Telling You the Truth
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- čas přidán 12. 10. 2023
- I wanted to finally open up about what my life has really been like.
Please note: there's flashing candlelight from 13:54 to 14:27.
Mental health looks different for everyone, so these are just my experiences and what I have learned along the way.
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🌙 Books I read, supplies I use, gear I film with (affiliate links): www.amazon.com/shop/v.birchwood
🪡 Follow me on Instagram - / vasibirchwood
📖 Business inquiries - vbirchwood@helmtalentgroup.com
Some of my favourite mental health-related books, podcasts, videos (not affiliated):
Podcasts & Videos:
-Gathering Gold podcast with Sheryl Lisa Finn
-Holistic Life Navigation podcast with Luis Mojica
-Therapist Uncensored podcast with Sue Marriott, LCSW, CGP & Ann Kelley, PhD
-@heidipriebe1 on CZcams (for videos on attachment theory)
Books:
-The Wisdom of Anxiety by Sheryl Lisa Finn (née Paul)
-Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel S. F. Helle
-The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.
-Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson
-The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron
I am not a doctor and none of this is medical advice. If you are in emotional distress, please contact your doctor, emergency services, or 988lifeline.org/ - Zábava
![I Found My Adopted Father's Heritage... Can I Sew the Clothes? [Part 1]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/1Ri2ZM3HMeI/mqdefault.jpg)
I wanted to finally open up about what my life has really been like ❤
Please note: there's flashing candlelight from 13:54 to 14:27.
Mental health looks different for everyone, so these are just my experiences and what I have learned along the way.
Also, I am not a doctor and none of this is medical advice. If you are in emotional distress, please contact your doctor, emergency services, or 988lifeline.org/
Thinking of you Vasi ❤ and sending you love. Thankyou for your videos, because of you I made my first 1850s skirt completely from scratch, and I'm registered blind, so this was no mean feat but you made it so easy I managed to do it 😊 thankyou for everything ❤
Wow , thank you for your beautiful comment@@welcometotheravensnest
Congrats on the 1850s skirt! I hope you enjoy wearing it for many years to come 😊
Thank you for sharing this. I have PTSD along with several chronic physical illnesses so life is rarely easy and I take joy in all the bright moments. Sending you love always forever.
I see you ❤ everything that you have just so perfectly addressed has plagued myself since I was but a small child.
Wishing you peace & joy and that you always gain the strength to grow day by day. Sending love ❤.
@@VBirchwood Have you ever considered collaborating with (or at least looking up) the CZcamsrs Paige Layle and "I'm Autistic, Now What"?
I'm on the Autism Spectrum (diagnosed PDD-NOS when I was 3), and hearing you talk about having to muster enough energy to actually do stuff was all too relatable.
I don't think any creator should feel obligated to do a "day in my life" video. That said, your struggles with mental health issues resonate for me and I'm grateful for your vulnerability and openness. CPTSD is a real pain, right? I'm glad you've come to a better place with yourself. We all deserve to experience a life of joy and safety. ❤
And the cinematography in this video is just gorgeous.
I agree 😊 Thank you so much! So glad you enjoyed the video ❤
@@VBirchwood I think that video with "day in my life" invade to much creator private live. You share with us your passion and pov on life. That should be enough
The borderline between private and public is very blurred on CZcams and you tread it with courage and delicacy, which is having (even just from the comments) a positive impact on so many people.
But don’t ever feel you’ll lose your audience if you step back away from the personal. Your content very much speaks for itself - every carefully planned, beautifully filmed and meticulously edited shot says as much about joy/gratitude/quiet living as anything you tell us about your experiences. Such is the nature of the very best paradoxical relationships.
Filling the cup to the brim and taking in the first sips to avoid spilling when picking up the cup might be the most relatable moment I've seen on a CZcams video
I also have C-PTSD, and had an odd feeling that was where you were going with this. Sending love & healing your way. 🌈
Thank you!! Sending lots of love and healing your way also. It's incredible how many of us that experience c-PTSD share similarities with our stories (whilst of course many differences too).
I randomly found this video. I really needed it. I cried through a lot of it because it made me feel less alone in my suffering and my own C-PTSD. I have been doing EMDR for my trauma as well. It’s taking a long time but it’s slowly working healing miracles in my life. I’m so sorry for your hurt and suffering. ❤️Thank you so much for this video. It was very touching and helpful for me. ❤️
Thank you so much for your beautiful comment. Wishing you continued healing, peace, and joy 💕
@@VBirchwood ❤️
"The Body Keeps Score" was the book that helped me start freling safe in my body with CPTSD. It is wonderful and healing to see comraderie and solidarity expressed in your video and the comments. We are not alone. ❤ Im very proud of everyone here for doing their best to take care of themselves when they can. We deserve it.
It's a wonderful book! I'm so glad you're feeling safer in your body too 🥰 I'm so proud of everyone here as well, we are all so deserving of lives filled with love and joy (and to really feel safe in that joy) ❤️
I am sooo happy you are doing better and finding more joy in your life. It is so hard to find contentment whith PTSD/c-PTSD. Your hard work is paying off and I am grateful you feel safe enough to share this with us.❤
Thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for opening up. It took me years (close to two decades) to finally get the help I needed. It's not that there weren't any health professionals around, but that I tried so desperately to "have" what they diagnosed me with. Certainly, three years ago, the landlord canceled my lease, my boss cut my hours, than Covid and I got let go from my job while in a psychiatric hospital. And finally, I met the woman who changed my life, my therapist. It was tough going, I went through the motions but now I have a new job, finally the lessons learnt are not mere intellectual ideas but have real life use. And I look around and am carefully joyful. Sometimes I am scared that it will be snatched away, this hope, finally having MY space in society.
Thank you for having the strength to tell your story. People talk how they survived cancer and we, who have survived "ourselves" (I have tried to be gone several times), feel almost ashamed of talking about our remarkable journey.
Stay safe, stay content, stay connected. Much love from Germany!
I'm very glad you're here.
I knew my tears would start welling up soon ❤ Thank you so much!
@@VBirchwood you are welcome, and I am very proud of you.
You have every right to keep your life as private or public as you want. But I am truly grateful for what you shared in this video, this is exactly what I needed to hear today; I teared up many times throughout it. I am struggling with my mental health, but am unable to do anything about it at present. Thank you for being vulnerable. You didn't have to be, but because you were, I don't feel so alone anymore.
Also, this was incredibly brave of you ❤
Thank you ❤
As someone on their own complex mental health journey, thank you for sharing your story. Therapy really should be fully accessible to everyone any any country that doesn't permit this is doing their citizens a major disservice and costing themselves (or their citizens, depending on whether they have universal health care or not), far more money down the line in medical bills.
The 14-minute and 53-second video felt more like a powerful TED talk on self-love, self-care, and inner peace than a typical "day in my life" CZcams video. Although I may not personally relate to the struggles mentioned, I truly appreciate the determination and strength it takes to share such intimate details. This kind of content is rare and valuable on CZcams these days. Thank you again for the beautifully made video and content. ~ Your new subscriber.
brave! you're amazing, keep going and best of luck with the mental/physical health going forwards
Thank you very much 😊
I have PTSD and ADD and the “doing the simplest of things each day has been a challenge for me” really resonated. Getting into a routine, sticking with it and not just floating through life unaware is such a hard thing to overcome, especially when you would rather not be present/have the memories flood in. ❤ you’re one of my favorite people online. Thank you for this glimpse into your life.
Seeing you in this light gives me hope that my c-ptsd won't always keep me from enjoying life. Miigwetch (thank you) for being here and for sharing your experience.
❤️❤️❤️
I can relate; my depression began at age 11, too. I eventually learned I'm autistic, years too late for any help in childhood, and that helped a bit, just knowing. But I still struggle, and am watching this video with wide eyes and even renewed hope. I really admire your bravery and spirit, and see SUCH an old soul when I look at you. I can tell you've been through a lot, yet here you are, being present every moment. I wish you all the good luck and happy surprises in the world.
This is an extremely brave and bold video. Thank you so much for your openness, and I hope that you continue to be well from now on. Massive hugs to you 🤗🤗🤗
I'm glad you found the correct diagnosis! I'm a fellow c-PTSD sufferer. I'm impressed at all the things you did in this video, it's so very calming. I hope to find energy to do more cosy things like you did here 😊
Thank you for your courage to tell your story. It helps those of us who aren't ready to tell our own yet.
Thank you for your bravery in sharing this, and I'm so glad you got the correct diagnosis. I, too, spent years in therapy with an incorrect set of diagnoses, plateauing after minimal progress. Two years ago, I started with a new therapist who recognized that I had C-PTSD in our first session. (I am grateful for her expertise, as the current psychiatric discourse recognizes that emotional abuse can also cause PTSD, even though the DSM has not yet caught up to acknowledge it, too.) My progress in that time has been astounding. I have cut contact with my abusers, grown in my Christian faith, am actively improving my relationships, and have so much hope from my decrease in symptoms. As you shared in your video, it truly is life-changing. ❤
I'm so proud of you, you really have moved mountains to be where you are now! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️❤️ I appreciate you sooo much 🥰
I'm unsure if I should "thank you" for this video; that sounds a bit... I don't know, I can't explain it. But I'm still going to say thank you. And thank you for not giving up. I lost my best friend from depression a couple of years ago, and since then (in only these two and a half years), I've felt there are so many new things, new ways to treat people, and new explanations for past diagnoses that I feel angry she didn't keep on going for a little bit longer. But I totally understand why she gave up; that's the scary and sad part. It also makes me even more grateful for everyone else who keeps on going, knowing (only secondhand, though) how hard it is to keep on going when it seems like not just the world but your whole body is working against you.
I also want to say thank you for your videos! They're so good and so different from others. I love the slow pace
This resonated so much with me. At 58 yrs old I have taken a back seat on the world. I just want to be able to get through each day as well as I can. I am happy in my existence, probably the happiest I have ever been. My crafts are my salvation and I am grateful for every day of peace. Hoping you continue to progress and Thankyou for sharing.
Well done, Angela!
I turn 58 this year, so I can relate on that level.
Happiness may be fleeting, but gratitude is much more long lasting.
You are incredibly courageous to open up as you have. I hope that responses will show that you are not alone! So many people, especially in recent years have become mentally unwell. I think that beautiful, sensitive souls suffer most, and it is not their fault, but the fault of a world that lacks empathy and compassion all too often. Your videos are beautiful and inspirational to so many! The world needs that, and the world needs you!
Thank you for sharing. My husband has CPTSD. You are right that healing is so dependent on the right therapist and environment. It is so lovely to hear you on the path to recovery.
Thank you 😊 wishing all the best to you and your husband as well!
ADHD and depression here, the depression being caused by undiagnosed ADHD. During my worst times of depression, I stayed in a darkened room all day and couldn't do anything. That lasted for about 2 years. I still feel that this time of my life was just... lost. I didn't really live it, it simply passed me by while I was standing still. So I get what you mean. I find it incredibly courageous that you opened up in this manner and talked about it so openly, because this is really, really hard. And I'm so happy for you that you're feeling better. But please know that you don't have to do that again just because you did it once. Everyone needs at least the privacy of their own head.
I love who you are; it took a lot of guts to make this video. I have been very fortunate in life, but have seen these things up close and personal for people that I care for immensely.
I think that you are beautiful, clear and trustworthy as a person.
Best wishes - and you are very brave.
as someone who also suffered severe trauma their entire life until the past 4-5 years, I really appreciated this video. cptsd is so hard and I feel like a lot of people don't understand it, because in a lot of ways, we ourselves don't even know how to put our feelings into words (at least for me.)
we are on the same journey, it seems. Somatic, overintellectualized, dissociated and isolated. I really feel that I'm attracted to your videos because that work of connecting to the indigenous roots of our ancestors, to the lessons they taught that we never had the chance to learn, whether in sewing, cooking, tending the land, tending our bodies- this is the same work as somatic healing. We are all slowly reforesting the place that our soul lives. Reforesting our own selves, and ending the reign of terror from which we all feel as generational scars.
best wishes, may your bowl never be empty
Never change, unless you want to.
But you are a absolutely wonderful person.
At times I wonder how disturbing it is that we have created a society in which we watch CZcamsrs who just show themselves. Seriously, it is absurd in many ways.
Then I come across someone like you.
Watching you, with your backstory is like reading a fine book on how we could do it differently, dare I say better? Not to do exactly what you do but rather to be ourselves, unadulterated, to slow down.
Please, amidst the many people showing what they eat, their hauls, flaunting consumerism, backing up brands like Temu, showing off money and lifestyles… there you are….
If I had been a CZcamsr we would have at least 2 things in common.
I too would remain private and I too would share my mental struggles because if the people with a Voice, the so- called influencers ( Very much dislike that concept.) don‘t use it to break down the shame surrounding being neurodivergent… who will?….
Really funny, I was just ready to ditch CZcamsrs and here you are.
More normal than the mainstream and more special than those trying so hard to catch attention.
Happy I have come across you.
You really show you get to make different choices.
This 50- year woman has loads of respect for you.
Keep showing them, the world even if it is just you being, you…. :).
Have a lovely day and big hugs.
Once again I'm so moved by a video of you 🖤 Being so vulnerable is truly admirable, I wish you all the best in your healing journey, so happy you're getting better!
Thank you so much 🥰
I cried a little seeing your real smile ❤ So much of what you’ve shared echoes my own experiences, especially dissociation. I’m so glad to hear you have some excellent supports, and it’s helping. Thank you for your openness. I hope it feels healing 💕
Thank you so much for showing this kind of courage. I have been in some kind of psycho - /body therapy since I was 24 - now I am 64. Some Years ago I learned about the terms: C PTSD and Developmental Trauma - and it is changing my life. It is first and foremost focusing on the whole person and on different ways to work with trauma and not just speech therapy. I have also paid most of the therapy myself - could probably have bought a new house for the money. For me it has been a question of life or no life at all. I am now starting on the last path of my pilgrim road working with Internal Family System to sort some deeply traumatic issues out. thank you again for your honesty.
This comment is very late, but I just wanted to applaud your bravery and willingness to be vulnerable and share this part of yourself. Thank you.
So glad you have an excellent therapist and that you're getting into a better place. Also braiding sweetgrass is an amazing book.
Your honesty is greatly appreciated. I’ve had to experience much of that myself- from my perspective, I can relate.
I tried living like a healthy person, ignoring my disability, and of course it wasnt working, therapy, meds and learning about my disability helped a little bit, the accomodations I could make for myself, but it wasnt enough. Today I talked with my psychiatrist about getting official disability status, he said with my ADHD and long lasting Depression and anxienty I will probably get it. This would also help me find a job that I can manage. And I also am the type of person who tries to help others especially if they have simmilar things going yet I very often forget to help myself.
Sad to hear about your struggles, but I'm so happy that you're doing better now. I wish you a life full of peace, health and happiness. You deserve it.
This video truly spoke to my soul, and to my experience dealing with my own mental health. I too have been diagnosed with OCD (pure O) and adhd. I cannot even being to express how grateful I am for the creation of such a wise, compassionate and inspiring video. Several moments lead me to bawl from feeling recognized and seeing as to how I am still not alone, no matter how long or complex my journey. Your words about the body doing the best it can to protect itself opened up the floodgates for addressing the frustration I often feel with myself for presenting symptoms. I held myself while I wept, asking myself for forgiveness for being so hard on me, and recognizing every part of me is doing the best it can. This is truly a piece of art I will be referencing in the future. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
I have a similar story, many therapist tried but failed, some made things worse. It was actually a boyfriend that helped me understand life events that happened to me was causing my sense of detachment and pain.
If you ever want to talk, just know this internet stranger is always here. Thank you for being your beautiful self
Thank you very much for this. yes we need to share our experiences with mental health more, and, idk, bleach out the stigma still associated with it. Again, thank you. I felt I learned, re-learned and remembered many important things listening and watching. I also had learned that depersonalisation creeping in again is the warning sign for me that reads "that´s it, you´re not ok, take a break, or we are going back to the dreary place". I am happy for you that you are feeling better, and I am amazed by what you built for yourself, I really am. It seems a beautiful place. I think we have a similar style of cooking.
I wish you all the best for your journey into the sun.
C-ptsd sucks, thank you for sharing ❤
Thank you for being so open, i relate to this so much as someone who also has adhd and suspected cptsd, i learned a lot from the youtube channel crappy childhood fairy (she has cptsd herself) i highly recommend watching her- she's great. Im so happy for you getting good treatment, I'd love to try emdr I've heard many good things. I am inspired by your ability to share such private things about yourself and how hard you've worked to live this life- i can relate to a lot of what you have described and it gives me hope to see someone i can relate to living in a way i didn't think possible. Wishing you well ❤
As someone who has been on a long path of healing myself, I’m so proud of you for keeping the light of hope alive in your heart. 💕
What a great Statement! You are doing wonderful Work. And from my own experience, i can ashure you ist's getting better and better. Mantras helped a lot,aswell ss Dancing, knitting, sewing,crochetting. And Long walks outside! 30 years after the Same diagnosis treated at first traditionel i learned the Body needs more. Maybe a glance at the four Wind school of Dr. Villoldo may bring another piece of Feeling whole and Safe. Be blessed
I struggle with mental health. It most often have felt like my brain is attacking itself for no reason, because I am and have been fortunate through my life. A cancer of the mind perhaps.
A correct diagnosis is in my experience vital, I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome in 2019 and the sheer relif and understanding that gave me about my life was immense. It also allowed the medical professionals to distinguish what was and was not 'damage' better, to understand me better.
A truly touching, beautiful and brave piece, I'm so glad you took the path you are now on ❤🙏ॐ मणि पद्मे हूँ 🙏❤
Thank you for sharing this part of your experience. As someone with c-ptsd who only started enjoying life to a noticeable degree about two years ago, this video was extremely comforting and relatable to watch. I am as deeply sorry you had to struggle for so long as I am happy to know things are finally getting significantly better for you. Something you mentioned that hit home in particular for me was feeling not only better in your own body, but like you can be present in it at all, and at peace with that. This feeling is in part what helps me recognize how much happier I am and how much better I'm healing now. Things still get really tough sometimes of course, but now they don't feel so much like they're deciding factors in whether or not I can make it another day. For anyone else struggling with these things: It does get worse, at first. But then it gets so, so, so, SO much better. Trust me.
You have the same dishes as my grandmother. She was also a Buddhist, though she came to it later in life.
I was diagnosed with PTSD as a teenager. I'm still here, mostly out of sheer stubbornness.
Thank you for your honest, hopeful video.
I can understand a little bit of what you are going through. I suffer from depression and PTSD. My life is very uneventful. My 8 kids are in school. I sleep until noon and force myself to get up and do some chores. My kids come home and I try to cook dinner and help them. My husband supports the family.
I am a devout Catholic, and most weeks the only time that I get out is Sunday morning Mass. I use CZcams as a distraction from what bothers me. When I turn off the CZcams, is when I struggle the most. It's just easier to keep the background noise so that I don't have to think about my life. I have gone through therapy before, but it doesn't actually help my situation. So, at this point, I would rather cope without it.
Thank you for your candor Vasi.
Thank you for listening ❤
That soup looks so delicious - full of most of my favorite ingredients! Gotta give these parsnips a bit of a tryout. I think I'll give this a go next week as we're heading into chilly weather and I need to increase my store of quick and easy recipes. Thank you ...
Firstly, thank you so very much for sharing your very personal life with us all. I know full well the challenges of Complex PTSD as a result of childhood trauma. I've strugled with depression since I was 16, and began counseling at 27. I've been on antidepressants for going on 30yrs now.
Secondly, I'm very relieved to hear you've found effective and compassionate counseling. From personal experience, I can honestly say that a good counselor is truly a lifesaver.
Thirdly, I also deal with OCD, but mildly so. It rarely manifests itself; usually evident as anxiety triggered by childhood trauma experiences.
Fourthly, a rewarding spiritual life/practice is absolutely essential in dealing with mental illness/trauma. Speaking of which, I applaud your openness about mental illness awareness, and your intentions for increased access to care.
Lastly, do what makes you truly happy. I can say that I greatly appreciate your including us in this. Remember, also, that your private life is yours alone, and is no business of mine or anyone else's.
Take care of yourself first always!
ah to feel joy again. it's basically my life goal at this point and once I can feel true joy again I want to enjoy life as much as I can. I don't really care about anything else when it comes to me, anything else I do is for the people I love and their future, otherwise I probably would be somewhere else rn. I call it learning to live again and I'm fortunate enough to live in a country that gives me chance after chance to do that.
I've been watching and enjoying your videos a lot, and this one particularly spoke to me, as someone who has also a history of struggling with mental health. I'm really so glad that you found such a great therapist and that you feel so much better
2:07-2:40
I feel that so much. Thank you for putting it so beautifully.
This was such a beautiful, touching, and relatable video. I've personally found IFS (Internal Family Systems) therapy ideas similarly helpful, though I'm still on my own path. For me I found that IFS's non-pathologizing parts work has paired well somatic and EMDR work. And yes, I *really* related to how you mentioned that you've just consumed many books and podcasts on different therapy modalities and information as a way of intellectualizing. I think personally IFS offered me a way to actually look inside my mind and physically feel my personal protective structures, how they've tried to help me even when they've hurt me, and the life experiences that created them. It's so incredibly valuable to be able to find a way back to your body and to find new peace within. This was very moving. I'm happy for you and I wish you all the best ❤
I’m so glad you’re feeling safe and happier! A slow life is SO GOOD for our mental health!
I am glad that you found some measure of peace. It took me years before I was even ready for therapy to treat what was ultimately diagnoses as chronic and complex combat related PTSD from my multiple tours in the early years in Iraq. So, do I get a cookie for the Three Cs? Meh, jokes aside, I do like your content and I'm glad I found it today. I needed something uplifting, and your week of medieval food video delivered!
Hi V, I only came across your channel the other day (love the content about historical clothing btw) so I wasn't expecting one of the videos to be like this. I am struggling with some similar mental health issues, and have been most my life, so I would just like to say thank you for this video. It's been hard for me recently and this touched me in a way that little else has in recent memory, and given me a glimmer of hope I've really been needing. Right place and right time. You seem like such a wonderful soul, and the empathy you show here is so sincere and powerful. I hope I can emulate at least some of what you've demonstrated - thanks for giving this hopeless soul a small spark of a better tomorrow
Thank you for this! I never expect you or anyone else to share personal information or feelings they aren't comfortable sharing. Sometimes it is a truth we need to share, even though it is also difficult to be so vulnerable, and those stories are very valuable!
It can be very disheartening to constantly be faced with doubt and ignorance when you try to reach out for support and use your voice to gain some understanding, so I find it immensely valuable to have these shared experiences with others who do understand - and to find different perspectives on similar experiences. I have self-diagnosed myself (as it isn't even a formal diagnosis yet) with cPTSD which is strongly interlinked with growing up as an undiagnosed autistic ADHDer with (still undiagnosed) somatic issues. The only times I've felt better and like I might recover somewhat from chronic burnout/fatigue and depression has been when I have taken measures to treat the trauma.
Unfortunately, I don't have access to appropriate therapy right now, so I have to treat it the best I can on my own. But having some sense of community is a vital part of healing, I think. Especially when attachment is wounded.
Thank you for sharing your truth. ❤
❤
I'm 60. I've been working on my issues for four decades. I've had many diagnosis. Sometimes they help. I've learned to keep trying different things when the current one stops being useful. Please keep at it. I have experienced wonderful progress in my healing and my overall health. I have even found muscles in my face that I never felt before when my body relaxed enough to let me really smile. The improvement in your life is truly worth the effort. It's very important to share your journey, for you and for others. Thank you for sharing.
Labels and diagnoses are simply tools, and getting a diagnosis is only the beginning of a healing process, not the end goal. Remember that the bravest thing you can do if you’re struggling is to ask for help. You have been incredibly brave, Vasi, and you still are. You’ve found your way, and are still finding your way, through a world that isn’t always built for how your brain works, and doing the best you can to make your stay in it a good one.
Agreed 😊 Asking for help and support is so vital.
@@VBirchwood
I’m so glad to see you settle into your current situation and becoming content and joyful in it.
@@VBirchwood
(Looks like I edited my comment while you were replying to it.)
@@ragnkja just read the rest of your comment. Thank you so so much!! I’m always so grateful for your support 🥰
You are a very brave and lovely young lady, I have had some real problems in the past and sometimes they come back, listening to you has helped me no end. I wish you all the very best. Oh, I love your videos, thank you.
How deeply personal and brave was this video!! I have also struggled with depression and other areas most of my life. Last November I started up with therapy and am feeling amazingly different now.
So, our stories are obviously different but maybe the experience of longing to be free and happy is the same!
And then there is lovely sewing that many people enjoy, or other fiber crafts which quietly soothe our savage souls...along with some tea and coffee!
I count it a privilege to know you and appreciate your enriching content!
I'm so glad that you're getting better. Having mental health issues can be very difficult, as I can attest to myself. In my case, medication has helped a lot, but it's mainly just to help me not sink down too low. I think having a good support system is the best thing anyone could have, and I don't know where I would be without mine.
I'm also glad that you acknowledged that not every therapist is for everyone - you definitely have to click with the person you're going to. (Mine talked a lot, which wasn't very helpful, so I stopped going to see them.)
I hope you have the space to be yourself, to feel, and to really experience your life. Good luck with your mental health journey!
❤Love❤ I agree so strongly about the importance of access to mental health care.
I don't have c-PTSD but I do have PTSD there are days where the anxiety just goes through the roof. When I got pregnant with my youngest we packed up our family and moved in with my in laws. It was only supposed to be temporary. A launching pad for what was supposed to be a new chapter in our lives. Without going into all the details I will say that the opportunity we thought we had was abruptly taken away from us. Leaving us stuck living in my husband's parent's spare bedroom with 4 small children and a surprise baby on the way. The feelings of insecurity left me in a bad place. So when surprise baby was born I developed postpartum depression. Let me tell you that kinda of depression hurts in the bones. I got real good at hiding my depression from people. It was easier to put on a face and pretend I was happy when I wasn't. It took taking a gamble and moving to another state without a job secured to finally break the depression. It was almost instantly that my husband found a job and we were back standing on our own. It took a lot of bible reading and learning to trust Jesus to finally break the depression. I still have the PTSD but since moving to the homestead and homeschooling my kids, I now have more good days than bad. It took finding peace to truly be able to enjoy life and my children again. So you are not a lone in your journey of trying to stay mentally well. As a creator you shouldn't feel obligated to make a day in my life video. Nor should you feel that you have to explain to everyone why you are the way you are. We all have struggles. Some are physical and others are mental. As a CZcamsr you are already putting a certain amount of transparency out there. You are not just making things you are putting yourself out there for all the world to see. That takes quite a bit of courage as it is. Stay strong and keep finding joy and peace. Know that you are not alone. See you in two weeks. Hopefully with some cute puppy action.
😭 you’re so amazing! I’m older than you and no where close to being as intelligent and achieved as you are so def should be proud of yourself.
You're so amazing!! I've been through a very similar journey as you and found a lot of peace and comfort in sewing and creating clothing based on historical techniques. For me, this helped me to get into my body, to slow down and take space to be more intentionally and this helped me to not only create distance from some of the habits and cultural stuff that was hurting me, but to also reflect on who I wanted to be and how I wanted to live. It's been such a rare privilege to be able to witness your journey.
We approach life from differing theological views (Christianity vs Buddhism) but even within those there are similar truths that echo. I know you will have hard days ahead still - times when it feels like circumstance has taken a side road and the strength you built up has abandoned you. I pray you continue to trust what you have learned, what your body has learned, and the support you have surrounding you and know that you will come through! Praying for peace and continued healing in your life! You are a beautiful person inside and out, and you deserve to hear that every day.
Alot of things has kept me frustrated n lost about myself I'm glad n grateful to have come across your channel...I deal with major depression, ocd, and PTSD ...I just want u to know watching this today was more helpful than u will ever know😊❤ thank u so much
I only just found your channel today, and I'm so happy I did! This video especially really resonated with me. Your mental and physical health journey sounds very similar to mine, and hearing you speaking about it made me feel seen and less alone
I can really relate to the story of misdiagnosis. Someone very close to me had been in therapy for about 20 years without anything really fundamentally changing the cycle of depressive episodes and anxiety until they finally found the right combination of therapists who attempted yet a new diagnosis and treatment and it finally worked and they have been happier and healthier in the last years than I ever saw them before. They also never gave up in seeking support and ultimately it worked. It's still very hard to live with trauma, but now there is hope of a somewhat peaceful life not dominated by fear. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so glad you found the right path for you and I wish that you continue to heal and grow!
From another who struggles with mental health; I see you, and I appreciate you.
You've had a rough life. Houselessness is incredibly traumatic, and I'm sorry that was your life for a year.
It can be so hard for any of us with C-PTSD and PTSD to even reckon with our lives. The right therapist is like a small miracle happening. Thank you for showing a part of your life (and please please please please PLEASE share some of your recipes. Your food looks amazing.)
Vulnerability is powerful. Thank you for sharing
Thank you for sharing such a personal side of your life. It can be hard to share something so personal. I see such an amazing person and feel previledged to be able to have this peek into your journey. Wishing you continued growth and prosperity and I look forwards to seeing all that you are willing to share with us.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I was happy to see Luis Mojica's podcast in your list of recommendations; his course, membership and teachings in general have been HUGE for me in understanding and (most importantly) relating to trauma.
Thank you so much for watching!
Luis Mojica’s work has been huge for my healing as well, so that’s lovely to hear you’ve been so impacted by it as well ❤️
Hear, hear. Thank you for endorsing the help that mental health practitioners can give. I've gotten real help and support dealing with my bi-polar diagnosis. I try to support the rollback of mental health stigma. I enjoyed this video and a glimpse into your life. BTW, yummy looking soup!
Thank you so much for sharing.
Your so encouraging, and give me so much hope for my future self.
Thank you! I’m wishing you all the best, you’ve got this 🥰
Thank you for sharing. It helps more than you might know. Bless you.
Thank you for vulnerably and so articulately sharing your experience with mental health issues and in therapy. I’m so grateful that you are improving after so many years of suffering. ❤ As a therapist with similar mental health issues, I can relate to your experience. Thank you for growing awareness of CPTSD. Although it’s not a DSM diagnosis yet, continuing raising awareness might help change that. There are some professionals that have knowledge and training in treating it, but not as many as we need. There’s a huge gap between those seeking mental health treatment and therapists being able to treat them with more than short-term treatments. Thank you for adding to the effort to destigmatize long-term and pervasive mental health issues. I wish you continued healing, joy, and perseverance to live life in your body to its fullest.
I'm so happy for you that you are doing better, overcoming past trauma, and getting good help. I sympathize deeply. I have felt numb and depressed for years after a bad car accident, so nothing to compare with trauma, but bad enough. You are a beautiful wonderful person inside and out, you deserve love and happiness.
Dear Vasi, I stumbled across your channel only a month or so ago and I have thoroughly enjoyed watching all your videos as I sew. Your words and gentleness and your dedication to research and sewing really resonates and inspires me. I had wrongly assumed that your life was without its troubles as I think we're prone to do with the snippets we get of people's lives online and I suppose it also acts as an excuse personally as to why I can't have the beautiful and ease-filled Iife I assume you have. This video made me aware of my own faults but also made me all the more endeared to you. So much of what tou described reflects in my own life and its always uncanny to think how much more connected we all are (even from on the other side of the globe!) than we are different. Anyway, thank you for being you and for your honesty. It was a humbling experience 🌼
You are already helping others as I think this video will really help someone out there who needs it. I wish you the very best going forward. And that smile you how now seem so pretty and genuine. I look forward to seeing it more often.
Thank you for sharing this. I'm appreciating it as fellow cptsd sufferer. It's only for a good, I'm sure you are helping someone with sharing your story ❤
Thank you for making this video, it gives inspiration and hope to those who also deal with mental health struggles.
Thank you. Inspired by your words, I did some important selfcare today (that I tend to push off). I'm glad you're doing well and able to create fun content. Take care.
Hello! I just want to say how much I love your videos - I've been going through so much personally and these videos are honestly amazing for me. I'm fairly new to your channel, but I've been keeping your videos playing on my switch on my day to day basis, I know I might sound silly but your like a friend I'm here with every time I have your videos. I can't type fully how much I fully appreciate everything you mentioned in this video and also what your content has helped me in general. But I will say, thank you. Thank you so much.
thank you so much for this video. i always think that people doing great suff around the internet have it better than me. this helped me see how much good there is in my life already and that i dont need to be in perfect shape to create something i believe in :)
I'm so glad to hear that you have been able to get a diagnosis that is correct for you & that you have gotten better help for your mental health. ❤❤❤
i really appreciate this video. i've always been a hopeful person at my core, which is why my experiences with mental health challenges feel so devastating. the levels of dread, existentialism, and pain have overwhelmed my personality many times before, and i realised at some point that i lost my hope. i was certain life ahead of me would be miserable for a lot of my childhood, and didn't think i'd make it to my current age. my birthday was just last week, and i'm happy to say it was a good one! every day, every win, every loss, every moment of fear or happiness is one that i can cherish now, because i didn't believe i had many moments left to experience.
i'm always seeking out community for exactly the reasons you described. support is the difference between joy and sorrow, and it's the reason i can enjoy my birthdays. it's so important to try and find community, to find people to share your life with. it's worth every single step it takes to get there
Thank you so much for sharing this! It's really brave of you to share this, and you've explained yourself so clearly and honestly, and I'm so glad to hear you're doing better and happier ❤ May the recovery go well, and may your hope come true, bit by bit 🙏
I am so glad for the progress you've made. Thank you for sharing yourself and your experiences with others
This is one of the most meaningful videos I've seen in a long time.
Thank you being brave enough to not only share what your physical
day to day looks like, but more importantly what goes on internally.
I have recently been under a lot of stress and almost lost myself.
I had nobody to talk to about it, no way to understand it was just
all a big blur of a tunnel I had to travel through hoping to get to
the light at the end. I even had someone I recently met ask me if I
was autistic because of the trauma I'd been through. While I don't
seriously believe that is the case, it just shows how quickly people
judge you harshly, it was also said to me in a sort of put down type way.
I've heard that being put under immense stress actually causes the
brain to shrink, and so if that's true then perhaps constant pressure
can lead to damage, damage that isn't so easily repaired in a short
space of time, which leads me to your point about the mind being
so overwhelmed it has no choice but to store this energy inside the body.
I was unable to even express positive emotion, even feelings for people.
Especially anything that would lead to being loved or feelings of safety.
I allowed people to use me and decide for themselves if I was worthy of
their time or not, and eventually this broke me down even worse.
Not only into a terrible feeling of "why" don't they like me, but
that I don't like anyone if this is how most people choose to operate.
A lot of the time people have their own responsabilites and goals
which is great, but not when it ends up hurting those around them.
There's so much social pressure especially with text communication,
that it was almost impossible for me to really continue pushing
to be in peoples lives, when it felt like there was no effort
being delivered on their end, most likely because they already
have everything they need from the people they already know,
and when they don't they'll try and get it from you, but when
you're in need, they're not there. This has been the case for me
all my life, all my life. Especially as a child, I would go knock
on my friends door who lived a 20 min walk away from me to be told
more than half of the time "busy can't come out". Just never really
being told the true feelings of someone is worse than them shying
away from them, and I still experience this today among new friends.
I wish people could communicate better and not just to make themselves
feel better. It's lead me to a life of solitude and more out of neccessity
than an actual need for it. To slow down and like you mention "to be in your body".
I really hope my message hasn't been a bore, or too long, or drawn out, but,
I felt obliged to let you know you're not alone, and there's a lot of people
out there that have been let down, hurt and mistreated by those who we thought
were dearest to us, who we thought had our best interests at heart but ended up
finding out that wasn't the case. People nowadays are cold and disconnected because
they are so busy connecting to social media, their whatsapp group or what daily tasks
they have to fulfill until they can "enjoy their day" all while operating on auto-pilot
in a hypnotised state unaware of the real nature of life around them.
I've always felt like an outsider among groups; simply because I'm not like everybody else.
People don't like that, it makes them feel envious that they aren't more unique in their own way.
People want to constantly tell you how they're right and how you're wrong or how you can do things better,
or how the way they do things is so much better for them, never remembering that it might not be best for you,
never stopping to just realise that life is about experiencing it.
I guess I say this because you probably have had a lot of people who simply "don't get it" and dealing with
depression and OCD, they think there's a way you can just "fix" it if you want to, which for me only makes it worse.
For me the best way to heal is to go inward and find the answers myself, people love to follow but we all need to
be our own leaders and I've only gotten halfway through you video and it's already clear as day that you're leading
your own path, not only in healing but in the way you wish to express your truest self and be present everyday.
Thank you so much for being willing to share this with the world. I know your example will help so many people all across the world.
I hope in time the perfect life you dream of becomes a reality and all obstacles flee your path before you.
Best wishes and joy
Thank you for your openness and courage.
I just subscribed recently because I found your videos not only educational but also cosy and relaxing. This is coming at the perfect time because I haven't been doing great lately. Thank you for sharing more of your personal life with us, what you went through resonates with many of us. Sending love❤
Your words are a comfort and your videos feel like a safe space. Thank you