15 Things to STOP EXPECTING from Other People
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- čas přidán 4. 06. 2024
- Your life picks up once you realize you’re in the driver seat instead of the passenger seat!
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________
00:00 - Intro
00:37 - Stop expecting other
people to come into your
life and make it great
01:27 - Stop expecting others
to rise to the potential
you see in them
02:22 - Stop expecting others
to read your mind or act
the way you would act
03:08 - Stop expecting others to be your source of happiness
03:58 - Stop expecting others
to understand that you’re changing
05:58 - You can't’ expect them to have answers to your problems or to realize just how important they are to you
07:01 - Stop expecting
everyone to like you
07:48 - Don’t expect others
to show up for you the way you do for them
08:42 - Don’t expect others
to stay when their time
to go has come
09:29 - Don’t expect others
to make you rich when
you’re not willing to work
11:25 - Don’t expect others
to make you their priority even if you made them yours
12:08 - Don’t expect others
to have their sh*t together
12:49 - Stop demanding
forgiveness even if you changed your ways
13:22 - Stop expecting others
to be on the same journey you’re on
13:59 - Stop expecting others
to give as many f*cks as
you give
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Hello ALUXERS! When's the last time someone let you down?
If you need a mentor, let us show you the way: alux.com/app
@Alux 7 days ago there was a video give us an email but I didn't get a reply.
You forgot that it requires a subscription. it's pricy for just offering videos. Also, after trying your introduction questions..... it needs a major overhaul. Too simplified. No kidding, my physical health needs work, but guess what? I'm also an amputee. I dance and get around as much as my leg allows. I think incorporating the myers' briggs personality test will help....
+
October 7. 2023
The less expectation u have the more happier u are
damn women must be sad creatures
True, but that scenario only applies for those who have already gotten what they want out of life...
I learned (from my grandmother) to treat everyone with "a long wooden spoon". Meaning, treat others with cautious kindness all while being prepared to break off that line of hospitality when necessary.
Where I come from they say "feed them with a long cook spoon". It means be nice but keep your distance.
Yep good old homespun common sense. No Phd’s or fancy quacks. ( not that quacks and knowledge are bad).
My mum used to say.
Love many, trust few and always paddle your own canoe.
Took me years to figure out what the hell she was talking about!
I know im gonna sound like a homer, but no one should ever apologize for having high expectations. That being said; if we can just get fact checking straight and encourage eachother to want to be loved and accepted, think of the amazing progress that could be made ... however not everyone will be able to understand this, and thats ok. It also really comes down to what you want from yourself, even though it doesn't always seem easy...and YES... relying on others too much for happiness will only lead to a path of dissatisfaction and frustration. Though this isn't always the case, as there are exceptions to the rule. And even my one buddy and i had an interesting conversation about this the other day; and we both agree that you can't magically convince certain individuals or groups to buy into your perspective, personality, or beliefs, and typically that is what is the ultimate building block of realizing and not just discovering who you believe you should be. It doesn't just involve thinking, but BELIEVING as well. There are also going to be times you HAVE to think of yourself before thinking of others...because as described in the vid; many people are bombarded with their own concerns for a multitude of reasons...although i believe 'social conditioning' is to blame for why inequality being the way that it is...but again, the more we expect of others and the less loyalty we show to ourselves; the more difficult it will be to avoid the illusion of thinking your sentiment doesn't matter...because it does matter...and the less we compare ourselves to others; the more self focus we can have without being overly selfish or too nice...however you want to put it. A lot of our expectations from ourselves AND OTHERS comes from a MINDSET and a BELIEF SYSTEM. And in order to 'be the change you want to see in the world' as quoted by mahatma Gandhi; it all starts with having expectations that are within reason and not in ways that are delusional and unrealistic.
Bro, Not everyone wants to improve in their field
so even if you tell those people where to make improvements , they will never change
Not everyone has a growth mindset
It is better to walk alone than to walk with afool
Just because they're not meeting expectations they're not fools...I think you have misunderstood this message & the main points in this message
Yeah of course that makes sense if there is no inclusivness there is no good intelegency
I prefer to be a walk alone...I can get to where I want to be that much faster.
expectations often lead to disappointments. Focus on your own journey, be kind, and let others be themselves. That's where true freedom and happiness reside.
Starting early is the best way of getting ahead to build wealth, investing remains a priority. The stock market has plenty of opportunities to earn a decent payouts, with the right skills and proper understanding of how the market works.
You're right
That is why I had to start forex trading 2months ago and l now am making benefits from it.
speaking of forex trading I know I am blessed if not I wouldn't have met someone who is as spectacular as expert Eugene Murphy
The very first time i tried, i invested $1000 and after a week, we received $7500. That really helps me a lot to pay up bills
As a beginner investor, it's essential for you to have a mentor to keep you accountable. Myself, I'm guided by Eugene Murphy. A widely known crypto consultant
+ and,
What did I stop expecting from other people is
#1. I used to think that people care. about others but I am starting to see that no body care about anyone.
#2. I used to think that everyone values other people time. but they don't. all they do is use others to get something from them. in other for them to succeed in life. wile the other person is struggling badly
#3. before I use to think people is financially independent on they self. but I was wrong. for me I am starting to see others trying to use other people to get something from them. without spending they own money, or being financially independent on theyself, or others.
#4. This will not happen to everyone, only me. do to the small country. that i am leaving in. but I will say it.
another issue that i am having is
whenever, I am walking in town people like to look at me without saying anything to me. whenever. I start to shake my head, up and down. or respond to them. they ignores me. by looking down. while walking.
and if I ignores them then the look at me more longer without saying anything. this use to get me so uncomfortable and traumatized.
for me. what I am doing now is I am trying my best. to avoid looking at anyone. while I am walking whenever. I do this. this make me feel different and comfortable and very strange
and whenever others do this to others they talk to them. for me I really, do not know why people like doing that but that make me feel so uncomfortable.
#5. I used to think that everyone likes to help others but this is not always the case. instead people hate helping others and they rather do things alone. or they will get sick and tired of helping others over time. and then they will result to being independent. or cut you off completely by ignoring you.
this is something that I have learned. relying on others for help will only make them talk bad about you. or treat you bad. this is why I rather do every thing on my own without asking anyone for they help.
#6. I used to be nice with everyone but now I am starting to see that others like to look down on others for being to nice or they does bully others for being to nice this is why I stop being nice
#7. I used to shere a lot of my secrets with everyone about my self but now I am starting to see that others will treat me like a boring person.
this is why I rather not tell anyone about myself. this makes me result to self isolation. whenever, I do this I does feel good about myself and I can attract others in my life. without saying anything about my self. this is something that I learn to stay faraway from.
for me. I am very sorry Alux. i can not talk about #8, #9, #10, #11. with you, or anyone. because I am steal going through that traumatizing problem about others. I am not allowed to talk about this. this is way, to personal for me. to talk about it.
I'm this socially awkward dude, and one of my colleagues was like "hey you should be more social because then you can get this and that from those people" lmao so it's basically manipulation to make people like you for goods or services lolol
@@Justin-tu1yw thanks for saying that but. i am not looking to manipulate anyone. if you are referring to me. if not. I understand. It seems like you're pointing out the insincerity behind the idea of being social solely for personal gain. It can feel disingenuous when people only engage with others to get something out of them, rather than building genuine connections. It's important to recognize the value of authenticity in our interactions with others.
in this case, both me and you, are socially awkward. but let's just say your situation is a lot more similar to me. people use to say this to me. a lot whenever, i am reading books at school without interacting with anyone. and when i am always outside by myself without talking to anyone people use to also say that to me when i am always alone. I understand how you feeling.
Definitely some great points, as you just have to see what's out there and not worrying too much what others will think, because everyone has their own meaning of feeling fulfilled and content; though personally I've always seen it as more of an arbitrary concept. And as someone who might not be in the same social status as many of my peers from high-school; I just need to realize that I need to go with the flow and realize that amazing opportunities might be on the horizon, as I've always viewed life in conservative ways; though I've found myself to have viewpoints on occasion that rather seem indifferent or untraditional (but aren't a misrepresentation of my core values). That being said in an ever changing society, life can be quite scary sometimes and very unsettling...but it's just one of those things where you gotta be able to be grateful for what you have...because not everyone has all of the basic needs to survive (such as housing, food, shelter, clean water, clothes, among others). And even though I don't consider my situation to be perfect; I feel very fortunate to have a terrific group of friends and a few close knit family members...and tbh, I'm very grateful for that...along with having all the basic needs I mentioned above. Career wise, I feel as though I can make more of an effort if I'm being genuinely honest; though I think that comes with experience and identifying with yourself in all of the right ways...but sometimes it's easier said than done, and I'm not going to let my overall status discourage me from believing I can make progress. I'm sure with more experience, I will continue to learn more about myself and others, and hopefully be more magnetic and resourceful. Just gotta believe in the lord and hope for the best!
@@EmbraceTheStruggle24😇 In details. back then, whenever, I was going to school as a teenager others come around me when I was sitting on a bench by the basketball cort outside of the school during lunch time while i was reading a story book. others try to socialize with me by asking me about my life, my relationships. or how many friends do I have
for me. whenever, I told anyone the truth. they always told me
they always say (you should always socialize with others more often)
What is the answers you may ask?
@awesomelegs for me the answer is
Whenever, others ask me how I was doing i would usually tell them I does stay at home reading, books or playing games with myself. by talking to myself, walking wile talking to me this was the way I use to have fun as a teenager. because I never had a computer, or a phone. in the pass as a teenager
then they used to say why you do not have any friends, or socialize with others. I would tell them
I love doing things alone. and I am use to always being alone. and I do not feel comfortable talking or hanging out with friends because it use to make me feel uncomfortable backthen as a teenager
to me I was a strange person and I use to do strange things and I find it fun while everyone use to hangout with others or party
back then I use to think socializing with others is so uncomfortable unless. others try to socialize with me if not I would just be alone without looking to talk to anyone. that is how I was.
to me I am a very awkward person.
I never look for friends. to me socializing with myself is what I use to always do whenever I wanted to talk while I was always alone every single day all the time. unless, if others wants to talk to me.
am I always like this (Yes) to me this is a question. I would often get by others all the time.
to @awesomelegs (Q and A) if you want to ask?
Do I find life is scary?
yes
do I hate others?
no
Do I think others does make the world a scary place,?
yes,
how do I see socializing?
I would think it so uncomfortable at the same time it would be fun
if the connection is meaningful, or informative. if not. then, socializing with others is so uncomfortable
to me socializing can be boring to others. if I always talking to them, all the time. compare to just staying quiet. or always alone.
do I have a friend?
yes
Do I talk to them. or hangout with them?
to me I find this so uncomfortable to do i prefer self isolating myself or always being alone.
but I will talk to them by having a short conversation unless if they talk to me longer
for hangout I find it so uncomfortable to do. staying at a parting is so uncomfortable to do
unless if I was playing with myself by saying funny things, or joking with my self, of acting crazy alone. as long I do not involve anyone in it or I stay away from disrespecting anyone.
why you always alone?
I am addicted to being alone. I have no problems with it. maybe I find it fun to be alone.
to me. I really do not have any problems with it.
thanks for asking me about my social life if that is what you wanted to know @awesomelegs
I am very sorry if that makes you so uncomfortable. about me.
I understand if you are a different person that is awkward in a similar way thanks for asking @awesomelegs
ALUX has the potential to revolutionize the world. Keep going my fav content creator
I have come to a point in my life where enough is enough. Honestly God and those he has supporring me are my only friends. It took me a long time to get it, but I get it now. My issue was that every time I started prospering, people would come along. My focus would shift from me to them. Only to have them play in my face. Right now, I am in hermit mode. I only respond to a select few. My focus is inward. I am also listening and seeing the signs that are given to me. I have always been free, but it is only now that I feel free.
I stopped expecting people around me to get better and try harder when I realized it’s a waste of my own energy and I can use that energy on myself.
You can’t help someone who doesn’t help themself.
I have come to see that no one will push themselves as hard as I push myself..thus, I trust only myself to see things to fruition. It also ensures that I do not have to share my glory with anyone.
They did not fuck up jayhova’s name like that😂😂
Shoutout jay z
+, I stopped expecting people to reach out 1st after not speaking and people not responding back after you do reach out 1st
This is such an important video. We place TOO MUCH VALUE on our interactions with others. What's most important is that we FOCUS ON OUR JOURNEY, goals, priorities, and work. I avoid as much as possible the expectations OTHERS HAVE ON ME, and vice versa. All this social crap going on, "oh, he didn't give me the respect I deserve", or "Oh, he doesn't talk much, so he must be a bad person or a retard!" ITS ALL A DISTRACTION! Most people are there FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF DISTRACTING YOU. A distraction from YOUR FOCUS, YOUR WORK, YOUR JOURNEY. Avoid any and all distractions, and most of all, LEARN TO LET GO. LET IT GO. LET HIM/HER GO. NOTHING AND NO ONE IS PERFECT. LET PERFECTION GO.
( + )
I don't expect others to respect me! as i respect them!.
Took me way too long to learn this. Do unto others as you would want done unto you lead ke down a very very bad path.
I have no expectations of people...they move how they move and I respond accordingly. 🧘🏽♀️🍵 +
Facts
I needed this video. Mitigating my expectations of others in my circle has been a life long struggle. I have finally reached a point where I understand that I have to focus on me. This video just confirmed my new mindset.
Me too!
@@changes649same
I have found that no one tries to be a friend to me in the way I try to be for them. Now I can do with a small circle just fine.
I stop expecting people to believe in my dreams ...my own family doubted me,...I'm doing better ever since
THANK YOU!!! These periodic cold showers of Truth are much needed. This channel has very concretely changed my life, for the better. I can say frankly and honestly that I am currectly the best version of myself (still evolving) thanks to you. Practical examples of this have been your Meditation course. Your promo code to start using Audible and the undeniable, invaluable information you offer through these videos which have served me as a compass when I felt I had no direction. You say what you mean, and you mean what you say. I honestly can´t add anything because it would just be repeating what you point out or just saying the same thing differently, but it would be: STOP SEEING YOURSELF AS A SAVIOR. IN THE END YOU CAN ONLY SAVE YOURSELF. Real change starts with you, as an individual. +
People don't listen to understand. People listen to reply.
I stopped expecting people to try and be on the same page before assuming the worst of me and the situation at hand.
Once I know that, and that often some people just don't understand and often do it deliberately. Therefore, you are wasting my time and no one gets to waste my time. They pull that shit and I will not get to converse with me beyond acknowledgement.
+
I stopped giving fxxxs for so long I can't remember when I started 😂😂😂
Thank you my friends and always live long way way more and proser❤
Buddha had summed it up in one word "Overcome Desire" to be precise don't have desires.
Never assume and never expect anything from anyone
Peaple are all bad you will only know that when u need them kind is rare in this world work fr ur self
Simping is different from showing Kindness, Men need to know this fact and stop chasing Women.
Hello Alux🙌🏻
Only objection I have to what was said is about words. Talk is cheap. Actions are real. I'm the guy that'll talk shit to your face and defend you in your absence.😊
+
+ The one thing I stopped doing was caring what people did with my advice. Someone will hear it or read it, and that is the mind I touched.
I needed this . Thanks for being so timely Alux! Wasted the past weeks being bummed up about other people’s behavior towards me.
Hey hey!!! Always on alert for new vids.❤
Awesome! Have an amazing day, everyone +
for number 2 its hard for me. like i admit its hard for me to accept certain things about people right now.
What I have realized is that in this life anything I can’t be in control of I wouldn’t want to be part of, because I lost millions trusting people to manage a portfolio which as experts they were supposed to be doing. DONT GET INVOLVED IN SOMETHING YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. Trust me you will thank me one day ❤
I have stopped expecting people to be happy for me and grateful for what I have done for them.
One of the best videos I have watched in a while.
+ thanks so much for always motivating us.
I have often put small things out there to see if I can trust them... nothing really deep but one way or another, I will know.
If they fail, I hold them at arm's length for good.
Great video. Everyone is your self externalized.
I was seriously disappointed yesterday, Saturday. Theft. But, I was prepared. Nominal monetary loss,
I know where I came from,I know why I'm here and I know where I'm going. __some Wino
The way someone conducts themselves in my home will decide if they will return. I take the sanctity of my home very seriously.
Starting From number 11 those points fit well to my 2021/22 version
Stop regarding opinions from people you don't wanna be like, not even their complements. 😂
Facts
++++
I would like people to study life make it a must study subject mandatory for life holds everything.people asked me were god is the most high my studies show the most potent & obvious form of the most high is life god is life it's self the origin of life is the most high 😊❤❤
+ Go ALUX!!!
#2 is what I’m learning from my 20yr old daughter. Shes gotta learn on her own and I appreciate watching her learn. Mind you she doesn’t listen when I direct her. She’s a “I’mma Find Out For Myself” type of person. I find myself waiting for her to comeback with results. It’s been good lately. 😊❤
There you go! 👏🏼👏🏼Valuable information!
ok...i have to listen to this one daily
Buna dimineata
+ I've kinda always done this. I catastrophize everything in a sandbox, see how it rolls out and draw conclusions. People end up thinking I'm a pessimist, but I'm really an optimist - just rather dark.
The thing that I had to learn was that almost no one can follow my thought processes continuously. If I want people to understand, I have to give them finished conclusions and be prepared to defend them. If I really don't care if they understand, I give them a show.
This video def was a wakeup call for me. Been working on this and I do have people in my life thank God like my mentors and friends that push me out of mediocrity and help me become better daily. However, you are right in the reality that you cannot push someone to leave their comfort zone if they don’t want to. I personally don’t want friends or relationships where they aren’t growing, being the victim, or they want to stay the same.. however I learned I really cannot make people change their potential at all, and I have to accept that.
This is why I say in the end it's only you
Indeed. Apologies, changing your ways and bending over backwards does not erase the damage that was already done. And never let anyone guilt you into believing that not forgiving means that you're a "smaller person" or the "lesser man". The damage and potential kind of life that you've lost will never come back. Forgiving is not the same as letting go and moving on.
Yes, even if that person is begging from the deathbed. Walk away with your head held high even if people ridicule and demonise you. There are definitely others in the world who are on your side.
I stoped expecting to have sanity, to improve their minds, to have integrity with the truth in life, to understand me, to not be deceptive even if they are the biggest claimers of honest, to be decent just because I'm, and to grow up to their age, to diflate their ego, to admit their awfully obvious and stinking dirty deeds, have real values instead of claiming to have the best one in the room, to keep their bathroom clean before they try to be a leader somewhere in public, for people to see through the scam of fake good parents, to play fair, to be as dignified as much as they act to seem one.
I stoped expecting people to have basic humanity when they don't have no one watching or no way to lose nothing or they don't have no one watching to be impressed.
One should hang out with people which belong to same mindset , culture, financial background ( the higher the better) as them.
High quality people attract other high quality people.
Such a timely video. This is more of a relationship Video than anything else to me.
It will be awesome if you guys make more videos on relationships.
9:03 THIS part hurts in business. As soon as the team is highly productive and efficient...change happens.
➕
Q.O.T.D: Got this from you guys: I stopped expecting me from others. Viewed them as their own individualistic self and based my decisions on what i saw, not what i wanted to see...
I have stopped expecting anything from anyone. I took that lesson too hard too many times but I've finally learned it. Hope you all do.
This is a goldmine.
Hey I downloaded the app but I don’t know I can get the 7-Day free trial it only has option month yearly and lifetime
This vid is so real. This was made for me…honestly, i have most…if not all of these expectations of the people around me or a part of my life.
Opening a door to your dreams. ..key word YOUR "Yes Others Undermined Results" (and Rest)...
this hits home so hard.. another amazing video, thanks and keep up the great work!
narrator says you need to keep watching 15 videos in alux channel daily and stop expecting anything to change in your life
Isn't this some kind of chain reaction? We think other people don't care about us and we end up not caring about others. And this is how everyone goes cold.
Try it now... It's still loading. Or was.
Thanks for your new video! Always useful. + /Marie from Sweden
+ I don't expect other's to put the same amount of energy into their work as I am
Have expectacions from yourself and make promises to yourself first.😊
+
I stopped expecting Alux to reply to my emails even though they invited me to write 😝
I love you Alux.
This is one of your best so far...definitely top 10!+
+ 😊
amazing.➕
🥰Don't expect other people to bring you happiness or solve your problems because they are not responsible for your personal success.😍
number 11 was not just about money , it was about everything in this life
Assumptions are the termites of relationships ❤❤
I'm an INTJ-T SIGMA MALE. This video is almost non existent.
+ !! Soul lifting video!
God, I love these
Take it from Hawv.
I love ya Alux Lady, but its pronounced "Hov", not "Hauv"... 😂
+
In summary...Don't expect anything from anybody. Period
I disagree with the "some people were just meant to just stay the same" quote from this episode. Staying the same goes against our natural beings as humans. Imo, we were made to continually evolve. Had it not been for this evolution, we wouldnt be living in the world that we live today...
stopped expecting kindness and compassion from others
Alux is always on point the hard part is to admit
+ thanks for wonderful video ❤
Would be better without stupid actors, and scenes
alux
People not following through with a plan or date. +
+ I stop expecting peoples truth. We all lie subconsciously.
❤
Happy Sunday, Alux!
➕➕
👌🏾💯
Wow no 11 is 💯🗣️
I can't imagine am this early 😮
+. Keeping going!
"+"😊