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Nevilling, heh. I have been so busy I haven't done a lot of intentional "Neviling". Also why I haven't uploaded anything new yet like I planned. I am moving in a month so I plan on making content once I do. :) Thanks for checking though!

Yes.

私もベース奏者として同感だ。

どういたしまして

1989/1990 年頃

素晴らしい

それは Yoshiki!

トシさん、すごく似合ってました！

It is from that time.

その通りです！ 彼の死は、自殺ではなく、事故死だったという事が、よく分かる映像だと思います

Thanks. Exactly my thoughts. He either had bipolar or borderline personality disorder. Borderline because he had huge abandonment issues. I have no idea how other fans can’t see it. The moment he landed in Japan he started promoting a non finished album every day. That night he fought with one of his members at the bar, who told him he’s nothing without Yoshiki. And X was over 5 months prior. He was angry when his brother took him. He heard things being thrown and breaking when he left hide home. Probably fought with his gf too. In fact, she left the apartment when he arrived and came back later to find him passed out in the bathroom. It was probably a dumb decision he made when he was mad and exhausted. I don’t think he really meant it. He’d have apologized to everyone the next morning saying he doesn’t remember a thing. Like he always did🥺

@@ralucamirabela7368 Yeah. I think, but I'm not completely certain, it was mentioned in his authored book of photos and poems that he has the bipolar disorder. I've seen it translated online. When you have that, the downs can be disastrous. He was under a lot of pressure to finish the album while it was the Golden Week elsewhere in society. Holiday seasons can trigger mental issues and conflicts more easily under certain circumstances. Finally, one report had it that he was found sitting with his bottom in the air. This would suggest that he indeed had the intention to kill himself because nobody relieves neck pain by making the cord on which one hangs so short that one is left sitting in midair.

In addition, I think hide found it difficult to separate his art from his other life: Yoshiki, a mentor of his of some kind, has had it the same when he has actually permanently injured himself to aesthetically express himself. Such a life can literally kill one and hide's art was oblivious to, even ridiculing, a healthy and stable life.

@@Stake2 I never heard about the bottom part. But it’s interesting. I know the cops didn’t believe it was an accident because of the way he cut and tied the towel around his neck. Not the type of knot for pain relief on a shoulder. In all his songs and poems he talked about the voices in his head, how there are two entities inside his head, how much he hates himself and how terrified he is to gain weight again and grow old. Most importantly when he got drunk he used to tell friends that he’s better off dead. People are just in denial. He got away with it because he made jokes about it and had a charming personality. He was a certified alcoholic and should’ve never touched alcohol. It made him violent, miserable and a bully. It’s so sad nobody stopped him. I also heard he used to do meth with Imai and the others and that around 1995 he was addicted to cocaine but I don’t know how much of that is true.

@@ralucamirabela7368 Alcohol is often a means to escape something. Ironically, drinking a lot of alcohol is not even "cool" anymore among young people, at least in my country. I've not heard that hide did drugs. Personally, I doubt that. He was just an eccentric. It's sad that hide felt so terribly lonely, especially outside X Japan. His personality represented a steep challenge in Japanese society. But still, he should have had around him people who accepted him as he really was. I fear that X was his main source of finding this acceptance. With X gone, he was left without any compass and people who truly respected (=loved) him for all he was. At least, that's how he probably felt. Even in a contemporary interview, the staff seemed to regard him more as a weird mascot than a wholesome human being. Through humor of course, to which hide joined to save face. Still, that's my interpretation of their underlying approach.

Taijiしか似合わん