Elon Musk's Brain Implant Company, Biden's Poll Numbers: Late Night's News of the Week
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- čas přidán 9. 11. 2023
- All the news and jokes you missed from the week of November 6.
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Elon Musk's Brain Implant Company, Biden's Poll Numbers: Late Night's News of the Week - Late Night with Seth Meyers
• Elon Musk's Brain Impl...
Late Night with Seth Meyers
/ latenightseth
Bays shouting “WHAT?!” offscreen was the funniest thing this week. 👏🏼
Agreed.
To avoid ornery ornithologists
just call them bird-people
I don’t think that’ll work with entomologists tho they get bugged easily
There are multiple ornithologists in my neighbourhood and i call them all 'Bird-watchers' to their face. Asking them if they caught something as if a picture is a capture. none of them are offended. Than again it might take a certain type of bird-watcher in a certain type of culture/nurture to create a simple bird-watcher to grow a fragile, enlarged Ego to get offended by the terminology. Over here ornithologists just watch birds..
BAIZE!
This joke made my day.
Brilliant. Post of the week for me 😂😂😂😂
Did you purposefully avoid using "ruffled feathers" as a metaphor to make a stand against outdated sayings?
Seth is truly adorable
2:37 Audible "whaat?" is hilarious.
DON'T underestimate those coffee tables. I have a scar from the 90's.
I realize there's going to be a long line in front of me, but I would LOVE to have an MMA match with Zuckerberg.
So does my son.
I’m positive that paper was his favorite snake poem.
"The guy who thinks oregano is a sin." 😂😂😂😂
Love Seth cracking up or messing up while saying the jokes *lolol*.
In my opinion, people in court laughed too when Trump said his club was worth 1B$ or more 😬
I think the best measure of a comedian isn't when their jokes land, but rather how they react when a joke bombs or they mess up the delivery. Although to be fair, I'm pretty sure one of his writers only included that bit about the American Bird People Society to set him up after last week's Corrections.
@@kieranhair37 true. I prefer Seth because it s never neat and clean… he messes up, reacts to whatever happens around, comments on jokes falling flat or unexpectedly landing… feels like the others are more “clean” in their delivery.
Could use less about Taylor swift no one gaf.
Mar-A-Lago is worth the same as the Burj Khalifa?!? 😂😂😂😂
(also, guessing that the "paper" he had was a back-dated, self-written pardon)
I have to say that Seth's Trump voice gets more accurate with every show. 😂
i do a poor imitation of seth doing trump.
it always gets a laugh and if doesnt i go to my santos material which i made up just like...
@@johndolan5076 My Trump just sounds like a crappy Johnny Carson, but I'm 36, so no one knows who he is.
😪
🏌🏻♂️
I'm waiting for the day a brain transplant will turn you into Trump and then won't everyone fall about laughing when you do your Seth Myers impersonation.
I suggest Elon be the first brain transplant to prove it works!
Doesn't being "unwoke" mean you're asleep?
Well done SAG ✊☮️
Loved the Patrick Dempsey joke 😂🎉
I wonder if you went out for a drink with Seth's writers and asked a general question about anything, would they disappear into a huddle for 30 minutes before answering??
Technically they are renaming all birds named after people, not just birds named after the problematic ones
Taco Bell is relatively expensive. Sometimes, people crave Taco Bell food, but more often than not, there are few options very late/early when people are hungry, drunk, or high.
If we could get an added commentary version of News of the Week, it could be as solid as Corrections.
I like that Ivanka is wearing a window curtain in the pic
Missed this. Best in the biz!
Musk should be the first volunteer .. since he doesn't have one
Then where would he implant it?
@@kissit012 the best place is what he sits on ... since that is where most his thoughts come from
😂 delightfully funny, that's you, Seth! Thank you.
The pure fact you can hear Baez say "what" like he was straddled is awesome
As opposed to cloudy facts 😜
@@whocares9033 way to go out of your way to find a compliment to a show whose only goal is to be funny and share news in a satirical manner well done you exposed yourself moving on
Absolutely hilarious!!
Haha. I hope he is paying taxes at that amount 😂
I’m a new viewer and I ❤ corrections!!!
I ❤when you make yourself laugh. ~J
Welcome baby jackal x 🐾 😊
The "bird people" are coming for you, Seth!
Elon Musk's Brain Implant ? It is a very high bar, but we have a new "worst idea ever". Trump now selling happy endings in a West Palm alley for $4.
I volunteer. Obviously for the brain removal. I can’t get rid of bad memories, also I have brain damage and can’t remember new things and I can’t smell anything anymore. So it doesn’t sound that bad.
Happy ending for 4 bucks! That could mean so many things! The worst of which is getting a topless hand shandy from that orange buffoon 😂
Gives “palm” a whole new meaning haha
@kerrynicholls6683 I'm really sorry to hear you're dealing with that set of disabilities. That's a tough road to hoe. If you are located in an urban area, consider connecting with a local disability rights group. They can be great communities that have helped many people in your circumstances find purpose and meaning to life.
@9:57 !!❤OMG i seriously LOVED the maths joke :) i wasn't sure if i liked you beforehand, but you totally got me, luv♡ lol too funny
Also, the Mets owner is a p.o.s. in my opinion. F that guy.
But that joke was Proper! 😂
Looking forward to seeing how the Southwest mistake will be addressed on Corrections.
I Am stooping to that level: Elon Musk is one weird and dangerous dude.
@alswedgin9274 jfc this is the comments section on yt. You’re practically begging someone to do exactly what you don’t want them to do.
Thank you for your comment, btw! ✌
I believe he's pretty weird and probably dangerous too 😮
G`night Seth
Technical note: The audio seems to be considerably quieter than the average youtube video (over compression is probably at fault, but it might just be quiet)
1.5 bn... with the documents maybe.... now... Not so much!
I guess Trump would be the perfect person to start human brain implant trials…under no circumstance whatsoever it could cause any harm…best case scenario, he looses the ability to speak and oh Lord wouldn’t that be a blessing?!
Serious Question: Is it possible to even rack up $45 worth of food from Taco Bell?! I once ordered a large soda from there, and I paid BARELY a dollar!
Mirror Lago has secrets buried there
Ted Cruz’s audiobook would be the aural equivalent of ozempic for me. My ears would puke.
I noticed seth had some hair go rogue around the 450 mark. Then had to watch the rest of this zoomed in in it.
Correction : former wannabe DICKtator took the WITLESS stand .. not WITNESS
That dementia patient hasn’t seen his sick since the Eisenhower administration. Just call him an asswipe.
Ozempic isn't a weight-loss drug, it's for treating diabetes. The fact that people are using it as a weight-loss drug has led to shortages around the world for people who actually need it for medical reasons.
It actually does not ‘treat’ diabetes. It changes the digestive system so that food digests slow enough for insulin production. It causes people to want to eat less and makes the body digest food more completely. Its two side benefits: lowers blood sugar and causes weight loss.
@@fsinjin60You're actuallying beside the point, there, chief.
The point is that vain and lazy people are putting people with an actual medical condition at increased risk.
@@Broccoli_Highkicks
I am trying to disabuse people that it is a diabetes treatment and needed by diabetics. I am an actual diabetic using Ozempic. Ozempic is not having shortages, just very high price unless it can be prescribed for you and covered by insurance. Diabetes is a good excuse but Ozempic is far from necessary and in fact attacks diabetes by changing a diabetics dietary habits. It’s a weight loss drug and lots of diabetics need to lose weight.
The $1K (€1K) cost per month will be with us as long as works for weight loss
@@fsinjin60it was made to "treat" diabetes. Stop trying to look smart by splitting hairs, just makes you an asshole.
@@fsinjin60 Thanks for literally proving that is, indeed, a treatment for diabetes...notice how the OP didn't say "cure"?
Thanks from the week of Nov 6
Seth, you're the best!!! Bird people... 🤣💖😁
I love seeing trump so unhappy in court. He looks like a child in time out. Does Colbert have Covid again?
I seriously hope not; but the question is valid.
No, he’s good. He recorded an intro for a reuploaded episode in the Late Show podcast, and just said they were off this week. Nothing about being sick. And he’s said before when he is.
I wondered the same thing about him having Covid again. Thanks desmondmolloy9173
He just recovered from another bout last week, I remember him saying.
@@desmondmolloy9173 Colbert took a week off after 5 months off due to the writer's strike WTF?
How is that ONE casket? C’mon graphics
Why did they use a picture of Gary Busey for a story about Boris Johnson?
I am very happy to hear Elon is going to have a brain implant! It will definitely help him in all his decision making.
It can’t hurt!
@@edvh88 unless he is SkyNet...
The Taco Bell order was only $10. The food delivery was $35. And it was cold since the driver held it out the window out of spite because he wasn't tipped another $10.
Please don’t blame the driver! Out of the $35 he is she only probably got $3.75.
#10 $Please and thanks
You have $10 in food delivered then you're 💩🧠 better tip $10 😉
Well, some 💩🧠s are disabled & poor...
Imagine being dumb enough to pay $45 for Taco Bell in any situation
@@chrismathes3647The irony of this statement is blinding.
Is This The Writing Of Robert Mclaren Himself ?
I'm curious what the tax assessment of MarALago says. What does he value it when it's time to pay?
9:10 - Wow, I just Googled it, and Seth's right - the moon IS within 16 billion inches from Earth. 😮
Funny 😁
I love the comment will have her over at your house if you feel bad about it, that is New York City brutality
13:04 Taco Bell is surprisingly expensive nowadays. The days of 59 cent tacos are gone.
That's why they sued Del Taco for taco Tuesdays huh, because Del Taco still did 3 taco tuesdays for $1.29 down the street from me.
$45 on Taco bell .. have you even seen inflation?
Click and Clack said to never get the first year they make something.
Let the makers work the kinks out first.
Anyway, neurolink
That's absolutely true for all technology and I love the Tappet brothers reference ❤
@@Popomcgo I loved wasting perfectly good hours listening to car talk
@@generaljellyroll8737 Growing up, most of my time with my Dad was spent driving long distances and he always had a cassette tape recording of the newest Car Talk, we would listen to it over and over. Thanks for the memory, friend :)
@@generaljellyroll8737 My favorite part of that show was how many times I started it knowing nothing about cars and finished it knowing nothing about cars, yet I learned about all kinds of other crap you would not expect to be brought up on a show called Car Talk.
“Bethany”. Hehe.
What did Patrick Dempsey write?
I suspect the piece of paper inidmissable evidence will be used for years as "proof", shame they didn't just let him submit it.
His 'defence' team, such as it is, had aaalllll the time they needed to submit any real evidence.
If there was a magic UNO-reverso card........they would have used it already.
Ozempic is a shot, not a pill
In bird people culture thats considered a dick move.
I'm just saying, considering the prices at fast food places now, $45 is like 3 tacos and a drink.
4 people, 2 chalupas each, 40 bucks. Seth ain't been to the bell in a minute.
If it is even remotely close to its reputation, I wouldn't blame Seth xD
For me... the best part of this debate is seeing all the latenight hosts attempting to avoid doing the same Chris Rock joke. There's really not a lot of maneuvering room, when Will Smith is that close to you.
It's not that hard to spend $45 at Taco Bell any more. I went in there a month ago and ordered a Burrito Supreme and three regular hard shell tacos. That came to $12, and that food was just for my lunch. Imagine buying for a family, and suddenly $45 seems like not so much. Well, it still seems like a lot, but that's why I never buy enough fast food to feed a whole family any more.
Also, on a side note, I remember when I was in high school, not only was the Burrito Supreme as long as my forearm, but it only cost $2. Now it's nearly $5 and it's only four inches long.
Why are your videos unavailable to Canadian viewers all of a sudden?
BAAAAAAAZE!😅
I surmise Stephen Colbert has Covid again.
He said he did. Kimmel’s band too.
I surmise South Carolina has some disease issues, not just because Colbert keeps coming back sick from his weekends off, but it's a red southern state that likely is a little lazy with STI prevention.(I just assumed and then looked, South Carolina is indeed one of the top 10 states for STIs)
I leaned forward and everything to follow along in prep to hear him try to say, "ornithological" again...
I'd say Mara Lago is worth $2 Billion+. Just ask Jared and Ivanka.
Correction: Chris Rock didn't duck the first time...
In fact he held his hands behind his back, leaned forward and said Uh-oh. Can't really duck any less than that so I don't see him doing it now
M&M joke...
Scollins!!??
NO Elon Musk's we himans like to see stars not your falling sati.
We're you falling asleep while typing this?
Stop using your elbow to type out comments
Yo!
Suh
Wilma...lmbo
Why can’t NYC have a decent mayor?
Dear Seth, my band MYTHOLOGICAL HORSES would love to play Late Night. Pretty please ❤❤❤
I'm sure Late Night has no booking agent.
I spend like 20 a person at tacobell... its not 2004 whens the last time you guys went to tacobell?
There is no public in front of him. Think about that for a minute. All you need is a camera, a desk, a hairdresser, a microphone and a computer. You can also hold a pen.
Old show ?
who's Patrick Dumpty ??
I guess Patrick Dempsey got the People magazine cover by telling them "pick me, choose me, love me!"😉
I think Ivanka would pull the plug.
Australia now has a shortage of Ozembic. Thanks, so much.
If you want to lose weight _eat_ _less_ than you use
Is it me or do you guys notice the noseless face on Steve Cohen's neck?
You want a real laugh Americans? Forget Boris, look up Jacob Rees Mogg.
Yeah... I know
Goosolini
Nyers is the type of guy who push his grand mother over a cliff. Myers took his family to the zoo and lefted them there. 😂😂😂
Congratulations, @user-cr5vc6xq3b, you’ve left your comment.
Could you please leave and let the Public Library Staff disinfect and sterilize the chair and the keyboard?
Thank you.
See you next month.
@@jamesbaker4806 I don't want to see his face again on you tube.
They don't need implants anymore.
Maybe Jill ran off with Jack...
WE ARE ALL VOTERS, THANKS TO TRUMP, DEMOCRATIC VOTERS!
Meyers stuck his face out the window was arrested for mooning.😂😂😂
ok when seth mispronounced the word ornithological,
Was. that on purpose?
Duchess Pushy doesn’t get her own mail, Seth.
WHO IS CONDITION 2024 IS Question ANSWER THEN ENJOY OR INSIDE OF S A I WHAT IS MEANING
The moment I saw the ornithological society I knew I was born to read the news. It was 1992. I was 3 years old, but already had an advanced vocabulary. I was spelling words like sesquipedalian as if I were born to lexicographer parents. Then, this segment came up. I laughed; I was naïve. I figured, who would trip on such an underthrow?! Little did I know, it was the day: the day I had always prepared for. Looks like it's time for my superpower to shine. Looks like I'm finally needed to ... read out loud.
It's an old secret schools no longer teach, but I have it hidden in plain sight, right here. Some may balk at seemingly implausible tasks such as reading tricky vernacular but I will never shy away from the opportunity to display my verbose reading skills in front of strangers. The only problem?! This voice is perfect for the job. If I were born to read the news in 1954, all of your grandmother's panties would have been precisely saturated previous so insemination thus resulting in not birthing your kin, or you.
My only regret in life is that you can't hear me narrate this comment, though I can hear me just fine.
Are there any people really believing that anything that falls out of Trumps mouth is true ?
In best case it is some leftover from his last burger. 😂
Lock him up finally.
Never trust a tv presenter with no lips.
I've noticed that the few times the show has made jokes about Harry and Meghan, I thought it felt kind of mean-spirited towards Meghan. It stands out to me, because I don't think that mean-spirited and/or picking on women is on brand for Seth. "Leave her alooooone!"
who gave the bird society legal authorization to rename anything ????
Lol 😂 They're WOKE!