Week in my life vlog: reading about mothers, martyrs, legacies
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- čas přidán 4. 02. 2024
- A very grey, very busy winter week in New York with three good books
1:40 Of Woman Born
2:12 Is Mother Dead in progress
9:02 wrapping up Is Mother Dead
11:19 wrapping up Of Woman Born
14:34 Martyr! in progress
18:20 legacies
Books:
Is Mother Dead by Vigdis Hjorth (trans. Charlotte Barslund) (2020)
Of Woman Born: Motherhood as Experience and Institution by Adrienne Rich (1976)
Martyr! by Kaveh Akbar (2024)
Mentions:
@MatthewSciarappa
talking about Of Woman Born previously: • Week in my life vlog: ...
Socials:
Insta: @sdelphis
StoryGraph: @sdelphis
Substack: sophiedelphis.substack.com
You’ve really made me want to read Is Mother Dead, I’ve been intrigued before but not actually tempted until now. Oh and Martyr. One day I reeeeeeally want to see you perform live!
Eep! So happy to hear that Martyr! is making its mark on you. Roots and Routes! I can’t wait to hear the rest of your thoughts on it!
And oof, Is Mother Dead has been on my radar for a while, but didn’t realize how uncomfortable it was. Need to pick it up!
Yes read it pls ❤
i’ll be curious to see if you also find is mother dead as uncomfortable as i did - you very well might not. i think it depends on yr relationship to memory, closure, walking away from relationships
i’ve been meaning to read hjorth for forever!! i think i have will and testament on my shelf waiting to be read. you and nathan also have me super interested in martyr! glad to hear you enjoyed it
ooh, definitely recommend trying hjorth. two books in, i’m very much a fan - i need to will and testament next!
About Is Mother Dead: my experience was I felt surprisingly “triggered” is the best way to put it. Like I could physically feel the sense of abandonment the main character was experiencing. Especially since her mother was SO close to her when they were both in the same city. The scenes where she’s physically trying to catch her mother at her home or on the sidewalk.
I for some reason found myself imagining if that were to happen to me and my mom. Oh, it was gut-wrenching. And so, it was a marvelous read, for me. The way a book can make that experience happen without being didactic. Chef’s kiss!
Martyr: I just finished this book myself and was also blown away by it. Just simply so satisfying, inventive. A wow. I miss NYC. I am due for a visit - while there, I exhaust myself. No matter the time of year, there’s a few experiences that MUST happen - I must run in Central Park and then, ideally, ride a bike around the perimeter. I must, later in my stay, head out very early, take as many subway rides as it takes to get to the High Line early, hardly any people, and run that. It’s a short run but oh so rich! I must also go to the Strand bookstore and various other musts that are just little enjoyments. Whatever else happens, great!
very much understand being triggered by the book, for a whole spectrum of reasons! did you think that johanna was telling a basically objectively true version of her childhood/ensuing relationship with her sister and mother? that she was righteous in pursuing the kind of life that she wanted? that she was warranted in wanting reconnection or closure? i wonder if some amount of “yes” to those questions is what makes the book triggering
@@bibliosophie ,ooooh yes...I meant to mention here my reaction to that part of the story...thanks for the response that's prompting me. I DID get a tiny bit judgy about leaving her seemingly alright relationship and taking her son (I think she took her son?) and starting a new life to pursue her art. It just seemed a bit cruel...regardless of gender, here. But then I think she made art that upset her mother, maybe it was considered too private if I'm recalling it correctly? That's a tough one. As a mother, the feeling I had was there's almost nothing that would ever make me discontinue contact with one of my adult kids. Almost nothing. Certainly not their choice to create art or write a book that reveals things that aren't pleasant about my mothering. Nope. I'd still have a relationship AND experience being hurt to a certain extent, but I don't hold grudges. Maybe that's why the mom's response was astounding to me. LIke, have the conversation, have it out, but then move on and continue the relationship! (I did believe the author's POV, btw, but I can have the wool pulled over my eyes pretty easily 😄
@@thelefthandedreader6632 thanks for the response! i’m fascinated by what people bring to those different elements based on their own lives/experiences/needs. bc even though this is a very specific story, it’s also a very recognizable (and therefore triggering) imbroglio. i’m totally on the narrator’s “side,” and i am believing her that her art isn’t cruel and her behavior wasn’t actually destructive to her family in the slightest at they categorize it, but i can imagine someone being hurt by a loved one’s actually exploitative art (or more general life decisions) and making a firm boundary of cutting off ties - i basically have done that myself
@@bibliosophie , it's really tough, isnt it? Creating firm boundaries with family members when necessary. I guess tough and not so tough, in the end.
@@thelefthandedreader6632loving this convo! Basically the entire book i was chuckling at johanna’s shenanigans despite it being genuinely sad but the pitiful aspect is funny. Like girl pls let it go. She made her decision as did her mother. I was never fully “on johanna’s side” because i 100% thought of her as an unreliable narrator/took her memories especially the more cruel elements with a grain of salt not as in disbelieving it ever happened but more like it probably wasn’t meant in the way she took it and over the years of separation she reimagined it differently. Regardless, damage was done. Drama was enacted by both parties and that really mirrors the two characters. Two sides of the same coin! And all in all it is an incredibly compelling, well done, well written story looking at the mother/child relationship in a fresh way that ultimately feels too real for its own good. And it’s funny to boot. I cannot reiterate how much I laughed reading this book.
I've read three books by Vigdis Hjorth so far and she definitely became one of my new favourite authors.
Of course the view in Is Mother Dead? is subjective, but it was the only POV I was interested in, because of the way the story was told and the spiralling and hypnotic voice it was narrated in. I loved the way this book was written. And I totally understood the urge for closure, as much as I know that if you want peace in a situation like the narrator finds herself in, you have to stop looking for answers and move on.
I highly recommend reading Will and Testament if you want more of this story.
thank you! i’m so interested to hear other people’s reactions
will and testament is definitely on my list of books to read. i’ve loved both of the hjorth novels i’ve read so far
“Martyr!” is worth the hype, in my opinion. I feel that it’s as much a story about the power of being alive as it is about death. I wonder if it’s the aliveness that gives the title its exclamation mark.
definitely about the power of life and really living - i’m thinking of the wild magical last chapter between cyrus and zee, for instance. endings that aren’t annihilations but the results of seasons/phases. i like the exclamation point being an assertion of aliveness (!)
Love it when we find the fast funny compelling read 🥲 i also agree with this assessment. So much heart ❤ oof that nyc winter sunset light 😍 glad to see you using your little penguin books ha! Every single time im absolutely floored by your singing shots!! I just can never get my mouth that open!!! Loving your hair lately 🤍
re yr comments on my hair and singing: 🥰
re winter sun: absolutely! felt particularly magical since we had solid grey for something like 10 days
i love you, sophie! 🧚♀💗✨🌸
🥹🤍
Sophie, I wanted to let you know I MAY be starting House of Mirth this wk. I read a few pages the other wk and thought…maybe. Let me know if you’re in the mood to start reading it. I think it may be one you want to get to. I know you’ll be starting East of Eden . I need to dip into that one to see if I want to start it in the near future. I’ll be scouting around for a used copy or the library
definitely not getting to house of mirth this month - i’m currently not reading very quickly AND i’m slated for like 5 buddy reads i absolutely will not get to by the end of feb ha ha ha
You should read “Die, My Love” by Ariana Harwicz. Its on motherhood, and other things as well! Disturbing yet introspective
thank you for the recommendation!
Wonderful vlog Sophie. Loved your thoughts on motherhood and Hjorth's book.
Not related to books or reading - I do hope you get some days off during the week as you work on Sundays. I know that for some off days are a luxury due to the precarious character of our existence in this toxic capitalistic system.
thank you! and thank you for hoping i get days off… unfortunately and pretty disastrously, i don’t have any days off built into my schedule. a couple of days are freer, but i’m currently in the situation i told myself i’d avoid of having at least one calendar commitment beyond my own personal practice/writing/etc everyday, and that’s not good. and i’m definitely partially to blame…
@@bibliosophie It is a learning process for us all. Learning to say no is also part of it. It is a journey. Sending love and support your way.
@@aleksismil it is indeed! thanks 🤍
i’ve been super curious about Martyr!
read it! worth the hype! i want to know if you agree. i think specifically it’ll resonate with you as a poet (or at least i’m hoping)
So excited to read Martyr!! Loved your review of it!
i’ll be looking forward to yours! i’m definitely on the hype train for this one!