THIS IS GONNA HURT
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 23. 08. 2024
- Time to get pierced and also open up about mental health, vulnerability and feeling low.
My Frying pan: bit.ly/3wn9Jt4
Air Frier Silicone mould: bit.ly/3OQoBqm
Tracksuit: bit.ly/3HSVaQF
Leather Jacket: www.zara.com/u...
Trainers: bit.ly/3OB8T29
Piercing place in Norwich: www.factotumbo...
My glasses: www.specsavers...
My Sunglasses: bit.ly/3PastSv
My baseball cap: sweethoneydew....
Big Necklace - Oliver Bonas in Store.
Gold Hoops: dreadfulpigeon...
Denim Puffer Coat: bit.ly/3NdlM1B
Striped Jumper: www.zara.com/u...
Red Headband: atwinstore.co....
Leopard Print Puffer Coat: bit.ly/3uATIzl (similar)
Links:
đ My Online Shop: www.sweethoney...
đ My Podcast: audioboom.com/...
đ Shop my Style: www.shopltk.co...
đœ Tiktok: / helenanderz
đž Instagram: www.instagram....
âïž Buisness Email: info@theanderzapproach.com
PO Box 3767
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NR7 7HU
Sometimes I use affiliate links, which mean I get a small commission when you purchase something through that link. It just helps me out a lot and means I can continue to do this full time.
Nothing like coming home from a long day at work, heat up some leftovers and watch Helen on youtube
and i can promise you, you are so valuable for alot of people.
I dont have alot of friends so having your monolog on in the backgrouns for example in my day to day life gives me company. It makes me think, laugh, reflect and it inspires me. And i think im not alone.
Your job is made for you
I love this comment! Can totally second this đâ€ïžâđ„
When people tell you what you do isnât a real job, itâs pure jealousy. I have a âreal jobâ working for the government and I still canât buy a home or live the lifestyle I want, (Iâm in the US) so what does a real job even mean? Your job has afforded you a nice lifestyle doing what you love and that makes people jealous, so they find a way to try and put you down. You keep doing whatever your heart wants miss Helen. â€
Anyone, no matter their circumstances, can go through down days, so never feel like you need to hide your low moments. You're human and you're allowed to feel all the emotions. Much love to you Helen â€ïž
Thank you so much for opening up about your feelings because over the last week or so, I too have been feeling proper wank and was really beating myself about it!! I had such a low start to last year, pretty much until May and I told myself I wouldnât allow it to happen again this year, but as you say - the bleak weather and the inability to pick yourself up in ways that you would like is so hard to navigate. Just trying to take note of the intrusive thoughts and then let them go and carry on doing what makes me as happy as possible đž keep being you, you wonderful ray of sunshine âïž
I hate the winter too, mood plummets to near rock bottom. You're not alone, you got this
Thanks for sharing your feelings and making those of us that go through similar periods feel more normal xx
Get a allotment or make a space in ur garden to grow veg and salad because I suffer with depression and it fluctuates but when I grow things in my house and then planting it out getting my hands dirty and seeing it grow up and I can eat it (bonus) gives me the drive to think it's just a passing motion and not lost. Just a personal thought
Loved your honesty - stop beating yourself up. You're in another league compared to other "influences" because you're so real! Everything isn't always awesome. Hope you feel better soon â€
i knowwwwwww xxxx
I too have felt incredibly down these past few weeks so you are definitely not alone. I related a lot to what you said about your self worth and your work. I work in film and Tv doing costume and a lot of people around me have the reaction of "wow that's so cool" and it feels like its become a personality trait, but what people don't see are the 14hrs days, fatigue, and the loneliness and lack of motivation that you experience when there isn't a lot of work around. Your videos help me do tasks that I find incredibly boring and makes me feel less alone! Keep going you are great!!
I GOT SO EXCITED when Dani was shown because of her pants! My husband and I went to Cardiff, Wales for our anniversary (we're from US) and I saw someone wearing those pants on the first day. Just walking down the street, I saw this woman and thought "oh those pants are the coolest thingI'vee seen an adult wear in the wild, she's so confident and cool!". And then, by some stroke of fate, I saw THE PANTS hanging up in a window! I thought about them the whole time we were there (5 days) until the last day we were there, we finally popped into the shop and I brought them home with me. Unfortunately, this shop doesn't have a US location, so when people ask me where I got them, I sound so cool saying, "Oh, I got them on vacation in Wales." Obviously, you can get them online... so I do tell people that, but it still makes me feel cool.
Thanks for coming to my TEDtalk.
In the end, maybe the takeaway from this comment should be less about the pants and more about how much that random woman influenced me just by wearing something and walking confidently down the street. Because of her I found a small bit of confidence within myself, which first had to do with the pants but ultimately ended up being me. I found a bit of myself. Thank you for sharing your life with us. You just never know when/how you're going to inspire a stranger. And I hope by doing so, you find a bit of you đ€đ€đ€
Helen you give to others by creating content. Thatâs not nothing. You make others feel less alone, even when you are unhappy you make a mahoosive difference. By being bloody honest. I think thatâs fabulous. You are more than ok to feel this way itâs bloody normal, itâs your right. Youâre working life is very different to non artistic peoples I think it must be extremely tough. You are helping by normalising melancholy. So we all feel less alone with our shite self destructive thoughts. You work hard and would never suggest an actor or an artist, musician do nothing of value. They provide delight and that feeling that we are not alone, happy, sad, mediocre. All the highs and the lows and in between. Shared human experiences. I also bet when they also have a lull in work or creative work and flow they experience low mood. Or if people say shit things that trigger. đźIn fact I bet in all art forms the highs and lows will be up and down like a brides nightie and somehow more intense. Look after yourself H as you are only a human in very unique circs xxx
That last shot of you, oh my gosh you looked beautiful! New piercings look sick đ€. You will always be my fave on this platform, keeping it real and just super open about normal feelings, we all get, is just so refreshing. Like you said, the more we all talk about these things, we realise we arenât alone at all! Thank you for being SUCH A LEGEND. Lots of love x
Hello Helen .... I struggle with similar issues you describe. So I find it it interesting to listen to someone who shares how they deal with this. Gives me new thoughts and I can think about how I maybe deal with my things better. It's always great to talk to friends and family, but they often cannot relate to my thoughts and feelings. Thank you for sharing - you do have a purpose . And I am not the only one who thinks that you sharing your life and thoughts is helpful.
im glad you can find some comfort on my channel xxx
Thank you for sharing all that. I've feel like that often. Your right is hard to be a high discloser but it's so worth it to get it out. You're relateable and your funny and your real and we love watching coz of all of that xxxx
This was so good for me to hear right now. My husband has been feeling this way for some time (and also has adhd) and I could understand more of how he's feeling through this. He stays inside his head and doesn't find it easy to share how he feels, but this really helped...I kind of want him to watch it too and realize he's not alone. So many can relate. And pushing yourself to do things that are good for your sould during these times is good for you. Thanks for sharing. Here's to brighter days ahead....
For what itâs worth Helen, Iâve felt that youâve still been exciting to watch this year. Even the lulls or lows you film/present are low-key and comforting to view. Give yourself grace when you can. We see you working hard. xx
thank youuuu xxx
Thank you so much for sharing how youâre actually feeling! I feel the EXACT same. Iâm usually so enthusiastic and love life, itâs been so hard not feeling like that. Not feeling the joy in things I usually feel joy in, the negative criticising thoughts and comparing things to last year (which was amazing) but youâre right, it will pass! Itâs so normal. Hope youâre ok xx
Try not to worry about things / people you cannot control , you are talented and amazing! Simple :)
Helen, I've been watching your videos since the start of your career. I just wanted to let you know, you have taught me 'slow is calm,' and I think about this every day when I'm rushing around or feeling manic. I also have ADHD and autism. You are a huge inspiration to me, and you're the only real CZcamsr I've constantly watched for years. I hope your mental health improves; I think you're very brave for talking about it so openly online. You really help others who are suffering not to feel so alone. Thanks, Helen â€ïž
Ah thank you and you're welcome! xxx
Love you so much Helen, been watching for so so many years because i see myself in you. Thereâs so much value in who you are. I applaud you for talking about how you feel on your platform đ
Helen, thank you for opening up and sharing your down days. It reassures us all that we have those times in our lives where we donât feel our best and have some negative thoughts. It lets us know that we arenât alone.
Your livelihood is so important to sooo many people. Before I started watching you my mental health and anxiety were so bad that I wouldnt leave the house and I truely lost myself. You have helped me gain my confidence, live a healthy, balanced lifestyle and most importantly youâve helped me find myself again! I really appreciate the way you open up and donât put on an act every time you film. You being yourself gives me (and Iâm sure everyone else) a sense of comfort and itâs so refreshing.
It may not be your typical job but itâs fking awesome!!
nawwwh. thank you xxxx
Thank you so much for this video. Thank you for normalizing having ups and downs and being honest about it. I feel very often exactly how you described it and although being self-conscious about it, I canât help but getting sucked into that downward spiral many times.
I felt like you were talking to me in this video and it felt like a hug in my soul. I have been following you for many years and absolutely love you and your videos.
Thank you Helen â€
awwh you're welcome! xxx
Thank you so much for opening up
awhhhhh aagh thanks! xxxx
You're an inspiration to me!, the changes I've seen you make to lead a happier, healthier life has really inspired me to carry on when i feel that same fog. Thank you for being you â€
we got this! xxx
Idk if youâll read this or not, but itâs ok to be human Helen and feel your feelings. Your job and what your hard work has created for you, your life, doesnât negate your down days or patches.â€
Did anybody else get jump scared by the music at the end??? Jesus, I nearly hit the ceiling!đ Youâre awesome Helen, and definitely not alone. I always enjoy your videos! Much love xxxxxx
Can I just say I bloody love your videos and your creativity always shines through in them đ«¶
Dear Helen I religiously watch your videos since a long time. I relate so often with the things you are saying. One thing that helps me lately to get over periods of self doubt is to think about all the things I have reached so far. That makes me proud and forces me to believe in myself. You are so talented, creative and unique never forget that! Much love from germany â€â€â€
Awh thank you! Xx
Thank you for not hiding who you are and what you feel! Hope you feel better soon đ
Thanks for sharing Helen †I think feeling guilty for feeling bad even though you have a good life is very relatable and understandable, for me anyway đ
Helen, darling â€ïž You are amazing human being, very sweet and genuine!
It is fine to feel down sometimes! And you are not alone, do what feels right for you and donât care about so-called productivity that is being forced by social media â€ïž
Love watching your videos, itâs crazy that it is almost 10 years that I am watching your videos
So this will sound hella corny, but when you feel low and feel like you dont have anything to show from your job... please remember this... you do, your videos bring joy , they bring comfort and make people feel seen. You keep doing it even when you cant physically see the results because your viewers are all over the place (be a bit mental if we all showed up to yours so you could see our reactions đ ) but we are here and we are thankful for you! Personally iv been going through alot so much so that i feel like the universe has it out for me and my family but your videos have been my escape and im very thankful that this is your job đâ€ïž
Also fuck the haters they are just a bunch of fuds đ
Thank you for making videos when youâre not feeling your best. I just want to let you know your videos been helping me through a really hard time in my life and whether theyâre 30 minutes 40 minutes although I wish they were over an hour they give me some peace and a really fantastic distraction. Also, donât underestimate the moon cycle. It was just wreaking havoc in Aquarius. Also do you get your period on a full moon? Go easy on yourself love xx
You absolutely have a real job and your work is very valuable to alot of people. â€
I can relate to this. I haven't been able to articulate how I have been feeling. Even in therapy I feel like I am going through that "not good enough" you are a wonderful person and your experiences are valid. Slow and steady wins the race my dear. â€
its hard sometimes isnt it haha xx
Its the society thats sick. You do you. All of you. â€
Not trying to diagnose cause I'm not a health professional! When I go through those kind of feelings my vitamin D levels are really low! Maybe a vitamin level check would be good? It is very common this time for year, but I also struggle absorbing genetically! Just a thought đ â€
oh deffo lack of vitamin D is a contributing factor. xxx
Found you from a silver hair tutorial and we ended up chatting loads. Turns out we both have adhd đ your content has helped me in many ways over the years â€
âOmg I love pyjamasâ couldnât relate any more to you right now đ
Didnât see anyone else mentioning this and I mean it in the best way possible. Iâm an ADHD girlie too and in your last video you mentioned your meds being off. I had the same last year and went to my psychiatrist to check it out and change up meds and dosage and felt 1000 times better. Theyâre not the answer to everything and maybe you want to go off them completely, but maybe looking into it could help? Sending â„ïž!
Remember who you are. You seem to always become whoever youâre in a relationship. Be confident in your own taste and your own interests! Even your voice changes
Example?
I recall that you always feel like this at the beginning of the year. Some of us appreciate and value you more than you think. Lots of love.
Time of year hey! Xx
thank you for sharing
I appreciate it and I can relate hugely in the last two weeks
look after yourself itâs rough out there in the mind sometimes x
ooooh yesssss xxx
Thanks for the car chat. I feel so similar to you in terms of getting my worth from my productivity and what Iâve achieved. Iâve just been made redundant so itâs made me hit the thoughts of self worth etc head on. When Iâm feeling a bit overwhelmed and questioning my path I flip it to being proud of everything I have achieved and remind myself that weâre all floating on a rock in space and life doesnât have to be that serious haha! đ xx
The way that you ended this video made me quite emotional. It was as if we were seeing you just as the clouds had parted. All of us people really are just trying to do our best and live how we want to, and just because your job is more âuniqueâ than others doesnât make your struggles any less real than anyone elseâs. It doesnât rain above the clouds, thank you Helen for being sunshine for all of us. Hopefully we give a little back to you too when you need it â€
Haha I didnât even think of it like that, thatâs such an nice observation đ„°
That's one of the worst lies culture/media has infused in us. The idea that a wellness journey is a linear leveling up. Recognizing you're in a low mood and where it is coming from and what to do about it is such a great step too. We can know we are doing the things and resting etc but it still fucking sucks. Sitting in the discomfort instead of trying to distract is hard and exhausting and we are allowed to be pissy about it đ I really appreciate your adhd content, helps myself navigate it too.
Those last words of wisdom... Thank you âšđ»ps: cause of YOU we all are here and we come back. Also DD and Lola đ€đŸđŸ
I feel like youâre in your prime Helen. Always look forward to these videos whatever the subject may be. So real and down to earth, youâre the only CZcamsr I watch videos on repeat. âźïž â€
Thank you! Xxx
something a therapist once told me, just a thought for you and others ...step out of yourself and like imagine if you will that you were a kid, young adult whatever age and that person came to you for advice ...so like you were a younger Helen what would you tell her if she was in your shoes? what encouragement? what kindness would you offer?...you would never be rude, hateful or whatnot ...so why are you like that to yourself? allow (give) yourself the chance to be down and out, you can feel your feelings (don't be your feelings. move forward, rock out to tunes, run or walk, whatever works for you. cleaning.) but don't let them overtake you. there are no folks like you out there, so why the heck are you judging yourself to their standards? how they live? they are doing this or that in your life? wearing what they wear? hair or whatever in that spot like them? why? don't do it. stop. be kind to yourself, to others and to all folks. keep your head up and keep on walking. i am 45, Helen and what i love about you is don't give a darn (or you appear to do that, i have friends who tell me the same? i am like what the heck, really? i think it is okay to act it. whatever you want, how you wish to be looked as having that trait, even at the moment you don't have it. act how you wanna and keep trying) about this and that. people are gonna love if you act like your true self. why the hell be some1 else????!!!! and if they don't like you so be it, their loss. move on. you're awesome Helen and we love ya for you. happy or sad. whatever ... all in our different ages (stages) of life, different steps but what can we do for each other sympathize, be more companionate and give folks the grace to fail over and over again. judgement needs to take a hike asap! ( :
Iâm going through the peri menopause and itâs really hard. I can see what mood Iâm in but I canât change it. Itâs horrible and today I cried in my roll top bath and I laughed as Iâm so lucky to be in a roll top bath - but itâs a horrible feeling
Oh gosh sending love xxx
Love watching your videos I find them & you inspiring. Can relate to ups & downs & walking in nature helps.
Babe making money doesnât have to be hard. Thatâs a belief so many of us have to reprogram. Being a content creator has been a real job for more than a decade now - Iâve been watching your stuff for nearly a decade and found happiness, inspiration and entertainment in your content. Plus if it helps I have always admired your work ethic and I see you as SO productive and almost feel bad I donât keep up with as many chores and errands as you share online. But yeah being self employed is hard. I hope you read this. Xx
If your job isnât worthwhile then being a musician, actor or any other creative is a waste too and that would equal a terrible world.
Why do certain CZcamsrs feed your soul? Lol sounds weird but itâs just so refreshing to consume content that you relate to on another level.đ
As someone from Edinburgh, your Scottish accent is better than most I hear in films đ đ€đ€đ€đ€đ€đ€
Haha yes!!
My dear Helen, please remember depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain that cannot be fixed by success or money. Your feelings and emotions are completely valid; regardless of your job title. Speaking about it is the best thing to beat the stigma. You got this â€ïž
Be careful with fryalight in your new pan!! Fryalight ruins non stick, I've stopped using it in my pans and airfryer now!
I do wonder if they people that say those things about your work are envious that theyâre not âinsert your great traits areâ⊠like theyâd never be enough to do what youâre doing and make it a success. People canât understand because they donât do it, but they donât try to learn or accept your efforts. I hope that makes some sense.
yeah i get it... and thank you! xx
Girl, I follow your journey for a really long time now and, of course I don't know you - I'm not delulu like that, but what I saw in the last years was a woman who worked her ass off. Remember: it pays your bills, you can live off of what you do - of course it's real work! Nobody would say a freelance Web designer doesn't do "real work" ... whatever that means. And on productivity, I got the same problem, but my therapist once said: Even a baby that didn't contribute anything to the world yet has worth - so why shouldn't you?
You're worth so, so, so much. If you're productive or not. It's always the good people who are too critical with themselves! â€
Mental health issues donât discriminate! Donât feel like youâre not allowed to feel like shit or have bad days just because youâre privileged. Sharing your feelings will reach the people who need to hear it and know theyâre not alone â€
thank you, that means alot xxx
BUY THE LION KING PYJAMA'S!!!!!
Helen I love your style and you have cool hair and glasses đ
weee thanks! xxx
You are beautiful and talented, Helen!
Loved this â€
Well Helenâs made me want to get another piercing đđđđâ€ïž
hahaaa sorry! xx
You only see a rainbow when there's been some rain x
yep!! xxxx
Just what I need to watch on a Tuesday morning with a cuppa in bed â€
They are balloon bouquets đđđ
Sharing how youâre feeling just shows you are human⊠donât feel you canât share these things just because youâre putting content on the internet. Iâve also been feeling down recently, I also feel like a have no friends either which sucks as thereâs then no one outside of my family to talk to⊠I love whitlingham lake, but Iâve not taken my lab pup there for a walk yet (sheâd love it!) I started the new year thinking Iâd join a gym just to make friends and have a social life, but that didnât happen⊠I also got a pup so I could get out more, but I find Iâm just doing the same walks around my village which is getting abit boring now, need to find some friends with dogs! đ anyway Iâm ranting, but feel like Iâm having a conversation based on your video đ
join a local group on facebook! there's loads especially for ladies finding new friends or doing dog walks :) xxx
@@helenanderzI hadnât thought of that⊠will definitely look into something like this for when my youngest starts school in September as I get so much anxiety taking him out with me because heâs a hyperactive child I feel I canât control đ, much like his older brother whoâs been waiting for an ADHD assessment for the last 3 years⊠sometimes feel like both me and my husband have undiagnosed ADHD too, I can relate to so much when you talk about your ADHD (thankyou for sharing this too). Might have to get in contact with ADHD norfolk, as the nhs will take forever as Iâve experienced so far with my eldest child!
YOUâRE ALLOWED TO FEEL YOUR FEELINGS.
YESSSSS đâ€ïž
â€â€â€
Hey, you worked hard to build up a community and channel that youâre able to âlive offâ and make enough money off⊠if it was easy everyone would do it! Never short change yourself or listen to the haters in your life. Misery loves companyâŠ
thank you xx
Anything that makes you money is a job!
Yep! X
When it comes to ray bans, I've noticed that many people on CZcams/Instagram/Tik Tok are into round and/or irregular shaped pairs these days, but not aviators, wayfarers or clubmasters. Does that mean I can't wear aviators, wayfarers or clubmasters? Just asking for advice
Wear what makes u smile and happy
Im getting the club masters i love them just waiting for that overtime wage to come through đđ»
It may not be depression! Go get your hormone levels and your thyroid checked. Also add more Vitamin D along with a multi vitamin. This time of year the weather and your body goes through a slump. Take care! â€
my hormones are a little bit naughty, but this feels out of place xxx
We with "real jobs" need and want entertainment, I mean writers, painters, musicians (and they mostly unhappy..)etc. all count as important roles in todays society. Perhaps they were also seen as lazy or whatever a couple 100 years ago. Perhaps it will be the same with content creation in the future when AI can generate pics and videos in a few seconds, then this will be a "hand craft" đ
That is true I suppose! Xxxx
It's funny, before I watched your todays video, I watched this channel: The mother and daughter diaries, "This changed my life ... video. Maybe, you like to have a look at it. I think, it hits the spot on your toppic. Hope you feel better soon. Have a great day â€
oh interesting! xxx
How many people are feeling exactly the same? It's gotta be that time of year. Lol I'm all gloom and doom! I lost my job because a new manager came in and said I wasn't aloud to work from home anymore. Even though I was getting all the jobs done. (I worked from home to look after my new baby) I kicked ass at that job. I was forced to leave because the girl that worked with me was jealous of the fact I got to work from home. (This girl didn't do any work, she would just moan and slag off all the colleagues) I am now on UC looking after my boy, trying to get on the social housing list so I can afford to live lol. And I'm here thinking what the fuck can I do? How the fuck can I improve my life. Not only for my boy but for my mental health. I get so frustrated with myself at the fact that I don't know what to do. My brain is yelling at me "YOU'RE A FAILURE" lol man life is hard and they don't teach you this in school. Nobody gets you ready for the real world. You are on your own and when you get help from people they just use it against you. It's so draining. I am so tired.
Im sending tou all the love. Must be really tough right now, but you'll pull through and look back on this time and be proud of yourself xxxx
@@helenanderz hell yeah!! Lol feel like a fucking seesaw with these emotions. Thanks Hun â€ïž
Can anyone else not hear sound? đ€đą
I can hear xx
Mine is okay also, sometimes I need to completely close down the CZcams app and re-open for stuff to have audio. đ
darling helen, i beg of thee, you are doing E V E R Y T H I N G on your own. you are fucking B R I L L I A N T. fuck what anyone thinks. itâs people that are so brainwashed to think you have to work yourself to the bone to be worthy anything at all and itâs still not good enough. we are the generation that HAS TO stop the toxic traits that our elders were tought. that being a main one.
as the great coco chanel once said: âi donât care what you think of me. i donât think about you at all.â
đ€đ§Ąđ
Thank you for not hiding who you are and what you feel! Hope you feel better soon đ
I shalt never hide xx