WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BUDGETING PLAN??? ALSO THE ENTIRE STORY OF MY HISTORY WITH SHOPPING UP UNTIL NOW
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- čas přidán 30. 07. 2024
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HOW MY NO-BUY YEAR CHANGED MY LIFE (THE VIDEO): • HOW MY NO-BUY YEAR CHA...
MY NO-BUY YEAR PLAYLIST: • MY NO-BUY YEAR (FULL C...
HOW MY NO-BUY YEAR CHANGED MY LIFE (PLAYLIST): • HOW MY NO-BUY YEAR CHA...
VIDEO ABOUT MY 2021 SEASONAL SPENDING BUDGET PLAN: • 2021 PROJECT & CHANNEL...
00:00 introduction
00:53 my history of compulsive spending
4:57 the story of my no-buy year
7:58 healthy vs. unhealthy desire for beautiful things
10:16 my 2021 seasonal spending plan
11:17 what actually happened
19:13 thoughts and feelings about what happened
24:27 moderating without rules
27:34 browsing without buying
31:46 what’s going to happen next?
ON ME
my top is by Zara but I bought it secondhand from a Poshmark seller
my lip gloss is Merit Marrakech: shop-links.co/174741114384096... & I'm wearing a lip liner underneath, it's the Lancome Le Lip Liner in Natural Mauve: shop-links.co/174741607729932...
on my eyes I'm wearing the Shadow Kiss Palette from Alter Ego shopalterego.com/ (use code HANNAH for 10% off)
my nail polish is "Beatnik" from Cirque Colors: www.cirquecolors.com/beatnik/
BACKGROUND
The croc bag is the Teddy Blake Chiara Croco Brown: bit.ly/2pUHd00 and the smaller bag is a Mini Phoebe by Danse Lente.
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Adept Cosmetics magnetic palettes: bit.ly/2JInu9V (use code HANNAH15 for 15% off)
Erin’s Faces (this link is to the Peptide SPF 30, my fave sunscreen): bit.ly/2xrfR1z
YesStyle: shrsl.com/1v2wy (use the code YSHANNAHP10 for 10% off)
Zeesea cosmetics: bit.ly/3o8cOUw (use code HANNAHLOUISE for 10% off)
Sephora: rstyle.me/+9oAyH5MA4EZrrDzWgY...
Ulta: rstyle.me/+MmpA8wA2x590ZHOsPW...
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MY CHANNEL ARTWORK IS BY THE AMAZING HALLIE BREENE: halliebreene.myportfolio.com/
MY WEBSITE: www.hannahlouiseposton.com/
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FTC disclosure: This post contains affiliate links, which means I may receive a commission for purchases made through some of the links. THIS VIDEO IS NOT SPONSORED.
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IF YOU ARE A BRAND REPRESENTATIVE AND YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEND ME PRODUCT TO REVIEW, please send an email about the product to mynobuyyear@gmail.com. I only accept PR with no strings attached. Everything I receive will be shown and reviewed honestly on my channel as part of my regular content. Please don't inquire about color contacts, magnetic eyelashes or hot tools for hair, I'm not interested in reviewing those. Thanks!
I AM NO LONGER ACCEPTING SUBSCRIBER GIFTS IN THE MAIL. I hope you can understand, I’m trying hard to minimize the number of my belongings and stem the flow of new stuff into my life! I’d prefer for you to spend your money taking good care of yourself. Your viewership already means the world to me ❤️
If you would like to lend financial support to the growth of my CZcams channel, you can donate by becoming a Patreon patron: / hannahlouiseposton or by clicking through this link: bit.ly/2QCatzZ
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING AND BEING WONDERFUL!
I've never been on a no buy, never even thought about needing to go on one. It's not the reason I watch Hannah's videos.
I watch for sentiments like this: "I'm working on becoming a person that is the source of her own contentment. And that is what I want that for you, too."
I don't know Hannah in real life, but certain things just speak right to my heart and I swear that was one of them.
❤
Can I just say how much I ADORE the way you articulate yourself?? You always know just how to express these complex feelings in the most comprehensible and relatable way! I've been with you since the nobuy and it brings me so much joy to see how well you are and how everything has evolved! I actually teared up at the end, thank you for being my constant companion on my own karmic journey and helping me so much without even knowing it ❤❤❤
I, too, love Hannah’s manner of speech. I wish I could articulate myself the way she does. #articulationgoals
It would be weird if there was still mainly no-buy-content on your channel. We all change and develop - well let’s hope at least! I am not and have never been a make up person but I still enjoy your content because I love when somebody is so passionate about beautiful things and has such a adorable way to put her thoughts into language. You are a constant reminder for me to enjoy what I already have. Thanks Hannah 🙏
I just binged a lot of your no buy videos and this one came at the perfect time. I have a very addictive personality and love makeup so I often use the act of spending money as a coping mechanism for when I’m feeling out of control over my life (since spending money is the one thing I can control, and having the latest and greatest gives me a surge of serotonin). I keep buying new things and they just get put away in a drawer and almost never get used. Don’t get me wrong, I love makeup, but this has gone beyond the fun aspect of makeup - it’s a very bad habit that I now need to force my brain out of, so I can get back to actually enjoying the art. Thank you thank you for this 🙌🏻
you can do it! being able to articulate what you are doing is a huge and challenging first step that you have already taken
Oh wow, I just commented before having read your comment and it's insane how similar my feelings are to what you are explaning here! You've got this♡
Yes I am the same
Yes. Exactly this.
I'm in exactly the same boat but it's so much easier said than done.
I love hearing about journey Hannah! Also, you look amazing x
thank you so much, Samantha!! Sending lots of love to you!
Just saw an article where Jordan Chiles was asked how she was coping with all the stress of the Olympics and her answer was ‘online shopping’. It made me realize I’ve been doing the exact same thing the past few weeks to deal with the stress of an urgent health situation with a family member. Think it may be time for another no buy… 💖💖💖
I recently unsubscribed from a lot of beauty youtubers after coming to the conclusion that watching so much beauty content makes sticking to my budget an unnecessarily hard struggle. Not from you, though, your channel is the only one that never makes me feel that compulsion to shop, and it's because your content is so thoughtfully made, truly rare in the beauty space! I recently watched your year of no buy videos and they helped me see how unhealthy my beauty shopping habits had become, thank you so much! 💖
I also curated my Instagram feed along with my CZcams feed. They were distracting me. Now I follow a couple creators so pretty pictures not in front of me all the time.
@@cgomez113 I definitely feel what Hannah said about how different people will have to make different choices on how to deal with these things, and for me limiting the amount of "pretty" that gets put in front of me daily helped a lot! Glad to hear it helps others too.
My therapist says it’s ok to not be hard on yourself...& not always judging yourself. So I think you are accepting your growth & the hard work you have put in. Great job! And I love that you are sharing it ❤️
You were trying to fill an emptiness before. In the last three years you've filled that emptiness with something different: a cool creative enterprise, a beautiful life with friends and Joe, a badass career of your own making, a stronger focus on compassion towards others, a community of supporters and a new confidence in yourself, and so much more. ❤💙💜
Omg, I don't pay you enough on Patreon. This content is priceless. Thank you so much for sharing!
just being a patron for ANY AMOUNT makes the biggest difference in the world to me!!!
I just love the way you speak. Listening to you is just a pleasure 💖 such a gem in the beauty space where everybody speaks the same way, using the same words, screaming and with bad grammar 🙈
Hilarious! You are so right.
Hearing bad grammar and nonsense like 'you need this in your life' bother me. Even worse is using bad language. 😑
Thank you for inviting/taking us along on your journey.
Hi Espie! Thank you for being here
The 6 month mark thinking you did it and then the re-trauma sounds like an extinction burst! That's hard stuff. It's so cool you made it through it all tho! You're definitely an inspiration!
I really relate to your sandle story, as you were speaking i realised i did the same thing recently. I decided i wanted an oversized fluffy hat, but like a really big one, and i spent a few days looking online for one. I didnt buy anything, and 3 weeks later i have lost interest
Thank you for sharing your journey and self reflection 💖
I very much needed this video right now. Bracing myself for a no buy- I’ve been overspending to cope with anxiety and hard situations.
Same here 😩🙈
I'm a young person who has basically grown up being completely saturated by advertisements and rampant consumerism. It's exhausting. Your videos, your beautiful thoughts have been so refreshing to me. Thank you for the work you do!
As a a loyal viewer since the beginning, I had a secret feeling/hope that the training wheels would fall off this year. Thank you for sharing your journey so vulnerably with us. It has truly been a joy watching you grow! ❤️
I missed this type of content from you so much! I am getting married in a few days and really relate to the sentiment of wanting to spend on a joyous occasion without stressing about whether the money is coming from the wedding budget or my personal spare funds.
I needed this video right now. I'm trying to figure out what is coping mechanisms and what is exploring new things and trying to elevate my look. It's hard but your videos constantly help me find new ways to explore that and draw those lines.
there's this great thread that I was apart of on r/shoppingaddiction talking about the "hyperfocus" part of online shopping or habits in general. I think it goes hand in hand with the experience you were speaking of in the first part of this video. I love videos like this btw, it feels like shopaholics anonymous 😅
even though you no longer plan to make dedicated no-buy makeup content, hearing these messages sprinkled throughout is much appreciated!
adding on to your ending message, I think it connects to the concept of minimalism vs essentialism. Lately minimalists are seen as those who take part in having less and having the concept of less being a tangible goal to reach. Essentialists tend to distinguish themselves as only focusing on what is needed for the individual, not necessarily the attainment of less.
You no buy year playlist was SO HELPFUL for me during 2020. Kept me from stress buying. And I still find myself asking similar questions from your videos for anything I want to buy. I find myself rewatching your no buy year playlist when I feel like spending money
My heroine online. Thank you Hannah. You have helped me change my life💘😚
also that nailpolish color with the brown shirt is chef's kiss!
I'm so happy for you that moderation comes more naturally to you now. It sounds like you are in such a good headspace when it comes to shopping.
thank you! The journey isn't over but I do really feel like I'm out of the woods. It's a big relief!
I have rewatched your videos from the year of your “no buy” numerous times! They are so raw/real, which makes them relatable to those of us guilty of over shopping. ❤️
I loved listening to this- I've been a ardent admirer since the og project and it's been a parallel journey and helpful voice to my own experiments and no buys, budgets, etc. I feel like your intuition is 100% correct here. When I worked in healthcare, we used Six Sigma, and part of that was tracking if any given metric was "in" or "out" of control. The idea is that just because there's a problem, you don't want to expend resources "fixing" it if it it is not out of control because on some scale, there will always be mistakes. I kind of like that as a metaphor for personal issues. I know what out of control spending feels like and looks like, and I know that is when I need to employ tools to help things get in control. I feel like you are describing an in control system. The alternative, which I see sometimes, is to almost fetishize spending as if every purchase is evil, the spender is bad and must punish him or herself, and so on. In reality it's just a matter of balancing the things one really values against each other. Anyway, continue to love your journey & content and am grateful for all that you share (but also fully support the fact that you do not need to share everything with us).
I love this, thank you so much for sharing. This is why I included the story about the fuzzy shoes shopping. It's been so freeing to realize that "being okay" doesn't mean never ever slipping into that mode of being focused on shopping. Imperfect or less-than-ideal behavior can still be an "in-control system" as you say, one which is gently handled and improved upon over time rather than battled and punished!
This month of July will be the first month since some time 2018 where I have not purchased a single beauty item in a whole month.
These journeys can take so long and I've been so happy to have your videos and experiences alongside that. In my own time I've been in therapy and digging into my soul's garbage and those have been the biggest things to help get me out of the cycles.
Life is never structured or as strict as we'd like it to be. Allowing that ebb and flow to exist is what I percieve to be the healthiest of ways to exist. I'm glad you haven't had us or anyone in the digital spaces of your life looking over your shoulder at every single decision you make in terms of spending. It sounds like its taken a type of pressure off yourelf. 💖
Hannah, I’m so proud of you! I remember you wondering if you ever could successfully moderate, and you’ve done it. Congrats.
thank you Michelle!
Hannah, you are the Ram Das of the beauty community on YT. I appreciate your wisdom, your generosity and candor, and the soulful insights you unveil for us. Thank you THANK YOU.
Thank you for keeping me in check! I realized I am a hospital worker, I need to mask daily, I wear safety glasses and scrub caps because washing my hair every day wasn’t happening. I did a ruthless makeup declutter & gifted things I had never used to friends, tossed lousy products. What I have now I love, my purchases now are things like new work shoes, good work socks, skin care. My treats ? The new shade of Auric & the life’s a draft palette. I have learned that just because I want it doesn’t mean I am going to die if I don’t get it. LOL, three weeks later I basically have forgotten the thing I just felt I had to have.
I’m so thankful to hear this video. I was using alcohol to also band aid and not feel. I quit that in the beginning of 2020 and started watching CZcams makeup videos to pass the time- now I started shopping for makeup akin care and realize I’m using that in the same way I was using wine.... I’m inspired by you.
Congratulations! That’s awesome and a huge accomplishment! Not the shopping but the quitting drinking
I just love listening to you talk. You have such a talent of phrasing ideas and crafting metaphors that are really on point. I could listen to you for hours.
Can we pause here to recognize how beautifully, how poetical, how well you express yourself? Following your thoughts as you speak is a pure delight. That, and the fact that the more you say, the more I think "This is my long lost twin!". And I'm sure I'm not the only one thinking this. I too when younger reflected on my love of dressing as "drag", and I too love this intricate, sensitive, most beautiful art form. You convey your journey in such a refined and nuanced language that is pure pleasure to listen to.
I loved the end of this video. It felt so warm and nostalgic. Thank you for all the work that you've done and allowing us into your world
Congratulations on the engagement, I'd totally missed that! The way you think through your choices very consciously has always been so useful to me, I'm so happy you're in a place where they've become more natural. ❤
I'm so happy for you! I've recently been following your progress, and listening to your journey and I'm so happy to see how much you've grown over your time of youtube!
Perfect timing!! It's time for this beauty-lover to reign herself in again!
I loved the wrap up starting in the last five minutes. It’s been really fun having a similar journey that was inspired by you, and I’m very pleased that my relationship with buying things is also no longer compulsive. You rule!
Congratulations on identifying as whole and healthy! I've been along for the since the end of your no buy year. It was a beautiful moment to see you say that, and see you feel it in your heart. To me it parallels but is many times elevated from your revelatory moment buying the Maybelline lipstick all that time ago. I am so happy for you!
giirrrrl thank you, you are truly a bright spark on this platform, talking so personally to, as it seems, so many of us. sisterhood.
Thank for the reminder that we must be our own contentment. It's so easy to get caught back up in filling the void with stuff. I needed the concept refreshed in this way!
I'm about to complete a rewatch of your whole channel, and see this video in particular makes me feel so proud of you and inspired to do the work myself. I can't wait to see how your channel will evolve and transformer, thank you for being so public and vulnerable up until now!
Thank you Hannah. You inspire me and this video, containing your profound messages, was exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you so much! I appreciate you being here in this platform. Xx
I'm so unbelievably happy for you, this feels so natural and healthy and it's just wonderful to see.
You’re my inspiration on my road to recovery from shopping addiction. 🥳😊😊
Hannah, thank you so much for everything you share. I am, to use your word, awakening, and identifying so many things within myself as I consume your videos. I just really appreciate you. ❤️
I’m SO proud of you, Hannah! Not only for putting in so much hard work to keep growing, but also for recognizing how much you’ve grown.
I just found your channel and you are so thoughtful and articulate! I went on a no buy in 2020 except for a few slips and it has totally changed my spending habits, so excited to delve further into your channel!
You continue to inspire me HLP! I am moving next summer and it has been completely and totally liberating to start the process of near weekly declutters as I continue to think about fewer, nicer things in my own life. Thank you for bravely sharing your experiences and insight because I think we all need it. I really resonate with that internal feeling you describe where you had hoped to fill a void of inadequacy with stuff which ultimately never happens and always falls short of your expectations.
So glad to hear you’re learning to “organically” budget & buy beautiful things! ♥️
love hearing your thoughts! I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about the word want (all the various definitions and the associated ~feelings~) and this video really resonates! 💞
Oh my goodness. This was an exceptional video of finding and wanting ones true self. I do hope you continue on your path snd lead us to a place of beauty in the way you so eloquently express. Here’s to finding all things beautiful in our authentic self on our journey.
Love this video and channel so much, it’s a big breath of fresh air
Your whole story is so inspiring, but especially this part. It gives me hope that I can do better as someone who tends to emotionally shop. Thank you for sharing your journey. Your videos have helped me immensely. So much gratitude.
This video has come at exactly the right time for me, so thank you so much. While watching I totally realised that I have been so successful in lowbuy on my beauty budget because........I've been transferring this spending on home wear and decorating. It's just another way of me trying to control my environment and achieve my fantasy self..... instead of doing the emotional work ON myself. Time to regroup and reassess. THANK YOU ❤️
I've encountered your content over the last day or so at just the right time for me. I've known I needed to so some self-intervention for awhile now, but have been afraid to make the plunge, and seeing your journey has provided the last bit of motivation I needed - which is to say, it has provided hope. I've been working on excavating the sources of my desires and habits for some time now, but am now in a place where I thoroughly understand myself but am doing nothing to change the things I'm seeing. One of the things that makes that difficult (or is this reasoning just another excuse not to?) is that I've also been working on moderation over extremes, so there is something tempting about the hardcore-ness of a No-Buy year, there is also the fear that it would be an issue in its own way. But I also know that a lot of my extreme behavior in the past has burned out after a short period, and the idea of this long-term commitment is appealing, especially as we approach the new year. Anyway, I'll save the rest of these thoughts for my journal (or should I start a whole vlog series myself (another extreme?)?), but all that to say, thank you for sharing your experiences and worldview
I love watching your channel Hannah and hearing about your journey of self improvement.. I am thrilled that you were able to practice self restraint even while navigating a stressful time in your life!
You inspire me and give me hope that I too will be able to have a healthy relationship with shopping in time. Keep being you! You rock 😘
Ps Your makeup was on point today!!! 🤩
It has been a true pleasure to watch your evolution these last few years, Hannah. Your insight and emotion reading Ram Dass (who, weirdly, I somehow didn't know until Kackie recommended one of his books and now it seems I'm seeing his words *everywhere*) is exactly what I needed to hear today ; thank you
Oh Hannah, you are doing so well! ❤️ I am so proud
This came out at the perfect time! I need a no buy reset. Went on vacation and I've been spending since then. A few weeks, but I don't want to let it keep going on... love these videos!!!!
You are one of the reasons why I enjoy CZcams. It's been educational and empowering to watch you navigate your own burdens with a mindful eye. Thank you for sharing your reflections!
It is so nice to hear that I am not the only one dealing with this. I could not find the words to describe what I was feeling/going through for so long, but you did it so perfectly. Thank you for letting me know it is possible to change. I just found your channel about a week ago and I am so greatful I did. Thank you for all of your content and all you do! 💕
I am so proud of you, thank you for sharing this! You've come such a long way ❤️
Brilliant! I remember finding you when you were mid no buy year, I watched thinking woah, I wish I could be more Hannah and continued on splurging for another 18 ish months 🤦🏻♀️
I kept referring back to your videos from the no buy year and started formulating my own rules , that seemed to fit my patterns, Started downsizing , starting to be realistic about my consumption, one thing at a time, falling off the wagon and getting to the root of my problem .
My aim is to love what I own and stick to my low buy rules, and be more mindful about my choices . I want to thank you for sharing it all with us and for your point of view as i feel it’s sorely needed , especially on this platform 💋
Oh my goodness. Stumbling upon your channel recently was just so perfectly timed for me. Everything you said here resonated with me so profoundly. I'm so grateful to have found someone who has learned to embrace their love of beauty without falling down the rabbit hole of consumption. Thank you so much for this!
Hanna Louise Freaking Poston!! I hope you feel incredibly proud of yourself!!! Both for how far you’ve come on your journey towards natural moderation and for how gracefully you’ve adjusted your presence on CZcams to fit your comfort level!
I can relate so much to this. Circumstances forced me into a three year no shopping break (basic and bare essentials only) that was very humbling and eye opening. Thank you for sharing your journey. It feels great to shop intentionally and invest in things you truly love, doesn’t it? So glad I found your channel. 😘
I'm glad I found your channel back in your No-buy year because I got so much out of your journey. I wasn't on the same path as you but it definitely weaved it's message into how I think now about wanting things. I unknowingly took you "masterclass" lol. I'm so glad you ended with being the source of own contentment. It's what I reach for & encourage others to do as well. Whether it's taking that power back or just realizing it.
This was like looking into a talking mirror for me. Wow - not sure you can ever realize what an inspiration this has been for me.
You sharing your story has made a difference. THANK YOU ❤️🙏❤️
Xo Tammy 🇨🇦
You are hands-down one of the most important people that I follow and have discovered on the Internet. Sitting with you and sharing in your feelings, even if I’m usually a quiet watcher, feels like being back in English classes in college with my friends, grappling with the world around us and trying to articulate it, and it really makes me feel like things are going to be OK. I’m really proud of you, Hannah.
I woke up abruptly from sleep and decided to watch this video because your voice is very soothing haha and this ended up being the video I needed. Wide awake literally and figuratively, thanks, you have no idea how much I needed this. I admire you very much for doing the work and sharing it all with us. Now go live in moderation and enjoy your engagement season 🤗
This is my favorite kind of content in general, and particularly from you. I appreciate the effort you put into contemplating your own behavior and making videos about it, and you have helped me (and a lot of other people) find a healthier relationship with shopping and find good life coping skills. It's also cool to see your progress in real time, how a no buy can be successful and how a person could follow it up and continue to improve their life. Thank you!
Your message is extraordinary, brave, heartfelt, and something I, and many of us, very much identify with. Your honesty in sharing your journey is so helpful and inspiring.
I’m so happy for you that you don’t need to do public budgeting anymore. I’m also going to miss your budgeting contents because I love them.🥰 Please do share with us your purchases if possible. I just really appreciate your taste in things and I always love your fashion contents.
I will keep sharing purchases from time to time! Get ready for the next video :)
I have a similar compulsion even though I’m blessed that I still have my emergency and school savings. I’m committed to healing, thank you for your videos ♥️🙏🏻
Thank you so much for sharing your journey with us. It has been so helpful!!
I’ve been binging your content since last Fall, and decided to embark on a No Buy in 2022. I just want to thank you for your candor, your vulnerability, your articulation and your advice. You are truly inspiring.
I had a similar journey, after doing a 6-month no buy alongside your videos, I really processed through what was making me want to shop and spend money, and I became addicted to the feeling of not spending money and seeing my savings grow. The pandemic forced me to learn to cook (because eating out was my vice), so now instead of having to create strict rules around that category, I am able to eat out occasionally without overdoing it and maintaining an actual budget.
It’s amazing what a no buy can do! So happy for you Hannah.
I've decided to do a no-buy year next year, and your videos have really inspired me. Thank you so much! It's really about developing the capacity to be one's own source of joy.
I turned 40 last weekend and got given money as presents from various relatives. Spent some on dining out, a mascara and one item of skincare, and now I have money to spend on beautiful things. Yet, I filled my cart with things I have had on my wishlist and just don't want to go through with it! I've gotten so accustomed to monthly beauty budgeting that I feel weird about spending a lot of money at once! Is this the Hannah Louise Poston effect?
edit: watched the whole video. Been here since the no buy year and it's been beautiful to watch and share in your journey, and embark on my own 💃
Yaaay for you on so many levels!!! You've really put in the effort to make personal improvements, and to such good effect! It's been such a pleasure to watch your journey! I think it's so generous of you to share these aspects of your life. Thank you so much! Congratulations on your wedding engagement! All the very best to you and yours, Hannah!
🦋🧡🦋
Thank you so much!!
Thank you so much Hannah for sharing your life and heart with us. You are such an inspiration and you so beautiful inside and out. 🙏🏻❤️
I cannot get over your eyebrows. Every time I watch your videos, I’m so distracted by your amazing eyebrows.
Hannah, I have been following you since your first video. I am so proud of you. I think you have worked out online the “human experience”. Many of us go through a version of these transitions, not necessarily via spending money and beautiful things, but most of us transition and mature inside our heads. I have told you before, through emails, that there is a book here and I still believe it. Congratulations 🎉 on your engagement 🥰🇨🇦.
Hannah, thank you for sharing so much of your journey with us! I’ve been following you since the very end of your no but year, and I’ve watched almost every video on your channel. It’s been amazing, encouraging, and insightful to watch your growth and hear ~ all the feelings ~ behind it, I’ve grown so much in my own consumerism journey from your wisdom and vulnerability. I don’t know you and you don’t know me, but I’m so proud of you! And can’t wait to see what’s next for you in this next season of “living normally”! ♥️
thank you so much, Lauren!!!
This might be your most important video ever. My joy for your self-actualization approaches the depths it has reached. Trainingwheelslessness suits you
This came after I just went on a binge shop. Like you I’ve attempted budgeting and creating a shopping budget… then I moved and forgot about it. When I moved to the new place I needed some articles of clothing to help me get through their winters. In a span of 5 years weathering the pandemic and grad school and move across states, and miscarriage my body changed so much! I doubled in size and felt defeated when shopping. All this talk about fast fashion and how bad it is left me spiraling between, “I need to replace my only 2 pairs of pants with holes in the crotch” but “I love these pants” then “hold out for nicer better quality jeans” but “I can’t find them!!!!” So “fast fashion it is” and “well, it’s not the best but I literally can’t wear jeans with holes in the crotch” and finally “I need to accept the size I am and do my best”. So I went on a shopping binge and restocked my wardrobe and feel soooo guilty. But why? I haven’t bought clothes since 2 years ago and I learned more about dressing my new body size. Now, I’m having the reverse problem where I feel guilty for restocking my wardrobe. A family member will shame me for buying too many pairs of pants (3) or sandals (3 in neutral colors). So then to alleviate the guilt I have to say “I have holes in my crotch jeans and never wore sandals previously in my life not to mention my body has changed so much!” Is buying 3 new bras too much when my bust size has doubled without my okay causing me to replace all the smaller bras that don’t fit!?” LOL😂 Im recognizing I don’t regularly shop… I binge but I binge because my style of clothing and shoes is not always in style and I don’t want to settle for something that is not me. So I wait as long as I can until I feel inspired and then binge shop. But seriously Im still wearing hand me downs from my mom from years ago and still wear items I’ve kept for decades like my chuck taylors. Moral of the story… shopping ebbs and flows and removing guilt but making small improvements here and there to compound over time is part of the ebb and flow. But I don’t need to feel guilt whether I’m in a binge or not. Most of the guilt comes from peoples evaluation of my behavior, habits, and situation which they don’t know about.
Congrats Hannah for your engagement and your path to personal growth.
How you articulate alone is goals for me. I just love you!
Hannah you are just amazing. Thank you so much for this detailed thoughtfulness.
I love how eloquent you express your opinions❤
I am so glad that you have found healing and recovery, Hannah! 😊💜
thank you!
I find it really amazing the capacity you have to share your joy and excitement. Yes, your content/style of videos has changed over the years but in a smooth transition / evolution (although it must not have felt that way for you) and as long as your journey is bringing you Closer to your truth, your videos will always be a pleasure to watch. Thank you for continuing your Journey with us!! Luv ❤️
thank you, Sophie!
Sorry for this novel of a comment, I just need to put these thoughts somewhere. Hearing you talk about your past shopping struggles resonates with me so strongly, except that I merely compulsively browse and pretty seldom purchase the things I've been pining over. Since middle school, I've developed a habit where I scour websites, usually for clothing but can be extended to any other item category: I have to look at every option, I have to do intense research on anything I might buy, I will repeatedly return to obsessively look at the items I want to hem and haw over them. I grew up with a frugality mindset that has been very hard to shake (hence the not purchasing part), but it clashes with the parts of me that 1.) are genuinely interested in fashion and clothing, and B.) hyperfocus on one thing or another. When you mentioned your hunt for a fluffy sandal, I totally saw myself in that. I'll get some idea in my head, and then spend hours, if not days searching high and low. I don't currently have a job and I am very sustainably minded which means that I do most of my shopping on Poshmark or Depop, which sounds great (and is in many ways, since I also love vintage clothes) but the sheer amount of items there are on these sites means I get sucked in that much more deeply, just needing to find one more amazing find that I will most likely never buy. In the that I have actually followed through and purchased something, the novelty wears off so quickly-- my brain loves jumping to new ideas, so once it's no longer new and shiny it falls out of favor (and I now have a closet where nothing matches because my tastes change so quickly and drastically). And to top it all off, it's not an enjoyable experience! It feels quite awful! In fact, I have this same problem with social media in general and only within the past year realized that I don't have an "addictive personality" as I always claimed, but I actually use these behaviors to self-soothe. I am intrinsically a very anxious person, and recently have become acutely aware of the way I jump to distraction any time I feel a twinge of discomfort or anxiety (and of course these behaviors ironically just make me feel even more frantic and anxious). I do this with podcasts, CZcams videos, anything to take over and numb my brain and body a bit. It might not sound so bad since I'm not incurring debt, but when I consider the sheer amount of time, energy, and stress that goes into these things I very honestly begin to mourn all the time and happiness I've lost over the years. I also balk at how much time and energy I spend into watching other people live their lives, more than I dedicate to living my own life. It really feels like a death of a better life I could have had.
Part of why I love watching this channel is that I greatly admire your resolve to undergo something as drastic and daunting as a no-buy, and I feel desperate to implement a similar program for myself as I have a very "all-or-nothing" personality, yet I don't even know what form it would take. I've tried digital detoxes to varying degrees of success, but it always comes back sooner or later. Could I possibly undergo a challenge of not using the internet for a year (except for that which is truly truly necessary)? Immediately my brain thinks of all the ways it could never work, but another part of me revels in the prospect of freedom that might give me. And of course I'm an externally motivated gal, so if it were to work I would need a big system of accountability; I toy with making a CZcams channel about it, but that seems to pretty directly contradict my main goal. Anyways, I'm really grateful to feel a little less alone about all this and gather ideas for my own emotional and mental detox that needs to occur in some shape or fashion. I can't keep not living my dream life! 😤😤
Dang, what an arc. :) I’m so proud of you!!!
Fantastic video, especially the end. Thank you ❤️
I just found you! It's like the clouds parted and you fell into my lap at just the right time. ❤❤ will be binging your videos this weekend.🎉
Absolutely loved this ❤ thank you so much Hannah, thank you!!!!!
Wow! I followed your no buy year since the first video and then watched your content for a while after but then just life got in the way and I stopped watching most of youtube. Just remembered you today and came back to see how you're doing and it's just incredible to watch this video and to see how far you've come and how useful the entire no buy year project was. Incredibly happy to see this, wishing you all the best
"My name is Hannah and this is my no cake year" 😂
ahahah NEVER
While I love your beautiful things content, listening to you muse and reflect will always be my favourite. I wholly appreciate you point of view, you have really helped my own relationship with money. You gave me the framework that appreciating something’s beauty doesn’t have to translate into ownership.