How to Be a Foster Parent: Exploring Different Options
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- čas přidán 8. 10. 2023
- Hi there! In today's video, I share with you all of the various ways you can make foster parenting work, even if you've got a full-time job or a busy schedule. We'll be exploring different avenues of foster care, like respite care, traditional foster care, emergency care, and providing permanency (like guardianship or adoption).
Throughout this video, you'll get to join me on some phone conversations as I connect with potential foster placements, prep for visits, and offer support to a child named Taylor during their stay. (Enjoy the roleplay!)
I want this video to inspire you to consider becoming a foster parent and show you just how adaptable these options can be. Don't forget to drop any questions you might have in the comments, and a huge thank you for hanging out with me today!
Looking for more? I offer 1:1 DM support (plus checklists and templates) on Patreon for as little as $1. / fosterparenting
Find Me on Social Media:
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Facebook: / foster.parent.partner
#fostercare #fosterparenting #fosterparent
1:52 it broke my heart to imagine a little kid curled up in a blanket at a stranger's place after a traumatic event 😣 thank you to all the foster parents and case workers doing their best to provide them safety and comfort
On the good side, that might be the start to a drastic improvement in the child's life, if their parents either take the wake-up call and change, or else lose custody and the kid goes to an adoptive home.
Hi Laura I am not a foster parent but am verry interested in that process and your videos relay all the important information in a way that is easy to understand and thank you for showing the different roles you can have to support children in the foster care system
Thank you for watching and considering!
I like the way you broke this down. I think respite care would be the best for me. I like that it can be planned ahead of time and is a temporary situation. My son is a junior in HS but I would like to do this after he goes to college. I’ve been following you for a couple of years anticipating that I will do this one day. Thanks for showing the different ways to help.
Thank you for watching and being open to respite care. There is such a need and it can really help so many families.
My fiancée and I have been thinking about fostering in the future but we both work full time and I didn’t know there was any other way to do it than the traditional fostering. Respite care sounds perfect for us, it’ll be a few years til we can, but we’d like to. I worry about being denied because we’re both women though. I’ve heard that can be a problem.
@@nebula5189even here in Texas, I’ve seen CPS cases where children were fostered then adopted by same-sex parents - you should definitely look into it ❤ (I’m not a professional in that field, I just watch CPS cases on YT, so I’m sure there are many more here than the two I’ve seen)
@nebula@@nebula5189 idk where you live so this might not be the case but I think female fosters are good for teen girls who have experienced SA from a man. I remember watching a single woman foster parent on youtube explaining that she is specifically given those types of cases because there's no man in the house.
As a single foster mom who works full time I
I'm not a foster parent, but I am a CASA working on my first case. Love your content. Keep us the good work.
Thank you for signing up to be a CASA 💛
These services are desperately needed. Anyone who is considering helping out, be aware that sometimes the information you get up front is not correct. I provided what was supposed to be a three day respite stay for a teen. It turned into a two week stay. (They said respite but it was really more of an emergency placement situation although it took some time to realize this). I was told that she went to a school in my district. Turns out the paperwork was two years old and I ended up driving her 30 minutes each way to school. My advise is to expect nothing. Flexibility is a must if you are going to work with the system. The kids I have hosted have been fine but the foster care system is nuts!
Thank you for showing the different aspects of the foster process. I truly wish all locations had the same level of support you show in your videos. I also wish all foster homes are as wonderful as you. We’d have a lot less kids traumatized by the foster process.
I had a friend whose daughter was taken into foster care for a short time. It was a sad situation all around, because the mom had just gotten out of an abusive relationship. Some things happened where she was temporarily taken while Mom was assessed.
Anyway, the daughter had to spend the night in the CPS offices. It would have been so much less traumatic if there had been an emergency care home. The daughter still has nightmares about that whole experience.
It's devastating that kids are spending the night in offices, hotels, and sometimes even jail cells. I am so very sorry for your friend and their family.
It's incredibly frustrating that the sleeping in the office situation is happening so much here in Texas (not that that's necessarily where you are - there are people watching these videos from all over the world, let alone the country - simply that I know it's an ongoing problem here). Those of us who aren't necessarily in a position to provide care can still do one huge thing so long as we are eligible: VOTE.
My state presently is run by people who don't give a s*** about children except as political pawns, and it hurts to watch. At times, they even have used the foster care system directly for political purposes, ordering them to investigate well-established, physician supported care as abuse, as if the system weren't already loaded down dealing with families in actual, non-manufactured crisis. We must take every opportunity and every legit avenue we have to ensure kids are put first and have the best possible care.
Hi Laura
I’m a young teen who is looking to foster in the future and your channel has helped me see what is it like and what I need to be qualified to do this. ❤Thank you and keep up the hard work.
i’m not a foster parent yet, but it’s one of my passions and I can’t wait for the day i’m able to help kids in situations like I was. your channel is so helpful and insightful and I appreciate everything you do ❤️
Love the camera work in this one!
I've commented on several videos over the past several months. Back in April, I said I was taking two months to live alone before I started filling out the paperwork. At first it was hard to wait because I was chomping at the bit, then as the two months drew to an end, I realized I needed more time to work on myself and my house before I jumped in. After six months of living alone and a bunch of projects and some personal adjustments, I'm thinking I'm pretty close to ready, now. I actually filled out the application last week, but I haven't sent it yet. The list of things I think I should finish before becoming responsible for foster children has gotten very short--most of it could be done concurrently with the application process in order to have it completed before the licensing process finished. There's only one or two things that need to be done before I turn in the application, so... I think I'll be finally starting the process sometime this week or next! My current long-term substitute position and my degree will be both finished in December, and the average licensing process at the agency I plan to apply to is only three months. All of my time/energy intensive projects will be done a few weeks before I'd get my license, leaving me with plenty of free time, flexibility, and mental capacity to spend on children!
Thank you for having an open mind to fostering! I love how thoughtful you are with the entire process - a great quality for a foster parent :) Please keep me posted with how licensing goes!
I 💜 your post-
making sure that you are mentally and “domestically” prepared for fostering!
Update: I ended up applying in early December, finished all the training by January, and today was my first in-home interview. My second one is scheduled for next week, and if all goes well, my inspection should be the week after! Depending on how long the state takes after my homestudy is submitted, I'll be licensed sometime in March. I'm very excited. @@foster.parenting
I LOVE this! Hope to see more in this format! I feel like all of your content has such valuable information given in a style that really let's you picture it. Being able to see more in depth like this is so helpful!
I really appreciate the feedback!! I will be doing more like this :) Not all of them - because they are a lot more work haha - but I hope to do more! Ty for watching and being here!
Wow! Just wow. You are amazing in all that you do! This video is one of your greatest ones because it (like always) shows all the different team members who help in the care of a child, but also breaks down their specific roles which is great in helping people learn more and potentially pursuing one of those roles. The camera work is very professional and you've improved a lot at explaining things and portraying certain situations. I love following your channel from the start and I'm excited for more of this! Thanks again Laura :)
Thank you!! This one IS very different :) I started working with some people who are much better than me at making CZcams videos haha I want to be able to provide helpful educational videos, and I also know my limits when it comes to filming, editting, communication, CZcams standards, etc.. Not all of my videos will be like this, but I hope to do more and more. Thank you so much for the feedback and for watching!
@@foster.parentingThat's amazing that you branched out a bit to provide high quality education (although your other videos are great too), so glad you know your limits and are willing to work with others on this! I know all your viewers appreciate it! Take care
Thank you so much for sharing this! I've dreamed of being a foster parent or adopting since i was a kid. However, I work full time and have loans so i wasnt sure what was possible. Respite sounds like a great way to dip my toe in that fits my work requirements.
It also sounds like it might be a better fit for your financial situation. It seems like it might be a little easier to demonstrate one has sufficient resources to provide for a child or children for a short period, versus for an open-ended, ongoing placement.
My husband and I (both educators) have been thinking about fostering teenagers for a long time, but have always worried about woking full time.
I know someone that has a child that used to be in foster care. I won't get into details but the birth mom ended up choosing an open adoption. Now the used to be foster parents are the little girl's adoptive parents.
Thanks so much for making these videos and showing what to expect and normalizing the process for potential foster parents.
I love your content, been seeing your shorts for some time and I’m glad to stumble upon your longer form videos too. I am not a foster parent, and I’m no where near the point in my life where I can foster children. But it has been a dream of mine to foster and/or adopt older children and/or siblings when I am stable enough to do so. Thank you so much for your videos, new subscriber here.
I am not a foster parent nor I been in the foster care system. I was an abused child who went through court in my country. This videos are really validating and they give me much hope
Sorry for the pain you have lived through but encouraged that you are finding support and maybe a bit of healing through these videos.
I love your channel is so well put together, your videos are so informative as well. Thank you for your knowledge!
I’ve always wanted to foster temporarily so I can help teens with a hard life feel appreciated and that they deserve safety and unconditional love.
I'm sixteen and I already think I wanna foster when I am old enough and have the financial stability. ❤
I could NEVER be a foster parent. But I could bring food to one if I knew one.
Search for your local foster closet! :) I also have a list on my site: www.fosterparentpartner.com/support-for-foster-parents
I'm only 14, so this obviously something i'm not in all involved with, but I am genuinely curious about all this type of stuff, plusss I find your videos very comforting and a bit inner-child healing if that makes sense? I'm planning to study psychology and then get into child psychology, so I find your videos intriguing and helpful. Thank you!!!
Hi i love your channel, i know you probably wont see this but i wondered if you have ever given a child one of the "Wreck this Journal" by Keri smith... she also writes books like "Pocket Scavenger and "F-nish T-is J--rnal"....my niece is unfortunately going through the foster care system while my sister tries to get off drugs. I always pray at night she finds someone like you. And i think she finally might have. She has been bragging about these journals and from what ive seen it gets kids outside searching for the "best rock" or leaf and has a lot of interesting activities. Its not just a journal its an activity book that helps kids express rage and sadness and happiness and seems to have changed my niece's world. She is 7 by the way and she has like 9 of these n other similar books by Keri Smith. Idk if youll see this but it might be an interesting try! I know my nieces foster mom said it helped break down alot of walls. My niece was self harming and isolating so this was fantastic. I hope you see this love your channel and calm advice ❤
Thank you for this. I really appreciate the clarity here.
Wonderful video Laura! I so appreciate the time you give to make these videos to educate people. You’re awesome Laura! 🩷
Ty for watching!!
Great overview, thank you for providing this information!
Laura, how is it with being able to hug and hold foster kids? I've not raised my own children, but have been a pseudo-auntie with friends kids, involved in a deep way. I also was a caregiver (nanny, sort of) for many years. In those relationships, I could be as physical as a parent with babies, toddlers, and little kids and any kid who wanted it and I knew them (but the parents knew me). The boundaries of foster parents are likely different. I'm sure emergency foster care is different from a longer term foster. Are there rules? If any place I'd get it wrong, I'd think it'd be there.
Thank you for making these videos!!
what an incredible video to show how you can help at any level!
ty for watching!
Thank you Laura!!!😊
My heart cannot wait to be a foster mom. ❤thanks for this video
I'm currently a teenager but I'm looking forward to fostering and eventually adopting. I've grown up in a abusive household, would I still be allowed to foster and adopt ? This video was very helpful. Love this channel so much and keep up the good work!
As long as you have the physical, mental, and emotional capacities to care for these children who are in crisis, then there's no reason why you can't foster and/or adopt! The main thing is to focus on your needs and be able to recognize the signs of burnout so that your past trauma does not intrude into your foster role. As a teenager also from an abusive household, it usually doesn't get better, but *you* do. You can change and improve yourself so that the abuse affects you minimally, and if you work hard enough you'll be able to one day leave that abusive household. Praying for you
Thank you ❤❤
It's absolutely possible to break the cycle of abuse. Look up Tori Phantom - they were a teen mom fresh out of an abusive household and they did great.
Of course it's easier to do with therapy and distance from that household - because children need so much care, and after abuse *you* need some care and self-care and I imagine it's really hard to balance both at the same time. So if you're making a choice about when/if to have (foster) children, I recommend "putting on your own oxygen mask before helping others". Making sure you get to start healing from what you experienced before you go for having kids. Therapy or peer support groups can help, as does time spent away from people who hurt you. You'll get there ❤
Some really wonderful parents and foster parents might have had trauma or abuse in their own past and gained coping skills, compassion, and resilience. That isn't automatic and takes some excellent self-care, with support in place, knowing your triggers and limits. Honoring other people's needs and boundaries can never be achieved by exceeding your own. Trying limited care provision like babysitting or afterschool work with Boys and Girls Club to see how that feels first and what it brings up might be a good first step. You will get as far as you want to go in your life and healing if you are gentle with yourself and see what works out well and what feels like the best fit.
Thank you so much laura this helps so much
That was very helpful. I can see myself offering respite care one day.
Hi Laura, I am not a foster parent but have a question- I was wondering what “hoops” (for lack of a better word) someone with a physical disability would have to jump through in order to be a foster parent? Is it even possible, legally practically, would someone with a physical disability be allowed to be a foster parent?
Also, if you have the information, could you do a video on fostering a child with a physical disability, please?
Thanks
Well done, Laura. 🎉
Hi!!! Do you do any coaching or q&a zoom sessions for people who are considering foster care? Your videos are so helpful!!
I’m interested in providing respite care. Thanks so much for this channel.
Laura, you’re an angel on earth ❤
Thank you for making this video, it was very helpful :]]
Great content - thank you!
This was a great video. I cannot currently participate but it's still good to know what the different options are.
Ty for watching and considering!
There's so much that has to be accomplished under CA state laws for a resource parent home to be compliant, i.e., adhere to laws that apply to group homes. I've prepared the kitchen fire extinguisher, the emergency ladder, and locked storage for medications, but I have yet to repair small window screen tears and figure out how to secure dozens of scissors in the house without making daily life impossible, not to mention getting a mechanic to approve my elderly vehicle's checklist. These are just examples; there's so much to prepare. I'm glad to hear there are ways to help at shorter intervals, but the general setup requirements are very stringent and time-consuming to accomplish. Any insights?
Laura, thank you so much for taking time out of your schedule to make these very insightful videos for us to watch! I am working on becoming a mentor for kiddos in Foster Care with the hopes to someday adopt as well. Do you have any input on how to navigate adopting children out of the Foster Care system while you have children of your own? Thanks a million.
I didn't even know there were different options!
Great video
Thank you for this. I really want to do respite, but I have to wait until I can afford a home with an extra bedroom.
Thank you for being open to fostering in the future!
@@foster.parenting I wanted to do it forever but I've never been able to have a big enough apartment. I find all of your videos very informative. I'm watching all the way from Ontario Canada!
I have 4 placed with me as a family emergency placement. There have been some struggles. My husband and I already have 6 kids. We now have custody.
I have wanted to foster for many years and am now in a stable relationship and permanent home (i was in a not so great relationship and moved often when i was with my ex husband). Thing is i worry about how I'd feel when the child moves to a permanent home, I would wonder if they are being cared for and loved. Also, i get very emotionally attached. Is that something that I'd get past over time or is it a reason not to foster? I love your content!
Hi laura im a young teen but when im older im thinking about either adopting or fostering
I wish my spouse and I had the resources to participate, but it just isn't possible with our schedules. :/
How does the process of adopting from foster care work? What does the process look like? Would I have to foster a certain number of kids before adopting? Do you have a say in what age group you get to adopt? I’m not sure what age I’m interested in adopting yet but I know I want to adopt from foster care? Does the process look any different for same sex couples? I’m in Indiana BTW.
Different shirts for the different characters would be helpful. I kept being like "oh this is supposed to be the case worker" "oh now this is another foster parent" "oh now it's the prospective adoptive parent, wait no actually this is the case worker again"
I think the glasses were our cue that the character was the case worker
Could you help out foster parents you're friends with for a weekend respite or spontaneous daycare and babysitting or do you have to be approved by social services as respite fosters first?
I could imagine myself supporting one foster family occasionally. I don't see myself as any sort of parent, but I could imagine being a "foster auntie".
I always recommend getting a full license if you are able, if you want to do respite or babysitting. While this isn't required for all agencies/counties, it is becoming more and more common that it is. Plus, the background trauma informed parenting education is really important, even when providing short term care. Also having the first aid/CPR training is super important for safety.
i have been interested in fostering for a long time. Im a mental health clinician, work from home and my youngear child is 7. my house is the issue, its small and needs alot of repairs and im not sure if our home would be approved. we need direction on what has to be done so we cab prioritize
How many kids have you fostered?
Hi Laura I am only 18 but in the future I would love to be a foster parent but i also have a passion for teaching can I still foster even though I want to teach as well
yes! many teachers are also foster parents. And some teachers foster the kids they have taught. 💛
@@foster.parenting thank you
@@foster.parentingI was a high school teacher too and when my three kids were still at home my daughter used to often encourage me to foster, especially after they left home. But I’ve never done it bc as a single mom I thought I wouldn’t be approved for a license. Do you think I have a chance? I have a sheep farm in rural western Washington now, and two extra bedrooms…
My parents have adopted 5 children from foster care.
What is the most foster kids you’ve had at a time?
If a foster parent supplies drugs and alcohol to foster child but only proof is through social media can anything be done to investigate cause its very concerning and dont know how to help the child .
How to become a foster child without; losing your parents
mean it like a compliment girl i thought you were one of us (saphhics) 😭
LexEven if you work full-time and still be able to