhaustion as they traverse the labyrinthine maze toward the very core of the volcano, convinced that anything hidden here must be of the utmost importance. Then at the very end of the maze is just a sign that says “Congratulations. You did it. The real formula is the friends you made along the way,” and a refrigerator full of cool drinks. (They’ve been a trooper thus far. Credit where credit is due...) Then the hero gets to make their way through the entire maze again with their supplies depleted and their body completely exhausted.
Meanwhile, the complex formula that supplies your evil empire with its power is secure in a few safety-deposit-boxes kept in your actual name in small banks across several states. The hero wants to get it? They have to break into several legitimate banks and rob the safety deposit boxes of a private citizen to gather the pieces and complete the formula. Who’s the villain now? This is just corporate espionage at this point.
Also any minions who helped to construct the decoy volcano base (remotely operating unmanned construction vehicles. I’m not a monster...) are given a full retirement package as well as the option to stay with the organization in an advisory role in the construction of any future bases. If you help me build my elaborate ruse for the sake of satisfaction, I will help you build whatever satisfying future you want for yourself as well. I’m about winning the long game, not taking advantage of people.
Last thought; after a while we would be REALLY good at building temporary volcano bases, and could probably gather some useful data for the field of vulcanology as well. Everybody wins except for that reprehensible, bank robbing scoundrel.
Sooo you are basically an antihero, and not a villain, and your foil views themselves as a hero, while they are the actual villains. Nice!
As far as any of you are concerned, that is absolutely correct.
Well... get a job as a comic writer
stefan sauvageon Thank you. You are very kind.
As a side venture, you have the decoy volcano bases powered through geothermal plants, and you hook those plants into the local power grid of any inhabited area within a reasonable area.
Most "heroes" will try to find some way to destroy the base. That's all good. Let them.
The public backlash from destroying the power plant supplying nearly all electrical power to the inhabitants (as well as siphoning off heat from the magma and thus reducing the threat of eruptions somewhat) will be a nice black eye to compliment their humiliation.
LIES Kyle just doesn't want us finding HIS evil villain base in a volcano by telling us it is impossible....
Kyle: *builds volcano lair*
Lair: *gets destroyed by location*
Kyle: *warns people not to build in volcanoes*
Comments section: *your comment*
Also comments section: *my comment*
I'm disappointed by the lack of _High ground_ in this video.
That is where levitating platforms come in
I find your lack of the high ground disturbing.
See, Sauron had the right setup after all. Not bad for a big floaty eyeball.
Have the volcano in the background, enter it only occasionally for some crafting hobbies, retire for the night in his warm, comfy bed while his happy citizens breathed the nutritionist noxious gases and enjoyed the shade from the harrowing sunshine. 👍🏼
Uhm, wouldn't be a Super-Evil-Genius plan to attract the heroes to a Volcano Lair that in reality is a decoy/trap? Imagine the problems the heroes would face to get out of such dangerous place. Yes, is an expansive plan, but do Super-Villains care for costs? Or the lives of their minions? You tell me, Kylie, muahahahahaha
Hello ARYA
Henchpeople? The reason its henchmen is because women are smart enough not to work in a volcano.
Side note... you hiring in your volcano?
did u see he's burning in there...give him abit of time..
Considering "evil" Kyle can order orbital strikes at will, the void is probably a green screen room in an orbiting space station with artificial gravity.
Long as it come with benefits and life insurance
One reason why men live shorter is because a small percentage of men get killed while doing stupid stunts like Jackass. There are more male idiots, but also more male geniuses. Women are slightly smarter on average, but the IQ is closer together, so there are less less female scientists, but also less female idiots.
It was always the greatest irony in all the Bond bad guys. Genius level engineers and administrators that somehow couldn't figure out how to get paid off of those tremendous gifts
Not to mention the very large increased probability of getting Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. Or silicosis. You get it from breathing in crystallized silica dust, causing inflammation, scarring and even lesions in your throat and lungs. Doesn’t sound like the most pleasant of ways to go. It’s also the longest word in the English dictionary :)
It's not the longest word in the English Dictionary, because the longest word in English is 189 thousand letters long.
@@livedandletdie And that's like some super huge number in mathematics with all the digits spelled out as words right, so not sure that really counts.
- "We have dental."
- Henchman: "When do I start?"
The first thing i thought was if lava flowed down to your entrance and it solidified and trapped you inside and your "secret lair" would turn into a giant microwave.. that would be hell
and no one will know about your whereabouts even after you are baked potato!!!!!!
Oven, unless lava has started emitting microwaves recently.
I had really hoped Randall Munroe was going to make an appearance.
He did. He is actually a stick figure in real life. One that was nice enough to sign my copy of What If. :D
Kyle: "Every good super villain, which we're not"
Me: huh, so you're a bad super villain, meaning you're still a super villain!
hahahaha hes just trying to divert our attention from volcanoes so we dont go looking for his volcano lair.
Not to mention the constant threat of security breaches from all of the geographers and volcanologists that study the volcano's activity constantly (which happens almost everywhere) and of hobbits breaking in and dumping their jewelry in your home.
But you never run out of research subjects and can always blame disappearing people and hobbits on the vulcano.
Researchers will turn around when you have guns.
The hobbits on the other hand, yeah I have no solution for them.
@@JSnyder49428 if you start threatening researchers they will tell their mates and so reveal the location of your secret hideout
Threaten they end up as bathing accidents in my hydrochloric bath tubs.
Elaborate hydrochloric bath tubs when you have a pit of lava at your disposal?
That's exactly the kind of prohibitively impractical design choices our volcano lair needs!
I like it.
props to breath of the wild for having link catch fire anytime he gets close without protection.
Thanks for the itemized list of hazards to include in my next D&D Module, Kyle.
Ok, sure, Kyle. But where else are you going to get a large enough surface to make into your face, have an ominous smoke effect coming from it AND have a convenient way to 'stop' any heroes? That kind of real estate isn't everywhere, you know!
Plus the faceholes would make nice vents to slow or prevent pressurization within the column that could lead to an eruption.
Yeah and how does he get the power for his death rays if it is not geothermal and static discharge in his personal vulcano.
See, it's that giant face sculpture thing that's usually a dead giveaway for an evil villain's lair. Remember, a true villain's enemy is hubris and ego. You don't want to advertise your base. You want to hide it. An unassuming office building or manufacturing plant is what you really want. You don't think Elon Musk's Tesla plants don't have armed guards at all times of the day? And what is he using all that steel and other materials for? Are you sure it's going into his cars? What about SpaceX? Could be another cover story.
Or what about free energy! Just plug the top of a volcano and draw the smoke and heat from the volcano to power your base and filter the smoke out.
@@gandalftheantlion Because that's not how that works. You'd want to look for geysers and pools of superheated water, and use that to power your base.
Also, Kyle told us that lava doesn't always go up and out of the top, but eats holes in the sides and bottoms of volcanoes.
Kyle, while I agree you wouldn't want to build your base inside an active volcano, as an evil villain, you would still want to build near them for two reasons. First off, I can't stress the importance of FREE, CLEAN ENERGY. Iceland has about thirty active volcanoes that powers their geothermal industry. And they're not tapping into the volcanoes directly, but using the superheated water in these volcanically active areas instead. Many volcanic island paradises have similar resources underwater near volcanic vents. And while most of the world would be searching for you by looking for evidence of nuclear power plants, fields of solar or wind, or even a few dirty coal plants, your energy production is going to be tucked safely underwater. Second, volcanic areas are known for having super fertile soil. Being able to grow your own food makes you less reliant on the outside world, cuts off one more avenue for those sneaky spy boys from finding a way into your base, and ensures your rivals will have a very hard time poisoning you through your food supply. This is one thing Syndrome got right when he built his island lair.
Ideally, you want to find some location similar to the Hawaiian Island Chain. This gives you a geological historical record to use when planning where to put your base. This is important, so you'll know where the lava is likely to flow during an eruption and where the next volcano is likely to spring up when the plate shifts. Also, you probably want to build that base underwater for the thermal properties of water (in case lava does come your way), using buoyancy to minimize risks from seismic activity, hiding your base from those nosey CIA spy sats, and the sheer cool factor of having an underwater base guarded by mutated sharks with lasers. And, it's not like every volcanic island paradise is a Krakatoa just waiting to happen.
Fair point, if you're going to power a death ray, geothermal is cheaper and easier to come by than enriched uranium.
Yeah, i'm not gonna read all that.
Ahem: _super nerd_
@@mrjaz666 wow that is smart i literally never thought about that up to this point
I smell 4th time Super Nerd already 😤
I appreciate how you wrote "not to scale" just in case we thought that humans were usually a similar size to volcanoes.
*Sigh* - removes item from his list of 2020 goals
now i think he wants to make us supervilans.
He is the best villan and is training us with these videos.
thats why i love these videos xD
If everyone is a supervillain, then nobody is a supervillain.
if everone os a supervillain then no one will be the pesky hero
@bryan diaz varela My powers don't, so I can drive... MUAHhahahahahaa.. uh.. crap. The freeway's clogged and you probably can walk faster than traffic is moving.
" Every good supervillian - which we're *NOT* "
Heh. Thanks to the laws of English, you now are technically a horrible supervillain. :)
"Stratovolcano" is an awesome name for superstrat guitar.
Evil is just a perspective
Everyone’s the hero in their own story
Not me. I'm the antagonist in everyone's story.
No you're not, no one is the antagonist in my story. After all, we're all friends in mine, I say friends, what I mean is everyone is my subservient slave and everyone stands still on the conveyor belts that keep my factories rolling, using human bodies as a fuel source.
It sounds ludicrous, but people actually think this way. Why most people need to learn ethics.
What is "evil"
To me as far as I understood it it D&D terms it just means someone interested only in themselves and their own interests
Thing is that is how most non communal animals are and that is how a human child between 2-4 or even older is if not thought the right way ending up evil snowflakes
Farmer Frank would you say that evil is a desire to fulfill ones own dreams? No matter how “pure” they may seem? Cause I thought that would fall under chaotic good..
Dr stone the anime had a good part with volcanoes. They said the air around a volcano is full of sulphur being deadly
Do you know that most of the residents of Pompeii were dead long before the lava hit the city? It's believed that most died due to carbon monoxide poisoning.
I didn't know carbon monoxide was heavier than air
Oh sure! Now you tell me! Would have been useful info before I contracted you to build a base in one... Guess next you are going to tell me the sharks with friggin lasers I ordered are actually useless because lasers can't travel through water....
**Inaudible whispers**
WHAT?!?
I've been calling them planet pimples for years! Talk about being ahead of my time.
Imagine that: Super Villain Kyle is trying to get us to NOT look for him in volcanos. Classic reverse psychology.
Kyle has a secret company that provides super villains with information on how to do things... Like, stealing cars on space, adding lasers to sharks, where to hide lairs...
And then he gives the villain his findings and also publish here, to make double money...
Love from Brazil!
It would be much better to carve your base into a mountain like the Cheyenne Mountain complex and then vinyl wrap or spray painted to look like a Volcano.
So long as you have a broom closet named SG1
Yes, I agree with this so hard lol!
Maybe use an inactive volcano, and find a way to convince everyone that it's active again
@@cealvan8941 The world's largest baking soda vinegar volcano ever made.
@@cealvan8941 I mean staging an explosion isn't hard when you're a supervillain who probably utilizes non-staged explosions just as often. And synthetic lava isn't that hard to create as long as you have the money and tools. It looks real until someone stops running long enough to realize it's not completely vaporizing everything organic near them. Synthetic lava can be made and has been made in labs in smaller quantities and if I remember the details correctly (this following bit could be slightly wrong, I'm going off memory from some research papers I read a few years ago) it's significantly cooler than real lava because it's not actually made of molten rock. Instead it's basically just an oil based liquid that has a super high flash point so it can flow and acquire the appearance of being molten while not being nearly as hot. It'd probably be much easier to clean up after too. Hey the villain could even stage a cleanup effort to gain publicity and reduce suspicion of their evil. Blow up the top of the volcano often enough to scare nosy people away but clean up the mess often enough to look good to the public eye. It's nearly fool proof. Then again I bet making that much synthetic lava would be incredibly expensive. The largest quantity I've seen of it was something like 150 gallons.
"you shouldn't drill into a lava place." Dwarf fortress lied to me!!
Volcanic lightning might be the coolest thing ever photographed, which would definitely give your evil lair that epic flair you need. Also, given how hard it would be to construct this lair, wouldn't that be an amazing to brag about in The League of Villians? I think Kyle is just telling all the other super villians why it's a bad idea, so that he can construct one for himself and be the only person with one.
Because Science is vital to an emerging villain such as myself!
I think you're mistaking Because Science with any right wing conservative political party.
Stfu
theemissary1313, you don't need a right wing conservative political party to be evil, after all the Democrats have managed fine with being evil since their founding. I mean, they didn't want the abolition of slavery, they didn't want women to vote, the list goes on and on, Oh and they love to ruin cities and kill people.
Oh and let's not forget that all dictators throughout time have been left wing. Unless you consider Augusto Pinochet as a dictator, because then there has only been 1 right wing dictator in the world.
But if you want to become a Villain, actually understanding economics, planning, job security, and everything else that is necessary to have a successful corporation, being right wing helps.
I know that makes it less cool (pun intended) but using an inactive volcanoes is more realistic
This episode was just Kyle ranting to his villian friends about the evils of Villian Real Estate and how he got scammed
Use tungsten it's melting point is higher than the heat that you said
Darth Vader: Right, my castle has been flooded with lava/magma... I'm going to need to move in with the Inquisitors on Nur, again.
Vader lived on a Lava Dam
@@nfrandom3701 Which would constitute stratification in progress, not to mention the toxic gases.
@bryan diaz varela good point, the helmet/life support allows him to survive in space so volcanic ash and gases wouldn't be that much of an issue.
@bryan diaz varelaI was referring more to the location and less to the specifics of Vader himself, but I see your point.
Hey Kyle, this got me thinking. In history class I learned about how they set aside Yellowstone National park during Western expansion. Yellowstone is a super volcano. It got me thinking about what would happen if they didn’t set aside that land that is a giant caldera, and the towns or cities started mining in the area. If the volcano erupted or the miners or drilling operations hit the wrong spot, it could end up like what would happen to an active volcano lair, except worse. Far worse. Would be an interesting villain plot, though, to get the caldera to erupt, because a Yellowstone eruption could destroy much of America, if not all of it.
That would make a wonderful video game plot.
Sshhhhh…. Don't give Darth Man-Bun ideas! But I don't think you can drill into a volcano to set it off, otherwise someone would have done it already by now.
@@theemissary1313 I'm pretty sure you can, you just wouldn't survive, or you have to use expensive robots which you might find an unjustifiable cost.
Kyle doesn't want to destroy the planet. His beef is with SUV drivers n cow farts n burps
Super volcanoes get their power by filling up an extremely large magma chamber before erupting. Yellowstone is currently 7-8% full and it needs to be 50% for an eruption to occur. So drilling into it won’t cause an eruption. Most people (but not all) would not dig there anyway since that might cause a new geyser to erupt.
If a lair is intended to be secret, then the construction alone would alert everyone. Save your money. Buy a town, dig a lair underneath it and use the residents as shields.
The funding comes from taxes
This sounds like Kyle trying to convince us to definitely not look for secret evil lair in a volcano.....which is why it should be the first place we look! Good try Kyle!
Each time Kyle wanna deny he's part of the eviL Villain, makes it more suspicious.
He tried so hard to become denial of his true form.
btw happy thursday or thor's-day which derived from jupiter.
Jupiter literally means 4th day of the week, and Kyle is thor...
no wonder he only made a nick name for jupi jup but no other planets.
Hmmm... another thing dangerous (I think) of having a lair within a volcano is the radiation. Repeated exposure to radiation/molten rocks can probably give you leukemia or other diseases. Also in the volcano, it constantly spurs out sulfur which is deadly to humans. I even remembered the episode in Dr. Stone where Senku uses silver to detect it where if it turns black, you must turn back.
Wait, lava's radioactive?
Its non ionising radiation IE visible light and infrared
I feel bad for evil bun Kyle having to be inside that volcano.
What about evil Jason?
Malagor! Malagor!
He destroyed the other Kyle and flaunted his skeleton at the end, a savage scientist indeed
...but what if you used a thick aerogel plating to protect the cavern you build into. Include an internal fabrication plant while also pumping in water to use for a boiler-based energy source, extensive climate control, heck... you might even discover a newer form of aerogel composited from the obsidian, volcanic rock, and even gases from the volcano.
I would become a supervillain that wears an absolute heat resistant suit and then firebombs gold reserves and the like and harvest the precious metal during the firebombing
What about a hollowed out blue whale turned into a submarine?
“Every good super villain, which we’re not”
Sure buddy
Today in another episode of How to be a Supervillain:
"Don't go looking for my lair in volcanoes."
What sort of technologies would vader be using on mustafar as that is where he lives.
the fictional sort
Force fields everywhere to protect the structures from the lava, as you can see in Revenge of the Sith. Plus a good dose of suspension of disbelief.
Lucas consulted with his two children that he kept by his side during the making of those films. This definitely sounds like an idea some trust fund kid would think up while not going to school.
Finally an episode where I might have a Super Nerd worthy comment. Kyle, another risk of operating near or on a volcano would be contracting pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis, which is a lung disease that can be contracted by inhaling ultra microscopic silicon particles emitted by a volcano. This also happens to be the longest word in the dictionary. Also my login password, for about 2 days, lol. Let the flame wars commence on how to pronounce this word.
I had my head buds in. I don't normally wear them when I watch your videos. Which are always great by the way! Anyway! That first volcanic lightning made me jump so far off my seat! Lol thanks for that
Kyle: "featuring xkcd"
Me: "Oh hell yeah!"
Taking a look at it, I don't think ANY volcano is a good idea, composite or otherwise. You're better off with an Arctic base. Freezing, difficult to fly planes over, and your biggest threat is climate change (which will destroy your base, but not at over 400 mph and over 2000°F)
The only problem with the Arctic is, thanks to the Cold War, the U.S., Russia and Canada all have sophisticated radar networks up there. Sneaking aircraft in or out could be hard. Antarctica might be a better choice, because it doesn’t really have any strategic value to anybody.
Yeah like arthur Williams said an artic base would be better. There is soild rock in some places.
If you made it an Antarctic base, you could probably engineer around climate change--build stilts through a thinner layer of ice deep enough to reach the ground, maybe
PLUS you'd be immune to any kind of tsunami size waves if you built it tall enough....perhaps reason to ACCELERATE climate change, and perhaps then create artificial earthquakes with subterranean nuclear detonations? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Weird coincidence, I got his "what if" book for Christmas.
Totally-not-a-supervillain Kyle bravely sacrificing his clones every episode to teach us. Thank you for your sacrifices.
Quick answer: their hot, they have gasses, and the have ash.
Actually living in space is the safest place you can live, studies have shown that 100% of deaths happen on earth.
Notice Kyle said "inside of *here*" - as in Kyle already built a secret layer inside volcano(s). This is just propaganda to reduce competition against other evil villains in taking prime real estate for secret lairs!!
Counterpoint: If there is a nearby river, you could duct fresh water into the volcano, set up massive heat exchangers with the lava tubes, and generate nearly inexhaustible amounts of electricity from the volcano. And if you utilize enough of that heat, you can effectively control the stability of the tubes and the volcano itself because drawing heat away from the magma causes it to cool and solidify instead of boring new paths into places you don't want it.
Kyle: a volcano is a rupture in the planets crust
Me: a planet pimple
Kyle: these crust cracks or planet pimples as no one calls them
Me: omg I'm special
No, you're nobody. You should be sad that you just got yeeted away from being somebody.
The strongest volcano explosion that I know is the one that affected Pompeii in 79 where the habitants were roasted by Vesuvius so fast that they didn't even feel the pain. What does not fit me is that the volcano is quite far from the affected city and yet its heat cooked them almost instantly.
The eruption from the Krakatow caused a small ice age around the globe and removed the island it stood on from existence.
*Laughs in Mantle Plumes*
It wasn't the heat that got Pompeii. It was the pyroclastic gasses that killed them.
Also, Look up Krakatoa. It puts Pompeii to shame.
Hey man! I’m really diggin’ the channel. 👍
2:57 Well, there goes the climax to the movie "Volcano" with Tommy Lee Jones. They used concrete barriers to divert lava.
OH MY GOD IT'S FEATURING XKCD GUYS IT'S HAPPENING GUYS AAAAAAAAAAAAA
EDIT: The "Citation needed." is killing me. It really is randall, huh
Hey when are you going to send me deliver of the"stuff" that I ordered for my "plan"
Got his book for Christmas! Great stuff so far!
This is all great information! Thanks Kyle, I’ll remember this when building my-...I mean...ordering my newest flavors of pizza...
I have read somewhere that the soil around erupted volcano becomes fertile... I think its because of minerals which comes out with ash/lava.....
Like a city which was evacuated due to volcanic activities near the town and after some time the vegetation around that place grow faster due to minerals provided by volcano...
So its a bad place for villain's lair but it could be a good place for villain's evil eco friendly garden....right?
EDIT:
Proof from internet-
"Volcanic eruptions result in the expulsion of ash which is spread out across wide areas both near and far from the volcanicmountain. Therefore, depending on the composition of the magma from a particular volcanic mountain, the resulting ash will have distinct amounts of soil nutrients."
AM I NERD NOW?
Prized San Marzano tomatoes (grown near Naples) are grown in the volcanic soil around Mt Vesuvius.
@@tiacho2893 are they special or more tasty??
@@piyushnagawat24 If you go into an Italian market and see ridiculously priced cans of tomatoes, they are probably San Marzanos from around Naples (IIRC, they have EU DOP status like Champagne(sparkling wine from a specific region)/Cognac (brandy from a specific region)/Gruyere (cheese from a specific region). The big thing with them is that they have less water than other varieties. So you get the intensity of fresh tomato flavour without having to cook out a lot of water when making sauces (also changing the flavour from fresh tomato to cooked tomato). I don't buy them (I usually use a good quality passata) but it is one of the mandatory ingredients for Neapolitan Pizza. As in, your restaurant loses it's certification by the pizza mafia if you sub another tomato. I don't spend the extra for them for day to day cooking.
Ah yes, a volcano lair,
Pros: free heating, hard to infiltrate
Cons: quakes, acid, sulfur, liquid hot magOH GOD PLEASE GET US OUT OF HERE THE WHOLE PLACE IS COMING DOWN I'M MELTING I'M MEEEEEELLTgaghaahgahgaggagahghghghgh....
Awesome combo of humans, awesome vid! Thanks for bringing smiles and science
3:37
8:04
that very subtle Austin powers reference ever time "liquid hot magma" is said.
Beautiful XD
Hey Kyle, love the show and of course I also love to see this collaboration with Randall Munroe! I got my copy of "What If?" signed by him in October!
Little nitpick: I think Randall just goes by his actual name; xkcd is not his personal online alias, but only the name of his most well-known project, the web comic.
Why build a lair in a volcano when you already have access to a location-less void of darkness?
In a story I'm writing, one of the big bads has set up base among a field of volcanoes, and as such, had to make two huge changes to how his evil schemes are ran in order to not be foiled by the volcanoes. First, there are no permanent man-made structures there, he keeps his entire cult nomadic, able to move as necessary and reducing the losses incurred from unexpected eruptions. Second, he had to hand out magical upgrades like candy to his henchmen, so that they can breathe the otherwise unbreathable air and will suffer no ill effects from any heat exposure, only applicable to living creatures. The most common cause of death within this cult is being crushed, but there's not much he can do about that, other than assign seers with the task of predicting the activity of the volcanoes, and they have about a 31% success rate.
5:23
That would explain why henchmen always fall so easily when they engage in fights with the main characters.
Their health is severely impaired from their long-time exposure to toxic and acidic fumes.
Hi Kyle, great video as usual. I was wondering if you could do a video on how to create a real superhero suit like the video on how to make a real superhero serum. Keep up the good work!
KYLE! First time commenting but have been a fan of the show for quite some time. Keep up the good work! You’re right, the reality of a volcanic evil lair, not that you’d ever have use for one, would be not only expensive but unintentionally beautiful. If the primary component of the structure were made of diamond then it could theoretically withstand the intensity of the heat produced by flowing lava. It would also probably be best put at the very top of the volcano where it would not have to worry so much about the constantly shifting and changing lava flows. At the top it could also work as a kind of fan(also diamond) to further shoot the gas away from vents pulling clean air into the lair.
Best video in a long time!
We need an mini series of videos exploring options for best villain lair !
Oh and do moon base next !
Hey Kyle, loved the show!
Also I had an idea for a much more plausible and possibly even more dastardly evil lair. Occuring in Venezeula, the Catatumbo lightning, while not exactly being never ending, exists nearly 300 days out of the year. Now imagine a super villian was to build his lair there. He wouldn't just have a very villiany location, he would have a boost to his power supply (assuming he harvests it) and a natural, active aeriel (possibly ground) defence system.
But even if the lightning isn't a viable resource or defensive mechanism, it would be an excellent location for the all time classic weather we often find super villians' lairs to be located in, when seen in movies and cartoons.
As for the defense, I was thinking maybe a few lightning rods to bring the lightning, and some way to channel that through to the ground around your lair (like an evil sidewalk), and given that this all occurs near a lake, you would even have the perfect location for all your freakin' laser sharks.
PS I know you listed lightning as one of your reasons but these are super villians we're talking about. They can probably work with it.
Can't believe you got Randall Monroe to work with you. That's so cool!
Hey Kyle, great video! However... I have a few ideas of why a volcano layer would be a great layer, more than just looking cool.
Issue #1: Temperature / Magma.
Solution: The best way to build a layer with this in mind is using Tungsten, since it has a melting point of 3422C which is much higher than the temperature of the magma. With a bit of reinforcement behind it and engineering, you could make a layer be able to withstand it. Now here is the fun part. What about all the excess heat leaking in? Setting up a water tank next to the walls, pressurizing it, and some engineering, you can now create a system to superheat the water, boil it, and now power your layer via steam turbines. (I suggest using a volcano near a water source like an ocean). This way you can constantly cycle new cold water to absorb the heat, use the heat for power, and use a small portion of the power to run the steam through condensers and pumps to cycle more cold water back into the system.
Issue #2: Being a layer, you need to hide yourself from the "good guys".
Solution: A volcano has lots of heat and thick rocks to help minimize others from discovering your secret layer via thermal detection as well xray.
Issue #3: Poisonous gasses?
Solution: Utilize a centrifuge system to isolate the gasses and store them for your layers activities, such as science experiments! And really, just make a scrubber/burner system to filter out the air of CO2 and recycle the oxygen for breathing. Think submarine. You don't "need" outside gasses if you can build a safe container.
No perfect evil lair is easy to get, and volcanoes come with a devastating built in self destruct system.
Maybe that’s why they have that self-destruction button.
Push the button when you realize everything’s going bad so that it looks intentional.
Love the show thank you for partnering with Randall Munroe.
Most of the issues would be mitigated by their power source. Most villans (citation needed) have some type of large nuclear, fusion, or fictional power that they could then use as they need. Such as cooling around their lair so that the magma and acid would be an active threat. Heat shields and heat exchangers would be working overtime, but that's a small price to pay. The power some would also be able to power filtration systems to provide clean air and water. However, this would still be impractical because you would be essentially be building a skyscraper inside the volcano to house it all.
While the lighting storms would be a constant EM issue, if you could afford to build a base in a volcano, you would have the funds to run a comminations line a mile away to have clean and uninterrupted communications.
Hi Kyle, love the show the only building material i think that would work is synthetic diamond i know when some diamonds are mined they are cleaned in some of the most corrosive acids that a robot has to drop them in and retrieve them in a secure room that people can't even be in because of the acid. So if the supervillain can figure out how to make a lab grown diamonds big enough to build walls, floors, windows, and support beams i think he can have a volcano lair thats as strong as diamond
Volcanic ash is actually a very good fertilizer, so you could plant a garden in your volcano lair, and make it self sufficient. Plus, geothermal vents.
But what about an lair on an abandoned oil rig? They seemed to be the perfect place for a bond villian! Tidal energy, shark pens, easy place to city destroying sheningans, you have it all.