Show, Don't Tell Writing Technique | EasyTeaching
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- čas přidán 8. 09. 2024
- Show, Don’t Tell is a very useful creative writing technique.
When a writer ‘tells’, they present information simply by stating it. Writing that ‘tells’ tends to be passive and distant, and can often feel like the writer is simply providing a summary of events, rather than actually telling a story.
Writing that ‘shows’, describes actions and makes the reader infer emotions or other information. That is, it makes the reader do some work. Writing that ‘shows’ uses descriptive language, actions and dialogue to bring the story to life. It creates a more memorable reading experience.
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My try at improving the suggested paragraph: Droplets of rain laid strewn across the umbrella tops that sat dotted around the large pool. The still damp concrete warmed under Vivien's feet as she stood at the starting blocks along with her fellow competitors. She took a slow deep breath and whispered to herself, "You can do this. You've practiced just as hard as they have." She braced her legs under her and as she trained her ear for the sound of the starting gun, she glanced around at the seven other swimmers and the scattered audience. Her classmates and their families filled the stands in an arrayment of colors, boasting their individual houses.
Great writing!
From:
It was a drizzly morning at the local pool. Vivien stood on the starting blocks along with seven other swimmers. She was nervous. As Vivien stood waiting for the starting gun, she looked around. Students clad in their house colors filled the stands.
To:
Vivian felt the gray sky with its even grayer clouds, heavy with rain pressing down on her. She peered down at the line of swimmers to her right, and she wished those clouds would unleash completely. Her stomach was a tight knot and it took nearly all of her focus to keep her legs from shaking. It took the little remaining focus left to ignore all of the eyes on her, clad in their house colors, every single one of them waiting for her to fail.
Show, don't tell is my favorite writing technique of all time.
FROM:
It was a drizzly morning at the local pool. Vivien stood on the starting blocks along with seven other swimmers. She was nervous. As Vivien stood waiting for the starting gun, she looked around. Students clad in their house colors filled the stands.
TO:
Drizzle rippled throughout the pool, as students decked out in their house colors filed into the stands. Vivien’s hands trembled as she gripped the starting block. Her eyes darted between the seven other swimmers as they awaited the sound of the starting gun.
Second one sounds really imersive it really got me imagining the scenario!
A sound awaking to rain hitting the ground, dark gray skies, pedestrians alerted about the weather conditions put on warm puffy jackets and headed towards the swimming competition located at the communities local pool one morning. Following along one contestant named, “Vivan” arrived, standing at the beginning mark waiting for the starting signal, however she was constantly looking around nervously and pacing her body back and forth and began sweating. Vivan stood there along with 7 other contestants who seemed more prepared and braver than her, who were also getting ready to participate in the swimming competetion. Students wearing black and yellow presenting Rock Road High School swimming team, proudly cheered loudly rooting for Vivian's victory.
Was very Helpful and very easy to understand I will 100% leave a like on this video 🥳🥳
Really useful for my Discord server roleplay to be a semi-lit for a character that barely speaks.
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bro what-💀
@EasyTeaching Thanks Just wondering if you make these videos with videoscribe or is that other tool?
Good teaching
can u pls upload some more grammers quickly i know editing is hard but can u pls put some 8th grade grammers too itss better than 45mins class than 5 to 6 mins video with great explanation it would sooo helpful not only for me but others u should defenitely deserve more subs keep it up!!❤❤😊
Thanks for the suggestions!
It seems like "show, don't tell" can cross the line into florid prose fairly quickly
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y
Interpreting show is subjective. (He yawned reflects…sleepiness). ‘Graceful flick of her wrist,’ implies that she is practicing? Showing too much requires imagination. What do the majority of writers think? Have their readers been taught to translate show? The lazy readers will get their fill quickly and will begin glancing instead of reading? So, how will a writer balance show vs tell?
You are right that balancing 'show' and 'tell' in writing is a very important consideration. There is no one right answer. It can depend on audience, the style of writing, the mood the writer wants to convey, etc.
I never quite agreed with the idea that "showing" must necessitate more inference/work from the reader. Example:
>> 1. Jane grew sad about the loss of her child.
>> 2. A fountain of tears poured out of Jane's eyes as she looked at the picture of her child.
>> 3. Jane's grief consumed her, plunging her into an emotional abyss from which no lifetime's worth of tears could offer any solace. The vibrant colors of the world faded into the coldest of greys, and all she could remember was the lifeless body of her child.
Which one is the most expositional/beige/boring, and which requires the most inference? I actually think #1 requires the most inference/work about how Jane is feeling and is the most boring/expositional to read, since "grew sad" is very vague and seems to be glossing over her feelings. #3 requires the least inference (as it's painting the most clear and vivid picture of her psychological state) but also seems the least boring/beige/expositional. #2 is in the middle.
Another example:
>> 1. The weather was 96 degrees F. Jane felt hot.
>> 2. Jane wiped the sweat from her brow and began walking towards the shadows given the hot temperature outdoors.
>> 3. As beads of sweat formed on Jane's brow under the scorching heat of the sun, all she could think about was a cold can of beer.
#3 again seems to require the least amount of inference about how Jane (our POV character) feels. #1 might require less inference about the _actual weather_ in some objective/empirical way, but I don't think that's what we're generally trying to infer so much as how our narrator/POV character feels about the weather. The most evocative prose often seems to be prose that is describing how things feel through a biased lens, not how they actually are like a completely unbiased news report.
It's objectivity as I see it which makes prose read like an infodump. The more objective the narrator is, the more the prose comes off as exposition. The more subjective the narrator is, the less. The level of detail doesn't seem to matter too much. Describing a person in the most objective way possible like their precise height, mass, skeletal proportions, muscular configuration, etc, still reads like an infodump even if it's meticulously detailed and not at all summarized since it's way too objective. We want to know how the narrator specifically and subjectively perceives and feels about the person, not a scientific description of the person.
Like an interesting photograph isn't capturing the person as they are so much as how the photographer subjectively feels and perceives the person, being very careful to light and pose the subject and choose the camera angle which reveals specifically how the photographer subjectively sees the subject. If it's very objective, the photograph might begin to look like a mugshot with very even lighting and just a dead-on camera angle. Expositional beige prose that can quickly become tiresome to read is like the mugshot photo: it's way too objective and/or too lacking in specificity and clarity about its subjectivity.
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yo
Doughnuts not donuts
LMO LMO LMO
big mac booger
Either spelling is correct.
@@tomney4460 50/50 i guess
What matters is the accent, some may say “Mate do you want to get some doughnuts”
And others may say, “Yo wanna get some donut?”